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(Wikipedia)   Replace any word or phrase in a well-known literary passage with the phrase "your mom." Example: "Theirs not to reason why, theirs but to do your mom." Voting enabled   ( divider line
    More: Caption, English Wikipedia, phrases, maternal insults, Contests  
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1658 clicks; posted to Main » on 08 Apr 2013 at 12:00 PM (4 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

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2013-04-07 10:36:35 PM  
It was the best of time, your mom was the worst of times.
2013-04-07 11:15:55 PM  
Kilgore: Smell that? You smell that?

Lance: What?

Kilgore: Your mom, son. Nothing else in the world smells like that. I love the smell of your mom in the morning.
2013-04-07 11:46:36 PM  
Two roads diverged in a road, and I, I took the one less traveled by.  Your mom.
2013-04-07 11:48:30 PM  
How lovely it is to do nothing all day, and after having done so, your mom.
2013-04-07 11:52:07 PM  
I felt the lurch and halt of her heart
Next my breast, where my own heart was beating;
And I laughed to feel it plunge and bound,
And strange in my blood-swept ears was the sound
Of the words I kept repeating, your mom, your mom, your mom.
2013-04-08 12:11:23 AM  
Is this a your mom which I see before me,
The [love] handle[s] toward my hand? Come, let me clutch thee.
I have thee not, and yet I see thee still.
Art thou not, fatal vision, sensible
To feeling as to sight? Or art thou but
A mom of the mind, a false creation,
Proceeding from the heat-oppressèd brain?
I see thee yet, in form as palpable
As this which now I draw.
Thou marshall'st me the way that I was going,
And such an instrument I was to use.
2013-04-08 03:36:03 AM  
Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him your mom.
2013-04-08 07:12:29 AM  
This story shall the good man teach his son;And Crispin Crispian shall ne'er go by,From this day to the ending of the world,But we in it shall be remember'd;We few, we happy few, we band of brothers;For he today that sheds his blood with meShall be my brother; be he ne'er so vile,This day shall gentle his condition:And gentlemen in England now a-bedShall think themselves accursed they were not here,And hold their manhoods cheap whiles any speaksThat fought with us upon your Mom
2013-04-08 08:13:56 AM  
"I don't want your mom!"
"Then you should never been born."
2013-04-08 08:32:01 AM  
Kaffee: Colonel Jessup, did you order the Code Red?!
Judge: You don't have to answer that question!
Jessup: I'll answer the question. You want answers?
Kaffee: I think I'm entitled.
Jessup: You want answers?!
Kaffee: I want your mom!
Jessup: You can't handle my mom!
2013-04-08 08:35:23 AM  
And so, my fellow Americans: ask not what your mom can do to you - ask what you can do to your mom.
2013-04-08 08:47:01 AM  
"One of the liberating effects of your mom when I was a teenager was precisely its ability to tune me into all sorts of strange data and make me realize that I wasn't as totally isolated in perceiving the world as being monstrous and crazy"
―William Gibson
2013-04-08 09:14:12 AM  
"I was a child and she was your mom,
 In this kingdom by the sea;
 But we loved with a love which was more than love --
 Your mom and my Annabel Lee."

Edgar Allan Poe
2013-04-08 09:33:56 AM  
Do your mom or do not. There is no try.
2013-04-08 09:45:57 AM  
The face of the Lord is against them that do your mom. - Psalms 34:16
2013-04-08 10:08:45 AM  
A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable but more useful than a life spent doing your mom − George Bernard Shaw
2013-04-08 10:11:35 AM  
Your mom can make you feel inferior without your consent  − Eleanor Roosevelt
2013-04-08 10:16:22 AM  
"If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do your mom today?" - Steve Jobs
2013-04-08 10:47:00 AM  
"Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about your mom."

Albert Einstein
2013-04-08 11:00:06 AM  
"Your mom is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance, you must keep moving."

Albert Einstein
2013-04-08 11:39:47 AM  
"Given the choice between the experience of pain and your mother, I would choose pain."William Faulkner
2013-04-08 11:45:38 AM  
"This is the way the world ends
Not with a bang but with your mom "
2013-04-08 11:52:13 AM  
The girl smiled. Her goat smiled. Her dad smiled. But the car robber did not smile. He said, "your mom."
2013-04-08 12:01:48 PM  
when you're not looking, somebody'll sneak up and write "Your mom" right under your nose.
― J.D. Salinger, The Catcher in the Rye
2013-04-08 12:03:21 PM  
Twas brillig and the slithey toves did your mom in the wabe.
2013-04-08 12:04:34 PM  
Something there is that doesn't love your mom
2013-04-08 12:04:41 PM  
The Big Nurse tends to get real put out if something keeps her outfit from running like a smooth , accurate, precision-made machine. The slightest thing messy or out of kilter or in the way ties her into a little white knot of tight-smiled fury. Your mom walks around with that same doll smile crimpled between her chin and her nose and that same calm whir coming from her eyes, but down inside of her she's tense as steel. I know, I can feel it. And she don't relax a hair until she gets the nuisance attended to - what she calls "adjusted to surroundings."
One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest
Chief Bromden describes Nurse Ratched, a cold and sadistic tyrant, Part 1.
2013-04-08 12:05:12 PM  
It's a shame the throne wasn't made out of cocks, they'd have never your mom off it

/now with voting
2013-04-08 12:05:15 PM  
Friends, Romans, Countrymen, lend me your mom.

