Do you have adblock enabled?
 
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)   A hot shave can be very relaxing, if you don't try heating the shaving cream can on the stove   (tampabay.com ) divider line
    More: Florida  
•       •       •

4229 clicks; posted to Main » on 04 Apr 2013 at 12:04 AM (3 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



69 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | » | Newest | Show all

 
2013-04-03 08:34:21 PM  
Step One:  Make Pikachu feel very, very nice...


i.imgur.com

Step two, I don't think, leads to facial laceration.
 
2013-04-03 08:44:43 PM  
Not on the stove, idiot.
Use a butane torch.
 
2013-04-03 09:48:42 PM  
Get a shaving brush and some bar shave soap. It's the best way to shave, a little more expensive up front but much cheaper in the long run.
 
2013-04-03 10:14:18 PM  
♫ When Farkers are seeking a greenlight
For headlines they wish to submit
The Florida Tag hits the jackpot
And cans of explosive SHHhaving cream
Be nice and clean
Shave every day and you'll always look keen  ♫
 
2013-04-03 10:22:55 PM  

Amos Quito: ♫ When Farkers are seeking a greenlight
For headlines they wish to submit
The Florida Tag hits the jackpot
And cans of explosive SHHhaving cream
Be nice and clean
Shave every day and you'll always look keen  ♫


hehehehe
nice.
 
2013-04-03 10:26:16 PM  
To relax

Try a hot shave

Heat it on the stove

For an early grave

i49.tinypic.com
 
2013-04-03 10:27:36 PM  
See what happens when you try to save $65?

/Wonder what his deductible is for emergency room visits?
 
2013-04-03 11:24:12 PM  
One of the rare times when Gillette is the WORST a man can get.
 
2013-04-04 12:06:10 AM  
Shave and a haircut.  Two bits.
 
2013-04-04 12:09:50 AM  
This is what happens when we don't require basic science education in schools.
 
2013-04-04 12:11:22 AM  

CaptSacto: Not on the stove, idiot.
Use a butane torch.


How will I hold my beer?
 
2013-04-04 12:13:34 AM  

PacManDreaming: To relax

Try a hot shave

Heat it on the stove

For an early grave

[i49.tinypic.com image 157x46]


6 and done. Too long to wait for a Burma Shave reference, though.
 
2013-04-04 12:14:28 AM  

EvilEgg: Get a shaving brush and some bar shave soap. It's the best way to shave, a little more expensive up front but much cheaper in the long run.


Local pharmacy...

Omega brush = 10-12$
Proraso soap = 8-9$

Brush = good for many years
Soap = mine lasted over a full year @ 2-3 shaves a week.


Blades for my DE = 15$ with shipping for at least 100 = 3 shaves per blade = blades for a loooooong (about 2 years) time
My Razor, a Parker 96R = 40$ with shipping = good probably for the rest of my life

Never looked back.
 
2013-04-04 12:14:50 AM  

CaptSacto: Amos Quito: ♫ When Farkers are seeking a greenlight
For headlines they wish to submit
The Florida Tag hits the jackpot
And cans of explosive SHHhaving cream
Be nice and clean
Shave every day and you'll always look keen  ♫

hehehehe
nice.


I only have vague recollections of that song from my childhood.  What's it from?  All I remember is "blah blah blah stepped in a pile of SHHHHaving cream".
 
2013-04-04 12:15:07 AM  

JasonOfOrillia: Shave and a haircut.  Two bits.


In this case, it's more

Shave and KABOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM, hospital ride.
 
2013-04-04 12:15:31 AM  

Fano: Too long to wait for a Burma Shave reference, though.


I'm in my 40s and all I know of Burma Shave is old Mad Magazines written before I was born. Has anyone on Fark actually SEEN a Burma Shave sign?
 
2013-04-04 12:18:04 AM  

buzzcut73: This is what happens when we don't require basic science education in schools.


Or when we don't have access to microwave ovens.
 
2013-04-04 12:19:29 AM  
stupid should hurt.
 
2013-04-04 12:24:52 AM  

EvilEgg: Get a shaving brush and some bar shave soap. It's the best way to shave, a little more expensive up front but much cheaper in the long run.




