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(National Post)   Inventor of Cheez Whiz shocked to find out that it no longer contains cheese, because we all expect nutritious, wholesome ingredients in a product that spells cheese with a zed   (fullcomment.nationalpost.com) divider line 112
    More: Obvious, Cheez Whiz, cream cheese, food science, Winn-Dixie, previous lives, ingredients, Kiwanis Club, consumer complaint  
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7494 clicks; posted to Main » on 23 Mar 2013 at 2:44 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-03-22 10:52:16 PM
Ooh good one subby, that oughta rustle a few jimmies.
 
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2013-03-22 10:58:24 PM
Americans now eat as much as 33 pounds or more of cheese and pseudo-cheese products a year

I eat more than that but it's genuine cheese, mostly cheddar, rather than cheez.

During that same time, beverage makers managed only to double the per capita consumption of carbonated soft drinks to 50 gallons a year

That's only 16-20 ounces per day.
 
2013-03-22 10:58:32 PM
Go back to the commonwealth, subby.
 
2013-03-22 11:03:54 PM
Wow. That was actually pretty damn interesting.

However, as subby points out, it should be obvious to anyone that Cheez Whiz is an edible chemical bath and not actually cheese.
 
2013-03-22 11:05:37 PM
Do people who incorrectly pronounce the letter Z as "zed" spell it out like that? I thought they would still just use Z, but add some extra letters in there when they speak.

So I think I'm kind of accusing the submitter of not actually actually doing what the headline implies he does (pronouncing z as zed) just so that he could troll, but on the other hand I am talking about that instead of the linked article. So there's that.
 
2013-03-22 11:35:27 PM

Rev.K: Wow. That was actually pretty damn interesting.

However, as subby points out, it should be obvious to anyone that Cheez Whiz is an edible chemical bath and not actually cheese.


I was under the impression it was failed Silly Putty myself
 
2013-03-22 11:58:04 PM
The triumph of zee over zed is inevitable. It's been 200 years, and the commonwealth nations haven't been able to come up with an alphabet song that rhymes with "zed."

In other words, zed's dead, baby. Zed's dead.
 
2013-03-23 12:18:51 AM

Joelogon: The triumph of zee over zed is inevitable. It's been 200 years, and the commonwealth nations haven't been able to come up with an alphabet song that rhymes with "zed."

In other words, zed's dead, baby. Zed's dead.


But the embarrassment of that outfit will live forever
i.telegraph.co.uk
 
2013-03-23 12:19:08 AM

sevente: Ooh good one subby, that oughta rustle a few jimmies.


Just a few.

AND DON'T GET ME STARTED ON THE EXTRA VOWELS THE CANUCKS/LIMES SEEM INSISTENT TO USE IN WORDS
 
2013-03-23 12:27:44 AM
I find fake cheese particularly nauseating. I can't even eat American cheese.
 
2013-03-23 01:54:13 AM
rlv.zcache.com

/hotlink
//"Cheez Whiz is neither cheese nor whiz"
///but it's closer to whiz
 
2013-03-23 02:46:09 AM
Same newstory as the fat farkers who buy Cheeto's at Wal-mart and discovery its not "real" cheese, but sprayed on, factory imitation cheese

/enjoy rotting in the ground fat asses.
 
2013-03-23 02:48:07 AM
I'm surprised there was ever any cheese in Cheez Whiz.
 
2013-03-23 02:48:31 AM

Rev.K: Wow. That was actually pretty damn interesting.

However, as subby points out, it should be obvious to anyone that Cheez Whiz is an edible chemical bath and not actually cheese.


Cheez Whiz is watery, goopy Silly String without the flavor.
 
2013-03-23 02:51:15 AM
I always just assumed it was bull ejaculate...
 
2013-03-23 02:51:20 AM

AverageAmericanGuy: I'm surprised there was ever any cheese in Cheez Whiz.


I wouldn't be surprised to find out there was once whiz in it, also
 
2013-03-23 02:52:16 AM

kxs401: I find fake cheese particularly nauseating. I can't even eat American cheese.


Yeah, I liked American cheese as a kid, but now it doesn't even taste like cheese to me.
 
2013-03-23 02:53:05 AM
OOOO! Zed! Zed.

img380.imageshack.us

Excuse me, for I'm off to go play the Grahnd Pee-Ayn-Noe!

