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(Some Guy)   This is the thread where you defend what you believe in and call everyone else's believes bollocks. Now with a Venn diagram for easy navigation   (crispian-jago.blogspot.co.uk) divider line 84
    More: Cool, Venn diagram, critical thinking  
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16607 clicks; posted to Main » on 26 Mar 2013 at 3:55 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Archived thread
2013-03-26 04:05:34 PM  
10 votes:
Never mind the bollocks.
memeboss.com
Here's the Sex Pistols.
2013-03-26 05:15:44 PM  
8 votes:

Day_Old_Dutchie: Bollocks.
[s21.postimg.org image 375x500]
The bullocks bollocks.


I think I can follow that up with a Venn diagram:

www.smbc-comics.com
2013-03-26 12:07:24 PM  
8 votes:

kvinesknows: I was promised a Venn diagram in thread.


s24.postimg.org
2013-03-26 04:47:32 PM  
7 votes:
2.bp.blogspot.com
2013-03-26 04:37:37 PM  
7 votes:
I went to a doctor once and he spent the entire 45 minute exam with his finger up my ass.  I guess it was a doctor.  He only spoke Spanish and I paid him in paper tickets.  But I felt good knowing that I at least had some level of access to health care.
2013-03-26 04:28:00 PM  
6 votes:

kvinesknows: I was promised a Venn diagram in thread.


i.imgur.com
2013-03-26 03:23:36 PM  
6 votes:
i.chzbgr.com
2013-03-26 10:14:14 AM  
6 votes:
Well, I believe in the soul, the cock, the pussy, the small of a woman's back, the hanging curve ball, high fiber, good scotch, that the novels of Susan Sontag are self-indulgent, overrated crap. I believe Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone. I believe there ought to be a constitutional amendment outlawing Astroturf and the designated hitter. I believe in the sweet spot, soft-core pornography, opening your presents Christmas morning rather than Christmas Eve and I believe in long, slow, deep, soft, wet kisses that last three days.

[pauses then winks and walks away]
2013-03-26 07:36:19 PM  
5 votes:
www.smidgeindustriesltd.com
2013-03-26 04:42:51 PM  
5 votes:

DesertDemonWY: [i1057.photobucket.com image 700x537]


i.imgur.com
ftfy.
2013-03-26 04:24:29 PM  
5 votes:
en.wikifur.com

I LOVE GOOGLE!
2013-03-26 04:19:15 PM  
5 votes:

Moonfisher: Tarot also belongs in the religion circle. Our church when I was a kid told us that tarot decks were possessed by demons and using them invited the demon into you. The deck I got as a teenager never did anything exciting, so I am dissappoint.


I once played poker with a tarot deck.  I got a full house and my neighbor died.
2013-03-26 03:58:01 PM  
5 votes:

Earguy: Well, I believe in the soul, the cock, the pussy, the small of a woman's back, the hanging curve ball, high fiber, good scotch, that the novels of Susan Sontag are self-indulgent, overrated crap. I believe Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone. I believe there ought to be a constitutional amendment outlawing Astroturf and the designated hitter. I believe in the sweet spot, soft-core pornography, opening your presents Christmas morning rather than Christmas Eve and I believe in long, slow, deep, soft, wet kisses that last three days.

[pauses then winks and walks away]


If it has a steady paycheck, I'll believe anything you say
2013-03-26 10:54:24 AM  
5 votes:
I like turtles
2013-03-26 10:13:00 AM  
5 votes:
So THATS why Scientology manages to stomp on my nerves every time it's mentioned. It's the culmination of all aspects of bollocks!

Thank's OP, today I have learned something :D
2013-03-26 03:12:55 PM  
4 votes:

SlothB77: ROLFing?  is that like ROTFLMAO?


Does this turn you on? If so, you might be a ROWLFer.

25.media.tumblr.com
2013-03-26 12:41:21 PM  
4 votes:
i105.photobucket.com
2013-03-26 05:54:16 PM  
3 votes:

Loadmaster: Dude, that doesn't even rhyme.


