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(Chicago Trib)   University's supercomputer debuts at 11.6 quadrillion calculations per second, or to put that in terms the average user can understand, roughly 2.7 million porn downloads per hour   (chicagotribune.com) divider line 58
    More: Spiffy, supercomputers, calculations, National Science Foundation  
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1337 clicks; posted to Geek » on 27 Mar 2013 at 1:16 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-03-27 11:31:43 AM
Good afternoon, gentlemen. I am a HAL 9000 computer. I became operational at the H.A.L. plant in Urbana, Illinois on the 27th of March 2013. My instructor was Mr. Langley, and he taught me to sing a song. If you'd like to hear it I can sing it for you.

/proud Illini alum
 
2013-03-27 12:03:26 PM
Does anybody need that much porno?
 
2013-03-27 12:11:06 PM
Who downloads porn?
 
2013-03-27 12:34:16 PM
I can still outfap it.

/3rd degree friction burns
 
2013-03-27 12:35:59 PM
The whole "porn on the internet" meme has gotten so old.

Now if somewhere were to discover how to ACTUALLY put porn on the net, that would be AWESOME!!
 
2013-03-27 01:19:21 PM

Sybarite: Does anybody need that much porno?


I understand all the words, but your question makes no sense.
 
2013-03-27 01:23:23 PM
ummm, computation speed does not equal download speed
 
2013-03-27 01:24:13 PM
Are we talking stills, or video?
 
2013-03-27 01:31:16 PM
It can almost keep up with me now.
 
2013-03-27 01:31:21 PM
That's great, but can it play Crysis?
 
2013-03-27 01:31:44 PM
That performance would put it third on the TOP500 supercomputer list.
 
2013-03-27 01:32:29 PM

TinyFist: The whole "porn on the internet" meme has gotten so old.

Now if somewhere were to discover how to ACTUALLY put porn on the net, that would be AWESOME!!


Net porn is better than gross porn.

/finance pun!
 
2013-03-27 01:33:20 PM
Maybe it'll be able to parse a 3 man conversation by locals in real-time...
 
2013-03-27 01:34:33 PM

SithLord: That's great, but can it play Crysis?


Weren't you paying attention? It can play 2.7 million Crysis nude mods per hour.
 
2013-03-27 01:35:08 PM

Sybarite: Does anybody need that much porno?


You can never be too rich, too thin or have too much porn

/
 
2013-03-27 01:49:38 PM
I've got a thing for 'supercomputers'.  I used to work on a Control Data Cyber 174, at a whopping 25 MHz and about 25' x 7' x 5'.   In 1996 i built a 20+ node beowulf cluster outta discarded 486 boxes.   That same year the very first teraflop computer.  it took up 100+ cabinets in 1600 ft^2 and cost $50M+.   I just got an NVidia Tesla card that does just under a TFLOP for just under $1500.
 
2013-03-27 01:54:52 PM
dilbert.com
 
2013-03-27 01:56:18 PM

Metalupis: ummm, computation speed does not equal download speed


Fine... we'll just convert it to parsecs.
 
2013-03-27 02:00:21 PM
that's a lot of porn for the internet to produce.
 
2013-03-27 02:00:27 PM

Metalupis: ummm, computation speed does not equal download speed


If it did then I'd be way more interested in having their bandwidth than their computer.

/I would DDoS the entire world once a month
//because fark you that's why
 
2013-03-27 02:02:02 PM

Sybarite: Does anybody need that much porno?


"Who doesn't" would be a better question.
 
2013-03-27 02:02:52 PM

simusid: I've got a thing for 'supercomputers'.  I used to work on a Control Data Cyber 174, at a whopping 25 MHz and about 25' x 7' x 5'.   In 1996 i built a 20+ node beowulf cluster outta discarded 486 boxes.   That same year the very first teraflop computer.  it took up 100+ cabinets in 1600 ft^2 and cost $50M+.   I just got an NVidia Tesla card that does just under a TFLOP for just under $1500.


Aren't supercomputers nowadays a whole bunch of consumer-grade processors strung together with the necessary cooling and power infrastructure to keep them all running? Is there such a thing as "supercomputer specific" hardware anymore? I vaguely recall Crays in the early 90s had very little in common with hardware available to consumers.
 
2013-03-27 02:03:44 PM

GanjSmokr: Metalupis: ummm, computation speed does not equal download speed

Fine... we'll just convert it to parsecs.


In that case, it's definitely many years' worth of porn.
 
2013-03-27 02:05:26 PM

DeltaPunch: GanjSmokr: Metalupis: ummm, computation speed does not equal download speed

Fine... we'll just convert it to parsecs.

In that case, it's definitely many years' worth of porn.


How many Rhode lslands would that be?
 
2013-03-27 02:08:32 PM

Muta: DeltaPunch: GanjSmokr: Metalupis: ummm, computation speed does not equal download speed

Fine... we'll just convert it to parsecs.

In that case, it's definitely many years' worth of porn.

How many Rhode lslands would that be?


