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(MSNBC)   Dr. Ben Carson will no longer be speaking at Johns Hopkins after comparing gays to NAMBLA and people who want to have sex with turtles   (tv.msnbc.com) divider line 167
    More: Dumbass, NAMBLA, Dr. Ben Carson, Johns Hopkins, National Prayer Breakfasts, andrea mitchell, gay marriage ban, Presidential Medal of Freedom, gays  
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13239 clicks; posted to Main » on 29 Mar 2013 at 9:13 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Archived thread
2013-03-29 06:49:52 PM  
27 votes:
"What I was basically saying and if anyone was offended, I apologize to you. What I was basically saying is there is no group. I wasn't equating those things, I don't think they're equal. If you ask me for an apple and I give you an orange you would say, that's not an orange. And I say, that's a banana. And that's not an apple either. Or a peach, that's not an apple, either. It doesn't mean that I'm equating the banana and the orange and the peach. In the same way I'm not equating those things."

www.reactiongifs.com
2013-03-29 06:55:48 PM  
16 votes:
These f*ckwits get knocked off faster than an Al Qaeda #2 man
2013-03-30 12:05:09 AM  
14 votes:
One Cuil = One level of abstraction away from the reality of a situation.
Example: You ask me for a Hamburger.
1 Cuil: if you asked me for a hamburger, and I gave you a raccoon.
2 Cuils: If you asked me for a hamburger, but it turns out I don't really exist. Where I was originally standing, a picture of a hamburger rests on the ground.
3 Cuils: You awake as a hamburger. You start screaming only to have special sauce fly from your lips. The world is in sepia.
4 Cuils: Why are we speaking German? A mime cries softly as he cradles a young cow. Your grandfather stares at you as the cow falls apart into patties. You look down only to see me with pickles for eyes, I am singing the song that gives birth to the universe.
5 Cuils: You ask for a hamburger, I give you a hamburger. You raise it to your lips and take a bite. Your eye twitches involuntarily. Across the street a father of three falls down the stairs. You swallow and look down at the hamburger in your hands. I give you a hamburger. You swallow and look down at the hamburger in your hands. You cannot swallow. There are children at the top of the stairs. A pickle shifts uneasily under the bun. I give you a hamburger. You look at my face, and I am pleading with you. The children are crying now. You raise the hamburger to your lips, tears stream down your face as you take a bite. I give you a hamburger. You are on your knees. You plead with me to go across the street. I hear only children's laughter. I give you a hamburger. You are screaming as you fall down the stairs. I am your child. You cannot see anything. You take a bite of the hamburger. The concrete rushes up to meet you. You awake with a start in your own bed. Your eye twitches involuntarily. I give you a hamburger. As you kill me, I do not make a sound. I give you a hamburger.
6 Cuils: You ask me for a hamburger. My attempt to reciprocate is cut brutally short as my body experiences a sudden lack of electrons. Across a variety of hidden dimensions you are dismayed. John Lennon hands me an apple, but it slips through my fingers. I am reborn as an ocelot. You disapprove. A crack echoes through the universe in defiance of conventional physics as cosmological background noise shifts from randomness to a perfect A Flat. Children everywhere stop what they are doing and hum along in perfect pitch with the background radiation. Birds fall from the sky as the sun engulfs the earth. You hesitate momentarily before allowing yourself to assume the locus of all knowledge. Entropy crumbles as you peruse the information contained within the universe. A small library in Phoenix ceases to exist. You stumble under the weight of everythingness, Your mouth opens up to cry out, and collapses around your body before blinking you out of the spatial plane. You exist only within the fourth dimension. The fountainhead of all knowledge rolls along the ground and collides with a small dog. My head tastes sideways as spacetime is reestablished, you blink back into the corporeal world disoriented, only for me to hand you a hamburger as my body collapses under the strain of reconstitution. The universe has reasserted itself. A particular small dog is fed steak for the rest of its natural life. You die in a freak accident moments later, and you soul works at the returns desk for the Phoenix library. You disapprove. Your disapproval sends ripples through the inter-dimensional void between life and death. A small child begins to cry as he walks toward the stairway where his father stands.
7 Cuils: I give you a hamburger. The universe is engulfed within itself. A bus advertising hotdogs drives by a papillon. It disapproves. An unnatural force reverses Earth's gravity. You ask for a hamburger. I reciprocate with a mildly convulsing potato. You disapprove. Your disapproval releases a cosmic shift in the void between birth and life. You ask for a hamburger. A certain small dog feasts on hamburger patties for the rest of its unnatural, eternal endurance. Your constant disapproval sends silence through everything. A contrived beast becomes omnipotent. You ask for a hamburger. I give you a hamburger your body becomes an unsettled blob of nothingness, then divides by three. The papillon barks. The universe realigns itself. You, the papillon, and the hamburger disapprove. This condemnation stops the realignment. Hades freezes over. A pig is launched is launched into the unoccupied existence between space and time with a specific hamburger. You ask for a hamburger. I give you a hamburger. It screams as you lift it to your face. You laugh maniacally as I plead with you. You devour the hamburger as it pleads for mercy. I disapprove and condemn you to an eternity in a certain void where a certain pig and its specific hamburger are located. The Universal Space-time Continuum Committee disapproves of my irrational decision. You are locked away and are fed hamburgers for the rest of your natural existence. A pickle refuses to break down during the process of digestion. You die in a freak accident. A certain pickle lives the rest of its life in a comatose state. Your soul disapproves. Down the street a child cries as a hamburger gets stuck in, and climbs back up, her esophagus. You ask again for a hamburger. I refuse to reciprocate. You demand a lawyer. I remind you harshly that this is the new world order. Lawyers no longer exist. Only papillons. Your name is written on a list of sins. Blasphemy. You ask for a hamburger. The comatose pickle vanquishes your soul from this universe. Realignment occurs. You beg for a hamburger. A certain papillon's name is written on an obelisk in Egypt. Mumble. Peasants worship the obelisk. Your soulless corpse partakes in the festivity. Hamburgers are banned universally. The sun implodes. All planets cease to have ever existed. Mercury. Venus. Earth. Mars. Jupiter. Saturn. Uranus. Neptune. Pluto is the only mass in existence. Conveniently, you are on vacation here. Your need for hamburgers re-establishes space-time. Earth is recreated under your intergalactic rule. Hamburgers are your army. You wake up. Clowns. Clowns everywhere. Your dream rushes to meet you. You are kidnapped. You ask for a hamburger. They hand you a hotdog.
2013-03-29 06:44:05 PM  
11 votes:
Carson's comparison of gay relationships to pedophilia (NAMBLA stands for the North American Man/Boy Love Association) and bestiality has caused the pediatric neurosurgeon to fall from his perch as a Republican rising a star in recent days.

As many people as have occupied that position recently, it's like they coated that perch with axle grease.
2013-03-29 09:16:28 PM  
10 votes:
gregcookland.com
2013-03-29 10:31:31 PM  
8 votes:
Being the new Republican Superstar is a lot like being the new drummer for Spinal Tap.
2013-03-29 10:03:26 PM  
8 votes:
"What I was basically saying and if anyone was offended, I apologize to you. What I was basically saying is there is no group. I wasn't equating those things, I don't think they're equal. If you ask me for an apple and I give you an orange you would say, that's not an orange. And I say, that's a banana. And that's not an apple either.


i44.photobucket.com
2013-03-29 07:21:04 PM  
8 votes:

The_Sponge: I like turtles.


Well pretty soon you'll be able to marry one. Congrats. I am sure you'll be very happy together.
2013-03-29 09:33:42 PM  
7 votes:

gilgigamesh: The_Sponge: I like turtles.

Well pretty soon you'll be able to marry one. Congrats. I am sure you'll be very happy together.


4.bp.blogspot.com

Back off boys, he's spoken for.
2013-03-29 08:17:38 PM  
6 votes:

gilgigamesh: The_Sponge: I like turtles.

Well pretty soon you'll be able to marry one. Congrats. I am sure you'll be very happy together.


4.bp.blogspot.com
Combine NAMBLA and Turtle Farking and see what kind of sick deviance you get!
2013-03-30 02:28:03 AM  
5 votes:
Somewhere there's a neurosurgeon strapped to an operating table wondering how his identity got mixed up with his patient.
2013-03-29 10:35:06 PM  
5 votes:
Duh guys. When Jesus wrote the bible he wrote it in English (not Spanish lol) for a reason. He used the word marriage because that is a man and a woman being married. Before Jesus came there was no marriage. Christians invented it!