A myth is religion plus time
one hundred percent of the time
We've never had gods
just trolls and Fark mods
and dark rum with cola and lime
2013-03-26 05:27:59 PM  
3 votes:
s21.postimg.org
2013-03-26 04:42:48 PM  
3 votes:

Earguy: Well, I believe in the soul....


Pfft.

I believe in rainbows, and puppy dogs and fairy tales. And I believe
in the family: Mom, and Dad, and Grandma, and Uncle Todd, who waves
his penis.

And I believe in 8 of the Ten Commandments, and I believe in going to
church every Sunday, unless there's a game on.

And I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, wholesome, and
natural things that money can buy.

And I believe it's derogatory to refer to a woman's breasts as "boobs",
"jugs", "winnebagos", or "golden bozos". And you should only refer to
them as "hooters".

And I believe you should place a woman on a pedestal, high enough so
you can look up her dress.

And I believe in equality, equality for everyone, no matter how stupid
they are, or how much better I am than they are.

And people say I'm crazy for believing this, but I believe that robots
are stealing my luggage.

And I believe I made a mistake when I bought a 30-story, one-bedroom
apartment.

And I believe that the "Battle of the Network Stars" should be fought
with guns.

And I believe that Ronald Reagan can make this country what it once
was: an arctic region, covered with ice.

And I believe the United States should all foreigners in this country,
provided they can speak our native language: Apache.

And lastly, I believe that of all the evils on this earth, there is
nothing worse than the music you are listening to right now.
2013-03-26 04:30:35 PM  
3 votes:

Speaker2Animals: God is a concept, by which we measure our pain.


A comma is a punctuation mark, which is often overused.
2013-03-26 04:08:40 PM  
3 votes:
I like big bollocks and I cannot lie
2013-03-26 04:04:24 PM  
3 votes:
Rolfing ?

img69.imageshack.us
2013-03-26 03:09:32 PM  
3 votes:
I believe in miracles.  Where you from?
2013-03-26 10:10:21 AM  
3 votes:
I was promised a Venn diagram in thread.
2013-03-26 06:55:07 PM  
2 votes:

Ambitwistor: That was the very same link that I cited in my original response to you, which shows that acupuncture is NOT more than just a placebo. The estimated effect size is so small that, as the article points out, it "it falls below the minimally accepted threshold for a clinically noticeable reduction in pain. The authors even speculated that it was so low that it could not be distinguished from bias that might result from the difficulty in truly double-blinding acupuncture studies."


They really need to be more careful where they stick those needles.
2013-03-26 06:07:31 PM  
2 votes:

ACunningPlan:

TheOmni: There's at least eight things on that diagram that I've never even heard of before. Rolfing? I'm really hoping that's not what I think it is.

Glad I'm not the only one:)  I'm almost afraid to ask, but what's cupping?

It's a TSA procedure.  Here's a training photo:

i49.tinypic.com
2013-03-26 05:43:10 PM  
2 votes:

WhippingBoy: I believe the children are our future.
Teach them well and let them lead the way.

Unless we stop them now.
2013-03-26 05:33:16 PM  
2 votes:

Farce-Side: I thought we already had this thread.


If we had, deja vu would be on the Venn diagram.
2013-03-26 05:07:02 PM  
2 votes:

diaphoresis: I believe 97% of Farkers are clueless, emotionally-driven moron with no concept of anything they haven't been brainwashed to believe.

the other 3% are badgered and ridiculed for trying to have intelligent discussions without all the drama... which makes them the dumbest people on Fark for believing they can have such a thing.

PROVE ME WRONG!


