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(TMZ)   Former WWF wrestler X-Pac tears his anus. The Iron Sheik wonders if he feels humble now   (tmz.com) divider line 66
    More: Strange, Sean Waltman, WWF, Iron Sheik, wrestlers  
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3706 clicks; posted to Sports » on 26 Mar 2013 at 8:25 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-03-26 07:20:30 AM
Remarkable.
 
2013-03-26 08:29:09 AM
Eat more fiber
 
2013-03-26 08:29:47 AM
Anus trifecta? In my Fark?
It's more likely than you think.
 
2013-03-26 08:34:40 AM
And people think that a DP is hard to get the mechanics right.  Today we get the incredibly rare triple green anus.... amazing
 
2013-03-26 08:39:28 AM
I prefer to think of him as the 1-2-Thr-OOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWW Kid.
 
2013-03-26 08:41:30 AM
Looks like his bronco...

*puts on sunglasses*

busted.
 
2013-03-26 08:45:07 AM
I got 2 words for ya:

TUCKS IT!
 
2013-03-26 08:51:14 AM
Good opportunity to market my anus cup.
 
2013-03-26 08:59:09 AM
Quote from his girlfriend: "Believe it or not...this has happened to him once before!"

If I had a job where I tore my anus even once, I would be looking for a different line of work.
 
2013-03-26 09:01:51 AM
So, I guess Billy Gunn can't use "Bad Ass" as his nickname any more.
 
2013-03-26 09:27:14 AM
"It was torn once before Gorilla."

"No, Brain..."

"Chyna did it."

"Brain..."

"With her cl..."

"NO! WILL YOU STOP?"
 
2013-03-26 09:27:35 AM
BAH GAWD! THAT MANS ANUS HAS BEEN BROKEN IN HALF! STOP THE DAMN MATCH!
 
2013-03-26 09:47:05 AM
I thought for sure this would be clenis related
 
2013-03-26 10:01:36 AM

Ackbarican_Idol: I thought for sure this would be clenis related


What isn't clenis related?
 
2013-03-26 10:05:48 AM
Did it happen as the oil hit it?
 
2013-03-26 10:12:34 AM
Heh. I didn't know Sean Waltman was still wrestling. Apparently he's not doing it very well. I like how TFA notes that, after ripping his butthole, he lost the match.
 
2013-03-26 10:12:53 AM

Bobby_and_The_Gorilla: "It was torn once before Gorilla."

"No, Brain..."

"Chyna did it."

"Brain..."

"With her cl..."

"NO! WILL YOU STOP?"


+1

miss those two
 
2013-03-26 10:19:35 AM
Did he apply Preparation Triple H?
 
2013-03-26 10:39:13 AM
BAH GAWD KING!  THAT ANUS HAS A FAMILY!
 
2013-03-26 10:48:41 AM
How do you tear your anus? I definetly know there are plenty of Farkers here that can answer that question.
 
2013-03-26 10:54:36 AM

8Fingers: How do you tear your anus? I definetly know there are plenty of Farkers here that can answer that question.


I just slammed my anus into a turnbuckle. So very scared..........
 
2013-03-26 11:10:14 AM
"HE'S STOMPIN' A MUDHOLE IN HIM, AND WALKIN' IT DRRRRRYYYYYYYYYYY!"
 
2013-03-26 11:18:11 AM

beerrun: 8Fingers: How do you tear your anus? I definetly know there are plenty of Farkers here that can answer that question.

I just slammed my anus into a turnbuckle. So very scared..........


Aren't turnbuckles usually covered by something George the animal Steel used to eat?
 
2013-03-26 11:18:55 AM
 
2013-03-26 11:28:46 AM
So, even if he performed the move correctly, it would involve attacking a man's skull with your testicles?
 
2013-03-26 11:52:13 AM

Sgt Otter: So, even if he performed the move correctly, it would involve attacking a man's skull with your testicles?


Their chest with your buttocks. But yeah, it's a silly homoerotic move.
 
2013-03-26 11:53:48 AM

Treygreen13: Sgt Otter: So, even if he performed the move correctly, it would involve attacking a man's skull with your testicles?

Their chest with your buttocks. But yeah, it's a silly homoerotic move.


It's basically a highly unerotic form of facesitting.  Kind of like the "stinkface" Rikishi used.
 
2013-03-26 12:04:00 PM

tnpir: Treygreen13: Sgt Otter: So, even if he performed the move correctly, it would involve attacking a man's skull with your testicles?

Their chest with your buttocks. But yeah, it's a silly homoerotic move.

It's basically a highly unerotic form of facesitting.  Kind of like the "stinkface" Rikishi used.


The only reason it really stands out as "very homoerotic" in a sea of homoerotic maneuvers is because of X-Pac's ridiculous crotch-chopping before and after it.
 
