If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Smithsonian Magazine)   Subby refuses to apologize for this article that says not apologizing actually makes people feel more empowered. NOT SORRY   (blogs.smithsonianmag.com) divider line 113
    More: Ironic  
•       •       •

4150 clicks; posted to Main » on 01 Apr 2013 at 10:41 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



113 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | » | Last | Show all
 
2013-04-01 10:43:15 AM  
That's all right subby. We all still think you're pretty sorry.
 
2013-04-01 10:43:20 AM  
No shiat. Like when a girl dumps you, if you want to get her back jut act like you don't give a shiat.
 
2013-04-01 10:44:09 AM  
It is a sign of weakness.
 
2013-04-01 10:44:37 AM  
Yes, self-righteousness makes you feel very powerful, but it also tends to lead you down a bad bad road.
 
2013-04-01 10:45:28 AM  
I farked the guy my friend had a crush on. I really don't give a fark.
 
2013-04-01 10:46:09 AM  
well, this explains the politics tab...
 
2013-04-01 10:46:29 AM  
In third grade, I cheated on my history exam. In fourth grade, I stole my uncle Max's toupee and I glued it on my face when I was Moses in my Hebrew School play. In fifth grade, I knocked my sister Edie down the stairs and I blamed it on the dog... When my mom sent me to the summer camp for fat kids and then they served lunch I got nuts and I pigged out and they kicked me out... But the worst thing I ever done - I mixed a pot of fake puke at home and then I went to this movie theater, hid the puke in my jacket, climbed up to the balcony and then, t-t-then, I made a noise like this: hua-hua-hua-huaaaaaaa - and then I dumped it over the side, all over the people in the audience. And then, this was horrible, all the people started getting sick and throwing up all over each other. I never felt so bad in my entire life.
 
2013-04-01 10:46:43 AM  
What's even close to being ironic here?  Are you suggesting that people expect apologizing to be empowering?  I'll tell you what's ironic.  That the article was expected to reach an audience of intelligent people but subby got his hands on it.
 
2013-04-01 10:48:06 AM  
People who don't apologize are happier because being a b*tch/@$$hole is quite gratifying.
 
2013-04-01 10:48:33 AM  
You never really hear about unapologetic suicide notes.
 
2013-04-01 10:49:14 AM  
I have a habit of apologizing for everything even things that I have no control of what so ever.
/Aaah the life of a chronic worrier.
 
2013-04-01 10:49:20 AM  
People who never apologize are either...
 
Infallible, assholes or delusional.
 
I guess that all three can manifeast as happiness, in their own way.
 
2013-04-01 10:49:29 AM  
I'll only apologize if I'm actually sorry. If I'm not, get over it. Though sometimes I will to the wife just so she'll shut the fark up.
 
2013-04-01 10:49:41 AM  
Yeah, just make up justifications and excuses for your poor behavior. That's how you get to lord over people that YOU are RIGHT. That's the ticket.
 
2013-04-01 10:50:09 AM  
4.bp.blogspot.com
 
Never apologize. It's a sign of weakness.
 
/Someone beat me to it
//Don't care
///If you're going to quote the greatness that is Gibbs, you could at least post his stunning photo
 
2013-04-01 10:50:11 AM  
I am sure all of us have had instances where we did not do anything wrong and someone wanted an apology.  And there was no way we were going to give it to them.
 
2013-04-01 10:50:33 AM  

diaphoresis: People who don't apologize are happier because being a b*tch/@$$hole is quite gratifying do not feel they did anything wrong and so therefore see nothing to apologize for.

 
/Have known way too many of this sort. For which I'm sorry.
 
2013-04-01 10:51:39 AM  
Not apologizing doesn't go far enough. True assholishness can only be achieved by telling people to stop apologizing, or if they say they're sorry, reply, "no you're not".
 
2013-04-01 10:51:51 AM  
I notice the article did not cover the "I'm sorry your precious feelings are hurt" type of non-apology.
 
2013-04-01 10:52:02 AM  
John Belushi smashing a guitar disagrees.
 
2013-04-01 10:52:17 AM  

A Terrible Human: I have a habit of apologizing for everything even things that I have no control of what so ever.
/Aaah the life of a chronic worrier.


