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(MSNBC)   Dr. Ben Carson will no longer be speaking at Johns Hopkins after comparing gays to NAMBLA and people who want to have sex with turtles   (tv.msnbc.com) divider line 613
    More: Dumbass, NAMBLA, Dr. Ben Carson, Johns Hopkins, National Prayer Breakfasts, andrea mitchell, gay marriage ban, Presidential Medal of Freedom, gays  
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13232 clicks; posted to Main » on 29 Mar 2013 at 9:13 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-03-29 11:15:36 PM  
Deep thoughts concerning yogurt

i.imgur.com
 
2013-03-29 11:16:04 PM  

Silly Jesus: RyogaM: Silly Jesus: Mrtraveler01: Silly Jesus: Mrtraveler01: Silly Jesus: I liked his 10% flat tax idea.

Ah, so he can't do math either huh?

Unless this is an additional tax, which in that case is heresy in the GOP.

Flat taxes aren't math?  Potato?

That's the kind of thinking one has to have to think that a 10% flat tax is sustainable.

These 41 countries with a flat tax might be interested in your expertise.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flat_tax#Countries_that_have_flat_tax_s ys tems

Holy shiat dude, did you even read that list?  Name five countries on that list with a 10% flat tax rate that you'd want to live in rather than the U.S.A.

What about these states?  Could you even live in any of them?  Or Alberta?!?  OMG!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flat_tax#At_the_state_or_provincial_lev el


I live in Ohio.  The highest state income tax bracket in my state is 5.9% for couples over $200000.  My bracket right now is less than every flat tax you listed except Col.  And no, I would not want to live in Col.  So, thanks, I would not like to raise my tax rate to give a break to those making over $200,000.

Way to ignore my challenge to name 5 countries, btw.  You're a bold debater, you are.
 
2013-03-29 11:17:19 PM  
Silly Jesus:

These 41 countries with a flat tax might be interested in your expertise.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flat_tax#Countries_that_have_flat_tax_s ys tems


God I love that list. Offshore bankers like the Seychelles and Anguilla, and economic powerhouses like Serbia and Nagorno-Karabakh.

FTL:
Greenland 37 to 46% (depending on the municipality)

Greenland's got municipalities? How would you like to work for Greenland's equivalent of the IRS?

Saudi Arabia 2.5% zakat (citizens of GCC countries) 20% income tax (foreigners)

Suuuure.  Betcha that doesn't include jizyah.
 
2013-03-29 11:18:24 PM  

Infernalist: ghare: EmmaLou: cptjeff: EmmaLou: Just once, once I would like to go through a day and not think "WTF is wrong with people?"

Try going camping. A nice backpacking or canoe trip in a remote wilderness is a good way to get away from the derp. And everything else, really.

I've been seriously considering that.  I think being disconnected for a few days with definitely help.

Get a good tent. I mean really.

Rustics.

Seriously, if you need to get away, go get a hotel room for a week on the beach.   The woods are full of dirt, trees and animals.


And campfires, and waking up right next to a beautiful stream, and no TV to distract, lots of birdsong, air that smells nice, no cars, no stupid electronic noises and beeping...

You can bring a fly rod along and add fresh fish to the deal if you like, cooked right on that campfire even.

Seriously, if you have access to a car, internet, TV, and your smartphone, you aren't really getting away.
 
2013-03-29 11:18:57 PM  

RyogaM: Silly Jesus: RyogaM: Silly Jesus: Mrtraveler01: Silly Jesus: Mrtraveler01: Silly Jesus: I liked his 10% flat tax idea.

Ah, so he can't do math either huh?

Unless this is an additional tax, which in that case is heresy in the GOP.

Flat taxes aren't math?  Potato?

That's the kind of thinking one has to have to think that a 10% flat tax is sustainable.

These 41 countries with a flat tax might be interested in your expertise.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flat_tax#Countries_that_have_flat_tax_s ys tems

Holy shiat dude, did you even read that list?  Name five countries on that list with a 10% flat tax rate that you'd want to live in rather than the U.S.A.

What about these states?  Could you even live in any of them?  Or Alberta?!?  OMG!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flat_tax#At_the_state_or_provincial_lev el

I live in Ohio.  The highest state income tax bracket in my state is 5.9% for couples over $200000.  My bracket right now is less than every flat tax you listed except Col.  And no, I would not want to live in Col.  So, thanks, I would not like to raise my tax rate to give a break to those making over $200,000.

