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(Fox News)   Shelby announces a 1,200 horsepower Ford Penis Surrogate   (foxnews.com) divider line 109
    More: Interesting, New York Auto Show, horsepower, extra power  
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6379 clicks; posted to Geek » on 24 Mar 2013 at 8:47 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-03-24 08:52:05 AM
Just what the world needs: A 1200 hp grocery cart.
 
2013-03-24 08:55:29 AM
Subby sounds flaccid.
 
2013-03-24 09:01:38 AM
Yup...having a bad-ass car = small penis. Lord knows that there would be absolutley no other reason to enjoy the art and/or mechanical science that goes into such things. People who are well endowed only drive Carollas.
 
2013-03-24 09:03:43 AM
How long before it's test driven on Top Gear (UK version)?
 
2013-03-24 09:04:33 AM

evil rhinobird: How long before it's test driven on Top Gear (UK version)?


Implying anyone actually watches the U.S. version
 
2013-03-24 09:05:52 AM
24.media.tumblr.com
 
2013-03-24 09:06:03 AM
So they finally released the Thundercougarfalconbird?
 
2013-03-24 09:08:53 AM

ScouserDuck: Yup...having a bad-ass car = small penis. Lord knows that there would be absolutley no other reason to enjoy the art and/or mechanical science that goes into such things. People who are well endowed only drive Carollas.


I hated it when my junk got wrapped in the steering wheel on turns, so I switched to a Camery.
 
2013-03-24 09:11:46 AM
The list price is $154,995--on top of the price of the GT500 it's based on. Total price: $209,645.


Not sure if Ford has the branding power to pull this off, but I guess the profit margin means they only need to sell a couple.  Good evaluations from neutral sources like Top Gear (UK) might help.
 
2013-03-24 09:15:35 AM

ScouserDuck: Yup...having a bad-ass car = small penis. Lord knows that there would be absolutley no other reason to enjoy the art and/or mechanical science that goes into such things. People who are well endowed only drive Carollas.


I think the point is having 1,200 HP in a RWD, 1.75 ton car = having a small penis.

/This is not for a person that wants an incredibly fast Mustang.
//This IS for the person with an incredibly small penis.
 
2013-03-24 09:26:06 AM
Since most of these will be bought by rich old douche-bags and driven by trophy wives to the gym, small penises may be involved. Somewhere. One can only hope they pool-boy gets the keys once in a while and uses the car the way it was designed.
 
2013-03-24 09:26:37 AM

digistil: ScouserDuck: Yup...having a bad-ass car = small penis. Lord knows that there would be absolutley no other reason to enjoy the art and/or mechanical science that goes into such things. People who are well endowed only drive Carollas.

I think the point is having 1,200 HP in a RWD, 1.75 ton car = having a small penis.

/This is not for a person that wants an incredibly fast Mustang.
//This IS for the person with an incredibly small penis.


To be fair, a 1200hp Shelby would still be a "penis surrogate" for John Holmes.

born_yesterday: The list price is $154,995--on top of the price of the GT500 it's based on. Total price: $209,645.


Not sure if Ford has the branding power to pull this off, but I guess the profit margin means they only need to sell a couple.  Good evaluations from neutral sources like Top Gear (UK) might help.


Ford may not have the branding power for that, but Shelby does. Carroll Shelby is proof you CAN polish a turd and make it gold.
 
2013-03-24 09:32:32 AM
almost 200 hp/liter.   Very respectable for a large displacement engine.   Unfortunately, for that price you can get a base model Ferrari AND a real drag race car for the weekend.
 
2013-03-24 09:36:43 AM
Subby sounds like a road bike rider who wears spandex and crushes is impotent junk into a bike seat and has to massage his prostate in order to cum to pictures of Lance Armstrong.

On to the car, pretty badass but way over priced. I used to have a twin turbo 03 Cobra with 967rwhp, and I built it for only $40,000 including the price of the used Cobra.

I'm sure there will a few sold to Dubai and other oil wealthy countries.
 
