If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Pajiba)   For a refreshing change, a mom posts a list of 10 things about which non-breeders need to ESS. TEE. EFF. YOO. (Update: Turns out the author is a dad)   (pajiba.com) divider line 421
    More: Hero, morning shows, Blair Koenig, mom, doctor's visit  
•       •       •

23571 clicks; posted to Main » on 09 Apr 2013 at 9:12 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



421 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | » | Last | Show all
 
2013-04-09 10:27:49 AM
There are idiots on both sides. I've seen idiot parents, and I've seen idiot childless people, and each side also has good representation as well.

I control my child, and do it well. No tantrums, no outrageous behavior - she knows it's not allowed - and because of that, she's generally very well behaved. If words are required or a scene starts, Outside We Go until it's over.  PS - she's also good on airplanes, but that doesn't stop people from giving us dirty looks when we bring her on the plane. Don't assume how anyone will act in any situation. Judge them all by their actions, not by what you THINK their actions might be.
 
2013-04-09 10:29:35 AM

Guairdean: At this age (2-3) that is not appropriate. That is frank emotional abuse and should be avoided as a parenting technic. You need to wait until the child is capable of reasonably and clearly expressing himself, and can carry on a meaningful conversation about the topic at hand- usually that's 4 or 5 years old. At that point is is appropriate to be corrective; younger than that and it's abusive.A  child at that age is perfectly capable of understanding the word "No", and that there are consequences for bad behavior. Failing to teach a child how to behave is abusive.


Of course they are, but they are not capable of advanced reasoning or knowing right from wrong anymore than a dog is. The key is knowing that they will grow up to know right from wrong. If all you tech them atthis age is that expressing themselves is greeted with a physical blow, they will be fearful and bunged up when they get older. Like teaching a dog not to bark by hitting it- you may get peace and quiet, but it makes for a miserable, screwed up animal. Teach it not to bark with a mix of rewards and consequences.

You don't need to beat a two year old. No one does.
 
2013-04-09 10:31:25 AM
Not that it matters, but Dustin is a dude's name. Article was not written by a "mom".
 
2013-04-09 10:32:31 AM
I was roughly with her (not that I have kids, but she made some sense) until she talked about repopulating the earth. There are more people living now than at any point in the past. We aren't REpopulating the earth, we're OVERpopulating the earth, you idiot.
 
2013-04-09 10:33:02 AM

neversubmit: It's not that you are a breeder, it's that you are an asshole.


Score!
 
2013-04-09 10:34:06 AM

willfullyobscure: Guairdean: At this age (2-3) that is not appropriate. That is frank emotional abuse and should be avoided as a parenting technic. You need to wait until the child is capable of reasonably and clearly expressing himself, and can carry on a meaningful conversation about the topic at hand- usually that's 4 or 5 years old. At that point is is appropriate to be corrective; younger than that and it's abusive.A  child at that age is perfectly capable of understanding the word "No", and that there are consequences for bad behavior. Failing to teach a child how to behave is abusive.

Of course they are, but they are not capable of advanced reasoning or knowing right from wrong anymore than a dog is. The key is knowing that they will grow up to know right from wrong. If all you tech them atthis age is that expressing themselves is greeted with a physical blow, they will be fearful and bunged up when they get older. Like teaching a dog not to bark by hitting it- you may get peace and quiet, but it makes for a miserable, screwed up animal. Teach it not to bark with a mix of rewards and consequences.

You don't need to beat a two year old. No one does.


People that can't tell the difference between a swat and a beating have serious emotional issues. Please get these straightened out before you start raising a child.
 
2013-04-09 10:34:33 AM

The Snow Dog: Not that it matters, but Dustin is a dude's name. Article was not written by a "mom".


Huh. Imagine that. Someone who actually looks at the byline.
 
2013-04-09 10:36:07 AM

Louisiana_Sitar_Club: Should we take away something? Because she's three, does she really have anything of value?

To her, yes.  This use to work fantastic on my daughter at that age.