Way to ignore my challenge to name 5 countries, btw.  You're a bold debater, you are.


I guess the point I was trying to make that he keeps ignoring that a flat tax could work in theory, but 10% is so low that it's borderline retarded.
 
2013-03-29 11:19:39 PM  

MBooda: Silly Jesus:

These 41 countries with a flat tax might be interested in your expertise.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flat_tax#Countries_that_have_flat_tax_s ys tems

God I love that list. Offshore bankers like the Seychelles and Anguilla, and economic powerhouses like Serbia and Nagorno-Karabakh.

FTL:
Greenland 37 to 46% (depending on the municipality)

Greenland's got municipalities? How would you like to work for Greenland's equivalent of the IRS?

Saudi Arabia 2.5% zakat (citizens of GCC countries) 20% income tax (foreigners)

Suuuure.  Betcha that doesn't include jizyah.


Yeah but there are states too!

States work the same way countries do right?
 
2013-03-29 11:21:00 PM  

Mrtraveler01: A good article summing up the pros and cons of the Flat Tax.

http://smallbusiness.chron.com/pros-cons-flat-tax-4210.html


So, essentially, the cons are that IRS workers would lose their job and that the government wouldn't have enough money taken from the rich to give to the poor, poor, pitiful poor.  Those don't really seem like cons to me.  And there were quite a few pros.
 
2013-03-29 11:21:52 PM  

bill4935: [images.cryhavok.org image 515x634]


Cowabunga, dude!
 
2013-03-29 11:22:12 PM  

cptjeff: Infernalist: ghare: EmmaLou: cptjeff: EmmaLou: Just once, once I would like to go through a day and not think "WTF is wrong with people?"

Try going camping. A nice backpacking or canoe trip in a remote wilderness is a good way to get away from the derp. And everything else, really.

I've been seriously considering that.  I think being disconnected for a few days with definitely help.

Get a good tent. I mean really.

Rustics.

Seriously, if you need to get away, go get a hotel room for a week on the beach.   The woods are full of dirt, trees and animals.

And campfires, and waking up right next to a beautiful stream, and no TV to distract, lots of birdsong, air that smells nice, no cars, no stupid electronic noises and beeping...

You can bring a fly rod along and add fresh fish to the deal if you like, cooked right on that campfire even.

Seriously, if you have access to a car, internet, TV, and your smartphone, you aren't really getting away.


I like being in the woods.  My wife thinks its full of bugs and dirt and trees.  She likes nice hotels, so I stay in them a lot.  And I will admit that as nice as a quiet forest glade is, there is something to be said about room service.

/ Hotel del Coronado, here I come...
 
2013-03-29 11:22:32 PM  

Mrtraveler01: I guess the point I was trying to make that he keeps ignoring that a flat tax could work in theory, but 10% is so low that it's borderline retarded


I agree.  There is no f'n way a 10% flat tax would work.  25% or 30%, maybe.  If that's what the Republicans want, I say, Proceed.
 
2013-03-29 11:23:15 PM  

RyogaM: Silly Jesus: RyogaM: Silly Jesus: Mrtraveler01: Silly Jesus: Mrtraveler01: Silly Jesus: I liked his 10% flat tax idea.

Ah, so he can't do math either huh?

Unless this is an additional tax, which in that case is heresy in the GOP.

Flat taxes aren't math?  Potato?

That's the kind of thinking one has to have to think that a 10% flat tax is sustainable.

These 41 countries with a flat tax might be interested in your expertise.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flat_tax#Countries_that_have_flat_tax_s ys tems

Holy shiat dude, did you even read that list?  Name five countries on that list with a 10% flat tax rate that you'd want to live in rather than the U.S.A.

What about these states?  Could you even live in any of them?  Or Alberta?!?  OMG!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flat_tax#At_the_state_or_provincial_lev el

I live in Ohio.  The highest state income tax bracket in my state is 5.9% for couples over $200000.  My bracket right now is less than every flat tax you listed except Col.  And no, I would not want to live in Col.  So, thanks, I would not like to raise my tax rate to give a break to those making over $200,000.

