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(Wired)   I went home with a waitress, the way I always do. How was I to know she was with the Chinese too?   (wired.com) divider line 81
    More: Dumbass, Chinese, United States, war plan, Anna Chapman, monitors, military contractor, student visa, People's Republic of China  
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16609 clicks; posted to Main » on 21 Mar 2013 at 5:44 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-03-21 12:08:15 AM
Man, somebody should send this guy a lawyer and some guns. And perhaps some money also, that would be genius!
 
2013-03-21 12:27:36 AM
What's the first lesson they teach you when you're a geek who handles sensitive government information?  Beautiful women aren't actually attracted to you.
 
2013-03-21 12:47:23 AM
Sounds like the sh*t has hit the fan
 
2013-03-21 12:50:50 AM
"Get me out of this one Dad!'
 
2013-03-21 12:58:21 AM
That's a fun URL
 
2013-03-21 02:56:32 AM
It's easy subby. Just leave a glass of coke on the side and watch to see if she pees in it.
 
2013-03-21 03:17:09 AM

Mentat: What's the first lesson they teach you when you're a geek who handles sensitive government information?  Beautiful women aren't actually attracted to you.


Heh, time to start hitting up defense conferences and pretending to be a nuclear geek.
 
2013-03-21 05:28:58 AM

ShawnDoc: Mentat: What's the first lesson they teach you when you're a geek who handles sensitive government information?  Beautiful women aren't actually attracted to you.

Heh, time to start hitting up defense conferences and pretending to be a nuclear geek.


It will be a shame when she kills you in your sleep for giving her false information and making her look bad to her superiors. I guess you can take some comfort in the fact that she too will soon be shot.
 
2013-03-21 05:32:44 AM

EvilEgg: ShawnDoc: Mentat: What's the first lesson they teach you when you're a geek who handles sensitive government information?  Beautiful women aren't actually attracted to you.

Heh, time to start hitting up defense conferences and pretending to be a nuclear geek.

It will be a shame when she kills you in your sleep for giving her false information and making her look bad to her superiors. I guess you can take some comfort in the fact that she too will soon be shot.


I have discovered Tom Clancy's Fark handle!

+1
 
2013-03-21 05:44:06 AM

DammitIForgotMyLogin: It's easy subby. Just leave a glass of coke on the side and watch to see if she pees in it.


Wha?
 
2013-03-21 05:46:20 AM
Sounds like an excitable boy...
 
2013-03-21 05:48:44 AM

ib_thinkin: DammitIForgotMyLogin: It's easy subby. Just leave a glass of coke on the side and watch to see if she pees in it.

Wha?


Me Chinese, me play joke!
 
2013-03-21 05:53:15 AM

ib_thinkin: DammitIForgotMyLogin: It's easy subby. Just leave a glass of coke on the side and watch to see if she pees in it.

Wha?


How have you NOT heard that joke at least 600 times here on fark?
 
2013-03-21 05:54:04 AM
If he's desperate he can hide in Honduras.
 
2013-03-21 05:55:23 AM
This guy knew exactly what he was doing. He went out of his way to get answers for her. I'm guessing that he's kind of a fat guy that had never gotten any, and the thought of her going away was scary to him. Poor girl had to had to just lay back and think of China.
 
2013-03-21 05:56:39 AM
FTFA: ... Person 1, a "27-year-old female citizen of the People's Republic of China" in the United States on a student visa ... Bishop supposedly e-mailed Person 1 classified information on "existing war plans, information regarding nuclear weapons, and relations with international partners." ...

The surveillance trap caught much more than just that one e-mail. Bishop is accused of blabbing to Person 1 about "planned deployment of U.S. strategic nuclear systems"; "the ability of the U.S. to detect low and medium range ballistic missiles of foreign governments"; and, on multiple occasions, "the deployment of U.S. early warning radar systems in the Pacific rim."

Person 1 allegedly used Bishop as her intern. While saying that she didn't want him telling her any secrets, she queried him on what Western powers "know about about the operation of a particular naval asset of the People's Republic of China."


Now, it might be that, as a (former, as of December) defense contractor married to a Chinese national who was in the U.S. on a student visa, that I'm a little bit sympathetic to this guy's plight for personal reasons. Or it might be that some of the accusations sound less than water-tight.

