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(The Atlantic Wire)   Apparently concerned that he wasn't looking enough like a James Bond/Bruce Lee movie villian, Kim Jong Un views military exercises by the North Korean Army's elite ninja squadrons   (theatlanticwire.com) divider line 70
    More: Amusing, Korean People's Army, North Korea, military exercise, martial artists, squadrons  
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12359 clicks; posted to Main » on 08 Apr 2013 at 12:24 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-04-08 12:26:44 PM  
I can't wait till he announces the All-Styles World Invitational Martial Arts Competition with a solid-gold dragon as the top prize.   Does North Korea HAVE any inactive volcanoes that they can convert into an arena?
 
2013-04-08 12:26:52 PM  
www.toptenreviews.com
 
2013-04-08 12:27:05 PM  
I don't understand why the guy in the third screen animation throws himself on the ground after flipping that dude.
 
2013-04-08 12:28:52 PM  
cdn.theatlanticwire.com

The North Korea People's Army does have us beat in the area of Hats.
 
2013-04-08 12:29:06 PM  

Salmon: I don't understand why the guy in the third screen animation throws himself on the ground after flipping that dude.


big elbow drop... duh
 
2013-04-08 12:29:38 PM  

Salmon: I don't understand why the guy in the third screen animation throws himself on the ground after flipping that dude.


He didn't throw himself. He was thrown by the ninja.
 
2013-04-08 12:29:58 PM  
 
2013-04-08 12:30:06 PM  

Philip Francis Queeg: [cdn.theatlanticwire.com image 614x383]

The North Korea People's Army does have us beat in the area of Hats.


wait... is that a hat or a bowl of water? I think his General is a Kappa
 
2013-04-08 12:30:45 PM  
He's got a young Morrissey thing going on with that haircut.

About a month ago I noticed several young twenty-somethings with that hair.  It must be a thing.

/i sound o
 
2013-04-08 12:31:13 PM  
I'm thinking a rubber dong photoshop.
/no skills
//can't pay the bills.
 
2013-04-08 12:31:19 PM  
Looks like they're doing the "Thriller" dance

/can't imagine who would do the Vincent Price voiceover
 
2013-04-08 12:31:23 PM  

Rapmaster2000: He's got a young Morrissey thing going on with that haircut.

About a month ago I noticed several young twenty-somethings with that hair.  It must be a thing.

/i sound o

ld
 
2013-04-08 12:32:41 PM  
Somebody get this guy a cat to stroke.
 
2013-04-08 12:33:17 PM  
An  evil  cat.
 
2013-04-08 12:34:03 PM  

Philip Francis Queeg: [cdn.theatlanticwire.com image 614x383]

The North Korea People's Army does have us beat in the area of Hats.


i107.photobucket.com
Burt Reynolds hasn't admitted defeat.
 
2013-04-08 12:34:07 PM  

Philip Francis Queeg: The North Korea People's Army does have us beat in the area of Hats.


I came in here to say this. They may not have much, but damn do they have some awesome lids!
 
2013-04-08 12:35:04 PM  

Philip Francis Queeg: [cdn.theatlanticwire.com image 614x383]

The North Korea People's Army does have us beat in the area of Hats.


You tell rank in North Korea by the size of the hat. The smaller the hat, the higher the ranking. Less of a target
 
2013-04-08 12:35:44 PM  
Can we just nuke this ahole yet?
 
2013-04-08 12:35:55 PM  
I'm a little surprised that their brittle, malnourished bones don't break from some of those moves.
 
2013-04-08 12:36:34 PM  
submitter, you idiot, if they were ninjas they wouldn't have been seen

and if you can see a ninja, it's too damn late for you
 
2013-04-08 12:37:16 PM  

Salmon: I don't understand why the guy in the third screen animation throws himself on the ground after flipping that dude.


Probably a soccer player.
 
2013-04-08 12:38:09 PM  
Somebody who's not at work or doesn't care please set the first drill video to music.
 
2013-04-08 12:38:20 PM  

dabbletech: Thrilling!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-mv9Hv9MeXQ


Beat me to it.

/Now, "beat it"
 
2013-04-08 12:40:20 PM  
I love the way the announcer is so excited.  I can just imagine her in the throes of passion
 
2013-04-08 12:46:09 PM  
We're good.
i2.photobucket.com
You can't see Ninja's because they saw Chuck Norris and ran.

/waits for the haters
 
2013-04-08 12:50:28 PM  
Sorry to interject my semi-serious commentary among all the jokes. But I think the kid understands how to lead by fear very well. The body language of the military "generals" in most of the pictures and videos look like they are afraid of him. And they probably are. Maybe he's made examples out of a few of them who crossed a line either visible or invisible. Leading by using fear as a method of power and control can work for a while. I guess sometimes it can work for a long while. It usually doesn't end well though. I like how when he's handling the gun he's pointing in the general direction of a couple of the guys and one of them takes a step back, seeming to be very conscious that the gun is pointing his way. And his eyes follow the gun in Kims hand, as though he might shoot them.
 
2013-04-08 12:51:50 PM  

Old_Chief_Scott: Somebody get this guy a cat to stroke.


  Definitely more Austin Powers than James Bond.
 
2013-04-08 12:55:05 PM  

enik: [www.toptenreviews.com image 300x194]


came for this.  feel free to get the lights.  thread over
 
2013-04-08 12:59:00 PM  
I know a martial arts class full of 11 year-olds that can do all that. Not afraid of them, either.
 