<Kid situation>
Me:  You better stop what you're doing or I'm going to put one of your toys in time out.
Kid:  What are you gonna take?
Me:  What do you think I'm gonna take?
Kid: (GASP)  Not my Shamu!?!
Me:  Oh, you bet it's your Shamu.
</Kid situation>


Okay that gave me the giggles. I read the "Me" part in Bender's voice.
 
2013-04-09 10:36:28 AM

Weigard: Really, do you have any idea how little we care about how adorable your puppy looks peeking out from under the blankets?

You should, my dog's way cuter than that ugly dollop of mayonnaise you call a baby.


Lol. My thought too, except I said "snot blob" instead...i like your mayo analogy better :).
 
2013-04-09 10:37:08 AM

ItsJustJake: There are idiots on both sides. I've seen idiot parents, and I've seen idiot childless people, and each side also has good representation as well.

I control my child, and do it well. No tantrums, no outrageous behavior - she knows it's not allowed - and because of that, she's generally very well behaved. If words are required or a scene starts, Outside We Go until it's over.  PS - she's also good on airplanes, but that doesn't stop people from giving us dirty looks when we bring her on the plane. Don't assume how anyone will act in any situation. Judge them all by their actions, not by what you THINK their actions might be.


A few months ago, my wife and my two-year old go into a seat-yourself cajun place sometime after the lunch rush.  There were plenty of open tables and we picked the one furthest away from anyone.  Not long after we order and get our drinks, this youngish (mid-20s) couple comes in and sits at a table directly adjacent to ours (even though there were plenty of other's available).  My wife adjusted some of the things in front of my son and he made a brief 1/2 second loud-ish whine about something she was moving and I immediately stopped it and corrected his behavior...quietly.  The girl at the adjacent table looks over, flashes this annoying look, then quietly says something to her boyfriend and they move to one of the many available tables further away.

Some people are douche bags no matter what.
 
2013-04-09 10:37:13 AM
FTFA: We can't spank them because you childless hippie liberals have taken that away from us.

Why am I not surprised that the author couldn't resist unnecessarily including her political affiliation in the article, as well as doing it in an intentionally offensive manner?
 
2013-04-09 10:40:18 AM

UberDave: ItsJustJake: There are idiots on both sides. I've seen idiot parents, and I've seen idiot childless people, and each side also has good representation as well.

I control my child, and do it well. No tantrums, no outrageous behavior - she knows it's not allowed - and because of that, she's generally very well behaved. If words are required or a scene starts, Outside We Go until it's over.  PS - she's also good on airplanes, but that doesn't stop people from giving us dirty looks when we bring her on the plane. Don't assume how anyone will act in any situation. Judge them all by their actions, not by what you THINK their actions might be.

A few months ago, my wife and my two-year old go into a seat-yourself cajun place sometime after the lunch rush.  There were plenty of open tables and we picked the one furthest away from anyone.  Not long after we order and get our drinks, this youngish (mid-20s) couple comes in and sits at a table directly adjacent to ours (even though there were plenty of other's available).  My wife adjusted some of the things in front of my son and he made a brief 1/2 second loud-ish whine about something she was moving and I immediately stopped it and corrected his behavior...quietly.  The girl at the adjacent table looks over, flashes this annoying look, then quietly says something to her boyfriend and they move to one of the many available tables further away.

Some people are douche bags no matter what.


I vastly prefer the company of 2 year olds, even ones that a little fussy, to mid 20 year olds.  By a large margin
 
2013-04-09 10:40:55 AM

I May Be Crazy But...: I was roughly with her (not that I have kids, but she made some sense) until she talked about repopulating the earth. There are more people living now than at any point in the past. We aren't REpopulating the earth, we're OVERpopulating the earth, you idiot.


i14.photobucket.com
 
2013-04-09 10:41:19 AM

jigger: This tumblr has been making the rounds. Is this kid typical or is he just a little biatch? I vote little biatch. Honestly, I don't think I could handle this little fark without choking him out.

http://reasonsmysoniscrying.tumblr.com/


Generally, any one of those situations is typical.  All of them at the same time is not.
 
2013-04-09 10:41:38 AM
So breeders want acknowledgement for all their hard work? OK, fine, here you go

favim.com

/get over it
 
2013-04-09 10:41:51 AM
I think the author is kind of a moron, but I do agree with the family restaurant comment. If you voluntarily go out to eat at a family restaurant, you deserve all the hell that is piled upon you. You want a nice dining experience, go to a nice restaurant. Otherwise, STFU, whether you have children or not.
 