She's a 27-year-old foreign student at a defense conference, which suggests to me that she's not in a technical field, and she's there as an intern, perhaps a law student with a defense company's contracting department. Or maybe she snuck in. Who knows? But then the article says that Bishop was her intern, which makes even less sense.

The characterizations of the leaks are both scary and vague. The fact that the guy's in trouble suggests that there might be something to the leaks, but the fact that it's such a vague accusation could mean that he's being made an example of. But it's that last part that bugs me: the Chinese naval asset they're referring to is most assuredly the new aircraft carrier, and there's any number of ways that can come up in conversation between these two people - for example, the fact that it's been widely publicized and is in the news is one way. It came up between my wife and I because the mother of a mutual friend (another Chinese national on a student visa) of ours was an engineer who worked on the design of the thing.

Clearly this guy lacked the good sense to avoid the questions about work that a loved one invariably asks you, no matter the industry you're in ("What's it like inside a submarine?" "Small."), but I think it's far from clear that he did anything wrong.
 
2013-03-21 05:57:18 AM
images.wikia.com
Okay, so she was North Korean - but the idea was the same.
And who would have said no?
 
2013-03-21 05:58:26 AM

Smoking GNU: How have you NOT heard that joke at least 600 times here on fark?


No idea, but I did, I guess.
 
2013-03-21 06:04:32 AM
Excitable subby, they all said.
 
2013-03-21 06:04:43 AM

ib_thinkin: Smoking GNU: How have you NOT heard that joke at least 600 times here on fark?

No idea, but I did, I guess.


I could have written that better: No idea how I missed it, but I guess I did.
 
2013-03-21 06:18:25 AM
Really? The guy's name is Benjamin Pierce and no one makes a M*A*S*H joke? I am disappointed.
 
2013-03-21 06:23:48 AM
You know, this whole Asian fetish that is so popularized in the geek subset could really come to the advantage of the Chinese. They could start pumping out Asian porn aimed at the geeks, and make an Asian girl the most desirable thing for a geeky teenager.

Then, when geeky teenagers grow and start working in defense and engineering, the Chinese send over thousands of oriental honey-pots to seduce secrets out of them.
 
2013-03-21 06:26:28 AM
I'd show her where my missile was deployed.
 
2013-03-21 06:31:28 AM

Teknowaffle: You know, this whole Asian fetish that is so popularized in the geek subset could really come to the advantage of the Chinese. They could start pumping out Asian porn aimed at the geeks, and make an Asian girl the most desirable thing for a geeky teenager.

Then, when geeky teenagers grow and start working in defense and engineering, the Chinese send over thousands of oriental honey-pots to seduce secrets out of them.


It'll never work.

/[insert some regressive bigoted speech here]
 
2013-03-21 06:43:08 AM

johnnygew: [images.wikia.com image 401x224]
Okay, so she was North Korean - but the idea was the same.
And who would have said no?


Just lay back and think of Dear Leader?

*shudder*  The thought of Kim Jong Chubby getting naked with a girl is a real boner kill...
 
2013-03-21 06:44:06 AM

mekkab: Teknowaffle: You know, this whole Asian fetish that is so popularized in the geek subset could really come to the advantage of the Chinese. They could start pumping out Asian porn aimed at the geeks, and make an Asian girl the most desirable thing for a geeky teenager.

Then, when geeky teenagers grow and start working in defense and engineering, the Chinese send over thousands of oriental honey-pots to seduce secrets out of them.

It'll never work.

/[insert some regressive bigoted speech here]


It could work.

Our government needs to start a counter chinese poon program to supply all our geeks with free chinese poon. This way their desires will be satiated and the chinese spies will have no effect.
 
2013-03-21 06:45:42 AM

Teknowaffle: You know, this whole Asian fetish that is so popularized in the geek subset could really come to the advantage of the Chinese. They could start pumping out Asian porn aimed at the geeks, and make an Asian girl the most desirable thing for a geeky teenager.

Then, when geeky teenagers grow and start working in defense and engineering, the Chinese send over thousands of oriental honey-pots to seduce secrets out of them.


Hmmm. I HAVE seen some Asian girl sites advertising on WoW sites..
 
2013-03-21 06:52:48 AM
It's worse than I originally thought, I expected Howard Wolowitz but a quick checked it turns out he's 59. At some point you'd really need to ask yourself why is this foreign national half my age asking me questions about my country's defences?

/Let's hope the sex was good.
 
