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(Business Insider)   Good news: Coffee is good for you. Fark: As long as you're an alcoholic male. Cheers   (businessinsider.com) divider line 81
    More: Interesting, coffee  
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7417 clicks; posted to Main » on 26 Mar 2013 at 4:23 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-03-25 08:46:16 PM  
Seems like a Win-Win.
 
2013-03-25 08:56:20 PM  
Yeah, it may protect the liver... while its burning a frikkin' hole through your stomach.
 
2013-03-25 08:57:43 PM  
And doglover never drank water again.
 
2013-03-25 09:44:09 PM  
Sweet!
 
2013-03-25 09:53:39 PM  
Woohoo, Irish Coffee it is!
 
2013-03-25 11:12:21 PM  
Geez, what about the other 1.3% of Farkers?
 
2013-03-26 12:00:39 AM  
Finally, a health study that supports my lifestyle!
 
2013-03-26 12:50:30 AM  
Considering I drink coffee in the morning to get over the hangover from the night before, I'd say I'm good.
 
2013-03-26 01:00:31 AM  
*two-fisting it*

/penis
 
2013-03-26 01:22:58 AM  
media.tumblr.com
 
2013-03-26 01:28:58 AM  
coffee and booze raised my blood pressure so high that i died of a massive stroke.
 
2013-03-26 02:40:12 AM  

SpikeStrip: coffee and booze raised my blood pressure so high that i died of a massive stroke.


You joke, but that blood pressure spike can kill you. My liver swelled and put pressure on the portal vein, which in turn gave me about a dozen esophageal varices. A few of them decided to pop one night and I almost bled out into my stomach. The last thing I heard in the ambulance was "He's going to code." Then i woke up in the hospital.

Long story short, if you're an alcoholic at the level I was, and still alive, it's because you're really lucky. Coffee ain't gonna help.
 
2013-03-26 02:45:04 AM  

SpikeStrip: coffee and booze raised my blood pressure so high that i died of a massive stroke.


Got better?
 
2013-03-26 04:28:07 AM  
Score!
 
2013-03-26 04:30:56 AM  
I think I'll have myself an Irish Coffee.
 
2013-03-26 04:31:35 AM  
Brilliant!
 
2013-03-26 04:33:48 AM  

ecmoRandomNumbers: SpikeStrip: coffee and booze raised my blood pressure so high that i died of a massive stroke.

You joke, but that blood pressure spike can kill you. My liver swelled and put pressure on the portal vein, which in turn gave me about a dozen esophageal varices. A few of them decided to pop one night and I almost bled out into my stomach. The last thing I heard in the ambulance was "He's going to code." Then i woke up in the hospital.

Long story short, if you're an alcoholic at the level I was, and still alive, it's because you're really lucky. Coffee ain't gonna help.


Have you ever wondered if what you woke up to was the afterlife, and Fark is just an aspect of hell?
 
2013-03-26 04:40:09 AM  
TFA: nothing to see here
 
2013-03-26 04:49:21 AM  
As an alcoholic who hates coffee, this does nothing for me,

/also, randomly, i just found out ashlynn brooke retired and is now selling cars.
 
2013-03-26 05:27:40 AM  
Everything's coming up Milhouse!
 
2013-03-26 05:29:03 AM  
This just made my day!
 
2013-03-26 05:29:49 AM  
As someone who just cracked a beer and will be brewing a strong cup of joe in a few hours  I'm getting a kick..
 
2013-03-26 05:45:56 AM  
This calls for hops, malted barley and yeast coffee.
 
2013-03-26 05:50:16 AM  
i280.photobucket.com
 
2013-03-26 05:53:55 AM  
Great news! Time to celebrate with a cigarette.
 
2013-03-26 06:16:07 AM  

AverageAmericanGuy: I think I'll have myself an Irish Coffee.


Given that we're snowed in pretty damn thoroughly today, I'd say an irish coffee is just what the doctor ordered. Because health.
 
2013-03-26 06:24:13 AM  

ModernLuddite: ecmoRandomNumbers: SpikeStrip: coffee and booze raised my blood pressure so high that i died of a massive stroke.

