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(Reuters)   Your Best Korean troll of the day for April 9, 2013: Pyongyang issues warning for all foreigners to evacuate Worst Korea immediately   (reuters.com) divider line 280
    More: News, Pyongyang, North Koreans, Kaesong, household goods, South Korean government, South Koreans, world leaders, trolls  
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10407 clicks; posted to Main » on 09 Apr 2013 at 2:53 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-04-09 04:53:20 AM

fanbladesaresharp: Not even Dwight can pull that shiat off.


David Brent could.
 
2013-04-09 04:54:00 AM

fanbladesaresharp: universebetween: log_jammin: NobleHam: We're going to go to war with North Korea eventually because we'll have to

exactly. Just like we had to with the Soviets and China. It's inevitable.

we beat USSR in a game of monopoly. they went bankrupt but instead of us getting the money and property and railroads they sold it to their friend Russia who was also playing. we should of won that game.

Did they? As in their government? Thelog_jammin: universebetween: universebetween: log_jammin: universebetween: we beat USSR in a game of monopoly. they went bankrupt but instead of us getting the money and property and railroads they sold it to their friend Russia who was also playing. we should of won that game.

they were too big to fail.

so what you're saying is that tptb saw ussr as a tbtf so they rebranded the product and repackaged them as RUSSIA!

omg it makes sense now. USSR+USA = RUSSiA

and guess who made the packaging? that's right....CHINA!

Never worked at a US printing plant have ya. The money is buried in the companies somewhere, but you are not going to move millions of pounds of dated paper products by ship or plane in a week. Not even Dwight can pull that shiat off.


250,000 dollars in the banana stand.
 
2013-04-09 04:55:45 AM

log_jammin: NobleHam: What, log_jammin, do you imagine will happen to make that regime fall?

No idea. what I do have an idea about is failed attempts at nation building and regime change.

NobleHam: There will be no insurgency or prolonged resistance in North Korea.

thank you Mr Cheney. Here I thought a brainwashed population force fed daily propaganda about the American war machine coming to crush the homes and families might just do more than roll over and whimper, but now we know they would greet us as liberators.


Right. You know failed attempts. Do you know McArthur's success in Japan? Do you know much about West Germany, or German reunification? Both of those are better examples than Iraq, which I would have told you was a mistake in 2002. In Korea you have a homogenous population, the same on both sides of the border. You have a cultural ideal of a unified and self-governed Korea. You have no neighboring countries or international terrorist groups with an interest in creating an insurgency. If the American war machine rolls in there may be a problem yes. That's why ground and occupation forces will have to be South Korean.
 
2013-04-09 04:57:06 AM

fanbladesaresharp: Never worked at a US printing plant have ya. The money is buried in the companies somewhere, but you are not going to move millions of pounds of dated paper products by ship or plane in a week. Not even Dwight can pull that shiat off.


Ooh, ooh, I have. You are correct. Although if they could figure out a way to reliably fly them daily, all your newspapers would be printed in Mexico. Or even better, Pakistan.

/how ya doin' man?
//I'm headin' north soon
 
2013-04-09 05:07:14 AM

NobleHam: Do you know McArthur's success in Japan? Do you know much about West Germany, or German reunification?


yes, I'm fully aware of WWII, and comparing the outcome of WWII with a hypothetical regime change in north Korea is laughable.

NobleHam: In Korea you have a homogenous population, the same on both sides of the border. You have a cultural ideal of a unified and self-governed Korea. You have no neighboring countries or international terrorist groups with an interest in creating an insurgency. If the American war machine rolls in there may be a problem yes. That's why ground and occupation forces will have to be South Korean.


and as I said, on one side of the border you have a brainwashed population force fed daily propaganda about the American war machine coming to crush the homes and families.
 
2013-04-09 05:07:14 AM

UNAUTHORIZED FINGER: fanbladesaresharp: Never worked at a US printing plant have ya. The money is buried in the companies somewhere, but you are not going to move millions of pounds of dated paper products by ship or plane in a week. Not even Dwight can pull that shiat off.

Ooh, ooh, I have. You are correct. Although if they could figure out a way to reliably fly them daily, all your newspapers would be printed in Mexico. Or even better, Pakistan.

/how ya doin' man?
//I'm headin' north soon


EIP, as it has been. Back there now.

