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(NJ.com)   7-Eleven considering replacing front door with garage door   ( nj.com) divider line
    More: Scary, somerville, Somerset County  
•       •       •

7970 clicks; posted to Main » on 22 Mar 2013 at 1:22 AM (4 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



50 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2013-03-21 07:43:54 PM  
5 cigarettes please

not the box

just the 5 cigarettes
 
2013-03-21 07:53:46 PM  
So somebody can put gum in the locks?

/not even supposed to work today
 
2013-03-21 08:15:20 PM  
You could hear a big gulp from the witnesses.

HEY-OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
 
2013-03-21 08:17:19 PM  
Also, from the article:

This marks the sixth time a car has driven into the same building, according to the store's manager

...



Batel said he's been in the store every time a car has driven into the location."It just keeps happening," he said.


I'm torn as to whether or not to go to his store and ask him to pick the winning lotto numbers.
 
2013-03-21 08:38:06 PM  
He knows he needs some of these, but corporate seems to disagree.

jinminzhou.com
 
2013-03-21 08:46:57 PM  
As someone who ran into a 7 eleven when I was eleven (on a bicycle), I'm getting a kick.
 
2013-03-21 09:18:49 PM  
FTFA: "This marks the sixth time a car has driven into the same building, according to the store's manager, who says thousands of dollars have been spent making repairs over the years. "

Half-a-dozen steel pipes filled with cement: much less than "thousands of dollars".
 
2013-03-21 10:23:53 PM  
i45.tinypic.com
 
2013-03-21 11:29:12 PM  
Batel said he's been in the store every time a car has driven into the location."It just keeps happening," he said.

It's a message from Darwin.
 
2013-03-22 12:19:30 AM  

I hope they remember the sign



ch2289.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-03-22 01:24:43 AM  
if 7-11 is open 24 hrs, why do they have locks on the doors?
 
2013-03-22 01:27:00 AM  
www.wtop.com
At least he used the front door


/pic is not FTFA
 
2013-03-22 01:34:54 AM  
Recalculating...
 
2013-03-22 01:36:40 AM  
Big Gulps huh? Well... See you later!
 
2013-03-22 01:39:36 AM  
Batel said he thinks cars keep crashing at his location because the store does not have any yellow poles out front separating the parking lot from the building.


Uh.... So install some yellow poles?
 
2013-03-22 01:41:34 AM  

thisiszombocom: if 7-11 is open 24 hrs, why do they have locks on the doors?


Sometimes solitary night shift guys need to poop. Or smoke in the back, or masturbate, or write off some "broken" beer bottles. Or all at once.
 
2013-03-22 01:44:51 AM  
So is 7-11 the new farmers market?
 
2013-03-22 01:47:31 AM  

BarkingUnicorn: He knows he needs some of these, but corporate seems to disagree.

[jinminzhou.com image 800x727]


I am just guessing, but it might be because suppliers, especially soft drink and beer truck drivers want to be able to dolly in big loads of product and the poles would get in the way.  The poles might also cut down the availability of one or two parking spaces out front.
 
2013-03-22 01:49:48 AM  

thisiszombocom: if 7-11 is open 24 hrs, why do they have locks on the doors?


In case of a robbery or other emergency the building can be secured.

/First thing to do after a robbery? lock the doors when the asshat leaves
 
2013-03-22 01:50:17 AM  

Aulus: BarkingUnicorn: He knows he needs some of these, but corporate seems to disagree.

[jinminzhou.com image 800x727]

I am just guessing, but it might be because suppliers, especially soft drink and beer truck drivers want to be able to dolly in big loads of product and the poles would get in the way.  The poles might also cut down the availability of one or two parking spaces out front.


Works OK for Plaid Pantry:

i50.tinypic.com

Of course there are none in front of the door.
 
2013-03-22 01:50:52 AM  
"Thank you, come again!"
 