What's next, Subbo? Telling us that pop should only be called "soda"?
 
2013-03-23 02:53:50 AM

TheJoe03: kxs401: I find fake cheese particularly nauseating. I can't even eat American cheese.

Yeah, I liked American cheese as a kid, but now it doesn't even taste like cheese to me.


That's what makes it American.
 
2013-03-23 02:54:48 AM

SpdrJay: I always just assumed it was bull ejaculate...


You assumed, therefore, you farked up......
 
2013-03-23 02:55:17 AM
24.media.tumblr.com

cheese anything isn't exactly health food
 
2013-03-23 02:55:52 AM

Spanky_McFarksalot: [24.media.tumblr.com image 500x601]

cheese anything isn't exactly health food


He's probably on the Atkins Diet.
 
2013-03-23 02:56:31 AM

TV's Vinnie: OOOO! Zed! Zed.


2.bp.blogspot.com

Zed's dead, baby. Zed's dead.
 
2013-03-23 02:56:46 AM

AverageAmericanGuy: He's probably on the Atkins Diet.


I think its a chick.

I think...
 
2013-03-23 02:59:03 AM
images.eurogamer.net  static3.businessinsider.com

Approves of this spelling.
 
2013-03-23 02:59:43 AM
"I was on a bus once, it was in the middle of the night, and I had a box of crackers and a can of Easy Cheese. It was dark, and it was a surprise how much cheese I had applied on each cracker. That's why they should have a glow-in-the-dark version of Easy Cheese. It's not like the product has any integrity to begin with. If you buy a room-temperature cheese that you squeeze out of a can, you probably won't get mad because it glows in the dark too."
 
2013-03-23 02:59:46 AM
FTA: Real cheese gave it class and legitimacy, Southworth said, not to mention flavor.

www.fatwallet.com
 
2013-03-23 03:04:28 AM
Wouldn't it be delightful if the people invented a dumbed down product like cheeze whiz were as a direct result some of the most accomplished people on earth at preparing Welsh Rarebit? I mean, that was the food they worked on for years to imitate.
 
2013-03-23 03:06:34 AM
got my cheese whiz, boy?
 
2013-03-23 03:08:40 AM

Rev.K: Cheez Whiz is an edible chemical bath and not actually cheese.


True, but as the best fish bait ever invented, I am not going to complain if it keeps working that well.
 
2013-03-23 03:11:38 AM

TheOmni: Do people who incorrectly pronounce the letter Z as "zed" spell it out like that? I thought they would still just use Z, but add some extra letters in there when they speak.

So I think I'm kind of accusing the submitter of not actually actually doing what the headline implies he does (pronouncing z as zed) just so that he could troll, but on the other hand I am talking about that instead of the linked article. So there's that.


Incorrectly? 330 million Americans with 'Zee' compared to like... a billion and 'Zed'?

If in the states, I'll say Zee, outside the states, don't disrespect the Zed.

/We're big Zed Zed Top fans too.
 
2013-03-23 03:16:42 AM

Danger Avoid Death: That's what makes it American.


True, it sucks the cheese we are known for is processed and fake. I know there's some good cheese that's made in America, so hopefully one day good cheese will become a trend here (like beer and wine have both blown up in America in the last 20 years). I love cheese, the fact that vegans don't each cheese might be my biggest beef with them
 
2013-03-23 03:17:53 AM
Acharne:Zed Zed Top

That's just crazy talk.
 
2013-03-23 03:19:52 AM

Omahawg: got my cheese whiz, boy?


farm6.static.flickr.com
 
2013-03-23 03:21:37 AM

TheJoe03: like beer and wine have both blown up in America in the last 20 years


That always happens when I leave them in the trunk on a hot day.
 
2013-03-23 03:22:58 AM

Acharne: TheOmni: Do people who incorrectly pronounce the letter Z as "zed" spell it out like that? I thought they would still just use Z, but add some extra letters in there when they speak.

So I think I'm kind of accusing the submitter of not actually actually doing what the headline implies he does (pronouncing z as zed) just so that he could troll, but on the other hand I am talking about that instead of the linked article. So there's that.

Incorrectly? 330 million Americans with 'Zee' compared to like... a billion and 'Zed'?

If in the states, I'll say Zee, outside the states, don't disrespect the Zed.

/We're big Zed Zed Top fans too.