2013-04-08 12:59:09 PM  

joylessFark: I love the way the announcer is so excited.  I can just imagine her in the throes of passion


O'rly?
(headphones...play video)

That was disappointing.  Very disappointing
 
2013-04-08 01:01:03 PM  
You know who else had troops on motorcycles?
 
2013-04-08 01:02:24 PM  
Hard to tell,but it looks like a Tokarev that Lil Fatty's firing.

Just checked,China still makes 'em,not a bad gun (I've fired one) but definitely obsolete by today's standards.
 
2013-04-08 01:03:24 PM  

Crackpipe: I like how when he's handling the gun he's pointing in the general direction of a couple of the guys and one of them takes a step back, seeming to be very conscious that the gun is pointing his way. And his eyes follow the gun in Kims hand, as though he might shoot them.


I'm guessing this has more to do with how he clearly doesn't have much experience with guns. I watch novice gun users to, and it's definitely because I'm afraid they might shoot me.

It's not because they're the divine sons of the God-Emperor.
 
2013-04-08 01:08:10 PM  
Oh. Oh wow.

Has anyone noticed that Big Un seems to be the only one who has any amount of weight to him? I've heard rumors that even the regular army only gets about 700 calories a day to eat, but the average citizen in NK gets around 100 - 200 cals a day (less than the WHO would say constitutes an emergency survival ration)
 
2013-04-08 01:14:24 PM  

hardinparamedic: Oh. Oh wow.

Has anyone noticed that Big Un seems to be the only one who has any amount of weight to him? I've heard rumors that even the regular army only gets about 700 calories a day to eat, but the average citizen in NK gets around 100 - 200 cals a day (less than the WHO would say constitutes an emergency survival ration)


The thing that struck me is that, at the start of the video, he's walking like Norm on Cheers.
 
2013-04-08 01:16:22 PM  
He is building a fighting force of extraordinary magnitude.
 
2013-04-08 01:20:22 PM  
Does he ever do anything without his 80 year old friends.
 
2013-04-08 01:28:01 PM  
Do they not understand that you cannot karate chop a predator drone out of the sky?
 
2013-04-08 01:29:03 PM  
Kim would make a terrible Bond villain. He is too silly, one dimensional and far fetched to be reliably made into a Bond villain
 
2013-04-08 01:31:38 PM  

caddisfly: He is building a fighting force of extraowrdinary magnituwde.


FTFY.

/and damn you for beating me to the punch.
 
2013-04-08 01:33:52 PM  

Dalemite: Do they not understand that you cannot karate chop a predator drone out of the sky?


that first presumes they even know what a predator drone is, something the state prolly isn't really keen on telling them.  I honestly envison the first few minutes of  a war with North Korea to unspool like the beginning of Ralph Bakshi's  Wizards,  especially the part where the Elf army armed with medieval weapons is waiting in the trenches to face the enemy forces, and then  die frozen in slack-jawed fear and disbelief as the enemy shows up using the weapons and tactics of a  WWII Nazi Blitzkrieg
 
2013-04-08 01:45:41 PM  

CleanAndPure: Kim would make a terrible Bond villain. He is too silly, one dimensional and far fetched to be reliably made into a Bond villain


But you never know...he may contact the UN and demand "ONE MILLION DOLLARS!"
 
2013-04-08 01:53:37 PM  

Magorn: Dalemite: Do they not understand that you cannot karate chop a predator drone out of the sky?

that first presumes they even know what a predator drone is, something the state prolly isn't really keen on telling them.  I honestly envison the first few minutes of  a war with North Korea to unspool like the beginning of Ralph Bakshi's  Wizards,  especially the part where the Elf army armed with medieval weapons is waiting in the trenches to face the enemy forces, and then  die frozen in slack-jawed fear and disbelief as the enemy shows up using the weapons and tactics of a  WWII Nazi Blitzkrieg


I'd expect it'll end the same, too. Apparently Jong Un has a brother...
 
2013-04-08 01:55:14 PM  

buckler: CleanAndPure: Kim would make a terrible Bond villain. He is too silly, one dimensional and far fetched to be reliably made into a Bond villain

But you never know...he may contact the UN and demand "ONE MILLION DOLLARS!"


Perhaps Denis Rodman is really his petulant teenage son too.
 
2013-04-08 01:56:34 PM  
So which Kim is more evil?

Kim Big Un or Kim Kardassian.
 
2013-04-08 02:13:32 PM  
fbcdn-sphotos-b-a.akamaihd.net
 
2013-04-08 02:37:49 PM  
I love this guy. He's trying so very, very hard. Someone give him a TFD subscription, webcam, and a kitten and we won't ever have to worry about him again.
 
2013-04-08 03:00:45 PM  

Abe Vigoda's Ghost: Salmon: I don't understand why the guy in the third screen animation throws himself on the ground after flipping that dude.

Probably a soccer player.


slow clap
 
2013-04-08 03:03:49 PM  

hardinparamedic: Oh. Oh wow.

Has anyone noticed that Big Un seems to be the only one who has any amount of weight to him? I've heard rumors that even the regular army only gets about 700 calories a day to eat, but the average citizen in NK gets around 100 - 200 cals a day (less than the WHO would say constitutes an emergency survival ration)


There is one fat general in some of the Un-looking-at-maps pics. I haven't seen him lately, though, so maybe they ate him.
 
2013-04-08 03:06:34 PM  

CleanAndPure: So which Kim is more evil?

Kim Big Un or Kim Kardassian.


So, Kim Big Un or Kim Big Ass?
 
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