2013-03-24 09:36:56 AM

born_yesterday: The list price is $154,995--on top of the price of the GT500 it's based on. Total price: $209,645.


Not sure if Ford has the branding power to pull this off, but I guess the profit margin means they only need to sell a couple.  Good evaluations from neutral sources like Top Gear (UK) might help.



Some footballer with more money than sense will buy this but at the end of the day its still a Ford Mustang. The same body as all those other v6 versions and the same crappy, cheap interior. When you spend $200k on a Bentley or Ferrari you get a car that feels like its worth that much money both inside and out.

Top Gear did a cross Europe challenge with a stock Mustang and Clarkson said that while the car is super cheap it was exhausting in a way that the Astons, Ferrari's or Bugatti's weren't. The difference was like flying coach vs first class
 
2013-03-24 09:38:14 AM
I LOL'ed.
 
2013-03-24 09:47:05 AM

Norfolking Chance: born_yesterday: The list price is $154,995--on top of the price of the GT500 it's based on. Total price: $209,645.


Not sure if Ford has the branding power to pull this off, but I guess the profit margin means they only need to sell a couple.  Good evaluations from neutral sources like Top Gear (UK) might help.


Some footballer with more money than sense will buy this but at the end of the day its still a Ford Mustang. The same body as all those other v6 versions and the same crappy, cheap interior. When you spend $200k on a Bentley or Ferrari you get a car that feels like its worth that much money both inside and out.

Top Gear did a cross Europe challenge with a stock Mustang and Clarkson said that while the car is super cheap it was exhausting in a way that the Astons, Ferrari's or Bugatti's weren't. The difference was like flying coach vs first class


But it's not the same interior. Shelby AND Roush both custom their interiors. Much nicer leather and dash trims. On top of the suspension and other performance tech is worked on. It's far from being a stock mustang that just goes faster.
 
2013-03-24 09:49:28 AM

Norfolking Chance: born_yesterday: The list price is $154,995--on top of the price of the GT500 it's based on. Total price: $209,645.


Not sure if Ford has the branding power to pull this off, but I guess the profit margin means they only need to sell a couple.  Good evaluations from neutral sources like Top Gear (UK) might help.


Some footballer with more money than sense will buy this but at the end of the day its still a Ford Mustang. The same body as all those other v6 versions and the same crappy, cheap interior. When you spend $200k on a Bentley or Ferrari you get a car that feels like its worth that much money both inside and out.

Top Gear did a cross Europe challenge with a stock Mustang and Clarkson said that while the car is super cheap it was exhausting in a way that the Astons, Ferrari's or Bugatti's weren't. The difference was like flying coach vs first class


Surprise surprise, a Euro show backs the Euro cars.

I've driven from Maryland to Memphis, TN (14 hours, give or take) several times in my 05 GT convertible and never once the car was tiring or exhausting.  It's so comfortable that the only time I didn't make it all in one go was the very first time I was driving to Maryland, it was late, and the apartment office where I was moving in was closed so I decided to just stop for the night and finish in the morning.  And the talk about cheap interiors is just stupid...what do you want, wood paneling cut from trees in an endangered rain forest?  How would that make the ride any more comfortable?
 
2013-03-24 09:49:36 AM
Not to put too fine a point on it, but short of having some serious super wide rear wheels, like Lamborghini Aventador wide, there's no way to get much of that power to the ground. And from the picture, those aren't particularly wide rear tires, which would be hard to get on a Mustang without redoing the rear wheel tubs, which would mean reworking the entire rear suspension and other fun issues. Of course given the price, you'd expect them to take care of such things. As it is for the price you can get an Audi R8 AND a Nissan GTR, or at most for a couple grand more than the Mustang. Or get a Ferrari.
 
2013-03-24 09:51:06 AM

StrangeQ: Surprise surprise, a Euro show backs the Euro cars.


they've had nice things to say about American cars when they've earned it, and they've trashed plenty of European cars.
 
2013-03-24 09:52:26 AM
I really have to stop compensating for my huge dick with my with shiatty car.
 
2013-03-24 09:53:43 AM
Why do we still measure automotive power in "horsepower" anyway?  What farking year is this, 1877?  What relevance do horses have to anything?