Only old men want a close shave. It hides the grey, for a while. Same with short hair cuts. fark old people.
i234.photobucket.com
 
2013-04-04 12:25:28 AM  

Confabulat: Fano: Too long to wait for a Burma Shave reference, though.

I'm in my 40s and all I know of Burma Shave is old Mad Magazines written before I was born. Has anyone on Fark actually SEEN a Burma Shave sign?


I'm in 40's as well and while I've never seen a Burma Shave sign, South of the Border (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/South_of_the_Border_%28attraction%29 ), does have a series of signs that are a take off of the Burma Shave sign theme.  They've had them for over 25 years that I know of.
 
2013-04-04 12:25:41 AM  

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: buzzcut73: This is what happens when we don't require basic science education in schools.

Or when we don't have access to microwave ovens.


Butane Gas Propellant + Metal Can + Microwave.

www.brainygamer.com
 
2013-04-04 12:25:54 AM  
... I'm going to guess that he needed to change his underwear, too.
 
2013-04-04 12:29:55 AM  
Beware death by the Ideal Gas Law.

PV=nRT
 
2013-04-04 12:31:01 AM  
Hot Ding Dong?

/aww, forgot to take the tin foil off too
//and I really wanted that
 
2013-04-04 12:31:06 AM  

StoPPeRmobile: Only old men want a close shave. It hides the grey, for a while.


You know how I know you don't have a wife or child?

/mine both fuss at me and refuse kisses if I don't shave cleanly
 
2013-04-04 12:39:48 AM  
i76.photobucket.com
Take it off. Take it all off.
 
2013-04-04 12:39:58 AM  
I'm in my fifties.  I recall seeing them as a child when we were on vacation.  Perhaps they were regional.
 
2013-04-04 12:40:03 AM  
 
2013-04-04 12:46:57 AM  

gweilo8888: StoPPeRmobile: Only old men want a close shave. It hides the grey, for a while.

You know how I know you don't have a wife or child?

/mine both fuss at me and refuse kisses if I don't shave cleanly


+1

although for about 7 days a month, I grow stubble on PURPOSE. lmao
 
2013-04-04 12:47:35 AM  

brandent: CaptSacto: Amos Quito: ♫ When Farkers are seeking a greenlight
For headlines they wish to submit
The Florida Tag hits the jackpot
And cans of explosive SHHhaving cream
Be nice and clean
Shave every day and you'll always look keen  ♫

hehehehe
nice.

I only have vague recollections of that song from my childhood.  What's it from?  All I remember is "blah blah blah stepped in a pile of SHHHHaving cream".



Classic.
 
2013-04-04 12:48:42 AM  

brandent: I only have vague recollections of that song from my childhood. What's it from? All I remember is "blah blah blah stepped in a pile of SHHHHaving cream".


The magnum opus of Benny Bell. Thanks to Doctor Demento for keeping him in the public eye.
 
2013-04-04 12:54:44 AM  
So to summarize: "Idiot who not only doesn't realize that heating a pressurized vessel is asking for trouble, but also doesn't bother to read or can't read the warning printed on the can that heating a pressurized vessel is asking for trouble gets hurt doing something stupid."

i1.ytimg.com
 
2013-04-04 12:57:45 AM  

StoPPeRmobile: EvilEgg: Get a shaving brush and some bar shave soap. It's the best way to shave, a little more expensive up front but much cheaper in the long run.

Only old men want a close shave. It hides the grey, for a while. Same with short hair cuts. fark old people.
[i234.photobucket.com image 400x400]



You sound like a frustrated Floridian.
 
2013-04-04 12:58:25 AM  

EvilEgg: Get a shaving brush and some bar shave soap. It's the best way to shave, a little more expensive up front but much cheaper in the long run.


Ditched my Gillettes in favor of a Merkur 34C, some shaving soap, oil and a badger hair brush. My wallet and my face have been thanking me ever since.

/So have the ladies.
//Not really.
///(foreveralone.jpg)
 
2013-04-04 01:09:24 AM  
You know how when you're taking a dump and there's nothing to read, so you grab the toiletries from the counter and read the the ingredients out of sheer boredom? Not exposing pressurized cans to heat is usually right there.

How do you spend 50 years of sh*tting and not notice this?
 
2013-04-04 01:14:30 AM  

PacManDreaming: To relax

Try a hot shave

Heat it on the stove

For an early grave

[i49.tinypic.com image 157x46]


Impressive.

