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(Today)   Latest from entitled, butthurt, college-rejected high schooler whose open letter was posted by the Wall Street Journal: "It's a satire"   (todaynews.today.com) divider line 207
    More: Followup, Wall Street Journal, Savannah Guthrie, holistic approaches  
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11861 clicks; posted to Main » on 04 Apr 2013 at 6:39 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-04-04 06:56:29 PM

SN1987a goes boom: A Shambling Mound: ModernLuddite: thamike: God Is My Co-Pirate: sentex: tnpir: Tigger: yeah, that's convincing

"It was satire"

"It was my wife typing"

"I was in the marine core"

"the cheese stands alone"

"I want to spend more time with my family"

"I was undercover for a story on prostitution"

"It's a slippery slope"

"I swear to God she was dead when I got here"

"My junk is stuck in the slats of my chair"

"She said she was 18."


"My Twitter got hacked."
 
2013-04-04 06:56:40 PM
"I was just trying to push the sheep over the fence"
 
2013-04-04 06:56:46 PM
I wondered if she would go this route.

I actually wondered if she didn't actually intend it as commentary on her own generation, because, let's face it, it was pretty out there.

I would only be convinced, however, if she had actually been accpeted at the schools she applied for.
 
2013-04-04 06:57:14 PM

Debeo Summa Credo: "It was satire"

"It was my wife typing"

"I was in the marine core"

"the cheese stands alone"

"I want to spend more time with my family"

"I was undercover for a story on prostitution"

"It's a slippery slope"

"I swear to God she was dead when I got here"

"My junk is stuck in the slats of my chair"

"She said she was 18."

"I was just giving that prostitute a ride, officer.."

"I have a wide stance."


"I never inhaled"
 
2013-04-04 06:58:24 PM

Lusiphur: In order to be a satire, it would need to be satirizing something. So she's either satirizing herself and her own generation, or she's satirizing the admissions process. The first is suspect because most people of her generation don't feel the need to go on long, bitter rants about affirmative action. In fact, her (and technically my) generation is the most diverse and accepting of diversity ever. If she's satirizing the admissions process, it would seem to me to have been far more effective if done from the perspective of an admissions officer.

I just don't buy the "satire" bit. It sounds more like someone who really sucks at life and is bitter about it, but threw in a line or two at the end to give herself plausible deniability if it went the wrong way.


Our generation should go on long rants about the racist practice known as affirmative action, but they're suckers.
 
2013-04-04 06:58:28 PM

Yogimus: Debeo Summa Credo: "It was satire"

"It was my wife typing"

"I was in the marine core"

"the cheese stands alone"

"I want to spend more time with my family"

"I was undercover for a story on prostitution"

"It's a slippery slope"

"I swear to God she was dead when I got here"

"My junk is stuck in the slats of my chair"

"She said she was 18."

"I was just giving that prostitute a ride, officer.."

"I have a wide stance."

"I never inhaled"


"I was hiking the Appalachian Trail."
 
2013-04-04 06:59:09 PM
I really don't know how she could've mad it any more clear she was kidding, and ultimately being self-effacing in her original letter.

People calling her names, and wagging their fingers at her (looking at you here, Gawker) are comically stupid, reactionary twats.
 
2013-04-04 07:00:23 PM
www.blindfiveyearold.com
 
2013-04-04 07:00:40 PM

jvl: But it was an attempt to be funny. If you didn't get that, you might just be dumber than a rock.


Sarcasm would be better description than satire.  But yeah, it was a hilarious troll of a lot of clueless people who are going to continue to be clueless.
 
2013-04-04 07:01:20 PM

Debeo Summa Credo: Somaticasual: SN1987a goes boom: A Shambling Mound: ModernLuddite: thamike: God Is My Co-Pirate: sentex: tnpir: Tigger: yeah, that's convincing

"It was satire"

"It was my wife typing"

"I was in the marine core"

"the cheese stands alone"

"I want to spend more time with my family"

"I was undercover for a story on prostitution"

"It's a slippery slope"

"I swear to God she was dead when I got here"

"My junk is stuck in the slats of my chair"

"She said she was 18."

"I was just giving that prostitute a ride, officer.."

"I have a wide stance."