2013-03-21 06:57:31 AM
"Things that don't make for appropriate pillow talk: Titan intercontinental ballistic missiles."

Actually, I think Titan ICBM's make perfectly appropriate pillow talk, since they were deactivated in the late 80's as an ICBM, and the space launch fleet was retired in 2005. And since, where ICBM's are concerned, it was one of the biggest, why not impress the ladies?

/least the author could do is spend a few seconds on Google to find some current examples to use...
 
2013-03-21 07:05:36 AM

Clash City Farker: mekkab: Teknowaffle: You know, this whole Asian fetish that is so popularized in the geek subset could really come to the advantage of the Chinese. They could start pumping out Asian porn aimed at the geeks, and make an Asian girl the most desirable thing for a geeky teenager.

Then, when geeky teenagers grow and start working in defense and engineering, the Chinese send over thousands of oriental honey-pots to seduce secrets out of them.

It'll never work.

/[insert some regressive bigoted speech here]

It could work.

Our government needs to start a counter chinese poon program to supply all our geeks with free chinese poon. This way their desires will be satiated and the chinese spies will have no effect.


So some manner of government funded Asian call girl company? Wonder what department that comes under?
 
2013-03-21 07:08:13 AM

voodoohotdog: Clash City Farker: mekkab: Teknowaffle: You know, this whole Asian fetish that is so popularized in the geek subset could really come to the advantage of the Chinese. They could start pumping out Asian porn aimed at the geeks, and make an Asian girl the most desirable thing for a geeky teenager.

Then, when geeky teenagers grow and start working in defense and engineering, the Chinese send over thousands of oriental honey-pots to seduce secrets out of them.

It'll never work.

/[insert some regressive bigoted speech here]

It could work.

Our government needs to start a counter chinese poon program to supply all our geeks with free chinese poon. This way their desires will be satiated and the chinese spies will have no effect.

So some manner of government funded Asian call girl company? Wonder what department that comes under?


The Counter Infiltrating Asians dept.
 
2013-03-21 07:09:14 AM
Hang him.  Shoot her.
 
2013-03-21 07:12:53 AM

The Muthaship: Hang him.  Shoot her.


Thank you, Judge Dredd.
 
2013-03-21 07:19:36 AM

The Muthaship: Hang him.  Shoot her.


Hang him. Have her bathed and brought to my chambers.
 
2013-03-21 07:21:19 AM
There's no possible way he didn't know what was going on.
 
2013-03-21 07:26:36 AM

Teknowaffle: You know, this whole Asian fetish that is so popularized in the geek subset could really come to the advantage of the Chinese. They could start pumping out Asian porn aimed at the geeks, and make an Asian girl the most desirable thing for a geeky teenager.

Then, when geeky teenagers grow and start working in defense and engineering, the Chinese send over thousands of oriental honey-pots to seduce secrets out of them.


But, won't they be totally confused when they find out that Asian women's genitals aren't really pixelated like in all the porn? Now, that'll be the only thing that turns them on, and the real unpixelated deal won't work on them!

/Seriously, what the hell is the point of producing porn only to censor out the important bits??
//It's like producing a slasher flick only to censor out any blood and gore...
 
2013-03-21 07:27:17 AM

Captain Swoop: "Things that don't make for appropriate pillow talk: Titan intercontinental ballistic missiles."

Actually, I think Titan ICBM's make perfectly appropriate pillow talk, since they were deactivated in the late 80's as an ICBM, and the space launch fleet was retired in 2005. And since, where ICBM's are concerned, it was one of the biggest, why not impress the ladies?

/least the author could do is spend a few seconds on Google to find some current examples to use...


Wasn't that a Northern Exposure episode?
 
2013-03-21 07:28:11 AM

rabidarmadillo24: This guy knew exactly what he was doing. He went out of his way to get answers for her. I'm guessing that he's kind of a fat guy that had never gotten any, and the thought of her going away was scary to him. Poor girl had to had to just lay back and think of China.


This.  Everyone gets a class on "if American women don't find you attractive, foreign women do not either.  If you are attractive to them, then it is probably because you have something they want." This guy knew exactly what he was doing, but he was thinking with the wrong head.

Teknowaffle: You know, this whole Asian fetish that is so popularized in the geek subset could really come to the advantage of the Chinese. They could start pumping out Asian porn aimed at the geeks, and make an Asian girl the most desirable thing for a geeky teenager.