Now the gays want to change the definition? I don't think so.
2013-03-29 10:16:41 PM  
5 votes:
sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net

"But enough about George W. Bush."
2013-03-29 10:09:55 PM  
5 votes:
KrispyKritter: Dr clearly stated his opinion and was not making comparisons


Carson told FOX News host Sean Hannity Tuesday,

"My thoughts are that marriage is between a man and a woman.

It's a well-established, fundamental pillar of society and no group,

be they gays, be they NAMBLA, be they people who believe in bestiality-

it doesn't matter what they are-they don't get to change the definition."


What I was basically saying and if anyone was offended, I apologize to you.

What I was basically saying is there is no group.

I wasn't equating those things, I don't think they're equal.

If you ask me for an apple and I give you an orange you would say, that's not an orange.

And I say, that's a banana.

And that's not an apple either.

Or a peach, that's not an apple, either.

It doesn't mean that I'm equating the banana and the orange and the peach.

In the same way I'm not equating those things.



He's throwing an entire friggin basket of fruit at us and he's speaking clearly??

Would you mind relating to us hippie nosepickers just what clarity was in here?

I'm all slathered with fruit pulp here and am entertaining deep thoughts concerning yogurt.
2013-03-29 09:49:20 PM  
5 votes:
"What I was basically saying and if anyone was offended, I apologize to you. What I was basically saying is there is no group. I wasn't equating those things, I don't think they're equal. If you ask me for an apple and I give you an orange you would say, that's not an orange. And I say, that's a banana. And that's not an apple either. Or a peach, that's not an apple, either. It doesn't mean that I'm equating the banana and the orange and the peach. In the same way I'm not equating those things."

Neurosurgeon, heal thyself.
2013-03-29 08:53:46 PM  
5 votes:
Nonsensical rambling about fruits while non-apologizing about gay people?
2013-03-29 08:22:34 PM  
5 votes:
My belief is that marriage is between a white man and a white woman.  He doesn't get to change the definition.  Unless you're Abraham, in which case you can have sex with your slave Harah.  Or Solomon, in which case you can have 900 wives and a thousand concubines.  Wait, this is getting confusing.
2013-03-29 06:59:03 PM  
5 votes:

Relatively Obscure: "What I was basically saying and if anyone was offended, I apologize to you. What I was basically saying is there is no group. I wasn't equating those things, I don't think they're equal. If you ask me for an apple and I give you an orange you would say, that's not an orange. And I say, that's a banana. And that's not an apple either. Or a peach, that's not an apple, either. It doesn't mean that I'm equating the banana and the orange and the peach. In the same way I'm not equating those things."

[www.reactiongifs.com image 193x135]


img.photobucket.com
2013-03-29 10:52:29 PM  
4 votes:
upload.wikimedia.org

ballinyourcourt.files.wordpress.com
2013-03-29 10:31:03 PM  
4 votes:
"What I was basically saying and if anyone was offended, I apologize to you. What I was basically saying is there is no group. I wasn't equating those things, I don't think they're equal. If you ask me for an apple and I give you an orange you would say, that's not an orange. And I say, that's a banana. And that's not an apple either. Or a peach, that's not an apple, either. It doesn't mean that I'm equating the banana and the orange and the peach. In the same way I'm not equating those things."
i146.photobucket.com
2013-03-29 09:53:29 PM  
4 votes:

Benjimin_Dover: A person of color that thinks for him or herself is the scariest thing to a Dem


Which is why we didn't elect Obama twice.
2013-03-29 09:40:16 PM  
4 votes:

Great Janitor: Who here hasn't seen a sexy turtle and said "I wanna hit that?"  My wife won't let me keep a turtle in the house anymore after what I did to that last turtle.

/and it was consensual.


Yeah, but turtles are sluts, everyone knows that.
2013-03-29 09:26:55 PM  
4 votes:
"What I was basically saying and if anyone was offended, I apologize to you. What I was basically saying is there is no group. I wasn't equating those things, I don't think they're equal. If you ask me for an apple and I give you an orange you would say, that's not an orange. And I say, that's a banana. And that's not an apple either. Or a peach, that's not an apple, either. It doesn't mean that I'm equating the banana and the orange and the peach. In the same way I'm not equating those things."]

i159.photobucket.com
2013-03-29 06:53:01 PM  
4 votes:

Relatively Obscure: Carson's comparison of gay relationships to pedophilia (NAMBLA stands for the North American Man/Boy Love Association) and bestiality has caused the pediatric neurosurgeon to fall from his perch as a Republican rising a star in recent days.

As many people as have occupied that position recently, it's like they coated that perch with axle grease.


They pretty much greased it with their own shiat.
2013-03-30 03:42:37 AM  
3 votes:

Biological Ali: It may, however, cause one to read his statements in Morgan Freeman's voice.


Titty sprinkles.
2013-03-30 02:08:20 AM  
3 votes:
"What I was basically saying and if anyone was offended, I apologize to you. What I was basically saying is there is no group. I wasn't equating those things, I don't think they're equal. If you ask me for an apple and I give you an orange you would say, that's not an orange. And I say, that's a banana. And that's not an apple either. Or a peach...."

www.reactiongifs.com
2013-03-30 01:03:57 AM  
3 votes:
i think randumbjsa is a furry
2013-03-30 12:43:58 AM  
3 votes:
1.bp.blogspot.com

If you ask me for an apple and I give you an orange you would say, that's not an orange.
Your next stop, the Twilight Zone...!
2013-03-30 12:07:40 AM  
3 votes:
"When you're walking home tonight and some great homicidal maniac comes after you with a bunch of loganberries, don't come crying to me! Now, the passion fruit. When your assailant lunges at you with a passion fruit, thus..."
2013-03-29 11:08:32 PM  
3 votes:
FTFA: "What I was basically saying and if anyone was offended, I apologize to you. What I was basically saying is there is no group. I wasn't equating those things, I don't think they're equal. If you ask me for an apple and I give you an orange you would say, that's not an orange. And I say, that's a banana. And that's not an apple either. Or a peach, that's not an apple, either. It doesn't mean that I'm equating the banana and the orange and the peach. In the same way I'm not equating those things."

"What I'm basically saying is, you're all a bunch of fruits."
2013-03-29 10:53:46 PM  
3 votes:
img692.imageshack.us

"What I was basically saying and if anyone was offended, I apologize to you. What I was basically saying is there is no group. I wasn't equating those things, I don't think they're equal. If you ask me for an apple and I give you an orange you would say, that's not an orange. And I say, that's a banana. And that's not an apple either. Or a peach, that's not an apple, either. It doesn't mean that I'm equating the banana and the orange and the peach. In the same way I'm not equating those things."
2013-03-29 10:31:29 PM  
3 votes:

agb1953: Dr. Carson did not compare the 3 groups.  He listed the three groups as being those who fall in love but are not man/woman combinations.  In 2006 a Sudanese man married a goat, so there is precedent for his remark.


And when I say that Republicans, Nazis and braindead Extremist Muslims and Christian fundamentalists all have an irrational hatred of gays and wish to use governmental means to impose their asinine prejudices, I'm not comparing them,  I'm just making it clear that there is a similarity between the three groups that everyone can see.  No need for anyone to get offended by that statement at all.
2013-03-29 10:19:28 PM  
3 votes:

Kittypie070: KrispyKritter: Dr clearly stated his opinion and was not making comparisons


Carson told FOX News host Sean Hannity Tuesday,

"My thoughts are that marriage is between a man and a woman.

It's a well-established, fundamental pillar of society and no group,

be they gays, be they NAMBLA, be they people who believe in bestiality-

it doesn't matter what they are-they don't get to change the definition."

What I was basically saying and if anyone was offended, I apologize to you.

What I was basically saying is there is no group.

I wasn't equating those things, I don't think they're equal.

If you ask me for an apple and I give you an orange you would say, that's not an orange.

And I say, that's a banana.

And that's not an apple either.

Or a peach, that's not an apple, either.

It doesn't mean that I'm equating the banana and the orange and the peach.

In the same way I'm not equating those things.


He's throwing an entire friggin basket of fruit at us and he's speaking clearly??

Would you mind relating to us hippie nosepickers just what clarity was in here?

I'm all slathered with fruit pulp here and am entertaining deep thoughts concerning yogurt.


Well, that's the thing:  He got busted lumping gay people in with pedophiles and bestiality lovers and his reaction was to make a hasty apology and verbally shiat his pants in front of the world in the process.