Just use watts and kilowatts.
 
2013-03-24 09:56:00 AM
As a gearhead I appreciate the art of the automobile. I like the effort to build faster, quicker, more agile automobiles. I look forward to what Ferrari has to offer. I like to see how wild the next Lamborghini flagship V-12. I look forward to Hennesy and Shelby tuned cars. I like fast cars and I like to drive them quickly. I never thought of them as compensation devices. Most people don't know about cars and don't know that that Mustang is special just by looking at it.

But to each their own. I just think you are way to interested in my penis. (NTTIAWWT)
 
2013-03-24 10:09:00 AM
If I only had to trade my massive penis for a small one to have (and feed) this car.....SOLD.
 
2013-03-24 10:13:24 AM
Neat. I dropped twin turbos in my 5.0; usually keep the boost at 6 PSI for my daily driving which is about 650 HP.
 
2013-03-24 10:19:20 AM
Doc Daneeka: Why do we still measure automotive power in "horsepower" anyway?  What farking year is this, 1877?  What relevance do horses have to anything?

Just use watts and kilowatts.


What year is this 1899? Why are you wanting to use electricity to measure something that isn't electric, do you jerk off to pics of Nikola Tesla or something?
 
2013-03-24 10:24:18 AM
It's not my fault I have a small penis.
 
2013-03-24 10:27:32 AM

styckx: evil rhinobird: How long before it's test driven on Top Gear (UK version)?

Implying anyone actually watches the U.S. version


I still watch the US version, even like it. But they pretty much gave up on the studio stuff to concentrate on the field challenges for about a season no. Granted, their studio stuff was much weaker, but that means they really don't do any new car testing or power laps and almost no Stig appearances at all.

born_yesterday: The list price is $154,995--on top of the price of the GT500 it's based on. Total price: $209,645.


Not sure if Ford has the branding power to pull this off, but I guess the profit margin means they only need to sell a couple.  Good evaluations from neutral sources like Top Gear (UK) might help.


As much as I love the show, the UK Top Gear is most certainly not a neutral source.

WhyteRaven74: StrangeQ: Surprise surprise, a Euro show backs the Euro cars.

they've had nice things to say about American cars when they've earned it, and they've trashed plenty of European cars.


They trash Japanese cars quite a bit, too. I've noticed that over the years, as the show has become more and more popular in the U.S, they've toned down their attacks a bit and do more and more stories over here. But they'll still always go Euro when given the chance. I also think last week's US Top Gear show about luxery SUVs was a good example of American Top Gear still very much being a BBC program. The episode could easily be considered a long Range Rover commercial.

ScouserDuck: Norfolking Chance: born_yesterday: The list price is $154,995--on top of the price of the GT500 it's based on. Total price: $209,645.


Not sure if Ford has the branding power to pull this off, but I guess the profit margin means they only need to sell a couple.  Good evaluations from neutral sources like Top Gear (UK) might help.


Some footballer with more money than sense will buy this but at the end of the day its still a Ford Mustang. The same body as all those other v6 versions and the same crappy, cheap interior. When you spend $200k on a Bentley or Ferrari you get a car that feels like its worth that much money both inside and out.

Top Gear did a cross Europe challenge with a stock Mustang and Clarkson said that while the car is super cheap it was exhausting in a way that the Astons, Ferrari's or Bugatti's weren't. The difference was like flying coach vs first class

But it's not the same interior. Shelby AND Roush both custom their interiors. Much nicer leather and dash trims. On top of the suspension and other performance tech is worked on. It's far from being a stock mustang that just goes faster.


The Mustang Clarkson drove was a Shelby model, he even paid tribute to Carrol Shelby during the show. The producers' challenge was to spend no more than thirty five thousand pounds on the car and I'm guessing there's nothing in that price range with near the power that Mustang had. James May agreed with him about the ride of American cars, even brought up the Viper Hammond drove the week before. Having never driven a Viper or Astin Martin, I don't know if one is that much more comfortable than the other. Maybe, maybe not. I think it's just what they're used to. The Mercedes SLR (IIRC) that Clarkson drove around the east coast and across northern Europe is always called "the big Merc", but I saw one in a parking lot recently it and it wasn't big at all. Now, I'm not comparing to some giant SUV or lifted truck, this "big Merc" didn't appear any larger than my Carolla. And Clarkson is a big dude, too.
 