Coincidentally, I wish they would put that British cop show, Zee Cars, out on DVD.
 
2013-03-23 03:24:36 AM
Look, "cheese food" is a perfectly cromulent dietary, er...substance. Comestible.
 
2013-03-23 03:26:17 AM

Nicely written piece.  Engaging.


Squeeze Cheese was the entre to my life's heartbreak. I shared that with his crackers on a long flight on a military jet -"magic happened" and we had a doomed romance the following years. Damn the squeeze cheese, and I will never engage a Gemini man.


Whoa.  I just read the above.  I  normally  make sense. Not in this case.

 
2013-03-23 03:27:16 AM
Spanky_McFarksalot:
[24.media.tumblr.com image 500x601]

cheese anything isn't exactly health food


I... she...  how does someone get to the point where they just sit there eating a kilogram sized block of cheese right out of the wrapper in public?
 
2013-03-23 03:28:46 AM

1ceTr0n: Same newstory as the fat farkers who buy Cheeto's at Wal-mart and discovery its not "real" cheese, but sprayed on, factory imitation cheese

/enjoy rotting in the ground fat asses.


Enjoy eternal life as an Undead, Spanky McEatsWell
 
2013-03-23 03:42:26 AM
If ya want cheese, eat the real thing.  if you want whiz, well, you get what you pay for....
 
2013-03-23 03:44:58 AM
Popcorn, Cheese Whiz, and peanut butter. They just can't get enough of it.
 
2013-03-23 03:46:26 AM

freetomato: Nicely written piece.  Engaging.
Squeeze Cheese was the entre to my life's heartbreak. I shared that with his crackers on a long flight on a military jet -"magic happened" and we had a doomed romance the following years. Damn the squeeze cheese, and I will never engage a Gemini man.
Whoa.  I just read the above.  I  normally  make sense. Not in this case.


Too much squeeze on the cheese.
 
2013-03-23 03:47:20 AM

Calm: Wouldn't it be delightful if the people invented a dumbed down product like cheeze whiz were as a direct result some of the most accomplished people on earth at preparing Welsh Rarebit? I mean, that was the food they worked on for years to imitate.


Is it weird that I like Welsh Rarebit?  At least when my grandmother makes it...
 
2013-03-23 03:50:08 AM

1ceTr0n: Same newstory as the fat farkers who buy Cheeto's at Wal-mart and discovery its not "real" cheese, but sprayed on, factory imitation cheese

/enjoy rotting in the ground fat asses.


Rotting

with the level of Preservatives in junk food they are going to out last you for awhile
 
2013-03-23 03:50:11 AM

1ceTr0n: Same newstory as the fat farkers who buy Cheeto's at Wal-mart and discovery its not "real" cheese, but sprayed on, factory imitation cheese

/enjoy rotting in the ground fat asses.


You like to play it fast and loose with your apostrophes, I see. That'll put as many Farkers into early graves as the fake cheese will.
 
2013-03-23 03:50:14 AM

RatMaster999: Calm: Wouldn't it be delightful if the people invented a dumbed down product like cheeze whiz were as a direct result some of the most accomplished people on earth at preparing Welsh Rarebit? I mean, that was the food they worked on for years to imitate.

Is it weird that I like Welsh Rarebit?  At least when my grandmother makes it...


There's only one way to eat a brace of coneys.

/Wait, you mean there's no rabbit in it?
//Damned Looney Toons.
 
2013-03-23 03:59:34 AM
Hey, come on now! It's cheez whiz! Even when it was 99% cheese, it was still 1% whiz.

It appears it's now more along the lines of 60% cheese, 30% whiz, 10% unknown.
 
2013-03-23 04:01:45 AM
When I was younger it listed that it contained anchovies, which is why I didn't eat it (vegetarian). It looks like they now don't list it, but they do list natural flavors, so it may still be in there.

Gross stuff.
 
2013-03-23 04:03:24 AM
You don't need to analyse Cheez Whiz to realise it harbours bad vapours and a fake lustre. I take offence to the colour and odour, it sticks in my moustache and it makes me go to the washroom. I'm just glad I lost my licence because you have to plough through several kilometres on foot before all those calories are cancelled out. Savour the flavour if you want, in my defence I'll just eat a doughnut and a bag of milk instead. Go ahead and be sceptical, if my arteries crystallise or I get a tumour we always have universal health care. Cheque please.
 
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