Way to ignore my challenge to name 5 countries, btw.  You're a bold debater, you are.


A flat tax would give a tax break to those over 200,000?  Huh?

Also, I didn't accept your nifty challenge because it was asinine.  The standard for the tax being mathematically plausible in the U.S. isn't whether or not I want to live in Jamaica.  There are a couple of other variables that might make the U.S. different from Eastern Europe that aren't flat tax related.
 
2013-03-29 11:23:24 PM  

Great Janitor: Who here hasn't seen a sexy turtle and said "I wanna hit that?"  My wife won't let me keep a turtle in the house anymore after what I did to that last turtle.

/and it was consensual.


I may have found your video

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GHI8LnoixFE
 
2013-03-29 11:24:30 PM  
Can the the last person who supports the GOP just shut the lights off on their way out.  Thanks.
 
2013-03-29 11:25:02 PM  

Mrtraveler01: RyogaM: Silly Jesus: RyogaM: Silly Jesus: Mrtraveler01: Silly Jesus: Mrtraveler01: Silly Jesus: I liked his 10% flat tax idea.

Ah, so he can't do math either huh?

Unless this is an additional tax, which in that case is heresy in the GOP.

Flat taxes aren't math?  Potato?

That's the kind of thinking one has to have to think that a 10% flat tax is sustainable.

These 41 countries with a flat tax might be interested in your expertise.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flat_tax#Countries_that_have_flat_tax_s ys tems

Holy shiat dude, did you even read that list?  Name five countries on that list with a 10% flat tax rate that you'd want to live in rather than the U.S.A.

What about these states?  Could you even live in any of them?  Or Alberta?!?  OMG!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flat_tax#At_the_state_or_provincial_lev el

I live in Ohio.  The highest state income tax bracket in my state is 5.9% for couples over $200000.  My bracket right now is less than every flat tax you listed except Col.  And no, I would not want to live in Col.  So, thanks, I would not like to raise my tax rate to give a break to those making over $200,000.

Way to ignore my challenge to name 5 countries, btw.  You're a bold debater, you are.

I guess the point I was trying to make that he keeps ignoring that a flat tax could work in theory, but 10% is so low that it's borderline retarded.


Oh, I didn't get that that was your point.  I'm not locked in to the 10%...I just liked the flat tax idea.  I was just throwing a number out there.
 
2013-03-29 11:25:35 PM  

cptjeff: Infernalist: ghare: EmmaLou: cptjeff: EmmaLou: Just once, once I would like to go through a day and not think "WTF is wrong with people?"

Try going camping. A nice backpacking or canoe trip in a remote wilderness is a good way to get away from the derp. And everything else, really.

I've been seriously considering that.  I think being disconnected for a few days with definitely help.

Get a good tent. I mean really.

Rustics.

Seriously, if you need to get away, go get a hotel room for a week on the beach.   The woods are full of dirt, trees and animals.

And campfires, and waking up right next to a beautiful stream, and no TV to distract, lots of birdsong, air that smells nice, no cars, no stupid electronic noises and beeping...

You can bring a fly rod along and add fresh fish to the deal if you like, cooked right on that campfire even.

Seriously, if you have access to a car, internet, TV, and your smartphone, you aren't really getting away.


So much this.

I've been seriously considering a beach retreat to a nice bed and breakfast style retreat free for any and all electronic devices and a good book. I've got plans for a cheap but good choice in Cape May, NJ at the end of May this year with my wife and I think it's probably just what the doctor ordered for my blood pressure.
 
2013-03-29 11:26:16 PM  

Mrtraveler01: MBooda: Silly Jesus:

These 41 countries with a flat tax might be interested in your expertise.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flat_tax#Countries_that_have_flat_tax_s ys tems

God I love that list. Offshore bankers like the Seychelles and Anguilla, and economic powerhouses like Serbia and Nagorno-Karabakh.

FTL:
Greenland 37 to 46% (depending on the municipality)

Greenland's got municipalities? How would you like to work for Greenland's equivalent of the IRS?

Saudi Arabia 2.5% zakat (citizens of GCC countries) 20% income tax (foreigners)

Suuuure.  Betcha that doesn't include jizyah.

Yeah but there are states too!

States work the same way countries do right?


No, totally different.  They aren't at all like small countries....and counties aren't at all like small states....
 