2013-04-09 10:42:22 AM
I think she must have made her point.  Her stated premise for the article was to show "non-breeders" how annoying and petty it looks like when people biatch about your choice to have, or to not have, kids.  At least that's what I took away from it.  And while she had some valid statements, she exaggerated them intentionally applied the complaints as a stereotype to everyone without children.  Just the way people in threads just like this one lump kids into one stereotype.  Here's the thing, My daughter is great most of the time, but sometimes she goes a little crazy, gets headstrong and belligerent and won't listen to calm instruction and I have to go further.  Maybe I could break her of this, maybe I could force her to behave all the time, but then what would I be left with?  I don't want her to be some whiny, milquetoast assbag who spends all their time biatching about how poorly other people's kids behave.  Sometimes even good kids misbehave, it's because of the developmental cycle of the human being that they need to spend several years (sometimes more than 20) learning to fit into society.  Everyone goes through it, and one thing I can say is that anyone who says they *never* did any of these cardinal sins of being a kid is a liar (or has conveniently forgotten what a PITA they were as a child), and maybe the reason they're such self righteous pricks today is because their parents thought it was more important that they not be embarrassed in public than it was to make sure their children grew up to be good people.
 
2013-04-09 10:43:26 AM
What a judgmental twat.
 
2013-04-09 10:43:35 AM
That's a long list.  With that list in mind, what are the parents suppose to talk about then?
Remember that their time is filled with children's activities.   So should they talk about what TV they watched for 6 hours or what level they made it to on their favorite video game...like childless people?
 
2013-04-09 10:45:07 AM

ThatGuyFromTheInternet: I May Be Crazy But...: I was roughly with her (not that I have kids, but she made some sense) until she talked about repopulating the earth. There are more people living now than at any point in the past. We aren't REpopulating the earth, we're OVERpopulating the earth, you idiot.

[i14.photobucket.com image 750x563]


I guess I'm not seeing which part of what I said was totally out there. There's room for argument about what the carrying capacity of the earth is, I suppose.
 
2013-04-09 10:45:36 AM

LlamaGirl: What a judgmental twat.


That is the funniest thing I've read all day 8D
 
2013-04-09 10:46:35 AM
FTFA:2a.The Sheer Mess that Some Kids Make When Out to Eat is Astounding - Yeah. That's why we go out, dumbass. We just paid $7 plus (a very generous) tip for a crappy grilled cheese sandwich so we wouldn't have to deal with that mess.

What?  You paid SEVEN WHOLE DOLLARS for a meal at a sit-down restaurant?  Well holy shiat lady, I didn't realize you paid seven dollars!  By all means, please allow your demon spawn to throw his food all over the place, including onto my neighboring table, and make a giant wet mess for the waitress to clean up!

Tip:  If you're at a restaurant and feel that the price for the food is outrageous enough that your child should be given permission to do anything he wants, you have to realize that the other customers are ALSO paying the same prices and should be just as entitled to whatever THEY want, including not having their meal disrupted.
 
2013-04-09 10:47:36 AM

I May Be Crazy But...: ThatGuyFromTheInternet: I May Be Crazy But...: I was roughly with her (not that I have kids, but she made some sense) until she talked about repopulating the earth. There are more people living now than at any point in the past. We aren't REpopulating the earth, we're OVERpopulating the earth, you idiot.

[i14.photobucket.com image 750x563]

I guess I'm not seeing which part of what I said was totally out there. There's room for argument about what the carrying capacity of the earth is, I suppose.


Her side of it, the population upkeep thing.
 
2013-04-09 10:48:20 AM
I'm going to say this and I only hope that woman in the article reads and pays close attention.

I have no problem with your child. It's a child. It doesn't know better most of the time because it's a child and therefore a behavioral work-in-progress. I have every problem with a parent who is so detached from the situation and blinded by favoritism for their offspring that they cannot acknowledge when their child is out of line and needs more than a yelling at from across the room.