/up for beers? no beers?
 
2013-04-09 05:08:53 AM

fanbladesaresharp: UNAUTHORIZED FINGER: fanbladesaresharp: Never worked at a US printing plant have ya. The money is buried in the companies somewhere, but you are not going to move millions of pounds of dated paper products by ship or plane in a week. Not even Dwight can pull that shiat off.

Ooh, ooh, I have. You are correct. Although if they could figure out a way to reliably fly them daily, all your newspapers would be printed in Mexico. Or even better, Pakistan.

/how ya doin' man?
//I'm headin' north soon

EIP, as it has been. Back there now.

/up for beers? no beers?


Beers, definitely!
 
2013-04-09 05:09:02 AM

miss diminutive: NobleHam: limited military action

I think the issue is that many "limited military actions" can easily become "costly and bloody clusterfarks" if things don't go as planned. And we're talking war here, when do things ever go according to plan?


I don't get why we can't just do what we did with Bin Laden. Problem solved.
 
2013-04-09 05:09:43 AM
If the North wants to exist for decades to come, they'll leave the South alone. If it comes to war, China and SK will partition NK and KJU will wind up hanged in a tree, after 200,000 casualties.
 
2013-04-09 05:12:34 AM

Abacus9: miss diminutive: NobleHam: limited military action

I think the issue is that many "limited military actions" can easily become "costly and bloody clusterfarks" if things don't go as planned. And we're talking war here, when do things ever go according to plan?

I don't get why we can't just do what we did with Bin Laden. Problem solved.


I'm sure if fat kim was kicking it in the suburbs of some allied nation, choking down starbucks and spending his free time jerking off, we would. Him being in the middle of a nation where normal sized Koreans, much less Americans would stand out as giants amongst the malnourished.
 
2013-04-09 05:13:57 AM

Abacus9: miss diminutive: NobleHam: limited military action

I think the issue is that many "limited military actions" can easily become "costly and bloody clusterfarks" if things don't go as planned. And we're talking war here, when do things ever go according to plan?

I don't get why we can't just do what we did with Bin Laden. Problem solved.


Bin laden was the head of a nation of 25 million devotees armed with nuclear weapons?
 
2013-04-09 05:14:32 AM

Alonjar: I wonder if everyone is going to keep going "lol right.. stfu stupid fatty" until they randomly start shooting.  I forsee that as being the outcome if he truly is disillusioned (although i doubt it)


Why do you doubt it. So far I have seen no evidence he is illusioned.
 
2013-04-09 05:15:12 AM

Abacus9: miss diminutive: NobleHam: limited military action

I think the issue is that many "limited military actions" can easily become "costly and bloody clusterfarks" if things don't go as planned. And we're talking war here, when do things ever go according to plan?

I don't get why we can't just do what we did with Bin Laden. Problem solved.


For all the jokes about Un, I doubt he's the source of all of this. He's young, Western educated and showed signs of reform. It's likely the military and advisors who are running the show right now, in my opinion.
 
2013-04-09 05:18:45 AM
What would be fun is if, somehow, they "accidentally" threw some bombs China's way. I wonder if that could be arranged...
 
2013-04-09 05:21:05 AM

neongoats: I'm sure if fat kim was kicking it in the suburbs of some allied nation, choking down starbucks and spending his free time jerking off, we would. Him being in the middle of a nation where normal sized Koreans, much less Americans would stand out as giants amongst the malnourished.


miss diminutive: Bin laden was the head of a nation of 25 million devotees armed with nuclear weapons?


I'm just saying, we have intelligence. We can find him. We have the technology to do it remotely. As far as 25 million devotees, I'm sure that's what they want us to think. Drop 'em some food. They'll get over it.
 
2013-04-09 05:21:22 AM

DO NOT WANT Poster Girl: Abacus9: miss diminutive: NobleHam: limited military action

I think the issue is that many "limited military actions" can easily become "costly and bloody clusterfarks" if things don't go as planned. And we're talking war here, when do things ever go according to plan?

I don't get why we can't just do what we did with Bin Laden. Problem solved.

For all the jokes about Un, I doubt he's the source of all of this. He's young, Western educated and showed signs of reform. It's likely the military and advisors who are running the show right now, in my opinion.