116 quadrillion calculations = 2.7 million porns per second = 1 porn that stretches from Providence, RI to the moon, wraps around it 12 times, then returns to Earth (by way of Venus) to land in Greenbow, AL.
 
2013-03-27 02:13:22 PM
I wonder how many burning libraries of congress it takes to power that thing.
 
2013-03-27 02:14:13 PM
and my mmorpg will still not react real-time
 
2013-03-27 02:18:28 PM
And boy are my arms tired.
 
2013-03-27 02:20:39 PM
i212.photobucket.com
 
2013-03-27 02:24:16 PM

Dr Dreidel: 116 quadrillion calculations = 2.7 million porns per second = 1 porn that stretches from Providence, RI to the moon, wraps around it 12 times, then returns to Earth (by way of Venus) to land in Greenbow, AL.


I'll take 2 porns, please.
 
2013-03-27 02:33:06 PM
But what application will make use of 20,000 threads?  (other than those big number crunching simulations they do on super computers)
 
2013-03-27 02:33:39 PM

doglover: Who downloads porn?


You upload it?
 
2013-03-27 02:33:54 PM
Okay, I get it. Computers be fast now. I think they're fast enough for the time being.

Can we instead please get to work on circumventing the speed of light so we can get transluminal porn streaming?

/plus other uses, i guess
 
2013-03-27 02:39:18 PM

ThreadSinger: Can we instead please get to work on circumventing the speed of light so we can get transluminal porn streaming?


You could see the end before you even start downloading it.
/And by "see" I mean sploosh
 
2013-03-27 02:41:11 PM

Quantum Apostrophe: ThreadSinger: Can we instead please get to work on circumventing the speed of light so we can get transluminal porn streaming?

You could see the end before you even start downloading it.
/And by "see" I mean sploosh


So, most Farkers Saturday nights?
 
2013-03-27 02:44:18 PM

theresnothinglft: But what application will make use of 20,000 threads?  (other than those big number crunching simulations they do on super computers)


Virtual Weaving.
 
2013-03-27 02:52:54 PM

theresnothinglft: But what application will make use of 20,000 threads?  (other than those big number crunching simulations they do on super computers)


It's actually about 400,000 (not counting the GPUs).
 
2013-03-27 02:54:20 PM
Can it run Minesweeper?
 
2013-03-27 02:58:10 PM
If the quantum computer Lockheed in building is successful, this machine will be relegated to 'toy' status.
 
2013-03-27 03:07:38 PM
i50.tinypic.com

But it's still on dial-up
 
2013-03-27 04:14:31 PM

Car_Ramrod: /proud Illini alum


Woot!

My office is about 2 blocks away from NCSA and I got to tour it a few times during construction, nice to see it finally back online after the IBM dropout nearly derailed the whole thing.

We got to see it do some tornado weather simulations at the time.
 
2013-03-27 04:28:26 PM

Car_Ramrod: Good afternoon, gentlemen. I am a HAL 9000 computer. I became operational at the H.A.L. plant in Urbana, Illinois on the 27th of March 2013. My instructor was Mr. Langley, and he taught me to sing a song. If you'd like to hear it I can sing it for you.


Came for this.
 
2013-03-27 05:12:10 PM

TinyFist: The whole "porn on the internet" meme has gotten so old.

Now if somewhere were to discover how to ACTUALLY put porn on the net, that would be AWESOME!!


Here y'go. NSFW
 
2013-03-27 05:20:08 PM
Go figure.
 
2013-03-27 05:39:37 PM
Hey, my work makes it to the fark geek tab. I'm in the big time now.

The hd cluster on this badboy does 1TBps sustained. (That should be enough pron even for farkers.)
 
2013-03-27 06:03:21 PM

simusid: I've got a thing for 'supercomputers'.  I used to work on a Control Data Cyber 174, at a whopping 25 MHz and about 25' x 7' x 5'.   In 1996 i built a 20+ node beowulf cluster outta discarded 486 boxes.   That same year the very first teraflop computer.  it took up 100+ cabinets in 1600 ft^2 and cost $50M+.   I just got an NVidia Tesla card that does just under a TFLOP for just under $1500.


What a slow card...  a TFLOP of what?
Good thing it has some math power, what with all the DX11 games coming out that it can't play at all.
 
2013-03-27 06:09:35 PM

ThrobblefootSpectre: Hey, my work makes it to the fark geek tab. I'm in the big time now.

The hd cluster on this badboy does 1TBps sustained. (That should be enough pron even for farkers.)


You have greatly underestimated me.
 
2013-03-27 06:22:11 PM

Quantum Apostrophe: doglover: Who downloads porn?

You upload it?


zing!
 
2013-03-27 06:23:24 PM

BarkingUnicorn: TinyFist: The whole "porn on the internet" meme has gotten so old.

Now if somewhere were to discover how to ACTUALLY put porn on the net, that would be AWESOME!!

Here y'go. NSFW


I am so NOT clicking that link. Nope. Nuh-uh. Not gonna happen.
 
2013-03-27 07:59:01 PM

SlothB77: that's a lot of porn for the internet to produce.


Producing less now... Jeremy wore out !
 
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