Then, when geeky teenagers grow and start working in defense and engineering, the Chinese send over thousands of oriental honey-pots to seduce secrets out of them.


Duffle blog covered this already:   http://www.duffelblog.com/2012/06/chinese-hacker-complains-perverted- a merican-military/
 
2013-03-21 07:28:32 AM

RatMaster999: Sounds like an excitable boy...


I was getting Seger from that headline......maybe it's just the lack of caffeine.

"But your thoughts will soon be wandering
The way they always do
When you're ridin' sixteen hours
And there's nothin' much to do "
 
2013-03-21 07:30:47 AM
YELLOW FEVER!

And just in keeping with the musical theme Bowie's My Little China Girl would also work.
 
2013-03-21 07:31:19 AM

ChubbyTiger: The Muthaship: Hang him.  Shoot her.

Hang him. Have her bathed and brought to my chambers.


Too cruel.
 
2013-03-21 07:42:20 AM
Picture here.

Not fat, but aging. Hot Chinese ass half is age is a helluva drug.
 
2013-03-21 07:47:05 AM

HotWingConspiracy: Picture here.

Not fat, but aging. Hot Chinese ass half is age is a helluva drug.


I think that's an attorney in that pic.  No way that's a 27 year old.
 
2013-03-21 07:53:24 AM

Alphax: HotWingConspiracy: Picture here.

Not fat, but aging. Hot Chinese ass half is age is a helluva drug.

I think that's an attorney in that pic.  No way that's a 27 year old.


If you're referring to the woman in the 2nd pic, yes, that's a US Attorney. His picture is above that.
 
2013-03-21 07:54:42 AM
I see the BIG BANG THEORY has already been referenced, so here is are pictures of Kaley Cuoco & Asia Carerra as place  holders:

www.magxone.com <img data-cke-saved-src="http://www.peoples.r" alt="http://www.peoples.rwww.peoples.ru" alt="www.peoples.ru/art/cinema/actor/asia_carrera/carrera_2.jpg">">
 
2013-03-21 08:05:54 AM

Sonneillon: It's worse than I originally thought, I expected Howard Wolowitz but a quick checked it turns out he's 59. At some point you'd really need to ask yourself why is this foreign national half my age asking me questions about my country's defences?

/Let's hope the sex was good.


Boneheaded actions like this seem to happen with older, "seasoned" professionals way more than you'd expect. I can only conclude that at that age you may be perfectly aware of the risks but you just don't give a shiat. Even if you have a family, the kids are probably grown up, college and house are paid for, and the marriage died a long time ago. Not much time left, and not much left to protect.
 
2013-03-21 08:18:01 AM

HotWingConspiracy: Alphax: HotWingConspiracy: Picture here.

Not fat, but aging. Hot Chinese ass half is age is a helluva drug.

I think that's an attorney in that pic.  No way that's a 27 year old.

If you're referring to the woman in the 2nd pic, yes, that's a US Attorney. His picture is above that.


Ah, I thought you were referring to the woman.
 
2013-03-21 08:42:30 AM

johnnygew: [images.wikia.com image 401x224]
Okay, so she was North Korean - but the idea was the same.
And who would have said no?


Certainly not me, I have Yellow Fever.

/lawyers, guns, blah blah blah
 
2013-03-21 08:48:56 AM

Herr Morgenstern: Really? The guy's name is Benjamin Pierce and no one makes a M*A*S*H joke? I am disappointed.


You sound old.
 
2013-03-21 08:50:27 AM
I read in an article that she took him to Lee Ho Fook's.
 
2013-03-21 09:06:08 AM
i1168.photobucket.com

Damnation, don't these folks get briefed about the consequences of spilling even the most (seemingly) innocuous information as a standard procedure upon being granted clearance?  The security folks typically show everyone that gets a clearance a nice little documentary on this guy.  Then they mention how he got his family into the spy biz, and how he convinced his brother to turn over a confidential document (about the lowest level on the security ladder), for which the brother received around $3000.  That $3000 cost Walker's brother 99 years in jail.  Then they usually say "Is $3000 worth 99 years?  If you're gonna sell government secrets, it better be worth the risk."

Although Walker was just plain STUPID.  He was buying planes and boats and all kinds of stuff he couldn't afford on his official salary.  Still, he sold stuff to the Soviets for something like 20 years before they finally got the goods on him.  The damage done over the decades was unfathomable.
 