2013-03-22 01:53:59 AM  

fusillade762: Aulus: BarkingUnicorn: He knows he needs some of these, but corporate seems to disagree.

[jinminzhou.com image 800x727]

I am just guessing, but it might be because suppliers, especially soft drink and beer truck drivers want to be able to dolly in big loads of product and the poles would get in the way.  The poles might also cut down the availability of one or two parking spaces out front.

Works OK for Plaid Pantry:

[i50.tinypic.com image 842x505]

Of course there are none in front of the door.


Is that a real thing? It's not nearly as plaid as I had hoped.
 
2013-03-22 02:01:54 AM  

fusillade762: Aulus: BarkingUnicorn: He knows he needs some of these, but corporate seems to disagree.

[jinminzhou.com image 800x727]

I am just guessing, but it might be because suppliers, especially soft drink and beer truck drivers want to be able to dolly in big loads of product and the poles would get in the way.  The poles might also cut down the availability of one or two parking spaces out front.

Works OK for Plaid Pantry:

[i50.tinypic.com image 842x505]

Of course there are none in front of the door.


Yeah, but look at the photo in the story.  The sidewalk between the store and the parking is about half as wide as the one in your photo of The Plaid Pantry.  The big dollies the beer and pop truck drivers use would not have enough room to maneuver.  They'd have to widen the sidewalk  or put the poles more out into the parking area.
 
2013-03-22 02:03:16 AM  
Batel said he thinks cars keep crashing at his location because the store does not have any yellow poles out front separating the parking lot from the building.You know, the grocery store I work at doesn't have yellow poles like that, and we've only had one vehicle hit the building in the six and a half years I've worked there...
 
2013-03-22 02:04:13 AM  
Dammit, Fark, I hit enter twice!  Whar line break, whar?
 
2013-03-22 02:05:34 AM  

farkingismybusiness: Big Gulps huh? All right! Well... See you later!

 
2013-03-22 02:12:23 AM  
The driver saw that sign above the door ... the one that reads "Go Go Go".
 
2013-03-22 02:13:24 AM  
3.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-03-22 02:27:03 AM  

Abacus9: farkingismybusiness: Big Gulps huh? All right! Well... See you later!


chelsea.theoffside.com
I was WAY off.
 
2013-03-22 02:32:08 AM  
Maybe corporate will take this as a hint that we want DRIVE THRU service already....

/Otherwise... we'll drive a 7th car in there....
 
2013-03-22 02:35:25 AM  

farkingismybusiness: Abacus9: farkingismybusiness: Big Gulps huh? All right! Well... See you later!

[chelsea.theoffside.com image 266x199]
I was WAY off.


Sorry, didn't mean to harsh you out. You got the spirit of the quote right.
 
2013-03-22 02:43:33 AM  

thisiszombocom: if 7-11 is open 24 hrs, why do they have locks on the doors?


To keep morons out when the power goes out.

"Let's see, the power's been out for an hour so, no, the coffee's not still hot."

And is it just the northeast, or does this happen disproportionally at 7-Elevens?  I don't see a lot of articles of people driving into CVS or Papa John's.  It's always 7-11.

/No you can't come in and taste it to be sure.
 
2013-03-22 02:49:27 AM  

Abacus9: farkingismybusiness: Abacus9: farkingismybusiness: Big Gulps huh? All right! Well... See you later!

[chelsea.theoffside.com image 266x199]
I was WAY off.

Sorry, didn't mean to harsh you out. You got the spirit of the quote right.


Yeah. You corrected me. Gave me a bunch of crap about me not listening to you, or something. I don't know, I wasn't really paying attention.
 
2013-03-22 02:49:43 AM  

No Line For Beer: thisiszombocom: if 7-11 is open 24 hrs, why do they have locks on the doors?

To keep morons out when the power goes out.

"Let's see, the power's been out for an hour so, no, the coffee's not still hot."

And is it just the northeast, or does this happen disproportionally at 7-Elevens?  I don't see a lot of articles of people driving into CVS or Papa John's.  It's always 7-11.