Most impressive.

You are my Fark Hero of the day.
 
2013-04-04 01:23:08 AM  
FTA: "He had a red gash under one eye and white liquid on his shirt.
The liquid, he told them, was shaving cream."

Sure it was buddy.
 
2013-04-04 01:26:11 AM  
i.imgur.com
 
2013-04-04 01:46:14 AM  
I thought it was the pressure from the manhole cover that made the shaving cream explode.

/obscure?
 
2013-04-04 01:56:39 AM  

StoPPeRmobile: EvilEgg: Get a shaving brush and some bar shave soap. It's the best way to shave, a little more expensive up front but much cheaper in the long run.

Only old men want a close shave. It hides the grey, for a while. Same with short hair cuts. fark old people.
[i234.photobucket.com image 400x400]


what a bitter little biatch you are. i'm glad for your sake you'll never grow old.
 
2013-04-04 02:01:42 AM  
I imagine it looked like the time my step mom asked me to start the dishwasher.  How was I supposed to know that sink dishwashing liquid and dishwasher dishwashing liquid were totally different?  Eventually, she saw the humor in it.  Eventually.
 
2013-04-04 02:04:06 AM  

mnemonic device: I'm in my fifties.  I recall seeing them as a child when we were on vacation.  Perhaps they were regional.


I remember in the early 60s seeing them on I80 heading east to Salt Lake City across the salt flats.
I was, of course, quite young then, but I remember them.
 
2013-04-04 02:04:22 AM  
I have a sad story to tell you
It may hurt your feelings a bit
Last night when I walked into my bathroom
I stepped in a big pile of...

www.tsbmag.com
 
2013-04-04 02:16:06 AM  

Brainsick: I have a sad story to tell you
It may hurt your feelings a bit
Last night when I walked into my bathroom
I stepped in a big pile of...

[www.tsbmag.com image 300x172]


Shaving cream, be nice and clean.
Shave everyday and you'll always look keen.
 
2013-04-04 02:16:18 AM  

JasonOfOrillia: Shave and a haircut.  Two bits.


Shave and a hair cut. (Blown) to bits.
 
2013-04-04 02:17:22 AM  

dahmers love zombie: Step One:  Make Pikachu feel very, very nice...


[i.imgur.com image 228x300]

Step two, I don't think, leads to facial laceration.


done in one
 
2013-04-04 02:22:24 AM  

imfallen_angel: EvilEgg: Get a shaving brush and some bar shave soap. It's the best way to shave, a little more expensive up front but much cheaper in the long run.

Local pharmacy...

Omega brush = 10-12$
Proraso soap = 8-9$

Brush = good for many years
Soap = mine lasted over a full year @ 2-3 shaves a week.


Blades for my DE = 15$ with shipping for at least 100 = 3 shaves per blade = blades for a loooooong (about 2 years) time
My Razor, a Parker 96R = 40$ with shipping = good probably for the rest of my life

Never looked back.


This, this, this, so much this.

Feather blades in my Parker + Truefitt and Hill Trafalgar / Omega / Cella shave cream (all three are amazing) + $25 Vulfix badger brush = closest shaves ever thought possible and great skin afterwards. 50 blades for $20, too.

/Plus, only 'waste' is the metal blades, which can be recycled.
 
2013-04-04 02:22:29 AM  
Want a hot shave without a trip to the emergency room?

Try visiting a responsible barber. Or purchase a heated shaving cream dispenser, available at Walmart for $65.

Uh, is that a plug for Walmart?

Or, is "Walmart" just what we call all stores now, like how we call tissue "Kleenex?"

Or, maybe there isn't anywhere else to shop in Florida but Walmart?

...

Why does this article mention Walmart?!
 
2013-04-04 02:31:44 AM  

PacManDreaming: To relax

Try a hot shave

Heat it on the stove

For an early grave


i49.tinypic.com


If you follow

That simple formula

It's plain to tell

You are from Florida

i49.tinypic.com
 
2013-04-04 02:49:00 AM  
really all this talk of fancy shaving, i just grab some Gillette and some random shaving cream and hit the road.... meh...
 
Displayed 50 of 69 comments


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | » | Newest | Show all


View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
On Twitter








In Other Media
  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report