I wonder this as well. Is he really sitting in on strategy meetings, hunkered over a map directing policy or do the military junta have him locked away in some bunker somewhere with an xbox and terabytes of porn?
 
2013-04-09 05:21:52 AM

Duck_of_Doom: HaywoodJablonski: Can we have global thermonuclear war already? I'm sick of all the foreplay

Like sleeping with my mom, you'd just be disappointed and wish this never started in the first place.

Spaced Lion: 6 days until KJU hits critical retard mass.

Wasn't there some warning given to diplomats to GTFO by the 10th?  It was posted in another of the zillion NK threads last week.  NK has been beating the war drums very hard over the past few weeks.  Why is he ratcheting up the rhetoric?  Can't just be for food aid.


Not food aid, this time he is holding out for McDonald's
thechive.files.wordpress.com
Note the resemblance.
 
2013-04-09 05:25:28 AM

DO NOT WANT Poster Girl: For all the jokes about Un, I doubt he's the source of all of this. He's young, Western educated and showed signs of reform. It's likely the military and advisors who are running the show right now, in my opinion.


You're probably right. I don't think Kim Jong Un has the power or experience to pull the brakes on NK's crazy train, and the best we can do is keep switching the tracks until it ends up in the ocean. Does this make sense? I woke up with indigestion.
 
2013-04-09 05:28:27 AM

Abacus9: miss diminutive: Bin laden was the head of a nation of 25 million devotees armed with nuclear weapons?

I'm just saying, we have intelligence. We can find him. We have the technology to do it remotely. As far as 25 million devotees, I'm sure that's what they want us to think. Drop 'em some food. They'll get over it.


After some googling, apparently President Ford signed an executive order prohibiting the assassination of foreign leaders. (I assume this implies during peace time, maybe if war were declared they could train their drones on Dear Leader)
 
2013-04-09 05:32:56 AM

Abacus9: miss diminutive: NobleHam: limited military action

I think the issue is that many "limited military actions" can easily become "costly and bloody clusterfarks" if things don't go as planned. And we're talking war here, when do things ever go according to plan?

I don't get why we can't just do what we did with Bin Laden. Problem solved.


Because there are at least 100 people we'd have to do that to. Some crazier, some saner, but all prepared to step up and be as brutal and belligerent as Jong-Un.
 
2013-04-09 05:34:19 AM

log_jammin: NobleHam: Do you know McArthur's success in Japan? Do you know much about West Germany, or German reunification?

yes, I'm fully aware of WWII, and comparing the outcome of WWII with a hypothetical regime change in north Korea is laughable.


You're right. It is laughable. North Korea would be a walk in the park compared to post-war Germany. Bosnia would be a better comparison.

and as I said, on one side of the border you have a brainwashed population force fed daily propaganda about the American war machine coming to crush the homes and families.

And as I said, South Korea would have to be the face.
 
2013-04-09 05:38:52 AM

NobleHam: North Korea would be a walk in the park


whatever
 
2013-04-09 05:43:04 AM

miss diminutive: Abacus9: miss diminutive: Bin laden was the head of a nation of 25 million devotees armed with nuclear weapons?

I'm just saying, we have intelligence. We can find him. We have the technology to do it remotely. As far as 25 million devotees, I'm sure that's what they want us to think. Drop 'em some food. They'll get over it.

After some googling, apparently President Ford signed an executive order prohibiting the assassination of foreign leaders. (I assume this implies during peace time, maybe if war were declared they could train their drones on Dear Leader)


I mean, tying your hands or not, it's a good policy. In much of the world life is cheap, people think nothing of assassinating their way up the chain of command. By signing that order, Ford was saying to the civilized world "we aren't going to do this, don't do this to us".

I wish he had thought of forbidding "secretly funding insurgency organizations" and "supporting fundamentalist colonial dictatorships that burn temples full of buddhists alive for sport", but you know, can't get everything.
 
2013-04-09 05:48:41 AM

miss diminutive: After some googling, apparently President Ford signed an executive order prohibiting the assassination of foreign leaders. (I assume this implies during peace time, maybe if war were declared they could train their drones on Dear Leader)


neongoats: I mean, tying your hands or not, it's a good policy. In much of the world life is cheap, people think nothing of assassinating their way up the chain of command. By signing that order, Ford was saying to the civilized world "we aren't going to do this, don't do this to us".