2013-03-21 09:10:45 AM
Sorry, I got as far as the Anna Chapman link and got distracted....
 
2013-03-21 09:34:16 AM

Sonneillon: It's worse than I originally thought, I expected Howard Wolowitz but a quick checked it turns out he's 59. At some point you'd really need to ask yourself why is this foreign national half my age asking me questions about my country's defences?

/Let's hope the sex was good.


An hour later he was horny again.
 
2013-03-21 09:34:22 AM
It is depressing to think people can be so easily ensnared by sexual offerings.  How hard is it to realize the person asking you about sensitive information is a spy?
 
2013-03-21 09:40:31 AM

Gergesa: It is depressing to think people can be so easily ensnared by sexual offerings.  How hard is it to realize the person asking you about sensitive information is a spy?


Sex has been the most effective tool in espionage since ever.
 
2013-03-21 09:47:25 AM
a2.ec-images.myspacecdn.com
 
2013-03-21 09:56:35 AM
www.propmasters.net

Never trust a beautiful woman. Especially one who's interested in you.

/she might inject metal into your ass
 
2013-03-21 09:57:54 AM

The Muthaship: Gergesa: It is depressing to think people can be so easily ensnared by sexual offerings.  How hard is it to realize the person asking you about sensitive information is a spy?

Sex has been the most effective tool in espionage since ever.


That is why it is depressing.  People lose their minds too easily.
 
2013-03-21 10:26:21 AM

Gergesa: It is depressing to think people can be so easily ensnared by sexual offerings.  How hard is it to realize the person asking you about sensitive information is a spy?



I know... It happens often enough but it just boggles my mind. I just don't understand thinking anything other than, "Gee, this hot foreign chick is interested in balistic missle guidance systems... because THAT'S believable. I'm going to fark her brains out and just flat out refuse to talk about anything headier than what the Kardassians are up to until she gets frustrated and moves on. Oh, and I'll report her too."

How do you not just use it against them and get the sex and give them nothing? I guess most of these guys probably haven't ever hooked up with any hot women, so they aren't used to it and get overwhelmed by the attention. This means we need to start up a corps of hot chicks who fark nerds. That way we can counter our enemies' most potent weapon.

Time to step up to the plate and REALLY love your country.
 
2013-03-21 10:59:56 AM

Clash City Farker: mekkab: Teknowaffle: You know, this whole Asian fetish that is so popularized in the geek subset could really come to the advantage of the Chinese. They could start pumping out Asian porn aimed at the geeks, and make an Asian girl the most desirable thing for a geeky teenager.

Then, when geeky teenagers grow and start working in defense and engineering, the Chinese send over thousands of oriental honey-pots to seduce secrets out of them.

It'll never work.

/[insert some regressive bigoted speech here]

It could work.

Our government needs to start a counter chinese poon program to supply all our geeks with free chinese poon. This way their desires will be satiated and the chinese spies will have no effect.


Luckily, our American born Asian poontang has bigger tits.
 
2013-03-21 11:07:55 AM

The WindowLicker: Duffle blog covered this already:   http://www.duffelblog.com/2012/06/chinese-hacker-complains-perverted- a merican-military/


I love reading the comments on that site that completely miss that it is satire.
 
2013-03-21 11:13:00 AM
Why would someone with top secret security clearance even consider entering into a relationship with a Chinese national? Also, anyone with security clearance is required to disclose relationships with any foreign national. I'm guessing this guy knew exactly what he was doing.
 
2013-03-21 11:24:51 AM
Back when I worked for a large company that was making big money deals in China, we had to attend 'how to conduct business in a China' classes.

One big part of it was security.  They pointed out that the government and the companies are the same entity, and the government owns the airplanes too.  They've already had instances where the seat arrangement on those long transatlantic flights was deliberately juggled so they could put an interested businessman next to an individual in our company, and basically drill them for details to be used as leverage in the upcoming business deals - basically, government sponsored industrial spies.  So, no talking business on the flight, no doing work, no meeting prep, etc.  Consider it all monitored.