2013-03-29 11:28:24 PM  

Kittypie070: Deep thoughts concerning yogurt

[i.imgur.com image 600x450]


But is it fruit yogurt? I like fruit yogurt.
 
2013-03-29 11:28:42 PM  

Silly Jesus: A flat tax would give a tax break to those over 200,000? Huh?

Also, I didn't accept your nifty challenge because it was asinine. The standard for the tax being mathematically plausible in the U.S. isn't whether or not I want to live in Jamaica. There are a couple of other variables that might make the U.S. different from Eastern Europe that aren't flat tax related.


You aren't really good at this at all.  But, on the plus side, I'm going to bed soon, so you will get the last word.

Yes, as has been pointed out, a 10% flat tax, as espoused by the latest Black friend of the Republicans, would not, under any circumstances work in the U.S., and anyone who can't figure that out, well, they ain't ready to be made the latest face of Republican Black outreach, that's fer sure.
 
2013-03-29 11:28:53 PM  
ecx.images-amazon.com
 
2013-03-29 11:29:17 PM  
zombiesruineverything.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-03-29 11:31:25 PM  
So about the whole flat tax thing. Point is, there are no real world examples for how this would go down for a major economy like the United States who set a very global economic market presence. Therefore it's highly unlikely that the United States will be willing to jeopardize that position with such a radical change to a major component that affects market economics like taxation. The risk is too high.
 
2013-03-29 11:31:42 PM  

Gyrfalcon: Kittypie070: Deep thoughts concerning yogurt

[i.imgur.com image 600x450]


But is it fruit yogurt? I like fruit yogurt.


I have the feeling it's some Scandinavian-area clabbered dairy product.
 
2013-03-29 11:32:37 PM  

ko_kyi: Great Janitor: Who here hasn't seen a sexy turtle and said "I wanna hit that?"  My wife won't let me keep a turtle in the house anymore after what I did to that last turtle.

/and it was consensual.

I may have found your video

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GHI8LnoixFE


Hot turtle on boot action.

/fappin'
 
2013-03-29 11:32:45 PM  

cptjeff: Infernalist: ghare: EmmaLou: cptjeff: EmmaLou: Just once, once I would like to go through a day and not think "WTF is wrong with people?"

Try going camping. A nice backpacking or canoe trip in a remote wilderness is a good way to get away from the derp. And everything else, really.

I've been seriously considering that.  I think being disconnected for a few days with definitely help.

Get a good tent. I mean really.

Rustics.

Seriously, if you need to get away, go get a hotel room for a week on the beach.   The woods are full of dirt, trees and animals.

And campfires, and waking up right next to a beautiful stream, and no TV to distract, lots of birdsong, air that smells nice, no cars, no stupid electronic noises and beeping...

You can bring a fly rod along and add fresh fish to the deal if you like, cooked right on that campfire even.

Seriously, if you have access to a car, internet, TV, and your smartphone, you aren't really getting away.


To each their own.  I know how to turn my stuff off and open a window if I want clean air.  And if I want fish, I'm sure the hotel staff can point me at a nice restaurant.
 
2013-03-29 11:32:59 PM  

gilgigamesh: The_Sponge: I like turtles.

Well pretty soon you'll be able to marry one. Congrats. I am sure you'll be very happy together.


I just got flashbacks to Pokey the turtle in Ernest Goes to Camp.
 
2013-03-29 11:33:54 PM  

Mrtraveler01: Wait, he was a rising star for the GOP? I haven't even heard of him until earlier this week.


If you're black and agree with the GOP, you are a rising star.

i5.photobucket.com
 
2013-03-29 11:34:19 PM  

Type_Hard: "What I was basically saying and if anyone was offended, I apologize to you. What I was basically saying is there is no group. I wasn't equating those things, I don't think they're equal. If you ask me for an apple and I give you an orange you would say, that's not an orange. And I say, that's a banana. And that's not an apple either. Or a peach, that's not an apple, either. It doesn't mean that I'm equating the banana and the orange and the peach. In the same way I'm not equating those things."

TLDR translation: "Potato..."


No... Recycled corn.
 
2013-03-29 11:34:46 PM  

Silly Jesus: Oh, I didn't get that that was your point. I'm not locked in to the 10%...I just liked the flat tax idea. I was just throwing a number out there.


