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(Daily Mail)   "She had been starving after spending two weeks in the wild when she devised an innovative way to catch fish using her private parts as bait and then trapping her meal between her legs"   (dailymail.co.uk) divider line 23
    More: Scary, survival skills, nude  
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33398 clicks; posted to Main » on 05 Apr 2013 at 7:55 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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Archived thread
2013-04-05 08:23:25 PM
10 votes:
FTFA: "Survivors: 'Naked and Afraid' participants Alison Teal-Blehert Koehn and Jonathan Klay found clothing"

Uh-huh. Yeah, they just happened to "find" clothing that just *happens* to look like the stereotypical caveman / wildman clothing, Little-known fact, every desert island comes pre-stocked with a caveman / wildman wardrobe, complete with lopsided dress designed to show off some leg and get the male viewers switched over.

img818.imageshack.us
Except no, they didn't, you lying sacks of shiat. The producers handed them clothing and said "Here, pretend you found this."

/I despise reality TV. There is nothing real about it -- every scene is carefully set up, every "argument" is carefully teased out by a series of leading questions that are edited out of the aired footage, and every single thing about it could not be more fake if they tried.
2013-04-05 08:25:13 PM
3 votes:
Makes sense, many women use their between-legs as a meal ticket.
2013-04-05 06:55:49 PM
3 votes:
I think I would just raid the catering truck for the audio, cam ops, grips, editors and location mixers.
2013-04-05 09:06:03 PM
2 votes:
Does anyone else remember when the history channel focused on history, discovery channel on science, and A&e on the arts?

This shiat is retarded.
2013-04-05 08:39:40 PM
2 votes:

gweilo8888: FTFA: "Survivors: 'Naked and Afraid' participants Alison Teal-Blehert Koehn and Jonathan Klay found clothing"

Uh-huh. Yeah, they just happened to "find" clothing that just *happens* to look like the stereotypical caveman / wildman clothing, Little-known fact, every desert island comes pre-stocked with a caveman / wildman wardrobe, complete with lopsided dress designed to show off some leg and get the male viewers switched over.


Except no, they didn't, you lying sacks of shiat. The producers handed them clothing and said "Here, pretend you found this."

/I despise reality TV. There is nothing real about it -- every scene is carefully set up, every "argument" is carefully teased out by a series of leading questions that are edited out of the aired footage, and every single thing about it could not be more fake if they tried.


That's why I think we should have acual reality TV. Think "Battle Royal" meets Survivor meets Mad Max. Pretty much dump a bunch of death row convicts in the middle of nowhere, tell them that they have to survive and that the last one remaining gets a pardon, and film what happens.
/am I a sociopath for thinking that Jerry Sandusky getting shot with a crossbow would be hilarious?
2013-04-05 08:04:43 PM
2 votes:

Honest Bender: Is that why your lady parts always smell so fishy?


Also, you're sleeping with the wrong kind if this is a regular phenomenon. Clean and healthy women don't smell fishy.
2013-04-05 08:03:02 PM
2 votes:

Nadie_AZ: Stafford, who brings no food, water, clothes, weapons or tools, will have to find and make his own using his bare hands in order to survive during his 60 days on the island.

That first picture shows a steel knife in his hands. That's huge.

Interesting idea, however. And she looks better in subsequent pictures.


She looks so much better in the other pictures that you'd almost think she was a completely different person.

They're talking about 3 different shows. The Stafford guy isn't pictured at all. The first picture is from a different show, the other pictures are from a third show.
2013-04-05 06:10:06 PM
2 votes:
After hours in the water, she came back to camp with a big red snapper.
2013-04-05 06:06:55 PM
2 votes:
'Survival shows are so common now that it's gotten more and more difficult to convince the audience that what they're watching is something extreme.  Having no clothes just takes it to the next level. It's the ultimate test and makes survival exponentially more difficult.'

Next season:  "Survival of the Handicapped"
2013-04-06 08:16:56 AM
1 votes:
So "If it smells like fish, take the dish" works on fish as well?
2013-04-06 07:09:38 AM
1 votes:
At what point do people at the Discovery Channel start getting embarrassed about what they're programming?

//History Channel, too.
2013-04-06 04:25:57 AM
1 votes:
I got an idea.

Take an ordinary guy no training whatsoever, and throw him in the amazon/desert/whatever. Don't even pretend the production crew isn't there to bail him out. Make a survival show out of this guy LEARNING and putting into practice all the shiat the production team already knows. They'd tell him stuff, he'd have a consultant telling him how to survive, but in the end he'd be the one actually doing all the survival stuff. And actually DOING IT, not staying in a hotel between shootings.

