namegoeshere: The Irresponsible Captain: We have this thing now called the "Internet" for crissakes where you can buy all kinds of things to designed specifically for you to stick up your bum and they'll be delivered to you in a plain brown box

Just for Fark's sake tie something to the end of it so you can get it back out again.

You've given this some thought. You seem eelily familiar with this sort of thing.

What, no "History of the World Part I" reference?  I am disappointed...wait, was it monty python?

"They shove a live snake up your ass!"

"Very creative...but NO"...

BlousyBrown: namegoeshere: The Irresponsible Captain: We have this thing now called the "Internet" for crissakes where you can buy all kinds of things to designed specifically for you to stick up your bum and they'll be delivered to you in a plain brown box

Just for Fark's sake tie something to the end of it so you can get it back out again.

You've given this some thought. You seem eelily familiar with this sort of thing.

Hah, nice. I've got family members working in the ER. You'd be surprised as what goes in there and doesn't come back out. Then again, you're a farker, so maybe not.

Interesting dinner conversations at Casa Namegoeshere...

namegoeshere: The Irresponsible Captain: We have this thing now called the "Internet" for crissakes where you can buy all kinds of things to designed specifically for you to stick up your bum and they'll be delivered to you in a plain brown box

Just for Fark's sake tie something to the end of it so you can get it back out again.

That's why I keep a string tied around my head.

ChipNASA: Must. Be. Posted.In.All.Butt.Threads.

[i70.photobucket.com image 200x304]

Not to be picky, but that's a hamster, not a gerbil.

Space eels.  Make great pets, but don't let them near your anus.

/Silent Night...

MBooda: When the eel in your butt
makes its way up your gut
that's a moray
[www.divevietnam.com image 760x570]


well done Sir, well done.

JohnAnnArbor: Sounds like the line after the transporter accident in the first Star Trek movie in 1979:

"What we got back.......didn't live long.....fortunately."

/That movie was rated G.  Which was insane.
//That transporter accident was traumatizing to me as a kid.

That scene farked my head up bad as a kid for a while.  I had nightmares about it.  It was almost as bad as the Alien chestburster in terms of mental trauma.  (My mom took me to see Alien when I was 10 thinking it would be like Star Wars!)

xoxo: Eels up inside ya
Finding an entrance where they can
Eels up inside ya
Finding an entrance where they can
Boring through your mind through your tummy through your anus EELS
EELS
EELS EELS EELS EELS

"Live eels wiggling around inside your belly, exploring your organs, like internal black wangers!"

What Gould does he serve?

MBooda: When the eel in your butt
makes its way up your gut
that's a moray
[www.divevietnam.com image 760x570]

For some reason, my head keeps trying to set this to the tune of "Diarrhea" instead.  Not sure why.

Did he go straight to the hospital? Or did he at least, uh, "finish"?

We went camping at Lake Elsinore one summer when I was a kid and I contracted pinworms from the mucky water. I'll never forget having an itchy bum for a day or two, and then realizing that my poop was moving.

I screamed for my mom and puked.

Danger Avoid Death:
MBooda: When the eel in your butt
makes its way up your gut
that's a moray
[www.divevietnam.com image 760x570]

You are one sick bastard. Welcome to my favorites list.

I second that.  Welcome to mine as well, MBooda...and Danger Avoid Death, for being smart, too.  I had to stifle my laughter, as I'm still at work.  Don't think the patients would like that much...

dv-ous: "What we got back didn't live long... fortunately..."

[images.wikia.com image 608x275]

WHERE NO MAN HAS GONE BEFORE!

/I'll get me lucky charms.

twisted_ginger_67: Danger Avoid Death:
MBooda: When the eel in your butt
makes its way up your gut
that's a moray
[www.divevietnam.com image 760x570]

You are one sick bastard. Welcome to my favorites list.

I second that.  Welcome to mine as well, MBooda...and Danger Avoid Death, for being smart, too.  I had to stifle my laughter, as I'm still at work.  Don't think the patients would like that much...

Especially the ones with something stuck up their butt.