You joke, but that blood pressure spike can kill you. My liver swelled and put pressure on the portal vein, which in turn gave me about a dozen esophageal varices. A few of them decided to pop one night and I almost bled out into my stomach. The last thing I heard in the ambulance was "He's going to code." Then i woke up in the hospital.

Long story short, if you're an alcoholic at the level I was, and still alive, it's because you're really lucky. Coffee ain't gonna help.

Have you ever wondered if what you woke up to was the afterlife, and Fark is just an aspect of hell?


He's allowed to post in areas other than the Politics tab.  At worst it's Purgatory.
 
2013-03-26 06:43:25 AM  
So my now 45 year-long strategy of drinking coffee all morning, a glass of water in the afternoon and Scotch or Beer all night was brilliant.  In spite of what my parents and ex-wives tried to tell me.
 
JVD
2013-03-26 06:50:23 AM  
So...... continue as normal?
 
2013-03-26 06:55:00 AM  
I'm not an alcoholic - alcoholics go to meetings...

/Mmmm - coffee with kahlua!
 
2013-03-26 06:55:25 AM  
FTA: But among the men who were heavy drinkers, those who also consumed five or more cups of coffee daily showed a 50 percent reduction in GGT compared with men who drank no coffee.

Heavy booze drinkers who also consume more than 5 cups of coffee per day? They must have bladders the size of basketballs.
 
2013-03-26 06:56:00 AM  
Well, this beats those damn AA meetings I was attending!
 
2013-03-26 07:04:21 AM  
Heeeeeeeeerrrre we are, born to be kings, we're the princes of the universe!
 
2013-03-26 07:07:01 AM  
I must not be drinking enough.
 
2013-03-26 07:16:08 AM  
We need further study on this showing the benefits of a bacon diet in conjunction with a heavy coffee and alcohol lifestyle.
 
2013-03-26 07:17:10 AM  

SultanofSchwing: Everything's coming up Mil Maxwell House!


FTFY
 
2013-03-26 07:17:36 AM  

ib_thinkin: SpikeStrip: coffee and booze raised my blood pressure so high that i died of a massive stroke.

Got better?


He only mostly died.
 
2013-03-26 07:18:36 AM  

doglover: And doglover never drank water again.


Never touch the stuff.
Fish function in it.


/stolen
//apologies to WC Fields
 
2013-03-26 07:27:34 AM  
As an atheist, this gives me great pause.

It is almost like there is a god that wants me to be happy...sometimes.
 
2013-03-26 07:30:05 AM  

BunkoSquad: Geez, what about the other 1.3% of Farkers?


(nobody gives a shiat about them)
 
2013-03-26 07:39:24 AM  
So you're saying I should start drinking?
 
2013-03-26 07:54:30 AM  
Well, I guess that explains why I'm not dead yet.
 
2013-03-26 07:57:08 AM  
<b>subby</b>, you posted this on Fark.  Isn't the second sentence redundant?
 
2013-03-26 08:13:46 AM  

robohobo: As an alcoholic who hates coffee, this does nothing for me,

/also, randomly, i just found out ashlynn brooke retired and is now selling cars.


So let's just pile on the buzzkill while we're at it! Geez.

/what dealership?
 
2013-03-26 08:15:36 AM  
Hey, what about me? Just because I don't have a penis coffee isn't magical for me?
 
2013-03-26 08:18:24 AM  

KrispyKritter: This calls for hops, malted barley and yeast coffee.


You want to be a master of karate?

beerstreetjournal.com
 
2013-03-26 08:19:29 AM  

BunkoSquad: Geez, what about the other 1.3% of Farkers?


You think there are that many?
 
2013-03-26 08:20:18 AM  

farkin_noob: Hey, what about me? Just because I don't have a penis coffee isn't magical for me?


So.. you're in need of a penis, are you?
 
2013-03-26 08:21:48 AM  
The researchers found that the way that coffee was prepared - whether it was filtered, boiled or served as espresso, for example - did not seem to make a difference in the findings.

So eating coffee like chew between shots doesn't make it better?
 
2013-03-26 08:22:54 AM  
Just seen this and I have to say "Farkin A!!!"
 
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