You bring your child to a restaurant, don't act surprised when the screaming starts making the people around you feel like your ass should've stayed home. Give them something to do other than throw a temper tantrum because they're bored waiting for food or the bill. Ask the host or hostess for a few extra coloring sheets and crayons. They'll be pleased to give them to you if it means the children will continue to behave and not disrupt the dining experience of other customers. I don't care if your child pops their head over the top of the booth to talk to me, but if your child cannot handle the situation without turning into a danger for waitstaff by running around the floor perhaps eating out should be done at lunch times when they're not as busy.

Again, empty threats from across the room do nothing. It's why me and my siblings have always listened to my mom instead of my dad. We knew mom would have absolutely no problem with following through on her threats. Dad would talk a big game but never follow through. If you're incapable of figuring out a way to correct your child and make it stick, you'll end up with a kid who thinks you're all talk and doesn't respect you at all.
 
2013-04-09 10:49:16 AM

ThatGuyFromTheInternet: I May Be Crazy But...: I was roughly with her (not that I have kids, but she made some sense) until she talked about repopulating the earth. There are more people living now than at any point in the past. We aren't REpopulating the earth, we're OVERpopulating the earth, you idiot.

[i14.photobucket.com image 750x563]


That is the saddest looking doggie.  I feel bad now.
 
2013-04-09 10:49:56 AM

dkimball: So should they talk about what TV they watched for 6 hours or what level they made it to on their favorite video game...like childless people?


You must have some dipshiat childless friends if that's all they talk about.
 
2013-04-09 10:51:09 AM

computerguyUT: As a parent of

6 kids (hers mine and ours) ranging form 8 to 28, the article is dead on.   Like it or not.

Wanna know how I know you're wrong?
 
2013-04-09 10:51:46 AM

ThatGuyFromTheInternet: I May Be Crazy But...: ThatGuyFromTheInternet: I May Be Crazy But...: I was roughly with her (not that I have kids, but she made some sense) until she talked about repopulating the earth. There are more people living now than at any point in the past. We aren't REpopulating the earth, we're OVERpopulating the earth, you idiot.

[i14.photobucket.com image 750x563]

I guess I'm not seeing which part of what I said was totally out there. There's room for argument about what the carrying capacity of the earth is, I suppose.

Her side of it, the population upkeep thing.


Oh, good. I was afraid I'd had some sort of brain damage that makes me completely unable to see where I'm going off the rails.

Normally I drink to get that effect!
 
2013-04-09 10:52:01 AM
Does she really think that someone incapable of the patience and generosity required to be a parent is going to be able to read that whole "list"?
 
2013-04-09 10:52:25 AM

Lusiphur: I think the author is kind of a moron, but I do agree with the family restaurant comment. If you voluntarily go out to eat at a family restaurant, you deserve all the hell that is piled upon you. You want a nice dining experience, go to a nice restaurant. Otherwise, STFU, whether you have children or not.


But what would you qualify as a "family restaurant?"

Chucky cheese & McD's? Sure, I can see that. Places like the Olive Garden? I'll give it a pass. The problem is when parents qualify any area that serves food, is less than $50 a plate, and allows people under 21 as a "family restaurant."

Just because you can take your 2-foot-tall screaming terrorist to an affordable steakhouse, on a Friday night, doesn't mean you should.
 
2013-04-09 10:52:34 AM

JPSimonetti: Mercutio74: Full disclosure, I'm a parent of a 4 yr old girl.

The article makes some good points, but number 9 is bullshiat.  Whenever my precious snowflake is doing something that isn't very precious and is annoying/hurting/generally shiat disturbing others and she doesn't respond to my chairbourne correction, I get up and deal with her....  usually by crouching down in front of her, telling her I want to talk to her, explaining why what she's doing isn't acceptable and threatening her with a time out if she continues.  If that doesn't take care of it, then I follow through with the time out unless she behaves.

Why do I do this?  Because I want my chair-based words of correction to farking mean something.  My sister in law shrieks at her children and they don't give a fark because they know it doesn't mean anything.  On the other hand, the 9 times out of 10 when I calmly tell her to stop doing something stupid and other parents tell me how well behaved she is, it's not because she's awesome (which she is, I have to be honest) it's because she knows that there are consistent and knowable consequences to misbehaving and it's more fun to find something else to get into.

