FARK.com: (7684511) Bank of America introduces new ATM, allowing you to be virtually screwed by a teller

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		Bank of America introduces new ATM, allowing you to be virtually screwed by a teller (bucks.blogs.nytimes.com)		48
		More: Interesting, Bank of America, call centers

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3962 clicks; posted to Business » on 05 Apr 2013 at 1:56 PM | Favorite | share:

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48 Comments (+0 »)

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Demetrius		2013-04-05 11:29:46 AM

I have no interest in going ATM with BoA.

Pud		2013-04-05 11:41:21 AM

the bank's on-screen tellers are sitting in call centers in Florida and Delaware.

At least they are not outsourcing that part of it.

/Holy crap, did I just actually just say something good about BoA? I don't know if there is a shower hot enough to wash that away.

sammyk		2013-04-05 11:47:33 AM

What a great idea. Now I can stand behind the dipwads too stoopid to use a teller even longer as they chit chat with the lady on the video screen.

How can it possibly take longer than 90 seconds to get money out of the magic cash box?

Tigger		2013-04-05 12:09:38 PM

Will you be able to launder billions of dollars of drug money at these machines?

Gecko Gingrich		2013-04-05 12:19:45 PM

The SECUMD branch in the Parole Town Center in Annapolis has had these for a few years now.

Kingly Weevil		2013-04-05 01:32:53 PM

I guess I sort of get that this is supposed to be easier, but it's like when they "upgraded" pretty much every tech support line to make you talk to it, instead of just pushing 1-2-5-2-4 Or whatever you need to dial to get the department you want.

vernonFL		2013-04-05 02:02:23 PM

New ATM?

Lost Thought 00		2013-04-05 02:05:42 PM

Are there really people who can't manage to work an ATM by themselves?

fuhfuhfuh		2013-04-05 02:13:29 PM

"Thanking you for using Bank of America teller machine, my name is Hadjuki... er, Steve. How may I be of helping for you today?"

ltdanman44		2013-04-05 02:19:18 PM

BoA ATM *ding* A teller will now assist you in this transaction.

/$4.95 service fee applies

nmemkha		2013-04-05 02:28:01 PM

Lawsuits coming soon

Lord Dimwit		2013-04-05 02:42:32 PM

The first thing I thought of was an ATM like those horrible "virtual blackjack" things that are popping up in casinos now. Oh, how I loathe those things.

MrEricSir		2013-04-05 02:53:34 PM

Obscure?

SurfaceTension		2013-04-05 03:00:14 PM

Demetrius: I have no interest in going ATM with BoA.

If you were interested, I'm sure you'd pay a fee for the pleasure.

SurfaceTension		2013-04-05 03:02:10 PM

I don't know about anyone else, but I REALLY don't want the other people standing in line to listen as I conduct my financial transactions with a "virtual teller." Just let me punch the keys and maintain my privacy. Thanks.

Jackie Onanist		2013-04-05 03:12:33 PM

Pffft. Camgirls have been doing that for years.

sethstorm		2013-04-05 03:14:28 PM

No thank you. I'd be fine with a green-screen.

/Pud: the bank's on-screen tellers are sitting in call centers in Florida and Delaware.

At least they are not outsourcing that part of it.

/Holy crap, did I just actually just say something good about BoA? I don't know if there is a shower hot enough to wash that away.

You sure that's a good thing that they're in Florida given the reputation of it here?

MikeyFuccon		2013-04-05 03:54:58 PM

Isn't reducing human labour costs the whole point of ATMs? How does this make any business sense?

/seriously

BarkingUnicorn		2013-04-05 03:57:55 PM

This will cut BoA's health insurance costs, as tellers won't be exposed to diseased customers.

diaphoresis		2013-04-05 04:01:28 PM

/OBLIG

IrateShadow		2013-04-05 04:08:55 PM

MikeyFuccon: Isn't reducing human labour costs the whole point of ATMs? How does this make any business sense?

/seriously

It's probably a test program for making bank teller like those self-service lines at the grocery store. The plan is to reduce future staffing by having one person watch over a number of transactions at once while people mostly take of things themselves.

diaphoresis		2013-04-05 04:12:32 PM

Tigger: Will you be able to launder billions of dollars of drug money at these machines?

of course not.. that's what construction companies, casinos, and real estate agents are for....

BarkingUnicorn		2013-04-05 04:37:38 PM

IrateShadow: MikeyFuccon: Isn't reducing human labour costs the whole point of ATMs? How does this make any business sense?

/seriously

It's probably a test program for making bank teller like those self-service lines at the grocery store. The plan is to reduce future staffing by having one person watch over a number of transactions at once while people mostly take of things themselves.

The plan is the same as the original business model: get people addicted to the service, then charge for it.

Gunny Walker		2013-04-05 04:37:53 PM

Is this the party game version of chat roulette?

DarkSoulNoHope		2013-04-05 04:55:31 PM

MrEricSir: [img46.imageshack.us image 800x305]

Obscure?

It is to me, what is it from?