Everyone was arguing that The Math Did Not Add Up.  That's an argument against a 10% flat tax, not the tax itself.

Being for a Flat Tax without mentioning a rate that is actually mathematically realistic is like being for Free hookers and Blow for everyone, without saying how you pay for it.  It's asinine.  Like Doc. Carson.
 
2013-03-29 11:35:41 PM  

Kittypie070: Deep thoughts concerning yogurt


D'aww.

Are kittens crunchy when you eat them despite their soft, furry shell?

These are the questions the bastard part of my brain demand answers to every day.
 
2013-03-29 11:39:02 PM  

Void_Beavis: Kittypie070: Deep thoughts concerning yogurt

D'aww.

Are kittens crunchy when you eat them despite their soft, furry shell?

These are the questions the bastard part of my brain demand answers to every day.


Uh, they're tender all the way through, it's only the little bones that are crunchy.

/these are the kinda questions that kept me outta Harvard -- George Carlin
 
2013-03-29 11:39:03 PM  

Loucifer: Is it a five-assed turtle?


Oh, that would be a great, if unanticipated, use for a pentadong.
 
2013-03-29 11:40:37 PM  

RyogaM: Silly Jesus: Oh, I didn't get that that was your point. I'm not locked in to the 10%...I just liked the flat tax idea. I was just throwing a number out there.

Everyone was arguing that The Math Did Not Add Up.  That's an argument against a 10% flat tax, not the tax itself.

Being for a Flat Tax without mentioning a rate that is actually mathematically realistic is like being for Free hookers and Blow for everyone, without saying how you pay for it.  It's asinine.  Like Doc. Carson.


Usually libs argue against the flat tax on the basis of "the poors will have to pay as much (percentage wise) as the wealthy, and that's not faaaaaaiiiiiiiirrrrrr."  I was caught off guard.
 
2013-03-29 11:42:31 PM  

Kittypie070: Void_Beavis: Kittypie070: Deep thoughts concerning yogurt

D'aww.

Are kittens crunchy when you eat them despite their soft, furry shell?

These are the questions the bastard part of my brain demand answers to every day.

Uh, they're tender all the way through, it's only the little bones that are crunchy.

/these are the kinda questions that kept me outta Harvard -- George Carlin


Which leads to my next question.

And how do you know this?

/hugs kittypie just because her crazy kitty ass is one of my favorited posters here and I love it so blargh.
 
2013-03-29 11:43:49 PM  

Zulu_as_Kono: Loucifer: Is it a five-assed turtle?

Oh, that would be a great, if unanticipated, use for a pentadong.


I like the cut of your jib, sir.
 
2013-03-29 11:47:11 PM  

agb1953: Dr. Carson did not compare the 3 groups.  He listed the three groups as being those who fall in love but are not man/woman combinations.  In 2006 a Sudanese man married a goat, so there is precedent for his remark.


You be sure to let us know when this "precedent" happens somewhere other than a 3rd world backwater.
 
2013-03-29 11:47:31 PM  
"What I was basically saying and if anyone was offended, I apologize to you. What I was basically saying is there is no group. I wasn't equating those things, I don't think they're equal. If you ask me for an apple and I give you an orange you would say, that's not an orange. And I say, that's a banana. And that's not an apple either. Or a peach, that's not an apple, either. It doesn't mean that I'm equating the banana and the orange and the peach. In the same way I'm not equating those things."

The important thing is you've convinced yourself this word-salad covers your obvious brain fart.
 
2013-03-29 11:50:09 PM  
Most other like ________ folks probably agree with him but don't want to cut off the gravy train.
 
2013-03-29 11:51:42 PM  
Learning how to do something takes no critical thinking skills whatsoever.  Challenging existing thought and coming up with new things takes intelligence, rote memorization takes none.  Morons can be taught complicated tasks and autistic people can be "savants", but it doesn't make them smart.
 
2013-03-29 11:56:29 PM  

Relatively Obscure: NAMBLA stands for the North American Man/Boy Love Association


National Association for Marlon Brando Look Alikes.
duh
 
2013-03-29 11:56:56 PM  

Void_Beavis: Kittypie070: Deep thoughts concerning yogurt

D'aww.

Are kittens crunchy when you eat them despite their soft, furry shell?