I wish he had thought of forbidding "secretly funding insurgency organizations" and "supporting fundamentalist colonial dictatorships that burn temples full of buddhists alive for sport", but you know, can't get everything.


NobleHam: Because there are at least 100 people we'd have to do that to. Some crazier, some saner, but all prepared to step up and be as brutal and belligerent as Jong-Un.


Good points, and I'm not suggesting or advocating going around assassinating world leaders. I just think it's a better alternative to full blown war if this thing gets nasty. Better to take out one guy, if we have to, than to kill millions of North Koreans, not to mention how many Americans would get killed over it. For what? Because Mr. God-complex likes to run his mouth.
 
2013-04-09 05:50:19 AM

miss diminutive: DO NOT WANT Poster Girl: Abacus9: miss diminutive: NobleHam: limited military action

I think the issue is that many "limited military actions" can easily become "costly and bloody clusterfarks" if things don't go as planned. And we're talking war here, when do things ever go according to plan?

I don't get why we can't just do what we did with Bin Laden. Problem solved.

For all the jokes about Un, I doubt he's the source of all of this. He's young, Western educated and showed signs of reform. It's likely the military and advisors who are running the show right now, in my opinion.

I wonder this as well. Is he really sitting in on strategy meetings, hunkered over a map directing policy or do the military junta have him locked away in some bunker somewhere with an xbox and terabytes of porn?


His aunt and uncle are running the show, as far as we know
 
2013-04-09 05:51:48 AM

neongoats: miss diminutive: Abacus9: miss diminutive: Bin laden was the head of a nation of 25 million devotees armed with nuclear weapons?

I'm just saying, we have intelligence. We can find him. We have the technology to do it remotely. As far as 25 million devotees, I'm sure that's what they want us to think. Drop 'em some food. They'll get over it.

After some googling, apparently President Ford signed an executive order prohibiting the assassination of foreign leaders. (I assume this implies during peace time, maybe if war were declared they could train their drones on Dear Leader)

I mean, tying your hands or not, it's a good policy. In much of the world life is cheap, people think nothing of assassinating their way up the chain of command. By signing that order, Ford was saying to the civilized world "we aren't going to do this, don't do this to us".

I wish he had thought of forbidding "secretly funding insurgency organizations" and "supporting fundamentalist colonial dictatorships that burn temples full of buddhists alive for sport", but you know, can't get everything.


True. Not to mention, there's no guarantee that simply eliminating Jong Un (or any foreign leader) would actually improve the situation. It could cause an escalation or just create a power vacuum for the next whacko in line.
 
2013-04-09 05:53:54 AM

miss diminutive: neongoats: miss diminutive: Abacus9: miss diminutive: Bin laden was the head of a nation of 25 million devotees armed with nuclear weapons?

I'm just saying, we have intelligence. We can find him. We have the technology to do it remotely. As far as 25 million devotees, I'm sure that's what they want us to think. Drop 'em some food. They'll get over it.

After some googling, apparently President Ford signed an executive order prohibiting the assassination of foreign leaders. (I assume this implies during peace time, maybe if war were declared they could train their drones on Dear Leader)

I mean, tying your hands or not, it's a good policy. In much of the world life is cheap, people think nothing of assassinating their way up the chain of command. By signing that order, Ford was saying to the civilized world "we aren't going to do this, don't do this to us".

I wish he had thought of forbidding "secretly funding insurgency organizations" and "supporting fundamentalist colonial dictatorships that burn temples full of buddhists alive for sport", but you know, can't get everything.

True. Not to mention, there's no guarantee that simply eliminating Jong Un (or any foreign leader) would actually improve the situation. It could cause an escalation or just create a power vacuum for the next whacko in line.


Which is why we should take out the whole farking dump of a country. It's going to be pricey either way.
 
2013-04-09 05:57:51 AM

Abacus9: miss diminutive: After some googling, apparently President Ford signed an executive order prohibiting the assassination of foreign leaders. (I assume this implies during peace time, maybe if war were declared they could train their drones on Dear Leader)

neongoats: I mean, tying your hands or not, it's a good policy. In much of the world life is cheap, people think nothing of assassinating their way up the chain of command. By signing that order, Ford was saying to the civilized world "we aren't going to do this, don't do this to us".