I'm sure it started out sounding logical and rational in his head 'oh, I was just naming off groups, yeah, I wasn't actually comparing them to each other, ho ho ho' and his mouth opened up and fruit fell out and he started babbling and whoops, I crapped my pants.

Somewhere, the rich white leaders of the GOP are crying bitterly.
2013-03-29 10:16:52 PM  
3 votes:

Mrtraveler01: How can a brain surgeon be this stupid?


C'mon, he's only 3/5ths of a neurosurgeon, after all.
2013-03-29 09:33:13 PM  
3 votes:
Six week political career. Not bad.
2013-03-29 09:30:49 PM  
3 votes:

Relatively Obscure: "What I was basically saying and if anyone was offended, I apologize to you. What I was basically saying is there is no group. I wasn't equating those things, I don't think they're equal. If you ask me for an apple and I give you an orange you would say, that's not an orange. And I say, that's a banana. And that's not an apple either. Or a peach, that's not an apple, either. It doesn't mean that I'm equating the banana and the orange and the peach. In the same way I'm not equating those things."

[www.reactiongifs.com image 193x135]


I sincerely hope that Dr. Carson was treated for the stroke from which he was obviously suffering while he issued that statement.
2013-03-29 09:29:34 PM  
3 votes:

Mrtraveler01: Relatively Obscure: Carson's comparison of gay relationships to pedophilia (NAMBLA stands for the North American Man/Boy Love Association) and bestiality has caused the pediatric neurosurgeon to fall from his perch as a Republican rising a star in recent days.

As many people as have occupied that position recently, it's like they coated that perch with axle grease.

Wait, he was a rising star for the GOP? I haven't even heard of him until earlier this week.

Limbaugh: Ben Carson Has Democrats Scared To Death
2013-03-29 09:23:53 PM  
3 votes:

Mrtraveler01: Relatively Obscure: Carson's comparison of gay relationships to pedophilia (NAMBLA stands for the North American Man/Boy Love Association) and bestiality has caused the pediatric neurosurgeon to fall from his perch as a Republican rising a star in recent days.

As many people as have occupied that position recently, it's like they coated that perch with axle grease.

Wait, he was a rising star for the GOP? I haven't even heard of him until earlier this week.


Near as I can tell the Palin-Cain Cycle is gaining momentum and now running its course in slightly less than a week.
2013-03-29 09:20:51 PM  
3 votes:
"What I was basically saying and if anyone was offended, I apologize to you. What I was basically saying is there is no group. I wasn't equating those things, I don't think they're equal. If you ask me for an apple and I give you an orange you would say, that's not an orange. And I say, that's a banana. And that's not an apple either. Or a peach, that's not an apple, either. It doesn't mean that I'm equating the banana and the orange and the peach. In the same way I'm not equating those things."

This...THIS...is the new Republican superstar??!

God, Palin was more coherent.
2013-03-29 09:19:26 PM  
3 votes:
"What I was basically saying and if anyone was offended, I apologize to you. What I was basically saying is there is no group. I wasn't equating those things, I don't think they're equal. If you ask me for an apple and I give you an orange you would say, that's not an orange. And I say, that's a banana. And that's not an apple either. Or a peach, that's not an apple, either. It doesn't mean that I'm equating the banana and the orange and the peach. In the same way I'm not equating those things."

TLDR translation: "Potato..."
2013-03-29 08:11:31 PM  
3 votes:
As he should apologize. I fark GIRL turtles - the way God intended!
2013-03-29 07:01:53 PM  
3 votes:
I like turtles.
2013-03-30 10:13:24 AM  
2 votes:

Mrtraveler01: How can a brain surgeon be this stupid?


He's a homeschooled brain surgeon.  They practice on themselves.
2013-03-30 05:28:55 AM  
2 votes:

TheJoe03: /You really gotta question the thought process of people like this


i47.tinypic.com
2013-03-30 03:15:34 AM  
2 votes:

DrPainMD: I culled the quote FTFA where he compared gays wanting the right to get legally married to NAMBLA [wanting the right to legally marry] so I'm pretty sure you're full of shiat.


NAMBLA want the right to marry kids now?

Comparing two groups who want to have sex with (ie. not marry) others who legally can not consent with consenting adult gays wanting to marry as all being equally worthy of scorn isn't an insulting and ignorant comparison all of a sudden?

Wow, you're full of shiat today.

Have you considered Metamucil? Ex-lax? Prune juice, perhaps?
2013-03-30 02:52:33 AM  
2 votes:

CorporatePerson: Notabunny: I don't know about you, but I live in a basement and have no friends. Anonymously attacking internet strangers is as close to success as I'll ever get.

No joke, I have you Farkied as "makes detailed lists"


I don't recall revealing my superpower. I'll have to be more cautious. Thanks for the heads-up, citizen!
2013-03-30 02:49:15 AM  
2 votes:

Gawdzila: armoredbulldozer: .......and Obama the Imbecile is your hero?

I'd never hold any politician up as my personal hero.  But why exactly is Obama an imbecile?


Not just any imbecile.  He's the imbecile that made the GOP look REALLY STUPID in the last election finale.
2013-03-30 01:43:02 AM  
2 votes:

YodaTuna: at the moment.


So what you're saying is, there's hope.
2013-03-30 12:52:15 AM  
2 votes:
"What I was basically saying and if anyone was offended, I apologize to you. What I was basically saying is there is no group. I wasn't equating those things, I don't think they're equal. If you ask me for an apple and I give you an orange you would say, that's not an orange. And I say, that's a banana. And that's not an apple either. Or a peach, that's not an apple, either. It doesn't mean that I'm equating the banana and the orange and the peach. In the same way I'm not equating those things."
i.imgur.com
2013-03-30 12:42:30 AM  
2 votes:

garron: Liberal McCarthyism is in full effect.

 www.tucksbrand.com
2013-03-29 11:15:36 PM  
2 votes:
Deep thoughts concerning yogurt

i.imgur.com
2013-03-29 10:59:06 PM  
2 votes:
RIP BILL CARSON
www.wearysloth.com
DIED OF THIRST 1862
2013-03-29 10:34:41 PM  
2 votes:
www.maniacworld.com
2013-03-29 10:27:44 PM  
2 votes:
Just once, once I would like to go through a day and not think "WTF is wrong with people?"
2013-03-29 10:02:18 PM  
2 votes:

factoryconnection: Mrtraveler01: willfullyobscure: this man is also a Creationist. Your move, PZ MHuuurrryers

How can a brain surgeon be this stupid?

he's an artist with a blade with the capacity to memorize and apply vast swaths of medical knowledge.  None of that necessitates an understanding of radiometeic dating, evolution, or astrophysics.  Or maybe Jesus helped him through his totally shiatty childhood and he's bought off on the whole thing on the way to getting mad paper.


Nah

i4.ytimg.com
2013-03-29 09:52:04 PM  
2 votes:
Is it a five-assed turtle?
2013-03-29 09:50:36 PM  
2 votes:

sweet jeez: LETS NOT LISTEN TO HIM HES PROBABLY THE MOST GIFTED BLACK MAN ON THE PLANET RIGHT NOW OOO I FORGOT YOU CANT BE A GIFTED BLACK MAN IF YOU NOT A DEM KIND OF LIKE MLK YOU KNOW HE WAS ON THE RIGHT TO BUT THOSE PISKY MORALS AND THE WHOLE GOD THING ........STUPID ME


The fark are you going on about?

And what's with the all CAPS? This is Fark, not some mid-nineties AOL chat room.
2013-03-29 09:45:41 PM  
2 votes:
If you ask me for an apple and I give you an orange you would say, that's not an orange.

I am still trying to decipher this profound yet complex axiom.

Why would you say an orange that I just gave you is not an orange even if you asked for an apple? and how would a non orange orange become a peach afterward even though it may have been originally an apple all along? this is deep folks deep!!
2013-03-29 09:44:07 PM  
2 votes:
Just because I have a sign that says "Dogs and Blacks Not Allowed," it doesn't mean I'm equating blacks and dogs. Heavans no! Those are just two unrelated things that happen to not be allowed. Totally different.
2013-03-29 09:41:09 PM  
2 votes:
The GOP's Great Black Hope Dope goes down!
2013-03-29 09:39:21 PM  
2 votes:

Benjimin_Dover: Mrtraveler01: Relatively Obscure: Carson's comparison of gay relationships to pedophilia (NAMBLA stands for the North American Man/Boy Love Association) and bestiality has caused the pediatric neurosurgeon to fall from his perch as a Republican rising a star in recent days.

As many people as have occupied that position recently, it's like they coated that perch with axle grease.