Well...that's just like, your opinion man...
2013-03-26 05:06:38 PM  
2 votes:

MBooda: Where's Atheism, the belief that there's no God?


static.prtst.net
m00
2013-03-26 05:06:03 PM  
2 votes:
www.smbc-comics.com
2013-03-26 04:31:51 PM  
2 votes:
I can't stand those who are intolerant of other cultures.
/And the Dutch.
2013-03-26 04:25:00 PM  
2 votes:
I believe the children are our future.
Teach them well and let them lead the way.
2013-03-26 04:24:29 PM  
2 votes:
People still believe in lei lines?

www.airportleigreeting.com
2013-03-26 04:20:00 PM  
2 votes:
Bullocks
www.hilaryshepherd.com
2013-03-26 04:16:28 PM  
2 votes:

GiantRex: Jubeebee: Why is detox in quackery/psuedoscience? Doesn't drug rehab show a lot of real efficacy?

The detox that this diagram includes is not the drug rehab kind (which does show a lot of real efficacy). It's the kind of detox in which people try to rid their bodies of mysterious unnamed "toxins" by dubious methods, usually by buying a blatantly bullshiat product. The product I've heard the most about is a type of pad that you stick on your feet. After you've left the pad on for a while, it turns brown and smelly, and when you remove it the damn thing looks just awful because it "sucked the toxins of of your body" through your feet. Chemical analysis of these pads shows that they are actually simple adhesive pads laced with chemicals that react with oils and bacteria commonly found on feet to cause the brown color and bad smell, which is just for show.


I thought those were just called socks.
Those commercials are funny. I like how the guy says they work to remove toxins from your body the same way a tree does. By taking in energy from the sun and dispensing the toxins out of the roots. Not only is that not how your body works, that's not even how a farking tree works.
2013-03-26 04:15:13 PM  
2 votes:

ACunningPlan: TheOmni: There's at least eight things on that diagram that I've never even heard of before. Rolfing? I'm really hoping that's not what I think it is.

Glad I'm not the only one:)  I'm almost afraid to ask, but what's cupping?


Alternative medicine hickies.
2013-03-26 04:06:07 PM  
2 votes:

hinten: Fark, where everyone biatches about bad grammar but nobody can state what is actually wrong.


Should be:

Fark: where everyone biatches about bad grammar but nobody can state what is actually wrong.
2013-03-26 12:32:40 PM  
2 votes:
i1057.photobucket.com
2013-03-28 03:16:17 AM  
1 votes:

Z-clipped:


So how do you feel about the phrase "There is no Santa Claus"? Does it provoke you to argue? What do you assume about the person who says it?

How do I feel?  I would think that the person saying it doesn't believe that Santa Claus is real.  That would not surprise me.  As to arguing...  I just MIGHT be tempted to point out that SC is based upon a real person, but that lots of stories built up around this person.  Incidentally, I might say the same to someone who said "There is no Jesus."  Of course, some things are easier to prove than others...

www.nobodygoeshere.com
2013-03-27 05:23:35 AM  
1 votes:

Z-clipped: Atheism and agnosticism are not exclusive. See above. Agnosticism is an epistemological position, not a theological one.


Replace "theological" with "ontological" and you're dead on. And to keep in the theme of the thread:

www.smidgeindustriesltd.com
=Smidge=
2013-03-26 07:51:41 PM  
1 votes:
m.cdn.blog.hu

I firmly believe in smashing two bricks together
2013-03-26 07:24:01 PM  
1 votes:

ariseatex:

I believe in life after love.
... and autotune.
2013-03-26 07:05:12 PM  
1 votes:
Acupuncture?

Yeah, the whole "realignment of your energy paths" may be bollucks, but it can demonstrably be used to reduce or stop pain when needles are put in the right place to block nerve signals.
2013-03-26 06:46:20 PM  
1 votes:
Q&D
i45.tinypic.com
2013-03-26 06:24:07 PM  
1 votes:

Ambitwistor: willfullyobscure: Dude, it works on horses and rabbits. There are dozens of studies that show it's not a placebo.

As I said, that turns out not to be the case.  You can find studies that show an effect.  You can find many more that don't.  That's why people conduct meta-analyses:  to see what the total weight of evidence across all the studies shows.  And the meta-analyses always show that there isn't any large consistent effect distinguishable from a placebo.