"Exhaustion"
 
2013-04-04 07:01:22 PM

LordOfThePings: Yogimus: Debeo Summa Credo: "It was satire"

"It was my wife typing"

"I was in the marine core"

"the cheese stands alone"

"I want to spend more time with my family"

"I was undercover for a story on prostitution"

"It's a slippery slope"

"I swear to God she was dead when I got here"

"My junk is stuck in the slats of my chair"

"She said she was 18."

"I was just giving that prostitute a ride, officer.."

"I have a wide stance."

"I never inhaled"

"I was hiking the Appalachian Trail."


"If the glove doesn't fit, you must acquit."
 
2013-04-04 07:01:25 PM
static.blol.me
 
2013-04-04 07:02:32 PM

The Muthaship: People calling her names, and wagging their fingers at her (looking at you here, Gawker) are comically stupid,


In a nutshell - this.
 
2013-04-04 07:02:33 PM

LordOfThePings: Yogimus: Debeo Summa Credo: "It was satire"

"It was my wife typing"

"I was in the marine core"

"the cheese stands alone"

"I want to spend more time with my family"

"I was undercover for a story on prostitution"

"It's a slippery slope"

"I swear to God she was dead when I got here"

"My junk is stuck in the slats of my chair"

"She said she was 18."

"I was just giving that prostitute a ride, officer.."

"I have a wide stance."

"I never inhaled"

"I was hiking the Appalachian Trail."


"I was only looking at that for research purposes"
 
2013-04-04 07:05:08 PM
Its cute that she thinks the grown up world is as gullible as the kids in study hall.

/Enjoy CCAC
 
2013-04-04 07:07:35 PM

ThrobblefootSpectre: jvl: But it was an attempt to be funny. If you didn't get that, you might just be dumber than a rock.

Sarcasm would be better description than satire.  But yeah, it was a hilarious troll of a lot of clueless people who are going to continue to be clueless.


If this were the case she would not be pursuing the matter.
 
2013-04-04 07:08:59 PM

Earl of Chives: LordOfThePings: Yogimus: Debeo Summa Credo: "It was satire"

"It was my wife typing"

"I was in the marine core"

"the cheese stands alone"

"I want to spend more time with my family"

"I was undercover for a story on prostitution"

"It's a slippery slope"

"I swear to God she was dead when I got here"

"My junk is stuck in the slats of my chair"

"She said she was 18."

"I was just giving that prostitute a ride, officer.."

"I have a wide stance."

"I never inhaled"

"I was hiking the Appalachian Trail."

"I was only looking at that for research purposes"


"It was a pun!"
 
2013-04-04 07:09:33 PM
So go to your state college, and flip the bird to the Ivy League. Get a "blue collar" education to learn a marketable skill for a fifth of the money.

/Wah. I put myself through college. And grad school.
 
2013-04-04 07:12:01 PM
Who cares?  She's hot!

"No, really, it was satire!"

"Uh-huh.  Now let me help you out of that..."
 
2013-04-04 07:12:41 PM
In other news, Yale, Princeton, UPenn, and Vanderbilt just saved this young woman about a quarter of a million dollars in student loans.
 
2013-04-04 07:12:58 PM
satire is best executed without being pretentious, and if her college essays sounded anything like the way she talks, i wouldn't blame a single admission officer for not accepting her.  there's a big difference between tongue-in-cheek and foot-in-mouth.
 
2013-04-04 07:13:21 PM

aerojockey: In other news, Yale, Princeton, UPenn, and Vanderbilt just saved this young woman about a quarter of a million dollars in student loans.


It is ALMOST as if entrance boards provide a service to students...
 
2013-04-04 07:13:52 PM

Mister Pleco: Earl of Chives: LordOfThePings: Yogimus: Debeo Summa Credo: "It was satire"

"It was my wife typing"

"I was in the marine core"

"the cheese stands alone"

"I want to spend more time with my family"

"I was undercover for a story on prostitution"

"It's a slippery slope"

"I swear to God she was dead when I got here"

"My junk is stuck in the slats of my chair"

"She said she was 18."

"I was just giving that prostitute a ride, officer.."

"I have a wide stance."

"I never inhaled"

"I was hiking the Appalachian Trail."

"I was only looking at that for research purposes"

"It was a pun!"


"It must be a side effect of the cancer drugs."
 
2013-04-04 07:14:32 PM

Professor Wormbog: satire is best executed without being pretentious, and if her college essays sounded anything like the way she talks, i wouldn't blame a single admission officer for not accepting her.  there's a big difference between tongue-in-cheek and foot-in-mouth.


