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(Omaha World-Herald)   Elderly Nebraskan woman credits reaching 100 to "being ornery"   ( divider line
    More: Obvious  
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2363 clicks; posted to Main » on 23 Dec 2003 at 5:26 PM (13 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

48 Comments     (+0 »)
2003-12-23 11:24:18 AM  
What the hell is the "Dirty Thirties"?
2003-12-23 12:00:25 PM  
In other news, Florida credits reaching 100 to "being too stupid to know the brake pedal from gas."
2003-12-23 02:12:04 PM  
I don't know about you, but I don't wanna think about horny 100-year-olds...what? Oh, I see.

What a stupid farking article. The headline leads you in thinking this is a story about a cantankerous old windbag who's defying death, but then does nothing but talk about what a sweet, agreeable old lady she is. Assclowns.

What the hell is the "Dirty Thirties"?

At first I thought it was referring to how women usually hit their sexual peak in their thirties and have uncontrollable urges to slut it up with any stiff piece of meat that strolls by, but I think that term just refers to the Great Depression years and how things were pretty dirty during those times. I like my idea better.
2003-12-23 02:46:39 PM  
I like your idea better too.
2003-12-23 03:40:50 PM  
that's how i got to be 29 - i'm ornery
2003-12-23 05:30:54 PM  
What the fark is ornery? Can someone let a non hick Farker know?
2003-12-23 05:33:56 PM  
Mean-spirited, disagreeable, and contrary in disposition; cantankerous.
[Alteration of ordinary.]

I find the "alteration of ordinary" part the most interesting.

I can attest to orneriness helping people live long. My great grandmother lived to be 100 as well and even though she's long gone her three sons still biatch about how ornery she was.
2003-12-23 05:35:06 PM  
Good to know I could live a long life if my liver doesn't file for divorce.
2003-12-23 05:36:17 PM  
Hmm, I'm at least 10 times as ornery as she seems to be from her statements.

/me looks forward to living to 1000
2003-12-23 05:36:34 PM  
Oh stop griping about how dumb the article was.

In Journalism 101 we learned how to write these
feature crap articles that are supposed to make
people feel good. They're called Human Interest

Now shaddup and Feel Good, or I'll come over there
and slap you into next week.

I'm "ornery."
2003-12-23 05:37:08 PM  
Captain Obvious credits the fact that she did not die yet.
2003-12-23 05:37:11 PM  
Holy cheese sticks Batman! I hurt like hell in the morning and I'm half that age. I can't even imagine what 100 would feel like.
2003-12-23 05:37:12 PM  
get sum educatin'!

"dirty thirties" = the Dust Bowl

Which is, ironically, where our football team is playing this year.
2003-12-23 05:37:18 PM  
I didn't read the article but this:

[image from too old to be available]

is freaking annoying.
2003-12-23 05:37:42 PM  
"travelling the hershey highway on a regular basis."
2003-12-23 05:43:50 PM  
ornery (rn-r)
adj. ornerier, orneriest
Mean-spirited, disagreeable, and contrary in disposition; cantankerous.

Wow... she is an F*cking C*nt. If that is what has made her live so long, then my ex is going to live forever!!!
2003-12-23 05:45:04 PM  
I love talking about old people in the past tense.

"Maar said her grandmother always kept things lively with a story or a joke."
2003-12-23 05:47:37 PM  
I'm pretty familiar with Hastings, NE. I'm pretty sure 100 is about the average age there.
2003-12-23 05:47:51 PM  
Is that John Stamos in the Fark personals?
2003-12-23 05:49:41 PM  
Wow. That does look like John Stamos. Weird.
2003-12-23 05:51:29 PM  
Well I'll be horn suckled in a cow's ass if that wasn't the damnedest thing I ever read.
2003-12-23 05:51:52 PM  
Well darn, this means (insert mean-person butt of joke here) is going to live forever.
2003-12-23 05:53:08 PM  
Oops, Tom-Servo beat me to it.
2003-12-23 05:53:58 PM  
Does she get ornery when she doesn't get her chocolat?
2003-12-23 05:54:57 PM  
Hartman is a little hard of hearing now, but she still has a quick response to questions.