These are the questions the bastard part of my brain demand answers to every day.


Ew, you don't eat the shell. Just the soft purry innards.

But not my kitteh. I'll swoop on anyone who goes after my kitteh.
 
2013-03-29 11:59:56 PM  

BobCumbers: Most other like ________ folks probably agree with him but don't want to cut off the gravy train.


Republican?
 
2013-03-30 12:00:59 AM  

MBooda: Betcha that doesn't include jizyah.


Jizyah? I hardly even know yah!
 
2013-03-30 12:01:08 AM  

Ennuipoet: gilgigamesh: The_Sponge: I like turtles.

Well pretty soon you'll be able to marry one. Congrats. I am sure you'll be very happy together.

[4.bp.blogspot.com image 273x412]
Combine NAMBLA and Turtle Farking and see what kind of sick deviance you get!


That's sick! How dare you post a picture of incest!
/depending on which series you go by
//dear lord, why do I know that about TMNT?
 
2013-03-30 12:01:16 AM  
Another GOPer will foot in mouth disease?
 
2013-03-30 12:02:47 AM  
 
2013-03-30 12:05:09 AM  
One Cuil = One level of abstraction away from the reality of a situation.
Example: You ask me for a Hamburger.
1 Cuil: if you asked me for a hamburger, and I gave you a raccoon.
2 Cuils: If you asked me for a hamburger, but it turns out I don't really exist. Where I was originally standing, a picture of a hamburger rests on the ground.
3 Cuils: You awake as a hamburger. You start screaming only to have special sauce fly from your lips. The world is in sepia.
4 Cuils: Why are we speaking German? A mime cries softly as he cradles a young cow. Your grandfather stares at you as the cow falls apart into patties. You look down only to see me with pickles for eyes, I am singing the song that gives birth to the universe.
5 Cuils: You ask for a hamburger, I give you a hamburger. You raise it to your lips and take a bite. Your eye twitches involuntarily. Across the street a father of three falls down the stairs. You swallow and look down at the hamburger in your hands. I give you a hamburger. You swallow and look down at the hamburger in your hands. You cannot swallow. There are children at the top of the stairs. A pickle shifts uneasily under the bun. I give you a hamburger. You look at my face, and I am pleading with you. The children are crying now. You raise the hamburger to your lips, tears stream down your face as you take a bite. I give you a hamburger. You are on your knees. You plead with me to go across the street. I hear only children's laughter. I give you a hamburger. You are screaming as you fall down the stairs. I am your child. You cannot see anything. You take a bite of the hamburger. The concrete rushes up to meet you. You awake with a start in your own bed. Your eye twitches involuntarily. I give you a hamburger. As you kill me, I do not make a sound. I give you a hamburger.
6 Cuils: You ask me for a hamburger. My attempt to reciprocate is cut brutally short as my body experiences a sudden lack of electrons. Across a variety of hidden dimensions you are dismayed. John Lennon hands me an apple, but it slips through my fingers. I am reborn as an ocelot. You disapprove. A crack echoes through the universe in defiance of conventional physics as cosmological background noise shifts from randomness to a perfect A Flat. Children everywhere stop what they are doing and hum along in perfect pitch with the background radiation. Birds fall from the sky as the sun engulfs the earth. You hesitate momentarily before allowing yourself to assume the locus of all knowledge. Entropy crumbles as you peruse the information contained within the universe. A small library in