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(Google)   Best Leader has final approval to launch nukes   (google.com) divider line 639
    More: News, United States, National Defense University, Defense Secretary Chuck Hagel, Ministry of Unification, nuclear detonation, weapons-grade plutonium, North Korean military, interceptors  
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20872 clicks; posted to Main » on 03 Apr 2013 at 8:07 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-04-03 08:30:06 PM  

dameron: It'd be REALLY hard to find a well hidden atomic bomb. Even given 1940's technology, the radioactive plutonium core of an implosion type bomb would weight less than 20 pounds.


They have radiation detectors that would pick it up, that said, it might be too late by the time we detect them.
 
2013-04-03 08:30:45 PM  
This is so farking crazy. Just completely nuts. On one hand there is a good chance it's a bluff... but at the same time if NK does have something up it's sleeve they are crazy enough to use it. I hope it is a bluff otherwise a lot of people are going to die, lots of people in Seoul and alot of poor brainwashed North Koreans. And the rebuilding of NK would make Iraq look like putting up a plastic playground.
 
2013-04-03 08:31:03 PM  
i306.photobucket.com
 
2013-04-03 08:31:18 PM  

Gyrfalcon: OTOH, if Kim starts a war he knows he has to lose, he can surrender to the US on his own terms, which would include throwing his loyal generals under an Abrams tank (literally or figuratively, doesn't much matter) while he keeps his pudgy head intact. It's a win-win for him at this point.


Not really, because once an actual shooting war starts he'd be either totally sequestered from command and put in a locked room somewhere, or murdered.
 
2013-04-03 08:31:27 PM  

Ambivalence: Put me down for Okinawa in the NK nuke pool.


I'll put my money on them farking up and accidentally nuking themselves.
 
2013-04-03 08:31:38 PM  
Nuking that nightmarish little backwater of brainwashed midgets would be an act of mercy.
 
2013-04-03 08:32:14 PM  

Bontesla: The more he moves toward war - the more I'm thinking that he had something up his sleeve.


Yeah, I have that same feeling. It seems most everyone here thinks this is some opportunity to laugh and joke about the situation by mocking N. Korea. I don't think they should underestimate Korea's capabilities though. If I were ruling an underdog nation I would purposefully mislead intelligence, build allies, make myself and the country look weak and incapable, build an arsenal on foreign and domestic soil, and launch an attack on my enemies infrastructure, kill the Internet, release airborn biological weapons, chemical, and nukes from outside my own country.
 
2013-04-03 08:32:18 PM  
I think at this point the only thing stopping North Korea from being a large flat sheet of volcanic glass is the worry that China might step in.

NK has nukes.  It is threatening to use them (allbeit we all know they'd be hard pressed to launch them 5 feet!) agains the west (The US, South Korea, Japan - so I'm fine!)....all we need is some divvy private taking a potshot to give the US casus beli and it's GO TIME.

But, as I said, the Chinese would likely intervene, now you've got two nuclear states (who can launch at each other) looking down the barrel of their ICBM's...

This is China's place...they need to intervene and just take over in NK.  If they really want to be a world power, this is the price they have to pay...you keep order in your own backyard...
 
2013-04-03 08:32:35 PM  
Perhaps he believes that the US once tried to kill his daddy.
 
2013-04-03 08:32:39 PM  
Uns gonna die like Sam Neill in Red October and hes going to say he would have liked to have seen Azeroth.

/end scene
 
2013-04-03 08:33:13 PM  
North Korea approves a nuclear strike on America? Isn't North Korea a dictatorship run by Lil'un?  How does a dictatorship need permission and who did he get permission from?  Are they saying that yesterday if he wanted to launch nukes, he would've been denied, but today it's a-okay?

I give myself permission to take a shiat.  Now that I decided that I have permission, if I choose to do so, I may.  Whereas 30secs ago if I had wanted to I would've needed to go through the extra step of giving myself permission.  Unless this is like saying, "I"m going to take a shiat RIGHT NOW."  Then that is more of a warning and a threat and everyone should be scared, especially those people in the car with me.
 
2013-04-03 08:33:13 PM  
If you were really serious about attacking an enemy, would you announce your intentions it to the entire world so he prepare for it?
 
2013-04-03 08:33:42 PM  
Silly little toad drank his own Kool Aid. The article seemed a little long for something that is 0% threat.
 
2013-04-03 08:34:34 PM  

Giltric: ClavellBCMI: Assuming Best Korea's Troll-In-Chief actually *has* nukes to spare to throw at someone, and assuming he actually has a missile to attach them to that can fly further than 1,000km, and assuming he has a guidance system that can actually allow a warhead to come within 5km of his intended target, he *might* actually be able to cause some damage... right before we turn Best Korea into the World's Biggest Glass-Covered Self-Lighting Parking Lot.

We lost face on the world stage when Bush invaded Iraq.

Do we get another peace prize when we incinerate millions of Nork civillians?

Is it a different because Obama is black?


No, it is not different, it is probably not the correct response, but if Kim Jong-Un does throw even a single nuke at anyone, the response will be the Total Annihilation of North Korea, whether we like it or not.
 