I am sorry you feel thay way.

/same affliction
 
2013-04-01 10:52:46 AM  

cheap_thoughts: I farked the guy my friend had a crush on. I really don't give a fark.


Apparently you did...
 
2013-04-01 10:53:00 AM  

Mirrorz: You never really hear about unapologetic suicide notes.


Who was the literary giant whose suicide note said simply 'I'm bored.'?
 
2013-04-01 10:53:02 AM  

mama2tnt: diaphoresis: People who don't apologize are happier because being a b*tch/@$$hole is quite gratifying do not feel they did anything wrong and so therefore see nothing to apologize for.
 
/Have known way too many of this sort. For which I'm sorry.


Yeah, me too.
 
//Knowing people like that, I'm not sorry I know them though.
 
2013-04-01 10:53:07 AM  

A Terrible Human: I have a habit of apologizing for everything even things that I have no control of what so ever.

 
Are you me? Actually, I started doing this about 3 years ago because it was easier to be sorry about everything and apologize immediately about any little thing before Master Justifyer make sure I knew anything and everything was my fault.
 
/became a Geisha for a bit there
//goddammit
 
2013-04-01 10:55:48 AM  
I think they've got their cause and effect backwards.  Self-absorbed asshats already feel superior to everybody else, which gives them a huge self-esteem/confidence boost.  Naturally, because they're superior, there's no need to apologize no matter how they might wrong somebody else.  Of course, as a consequence, they're absolutely horrible people to be around unless you're on the same "level" or above.  Since these kinds of people won't ever feel remorse on their own, the only ways to remind them that there are consequences to their actions are legal action or a good swift dose of pain.  I don't advocate living like a doormat, but for fark's sake, there's a good middle ground where you can respect yourself without making everybody around you miserable.
 
2013-04-01 10:57:14 AM  

had98c: or if they say they're sorry, reply, "no you're not".

 
Are you my wife?
 
Her favorite thing to say. "No you're not, if you were you wouldn't have done it". WTF does that even mean?
 
/Also doesn't apply if I say it to her.
//Apparently only I am incapable of being sorry.
///mostly true though. I'm kind of an asshole
 
2013-04-01 10:57:41 AM  

diaphoresis: People who don't apologize are happier because being a b*tch/@$$hole is quite gratifying.


Why is there an unresolvable mailto link in your post?
 
2013-04-01 10:58:39 AM  

BarkingUnicorn: diaphoresis: People who don't apologize are happier because being a b*tch/@$$hole is quite gratifying.

Why is there an unresolvable mailto link in your post?


It's because he put the goddamned "at" sign instead of spelling out biatch and asshole. Like an asshole.
 
2013-04-01 10:59:49 AM  
i.imgur.com
 
2013-04-01 11:01:24 AM  

NumberFiveIsAlive: cheap_thoughts: I farked the guy my friend had a crush on. I really don't give a fark.

Apparently you did...


The dude in question said hell no to her. She already has a lover, so she was just a "oh I feel good about myself, because he flirted with me!"deal.

It was the bar tender for christ sakes. That's his job! Flirt with the undesirable, get money. She thought he wanted more.
 
2013-04-01 11:01:56 AM  
This makes Dick Cheney the happiest man on earth
 
2013-04-01 11:02:55 AM  

BarkingUnicorn: diaphoresis: People who don't apologize are happier because being a b*tch/@$$hole is quite gratifying.

Why is there an unresolvable mailto link in your post?


because of the @
 
Welcome to the Internet... this is how e-mail works
 
2013-04-01 11:04:32 AM  
 
2013-04-01 11:04:55 AM  
"So the next time you tell your kids that apologizing will make them feel better in the long run"
 
I never told my kid that.  I told him that learning from his mistakes would make him feel better in the long run.  The apology is a pop quiz.
 
kab
2013-04-01 11:05:11 AM  
My experience is that the folks who never apologize tend to be the same ones who insist that they're never wrong.  About anything.
 
2013-04-01 11:05:25 AM  
 
2013-04-01 11:05:35 AM  
I'm Canadian, so I naturally apologize for everything.
 