Wait, he was a rising star for the GOP? I haven't even heard of him until earlier this week.

No, he isn't a rising star except in the minds of the libs who apparently dropped a collective load in their pants when he dared open his mouth and utter anything other than what they think he should have said at the prayer breakfast.  A person of color that thinks for him or herself is the scariest thing to a Dem and they must always be targetted for destruction usually with Uncle Tom type terminology.


Somebody didn't get the memo from Rush Limbaugh (see link above).
2013-03-29 09:35:25 PM  
2 votes:
You know, when I Google a phrase that starts "sex with ..." I expect to see some sick pron on the first page of hits at least. Google is a site have I come to trust to do its job and find weird shiat.

But apparently sex with turtles is so rare that even the web has a hard time coughing up examples. Maybe it has something to do with such hits as "turles have terrifying penises" or "how to tell if a turtle is male or female" or "Dr. Ben Carson has sex with turtles", which at least gets hits about Dr. Ben.
2013-03-29 09:34:10 PM  
2 votes:
I had to read Gifted Hands in my 10th grade English class. All I got from it was how unbelievable it was that Ben Carson had a fat AND ugly wife while being 1)a doctor, and 2)"Gifted" with his hands.

But now I get it, who else would want to fark this tool.
2013-03-29 09:33:37 PM  
2 votes:

Mrtraveler01: Relatively Obscure: Carson's comparison of gay relationships to pedophilia (NAMBLA stands for the North American Man/Boy Love Association) and bestiality has caused the pediatric neurosurgeon to fall from his perch as a Republican rising a star in recent days.

As many people as have occupied that position recently, it's like they coated that perch with axle grease.

Wait, he was a rising star for the GOP? I haven't even heard of him until earlier this week.


No, he isn't a rising star except in the minds of the libs who apparently dropped a collective load in their pants when he dared open his mouth and utter anything other than what they think he should have said at the prayer breakfast.  A person of color that thinks for him or herself is the scariest thing to a Dem and they must always be targetted for destruction usually with Uncle Tom type terminology.
2013-03-29 09:30:51 PM  
2 votes:
Who here hasn't seen a sexy turtle and said "I wanna hit that?"  My wife won't let me keep a turtle in the house anymore after what I did to that last turtle.

/and it was consensual.
2013-03-29 09:27:19 PM  
2 votes:
They chase after me, man. They chase after me!

/Thanks, Smokey!
2013-03-29 09:26:10 PM  
2 votes:

SuperNinjaToad: "What I was basically saying and if anyone was offended, I apologize to you. What I was basically saying is there is no group. I wasn't equating those things, I don't think they're equal. If you ask me for an apple and I give you an orange you would say, that's not an orange. And I say, that's a banana. And that's not an apple either. Or a peach, that's not an apple, either. It doesn't mean that I'm equating the banana and the orange and the peach. In the same way I'm not equating those things."


So, he's got Rick Santorum's social conservatism, Steve Forbes' fiscal plans (a flat tax), and Sarah Palin's gift for making up sentences that make as much sense when read forward or backward.

/But he's blah, so he's certain to capture the blah vote, the same way Palin brought in the female vote. . .
2013-03-29 09:24:50 PM  
2 votes:
Farking brain surgeon needs a farking brain.
2013-03-29 09:24:11 PM  
2 votes:

Mrtraveler01: Wait, he was a rising star for the GOP? I haven't even heard of him until earlier this week.


The criteria for "rising star" isn't very stringent these days.
2013-03-29 08:47:52 PM  
2 votes:

syrynxx: kxs401: I love that republicans also fail to recognize that the definition of marriage has changed quite a bit over the last couple of millennia.

It's changed over the last hundred years or so.  120 years ago I could've had my bipolar wife committed for life to a mental institution because she was considered a piece of property.  Judaic, Muslim, and Hindu laws regard women as male property.  The world would be a much better place without a trace of religion.  It makes intelligent people think stupid things.


Worse, it makes stupid people think they're intelligent.
And intelligently designed.
2013-03-29 08:15:19 PM  
2 votes:

revrendjim: Relatively Obscure: "What I was basically saying and if anyone was offended, I apologize to you. What I was basically saying is there is no group. I wasn't equating those things, I don't think they're equal. If you ask me for an apple and I give you an orange you would say, that's not an orange. And I say, that's a banana. And that's not an apple either. Or a peach, that's not an apple, either. It doesn't mean that I'm equating the banana and the orange and the peach. In the same way I'm not equating those things."

Sometimes a banana is just a banana.


God's greatest creation.
2013-03-29 07:52:13 PM  
2 votes:
 If you ask me for an apple and I give you an orange you would say, that's not an orange. And I say, that's a banana. And that's not an apple either. Or a peach, that's not an apple, either. It doesn't mean that I'm equating the banana and the orange and the peach. In the same way I'm not equating those things."

And this is what passes for intelligence in the GOP.
2013-03-29 07:37:29 PM  
2 votes:

Relatively Obscure: "What I was basically saying and if anyone was offended, I apologize to you. What I was basically saying is there is no group. I wasn't equating those things, I don't think they're equal. If you ask me for an apple and I give you an orange you would say, that's not an orange. And I say, that's a banana. And that's not an apple either. Or a peach, that's not an apple, either. It doesn't mean that I'm equating the banana and the orange and the peach. In the same way I'm not equating those things."

[www.reactiongifs.com image 193x135]


Truly, this brilliant man is the Terror of the Left.
2013-03-29 06:41:07 PM  
2 votes:
I said after twice.

/I like after
//Guess he can cross his name off the top candidates list
///And move it to the future TV analyst list
2013-03-31 03:49:55 PM  
1 votes:

Biological Ali: BraveNewCheneyWorld: Biological Ali:

You are not now, nor have you ever been mildly amusing or intelligent. Put me on your ignore list, and kindly fark off.

You won't get very far in comedy and satire if you're this thin-skinned - you need to be able to handle criticisms of your work. If you can't help but to take every critique so personally, perhaps this isn't the field for you.


I'm not thin skinned, you're just an annoying, obnoxious, asshole.  You literally follow me around this site repeating the same thing over and over.  It's rare that you actually engage in a meaningful conversation, you just keep repeating your same shtick and scream that anyone who doesn't agree with your world view is a troll.  Quite honestly, it must suck to be you if following me around on fark.com is the best of the options available to you.

Dansker: Straight couples are allowed to marry regardless of fertility and possession of sexual organs. If ability to procreate with their partner isn't a requirement for heterosexual marriage, why should it be so with homosexual?


It's assumed they can reproduce because the vast majority can.  With a homosexual couple, there is never a chance greater than 0%.  That's a pretty staggering difference.  This really shouldn't have to be explained to you.

Dansker: Besides, with the current state of fertility research and cloning technology it's at the very least theoretically, scientifically possible to produce a fertilized egg carrying genetic material from two male progenitors.


It's also theoretically, scientifically possible to produce a fertilized egg carrying genetic material with a human and a monkey.  What's your point?
2013-03-31 12:56:12 PM  
1 votes:

BraveNewCheneyWorld: Dansker: Valid?
Sex is about closeness, enjoyment, pleasure, eroticism, love, lust and desire.

Some would describe chocolate as providing those sensations, that's not an appropriate rationale for a government enforced contract that leads to a stronger nation, however.


encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com
2013-03-31 01:21:44 AM  
1 votes:

Thunderpipes: You are a far left liberal. This is news that you support Obama?


Yes, it is. Because Obama is about as far left as you are an underage Indian boy selling me chickens. Smack yourself with a brick to shake that sand out of your head. Obama is as liberal as I am Kei$ha.
2013-03-30 11:45:23 PM  
1 votes:
Most homosexuals think they'll be able to marry foreign orphan boys and keep them in their houses as "spouses". That is the main motivation behind all of this homosexual wedding bullshiat. A friend of mine who is a homo who is attracted to adult males and who opposes homosexual marriage explained this fact to me.
2013-03-30 07:39:51 PM  
1 votes:

SkinnyHead: cameroncrazy1984: SkinnyHead: If Virginia's anti-miscegenation law changed the definition of marriage to mean that marriage is defined as the union of two white people or two black people, then Mildred and Richard Loving could say that their interracial marriage was not in violation of the law, because it was not a "marriage" within the definition of the law.

That makes zero sense. Marriage is a legal construct. If your marriage falls outside of the legal construct then it is not defined as a marriage. If you change the marriage law, the construct is changed. The definition is changed.

I don't know how you're not getting this.