MBooda: When the eel in your butt
makes its way up your gut
that's a moray
[www.divevietnam.com image 760x570]

Very nice, good rhythm. You'll be a star!

The Irresponsible Captain: I don't understand this fascination with sticking strange junk up your butt.

We have this thing now called the "Internet" for crissakes where you can buy all kinds of things to designed specifically for you to stick up your bum and they'll be delivered to you in a plain brown box. You'll also never have to explain them to a nurse.

The Internet™ -- It's not just porn.

You sound conservative....
      GET HIM!

fake

Eels last words "What a remarkable anus"

Quantum Apostrophe: Can you make Kopi Luwak unagi with that?

You can but it tastes like sh.....

namegoeshere: BlousyBrown: namegoeshere: The Irresponsible Captain: We have this thing now called the "Internet" for crissakes where you can buy all kinds of things to designed specifically for you to stick up your bum and they'll be delivered to you in a plain brown box

Just for Fark's sake tie something to the end of it so you can get it back out again.

You've given this some thought. You seem eelily familiar with this sort of thing.

Hah, nice. I've got family members working in the ER. You'd be surprised as what goes in there and doesn't come back out. Then again, you're a farker, so maybe not.

Interesting dinner conversations at Casa Namegoeshere...

ok sorry. I too have a family friend who was an x-ray technician. At least once a week she'd tell tale of some guy coming in with something in there. I thought those stories were hysterical.

A vicar previously claimed a potato got stuck up his bottom after

Previous to...what?  Now?

PS:  Notice the hip replacement on the left.

ChrisDe: He sent the eel in to get the gerbil.

Just a worry here, how would the gorillas die during the winter if the environment is at body temperature?

JohnAnnArbor: DirkTheDaring: Anybody who ever knew an ER Nurse learned quickly to never ask them, "So, how was your day?"

ANY nurse.  Or nursing student.

Remember one sitting down to dinner with us in the dorm:  "Today we did catheters."  She started happily eating as the rest of us stopped.

I worked ata photo lab that did some pretty brutal duplications of medical slides. Knife wounds, bullet wounds, some chick show full of arrows  and so on. We also had a 16x20 print of a brain on the wall of the break room. It became pretty easy to dupe these slides, make prints and blowups and still sit down to a bowl of spaghetti for lunch.

Jesus, did anyone look at the X-ray? I mean, really think about it? If this is real, that damn eel was almost to the stomach at that point. Stop and think about how long your intestines are, and that should be enough to blow your mind.

Gyrfalcon: Mikey1969: Jesus, did anyone look at the X-ray? I mean, really think about it? If this is real, that damn eel was almost to the stomach at that point. Stop and think about how long your intestines are, and that should be enough to blow your mind.

That anyone would put a  live eel up there blows my mind anyway, regardless of how far the thing got trying to escape.

Well, there's that... He should have just waited awhile until the thing came out his throat, it looks like.

I know every morning I wake up and think "is there anything a person won't shove up their a**"?
 it's a good thing (for her) the cats not declawed or that baby be up there!

dv-ous: "What we got back didn't live long... fortunately..."

[images.wikia.com image 608x275]

Gottdamnit I was thinking the same thing!

so sorry I clicked on that :(

TrixieDelite: We went camping at Lake Elsinore one summer when I was a kid and I contracted pinworms from the mucky water. I'll never forget having an itchy bum for a day or two, and then realizing that my poop was moving.

I screamed for my mom and puked.

I used to call it "Diaper Lake" after the time I went there and there seemed to be dozens of diapers floating along the shore right at the boat ramp. You must not have heard me.

\trying to stop thinking about eels and butts.
\\well mainly about the eels

It wrecked him.

I'm going to wait until I hear the other side of the story before passing judgement. All sorts of common household accidents could put someone in this predicament.
// let he who has not ended up in the er with foreign objects up the behind cast the first stone

My mother-in-law used to be a trauma nurse. Came home particularly disgusted with humanity one evening and gave her son a call. Turns out, some guy had poured wet cement in his bum or got cement poured in there, allowed it to more or less dry, couldn't get it back out and insisted that he knew nothing about how the cement got into his bum.