We have plenty of ways to make our kids behave without thrashing them or inducing some kind of cruelty...  if your kid is misbehaving it's probably because you don't follow through on your correction of their behaviour and they know you're full of shiat.

First off, this is not sarcasm ... Using fear as a tactic to keep kids in line is absolutely a great way to get them to pull it together in public. I use that card with my 9 year old a few times a month. A very sharp glare and pointed finger is all it takes for him to straighten up, and it doesn't cause a scene. He knows what's coming next. It is that fear that makes him straighten up. It was that fear that kept ME in line as a kid. It works, and it's more humane than constant beatings. (my father and I have a great relationship these days. it did ...


A point my wife continually misses.......
 
2013-04-09 10:54:15 AM

MythDragon: Little bastard want to act up? I'll quickly grab him, roll him onto his back, put my face about 1 inch from his and say "NO". Tries to climb up the dresser? Spray him with the water bottle. Runs around all crazy, I'll park him on his butt and say "Sit". Takes toys from other children, and into the baby crate he goes.


I shiat you not, our old next door neighbors had a mentally retarded child. She cannot speak, only knows limited sign language, and gets violent at the drop of a hat. The only thing that works for her is when she does something wrong, her mother will squirt her with the water bottle and Amelia knows that's her signal to go into her time out chair. Putting her there physically never worked. Taking away her favorite toy never worked. But a shot of water to the side of her head does.
 
2013-04-09 10:54:22 AM
That was hilarious!

I especially like the line about her wanton desire to beat her child, but NOOOOOOOO, she can't, because of DUMB HIPSTERS.

F'in hipsters and their pesky, non child-beating way.

Mr. Duston Rowles must be a troll aggregate.
 
2013-04-09 10:55:05 AM
FTA: "6. I Get Irritated When Parents Blabber on about Being So Busy - Oh, honey. We're not that busy. When you manage to fold in taking care of a child into your full time job, we parents become excellent time managers. I manage three kids, writing for two sites, consume 30-40 hours of media each week, and still find time to hang out with friends. If we are "too busy" to hang out, it just means that we think that changing diapers and reading Where the Wild Things Are is more fun than hanging out with you."

Wait . . . by saying "consume 40 hours of media" (aka. watching TV on the couch), this person believes they're busy?
 
2013-04-09 10:56:30 AM

THX 1138: FTFA:2a.The Sheer Mess that Some Kids Make When Out to Eat is Astounding - Yeah. That's why we go out, dumbass. We just paid $7 plus (a very generous) tip for a crappy grilled cheese sandwich so we wouldn't have to deal with that mess.

What?  You paid SEVEN WHOLE DOLLARS for a meal at a sit-down restaurant?  Well holy shiat lady, I didn't realize you paid seven dollars!  By all means, please allow your demon spawn to throw his food all over the place, including onto my neighboring table, and make a giant wet mess for the waitress to clean up!

Tip:  If you're at a restaurant and feel that the price for the food is outrageous enough that your child should be given permission to do anything he wants, you have to realize that the other customers are ALSO paying the same prices and should be just as entitled to whatever THEY want, including not having their meal disrupted.


Missing that gem is what I get for skimming. There is no tip less than $50 that will make up for having to clean up after your kid covers half the room is in his food and spit and snot. Although, I guess if the author has to clean up after that every day, I can understand wanting a night off. I'd also understand making an attempt to get the kid to not throw stuff all over he place when he's eating.
You know what, make it more than $50. Because the other tables near you aren't going to tip me after having to put up with that, so you can make up for their tips also.
 
2013-04-09 10:56:30 AM

mightybaldking: jigger: This tumblr has been making the rounds. Is this kid typical or is he just a little biatch? I vote little biatch. Honestly, I don't think I could handle this little fark without choking him out.

http://reasonsmysoniscrying.tumblr.com/

Generally, any one of those situations is typical.  All of them at the same time is not.


Yeah, no way to really judge that unless you know how far apart those incidents are.  If it's only once a week, probably not that big of a deal.
 