It makes perfect sense.  The Virginia law made it a crime for a white person to intermarry with a black person.  As with every criminal law, you have to ask, what is the definition of the prohibited act (i.e, to marry)?  If the legal definition of "to marry" was to unite in matrimony with someone of the same race (as you claim), then they could not have been convicted because they did not do what the law prohibits.  They were convicted because what the did was defined as marriage. That means that race was not part of the actual definition of marriage.


"It's against the law to marry someone not of your race, therefore race has nothing to do with the definition of marriage."

At this point you've gone over into parody. There's no way you can actually be this stupid.
2013-03-30 07:33:59 PM  
1 votes:

SkinnyHead: If the legal definition of "to marry" was to unite in matrimony with someone of the same race (as you claim), then they could not have been convicted because they did not do what the law prohibits.  They were convicted because what the did was defined as marriage. That means that race was not part of the actual definition of marriage.


You seem to think that marriage, which exists as a legal entity, does not exist as a legal entity.
2013-03-30 07:23:53 PM  
1 votes:

SkinnyHead: But Progressives in the eugenics movement in their day insisted that they had science on their side and that they were on the right side of history.


The thing they overlooked is that science, unlike God, isn't on anyone's "side."

It's God's job to approach me if he wants my attention or my praise.  But it's my responsibility to pursue science, if I want to use its tools to improve my understanding of reality.

Put another way, God might come to me in the form of a hallucination in the desert, but Truth is a mirage on the horizon that I can approach but never reach.  It's no wonder that so many people take the easy way out with the God thing.  We're lazy creatures.
2013-03-30 04:30:29 PM  
1 votes:

BraveNewCheneyWorld: My argument about reproduction


A yes, I forgot the third category: Authentic Frontier Gibberish.
2013-03-30 03:01:09 PM  
1 votes:
Came to catch up on the latest.

Found SkinHead.

Leaving to scrape scum from skin several times.

Then I'm going to do the Stanford-Binet (r) to see how many IQ points I lost through exposure.
2013-03-30 01:34:32 PM  
1 votes:
Hm, just checking the inventory, I have one (1) turtle. and at least twelve (12) gay friends who of course have other gay friends.  Should I become a madame and maybe open my own "house"?  I'm sure that with the proper marketing tools my little home business just might take off.  Maybe I should hire a consultant, get some focus groups going or something.  After that, all I'd need to do is print business cards, put up flyers and open the doors to the all new amphibian Moulin Rouge.  I may even be able to book the singing frog from the old Merrie Melodies cartoons to do a cabaret act.

/I kid. anyone who touches my turtle inappropriately would be dealt with very harshly up to and including having their arse kicked and thrown out of my house
2013-03-30 12:03:27 PM  
1 votes:
I Hindenburged Myself With Birf Certificit!: I watched the whole program so i know it's true!

I ate the whole bag so I know it's healthy!

I _____ the whole _______ so I know it's [true, beneficial, genuine, etc.]!

i.imgur.com
2013-03-30 10:25:51 AM  
1 votes:

Silly Jesus: nocturnal001: Silly Jesus: Mrtraveler01: Silly Jesus: Mrtraveler01: Silly Jesus: I liked his 10% flat tax idea.

Ah, so he can't do math either huh?

Unless this is an additional tax, which in that case is heresy in the GOP.

Flat taxes aren't math?  Potato?

That's the kind of thinking one has to have to think that a 10% flat tax is sustainable.

These 41 countries with a flat tax might be interested in your expertise.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flat_tax#Countries_that_have_flat_tax_s ys tems

It's not that flat taxes can't work, but rather that the plans we usually see claim to be our solution yet never bother to actually do the math. It seems like these guys just pick a percent that sounds good and run with it.

In the absence of spending cuts, lowering one person's taxes means you have to raise somebody else's.

Good.  We can raise a hell of a lot of people's taxes from 0%.


Damn those deductions!

You know the flat tax would have to be close to 30% in order for it to be revenue neutral right?
2013-03-30 10:09:16 AM  
1 votes:

Kittypie070: dickfreckle: Kittypie070: Ohhhh....can I steal that phrase?

Kittypie, everything I own belongs to you!

/except my dog

Squeeeeeeeeeeeeee


My dog loves cats, and tries to face-hump other male dogs. Perhaps we can work something out. Right now he's on the balcony whimpering desperately at one of the feral cats we feed. Am pretty sure he's bisexual but also doesn't understand that he's supposed to stick to his species. Damn, dude. At least keep it in the family.

/retarded mutt with a heart of gold
2013-03-30 08:24:57 AM  
1 votes:

BraveNewCheneyWorld: Homosexuality is no more or less deviant than the others, it's just not illegal because it's an act that can be engaged with the consent of two adult humans.   Of course you people need to silence anyone mentioning this or any other valid comparison on the national stage, because you can't have anyone get in the way of your efforts to conflate 'legal' with 'moral'.   If you were in the right, you wouldn't need such organized efforts to silence your opponents anyone who isn't in lockstep agreement with you.


Pointing and laughing at people with views on sexuality from the Middle Ages is not silencing them. Such people have been getting quite a bit of attention lately, actually. It's just that people aren't afraid to tell people like you to fark off when they judge what other adults do in the bedroom.

Sir, go fark yourself.
2013-03-30 08:21:11 AM  
1 votes:

BraveNewCheneyWorld: Of course you people need to silence anyone mentioning this or any other valid comparison on the national stage, because you can't have anyone get in the way of your efforts to conflate 'legal' with 'moral'.   If you were in the right, you wouldn't need such organized efforts to silence your opponents anyone who isn't in lockstep agreement with you.


You poor delicate flower you.

People though interracial marriages were just as deviant back in the day, deviance is a matter of opinion and not actually based on anything concrete.
2013-03-30 08:17:07 AM  
1 votes:

Mrtraveler01: garron: Liberal McCarthyism is in full effect.

Wait, how is this liberal McCarthyism again?


I have a list. And in this list it has all the names of republicans that are going to say something racist, sexist (or rapey) or homophobic between now and 2016.

Spoiler: This list contains everyone that is a member of the RNC.

;)
2013-03-30 08:16:23 AM  
1 votes:

TheJoe03: DrPainMD: The conservative position (as opposed to the Republican [i.e., not conservative] position) on marriage is that the government is merely a keeper of records, and who marries whom is a private matter left to free people.

That doesn't make sense, care to clarify? Conservatives are traditionalists that support the old institutions, so how does it make sense that their view on marriage would support gay marriage in any way?  This is a social issue, so the the kind of conservatism that is relevant to this topic would be the social kind. Maybe you mean libertarian.


Libertarians are the only conservatives left. Republicans certainly aren't conservative. On this issue, they are no better than the Progressives who brought us laws against interracial marriage.
2013-03-30 08:02:49 AM  
1 votes:

DrPainMD: The conservative position (as opposed to the Republican [i.e., not conservative] position) on marriage is that the government is merely a keeper of records, and who marries whom is a private matter left to free people.


That doesn't make sense, care to clarify? Conservatives are traditionalists that support the old institutions, so how does it make sense that their view on marriage would support gay marriage in any way?  This is a social issue, so the the kind of conservatism that is relevant to this topic would be the social kind. Maybe you mean libertarian.
2013-03-30 07:32:35 AM  
1 votes:

Cloudchaser Sakonige the Red Wolf: He should have just said "Any group does not get to determine society's definition of that group" which is what I think he was trying to say and left it at that without mentioning nambla or bestiality.


Any group?

It's not just gays who think gay people deserve to be treated like equals.

For the longest time bigots outnumbered gays and their political allies but the times they are a'changing.

If you want to stay on the wrong side of morality, justice and history that's your right just like it's my right to come onto an anonymous internet forum and point and laugh at you till you STFU or have an epiphany.

K?

/Also, although you are probably unaware you are just making the same arguments anti-race mixing bigots were making back in the 60s if you just substitute "gays wanting to marry" with "blacks wanting to marry whites".
//Didn't work then and it aint gonna work now but go on make an ass of yourself. It amuses me to see you fail.
///My other hobbies include watching moths bump their heads on light bulbs till they fall to the ground.
2013-03-30 07:07:05 AM  
1 votes:
"What I was basically saying and if anyone was offended, I apologize to you. What I was basically saying is there is no group. I wasn't equating those things, I don't think they're equal. If you ask me for an apple and I give you an orange you would say, that's not an orange. And I say, that's a banana. And that's not an apple either. Or a peach, that's not an apple, either. It doesn't mean that I'm equating the banana and the orange and the peach. In the same way I'm not equating those things."