I wish he had thought of forbidding "secretly funding insurgency organizations" and "supporting fundamentalist colonial dictatorships that burn temples full of buddhists alive for sport", but you know, can't get everything.

NobleHam: Because there are at least 100 people we'd have to do that to. Some crazier, some saner, but all prepared to step up and be as brutal and belligerent as Jong-Un.

Good points, and I'm not suggesting or advocating going around assassinating world leaders. I just think it's a better alternative to full blown war if this thing gets nasty. Better to take out one guy, if we have to, than to kill millions of North Koreans, not to mention how many Americans would get killed over it. For what? Because Mr. God-complex likes to run his mouth.


what good do you think killing Dear Eater would do?
 
2013-04-09 05:58:27 AM

robohobo: miss diminutive: neongoats: miss diminutive: Abacus9: miss diminutive: Bin laden was the head of a nation of 25 million devotees armed with nuclear weapons?

I'm just saying, we have intelligence. We can find him. We have the technology to do it remotely. As far as 25 million devotees, I'm sure that's what they want us to think. Drop 'em some food. They'll get over it.

After some googling, apparently President Ford signed an executive order prohibiting the assassination of foreign leaders. (I assume this implies during peace time, maybe if war were declared they could train their drones on Dear Leader)

I mean, tying your hands or not, it's a good policy. In much of the world life is cheap, people think nothing of assassinating their way up the chain of command. By signing that order, Ford was saying to the civilized world "we aren't going to do this, don't do this to us".

I wish he had thought of forbidding "secretly funding insurgency organizations" and "supporting fundamentalist colonial dictatorships that burn temples full of buddhists alive for sport", but you know, can't get everything.

True. Not to mention, there's no guarantee that simply eliminating Jong Un (or any foreign leader) would actually improve the situation. It could cause an escalation or just create a power vacuum for the next whacko in line.

Which is why we should take out the whole farking dump of a country. It's going to be pricey either way.


General MacArthur? Is that you?
 
2013-04-09 06:01:02 AM

miss diminutive: neongoats: miss diminutive: Abacus9: miss diminutive: Bin laden was the head of a nation of 25 million devotees armed with nuclear weapons?

I'm just saying, we have intelligence. We can find him. We have the technology to do it remotely. As far as 25 million devotees, I'm sure that's what they want us to think. Drop 'em some food. They'll get over it.

After some googling, apparently President Ford signed an executive order prohibiting the assassination of foreign leaders. (I assume this implies during peace time, maybe if war were declared they could train their drones on Dear Leader)

I mean, tying your hands or not, it's a good policy. In much of the world life is cheap, people think nothing of assassinating their way up the chain of command. By signing that order, Ford was saying to the civilized world "we aren't going to do this, don't do this to us".

I wish he had thought of forbidding "secretly funding insurgency organizations" and "supporting fundamentalist colonial dictatorships that burn temples full of buddhists alive for sport", but you know, can't get everything.

True. Not to mention, there's no guarantee that simply eliminating Jong Un (or any foreign leader) would actually improve the situation. It could cause an escalation or just create a power vacuum for the next whacko in line.


I don't know about that. Look what happened when Reagan tried it with Khadafi. We didn't get him, but we didn't really get much trouble out of him after that either.
 
2013-04-09 06:06:53 AM

21-7-b: what good do you think killing Dear Eater would do?


more food for everyone else.
 
2013-04-09 06:07:51 AM

Abacus9: I don't know about that. Look what happened when Reagan tried it with Khadafi. We didn't get him, but we didn't really get much trouble out of him after that either.


So you're plan is that the US basically act as the mafia?

"Hey boss, the bomb went off but...y'know...he didn't die."
"That's ok, as long as he gets the message. Now pass the cannoli."
 
2013-04-09 06:08:26 AM
Google: kim aunt uncle
 
2013-04-09 06:08:32 AM

miss diminutive: So you're your plan


sonofa...
 
2013-04-09 06:10:17 AM
They won't attack.  The people leading North Korea know they would lose their cushy jobs and that's the most important thing to them.
 
2013-04-09 06:14:33 AM
Anyone advocating military action is clearly NOT located in Seoul.

If I lived in Seoul I would be advocating just paying them off. Not that i think they will do anything, just would like to ensure I didn't get nuked.
 
