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(io9)   Why movie reboots fail. Reason number 8 is obvioOHGODTHEBEES GETTHEMOFFME   (io9.com) divider line 23
    More: Amusing, movie franchises, Japanese films, Anal-oral sex, giant monsters, Roland Emmerich, Ray Harryhausen, underworlds, Sam Raimi  
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9251 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 03 Apr 2013 at 11:42 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-04-03 11:57:37 AM
6 votes:

Serious Black: Nicolas Cage's The Wicker Man has to be one of the worst movies I have ever seen in my entire life.


Depends on why your expectations.

If you're looking for an atmospheric, chilling horror/thriller with quality acting and a tight script you're out of luck.


If you want to see a guy in a bear suit sucker punching women, The Wicker Man will not disappoint.
2013-04-03 03:38:28 PM
2 votes:
You'll never get a better robot on the rampage than Yul Brynner so why try?

Would like a word with you...

images4.wikia.nocookie.netwiki.base22.com

You have 15 seconds to comply.
2013-04-03 01:34:34 PM
2 votes:
The Stealth Hippopotamus:
[img825.imageshack.us image 800x1265]

'cause I can


t1.gstatic.com

you know, i should write parts for them in my screenplay - 'scarlett johannson and natalie portman make out'
2013-04-03 11:59:19 AM
2 votes:

Snapper Carr: If you want to see a guy in a bear suit sucker punching women, The Wicker Man will not disappoint.


See I went in expecting comedy and I left the theater satisfied
2013-04-03 11:27:59 AM
2 votes:

Ennuipoet: (Cinches onion tightly on belt) People these days can't be bothered to create, they can only remake.  Hollywood reboots a franchise rather than search for the next franchise, it's safe, cheap and they've taught people this is what they want.  Yet, when you look at the big movers on television, The Walking Dead, Game of Thrones, Mad Men, they are breaking new ground and people are eating it up.  Is this what we have to look forward at the theater in 20 years, a Game of the Throne reboot and Holo 3D Don Drapers?


*raises hand quietly* How much for the Holo 3D Don Draper?
2013-04-03 10:28:23 AM
2 votes:
Ohh wait, I also enjoyed the Star Trek reboot. Suck it, haters.
2013-04-03 04:00:58 PM
1 votes:

Freschel: scottydoesntknow: Ohh wait, I also enjoyed the Star Trek reboot. Suck it, haters.

We haters don't care if you like the movie. It was an okay movie but over rated. If any other directors did this movie and did it the same way JJ Abrams made it. Star Trek (2009) will have at least a RT rating of 50% but not more than 70%

Actually they should change the title to Idiocracy  2: Dumb Asses in Space.


l.wigflip.com
2013-04-03 02:34:51 PM
1 votes:

stuhayes2010: A Goonies reboot with modern fat lazy iPhone crazed kids would be hillariously bad.

Writter made a good point though, parents never let their kids out of eye sight these days.

In my day....

/lawn off it.


Who would play Chunk? Normal kids are Chunk sized. They'd need to roll in some morbidly obese child on a wal-mart scooter to make the bit work.
2013-04-03 01:35:11 PM
1 votes:

HeartBurnKid: /man, that duck penis thread really burrowed into my brain


Counter-clockwise?
2013-04-03 01:34:31 PM
1 votes:

The Stealth Hippopotamus: Mikey1969: Yeah, but it makes it sound like they are ALL 1/8th of why it doesn't work. '8 Things That Can Cause a Reboot to Fail' makes it sound like it can be any combination of the 8, but '8 Reasons Movie Reboots Fail', with no qualifiers makes it sound like all reboots fail, and it's all set in stone. That's what bothers me about articles like this. I guess it's more in line with the general complaint about the lack of quality in journalism today, and Gawker is a prime example of that, so I guess you're right. Considering what they have to work with, this is pretty good.

/Do I sound bitter?
//I FEEL bitter


You're that picky with the English language? How do you even log onto this website?! My god your stomach must be riddled with ulsters and you must be having chest pains. The blood shooting from your eyes should have been the first clue something was bad wrong.


And one more picture:
[img825.imageshack.us image 800x1265]

'cause I can


The Irish province?  :-)
2013-04-03 01:10:39 PM
1 votes:
Total Recall rocked.


I have no idea why they had to call it Total Recall! They could have just had his memories triggered by something else and made a whole new movie.