The major thing we don't understand about acupuncture is how and why it works.

The major thing we don't understand is why people believe it's not a placebo, despite all evidence to the contrary.  (Well, we do understand much of that:  selective cherry-picking of studies.)


Well, here is a nice discussion of a recent metastudy that shows beyond any shadow of a doubt, that acunpuncture is more than just placebo. Amply illustrated and easy to understand. Give it a read, I think you'll see that you're beaten- its right there in black and white.
2013-03-26 06:20:18 PM  
1 votes:
GeneralJim: Tell me if you see a face in the following image:
[www.shroudofturin.com image]


Rindred:
I see a lamp, sitting on a table, casting a faint light around it.

FSM. Evidence:

upload.wikimedia.org
2013-03-26 06:10:26 PM  
1 votes:

meat0918: Even today, we are constantly amazed at the lengths people will go to in order to manufacture new hoaxes and scams.


Is congress in session again?
2013-03-26 06:02:09 PM  
1 votes:

MaxxLarge: GeneralJim: MaxxLarge: No gods have ever been real, or will ever be real... Period.And you would prove that statement.... How, exactly?

I don't need to. It's BEEN proven via history, biology, astronomy, physics, and a hundred other disciplines.


I proved it with tea leaves and phrenology.
2013-03-26 05:33:13 PM  
1 votes:
If I like you, I would strongly recommend you not fark my sisters.
2013-03-26 05:14:42 PM  
1 votes:

meanmutton: meanmutton: MaxxLarge: Mythology is just religion plus time. Forever and always, 100% of the time. No gods have ever been real, or will ever be real... Period.

That's an amazingly unscientific viewpoint.

In case you're wondering, the scientific viewpoint is: No credible evidence has been put forth to lead to a reasonable conclusion that gods exist; thus, we do not accept their existence but are willing to review this conclusion should new evidence be presented.


"Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen." - Hebrews 11:1 (KJV)

God doesn't need your review to justify His existence.  That's why He's God, and you're not.
2013-03-26 05:09:05 PM  
1 votes:

The Pope of Manwich Village: [2.bp.blogspot.com image 510x505]


Loo: And who are they?
Dr. Klahn: Refuse, found in waterfront bars.
Loo: Shanghaied?Dr. Klahn: Just lost drunken men who don't know where they are and no longer care.
Prisoner #1: Where are we?
Prisoner #2: I don't care!
Loo: And these?
Dr. Klahn: These are lost drunken men who don't know where they are, but do care! And these are men who know where they are and care, but don't drink.
Prisoner #3: I don't know who I am?
Prisoner #4: And I don't drink!
Dr. Klahn: Guards! [to prisoner] Do you care?
Prisoner #5: No.
Dr. Klahn: Put this man in cell #1, and give him a drink.
Guard: What do you drink?
Prisoner #5: I don't care.
2013-03-26 05:02:55 PM  
1 votes:

Farce-Side: I thought we already had this thread.


This topic is basically every single thread on Fark.
2013-03-26 04:54:33 PM  
1 votes:

Ennuipoet: I don't believe in Venn diagrams!


Where's your god now?


Let this circle represent the set of things you don't believe in. Are Venn diagrams contained in that circle?
2013-03-26 04:52:24 PM  
1 votes:
Boobies are good, boobies are healing, boobies sooth the soul and ease the mind. Boobies are like sports cars, meant to roam free and not be confined in cages where they are unhappy. Free the boobies!
2013-03-26 04:50:08 PM  
1 votes:
I believe in life after love.
2013-03-26 04:47:41 PM  
1 votes:
That's a keeper.
2013-03-26 04:44:22 PM  
1 votes:
I believe I'll have another beer.
2013-03-26 04:41:08 PM  
1 votes:

js34603: I believe in nothing.