2013-04-01 11:07:05 AM  

Nurglitch: I'm Canadian, so I naturally apologize for everything.


Can you apologize for Harper?
 
2013-04-01 11:07:14 AM  

abhorrent1: had98c: or if they say they're sorry, reply, "no you're not".
 
Are you my wife?
 
Her favorite thing to say. "No you're not, if you were you wouldn't have done it". WTF does that even mean?
 
/Also doesn't apply if I say it to her.
//Apparently only I am incapable of being sorry.
///mostly true though. I'm kind of an asshole


Haha that's awesome. I say the same thing, but only if it's another apology after doing the same thing multiple times. At that point you're either stupid, or doing it on purpose, so it actually ends up being a compliment because if you're indeed sorry for doing the same thing again and again and again, then you're a moron. I'd like to think the person is not a moron, but just an ass. Like me.
 
2013-04-01 11:07:18 AM  
I'm sorry I apologize for red lights and bad weather.
 
2013-04-01 11:11:25 AM  

kab: My experience is that the folks who never apologize tend to be the same ones who insist that they're never wrong.  About anything.


"I may not always be right, but I'm never wrong."  Benjamin J. Grimm.
 
2013-04-01 11:14:31 AM  
EMPATHY AND REMORSE ARE UN-AMERICAN
 
2013-04-01 11:16:21 AM  
Those poor Canadians must be miserable
 
2013-04-01 11:19:04 AM  
::sigh:: Another study that everyone will take out of context and base some conclusions upon their own bad assumptions.
 
TFA was under lab conditions.  They asked people to consider an action for which some people (those with more integrity/conscience) might have wanted to apologize. They then asked the people to write a fake email where they either apologized or refused to apologize.  Then, they asked them how they felt after writing the email.
 
So in what way does this translate to real life where you don't actively take time to force yourself to write a fake apology and you don't actively force yourself to consciously decide you have nothing to apologize for?  It doesn't. Your subconsious / your integrity don't involve much of your higher consciousness.
 
As always, lab experiments are a good indicator of how people respond under lab conditions.
 
2013-04-01 11:19:26 AM  
I don't know if I'm making up a trend, but I feel more and more often when I'm out at the store, or just walking down the street, even if I'm walking next to someone or stepping near someone (not even bumping into them) they are always quietly and meekishly saying "sorry!" It can be as simple as when someone is looking at a shelf of books in a store, and the person behind them is waiting or trying to see a particular item, the first person notices, and then says "sorry!" and steps out of the way. Why is that person apologizing? They aren't doing anything wrong. You don't have to say "I'm sorry" for every single interaction with someone that has a semblance of momentary inconvenience to someone else.
 
2013-04-01 11:23:00 AM  

MyKingdomForYourHorse: In third grade, I cheated on my history exam. In fourth grade, I stole my uncle Max's toupee and I glued it on my face when I was Moses in my Hebrew School play. In fifth grade, I knocked my sister Edie down the stairs and I blamed it on the dog... When my mom sent me to the summer camp for fat kids and then they served lunch I got nuts and I pigged out and they kicked me out... But the worst thing I ever done - I mixed a pot of fake puke at home and then I went to this movie theater, hid the puke in my jacket, climbed up to the balcony and then, t-t-then, I made a noise like this: hua-hua-hua-huaaaaaaa - and then I dumped it over the side, all over the people in the audience. And then, this was horrible, all the people started getting sick and throwing up all over each other. I never felt so bad in my entire life.


I think I'm starting to like this kid.
 
2013-04-01 11:23:08 AM  
Lots of infantile responses, today. 
Future press office speech writers for Democrat Party.
 
PS - Gibbs sucks. Faux man. Bluster, bluster, bluster. Mark Harmon should apologize for the character's utter lack of adult maturity.
 
2013-04-01 11:23:21 AM  

A Terrible Human: I have a habit of apologizing for everything even things that I have no control of what so ever.
/Aaah the life of a chronic worrier.

 
 
OMG, that's horrible!
 
I'm sorry.
 
2013-04-01 11:25:13 AM  
Was the article written by a sociopath?
 
Displayed 50 of 113 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report