2013-04-09 10:56:34 AM

MrSteve007: Lusiphur: I think the author is kind of a moron, but I do agree with the family restaurant comment. If you voluntarily go out to eat at a family restaurant, you deserve all the hell that is piled upon you. You want a nice dining experience, go to a nice restaurant. Otherwise, STFU, whether you have children or not.

But what would you qualify as a "family restaurant?"

Chucky cheese & McD's? Sure, I can see that. Places like the Olive Garden? I'll give it a pass. The problem is when parents qualify any area that serves food, is less than $50 a plate, and allows people under 21 as a "family restaurant."

Just because you can take your 2-foot-tall screaming terrorist to an affordable steakhouse, on a Friday night, doesn't mean you should.


THIS. I read this in TFA and was like, "So because I don't want to deal with annoying kids, I'm not allowed in burger or pizza places that are withing my meager income?"
 
2013-04-09 11:01:38 AM
1. I -dont- post pics of my pets on FB. Thanks for projecting.

2. There is no such thing as a non-family restaurant... believe me if there was, i'd go there EXCLUSIVELY.

3. I have never complained about shy children, In fact it would be fine with me if they were all shy.

4.  I never claimed to understand parenthood.

5. Once again, i dont post that shiat on FB... you can STFU about that now.

6.  Its fine with me if you dont have time to bring your rugrats around to wreck my place.

7.  Meh, you dont need babysitters anymore, it is now perfectly acceptable to take your farking children EVERYWHERE. Its why we're not allowed to have fun at Ozzie concerts anymore. Its "family entertainment" now.  UGH.

8.  Yea, i dont refer to myself as my doggies "daddy" either... thats just weird.

9.  This childless liberal hippie is all about you beating the hell out of your children when they deserve it. Hell if you dont want to, let me know & i'll do it for you.

10.  fark you... ever worked a 40+ hour shift?  Ever worked more than 360 days in a single year? I've done both... to cover up for busy parents who didnt have time to show up for their farking job.
 
2013-04-09 11:04:02 AM
I have no kids but I helped two of my three sisters, extensively, to raise their kids. (four in all) Changing diapers, going to school functions, the whole business hell I even talked to my oldest nephew about the birds and the bees so any know it all parent tries that high ground shiat on me is in for it. Having said that every last thing on that list is a legitimate complaint. My policy was you act up in a restaurant or movie we leave immediately no exceptions. Maybe I lucked out but after the age of like 5 the children understood this and acted accordingly. As opposed to when they were out with their mothers and they would act like farking drunk goblins terrorizing them and anyone unfortunate enough to be within sight and earshot. My point being most kids will do anything and everything you allow them to, its in their nature to test limits. This is where the parents lose this argument. I have seen plenty of families with well behaved, considerate children of all ethnicities, economic levels and religions. Fark it my point is if you say you can't control your kids in public that is a failure on your part not theirs. If can't corral the them then you have no business taking them in public or even having them in the first place probably.

Now cue the mom brigade to tell me how I don't know shiat because I was smart enough to use contraception and they weren't.
 
2013-04-09 11:04:09 AM
1)  Non issue, unfriend or hide their posts if you don't want to see facebook pics
2)  I typically don't go to restaurants that are designated "family friendly", I've seen unruly kids and parent's who refuse to control them (or take responsibility for their crotch fruit) at most establishments I've patronized.  Why should everyone else have to suffer because you refuse to take responsibility for your child?
2a)  I don't care how messy your table gets while eating, just as long as it doesn't come over to my table when I'm eating.
3)  I don't care if your child is paying attention to me or not, I'd prefer if your child was "shy" (or just anti-social)
4)  What's there to understand, it's your child, you are legally responsible for them, so maybe take some responsibility for raising them, and correcting behavior that is negative towards other people and society?
5)Again, I don't care how long a video of your child is...why is she griping about this...
6)Again, I don't care how busy you are, if you don't want to hang out with friends, that's your choice, but if you never make time for people, they won't be your friends forever (but that's on you, I highly doubt you're that special snowflake you think you are, and that they're sulking because they can't hang out with you)
7)  Kind of goes with #6, but one of my peeves if parent's who bring their infants to bars or weddings or movies, is your 9 month old baby going to really remember or have any sort of enjoyable experience at a wedding?
8)  Calling someone "mommy" or "daddy" is creepier than most other pet names, stop trying to justify that it's just as creepy as other pet names people have
9)  This is ridiculous, "yelling" at your kids is not the end all solution to correcting bad behavior, if you need to get your fat ass up and deal with them, then do it.  If they are not listening to what you say, then you need to use other tactics (such as physically correcting the problem, if they're throwing something, take it away for example).  This reminds me of dog owners who think that they can "reason" with their pet, yelling may or may not work, if it doesn't, then you need to physically intervene.
10)I agree with this point, when it comes to family and friends, if you don't want to be around parents or kids, don't be.  But at the same time, why would you need to "repopulate" the Earth?  Do you realize we humans are breeding at exponential rates, and the Earth will eventually be unable to sustain all of us?  Do you also realize that there are a lot of situations where people who do not know you, are forced to be in a situation with your crotch fruit, so bottom line, take responsibility for your legal responsibilities.
 