IncessantHooting		2013-04-05 05:01:23 PM

B of A? I wonder what the fee will be for this.

natazha		2013-04-05 05:04:22 PM

Back in the early 90's, Wells Fargo's marketing wackos wanted real-time video to the ATMs so people could apply for home loans while standing in the rain. I was working in their IT department at the time and we had great fun coming up with a budget. Back then, most ATMs had a 9600 baud connection to the bank.

moefuggenbrew		2013-04-05 05:10:58 PM

ATM that gives you money for free in Spain
Link

seancakes		2013-04-05 05:14:05 PM

DarkSoulNoHope: MrEricSir: [img46.imageshack.us image 800x305]

Obscure?

It is to me, what is it from?

Eerie, Indiana

MrEricSir		2013-04-05 05:33:26 PM

seancakes: DarkSoulNoHope: MrEricSir: [img46.imageshack.us image 800x305]

Obscure?

It is to me, what is it from?

Eerie, Indiana

We have a winner!

RandomExcess		2013-04-05 05:43:55 PM

Never liked those automatic ATM machines.

Stile4aly		2013-04-05 06:39:41 PM

RandomExcess: Never liked those automatic ATM machines.

They're perfectly safe as long as you use your personal PIN number.

Ego edo infantia cattus		2013-04-05 06:53:55 PM

I cant let you withdraw that Dave.

Tenatra		2013-04-05 06:56:41 PM

I have always felt like the tellers inside any given bank are watching me while I'm at an ATM

On a side note -
I just left BoA. I've banked with them for around 5 years now and didn't have any problem until last month. I found out that some of the area BoA branches just sold off to a regional bank. I found out in an Email sent to me that in June I will no longer be a BoA customer (I will become a First State Community Bank customer). Also through BoA I had free checking and no card limits. Through FSCB I will be charged around $100/yr just to have the second tier checking account open but they also have low debit card limits. A daily $500 point of sale limit/$300 atm withdrawal limit. The bottom tier is free checking (but no debit card).

Mad_Radhu		2013-04-05 08:16:08 PM

Darn, I was hoping for a new ATM machine:

www.sync-blog.com

sirrerun		2013-04-05 09:46:57 PM

diaphoresis: Tigger: Will you be able to launder billions of dollars of drug money at these machines?

of course not.. that's what construction companies, casinos, and real estate agents are for....

Um, this is not your father's bank.

SN1987a goes boom		2013-04-05 09:51:46 PM

Mad_Radhu: Darn, I was hoping for a new ATM machine:

[www.sync-blog.com image 600x247]

What ah...what am I looking at here?

picturescrazy		2013-04-05 10:40:26 PM

MrEricSir		2013-04-05 11:05:38 PM

Mad_Radhu: Darn, I was hoping for a new ATM machine:

[www.sync-blog.com image 600x247]

Worst. Fleshlight. Ever.

Vlad_the_Inaner		2013-04-05 11:07:27 PM

Mad_Radhu: Darn, I was hoping for a new ATM machine:

[www.sync-blog.com image 600x247]

Imagine my surprise when I discover that device was only used to reproduce singing

wildcardjack		2013-04-06 12:12:00 AM

Pud: the bank's on-screen tellers are sitting in call centers in Florida and Delaware.

At least they are not outsourcing that part of it.

/Holy crap, did I just actually just say something good about BoA? I don't know if there is a shower hot enough to wash that away.

Yet. Although lots of Americans trust Indian firms like Brickwork to supply "virtual" PA's more reliable than having one directly employed.

Well, at least they aren't going the Chase route with an office every hundred yards. You know they have to get that money from you eventually.

MurphyMurphy		2013-04-06 12:18:08 AM

If I'm going to have a virtual teller, can I have one of these?

themovieblog.com

or maybe one of these that changes depending on my account balance?

unrealityshout.com

"Funds not available."

/maybe there will even be a forget button so those of us who wish can forget what our account balance was.

TheSpaceAdmiral		2013-04-06 12:41:03 AM

intergalactic characters on "Star Trek"

I can't think of a single instance of intergalactic characters on Star Trek. I'm sure someone nerdier than me will point out an exception, but I think it's safe to say 99.9% of characters in Star Trek were from our galaxy.

This is pretty much the worst editing mistake in the history of civilization.

Cthulhu_is_my_homeboy		2013-04-06 04:10:14 AM

The new standard in customer service: our Automated Assistant Machine, or A2M

KrispyKritter		2013-04-06 06:55:40 AM

Lost Thought 00: Are there really people who can't manage to work an ATM by themselves?

my guess, the ever growing senior citizen population.

Stile4aly		2013-04-06 02:29:46 PM

MurphyMurphy: If I'm going to have a virtual teller, can I have one of these?

[themovieblog.com image 440x230]

or maybe one of these that changes depending on my account balance?

[unrealityshout.com image 460x332]
"Funds not available."

/maybe there will even be a forget button so those of us who wish can forget what our account balance was.

Your account is overdrawn. BAD BOY, TIMMY!

lordargent		2013-04-06 05:59:49 PM

Demetrius : I have no interest in going ATM with BoA.

Some people can only get up to $300 from ATMs, but some people get a $500 limit.

saturn badger		2013-04-07 05:35:32 PM

KrispyKritter: Lost Thought 00: Are there really people who can't manage to work an ATM by themselves?

my guess, the ever growing senior citizen population.

Except the ever growing population grew up using these machines.

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