2013-03-26 12:11:26 PM
Speaking of the Sheik, I came across this when checking out the Superstorm Sandy charity auction mentioned on RAW last night...

http://www.charitybuzz.com/catalog_items/344099?ref=org

Awesome gift for any fWc member
 
2013-03-26 12:17:47 PM

RoyFokker'sGhost: Speaking of the Sheik, I came across this when checking out the Superstorm Sandy charity auction mentioned on RAW last night...

http://www.charitybuzz.com/catalog_items/344099?ref=org

Awesome gift for any fWc member


smartautocar.com
 
2013-03-26 12:39:29 PM
 REAL QUESTION for WWE fans:

How do they determine the story lines of who wins, who becomes a big star, and who disappears?  Is it based off T-shirt sales or something, and the guy who sells the most shiat gets more time in front of the crowd?
 
2013-03-26 12:45:11 PM

fickenchucker: REAL QUESTION for WWE fans:

How do they determine the story lines of who wins, who becomes a big star, and who disappears?  Is it based off T-shirt sales or something, and the guy who sells the most shiat gets more time in front of the crowd?


Depends. Are you porking the boss's daughter?
 
2013-03-26 12:47:46 PM

fickenchucker:  REAL QUESTION for WWE fans:

How do they determine the story lines of who wins, who becomes a big star, and who disappears?  Is it based off T-shirt sales or something, and the guy who sells the most shiat gets more time in front of the crowd?


WWE pays real close attention to the quarter hour ratings, so if they find more people tuning in when a specific wrestler is on, that guy will get more air time.

Crowd reation and 'on-line' buzz plays into it too, along with a ton of backstage politics, writers ideas, injuries to other stars...etc...

Ultimately a wrestler has to sell himself to the company, the fans in the arena and the fans at home...and if he can pull that off he gets more screen time.
 
2013-03-26 12:55:42 PM

BKITU: RoyFokker'sGhost: Speaking of the Sheik, I came across this when checking out the Superstorm Sandy charity auction mentioned on RAW last night...

http://www.charitybuzz.com/catalog_items/344099?ref=org

Awesome gift for any fWc member


If I had any money I would bid on this then have Sheik send it to First National Bastard ftw, lulz
 
2013-03-26 01:06:31 PM

8Fingers: How do you tear your anus? I definetly know there are plenty of Farkers here that can answer that question.


Not so CSB...my oldest brother wrecked his bike.  Big ol' Gold Wind.  Somehow he drifted off the highway, ended up going over the handlebars.  Landed on his backside.  Yeah, severely torn anus upon impact.  Had temporary colostomy for a few months.  He had reconstructive sphincter surgery (Yeah, I had no idea either), colostomy reversed and pretty much everything worked as before.

Moral of the story...if you've never ridden bikes, don't let your midlife crisis be the biggest damn bike you can find.
 
2013-03-26 01:12:16 PM
Maybe now he should call himself Goatse-Pac.
 
2013-03-26 01:22:37 PM
i1182.photobucket.com
 
2013-03-26 01:27:21 PM

dallylamma: fickenchucker:  REAL QUESTION for WWE fans:

How do they determine the story lines of who wins, who becomes a big star, and who disappears?  Is it based off T-shirt sales or something, and the guy who sells the most shiat gets more time in front of the crowd?

WWE pays real close attention to the quarter hour ratings, so if they find more people tuning in when a specific wrestler is on, that guy will get more air time.

Crowd reation and 'on-line' buzz plays into it too, along with a ton of backstage politics, writers ideas, injuries to other stars...etc...

Ultimately a wrestler has to sell himself to the company, the fans in the arena and the fans at home...and if he can pull that off he gets more screen time.


Case in point: Zack Ryder, who put together his "Z! True Long Island Story" web series when he got pushed off TV for quite some time (he'd been involved in a few things previously, and in fact is a former tag champ with Curt Hawkins, which I just learned); that started a groundswell of support that finally got him back on TV. They run hot and cold on people, though; last night he was part of the Jobber Squad that got crushed by The Shield.
 
2013-03-26 01:34:33 PM

Sgt Otter: So, even if he performed the move correctly, it would involve attacking a man's skull with your testicles?


Hey, he earned that X-Pac heat somehow.
 
2013-03-26 01:35:49 PM

ShiningWizard: BKITU: RoyFokker'sGhost: Speaking of the Sheik, I came across this when checking out the Superstorm Sandy charity auction mentioned on RAW last night...

http://www.charitybuzz.com/catalog_items/344099?ref=org

Awesome gift for any fWc member

If I had any money I would bid on this then have Sheik send it to First National Bastard ftw, lulz


I see how it is.
 