Doc, if you want to be a contender in the Republican party, you're gonna have to learn to slight a much higher quality bullshiat.
2013-03-30 07:02:02 AM  
1 votes:

DrPainMD: Nowhere does he say that NAMBLA wants to get married, nor does he compare NAMBLA members to gays. It's not there.


You said that, dumbshiat, in the post you just quoted.

Gawd, yer thicker than the proverbial brick aren't you?

You are either a troll or incapable of intellectual honesty or simple reading comprehension.
2013-03-30 06:45:45 AM  
1 votes:

DrPainMD: I was just pointing out that he didn't say what subby, the article, and almost every post in this thread say he said. Anybody who says otherwise doesn't I don't understand the English language on a 3rd grade level.


Fixed.
2013-03-30 06:41:25 AM  
1 votes:
"What I was basically saying and if anyone was offended, I apologize to you. What I was basically saying is there is no group. I wasn't equating those things, I don't think they're equal. If you ask me for an apple and I give you an orange you would say, that's not an orange. And I say, that's a banana. And that's not an apple either. Or a peach, that's not an apple, either. It doesn't mean that I'm equating the banana and the orange and the peach. In the same way I'm not equating those things."

i560.photobucket.com
2013-03-30 06:17:30 AM  
1 votes:

Kittypie070: Gyrfalcon: Kittypie070: Deep thoughts concerning yogurt

[i.imgur.com image 600x450]

But is it fruit yogurt? I like fruit yogurt.

I have the feeling it's some Scandinavian-area clabbered dairy product.


It's cat yogurt.

/Cat on the top, so you don't have to stir.
2013-03-30 05:45:16 AM  
1 votes:

Raharu: At least you tried.


Wait, the white supremacist called a black guy "Ineloquent"? Hah. Next up will be "He's not so well-spoken, but he's one of the good ones."
2013-03-30 03:41:42 AM  
1 votes:

Huck And Molly Ziegler: Being an older black doctor doesn't automatically give you the wisdom of a Morgan Freeman character.


It may, however, cause one to read his statements in Morgan Freeman's voice.
2013-03-30 03:39:27 AM  
1 votes:
Carson's comparison of gay relationships to pedophilia (NAMBLA stands for the North American Man/Boy Love Association) and bestiality has caused the pediatric neurosurgeon to fall from his perch as a Republican rising a star in recent days.

Well, these must be Opposite Days, because in normal reality what he said and the "clever" way he said it should push him UP TO that perch.

Being an older black doctor doesn't automatically give you the wisdom of a Morgan Freeman character.
2013-03-30 03:30:50 AM  
1 votes:
Carson picked a bad week to get knee-deep into the political arena.....

In Supreme Court, anti-gay movement is humiliated
by Irin Carmon
Salon.com
March 28, 2013
2013-03-30 03:28:45 AM  
1 votes:

Biological Ali: You do realize you're being trolled, right?


Are you saying a Farker with a handle like that is something less than legit?

Well, I never!
2013-03-30 03:17:36 AM  
1 votes:

quatchi: Have you considered Metamucil? Ex-lax? Prune juice, perhaps?


I'm not going to quote him, but I think we've found Dr Carson's Fark handle.
2013-03-30 03:08:21 AM  
1 votes:
If the organized religions want to not recognize gay marriage, fine, but the government shouldn't get into discriminating based on sexual preference. marriage as a government institution is all about benefits and taxes, not about religious tradition; it does not matter one farking bit to the IRS or Social Security Administration what gender everyone is, as long as they're paying their dues. We as a nation shouldn't be wasting time deciding who deserves what freedom when we've already established that all men (mankind includes women, pedants) are created equal.
2013-03-30 02:43:48 AM  
1 votes:

armoredbulldozer: .......and Obama the Imbecile is your hero?


I'd never hold any politician up as my personal hero.  But why exactly is Obama an imbecile?
2013-03-30 02:33:48 AM  
1 votes:

armoredbulldozer: Speaker2Animals: If you ask me for an apple and I give you an orange you would say, that's not an orange. And I say, that's a banana. And that's not an apple either. Or a peach, that's not an apple, either. It doesn't mean that I'm equating the banana and the orange and the peach. In the same way I'm not equating those things."

And this is what passes for intelligence in the GOP.

.......and Obama the Imbecile is your hero?  Or have you "evolved?"


Why would you think we hold elected officials as heroes? Oh, wait. You're a Republican.
2013-03-30 02:19:18 AM  
1 votes:

randomjsa: So we're now up to "two days running"...

I said it would take a week for you to get around to whining about how hateful Republicans were after one of your own went on a bigoted little tirade to the cheer and adoration of more than a few.

It took you two days, and now we're on day three and you're doing it again. I should really learn to stop underestimating you people.

Incidentally that feeling of validation you have for catching this guy saying something unpopular in no way changes the fact that he's been handing you your rears on a silver platter on most of what you believe in.

Or really, I could just behave like you do when somebody is critical of Obama... You're obviously just a bunch of racists trying to keep a well spoken and intelligent black man down.

Oh and we haven't forgotten how "nicely" you treated the black actress for supporting Romney as the good and open minded liberals spewed racist hate speech at her.

But Carson said something bad, you go on, feel good about yourselves.


Ladies and gentlemen this what a dumb person sounds like when they try to be smug.
2013-03-30 01:33:14 AM  
1 votes:

skullkrusher: Kittypie070: i think randumbjsa is a furry

think or hope, Kitty? ;)


Dunno, my readings of the emitted derpfield are inconclusive.

Aside from that, vichyssoise.
2013-03-30 01:22:59 AM  
1 votes:
"My thoughts are that marriage is between a man and a woman. It's a well-established, fundamental pillar of society and no group, be they gays, be they NAMBLA, be they people who believe in bestiality-it doesn't matter what they are-they don't get to change the definition."

Yeah, that's equating.

Good on the Johns Hopkins students and faculty for raising a stink about his invite to speak at commencement.

randomjsa: ...Carson said something bad...

Indeed.
2013-03-30 01:02:53 AM  
1 votes:

Ima4nic8or: Why must we always destroy anyone who has an unpopular position? Let the guy speak. How could it hurt?


I don't know about you, but I live in a basement and have no friends. Anonymously attacking internet strangers is as close to success as I'll ever get. Your mom dresses you funny.
2013-03-30 01:02:06 AM  
1 votes:

garron: Liberal McCarthyism is in full effect.


YYyyyesssSS??!

Oh, PLEASE, mon frere, DO go on, you little cutie!!
2013-03-30 01:00:45 AM  
1 votes:

randomjsa: I said it would take a week for you to get around to whining about how hateful Republicans were after one of your own went on a bigoted little tirade to the cheer and adoration of more than a few.


Wait, I'm lost here.

randomjsa: Incidentally that feeling of validation you have for catching this guy saying something unpopular in no way changes the fact that he's been handing you your rears on a silver platter on most of what you believe in.


Wait, he has?

randomjsa: Oh and we haven't forgotten how "nicely" you treated the black actress for supporting Romney as the good and open minded liberals spewed racist hate speech at her.


The one I didn't care who she supported?

Eh whatever, go back to feeling persecuted. God knows what you'd do to yourself without that persecution complex of yours.
2013-03-30 12:54:05 AM  
1 votes:

garron: Liberal McCarthyism is in full effect.


Wait, how is this liberal McCarthyism again?
2013-03-30 12:48:35 AM  
1 votes:

garron: I might as well toss in the buzzwords "Uncle Tom" and "Democrat plantation" too while I'm obeying my programming.


Oh, so John Birchers are granola snorting hippies now, huh?

What did I just f*ckin say about the TWILIGHT ZONE, boy!!??
2013-03-30 12:35:11 AM  
1 votes:

Cymbal: sweet jeez: LETS NOT LISTEN TO HIM HES PROBABLY THE MOST GIFTED BLACK MAN ON THE PLANET RIGHT NOW OOO I FORGOT YOU CANT BE A GIFTED BLACK MAN IF YOU NOT A DEM KIND OF LIKE MLK YOU KNOW HE WAS ON THE RIGHT TO BUT THOSE PISKY MORALS AND THE WHOLE GOD THING ........STUPID ME

The fark are you going on about?

And what's with the all CAPS? This is Fark, not some mid-nineties AOL chat room.


It's a desperate attempt to get on people's ignored lists.
2013-03-30 12:20:44 AM  
1 votes:
Any more fruit and I could make a mean salad!
2013-03-30 12:12:40 AM  
1 votes:

gilgigamesh: The_Sponge: I like turtles.