Phoenix ceases to exist. You stumble under the weight of everythingness, Your mouth opens up to cry out, and collapses around your body before blinking you out of the spatial plane. You exist only within the fourth dimension. The fountainhead of all knowledge rolls along the ground and collides with a small dog. My head tastes sideways as spacetime is reestablished, you blink back into the corporeal world disoriented, only for me to hand you a hamburger as my body collapses under the strain of reconstitution. The universe has reasserted itself. A particular small dog is fed steak for the rest of its natural life. You die in a freak accident moments later, and you soul works at the returns desk for the Phoenix library. You disapprove. Your disapproval sends ripples through the inter-dimensional void between life and death. A small child begins to cry as he walks toward the stairway where his father stands.
7 Cuils: I give you a hamburger. The universe is engulfed within itself. A bus advertising hotdogs drives by a papillon. It disapproves. An unnatural force reverses Earth's gravity. You ask for a hamburger. I reciprocate with a mildly convulsing potato. You disapprove. Your disapproval releases a cosmic shift in the void between birth and life. You ask for a hamburger. A certain small dog feasts on hamburger patties for the rest of its unnatural, eternal endurance. Your constant disapproval sends silence through everything. A contrived beast becomes omnipotent. You ask for a hamburger. I give you a hamburger your body becomes an unsettled blob of nothingness, then divides by three. The papillon barks. The universe realigns itself. You, the papillon, and the hamburger disapprove. This condemnation stops the realignment. Hades freezes over. A pig is launched is launched into the unoccupied existence between space and time with a specific hamburger. You ask for a hamburger. I give you a hamburger. It screams as you lift it to your face. You laugh maniacally as I plead with you. You devour the hamburger as it pleads for mercy. I disapprove and condemn you to an eternity in a certain void where a certain pig and its specific hamburger are located. The Universal Space-time Continuum Committee disapproves of my irrational decision. You are locked away and are fed hamburgers for the rest of your natural existence. A pickle refuses to break down during the process of digestion. You die in a freak accident. A certain pickle lives the rest of its life in a comatose state. Your soul disapproves. Down the street a child cries as a hamburger gets stuck in, and climbs back up, her esophagus. You ask again for a hamburger. I refuse to reciprocate. You demand a lawyer. I remind you harshly that this is the new world order. Lawyers no longer exist. Only papillons. Your name is written on a list of sins. Blasphemy. You ask for a hamburger. The comatose pickle vanquishes your soul from this universe. Realignment occurs. You beg for a hamburger. A certain papillon's name is written on an obelisk in Egypt. Mumble. Peasants worship the obelisk. Your soulless corpse partakes in the festivity. Hamburgers are banned universally. The sun implodes. All planets cease to have ever existed. Mercury. Venus. Earth. Mars. Jupiter. Saturn. Uranus. Neptune. Pluto is the only mass in existence. Conveniently, you are on vacation here. Your need for hamburgers re-establishes space-time. Earth is recreated under your intergalactic rule. Hamburgers are your army. You wake up. Clowns. Clowns everywhere. Your dream rushes to meet you. You are kidnapped. You ask for a hamburger. They hand you a hotdog.
 
