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(Slate)   Stop me if you've heard this one before: There's a new Apple-killer about to hit the market. No, I'm serious   (slate.com) divider line 154
    More: Unlikely, killer, Facebook, jujutsu  
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20395 clicks; posted to Main » on 05 Apr 2013 at 1:51 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



154 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-04-05 11:57:08 AM  
The Swiss have had one for centuries.
www.fjbejjaniphd.com
 
2013-04-05 12:02:05 PM  
You can flip through the pictures, Like them, and even comment on things without ever unlocking your device.

Well, that sounds safe.

i.imgur.com
 
2013-04-05 12:34:59 PM  
People still use Facebook?
 
2013-04-05 12:35:51 PM  
A facebook phone is about the last thing I'd want.

I am already trying to decided if I can live without facebook, a phone that automagically hooks me into it sounds farking sweet.
 
2013-04-05 01:41:26 PM  
 
2013-04-05 01:52:42 PM  
I've killed apples for years. They're damn tasty, and a good ingredient for sweet strudels.
 
2013-04-05 01:56:03 PM  
Dafuq? No effing thank you.
 
2013-04-05 01:56:22 PM  
wow, Now THAT's a headline.
 
2013-04-05 01:56:35 PM  
if they make it MORE expensive than Apple AND less functional, hipsters will rush to it.
 
2013-04-05 01:56:55 PM  
Holding out for TwitterPhone.
 
2013-04-05 01:59:30 PM  

CygnusDarius: I've killed apples for years. They're damn tasty, and a good ingredient for sweet strudels.


Wot? You don't scrump? poofter.
 
2013-04-05 01:59:49 PM  
So it takes over your system and inserts itself into all of your other programs while strategically placing ads?

Sounds great, but I already have Bonzi Buddy installed so I have that whole package covered.
 
2013-04-05 01:59:55 PM  
You'll "drive" a..."friend" to the aborotion clinic and suddenly you'll have ads for baby care products all over your phone.
 
2013-04-05 02:00:30 PM  
Casoron (dichlobenil)
Poast (sethoxydim)
Devrinol (napropamide)
Prowl (pendemethalin)
Fusilade (fluazifop)
Roundup (glyphosate)
Goal (oxyfluorfen)
Princep (simazine)
Karmex (diuron)
Solicam (norflurazon)
Kerb (pronomide)
Surflan (oryzalin)
Bueno 6 (MSMA)
Envy (2,4D)
Paraquat (paraquat CL)

Do we really need another one?
 
2013-04-05 02:01:44 PM  
facebook's website & mobile app are annoying. 24-hour front-of-my-phone facebook??

mobilesyrup.com
farm4.staticflickr.com
 
2013-04-05 02:04:41 PM  

dryknife: Holding out for TwitterPhone.


I'm holding out for the Fark phone.
 
2013-04-05 02:05:38 PM  

litespeed74: dryknife: Holding out for TwitterPhone.

I'm holding out for the Fark phone.


No way, man.  Fark gets haxx0rd by p1g5 at least once a year.
 
2013-04-05 02:05:50 PM  
Wow I thought Apple/Mac was dead technology years ago. I never bought into the fad.
 
2013-04-05 02:06:00 PM  
Someone came out with a Facebook-centric phone a couple of years ago, never heard a peep from it after the initial promo.

Like every other non-Apple phone, it's a niche product.
 
2013-04-05 02:06:28 PM  
As long as it has a dial, I can use it.
 
2013-04-05 02:08:35 PM  
One day there's going to be a company that absolutely destroys Apple.

It's going to be named Apple.
 
2013-04-05 02:09:14 PM  

EatHam: You can flip through the pictures, Like them, and even comment on things without ever unlocking your device.

Well, that sounds safe.

[i.imgur.com image 247x204]


Yeah that sounds like a disaster. They must have some kind of pass code or something, right? I hope this guy is mistaken about that "feature".
 
2013-04-05 02:09:40 PM  
1. Nothing will ever "kill" Apple because even though it's just a mediocre-to-good smart phone, the brand loyalty will never go away.

2. Facebook sucks and I don't want it on my phone.
 
2013-04-05 02:09:52 PM  
I expected a story another some sort of weed killer that's also fatal to apple trees.
 
2013-04-05 02:10:16 PM  
I'm going to hold out until the assbook phone comes out.
 
2013-04-05 02:11:37 PM  
Just the other day I was thinking to myself, "You know Google's ecosystem isn't invasive enough for my tastes, I want something better."
 
2013-04-05 02:13:39 PM  
2009 is going to be so thrilled to hear about this!
 
2013-04-05 02:13:54 PM  
Article headline "I Like It, but I Don't Like It Like It" ... I stopped there. I can't stand when people talk like this. It's just inarticulate. Why not just click, whistle, grunt and then look at me like I'm supposed to know what the fark you are saying.

Also, can we have a ceremony for the word "literally"? Something similar to when the N word was buried, except let's really mean it this time. How many times have we heard, "I literally died!"? (from someone who didn't... unfortunately)
 
2013-04-05 02:13:56 PM  
F*ck these stupid phones.  Pick your head up and say "hi" to the person next to you.  See what happens.  I mean, if you're on a subway in a bad neighborhood you might die or get mugged, but isn't that how a good story always starts?
 