Well pretty soon you'll be able to marry one. Congrats. I am sure you'll be very happy together.

>

No matter how they tossed the dice, it had to be. Turtles.
2013-03-30 12:10:39 AM  
1 votes:

SuperNinjaToad: If you ask me for an apple and I give you an orange you would say, that's not an orange.

I am still trying to decipher this profound yet complex axiom.

Why would you say an orange that I just gave you is not an orange even if you asked for an apple? and how would a non orange orange become a peach afterward even though it may have been originally an apple all along? this is deep folks deep!!


Dr. Ben Carson has a lot to teach us about how to defend yourself from fresh fruit. What if a gay guy comes at you with a crate of raspberries?
2013-03-30 12:02:47 AM  
1 votes:
2013-03-30 12:00:59 AM  
1 votes:

MBooda: Betcha that doesn't include jizyah.


Jizyah? I hardly even know yah!
2013-03-29 11:39:02 PM  
1 votes:

Void_Beavis: Kittypie070: Deep thoughts concerning yogurt

D'aww.

Are kittens crunchy when you eat them despite their soft, furry shell?

These are the questions the bastard part of my brain demand answers to every day.


Uh, they're tender all the way through, it's only the little bones that are crunchy.

/these are the kinda questions that kept me outta Harvard -- George Carlin
2013-03-29 11:34:19 PM  
1 votes:

Type_Hard: "What I was basically saying and if anyone was offended, I apologize to you. What I was basically saying is there is no group. I wasn't equating those things, I don't think they're equal. If you ask me for an apple and I give you an orange you would say, that's not an orange. And I say, that's a banana. And that's not an apple either. Or a peach, that's not an apple, either. It doesn't mean that I'm equating the banana and the orange and the peach. In the same way I'm not equating those things."

TLDR translation: "Potato..."


No... Recycled corn.
2013-03-29 11:28:53 PM  
1 votes:
ecx.images-amazon.com
2013-03-29 11:24:30 PM  
1 votes:
Can the the last person who supports the GOP just shut the lights off on their way out.  Thanks.
2013-03-29 11:22:12 PM  
1 votes:

cptjeff: Infernalist: ghare: EmmaLou: cptjeff: EmmaLou: Just once, once I would like to go through a day and not think "WTF is wrong with people?"

Try going camping. A nice backpacking or canoe trip in a remote wilderness is a good way to get away from the derp. And everything else, really.

I've been seriously considering that.  I think being disconnected for a few days with definitely help.

Get a good tent. I mean really.

Rustics.

Seriously, if you need to get away, go get a hotel room for a week on the beach.   The woods are full of dirt, trees and animals.

And campfires, and waking up right next to a beautiful stream, and no TV to distract, lots of birdsong, air that smells nice, no cars, no stupid electronic noises and beeping...

You can bring a fly rod along and add fresh fish to the deal if you like, cooked right on that campfire even.

Seriously, if you have access to a car, internet, TV, and your smartphone, you aren't really getting away.


I like being in the woods.  My wife thinks its full of bugs and dirt and trees.  She likes nice hotels, so I stay in them a lot.  And I will admit that as nice as a quiet forest glade is, there is something to be said about room service.

/ Hotel del Coronado, here I come...
2013-03-29 11:07:53 PM  
1 votes:
i.imgur.com
2013-03-29 11:06:01 PM  
1 votes:

Silly Jesus: Mrtraveler01: Silly Jesus: Mrtraveler01: Silly Jesus: I liked his 10% flat tax idea.

Ah, so he can't do math either huh?

Unless this is an additional tax, which in that case is heresy in the GOP.

Flat taxes aren't math?  Potato?

That's the kind of thinking one has to have to think that a 10% flat tax is sustainable.

These 41 countries with a flat tax might be interested in your expertise.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flat_tax#Countries_that_have_flat_tax_s ys tems


Holy shiat dude, did you even read that list?  Name five countries on that list with a 10% flat tax rate that you'd want to live in rather than the U.S.A.
2013-03-29 10:50:37 PM  
1 votes:
I had absolutely no idea that you could be a complete idiot and become a neurosurgeon.  Dammit, I so missed out on an easy career path!

"If you ask me for an apple and I give you an orange you would say, that's not an orange."

I wouldn't want this guy anywhere near my brain.  He already hurts it over the internet!
2013-03-29 10:44:58 PM  
1 votes:

agb1953: Dr. Carson did not compare the 3 groups.  He listed the three groups as being those who fall in love but are not man/woman combinations.  In 2006 a Sudanese man married a goat, so there is precedent for his remark.


When it's a Republican, one should refer to him using his full title, such as DOCTOR Carson and DOCTOR Paul, but when it's someone from the "Democrat Party," someone with a title is a liberal elite who should be shunned and told that he/she is not a Real 'merrican.
2013-03-29 10:44:13 PM  
1 votes:
By the way, Republicans, you are failing into the trap that you believe Affirmative Action creates.  There are so few Black Republicans, they are such a small part of the African American community, that you can't assume that all of them are ready to be affirmatively actioned into a position as major player in Republican party simply because they parrot your talking points and have dark skin.  You do it to yourselves, so don't blame us.
2013-03-29 10:41:42 PM  
1 votes:
I'm surprised there isn't some kind of 'law' or 'effect' named after the principal that as soon as some GOP flavor of the week is referred to as "terrifying" to liberals, they'll inevitably say something pants-on-head retarded within days.
2013-03-29 10:41:40 PM  
1 votes:
Sadly, as the Republicans continue the downward spiral to the wacky fringe, it gives a stage for idiots like this to spout their poison. Even sadder still is 1/2 of the voting population agrees.

I'm actually starting to wonder if this is some kind of undiagnosed mental illness caused by some environmental condition which causes people to think like this. After all, wasn't it lead plumbing that was a major contributing factor to the fall of the Romans?
2013-03-29 10:39:12 PM  
1 votes:
img90.imageshack.us
2013-03-29 10:37:47 PM  
1 votes:

Silly Jesus: RyogaM: If I wanted to lessen the political prospects of a certain race, I would promote among that race people I know to be unprepared for public office, those who have opinions that are in direct opposition to the wildly accepted beliefs and principles of the vast majority of the scientific community, have a tendency of overestimation of their competency outside their main field of expertise, and an inability to keep their mouth shut about things outside those areas of expertize.  It is even better if this particular specimen is highly accomplished, as it makes it appear as even the most highly skilled of that race are unsuited to public office.  That this appears to be what the Republicans are doing is just a coincidence.

[upload.wikimedia.org image 220x210]

You were saying?


When you promote a hundred people who happen to be certain race, an one turns out to be a dud, you are not going to foster an animus against that race. That is expected.

When you are the Republicans, and you promote 10 members who happen to be a certain race, and nine of them turn out to be duds, well, I'm just applying the same powers of observation Doc. Carson has in regards to Obama.  Clearly, one can assume the Republicans are trying to ruin Black Republicans by exposing them to scrutiny that are not prepared for.
2013-03-29 10:34:29 PM  
1 votes:

agb1953: Dr. Carson did not compare the 3 groups.  He listed the three groups as being those who fall in love but are not man/woman combinations.  In 2006 a Sudanese man married a goat, so there is precedent for his remark.




He was forced to marry the goat or be killed after he was caught having sex with it.

So I am not sure if that is the precedent you really want.

Link
2013-03-29 10:34:07 PM  
1 votes:
Oh, just another RepublicoFascist.
2013-03-29 10:33:51 PM  
1 votes:

Silly Jesus: RyogaM: If I wanted to lessen the political prospects of a certain race, I would promote among that race people I know to be unprepared for public office, those who have opinions that are in direct opposition to the wildly accepted beliefs and principles of the vast majority of the scientific community, have a tendency of overestimation of their competency outside their main field of expertise, and an inability to keep their mouth shut about things outside those areas of expertize.  It is even better if this particular specimen is highly accomplished, as it makes it appear as even the most highly skilled of that race are unsuited to public office.  That this appears to be what the Republicans are doing is just a coincidence.

[upload.wikimedia.org image 220x210]

You were saying?



a.abcnews.com

encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com
2013-03-29 10:31:39 PM  
1 votes:
Speaking of, search "turtle sex" on youtube. Doggystyle, hilarious courting procedures, adorable facial expressions and priceless squeals of ecstasy. It is too funny.
2013-03-29 10:31:26 PM  
1 votes:
OK, listen, we know that Alan Keyes and Herman Cain didn't work out, but this time we promise that the black guy we didn't fully vet and threw into the spotlight will totally be a viable candidate - nay the next Presidential candidate - for these United States of America.