Jonathan Swift always struck me as pretentious.

Tongue-in-check isn't a fetish; that's the big difference.
 
2013-04-04 07:18:28 PM
We'll see he shortly on Girls Gone Wild. We may have already seen her butthole on Reddit.
 
2013-04-04 07:19:21 PM

bacchanalias and consequences: Margaret Mitchell and Brett Easton Ellis, now with young up-and-comer, Suzy Lee Weis, in on the act! C'mon, everybody, let's hear it for retrospective satire!*cue applause*


I farking hate it when Easton-Ellis pulls one of his stunts, because I genuinely like his novels and short stories. But yeah, he is a grating little turd in real life, isn't he? Christ, what an asshole.
 
2013-04-04 07:20:24 PM
Poor kid.

Once I had a bit of a... let's call it a "professional incident" with a presentation that I thought would be funny.

I got blacklisted for a while, lost my job, lost my shot at one of my all-time dream jobs, but certainly it didn't get heard around the world.
 
2013-04-04 07:20:41 PM
Ah yes the classic satire defense.
 
2013-04-04 07:26:40 PM
If she's so dumb that she doesn't understand the concept of applying to a "safety school" it's no big jump to the conclusion that she really doesn't understand the concept of satire either.

/I hear Devry is nice this time of year.
 
2013-04-04 07:28:11 PM

peasants_are_revolting: An SAT of 2120? When I took it, 1,600 was the highest you could go.


She went full retard.
 
2013-04-04 07:28:50 PM

jvl: It wasn't satire.

But it was an attempt to be funny. If you didn't get that, you might just be dumber than a rock.




If she was legitimately trying to be funny, she gets a little sympathy from me. I have loved getting a laugh out of people since I was a little kid imitating Paul Lynde. Time has shown me how hard it can be to be truly humorous, and generally I fail at it. But written humor is IMHO even harder and using 'edgy' material doubly so. She just found out how it feels to bomb on a national stage. That's gotta sting.
 
2013-04-04 07:30:27 PM
Shadowe:

////People don't give a fark outside of the ivy league anyway

LOL. Sure buddy, you keep telling yourself that...
 
2013-04-04 07:32:25 PM

The Muthaship: I really don't know how she could've mad it any more clear she was kidding, and ultimately being self-effacing in her original letter.

People calling her names, and wagging their fingers at her (looking at you here, Gawker) are comically stupid, reactionary twats.


pretty much this, I actually enjoyed it.
 
2013-04-04 07:35:11 PM

aerojockey: In other news, Yale, Princeton, UPenn, and Vanderbilt just saved this young woman about a quarter of a million dollars in student loans.


Mind you, if she's going out-of-state to University of Michigan (or any high-level midwestern university), she'll have at least $100K-$200K in student loans anyways without parental support.

/In-state is laughably expensive.
//Out-of-state is hilariously expensive.
///And then Mom went unemployed and Dad didn't count (divorce), so I got a not-quite free ride for 2 years, and left with $15K.  Pure luck that.
////And then I moved to the Bay Area, and became "Bay Area Poverty", which is real people speak for "Top 10% of household incomes in the country," so $15K is pocket change.
 
2013-04-04 07:36:14 PM

Tigger: yeah, that's convincing

"It was satire"

"It was my wife typing"

"I was in the marine core"


My dog typed it and sent it in
 
2013-04-04 07:41:43 PM

theMagni: Once I had a bit of a... let's call it a "professional incident" with a presentation that I thought would be funny.

I got blacklisted for a while, lost my job, lost my shot at one of my all-time dream jobs, but certainly it didn't get heard around the world.


Sounds like a CSB. Share!
 
2013-04-04 07:46:13 PM

peasants_are_revolting: An SAT of 2120? When I took it, 1,600 was the highest you could go.


"It's a joke."
 
2013-04-04 07:46:18 PM
I read it as a humor piece but I wouldn't use the word satire. But now she's a famous writer, so she's got that going for her. I hope she gets a book deal out of it.

/14 minutes
//don't blow it kid
///you know why
 
2013-04-04 07:49:01 PM

Gyrfalcon: peasants_are_revolting: An SAT of 2120? When I took it, 1,600 was the highest you could go.

"It's a joke."


Max is 2400 now.  There's an essay section now.
 