2013-04-03 08:34:52 PM  

enemy of the state: GAT_00: SnakeLee: "Never has the whole Korean peninsula been exposed to such danger of a nuclear war as today," it added.

[c481901.r1.cf2.rackcdn.com image 364x370]

You sure about that?

Eisenhower openly considered ending the Korean war with nukes.  He thought it was a cheap way to wage war.

I think you're thinking of MacArthur. None of the biographies of Ike that I've read claim that he considered at all.

It is true that the military in the US at that time viewed nukes as a very good bang for the buck bargain without much thought about what a nuclear war would really mean...


His policy directives say otherwise.  Eisenhower has been whitewashed by history once we decided nukes were bad.
 
2013-04-03 08:34:52 PM  
Exactly, mein Fürher; excuse me, Dear Leader. It is not only possible, it is essential. That is the whole idea of this machine, you know. Deterrence is the art of producing in the mind of the enemy... the fear to attack. And so, because of the automated and irrevocable decision making process which rules out human meddling, the doomsday machine is terrifying. It's simple to understand. And completely credible, and convincing
 
2013-04-03 08:35:10 PM  
 

Giltric: ClavellBCMI: Assuming Best Korea's Troll-In-Chief actually *has* nukes to spare to throw at someone, and assuming he actually has a missile to attach them to that can fly further than 1,000km, and assuming he has a guidance system that can actually allow a warhead to come within 5km of his intended target, he *might* actually be able to cause some damage... right before we turn Best Korea into the World's Biggest Glass-Covered Self-Lighting Parking Lot.

We lost face on the world stage when Bush invaded Iraq.

Do we get another peace prize when we incinerate millions of Nork civillians?

Is it a different because Obama is black?


If you seriously think America wouldn't retaliate to a nuclear strike with one of it's own because we might get bad PR, you're an idiot.
 
2013-04-03 08:35:34 PM  
He's committing suicide by country.
 
2013-04-03 08:35:40 PM  

jjwars1: build allies


North Korea has not done this.

BigLuca: Isn't North Korea a dictatorship run by Lil'un?


No.
 
2013-04-03 08:36:36 PM  

Wizard Drongo: I think at this point the only thing stopping North Korea from being a large flat sheet of volcanic glass is the worry that China might step in.


And the fact that he haven't actually attacked any nuclear powers.
 
2013-04-03 08:36:38 PM  

Wizard Drongo: I think at this point the only thing stopping North Korea from being a large flat sheet of volcanic glass is the worry that China might step in.

NK has nukes.  It is threatening to use them (allbeit we all know they'd be hard pressed to launch them 5 feet!) agains the west (The US, South Korea, Japan - so I'm fine!)....all we need is some divvy private taking a potshot to give the US casus beli and it's GO TIME.

But, as I said, the Chinese would likely intervene, now you've got two nuclear states (who can launch at each other) looking down the barrel of their ICBM's...

This is China's place...they need to intervene and just take over in NK.  If they really want to be a world power, this is the price they have to pay...you keep order in your own backyard...


China might be reaching a tipping point. Fatty Kim
 
2013-04-03 08:36:41 PM  
i.imgur.com
 
2013-04-03 08:37:36 PM  

PonceAlyosha: jjwars1: build allies

North Korea has not done this.

BigLuca: Isn't North Korea a dictatorship run by Lil'un?

No.


I mostly wrote that for the take-a-shiat-in-the-car analogy.
 
2013-04-03 08:37:39 PM  

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: This seemed relevant at the time.


YES!
 
2013-04-03 08:37:54 PM  
So, should I plan on making that emergency asylum to Canuckistan plan come to fruition?
 
2013-04-03 08:38:09 PM  

BigLuca: PonceAlyosha: jjwars1: build allies

North Korea has not done this.

BigLuca: Isn't North Korea a dictatorship run by Lil'un?

No.

I mostly wrote that for the take-a-shiat-in-the-car analogy.


Oh, sorry. I'm grouchy and facty tonight.
 
2013-04-03 08:38:17 PM  

xenophon10k: Hope he's warmed up his throwing arm.


Pitcher's got a rubber arm.
 
2013-04-03 08:38:25 PM  

iheartscotch: Exactly, mein Fürher; excuse me, Dear Leader. It is not only possible, it is essential. That is the whole idea of this machine, you know. Deterrence is the art of producing in the mind of the enemy... the fear to attack. And so, because of the automated and irrevocable decision making process which rules out human meddling, the doomsday machine is terrifying. It's simple to understand. And completely credible, and convincing


www.portlandmercury.com
 
2013-04-03 08:38:43 PM  
i.imgur.com">
 
2013-04-03 08:38:50 PM  
Just a bunch of old guys sending young people off to die for them, something our species just looooooves.
And bystanders, can't forget them. That's what they get for not being rich and powerful.

Ugh... I was a teenager when Iraq started, but now I'm old enough to care. fark this shiat.
 
2013-04-03 08:38:50 PM  
YOU GO NOW
 
2013-04-03 08:39:27 PM  
Next week we're going to hear that North Korean TV is reporting that they 'won' the tense standoff and the west has made significant concessions to Dear Leader at which time he'll double rations from 4 grains of rice per day to 8, and he'll be wildly popular in his country.