/No you can't come in and taste it to be sure.


I've seen it at a local bp station too, though they had a cement thing the car got stuck on.

I think its drunken beer runs, personally. Drunken idiot "its just a minute away, so I'll be fine" driver on a beer run farks up big.
 
2013-03-22 03:00:00 AM  

fusillade762: Aulus: BarkingUnicorn: He knows he needs some of these, but corporate seems to disagree.

[jinminzhou.com image 800x727]

I am just guessing, but it might be because suppliers, especially soft drink and beer truck drivers want to be able to dolly in big loads of product and the poles would get in the way.  The poles might also cut down the availability of one or two parking spaces out front.

Works OK for Plaid Pantry:

Of course there are none in front of the door.


Stupid ass plaid pantry. They don't even carry energy drinks.
 
2013-03-22 03:03:11 AM  

neongoats: No Line For Beer: thisiszombocom: if 7-11 is open 24 hrs, why do they have locks on the doors?

To keep morons out when the power goes out.

"Let's see, the power's been out for an hour so, no, the coffee's not still hot."

And is it just the northeast, or does this happen disproportionally at 7-Elevens?  I don't see a lot of articles of people driving into CVS or Papa John's.  It's always 7-11.

/No you can't come in and taste it to be sure.

I've seen it at a local bp station too, though they had a cement thing the car got stuck on.

I think its drunken beer runs, personally. Drunken idiot "its just a minute away, so I'll be fine" driver on a beer run farks up big.


7-11's don't usually have beer in NJ. When I moved to Colorado I was blown away by beer in the 7-11.
 
2013-03-22 03:03:52 AM  
This has happened at two of the three 7-11s in my part of town.  Both times it was a drunk rushing to buy beer for the ride home before the 2am cutoff.

Ah Michigan...I can smoke weed and carry a gun, but I can't buy booze after getting off work....
 
2013-03-22 03:55:57 AM  

ScreamingHangover: neongoats: No Line For Beer: thisiszombocom: if 7-11 is open 24 hrs, why do they have locks on the doors?

To keep morons out when the power goes out.

"Let's see, the power's been out for an hour so, no, the coffee's not still hot."

And is it just the northeast, or does this happen disproportionally at 7-Elevens?  I don't see a lot of articles of people driving into CVS or Papa John's.  It's always 7-11.

/No you can't come in and taste it to be sure.

I've seen it at a local bp station too, though they had a cement thing the car got stuck on.

I think its drunken beer runs, personally. Drunken idiot "its just a minute away, so I'll be fine" driver on a beer run farks up big.

7-11's don't usually have beer in NJ. When I moved to Colorado I was blown away by beer in the 7-11.


In Michigan all 7-11's carry beer, unless it also happens to have a gas station. A guy that worked at one of the gas station ones told me that it was state law that gas stations aren't allowed to sell alcohol. This can't be true though, because I know plenty of gas stations that do (most don't) and advertise the fact in plain sight. Just not 7-11 (maybe he mixed it up with some corporate policy).
 
2013-03-22 04:34:17 AM  

thisiszombocom: if 7-11 is open 24 hrs, why do they have locks on the doors?


They lock up when the power goes out.
 
2013-03-22 04:43:00 AM  
Batel said he thinks cars keep crashing at his location because the store does not have any yellow poles out front separating the parking lot from the building.

... as if the big farking building doesn't tell *most* drivers "Don't farking drive here, there's a building in the farking way?"

yeah, *there's * your problem. yellow poles.

Phrozen
/ugh
 
2013-03-22 05:03:16 AM  

PhrozenStar: Batel said he thinks cars keep crashing at his location because the store does not have any yellow poles out front separating the parking lot from the building.

... as if the big farking building doesn't tell *most* drivers "Don't farking drive here, there's a building in the farking way?"

yeah, *there's * your problem. yellow poles.