2013-04-05 02:14:21 PM  

uttertosh: CygnusDarius: I've killed apples for years. They're damn tasty, and a good ingredient for sweet strudels.

Wot? You don't scrump? poofter.


3.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-04-05 02:16:23 PM  
Apple killer
qu'est que c'est?
Run run
run run awaayyy

/obscure
 
2013-04-05 02:17:09 PM  

Nana's Vibrator: F*ck these stupid phones.  Pick your head up and say "hi" to the person next to you.  See what happens.  I mean, if you're on a subway in a bad neighborhood you might die or get mugged, but isn't that how a good story always starts?


If you die, that's how a good story starts for the other guy.
 
2013-04-05 02:17:24 PM  

bighairyguy: Someone came out with a Facebook-centric phone a couple of years ago, never heard a peep from it after the initial promo.

Like every other non-Apple phone, it's a niche product.


The sheeple have spoken!
 
2013-04-05 02:18:44 PM  

bighairyguy: Someone came out with a Facebook-centric phone a couple of years ago, never heard a peep from it after the initial promo.

Like every other non-Apple phone, it's a niche product.


yup... Any picture you took would be automatically posted to facebook. I saw a commercial for it once and never heard of it again.
 
2013-04-05 02:19:13 PM  
If anything, it's an Android killer.
 
2013-04-05 02:22:01 PM  

sleeper2995: Wow I thought Apple/Mac was dead technology years ago. I never bought into the fad.


WinoRhino: 1. Nothing will ever "kill" Apple because even though it's just a mediocre-to-good smart phone, the brand loyalty will never go away.


"The Anti-Apple Fanboy Squad" is here to save us from things they don't like.


 
2013-04-05 02:23:13 PM  
These are the people that gave us that crap Facebook app, which has consistently been the most unstable app on my phones.  They're going to make a home screen replacement?

This isn't Facebook Home.  This is Facebook LAG.

Facebook home is the best thing that can happen for Apple. It'll give Android users the type of laggy and force closey experience that drives people to buy iPhones.

Facebook is making my phone suck = My phone sucks = buy an iPhone.

slashy/ pre-ordered a G1, currently on my 5th Android phone, and I use an iPhone 4 as a company phone
 
2013-04-05 02:23:19 PM  
I don't have a Facebook account, and no, I would not want something like this installed on *my* phone but with that being said I can see this idea really taking off because, it appears to me, there are just that many people who are truly addicted to "Facebooking". And let's face it; if you're an avid "Facebooker" you don't give a crap about your personal, online, privacy.
 
2013-04-05 02:23:34 PM  
a FarkFone would be amazing!

Dedicated BIE/EIP buttons. A low-drain vibrating option for long sessions. A speech-to-text app specially tuned for herpaderp mutterings, and a super zoom function for those lululemon threads.
 
2013-04-05 02:24:06 PM  
The real Apple iPhone killer is the toilet.
3.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-04-05 02:24:19 PM  
I thought Apple was the Apple killer.
 
2013-04-05 02:24:39 PM  

AbbeySomeone: /obscure


How are the Talking Heads obscure?
 
2013-04-05 02:25:03 PM  
Isn't it pretty well established that Facebook is dying out? Everyone I know has had their fill of it.

I don't expect them to disappear or anything, but I expect their active user base to shrink like crazy in the next couple of years, which will kill their advertising revenue.

It was a fad, like all the other social networking sites. Hopefully, it's the FINAL social networking site.
 
2013-04-05 02:25:57 PM  

Bill_Wick's_Friend: So it takes over your system and inserts itself into all of your other programs while strategically placing ads?

Sounds great, but I already have Bonzi Buddy installed so I have that whole package covered.


You at least set it to Parrot buddy mode right?
 
2013-04-05 02:27:22 PM  

realmolo: Isn't it pretty well established that Facebook is dying out? Everyone I know has had their fill of it.

I don't expect them to disappear or anything, but I expect their active user base to shrink like crazy in the next couple of years, which will kill their advertising revenue.

It was a fad, like all the other social networking sites. Hopefully, it's the FINAL social networking site.


Social networking is absolutely here to stay.  Facebook may go away, but only when something better comes along to replace it.  Nobody really likes it, but nobody is running away either because where are you going to go?  If all your friends and family are still on FB, you're stuck.
 
2013-04-05 02:29:43 PM  

pedobearapproved: "The Anti-Apple Fanboy Squad" is here to save us from things they don't like.


How in the world did you interpret that as being anti-apple fanboi? The iphone is, in fact, a mediocre-to-good smart phone that has a very loyal following. Apple won't vanish from the phone market because it has a decent device and a lot of people who like it, REALLY really like it. But somehow because I didn't kiss it's ass and call it Jesus I was disrespecting it?
 
2013-04-05 02:31:15 PM  
You guys, you overlook the fact that a new word has entered the lexicon: Facebookier.
 
2013-04-05 02:32:04 PM  
Abe Vigoda's Ghost:
If you die, that's how a good story starts for the other guy.

And everyone else on the train.  but boy, what a story!
 
2013-04-05 02:32:30 PM  
i.imgur.com

How can this phone fail?
 
2013-04-05 02:33:19 PM  
The Apple killer will be released by Apple, All this has happened before. All this will happen again.
 
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