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(Daily Mail)   'I resented the time my children consumed. Like parasites, they took from me and didn't give back`   (dailymail.co.uk) divider line 277
    More: Ironic, other mother, sports clubs, Isle of Wight  
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18044 clicks; posted to Main » on 04 Apr 2013 at 3:36 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-04-04 01:52:17 PM
Some people.
If she had been in a society that accepted gay marriage and childlessness by choice this never would have happened.
 
2013-04-04 01:56:03 PM
So, children are all-consuming drains on your life, time, and money? And they force you to put aside your hopes, dreams and desires to provide for their every need, even surpassing the needs YOU have?

Well, I'll be a monkey's uncle. I just won't be a rug-monkey's DAD.
 
2013-04-04 02:04:07 PM
This site is so bananas. Fark should have greened the merman link. At least it could have been believable.
 
2013-04-04 02:06:21 PM
Well, yeah, but you weren't going to do anything meaningful with your life anyway. No, you say that you were, but you really weren't. So now instead of being just a loser you're a loser with kids.
 
2013-04-04 02:13:02 PM
I cannot understand mothers who insist they want children - especially those who undergo years of fertility treatment - then race back to work at the earliest opportunity after giving birth, leaving the vital job of caring for them to strangers. Why have them at all if you don't want to bring them up, or can't afford to? And why pretend you wanted them if you have no intention of raising them? This hypocrisy is, in my view, far more pernicious and difficult to fathom than my own admission that my life would have been better without children.

Neither do I. That's why I never had kids; I never wanted the responsibility. Now that I'm too old to have kids, the relatives who thought I was selfish for not doing so have finally stopped bugging me about it. Yay.

I'm perfectly happy being a godmother to 3 kids (now all in their 20s) and an aunt to 2. I love spending time with my youngest nephew (who's almost 2). I really love being able to give said nephew back to his parents at the end of the day. :)
 
2013-04-04 02:20:15 PM

Nadie_AZ: This site is so bananas. Fark should have greened the merman link. At least it could have been believable.


That was greened a few days ago
 
2013-04-04 02:30:18 PM
Yeah, my mom was like that.  Awesome way to grow up.
 
2013-04-04 02:37:26 PM
I'm sure Stuart and Isabelle's facebook feeds are just BLOWING up today with the good news.

Lando Lincoln: Well, yeah, but you weren't going to do anything meaningful with your life anyway. No, you say that you were, but you really weren't. So now instead of being just a loser you're a loser with kids.


Are you kidding?  With her looks, she could've been a model!  Oh, wait, replace "model" with "test subject."
 
2013-04-04 02:45:41 PM
"What I valued most in my life was time on my own; to reflect, read and enjoy my own company and peace of mind."


If your greatest joy and fulfillment comes with being alone, DON'T HAVE KIDS!!
 
2013-04-04 02:49:40 PM

The Stealth Hippopotamus: If your greatest joy and fulfillment comes with being alone, DON'T HAVE KIDS!!


Seriously.  I've always wanted kids and so I have them.  If you don't want them in the first place, you probably won't enjoy the experience to their detriment.
 
2013-04-04 02:55:58 PM

AbbeySomeone: Some people.
If she had been in a society that accepted gay marriage and childlessness by choice this never would have happened.


still not too late to abort them
no wait, 33 years later? LOL
 
2013-04-04 03:06:39 PM

AbbeySomeone: If she had been in a society that accepted gay marriage and childlessness by choice this never would have happened.


I agree with this wholeheartedly. I think that if you fully understand the responsibilities and resources needed to raise a child, and you still want to, then definitely go ahead. I choose not to because I do think it would not be a good experience for me.

Fortunately, I think in general our culture is moving towards accepting childlessness. Other than one young cousin, I don't think anyone has asked me why I'm not having children. I do have a friend who says that in her insular Brooklyn Jewish world, she still gets asked about marriage/kids all the time, but I'm in the mid-west and it just never comes up.
 
2013-04-04 03:07:39 PM
Unfortunately, I think I lot of people who say they don't want kids are told "oh, you'll feel differently when you have them!" Maybe some people do, but clearly not everyone does.
 