2013-03-30 12:07:15 AM  

fusillade762: You be sure to let us know when this "precedent" happens somewhere other than a 3rd world backwater.


I just had to post this, from the Salt Lake Trib:

http://www.sltrib.com/sltrib/politics/56073795-90/marriage-duck-lake -s alt.html.csp
 
2013-03-30 12:07:40 AM  
"When you're walking home tonight and some great homicidal maniac comes after you with a bunch of loganberries, don't come crying to me! Now, the passion fruit. When your assailant lunges at you with a passion fruit, thus..."
 
2013-03-30 12:09:26 AM  
victorycabal: Why is it that no one in politics can just say something like "I really farked up, I was wrong, I'm really sorry"?
=================================================

Because they weren't sorry and they really meant what they said.
 
2013-03-30 12:10:13 AM  

error 303: One Cuil = One level of abstraction away from the reality of a situation.
Example: You ask me for a Hamburger.
1 Cuil: if you asked me for a hamburger, and I gave you a raccoon.
2 Cuils: If you asked me for a hamburger, but it turns out I don't really exist. Where I was originally standing, a picture of a hamburger rests on the ground.
3 Cuils: You awake as a hamburger. You start screaming only to have special sauce fly from your lips. The world is in sepia.
4 Cuils: Why are we speaking German? A mime cries softly as he cradles a young cow. Your grandfather stares at you as the cow falls apart into patties. You look down only to see me with pickles for eyes, I am singing the song that gives birth to the universe.
5 Cuils: You ask for a hamburger, I give you a hamburger. You raise it to your lips and take a bite. Your eye twitches involuntarily. Across the street a father of three falls down the stairs. You swallow and look down at the hamburger in your hands. I give you a hamburger. You swallow and look down at the hamburger in your hands. You cannot swallow. There are children at the top of the stairs. A pickle shifts uneasily under the bun. I give you a hamburger. You look at my face, and I am pleading with you. The children are crying now. You raise the hamburger to your lips, tears stream down your face as you take a bite. I give you a hamburger. You are on your knees. You plead with me to go across the street. I hear only children's laughter. I give you a hamburger. You are screaming as you fall down the stairs. I am your child. You cannot see anything. You take a bite of the hamburger. The concrete rushes up to meet you. You awake with a start in your own bed. Your eye twitches involuntarily. I give you a hamburger. As you kill me, I do not make a sound. I give you a hamburger.
6 Cuils: You ask me for a hamburger. My attempt to reciprocate is cut brutally short as my body experiences a sudden lack of electrons. Across a variety of hidden dimensions you are dismayed. John Lennon hands me an apple, but it slips through my fingers. I am reborn as an ocelot. You disapprove. A crack echoes through the universe in defiance of conventional physics as cosmological background noise shifts from randomness to a perfect A Flat. Children everywhere stop what they are doing and hum along in perfect pitch with the background radiation. Birds fall from the sky as the sun engulfs the earth. You hesitate momentarily before allowing yourself to assume the locus of all knowledge. Entropy crumbles as you peruse the information contained within the universe. A small library in Phoenix ceases to exist. You stumble under the weight of everythingness, Your mouth opens up to cry out, and collapses around your body before blinking you out of the spatial plane. You exist only within the fourth dimension. The fountainhead of all knowledge rolls along the ground and collides with a small dog. My head tastes sideways as spacetime is reestablished, you blink back into the corporeal world disoriented, only for me to hand you a hamburger as my body collapses under the strain of reconstitution. The universe has reasserted itself. A particular small dog is fed steak for the rest of its natural life. You die in a freak accident moments later, and you soul works at the returns desk for the Phoenix library. You disapprove. Your disapproval sends ripples through the inter-dimensional void between life and death. A small child begins to cry as he walks toward the stairway where his father stands.
7 Cuils: I give you a hamburger. The universe is engulfed within itself. A bus advertising hotdogs drives by a papillon. It disapproves. An unnatural force reverses Earth's gravity. You ask for a hamburger. I reciprocate with a mildly convulsing potato. You disapprove. Your disapproval releases a cosmic shift in the void between birth and life. You ask for a hamburger. A certain small dog feasts on hamburger patties for the rest of its unnatural, eternal endurance. Your constant disapproval sends silence through everything. A contrived beast becomes omnipotent. You ask for a hamburger. I give you a hamburger your body becomes an unsettled blob of nothingness, then divides by three. The papillon barks. The universe realigns itself. You, the papillon, and the hamburger disapprove. This condemnation stops the realignment. Hades freezes over. A pig is launched is launched into the unoccupied existence between space and time with a specific hamburger. You ask for a hamburger. I give you a hamburger. It screams as you lift it to your face. You laugh maniacally as I plead with you. You devour the hamburger as it pleads for mercy. I disapprove and condemn you to an eternity in a certain void where a certain pig and its specific hamburger are located. The Universal Space-time Continuum Committee disapproves of my irrational decision. You are locked away and are fed hamburgers for the rest of your natural existence. A pickle refuses to break down during the process of digestion. You die in a freak accident. A certain pickle lives the rest of its life in a comatose state. Your soul disapproves. Down the street a child cries as a hamburger gets stuck in, and climbs back up, her esophagus. You ask again for a hamburger. I refuse to reciprocate. You demand a lawyer. I remind you harshly that this is the new world order. Lawyers no longer exist. Only papillons. Your name is written on a list of sins. Blasphemy. You ask for a hamburger. The comatose pickle vanquishes your soul from this universe. Realignment occurs. You beg for a hamburger. A certain papillon's name is written on an obelisk in Egypt. Mumble. Peasants worship the obelisk. Your soulless corpse partakes in the festivity. Hamburgers are banned universally. The sun implodes. All planets cease to have ever existed. Mercury. Venus. Earth. Mars. Jupiter. Saturn. Uranus. Neptune. Pluto is the only mass in existence. Conveniently, you are on vacation here. Your need for hamburgers re-establishes space-time. Earth is recreated under your intergalactic rule. Hamburgers are your army. You wake up. Clowns. Clowns everywhere. Your dream rushes to meet you. You are kidnapped. You ask for a hamburger. They hand you a hotdog.


Hmmmm.......should there be a cuils level simply named "Ben Carson"?

Which number should it substitute?
 
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