Maybe even make a game show out of it, and they win a prize if they go a full week without giving up or getting injured. Call it the $10,000 Survival Challenge.

I'd watch it. Hell, I'd go on it.
2013-04-06 01:59:38 AM
1 votes:

AAlumni: There are three atolls in the Maldives that are commonly referred to as "Funadhoo":  Kaafu, Baa, and Shaviyani. Confusing, I know. But the island they're on may be uninhabited.


Kaafu, Baa, and Shaviyani are all populated, according to Wikipedia and other sources. And even if they're on an uninhabited island in one of those atolls, the fact remains that they are absolutely surrounded by inhabited atolls, many of them covered in tourists. It is by no stretch of the imagination remote.

As for the "uninhabited" Olorua Island (where Naked Castaway takes place), btw, it's just ten miles from the nearest Panoramio photo, on the inhabited Komo Island. There are at least three other populated islands within less than 20 miles of Olorua. Again, it is hardly remote.  And I don't believe for one second the guy in that programwas alone and unaided, either.

"There were eight feral goats on the island,"  he says in another Daily Fail  press release "article". And he goes on to say the only water on this 0.36 x 0.5 mile island (area approximately 0.1 - 0.15 square miles courtesy of Photoshop's analysis tool) was a "wet rock" from which he could collect one drop of water every 45 seconds. That's 14 days to get one gallon of water, based on 15,140 drips per gallon. (He claims he had to live off coconuts until it rained; of course, goats can't open coconuts.)

Yet an adult goat needs on average 1.75 gallons of water per day, and if you assume half that for the kids, that's 10.5 gallons the goats need every day to survive, or 147 times what was available to them before he arrived and started drinking it. So either he's lying about the availability of water, or he's lying about them being feral goats, when they were placed there specifically to give him a food source.

Or more likely, he's lying about both.

These programs are completely fictitious, and I'm amazed after the Bear Grylls exposés that anybody falls for this shiat any more.
2013-04-05 11:39:12 PM
1 votes:
yep, that's how the last cougar got me, too
2013-04-05 11:06:08 PM
1 votes:
cdn.chud.com
2013-04-05 10:34:42 PM
1 votes:

WhippingBoy: BlippityBleep: what, did she just decide out of the blue to be like 'hey i'm going to just put my lady bits out for show and maybe the fish will like it?'

Women logic. This is the one in a billion circumstance when it actually worked.


I don't know about that. That same logic has trapped me and countless other men, time after time.
And no matter how often we escape, we fall for the same bait, time after time.
2013-04-05 09:51:29 PM
1 votes:
At this rate, I fully expect we will see some version of "The Running Man" hit television in our lifetime.
2013-04-05 09:31:13 PM
1 votes:

Quantum Apostrophe: Makes sense, many women use their between-legs as a meal ticket.


since the dawn of time. old news is well, you know...
2013-04-05 08:59:33 PM
1 votes:
this really isn't news.
Most women know that if they are in a really tight spot and starving all they have to do is open their legs and something will swim by and feed them.
2013-04-05 08:23:46 PM
1 votes:

Nadie_AZ: Stafford, who brings no food, water, clothes, weapons or tools, will have to find and make his own using his bare hands in order to survive during his 60 days on the island.

That first picture shows a steel knife in his hands. That's huge.


You're right, of course, and the Ed Stafford show proves it. I haven't read the article but I have seen the one with the 60 days on an island thing.
He used a shell from a clam to use as a cutting utensil. And it seemed really hard going when he tried to cut down a small tree.

The show itself I have reservations with. Yes, he doesn't bring anything onto the island apart from a camera - and provisions for its use via drop offs from the crew once a week ie batteries etc - really, I think even a dickhead like me without true survival experience but have seen enough tv shows to know how to survive would have made it without too much hassle. In the show, it took Ed 3 or 4 days before he even got a fire going. He failed and left it after previous attempts. That's bullshiat. For a guy who had walked the length of the Amazon, and used to be in the army or something, I kinda expect the fire to be up and running after a few hours of arriving. As for water, he made no attempt to look further into the island for supplies until after a week or so and soley relied on a piddling 'stream' of water coming down a wall.  This is after he saw some wild goats on the island.

Basically, don;t be fooled by what these programs are proclaiming to be. These guys know exactly what to do but will not do it because of the television factor.
2013-04-05 08:02:47 PM
1 votes:
i.imgur.com
i.imgur.com
2013-04-05 08:00:11 PM
1 votes:
"Great.  Now I'll never get the smell out."
2013-04-05 07:27:32 PM
1 votes:
The rock and pool
is nice and cool
so juicy sweet.
Our only wish
to catch a fish
so juicy sweet!
 
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