2013-04-04 03:11:44 PM
If you want to have kids, awesome. If you don't want to have kids, awesome. But there's no way you are allowed to regret the decision once you make it (assuming it's by choice). You cannot say you didn't know what parenthood was going to entail. There are thousands of books on the subject, it's the topic of endless movies and TV shows. You are surrounded by millions of people that have kids. You know what it's all about. You made this choice, and you live with it. Do not project your mistakes onto your children, that is entirely unfair to your kids to have to grow up in that environment.

I'm debating if I ever want kids because I know what I'd have to sacrifice. The idea is that the joy of raising children outweighs the price you pay. If you don't agree with the veracity of that idea, then DON'T. HAVE. KIDS.
 
2013-04-04 03:12:40 PM

kxs401: Unfortunately, I think I lot of people who say they don't want kids are told "oh, you'll feel differently when you have them!" Maybe some people do, but clearly not everyone does.


I bet if she hadn't had kids she would still be biatching about it. She just strikes me as that type
 
2013-04-04 03:15:54 PM

kxs401: Unfortunately, I think I lot of people who say they don't want kids are told "oh, you'll feel differently when you have them!" Maybe some people do, but clearly not everyone does.


I hate that sentiment. No one should take on the responsibility of taking care of another human being for 18+ years on the off chance you feel differently someday. Having kids should be something you WANT to do. Not something you do because you feel you should.
 
2013-04-04 03:17:08 PM

Nadie_AZ: This site is so bananas. Fark should have greened the merman link. At least it could have been believable.


We did. Greenlit on April 3rd.
 
2013-04-04 03:17:47 PM
Parenting isn't for everyone.
 
2013-04-04 03:19:44 PM

Lorelle: I'm perfectly happy being a godmother to 3 kids (now all in their 20s) and an aunt to 2. I love spending time with my youngest nephew (who's almost 2). I really love being able to give said nephew back to his parents at the end of the day. :)


Yup.  There's plenty of good things you can do for kids without being a parent, and being able to kick back at the end of the day (or the beginning, or middle) is something I'd really have a hard time giving up.
 
2013-04-04 03:22:33 PM
she's not a horrible person, but it is pretty clear she's a sociopath, or something close to it.  She does what she thinks is expected of of but she's incapable of making an emotional assesment about it.  She says she loves her husband, and says their marriage would have been better without kids, but also nots that he clearly wanted kids and was a devoted father.  This means she is literally incabapable of empathizing with his wants or needs even though she says she loves him.   The other tell is the idea  that the kids "drain her time and energy and give nothing back".  It means she really ins't capable of forming or benefitting from an emotional bond with another living thing.  Hell even my CAT gives me something back for the itme and energy I invest in her, much less my son.

I feel most sorry for the daughter that needs mom to be her caretaker,  to be trapped inside your body and cared for by someone who resents your very existance.....*shudder*
 
2013-04-04 03:26:29 PM

Car_Ramrod: I hate that sentiment. No one should take on the responsibility of taking care of another human being for 18+ years on the off chance you feel differently someday. Having kids should be something you WANT to do. Not something you do because you feel you should.



I wasn't sure I wanted the kids I had. It was mostly nerves. I wasn't like the lady in the article! I was just really really unsure and scared. And I defy anyone who had to raise a toddler to tell me they never had the thought "damn I shouldn't have done this, I dont know if I'm going to make it". I was the first of my group of friends to get married and they always asked me for advice. I'll tell them the exact same thing I told them, "you're going to have some dark thoughts, really really dark thoughts but that's ok 'cause I had them too and it does get better"

People who say kids are no problem and they enjoyed every second of it scare me.
 
2013-04-04 03:30:38 PM

Magorn: she's not a horrible person, but it is pretty clear she's a sociopath, or something close to it.  She does what she thinks is expected of of but she's incapable of making an emotional assesment about it.  She says she loves her husband, and says their marriage would have been better without kids, but also nots that he clearly wanted kids and was a devoted father.  This means she is literally incabapable of empathizing with his wants or needs even though she says she loves him.   The other tell is the idea  that the kids "drain her time and energy and give nothing back".  It means she really ins't capable of forming or benefitting from an emotional bond with another living thing.  Hell even my CAT gives me something back for the itme and energy I invest in her, much less my son.

I feel most sorry for the daughter that needs mom to be her caretaker,  to be trapped inside your body and cared for by someone who resents your very existance.....*shudder*


Those were pretty much my thoughts reading that.
 
2013-04-04 03:36:09 PM

The Stealth Hippopotamus: People who say kids are no problem and they enjoyed every second of it scare me.