Phrozen
/ugh


The poles aren't there to alert drivers, they're there to block the building from being crashed into.
 
2013-03-22 05:08:47 AM  

Abacus9: PhrozenStar: Batel said he thinks cars keep crashing at his location because the store does not have any yellow poles out front separating the parking lot from the building.

... as if the big farking building doesn't tell *most* drivers "Don't farking drive here, there's a building in the farking way?"

yeah, *there's * your problem. yellow poles.

Phrozen
/ugh

The poles aren't there to alert drivers, they're there to block the building from being crashed into.




i1.ytimg.com
 
2013-03-22 05:10:51 AM  

StoPPeRmobile: Abacus9: PhrozenStar: Batel said he thinks cars keep crashing at his location because the store does not have any yellow poles out front separating the parking lot from the building.

... as if the big farking building doesn't tell *most* drivers "Don't farking drive here, there's a building in the farking way?"

yeah, *there's * your problem. yellow poles.

Phrozen
/ugh

The poles aren't there to alert drivers, they're there to block the building from being crashed into.

[i1.ytimg.com image 480x360]


D'oh!
 
2013-03-22 05:20:12 AM  

Abacus9: StoPPeRmobile: Abacus9: PhrozenStar: Batel said he thinks cars keep crashing at his location because the store does not have any yellow poles out front separating the parking lot from the building.

... as if the big farking building doesn't tell *most* drivers "Don't farking drive here, there's a building in the farking way?"

yeah, *there's * your problem. yellow poles.

Phrozen
/ugh

The poles aren't there to alert drivers, they're there to block the building from being crashed into.

[i1.ytimg.com image 480x360]

D'oh!




lulz
 
GBB
2013-03-22 06:34:48 AM  
Are bollards really that expensive to put up??
 
2013-03-22 07:20:23 AM  

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: Also, from the article:

This marks the sixth time a car has driven into the same building, according to the store's manager

...


Batel said he's been in the store every time a car has driven into the location."It just keeps happening," he said.


I'm torn as to whether or not to go to his store and ask him to pick the winning lotto numbers.


No way, man. Someone's clearly out to kill this guy and if you show up to buy a lotto ticket from him, YOU'LL probably end up with a car #7 sticking out of your chest.
 
2013-03-22 07:59:55 AM  
Clicked article, leaving disappointed. I thought the garage door thing was a reference to
the girth of their patrons or something....

Sigh...
 
2013-03-22 08:40:12 AM  

El_Frijole_Blanco: I hope they remember the sign


This
 
2013-03-22 02:11:50 PM  

BarkingUnicorn: He knows he needs some of these, but corporate seems to disagree.

[jinminzhou.com image 800x727]


I disagree.  The 7-11's in my area do not have pillars and ppl don't drive into them.  The issue is the drivers.

Is this a retirement area?  Are the people young or old?  I suspect old, obviously.

America has terrible drivers.  Some of the worst in the world.  Our process to obtain a drivers license is far to inexpensive and simple.  I never had a permit, drove for one week around 15-30 minutes a day, did not read the DMV manual, and passed both tests on my first try.  Even those who are obviously far too incompetent to have a license are allowed to test over and over until they finally get it.. and yeah now they are considered "safe".  We also do not restrict / remove licenses from people who are no longer capable of safe driving.

Without rethinking who we let drive terrible drivers will continue to baffle others with their ridiculous accidents.  Thankfully this time no one was injured.
 
2013-03-22 02:47:40 PM  
This marks the sixth time a car has driven into the same building, according to the store's manager
Batel said he's been in the store every time a car has driven into the location."It just keeps happening," he said.


Batel does not know, however, that far back in the mists of time, his great great great great...great grandfather was actually the sun god Helios, who was also the god of chariots (back then, gods were always bedding down mortal women).

You see, it's not the DRIVERS who are doing the crashing...it's the vehicles themselves - they're performing an act of worship.

/could be worse...at least he's not a rain god...
 
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