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(Sun News Network)   There's the odd couple and then there's killing your roommate because of a mess in the kitchen   (sunnewsnetwork.ca) divider line 53
    More: Strange, roommates, Fort McMurray, strangling  
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3936 clicks; posted to Main » on 21 Mar 2013 at 11:40 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-03-21 07:57:51 PM  
Finally, Quentin Tarantino's The Odd Couple.
 
2013-03-21 09:43:43 PM  
Remembering some of my roommates, I'm kind of on the killer's side here.
 
2013-03-21 10:29:47 PM  
  You know there's alot of people who would appreciate having their gravy tossed..
 
2013-03-21 10:43:13 PM  

God Is My Co-Pirate: Remembering some of my roommates, I'm kind of on the killer's side here.


If I had an alibi, I'd have already done this.

/Who leaves rice in a pan for a month?
 
2013-03-21 10:49:15 PM  

RedPhoenix122: God Is My Co-Pirate: Remembering some of my roommates, I'm kind of on the killer's side here.

If I had an alibi, I'd have already done this.

/Who leaves rice in a pan for a month?


Mine thought he'd make chicken stock from scratch. So he rendered a chicken carcass in the microwave. And forgot about it. And went away for the week.
 
2013-03-21 11:43:09 PM  
If you're going to have roommates, you have to have a maid. Otherwise you should consider yourself lucky if murder is the worst thing that happens.
 
2013-03-21 11:46:53 PM  
I had a roommate who trimmed his toenails in the kitchen. On one of the counters. And then left a little pile of toenail clippings sitting there. On the kitchen counter.
Toenail clippings. On the kitchen counter.
Absorb that.
If you were on my jury, would you vote to convict?
 
2013-03-21 11:47:13 PM  
Good on him. This didn't happen overnight, it was a long time coming.

/ I hate people when they're not polite

MrEricSir: If you're going to have roommates, you have to have a maid. Otherwise you should consider yourself lucky if murder is the worst thing that happens.


Damn good advice.
 
2013-03-21 11:47:19 PM  
Now it's garbage murder!
 
2013-03-21 11:47:48 PM  
Why not just wipe your arse with his/her towels
 
2013-03-21 11:48:04 PM  
The killer is the one who left the mess.

Protip: if the large, drunk, pinheaded Neanderthal you're rooming with threw gravy all over the kitchen and punched holes in the walls, do not angrily confront him. Move out.
 
2013-03-21 11:50:27 PM  
neither i nor my eclectic collection of chemicals had anything to do with my ex-roommate's permanent nerve damage. the ex-roommate who left big chunks of various dinners around the house. who pushed a whole damn half-eaten plate of roast and something under the couch and left it there. who never did the freekin dishes. who broke my freekin couch. who somehow managed to make the whole kitchen greasy.

nope, i don't know how that strange nerve damage thing happened. but the guys in the article were Newfies, so imma give the accused a free pass.
 
2013-03-21 11:50:34 PM  
I've felt like possibly committing aggravated assault on someone for that reason, but i can't sanction murder

/piss on the toilet seat several times per day makes me feel murderous
 
2013-03-21 11:50:38 PM  

CaptSacto: I had a roommate who trimmed his toenails in the kitchen. On one of the counters. And then left a little pile of toenail clippings sitting there. On the kitchen counter.
Toenail clippings. On the kitchen counter.
Absorb that.
If you were on my jury, would you vote to convict?


If that was the only thing you noticed he did, imagine all the stuff you didn't see.
 
2013-03-21 11:58:21 PM  
Oh man.  My friend in college had some of the worst roommates ever.  The kitchen in the house they rented was beyond disgusting, by the third month they had stopped using the sink because the mold was crawling up the wall.  Liquid would occasionally drip from the cabinents onto the counter below, the whole place was a hazmat site.
 
2013-03-21 11:59:50 PM  
 
2013-03-22 12:05:47 AM  
I had a Mongolian roommate once.  Raw meat constant left out on the kitchen counter, and milk in every state of spoilage all over the place.
 
2013-03-22 12:06:42 AM  
My worst life stories all start with "I had this roommate who..._____"
 
2013-03-22 12:13:38 AM  

God Is My Co-Pirate: Remembering some of my roommates, I'm kind of on the killer's side here.


I'm surprised this wasn't said right off the bat.
 
2013-03-22 12:14:28 AM  

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: Finally, Quentin Tarantino's The Odd Couple.


Oh joy, rapture, and gratuitous bloodshed  !

/I'd even go see it in the theater
 
2013-03-22 12:15:35 AM  
I bet that son of a biatch was letting the dishes "soak."
 
2013-03-22 12:16:02 AM  

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: Finally, Quentin Tarantino's The Odd Couple.


We're all out of Corn Flakes. --F.U.
 