Asked by Maar why she's lived so long, she said, "I don't know; being ornery, I guess."

wow, quick AND well spoken

2003-12-23 05:59:32 PM  
She's 'orny? Does she go? wink wink nudge nudge
2003-12-23 06:01:47 PM  
The secret to long life is making sure that you get plenty of exercise. Working out regularly with a popular Norwegian women's handball team is a good way to go about this.
2003-12-23 06:04:37 PM  
In that case, my grandmother will live FOREVER!
2003-12-23 06:06:08 PM  
Do I make you ornery baby?

[image from too old to be available]
2003-12-23 06:18:44 PM  
Ornery? I guess I've been wasting my time with persnickety.
2003-12-23 06:23:43 PM  
Dirty thirties refers to the great drought of the 1930's all the vegetation dried up so there was nothing to hold the topsoil in place. There were lots of wind storms. The entire midwest was covered in dust. Ever hear the term "Dust Bowl Oklahoma?"
2003-12-23 06:24:09 PM  
Old fart has consumed the social security remittances of over 247 Farkers for decades.

/warm fuzzy human interest stories p1ss me off
2003-12-23 06:35:36 PM  
Man, if being ornery makes one live older, I ain't ever dying, you buncha bastards.
2003-12-23 06:43:33 PM

My Mama says that alligators are ornery because they got all them teeth and no toothbrush.
2003-12-23 06:44:07 PM  
Hey obbop, I used to complain about social security myself when I was in my 20's. Now that I'm in my 40's I only have about 20 years before I qualify for it. I will receive a whopping $400 and some odd change per month. I wouldn't be too concerned about social security. If you plan on that being your sole means of income when your older your in serious trouble. Set up a 401K Dude or some other retirement account now. If you put $200/mo for 10 years and that's all. With the help of compound interest you'll have close to a million dollars in the bank by age 60 assuming your in your 20's now.
2003-12-23 06:47:27 PM  
This word has been the subject of many discussions before.

I pronounce it ORN-REE
But arseholes always want to correct me and say it's ON-REE

I say F* off, bastards!!
2003-12-23 06:51:59 PM  
she came from Washington State?
2003-12-23 06:52:15 PM  
I'm from Lincoln. I hope I'll live a long life.
Although, I'm in California now...Eeek!

Ornree and

/tips hat to Waylon
2003-12-23 07:14:43 PM  
This means Keith Richards is going to live forever.
2003-12-23 07:17:53 PM  
WTF, do they speak English in Nebraska?
2003-12-23 07:21:59 PM  
If this turns out to be a black woman living near Hemingford Home, NE, then I'm getting a little nervous about this latest "flu" epidemic...
2003-12-23 07:28:54 PM  
"WTF, do they speak English in Nebraska?

what's that all aboot, eh?
2003-12-23 08:24:48 PM  
I didn't think cantankerousness would lead to a long life, except Mrs Burns from the simpsons.

"She's 124 years old. All she can do is dial and yell." - Smithers

Sounds like my customers
2003-12-23 09:44:48 PM  
What the hell is the "Dirty Thirties"?

The Dust Bowl years. During the 1930's parts of the western United States (CO, KS, OK, TX, NM, & NB) suffered from a serious drought. It actually affected something like 27 States at it's peak.

The Dust Bowl
2003-12-24 01:58:16 AM  
In Nebraska they're not just ornery, they're cornery.
2003-12-24 04:43:09 AM  
haha, typed ornery in at like the synonym "vinegary". That's one vinegary old lady!
2003-12-24 04:48:12 AM  
...and that Dirty Thirties comment in the story really scares me. Sloppy Seconds are bad enough, who the hell wants Dirty Thirties?!
2003-12-24 02:14:37 PM  
I'm in my dirty thirties....HEE HEEHEEE
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