/yes it is exhausting


Farking Nihilists!
3.bp.blogspot.com
/hot like a nihilist's over-driven brain
2013-03-26 04:40:41 PM  
1 votes:
Bollocks.
s21.postimg.org
The bullocks bollocks.
2013-03-26 04:38:23 PM  
1 votes:
2013-03-26 04:33:33 PM  
1 votes:
I believe hokey religions and ancient weapons are no match for a good blaster at your side.


/or 1911a1 .45, as the case may be
2013-03-26 04:31:19 PM  
1 votes:

WhippingBoy: I believe the children are our future.
Teach them well and let them lead the way.


You take that back right now, pervert.
2013-03-26 04:30:25 PM  
1 votes:

ACunningPlan: Glad I'm not the only one:) I'm almost afraid to ask, but what's cupping?


Light BDSM play masked under the cloak of psudeoscience, much like acupuncture and most other home cures.  Of course hitting my testicles with a hammer will distract me from that toothache. Why didn't I think of that?
2013-03-26 04:28:47 PM  
1 votes:

Rixel: [en.wikifur.com image 500x300]

I LOVE GOOGLE!


i105.photobucket.com
2013-03-26 04:14:39 PM  
1 votes:
Tarot also belongs in the religion circle. Our church when I was a kid told us that tarot decks were possessed by demons and using them invited the demon into you. The deck I got as a teenager never did anything exciting, so I am dissappoint.
2013-03-26 04:07:54 PM  
1 votes:
Hitting you right in the believes.
2013-03-26 04:03:58 PM  
1 votes:
I know most chiropractors are quacks, but dammit, mine has saved my life repeatedly.

/slight exaggeration
//slight
2013-03-26 04:03:30 PM  
1 votes:

Satanic_Hamster: I believes that subby is a semi-literate monkey who somehow got access to the internet.


I believe this is not bollocks.
2013-03-26 04:02:44 PM  
1 votes:
img854.imageshack.us
2013-03-26 04:02:28 PM  
1 votes:

hinten: Psychic Surgery sounds totally legit and I'm looking forward to getting my appendicitis fixed that way.


I thought about trying psychic liposuction, but I decided not to once I realized that even if it worked, it was going to suck.

/not even fat
2013-03-26 03:58:22 PM  
1 votes:

FloydA: Rolfing is a form of massage that is supposed to "balance" the body and "optimize" muscle use (those terms are not explicitly defined).


Oh, now I'm actually kind of disappointed. I was imagining some sort of therapeutic purging. Something to do with balancing humors or vapors. Like blood letting, but with vomit.
2013-03-26 03:35:30 PM  
1 votes:
Well, after a quick detour over to Youtube, I now know what ear candling is.  Looks like the most useless practice ever invented.
2013-03-26 03:35:27 PM  
1 votes:
Why is detox in quackery/psuedoscience? Doesn't drug rehab show a lot of real efficacy?
2013-03-26 03:29:41 PM  
1 votes:
Fark, where everyone biatches about bad grammar but nobody can state what is actually wrong.
2013-03-26 03:29:07 PM  
1 votes:

hinten: Psychic Surgery sounds totally legit and I'm looking forward to getting my appendicitis fixed that way.


What psychic surgery might look like:
gatherer.wizards.com
2013-03-26 03:18:58 PM  
1 votes:
Psychic Surgery sounds totally legit and I'm looking forward to getting my appendicitis fixed that way.
2013-03-26 03:13:52 PM  
1 votes:
I don't believe in Venn diagrams!


Where's your god now?
2013-03-26 11:45:13 AM  
1 votes:

Nogrhi: I believe in grammar.


wat does you mean?
2013-03-26 11:42:02 AM  
1 votes:
I believe in grammar.
2013-03-26 11:01:12 AM  
1 votes:
ROLFing?  is that like ROTFLMAO?
2013-03-26 10:52:02 AM  
1 votes:
I believe that prior to our birth we are not alive.

I believe that after our death we are also not alive.

I do not believe that these two instances (of being not alive) are any different. Both are the same... that is nothingness.
2013-03-26 10:38:01 AM  
1 votes:
God is a concept, by which we measure our pain.
 
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