2013-03-26 01:41:25 PM

Five Tails of Fury: dallylamma: fickenchucker:  REAL QUESTION for WWE fans:

How do they determine the story lines of who wins, who becomes a big star, and who disappears?  Is it based off T-shirt sales or something, and the guy who sells the most shiat gets more time in front of the crowd?

WWE pays real close attention to the quarter hour ratings, so if they find more people tuning in when a specific wrestler is on, that guy will get more air time.

Crowd reation and 'on-line' buzz plays into it too, along with a ton of backstage politics, writers ideas, injuries to other stars...etc...

Ultimately a wrestler has to sell himself to the company, the fans in the arena and the fans at home...and if he can pull that off he gets more screen time.

Case in point: Zack Ryder, who put together his "Z! True Long Island Story" web series when he got pushed off TV for quite some time (he'd been involved in a few things previously, and in fact is a former tag champ with Curt Hawkins, which I just learned); that started a groundswell of support that finally got him back on TV. They run hot and cold on people, though; last night he was part of the Jobber Squad that got crushed by The Shield.


Addendum to this: it is NOT uncommon (in fact, it's all too common) for certain wrestlers to get big pushes because management (read: Vince McMahon) likes their look, especially if they're massively muscled. For his first four years in the company, HHH was far less muscular and significantly more slender than he is now.  He took time off for an injury, come back pushing 280 pounds of solid muscle, and started getting pushed to the moon.  The push has literally continued for the last dozen years; even when HHH was getting nothing but negative heat due to the relentless pushing, he stayed at the top (and this was before he was dating/banging/married to Stephanie McMahon).  This is the same reason Chris Masters comes back every so often for another try (and inevitable failure).

Current example: Antonio Cesaro.  Cesaro might be the most boring wrestler on television (Wade Barrett is a close second), but he's a big musclehead so he's given the U.S. title and is on TV every week (interestingly, always jobbing, so I have no idea what the value of the U.S. title is supposed to be - they ought to merge it with the Intercontinental title and make the secondary championship mean something again).
 
2013-03-26 01:46:23 PM

dallylamma: fickenchucker:  REAL QUESTION for WWE fans:

How do they determine the story lines of who wins, who becomes a big star, and who disappears?  Is it based off T-shirt sales or something, and the guy who sells the most shiat gets more time in front of the crowd?

WWE pays real close attention to the quarter hour ratings, so if they find more people tuning in when a specific wrestler is on, that guy will get more air time.

Crowd reation and 'on-line' buzz plays into it too, along with a ton of backstage politics, writers ideas, injuries to other stars...etc...

Ultimately a wrestler has to sell himself to the company, the fans in the arena and the fans at home...and if he can pull that off he gets more screen time.


An addition:

Online buzz about a wrestler usually means Vince will treat them like shiat and purposely destroy them to teach them dirty smarks who's boss.
 
2013-03-26 01:56:06 PM

FirstNationalBastard: dallylamma: fickenchucker:  REAL QUESTION for WWE fans:

How do they determine the story lines of who wins, who becomes a big star, and who disappears?  Is it based off T-shirt sales or something, and the guy who sells the most shiat gets more time in front of the crowd?

WWE pays real close attention to the quarter hour ratings, so if they find more people tuning in when a specific wrestler is on, that guy will get more air time.

Crowd reation and 'on-line' buzz plays into it too, along with a ton of backstage politics, writers ideas, injuries to other stars...etc...

Ultimately a wrestler has to sell himself to the company, the fans in the arena and the fans at home...and if he can pull that off he gets more screen time.

An addition:

Online buzz about a wrestler usually means Vince will treat them like shiat and purposely destroy them to teach them dirty smarks who's boss.


I think that mainly applies to ECW and indies that have made their way up, FNB. If there's negative buzz on a 'company man', in Vince's mind they're still talking, still getting the company name out.

Also, Pop has a lot to do with a wrestler getting a push. DBD would have been a midcarder (and horribly wasted) if the crowd hadn't gotten behind 'Yes! Yes! Yes!' They didn't just get behind it, the crowd was the one that started it.
 
2013-03-26 02:03:29 PM

beerrun: Anus trifecta? In my Fark?
It's more likely than you think.


In your sports fark none the less
 
2013-03-26 02:07:13 PM

RoyFokker'sGhost: FirstNationalBastard: dallylamma: fickenchucker:  REAL QUESTION for WWE fans:

How do they determine the story lines of who wins, who becomes a big star, and who disappears?  Is it based off T-shirt sales or something, and the guy who sells the most shiat gets more time in front of the crowd?

WWE pays real close attention to the quarter hour ratings, so if they find more people tuning in when a specific wrestler is on, that guy will get more air time.

Crowd reation and 'on-line' buzz plays into it too, along with a ton of backstage politics, writers ideas, injuries to other stars...etc...

Ultimately a wrestler has to sell himself to the company, the fans in the arena and the fans at home...and if he can pull that off he gets more screen time.