They could have called it "Borne Identity 2250" because it was closer to the Borne Identity movie then it was to Total Recall. And it had this:

img708.imageshack.us

How did this not make billions and billions of dollars?!
2013-04-03 12:47:03 PM
1 votes:

Ennuipoet: (Cinches onion tightly on belt) People these days can't be bothered to create, they can only remake.  Hollywood reboots a franchise rather than search for the next franchise, it's safe, cheap and they've taught people this is what they want.  Yet, when you look at the big movers on television, The Walking Dead, Game of Thrones, Mad Men, they are breaking new ground and people are eating it up.  Is this what we have to look forward at the theater in 20 years, a Game of the Throne reboot and Holo 3D Don Drapers?


That penis is going to be mighty impressive in Holo 3D.

"It's comin' right for us!"

southparkstudios.mtvnimages.com
2013-04-03 12:40:52 PM
1 votes:
Two things:

As a Star Trek fan, I thought the reboot was great.

I hate Julia Roberts.  She can barely act and she is disturbing to look at.
2013-04-03 12:29:53 PM
1 votes:

ExpressPork: The new Clash of the Titans was a succes, thanks to the drooling masses of idiots that bought tickets and called it a "good" movie (some still do).

I'll just pick on this one for now.
Liam Neeson sleepwalked through his role.
The movie relied much too heavily on action sequences, which made them feel stale and boring already about half way through.  Let's just examine the "medusa" fight in both old and new films.  Compare the original scene to the new one.
In the original there is an actual feeling of suspense.  It actually puts you on the edge of your seat.  It makes the scene interesting to watch.  The new medusa scene is just ACTION/FIGHT/BLOOD/SOUND/EFFECTS.  For the next battle...repeat formula.  That's just the first example that comes to mind.  I could go on and on.
And in spite of being a horrible movie, somehow the public spent enough of their money on it to warrant a sequel.  jackiechanwtf.jpg


And ... Clash of the Titans has Sam "The Black Hole of Acting" Worthington in the lead.
2013-04-03 12:19:26 PM
1 votes:

SurfaceTension: Interesting. My experience was just the opposite. I really liked 12. Almost more than 11. The only thing is I think it's a little confusing because basically everything they're doing in Europe is nothing more than the "elaborate show" that LeMarque says they have to put on for Toulour.


5 words that completely took me out of the movie and caused me to lose all interest.

Julia Roberts playing Julia Roberts
2013-04-03 12:15:59 PM
1 votes:

SurfaceTension: My experience was just the opposite. I really liked 12


The only thing I remember about 12 was Julia Roberts playing someone pretending to be Julia Roberts. I think my eyes just glazed over at that point.
2013-04-03 12:12:19 PM
1 votes:

scottydoesntknow: My only issue with 14 now (and granted they have zero control over it) is losing Bernie Mac. Sure he didn't play a crucial role like Clooney, Pitt, or Damon, but you lose some of the cool factor by not having him.


They're really doing a 14? Is it going to be 2 hours of Clooney and Pitt literally beating a dead horse?
2013-04-03 12:10:54 PM
1 votes:

GalFriday: I am currently seeking investors for my reboot of Debbie Does Dallas.  My script is WAAAAY better than the original.


Take the Nolan route and make it grittier and more realistic. Debbie does Detroit. It would almost be a horror movie.
2013-04-03 12:09:34 PM
1 votes:
I am currently seeking investors for my reboot of Debbie Does Dallas.  My script is WAAAAY better than the original.
2013-04-03 12:02:33 PM
1 votes:

Serious Black: Nicolas Cage's The Wicker Man has to be one of the worst movies I have ever seen in my entire life. I'd sooner swallow a whole bottle of ipecac than watch that filthy piece of trash again.


Best comedy of the decade. Hopefully it led people to finding the original; a great suspenseful horror movie.
2013-04-03 11:59:02 AM
1 votes:

Saiga410: scottydoesntknow: I really can't think of many reboots I actually liked beyond Dredd, Rise of the PotA, and Amazing Spider-Man

Gone in 60 seconds?  Though I personally prefer the original.


Oh good choice, Gone is one of my favourites, never seen the original.

I will say the 2000 Ocean's Eleven was miles better than the original. Have you ever seen the original? Sheesh, it's like they didn't even try to make a good movie.
2013-04-03 11:54:17 AM
1 votes:
Nicolas Cage's The Wicker Man has to be one of the worst movies I have ever seen in my entire life. I'd sooner swallow a whole bottle of ipecac than watch that filthy piece of trash again.
2013-04-03 10:23:51 AM
1 votes:
I don't know how I feel about lumping comic book reboots in these lists.
 
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