2013-04-04 07:52:54 PM
As God is her witness
She knows she's funny...
 
2013-04-04 07:53:16 PM

Kaenneth: Mister Pleco: Earl of Chives: LordOfThePings: Yogimus: Debeo Summa Credo: "It was satire"

"It was my wife typing"

"I was in the marine core"

"the cheese stands alone"

"I want to spend more time with my family"

"I was undercover for a story on prostitution"

"It's a slippery slope"

"I swear to God she was dead when I got here"

"My junk is stuck in the slats of my chair"

"She said she was 18."

"I was just giving that prostitute a ride, officer.."

"I have a wide stance."

"I never inhaled"

"I was hiking the Appalachian Trail."

"I was only looking at that for research purposes"

"It was a pun!"

"It must be a side effect of the cancer drugs."


"White liberals are the most racists people there are."
 
2013-04-04 07:54:25 PM

The Muthaship: Gyrfalcon: peasants_are_revolting: An SAT of 2120? When I took it, 1,600 was the highest you could go.

"It's a joke."

Max is 2400 now.  There's an essay section now.


Wow.  So, now there's a point on learning to write essays.

/How I Spent My Summer Vacation....
 
2013-04-04 07:55:22 PM
i see Boxxy is still trolling the net
 
2013-04-04 07:55:51 PM

DarwiOdrade: Kaenneth: Mister Pleco: Earl of Chives: LordOfThePings: Yogimus: Debeo Summa Credo: "It was satire"

"It was my wife typing"

"I was in the marine core"

"the cheese stands alone"

"I want to spend more time with my family"

"I was undercover for a story on prostitution"

"It's a slippery slope"

"I swear to God she was dead when I got here"

"My junk is stuck in the slats of my chair"

"She said she was 18."

"I was just giving that prostitute a ride, officer.."

"I have a wide stance."

"I never inhaled"

"I was hiking the Appalachian Trail."

"I was only looking at that for research purposes"

"It was a pun!"

"It must be a side effect of the cancer drugs."

"White liberals are the most racists people there are."


"Where did that pickle photo come from?"
 
2013-04-04 07:57:19 PM

Kaenneth: Mister Pleco: Earl of Chives: LordOfThePings: Yogimus: Debeo Summa Credo: "It was satire"

"It was my wife typing"

"I was in the marine core"

"the cheese stands alone"

"I want to spend more time with my family"

"I was undercover for a story on prostitution"

"It's a slippery slope"

"I swear to God she was dead when I got here"

"My junk is stuck in the slats of my chair"

"She said she was 18."

"I was just giving that prostitute a ride, officer.."

"I have a wide stance."

"I never inhaled"

"I was hiking the Appalachian Trail."

"I was only looking at that for research purposes"

"It was a pun!"

"It must be a side effect of the cancer drugs."



"Will haben pflichtmitten und der heinerblatzen - There is sauerkraut in my lederhosen"
 
2013-04-04 08:00:15 PM
I would find her more amusing if she were naked.
 
2013-04-04 08:11:12 PM

peasants_are_revolting: An SAT of 2120? When I took it, 1,600 was the highest you could go.



They shouldn't score it at all, that's discriminatory and racist. Everyone should get a participation trophy!
 
2013-04-04 08:11:23 PM
From the excerpts in the article her essay sounds pretty funny. The admissions process really is a joke. What is the definition of favoring one person over the other? Discrimination. As in favoring someones race over their test scores.
 
2013-04-04 08:12:17 PM

The Muthaship: Gyrfalcon: peasants_are_revolting: An SAT of 2120? When I took it, 1,600 was the highest you could go.

"It's a joke."

Max is 2400 now.  There's an essay section now.


Interesting. Explains why the little muffin didn't score higher, I guess...her writing skills are dreadful.
 
2013-04-04 08:13:42 PM

Rufus Lee King: Mister Pleco: The Muthaship: Gyrfalcon: peasants_are_revolting: An SAT of 2120? When I took it, 1,600 was the highest you could go.

"It's a joke."

Max is 2400 now.  There's an essay section now.

Wow.  So, now there's a point on learning to write essays.

/How I Spent My Summer Vacation....

The first day of my summer vacation I woke up. Then I went downtown to look for a job. Then I hung out in front of the drugstore.

The second day of my summer vacation...oh, hell, y'all know the rest.



Hey, I gotta godada can, man!
 
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