2013-03-24 10:33:58 AM
Considering that last year's model couldn't get traction for shiat, I'm sure throwing another few hundred horsepower will correct the situation.


Besides, I'm sure it'll only be people who know how to drive with that much power who purchase this car.  I'm sure they have been well trained in how to drive vehicles of this caliber by the time they get behind the wheel.
 
kab
2013-03-24 10:38:24 AM
And it will still be outperformed by cars with less hp.

digistil: /This is not for a person that wants an incredibly fast Mustang.
//This IS for the person with an incredibly small penis.


You realize how dumb that sounds, right?
 
2013-03-24 10:45:59 AM

kab: digistil: /This is not for a person that wants an incredibly fast Mustang.
//This IS for the person with an incredibly small penis.

You realize how dumb that sounds, right?


Enlighten me why it's dumb, good sir.
 
2013-03-24 10:53:20 AM
encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com

This is where mechanical excellence and one-thousand four-hundred horsepower pays off.
 
2013-03-24 11:03:41 AM
Dang, for that kind of money you could restore several classic Mustangs. I like the '73 Mach 1...
 
2013-03-24 11:08:13 AM
I drive a Miata.

Gobs of torque and HP under your right foot means you don't have to learn how to drive to go fast.
Prefers cornering to drag racing.  Pity I live in Indiana.
 
2013-03-24 11:15:04 AM
How long until we hear about someone with more money than ability taking one of these into a Florida swamp or a telephone pole.  Too many buyers will focus on the superlative of most horsepower and never ask themselves if they can handle that poser.
 
2013-03-24 11:20:22 AM
Cheron: How long until we hear about someone with more money than ability taking one of these into a Florida swamp or a telephone pole.  Too many buyers will focus on the superlative of most horsepower and never ask themselves if they can handle that poser.

Speaking of all the power in the world but no ability to handle it, remember the old Kawasaki triples? 750cc 2 stroke.

Basically picture a cafe bike with a not paticularly good suspension and manual cable operated drum brakes with a engine that is like huyabusa quick. There was a good damned reason it had the nickname the widowmaker.
 
2013-03-24 11:27:58 AM
It looks like a mustang that had sex with camero.
 
2013-03-24 11:34:00 AM
How big was the penis of the guy who came up with all this penis surrogate stuff?
 
2013-03-24 11:57:47 AM
Wow, so sad what's happening to men these days.  Instead of drooling over a 1200hp pony car, we're taking about penis size.
 
2013-03-24 12:03:52 PM

Your_Huckleberry: They trash Japanese cars quite a bit, too. I've noticed that over the years, as the show has become more and more popular in the U.S, they've toned down their attacks a bit and do more and more stories over here. But they'll still always go Euro when given the chance. I also think last week's US Top Gear show about luxery SUVs was a good example of American Top Gear still very much being a BBC program. The episode could easily be considered a long Range Rover commercial.


Ive noticed this too.  Clarkson would trash something American on (what seemed like) damn near every episode, even if it was just an American that happened to be in the audience.  It put me off the show because it wasnt very objective even if they did trash a Euro car once in a blue moon.  Not that the show was designed to be objective, but I expected more from the BBC back in those days.
 
2013-03-24 12:06:19 PM
Meh. Just bang women under 4'8"
 
2013-03-24 12:09:01 PM
s2s2s2: How big was the penis of the guy who came up with all this penis surrogate stuff?

My theory is that the guy who decided to accuse people who have nice stuff of having small penises had an even smaller penis.
 
2013-03-24 12:13:02 PM
Micropenis or not, anyone who buys one of these is insecure about something.

What's the point of 1,200HP?  It's mostly so you can tell other people about it.