/This time with votey goodness.
2013-04-08 12:05:26 PM  
To be your mom, or not to be?  That is the question.
2013-04-08 12:05:37 PM  
"So we beat on, boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly into your mom."

F. Scott Fitzgerald
The Great Gatsby
2013-04-08 12:06:23 PM  
Toto, I've got a feeling we're not in your mom anymore.
2013-04-08 12:06:31 PM  
"I can't do that, Mom."
2013-04-08 12:06:50 PM  
Do not go gentle into your mom,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Though wise men at their end know dark is right,
Because their words had forked no lightning they
Do not go gentle into your mom.

Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright
Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight,
And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way,
Do not go gentle into your mom.

Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight
Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

And you, my father, there on the sad height,
Curse, bless, me now with your fierce tears, I pray.
Do not go gentle into your mom.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
2013-04-08 12:07:26 PM  
A merry little surge of electricity piped by automatic alarm from the mood organ beside your mom awakened Rick Deckard
2013-04-08 12:07:38 PM  
Mr. Gorbachev, tear down your mom.
2013-04-08 12:07:48 PM  
"The man in black fled across the desert, and the gunslinger followed your mom.."
2013-04-08 12:07:51 PM  
Oh freddled gruntbuggly
Thy micturations are to me
As plurdled gabbleblotchits on a lurgid bee.

Groop I implore thee, my foonting turlingdromes.
And hooptiously drangle me with crinkly bindlewurdles,
Or I will rend thy mom in the gobberwarts with my blurglecruncheon,
see if I don't!
2013-04-08 12:08:10 PM  
Cinderella story. Outta nowhere. A former greens-keeper, now, about to become the Masters champion. It looks like a mirac...It's in your mom!
2013-04-08 12:08:28 PM  
Call me mom.
2013-04-08 12:08:34 PM  
I am your mom.
That's not true... that's impossible!
2013-04-08 12:08:35 PM  
I am a friend of Sarah Connor. I was told she was here. Could I see your mom please?
2013-04-08 12:08:45 PM  
Shoot all the bluejays you want, if you can hit 'em, but remember it's a sin to kill your mom. (paraphrased To Kill A Mockingbird)
2013-04-08 12:08:55 PM  
Your mom laughed.

/ Who is Your Mom?
// Your mom . . .now with voting goodness
2013-04-08 12:09:07 PM  
I've read this twice, and I think it still mostly makes sense...

To be, or not to be--that is the question:
Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer
The slings and arrows of your mom
Or to take arms against her
And by opposing end them. To die, to sleep with your mom--
No more--and by a sleep to say we end
Her heartache, and the thousand natural shocks
Her flesh is heir to. 'Tis a consummation
Devoutly to be wished. To die, to sleep--
To sleep--perchance to dream: ay, there's the rub,
For in your mom's bed what dreams may come
When we have shuffled off this mortal coil,
Must give us pause. There's the respect
That makes calamity of so long life.
For she would bear the whips and chains of BDSM,
Th' oppressor's dildo, the proud man's contumely
The pangs of despised love, the Master's delay,
The insolence of disgust, and the spurns
That patient merit of th' unworthy takes,
When she herself might my coitus make
With a bare bodkin? Who would fardels bear,
To grunt and sweat under your mom,
But that the dread of something after her,
The undiscovered country, from whose loins
No penis returns, puzzles the will,
And makes us rather bear your mom,
Than fly to others that we know not of?
Her countenance does make cowards of us all,
And thus the pasty hue of her skin
Is sicklied o'er with the pale cast of thought,
And enterprise of great pitch and moment
With this regard their currents turn awry
And lose the name of action. -- Soft you now,
The fair your mom! -- Nymph, in thy orisons
Be all my sins remembered.
2013-04-08 12:09:11 PM  
Call me your mom.
2013-04-08 12:09:31 PM  
"Luke, I am your mom".
2013-04-08 12:09:51 PM  
I saw the best minds of my generation destroyed by
Your mom, starving hysterical naked,
dragging themselves through the negro streets at dawn
looking for an angry fix
2013-04-08 12:10:13 PM  
Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage
And then is heard no more: it is a tale
Told by your mom, full of sound and fury,
Signifying nothing.

MACBETH, Act 5, Scene 5
2013-04-08 12:10:13 PM  
Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, your mom walks into mine.
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