They're either lying to you or they're lying to themselves. But they ARE lying.
 
2013-04-04 03:36:51 PM

The Stealth Hippopotamus: Car_Ramrod: I hate that sentiment. No one should take on the responsibility of taking care of another human being for 18+ years on the off chance you feel differently someday. Having kids should be something you WANT to do. Not something you do because you feel you should.


I wasn't sure I wanted the kids I had. It was mostly nerves. I wasn't like the lady in the article! I was just really really unsure and scared. And I defy anyone who had to raise a toddler to tell me they never had the thought "damn I shouldn't have done this, I dont know if I'm going to make it". I was the first of my group of friends to get married and they always asked me for advice. I'll tell them the exact same thing I told them, "you're going to have some dark thoughts, really really dark thoughts but that's ok 'cause I had them too and it does get better"

People who say kids are no problem and they enjoyed every second of it scare me.


I barely know what I'm doing in my own life. Having that uncertainty about the care of another human being would scare the crap out of me.
 
2013-04-04 03:38:42 PM

I know my life with Tony would have been so much happier without children, less complicated and more carefree


Or he would have dumped your sorry ass for someone who DID want children, you silly bint.
 
2013-04-04 03:39:56 PM
Even as someone who chose to remain childless, this woman comes off as an offensively selfish biatch.
 
2013-04-04 03:40:13 PM
My mother made that very clear all my life.
 
2013-04-04 03:41:02 PM
Retribution is always possible:

8020.photos.jpgmag.com
 
2013-04-04 03:41:32 PM
GRANDMA should have had a *retroactive abortion*.
 
2013-04-04 03:42:50 PM
So
She
Oh
Path
 
2013-04-04 03:42:54 PM
This article brought to you by bitter old biatches everywhere, if you didn't want kids then you should have divorced him.
 
2013-04-04 03:43:16 PM

Lando Lincoln: The Stealth Hippopotamus: People who say kids are no problem and they enjoyed every second of it scare me.

They're either lying to you or they're lying to themselves. But they ARE lying.


I straight up tell people my daughter is a soulless hell spawn that was sent up from the fiery pits to enslave mankind (curly red-haired 15 month old devil she is!) and that I will be her first soul drained victim.

Doesn't mean I don't love her, I just recognize that she is evil.

On the other hand, since the weather is warming up I think I might go buy a baseball glove for my 3 year old son this weekend.

/take the good times with the bad times
 
2013-04-04 03:43:58 PM
cplcrud.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-04-04 03:44:06 PM
My favorite part of the article was the links lynx. Everyday is Caturday at the Daily Mail.
i.dailymail.co.uk i.dailymail.co.uk i.dailymail.co.uk i.dailymail.co.uk i.dailymail.co.uk i.dailymail.co.uk i.dailymail.co.uk
 
2013-04-04 03:45:25 PM
At least she was fulfilling her duty to God.
 
2013-04-04 03:45:29 PM
I love they way she thought it was selfish to have just one kid. It's even more selfish to be a crappy Mom.

/Mom of a 15 year old that just lost her retainers, which will cost $530.00 to replace.
 
2013-04-04 03:45:35 PM

timujin: Yeah, my mom was like that.  Awesome way to grow up.


And the fact that she was a "total drain" on her own parents as a child probably never entered her mind, did it?

Here's how I see it:
A. I like kids. I love my own kids.
B. Having kids makes me strive to get a better job, move to a career so that I can pay to raise them. If not, I might still be waiting tables and drinking 6 nights a week.
C. As the years progress, I make more money, find jobs with more money, earn more benefits, bu a house, etc.
D. Eventually my kids will be old enough to move out. Suddenly my wife and I are a couple again, but we're making 5-10x what we were making before, even when adjusted for inflation, we own a house, a couple cars, and maybe some 'toys' like a quad, snowmobile, etc.
E. It's vacation 2.0, we can afford to do stuff we never would have done if we didn't have the drive that comes from wanting to be able to provide for the kids.
F. Besides, who knows when one will turn out rich and successful and buy us a house in return when we hit retirement age, or something?
 
2013-04-04 03:46:15 PM
No thanks- I'm deeply committed to my role as a dotty maiden aunt for my nieces and nephew.  With any luck I'll end up as a wealthy, dotty maiden aunt.  You know, the kind that always gets killed off in Agatha Christie novels maybe I should rethink this
 
2013-04-04 03:46:21 PM
I never want kids. I tend to see people my age with them and they look like they despise them.