2013-04-09 11:09:59 AM
Having said that every last thing on that list is a legitimate complaint.

Except the shy kids of course I find a lot of "shy" kids just spend more time thinking and less talking, a good policy for anyone.
 
2013-04-09 11:11:44 AM
FTFH:  For a refreshing change, a mom posts a list of 10 things about which non-breeders need to ESS. TEE. EFF. YOO

i75.photobucket.com
 
2013-04-09 11:13:03 AM

kumanoki: It's been suggested that Stephen Hawking stole his Brief History of Time from your fourth-grade paper?


I can easily refute that. I came to some very different conclusions, so if he'd read it, he wouldn't have had some of the flaws he had to correct later.
 
2013-04-09 11:16:58 AM
Look, just slap your kid if he or she is being a doof in public. That'll solve a lot of the problem. It's OK.
 
2013-04-09 11:17:26 AM
3. My Biggest Complaint Are the Parents Who Play the "Shy" Card on Behalf of their Children - If we say that our child is "shy," when our child is being quiet or ignoring you, we're just trying to be nice. In reality, it's because you are a scary looking person who children immediately distrust and we don't want to hurt your feelings by telling you that. Please, don't make this about our kid. Instead, ask yourself why that kid doesn't seem to be acting "shy" around other grown-ups, then take a good hard look in the mirror, and remove those giant f***king rubber things from your earlobes because you look like a creepy hipster.

Is this supposed to make me feel bad? I hope your farking kids are terrified of me. In a perfect world, they would run in the opposite direction until they die of exhaustion.

We don't want your damned kids to like us. We want them to be invisible and inaudible, until they are old enough to act like human beings.
 
2013-04-09 11:20:59 AM

CrazyCracka420: Do you realize we humans are breeding at exponential rates,


Human "breeding" rate has been dropping since 1963 and most demographers expect it to naturally go negative in our lifetimes (and that's assuming no disasters push it along). But that's just, you know, documented reality - don't bother to put your latte' down, I know you have to finish it up before heading to the gym in 26 minutes.
 
2013-04-09 11:21:55 AM

chewd: 2. There is no such thing as a non-family restaurant... believe me if there was, i'd go there EXCLUSIVELY.


I learned of this on Fark.
 
2013-04-09 11:25:40 AM

umad: 3. My Biggest Complaint Are the Parents Who Play the "Shy" Card on Behalf of their Children - If we say that our child is "shy," when our child is being quiet or ignoring you, we're just trying to be nice. In reality, it's because you are a scary looking person who children immediately distrust and we don't want to hurt your feelings by telling you that. Please, don't make this about our kid. Instead, ask yourself why that kid doesn't seem to be acting "shy" around other grown-ups, then take a good hard look in the mirror, and remove those giant f***king rubber things from your earlobes because you look like a creepy hipster.

Is this supposed to make me feel bad? I hope your farking kids are terrified of me. In a perfect world, they would run in the opposite direction until they die of exhaustion.

We don't want your damned kids to like us. We want them to be invisible and inaudible, until they are old enough to act like human beings.