Someone owes me a beer when I'm right.
 
2013-04-03 08:39:27 PM  
KJU is very young. He has lived a very sheltered and priviledged live. He is basically clueless to the world let alone the typical north korean peasant.  His dad is gone, his mom is gone, he hates his brothers and the welfare of his countrymen is obviously non existent. His marriage was arranged for political convenience and show and probably not a lot of love there either.
That makes him dangerous and unpredictable.
If he sees his rule and death as imminent, he wouldn't blink an eye to take down millions with him. His fellow countrymen let alone South Korean means ziltch.
 
2013-04-03 08:40:05 PM  
You know if someone just farts loud, NK will just be a big hole.
 
2013-04-03 08:40:42 PM  
Best Korea obviously doesn't realize we're not scared by their threats.
 
2013-04-03 08:40:55 PM  
What has China had to say about all this, aside from supporting the UN resolutions?  A guy (country) on your border threatens to nuke your largest trading partner.  C'mon China.
 
2013-04-03 08:40:59 PM  

that bosnian sniper: Ambivalence: Put me down for Okinawa in the NK nuke pool.

I'll put my money on them farking up and accidentally nuking themselves.


Which wouldn't be far from the realm of possibility; both horrifying and hilarious as hell.
 
2013-04-03 08:41:01 PM  

SuperNinjaToad: That makes him dangerous and unpredictable.
If he sees his rule and death as imminent, he wouldn't blink an eye to take down millions with him. His fellow countrymen let alone South Korean means ziltch.


...You do realize he doesn't have control of the armed forces, right?
 
2013-04-03 08:41:48 PM  
This is China's place...they need to intervene and just take over in NK.  If they really want to be a world power, this is the price they have to pay...you keep order in your own backyard...

Quite frankly, I think China is the one turning the key in Un's back.  Their leaders must be ROFLing about all this.  Look at it from their perspective... Duhmerica will step in and eliminate the NK leadership structure, destabilise the country for 10 years - who cares?  In the meantime, they'll get to closely study the latest in American Nuke defense and stealth technology, right on their own doorstep.  In terms of testing their equipment, it couldn't get any better... and I think you can safely trust that plenty of current Chinese equipment will be tested from within NK's borders.
 
2013-04-03 08:42:17 PM  
i0.kym-cdn.com

/Kimchi Jong Un
 
2013-04-03 08:42:21 PM  
Does anyone ever feel like they are being sold or something, I mean final approval? That sounds like something a car sales man says as he slides an offer across a desk.
 
2013-04-03 08:42:44 PM  
i.imgur.com">
 
2013-04-03 08:42:53 PM  

PonceAlyosha: SuperNinjaToad: That makes him dangerous and unpredictable.
If he sees his rule and death as imminent, he wouldn't blink an eye to take down millions with him. His fellow countrymen let alone South Korean means ziltch.

...You do realize he doesn't have control of the armed forces, right?


Isn't he Chairman of the National Defence Commission?
 
2013-04-03 08:42:56 PM  

Igor Jakovsky: What has China had to say about all this, aside from supporting the UN resolutions?  A guy (country) on your border threatens to nuke your largest trading partner.  C'mon China.


See Ow! That was my feelings!' post.
 
2013-04-03 08:43:17 PM  
Unlike his grandfather & father  Kim Jong-un  isn't going to live to see his 31st birthday. One of his "generals" will kill him in the next few months.
 
2013-04-03 08:43:33 PM  

Gyrfalcon: GAT_00: CaptSacto: That's what makes me wonder if Un is really calling the shots.

I saw some article speculating this is all trying to stop a coup from happening, but I don't understand how this would stop a coup either.

Right now, Kim is not personally responsible for any of the atrocities and human rights violations going on in Best Korea (in that he didn't order them, he's just perpetuating them). His generals and advisors, however, are. If Kim wants to make things better and normalize relations with the West, everyone else gets to stand in front of the Hague, and they know it--so if Kim HAS been making such noises, the generals have likewise been making noises to the effect of "Nice lifestyle you got here, 'Dear Leader', shame if anything happened to it."

OTOH, if Kim starts a war he knows he has to lose, he can surrender to the US on his own terms, which would include throwing his loyal generals under an Abrams tank (literally or figuratively, doesn't much matter) while he keeps his pudgy head intact. It's a win-win for him at this point.


Assuming your hypothetical scenerio is true, I would think the generals would easily sense his plot and murder him first.
 
2013-04-03 08:43:34 PM  
 
2013-04-03 08:44:03 PM  
So... who's down for a pre-nuclear-holocaust orgy at my place?
 
2013-04-03 08:44:27 PM  
I'm curious how China is going to react to this.  NK is probably making their lives very difficult right now, it's either shiat or get off the pot.  Keeping America pissed at this sad dictatorship can't be good for business.

I don't see Kim Jong-Un lasting long, no matter what occurs.
 
2013-04-03 08:45:42 PM  

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: This seemed relevant at the time.


Dammit, I should have known better.
 
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