An addition:

Online buzz about a wrestler usually means Vince will treat them like shiat and purposely destroy them to teach them dirty smarks who's boss.

I think that mainly applies to ECW and indies that have made their way up, FNB. If there's negative buzz on a 'company man', in Vince's mind they're still talking, still getting the company name out.

Also, Pop has a lot to do with a wrestler getting a push. DBD would have been a midcarder (and horribly wasted) if the crowd hadn't gotten behind 'Yes! Yes! Yes!' They didn't just get behind it, the crowd was the one that started it.


Ah, but remember how hard Vince tried to stop it?

Muting the crowd, attempting to turn Bryan into a joke, saddling him Skipper, and basically having a Bischoff-like tantrum until he essentially had to give in and run with it?

And Zack Ryder was wasted, then pulled off TV, and is now back to being a jobber.
 
2013-03-26 03:14:20 PM
FirstNationalBastard:

Also, Pop has a lot to do with a wrestler getting a push. DBD would have been a midcarder (and horribly wasted) if the crowd hadn't gotten behind 'Yes! Yes! Yes!' They didn't just get behind it, the crowd was the one that started it.

Ah, but remember how hard Vince tried to stop it?

Muting the crowd, attempting to turn Bryan into a joke, saddling him Skipper, and basically having a Bischoff-like tantrum until he essentially had to give in and run with it?

And Zack Ryder was wasted, then pulled off TV, and is now back to being a jobber.


And where did DBD get his start?

Indie circuit, Japan, ROH

Thus supporting my supposition that the only time Vince tries to quash wrestlers with online buzz is when they're indie rather than pure company men.
 
2013-03-26 04:07:13 PM

tnpir: Five Tails of Fury: dallylamma: fickenchucker:  REAL QUESTION for WWE fans:

How do they determine the story lines of who wins, who becomes a big star, and who disappears?  Is it based off T-shirt sales or something, and the guy who sells the most shiat gets more time in front of the crowd?

WWE pays real close attention to the quarter hour ratings, so if they find more people tuning in when a specific wrestler is on, that guy will get more air time.

Crowd reation and 'on-line' buzz plays into it too, along with a ton of backstage politics, writers ideas, injuries to other stars...etc...

Ultimately a wrestler has to sell himself to the company, the fans in the arena and the fans at home...and if he can pull that off he gets more screen time.

Case in point: Zack Ryder, who put together his "Z! True Long Island Story" web series when he got pushed off TV for quite some time (he'd been involved in a few things previously, and in fact is a former tag champ with Curt Hawkins, which I just learned); that started a groundswell of support that finally got him back on TV. They run hot and cold on people, though; last night he was part of the Jobber Squad that got crushed by The Shield.

Addendum to this: it is NOT uncommon (in fact, it's all too common) for certain wrestlers to get big pushes because management (read: Vince McMahon) likes their look, especially if they're massively muscled. For his first four years in the company, HHH was far less muscular and significantly more slender than he is now.  He took time off for an injury, come back pushing 280 pounds of solid muscle, and started getting pushed to the moon.  The push has literally continued for the last dozen years; even when HHH was getting nothing but negative heat due to the relentless pushing, he stayed at the top (and this was before he was dating/banging/married to Stephanie McMahon).  This is the same reason Chris Masters comes back every so often for another try (and inevitable failure).

Current examp ...


Claudio is highly entertaining and a GREAT wrestler, biatch at the writing team if you don't like his gimmick. You're talking out of your ass on this one. The man can work with bigs and smalls and sell and deliver on both of them WHILE having that physique they love. It's a rare combination that doesn't come along all that often.
 
2013-03-26 04:21:35 PM

fickenchucker: REAL QUESTION for WWE fans:

How do they determine the story lines of who wins, who becomes a big star, and who disappears?  Is it based off T-shirt sales or something, and the guy who sells the most shiat gets more time in front of the crowd?


There will be no more big stars, only the ones that currently exist. The current goal is to have the talent win and lose equally so that none gain a large following. Then the fans will only tune in for the WWE itself rather than a big star who may try to use his stardom to move on to safer and more profitable endeavors. Not sure what the plan is when John Cena moves on though.
 
2013-03-26 04:31:15 PM

The1andonlyZack: Claudio is highly entertaining and a GREAT wrestler, biatch at the writing team if you don't like his gimmick. You're talking out of your ass on this one. The man can work with bigs and smalls and sell and deliver on both of them WHILE having that physique they love. It's a rare combination that doesn't come along all that often.


Eh, no I'm not. He's a competent wrestler, but his gimmick (such as it is) sucks and he can't make the most of it. Contrast that to Daniel Bryan, who gets saddled with stupid gimmicks yet manages to make them work.
 
182
2013-03-26 04:35:32 PM
rectum?  damn near....aw, fark it.
 
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