Yours,
Reinhold Reince (Yessh that issss my real name) Priebus
2013-03-29 10:31:12 PM  
1 votes:
WTF??

I'm getting some hellacious cyan afterimages from that red thing.
2013-03-29 10:30:31 PM  
1 votes:

EmmaLou: Just once, once I would like to go through a day and not think "WTF is wrong with people?"


Try going camping. A nice backpacking or canoe trip in a remote wilderness is a good way to get away from the derp. And everything else, really.
2013-03-29 10:27:58 PM  
1 votes:
Well, Bye, Mr. Non-apology apology bigoted guy
2013-03-29 10:26:27 PM  
1 votes:
If I wanted to lessen the political prospects of a certain race, I would promote among that race people I know to be unprepared for public office, those who have opinions that are in direct opposition to the wildly accepted beliefs and principles of the vast majority of the scientific community, have a tendency of overestimation of their competency outside their main field of expertise, and an inability to keep their mouth shut about things outside those areas of expertize.  It is even better if this particular specimen is highly accomplished, as it makes it appear as even the most highly skilled of that race are unsuited to public office.  That this appears to be what the Republicans are doing is just a coincidence.
2013-03-29 10:15:13 PM  
1 votes:
media-cache-lt0.pinterest.com
sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net
2013-03-29 10:10:49 PM  
1 votes:
I find it ironic that one of the reasons this guy is a "rising star" of conservativism is that Hannity has been promoting him relentlessly and repeatedly inviting him on his program, and it's stuff that Carson said on Hannity that got him into hot water.
2013-03-29 10:00:25 PM  
1 votes:

dickfreckle: Speaker2Animals: If you ask me for an apple and I give you an orange you would say, that's not an orange. And I say, that's a banana. And that's not an apple either. Or a peach, that's not an apple, either. It doesn't mean that I'm equating the banana and the orange and the peach. In the same way I'm not equating those things."

And this is what passes for intelligence in the GOP.

Thing is, the dude is a pediatric neurosurgeon - not a job they just hand out to retards. My father was also a highly educated, menacingly intelligent man who for some reason let the derp break free when the conversation steered to politics or social norms. I'm sure plenty of you work with some highly pedigreed guy in the office down the hall who thinks Todd Akin makes sense and just got a raw deal from the liberal media. Then he goes back to designing a farking skyscraper or jet engine.

I've never understood how otherwise smart people can fall for politics that thrive on the lowest common denominator. I have a worthless BA from an equally worthless state drinking university that I don't recall attending, but even I know bullsh*t when I see it. Others can be educated in strict logic for 8 post-secondary years plus a residency and still can't count past potato. And I don't mean to say this because I disagree; I'm talking about actual stupidity, like the aforementioned Akin.

Meh, such is life.


You don't have to be dumb to be a bigot.

/but it helps
2013-03-29 09:56:27 PM  
1 votes:

Mrtraveler01: willfullyobscure: this man is also a Creationist. Your move, PZ MHuuurrryers

How can a brain surgeon be this stupid?


Affirmative action.
/ window seat please.
2013-03-29 09:55:01 PM  
1 votes:

Speaker2Animals: If you ask me for an apple and I give you an orange you would say, that's not an orange. And I say, that's a banana. And that's not an apple either. Or a peach, that's not an apple, either. It doesn't mean that I'm equating the banana and the orange and the peach. In the same way I'm not equating those things."

And this is what passes for intelligence in the GOP.


Thing is, the dude is a pediatric neurosurgeon - not a job they just hand out to retards. My father was also a highly educated, menacingly intelligent man who for some reason let the derp break free when the conversation steered to politics or social norms. I'm sure plenty of you work with some highly pedigreed guy in the office down the hall who thinks Todd Akin makes sense and just got a raw deal from the liberal media. Then he goes back to designing a farking skyscraper or jet engine.

I've never understood how otherwise smart people can fall for politics that thrive on the lowest common denominator. I have a worthless BA from an equally worthless state drinking university that I don't recall attending, but even I know bullsh*t when I see it. Others can be educated in strict logic for 8 post-secondary years plus a residency and still can't count past potato. And I don't mean to say this because I disagree; I'm talking about actual stupidity, like the aforementioned Akin.

Meh, such is life.
2013-03-29 09:51:33 PM  
1 votes:

KrispyKritter: Dr clearly stated his opinion and was not making comparisons as butt hurt folks interpret in their deluded minds. Too farking bad his opinion is not your own. Everybody gets to speak their mind in america until the government makes that illegal.


I never know when you're being serious or not. By that statement I should have you Farkied in a much deeper shade of red.
2013-03-29 09:49:00 PM  
1 votes:
images.zap2it.com
Should read Sorry pamphlette
2013-03-29 09:44:20 PM  
1 votes:

Nina_Hartley's_Ass: The GOP's Great Black Hope Dope goes down!


And he was doing so well there for a while......

Then he opened his mouth.
2013-03-29 09:42:45 PM  
1 votes:
JohnTuttle:

(Yes, I haven't sat down and thought all of this through, but this seems to be a good point of argument for me from here on out.)

Marriage wasn't instituted by "God" so it isn't a valid argument.  Societies that have never heard of Judeochristianity still farking get married.
2013-03-29 09:40:10 PM  
1 votes:

Silly Jesus: Person A:  I like ice cream, Legos and boobies.

Lib:  OMG ice cream is nothing like Legos, HOW CAN YOU BE EQUATING THE TWO!?!?!?!


Yet another example of conservatives (and therefore trolls posing as conservatives) lacking the ability to understand or make analogies.
2013-03-29 09:37:43 PM  
1 votes:
I figured it was only a matter of time before he opened his mouth and reinforced the stereotype of a talented doctor who is a moron when he ventures into areas other than his own area of expertise.
2013-03-29 09:35:11 PM  
1 votes:
Just gotta keep him alive long enough to tell me the name on the grave.

/oh wait, that's Bill Carson. Never mind
2013-03-29 09:34:23 PM  
1 votes:

KrispyKritter: Please point and laugh at me.  I need SOMEONE to pay attention to me.


Ok.

/Points.
//Laughs
///Ha-ha!
////Four slashies deep, Yo!
2013-03-29 09:33:57 PM  
1 votes:

Great Janitor: Who here hasn't seen a sexy turtle and said "I wanna hit that?"  My wife won't let me keep a turtle in the house anymore after what I did to that last turtle.

/and it was consensual.


farm6.staticflickr.com
2013-03-29 09:33:13 PM  
1 votes:

willfullyobscure: this man is also a Creationist. Your move, PZ MHuuurrryers


How can a brain surgeon be this stupid?
2013-03-29 09:30:42 PM  
1 votes:
The moment Worldnetdaily endorsed this guy I knew it was only a matter of time before he shoved his foot down his throat.
2013-03-29 09:26:48 PM  
1 votes:
Wait, isn't NAMBLA just Marlon Brando Look Alikes? What does sex have to do with it?
2013-03-29 09:21:54 PM  
1 votes:
Consenting adult, child, goat... it's all the same, right?
2013-03-29 09:19:37 PM  
1 votes:
www.wepsite.de
2013-03-29 09:16:21 PM  
1 votes:
That's funny, because this guy looks like the end product of a NAMBLA adherent and a turtle having sex.
2013-03-29 08:13:33 PM  
1 votes:

Relatively Obscure: "What I was basically saying and if anyone was offended, I apologize to you. What I was basically saying is there is no group. I wasn't equating those things, I don't think they're equal. If you ask me for an apple and I give you an orange you would say, that's not an orange. And I say, that's a banana. And that's not an apple either. Or a peach, that's not an apple, either. It doesn't mean that I'm equating the banana and the orange and the peach. In the same way I'm not equating those things."


Sometimes a banana is just a banana.
2013-03-29 08:06:31 PM  
1 votes:

GAT_00: I'm surprised conservatives have a problem with what he said.


The problem isn't with the content of what he said, it was that he said it when the GOP is trying to rebrand itself.
2013-03-29 06:49:38 PM  
1 votes:

Relatively Obscure: Carson's comparison of gay relationships to pedophilia (NAMBLA stands for the North American Man/Boy Love Association) and bestiality has caused the pediatric neurosurgeon to fall from his perch as a Republican rising a star in recent days.

As many people as have occupied that position recently, it's like they coated that perch with axle grease.


To be fair, the type of person who would fit the Republican Rising Star category has a pretty high correlation with the type of person who would say something crazy and offensive.
 
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