The hatred begins after the kid learns to talk. The focus and attention is no longer on the new parent (generally the mom) but the kid. The kid took the attention away and they hate them for that
 
2013-04-04 03:46:39 PM
I knew i hated kids when i was a kid. My wife feels the same way.

If you dont want kids, dont. Its like winning the lottery.
 
2013-04-04 03:46:40 PM

Dahnkster: My favorite part of the article was the links lynx. Everyday is Caturday at the Daily Mail.
[i.dailymail.co.uk image 850x544] [i.dailymail.co.uk image 850x327] [i.dailymail.co.uk image 850x644] [i.dailymail.co.uk image 850x569] [i.dailymail.co.uk image 850x422] [i.dailymail.co.uk image 850x377] [i.dailymail.co.uk image 850x560]


Is this the Fark equivalent of being at work, talking with a group of parents about their children, and then some lonely person barges in and goes "Oh, my little Fluffy does the exact same thing!" thinking that having a pet is the exact same thing as having a child?

/cause, it's not, no matter how much you want to believe it is
//trust me, the pets are easier to take care of
 
2013-04-04 03:47:03 PM
Jesus.

tl;dr.  That was a whole lot of text about a woman who was "meh" about her kids.
 
2013-04-04 03:47:06 PM
I should send her some wire hangers.
 
2013-04-04 03:47:07 PM
Someone's going to die alone and unloved in a squalid elder hostel.
 
2013-04-04 03:47:57 PM

Nonrepeating Rotating Binary: So
She
Oh
Path


You think that every person, married or not, that doesn't want to be a parent is a sociopath?

Interesting.
 
2013-04-04 03:48:04 PM

Magorn: she's not a horrible person, but it is pretty clear she's a sociopath, or something close to it.  She does what she thinks is expected of of but she's incapable of making an emotional assesment about it.  She says she loves her husband, and says their marriage would have been better without kids, but also nots that he clearly wanted kids and was a devoted father.  This means she is literally incabapable of empathizing with his wants or needs even though she says she loves him.   The other tell is the idea  that the kids "drain her time and energy and give nothing back".  It means she really ins't capable of forming or benefitting from an emotional bond with another living thing.  Hell even my CAT gives me something back for the itme and energy I invest in her, much less my son.

I feel most sorry for the daughter that needs mom to be her caretaker,  to be trapped inside your body and cared for by someone who resents your very existance.....*shudder*


A solid assessment. I have nothing to add.
 
2013-04-04 03:48:43 PM
I've got a 5 week old son.  It's awesome.  I've never been the type to go out to the bars.  Loud and crowded parties don't interest me.  I like to hang out with the wife, watch movies, play video games, drink beer, grill, fish.  Basically, just about everything I like to do, I can do with my son when he's old enough.  Right now, the only way he is interfering with my life is that sometimes when I'm holding him during his nap and playing a game at the same time, he kicks the controller in his sleep.  The lady in this article is a dumb farking coont.
 
2013-04-04 03:49:00 PM

kxs401: "oh, you'll feel differently when you have them!"


No I won't
I remember what kind of a kid I was.
I'm dodging that Karma like the flash.
 
2013-04-04 03:49:04 PM
CSS:

My mother hates kids, and will tell you this repeatedly if you ask. She's one of those that will yell in the middle of a store "Who do these belong to?" when there are a bunch of misbehaving kids around. So it's no surprise that my brother repeated what she said, only to his second-grade teacher. The teacher accused my brother of lying and punished him to detention. When bro told Mom about his day, she went with him to school the next day and explained to the teacher, that actually, she hates children, which is why she raises adults who act like responsible adults who find out if people are lying before they needlessly punish them.

/end CSS
//I seriously had a cool mom
 
2013-04-04 03:49:16 PM

The Stealth Hippopotamus: People who say kids are no problem and they enjoyed every second of it scare me.


They might be a challenge, but they aren't the life killer TV and the movies portray them as. I have less money to go out, and have t actually arrange for a babysitter if we go out of town, and that's about it. I don't "enjoy every second", but I enjoy every day with them, and they really aren't a problem any more than a dog or cat is. Hell, eventually they get old enough to dress and feed themselves. You have to scoop poop for that dog and fill its bowl until it keels over dead.
 
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