2013-03-22 12:19:45 AM  

drjekel_mrhyde: Why not just wipe your arse with his/her towels


I had a roommate who used two of my towels to clean up after he clogged the toilet.

For my revenge I didn't kill him, I just put the towels in his bed.  (Yeah, he didn't wash them.  He put them in my dirty laundry.  Seriously.  Who the fark does that?)

It seemed worse at the moment.
 
2013-03-22 12:20:48 AM  

davidphogan: drjekel_mrhyde: Why not just wipe your arse with his/her towels

I had a roommate who used two of my towels to clean up after he clogged the toilet.

For my revenge I didn't kill him, I just put the towels in his bed.  (Yeah, he didn't wash them.  He put them in my dirty laundry.  Seriously.  Who the fark does that?)

It seemed worse at the moment.


I should add, they were under his covers.
 
2013-03-22 12:21:32 AM  
Newfoundland.  Canada's  drunken unemployable deadbeat cousin.
 
2013-03-22 12:28:29 AM  
I've had a few awful roommates. One straight out of China who didn't know not to put metal in a microwave (first a can of soup, and then minutes later after being told "No" a metal pot with a fork in it). The other was a spoiled rich kid who was a douche and never did anything to help clean up amongst other douchetastic things.
 
2013-03-22 12:36:05 AM  
my roomate and I are getting a laugh out of this since we are in Edmonton.

*murderous laugh*
 
2013-03-22 12:50:52 AM  
Believe me, I spend most of my waking hours trying to drive our shiatty roomate out. biatch steals like a whole caravan of gypsies, keeps completely opposite hours from the 3 of us (who all need to be up by 4:30 am), blasts Michael Jackson's greatest hits non stop, routinely leaves the house not only unlocked, but actually will leave the front door OPEN all night long, smokes oxy pretty much every moment she's awake, throws cigarette butts all over even when she's within arms reach of an ashtray, and on and on and on.
 
2013-03-22 01:03:21 AM  

drewogatory: Believe me, I spend most of my waking hours trying to drive our shiatty roomate out. biatch steals like a whole caravan of gypsies, keeps completely opposite hours from the 3 of us (who all need to be up by 4:30 am), blasts Michael Jackson's greatest hits non stop, routinely leaves the house not only unlocked, but actually will leave the front door OPEN all night long, smokes oxy pretty much every moment she's awake, throws cigarette butts all over even when she's within arms reach of an ashtray, and on and on and on.


Ask her to leave?
 
2013-03-22 01:05:43 AM  
Roommates suck, always.  Your life should be dedicated to ensuring you are able to live without them.
 
2013-03-22 01:06:08 AM  

drewogatory: Believe me, I spend most of my waking hours trying to drive our shiatty roomate out. biatch steals like a whole caravan of gypsies, keeps completely opposite hours from the 3 of us (who all need to be up by 4:30 am), blasts Michael Jackson's greatest hits non stop, routinely leaves the house not only unlocked, but actually will leave the front door OPEN all night long, smokes oxy pretty much every moment she's awake, throws cigarette butts all over even when she's within arms reach of an ashtray, and on and on and on.


Sounds like she could suck the label off a Spalding baseball bat.  Count your blessings.
 
2013-03-22 01:10:45 AM  

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: Finally, Quentin Tarantino's The Odd Couple.


And done in one.
 
2013-03-22 01:15:32 AM  
I knew a guy who apparently figured that if the toilet's plugged and overflowing, use another toilet.
 
2013-03-22 01:34:38 AM  
I lived with my brother and his girlfriend for a while, and in thanks for their letting me stay with them (I did pay rent) I took it upon myself to keep the common areas (kitchen and living room) clean.  One day I was cleaning the kitchen and was cleaning a peninsula counter.  The girlfriend had some water on the stove to make some hot chocolate. She poured cocoa powder in a cup, added hot water, and stirred it while talking to me.  She then put the hot chocolate covered spoon down on the counter where I had just wiped, turned around to the sink to add some cold water, and walked out of the kitchen.  Yeah, if I could have gotten away with it I would have been seriously tempted to kill her that day.
 
2013-03-22 01:47:56 AM  
Please  DO NOT KILL YOUR ROOMMATE!

There is a serious shortage of Soylent Green and every little bit helps. Just send them out to collect food on Tuesday (which is Soylent Green day) and they should be neatly swept up in the raid-no fuss, no muss.

  i651.photobucket.com

That's two problems solved at once!
 
2013-03-22 02:09:50 AM  

Mock26: I lived with my brother and his girlfriend for a while, and in thanks for their letting me stay with them (I did pay rent) I took it upon myself to keep the common areas (kitchen and living room) clean.  One day I was cleaning the kitchen and was cleaning a peninsula counter.  The girlfriend had some water on the stove to make some hot chocolate. She poured cocoa powder in a cup, added hot water, and stirred it while talking to me.  She then put the hot chocolate covered spoon down on the counter where I had just wiped, turned around to the sink to add some cold water, and walked out of the kitchen.  Yeah, if I could have gotten away with it I would have been seriously tempted to kill her that day.