No, she is saying that if the kid acts shy, and the parent says he is just shy, don't lecture the parent on how to raise a kid who isn't shy. This doesn't apply to people like you who do not want to interact with the kid, just the ones who crowd a kid, and then act offended when the kid acts frightened or reserved.
 
2013-04-09 11:27:50 AM

umrdyldo: Hero tag needs a bit of Obvious or Sad.  Can't decide which.


The hero tag is just the troll cherry on top of that fail sundae.
 
2013-04-09 11:28:20 AM
Have a 17 month old, so I'm really getting a kick...

1. Parents Post Too Many Photos of Their Children on Their Facebook Walls
No, that's a definite problem in some cases.  A normal parent posts pictures of their kids at a reasonable rate.  A kid gets a plate of spaghetti over every part of their body (except their nose.  How the hell does that always happen?!), funny.  300 pictures of a kid looking at the dog is annoying.  Naked pictures of kids shouldn't be anywhere near facebook, because there are a lot of farked up people online.
2. Control Your Children in Restaurants/2a. The Sheer Mess that Some Kids Make When Out to Eat is Astounding
I hope nobody is dumb enough to take a kid who isn't at least elementary school aged to a moderately nice restaurant.  I'm not talking Applebees, but anything where prices are written as "9.5" for something that costs $9.50.  If you go to Bob Evans and complain about kids, then you're eating at the wrong place.  If you go to Chuck E Cheeses and complain about kids, you are a moron.
3. My Biggest Complaint Are the Parents Who Play the "Shy" Card on Behalf of their Children
Agreed,  My daughter waves at nearly everyone, but there are people she won't.  I could tell them that my daughter thinks they might be looney toons, but I'll refrain and fallback on the shy escape.
(side note:  Why do crazy people like to come up to babies and talk to them?  Wait, no, I don't want to hear the answer.
4. I Hate the "You Don't Understand" Parents
I don't know who I want to punch more here, the blogger or the people who do this.  Yes, some people think that having a pet goldfish named Bill makes them qualified to be parents (and some take that a step further), but parents have to understand that people don't know what having a kid is like until they actually have kids.
5. No One Wants to Watch a Video of Your Child that is Longer than 12 seconds Long
Most people don't have an attention span.  If it's a constant stream of funny, then anything longer is fine with reason.  If you have to wait for the payoff (kid carrying around plate of spaghetti, drops it on dog), then tell people when it happens in the video.

This is actually more a depressing commentary on the state of societal attention spans.
6. I Get Irritated When Parents Blabber on about Being So Busy
In my experience, parenting is like how flying an aircraft in combat has been describes.  2 hours of boredom, followed by 5 minutes of sheer terror.  You can do a lot in those two hours.  Besides, the blogger is right, it's no fun to hang out with single friends who make derisive comments about kids, when all you want to do is make comments about said friend dying alone.
7. I Most Hate That They Fall Into What We Call the "Baby Hole." Why Can't Anyone Get a Damn Babysitter Anymore?
If you have to pay for a babysitter every time that you want to go out, one of two things has occurred.  1)  You have no local relatives/friends who love babies.  I feel bad for you, because that sucks, or 2)  You've made awful choices in life, and consequently nobody wants to deal with you or your kid.
8. I Don't Like When Spouses Start to Call Each Other "Mommy" and "Daddy." That's Just Creepy
Yeah, that actually can get creepy.  Especially when there are no kids around.
9. What Really Annoys Me Is When Parents Yell at their Kids But Never Get Out of Their Chair and Deal with the Kid
You could sit your kid down, and in a stern voice, tell them that their behavior is unacceptable, and they must cease and hahahaha nevermind, that doesn't work with anyone below school age.  No, you get off your ass, pick up your kid, and do whatever it is you need to to keep the kid from being a brat.  Don't beat your kid, no, that will lead to your kid beating their kids, etc.  Just don't be a passive dipshiat.
10. My Biggest Pet Peeve Is 'You Can't Imagine How Tired, Frustrated, Pain, Etc. Unless You've Had a Child
fark no.  People fight fires, build buildings, and jump out of perfectly good airplanes without a kid.  That's dumb.  Blogger should feel dumb.
 
Displayed 50 of 421 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report