2013-04-09 06:15:24 AM
...Well, it's okay - we're actually ratcheting down the tension by reducing or shutting off flying hours to the USAF squadrons that are supposed to deal with Kimmie if he comes south:

http://www.defensenews.com/article/20130408/DEFREG02/304080011/Reduc ed -Flying-Hours-Forces-USAF-Ground-17-Combat-Air-Squadrons

Country's in the best of hands.
 
2013-04-09 06:22:33 AM

log_jammin: 21-7-b: what good do you think killing Dear Eater would do?

more food for everyone else.


Where's Bob Geldof when you need him?
 
2013-04-09 06:22:45 AM

Space Monkey 39: Anyone advocating military action is clearly NOT located in Seoul.

If I lived in Seoul I would be advocating just paying them off. Not that i think they will do anything, just would like to ensure I didn't get nuked.


Howzabout SK pay them off?

Any why should we deal with hostage takers, which they effectively are? There are reasons we don't give into demands.
 
2013-04-09 06:23:13 AM

miss diminutive: So you're plan is that the US basically act as the mafia?


No, and I wouldn't try something like this unless it was wartime and absolutely necessary to save lives. It's one guy vs millions.

miss diminutive: "Hey boss, the bomb went off but...y'know...he didn't die."
"That's ok, as long as he gets the message. Now pass the cannoli."


"Made 'im an offer he couldn't refuse, maybe now paisan will keep his cakehole shut." But no, not really this.
 
2013-04-09 06:29:02 AM
We can't be fighting no foreign wars right now! They got this here sequestration on, i got to do for me and mine.

i36.photobucket.com

//hot like a Hogwallup
 
2013-04-09 06:31:17 AM

Abacus9: miss diminutive: So you're plan is that the US basically act as the mafia?

No, and I wouldn't try something like this unless it was wartime and absolutely necessary to save lives. It's one guy vs millions.


I get that you're approaching this from a "needs of the many" versus "the needs of the few" angle. But is there a guarantee that just killing one man would actually save lives? It seems like it would be setting a dangerous precedent for a roll of the dice that might blow up our faces.
 
2013-04-09 06:33:51 AM

miss diminutive: Abacus9: miss diminutive: So you're plan is that the US basically act as the mafia?

No, and I wouldn't try something like this unless it was wartime and absolutely necessary to save lives. It's one guy vs millions.

I get that you're approaching this from a "needs of the many" versus "the needs of the few" angle. But is there a guarantee that just killing one man would actually save lives? It seems like it would be setting a dangerous precedent for a roll of the dice that might blow up our faces.


There's really no guarantee for anything. What good would yet another war do us, or a nuclear strike? I'm hoping all of this is avoidable, and I don't really think anything will come of this. I just don't see a better alternative if this guy means business.
 
2013-04-09 06:37:00 AM
You could take the boy out, but the people in charge of propaganda will decide how it is reported, so you're still in the same place
 
2013-04-09 06:39:26 AM
img541.imageshack.us
 
2013-04-09 06:42:36 AM
After years of being allied with South Korea providing training, security, and various military supports and years of imposed embargoes and sanctions on North Korea; the S. Koreans should have this "war" well within their hands and not need direct intervention from the US -CORRECT?

I mean if the S.K. cant handle the game with the deck stacked in their favor then we've backed a lousy player.
 
2013-04-09 06:43:50 AM

Frederick: After years of being allied with South Korea providing training, security, and various military supports and years of imposed embargoes and sanctions on North Korea; the S. Koreans should have this "war" well within their hands and not need direct intervention from the US -CORRECT?

I mean if the S.K. cant handle the game with the deck stacked in their favor then we've backed a lousy player.


I don't think there's any doubt that they'll win. The question is, at what cost?
 
2013-04-09 06:43:50 AM
"I tell people to reave and they don't reave!  Why aren't they reaving?  Why is nobody ristening to me!?"


Seriously, though...Un was educated outside of Best Korea.  He has to realize what the rest of the world has, right?  He know's his country would be destroyed in any sort of war, right?
 
2013-04-09 06:44:27 AM
*ARGH...knows

NEED MOAR COFFEE!
 
2013-04-09 06:47:36 AM
Dennis Rodman what have you done?!
 
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