At the very least, she should have caught a flying spoon to the back of the head
 
2013-03-22 02:16:36 AM  
friggin newfies, man always making us normal canadians look bad
 
2013-03-22 02:39:17 AM  
Evidently green side up matters when it's two-week-old bread left out on the counter
 
2013-03-22 02:48:31 AM  
I had a roommate in college who almost never cooked. The one time he did, he pan-fried frozen steak-umms on the stove, immersed in olive oil. The smell literally made me puke, and the greasy grade-D meat smoke engendered by the low-burn temperature of the olive oil kept the smell in the apartment for days.
 
2013-03-22 02:51:50 AM  

bugcrusher: drewogatory: Believe me, I spend most of my waking hours trying to drive our shiatty roomate out. biatch steals like a whole caravan of gypsies, keeps completely opposite hours from the 3 of us (who all need to be up by 4:30 am), blasts Michael Jackson's greatest hits non stop, routinely leaves the house not only unlocked, but actually will leave the front door OPEN all night long, smokes oxy pretty much every moment she's awake, throws cigarette butts all over even when she's within arms reach of an ashtray, and on and on and on.

Ask her to leave?


It's her house.
 
2013-03-22 02:57:25 AM  

deadsanta: I had a roommate in college who almost never cooked. The one time he did, he pan-fried frozen steak-umms on the stove, immersed in olive oil. The smell literally made me puke, and the greasy grade-D meat smoke engendered by the low-burn temperature of the olive oil kept the smell in the apartment for days.


Thread's over. Turn out the lights. This guy wins. I can't believe his roommate cooked farking Steak-ums. Unbelievable! Murder has got nothing on this. Worst. Roomate. Ever.
 
2013-03-22 03:51:03 AM  

MrEricSir: If you're going to have roommates, you have to have a maid. Otherwise you should consider yourself lucky if murder is the worst thing that happens.


Well, if one them's a sub, you've got it made (or maid).
 
2013-03-22 03:51:55 AM  

CaptSacto: I had a roommate who trimmed his toenails in the kitchen. On one of the counters. And then left a little pile of toenail clippings sitting there. On the kitchen counter.
Toenail clippings. On the kitchen counter.
Absorb that.
If you were on my jury, would you vote to convict?


Not you.  Can I convict post-mortem?
 
2013-03-22 04:04:21 AM  
I can't take it anymore, Felix, I'm cracking up. Everything you do irritates me. And when you're not here, the things I know you're gonna do when you come in irritate me. You leave me little notes on my pillow. Told you 158 times I can't stand little notes on my pillow. "We're all out of cornflakes. F.U." Took me three hours to figure out F.U. was Felix Ungar!
 
2013-03-22 04:56:57 AM  
Interesting to see how many people don't actually read the article before commenting...
 
2013-03-22 05:00:12 AM  
3.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-03-22 06:04:55 AM  
Oh, the stories I could tell.

Okay, just one.

I had some friends (a couple of brothers) who had a woman living in their house. (Tl;dr: she has BPD and manipulated one of the home owners, who was mentally handicapped, to give her a key without letting the other know about it) She wasn't renting a room or anything, she was staying there for free all the while complaining about everything. She claimed she would pay rent, but only if all her many demands were met. They were too busy working to pay for the mortgage to fulfill her every whim. That is until they both lost their jobs. So, seeing this as an opportunity to get some money out of this freeloader, they satisfied all her demands.

This was when she decided to move.

Except, she continued to use their garage to store her stuff. She did this by, once again, manipulating the tarded brother into giving her one of the garage door remotes without the other brother knowing about it.

It's been months and she still hasn't paid them squat for anything and their garage is still filled with her shiat. Oh, and her mail still goes there. Apparently, she didn't want to change her address in case she moved again as it would effect her credit.
 
2013-03-22 06:06:09 AM  

Nezray: Interesting to see how many people don't actually read the article before commenting...


I think that's how the internets works nowadays. It's more about the conversation, not relevance.
 
2013-03-22 06:51:37 AM  
God Is My Co-Pirate:
Remembering some of my roommates, I'm kind of on the killer's side here.

Yeah... Jason, who wouldn't shut up about "Oh!  My Goddess!" comics and whose mom did his dishes every two weeks, you are lucky to be alive.  Karen, who tried to steal my cat, you too.  Then again, reading this thread, maybe I should have given them a medal for not being the worst.

GreatGlavinsGhost:
their garage is still filled with her shiat.

Wonder how much it would sell for?
 
2013-03-22 07:50:10 AM  
Surely not them
2.bp.blogspot.com
 
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