For a long time, I drove an old Escort with 88HP.  It was enough.  It got 42MPG and gas was under $1.  I went freaking everywhere on road trips.  Another 1,100HP wouldn't have made it better.
 
2013-03-24 12:23:39 PM
L.D. Ablo: Micropenis or not, anyone who buys one of these is insecure about something.

What's the point of 1,200HP?  It's mostly so you can tell other people about it.

For a long time, I drove an old Escort with 88HP.  It was enough.  It got 42MPG and gas was under $1.  I went freaking everywhere on road trips.  Another 1,100HP wouldn't have made it better.


As someone who is a speed freak but not penis compensator type I'd rather have something like your plain unassuming escort with that mustangs 1200 HP engine shoe horned in it (fast but not flashy looking) than a V6 mustang that is slow but looks cool.
 
2013-03-24 12:23:40 PM
born_yesterday: The list price is $154,995--on top of the price of the GT500 it's based on. Total price: $209,645.

So...enough to buy one of these, and still have $50,000 left to burn?

upload.wikimedia.org

/ I would give a nut to have one of these
 
2013-03-24 12:27:08 PM

ScouserDuck: Norfolking Chance: born_yesterday: The list price is $154,995--on top of the price of the GT500 it's based on. Total price: $209,645.


Not sure if Ford has the branding power to pull this off, but I guess the profit margin means they only need to sell a couple.  Good evaluations from neutral sources like Top Gear (UK) might help.


Some footballer with more money than sense will buy this but at the end of the day its still a Ford Mustang. The same body as all those other v6 versions and the same crappy, cheap interior. When you spend $200k on a Bentley or Ferrari you get a car that feels like its worth that much money both inside and out.

Top Gear did a cross Europe challenge with a stock Mustang and Clarkson said that while the car is super cheap it was exhausting in a way that the Astons, Ferrari's or Bugatti's weren't. The difference was like flying coach vs first class

But it's not the same interior. Shelby AND Roush both custom their interiors. Much nicer leather and dash trims. On top of the suspension and other performance tech is worked on. It's far from being a stock mustang that just goes faster.


Why don't they just make their own car, if the whole point of it is that the only mustang thing left us the body shape? Why associate the quality you're trying to project with an outdated muscle car?
 
2013-03-24 12:35:06 PM

WhyteRaven74: Not to put too fine a point on it, but short of having some serious super wide rear wheels, like Lamborghini Aventador wide, there's no way to get much of that power to the ground. And from the picture, those aren't particularly wide rear tires, which would be hard to get on a Mustang without redoing the rear wheel tubs, which would mean reworking the entire rear suspension and other fun issues. Of course given the price, you'd expect them to take care of such things. As it is for the price you can get an Audi R8 AND a Nissan GTR, or at most for a couple grand more than the Mustang. Or get a Ferrari.


Yup, you're getting 1200 hp you'll never actually use, and if you somehow were able to put that power to the ground, I doubt it would be that safe.

The reason why it's a tiny penis mobile isn't the 1200 hp. It's that it's 1200 hp with a mustang badge on a body that will fall apart at 180 mph. I doubt that engine will not overheat if you max it out on a test track. The Veyron has something like 10 radiators to keep all sorts if things running while the car is wide open with all 1000 horses going wild. This thing still has a stock mustang body without any consideration for how air will flow to engine, brakes, etc.
 
2013-03-24 12:44:10 PM

whistleridge: born_yesterday: The list price is $154,995--on top of the price of the GT500 it's based on. Total price: $209,645.

So...enough to buy one of these, and still have $50,000 left to burn?

[upload.wikimedia.org image 850x637]

/ I would give a nut to have one of these


You might have better luck if you offer something in higher demand.

/sorry. It was there.
 
2013-03-24 12:47:31 PM
So it should be able to go 200mph in a straight line. But like every other mustang, anything over 25mph on a moderate to tight bend and you've just invalidated your life insurance policy.
 
2013-03-24 12:49:39 PM

s2s2s2: How big was the penis of the guy who came up with all this penis surrogate stuff?


You just had to ask, didn't you?
 
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