They'll even be unsubtle about it.  One company we went in claimed that they couldn't let us leave with our laptops because they may have been connected to their internal network, and thus may have company data on them, but they had gone ahead and purchased us new models to make up for the trouble.  Of course, we had proprietary data analysis software on the laptop, a special build that was hard coded to only run on this laptop, and we were selling a service that utilized that software - but not the software itself.  Luckily, we were aware of this tactic, and the company officials were very troubled when we disassembled the hard drive and shattered the discs with a hammer in front of them.   I think one was going to cry.   I'm pretty sure one of them was fired.  Of course, we couldn't use the gifted laptops for anything either, there was no way to tell how they were infected or sabotaged.

The mindset in many Asian/East Asian businesses appears to be this: if you can get away with it, that validates doing it.
 
2013-03-21 11:39:44 AM
FTA: [S]he queried him on what Western powers "know about about the operation of a particular naval asset of the People's Republic of China."

Honey, have your bosses heard anything about my country's top secret nuclear-powered aircraft and missile carrier complete with EMP weaponry set to launch in April 2014?
 
2013-03-21 11:54:26 AM

RatMaster999: Sounds like an excitable boy...


Probably drank too many pina coladas at Trader Vic's.
 
2013-03-21 12:23:42 PM

Ozaru: Also, anyone with security clearance is required to disclose relationships with any foreign national.


In the early 80's we only had to disclose contact with people from "designated nations"...USSR, Iran, China, N. Korea, etc.  I had regular contact with British and Irish folks, in fact one of our co-workers was full-on Irish.

/I got laid off and discontinued that line of work 25yrs ago
//Oh thank you God, THANK YOU!!!
 
2013-03-21 12:48:33 PM

mongbiohazard: How do you not just use it against them and get the sex and give them nothing?


Do you think you are the first person who has thought of this?  They select their targets well, and they build up depedence.

Nezorf: I love reading the comments on that site that completely miss that it is satire.


Possibly one of the best parts of the site!

quietwalker: Back when I worked for a large company that was making big money deals in China, we had to attend 'how to conduct business in a China' classes.

(lots of good examples)

The mindset in many Asian/East Asian businesses appears to be this: if you can get away with it, that validates doing it.


This.  I don't know that companies really realize how much they are giving away in future profits by moving manufacturing to China.

I worked in a reasonably sensitive position in China.  After I left the country, I had to replace my computer and most of my electronics.  Even formatting the hard drives did not stop the  unique behavior they had started to exhibit.
 
2013-03-21 12:52:39 PM

ristst: Ozaru: Also, anyone with security clearance is required to disclose relationships with any foreign national.

In the early 80's we only had to disclose contact with people from "designated nations"...USSR, Iran, China, N. Korea, etc.  I had regular contact with British and Irish folks, in fact one of our co-workers was full-on Irish.

/I got laid off and discontinued that line of work 25yrs ago
//Oh thank you God, THANK YOU!!!



A few years ago a friend of mine working for the CIA met a fairly pretty French au paire and started schtupping. When he disclosed to his boss his new relationship he was told to immediately stop having contact with her.

"But she's just a college student from France!" he objected.
"Sure, that's what all the spies WANT you to think." his boss replied.

He stopped seeing her.
 
2013-03-21 12:58:03 PM

The WindowLicker: Do you think you are the first person who has thought of this? They select their targets well, and they build up depedence.


I suppose I'd just be a poor target for them then...

Time to start up the "US Women's Nerd Farking Corps" then, so brave, patriotic, American hotties can fark our engineers and scientists to keep our secrets safe! Don't you love freedom ladies? Fark a neckbeard with security clearance..... Do it now, do it for America!
 
2013-03-21 01:15:43 PM

mongbiohazard: The WindowLicker: Do you think you are the first person who has thought of this? They select their targets well, and they build up depedence.

I suppose I'd just be a poor target for them then...

Time to start up the "US Women's Nerd Farking Corps" then, so brave, patriotic, American hotties can fark our engineers and scientists to keep our secrets safe! Don't you love freedom ladies? Fark a neckbeard with security clearance..... Do it now, do it for America!


Modern day Victory Girls. If it was good enough for World War II, it should be good enough for the war on terror.
 
2013-03-21 01:21:08 PM

mongbiohazard: A few years ago a friend of mine working for the CIA met a fairly pretty French au paire and started schtupping. When he disclosed to his boss his new relationship he was told to immediately stop having contact with her.

"But she's just a college student from France!" he objected.
"Sure, that's what all the spies WANT you to think." his boss replied.

He stopped seeing her.


Man, I'm SO glad I got outta that line of work.  Some years later a keyboardist from Belarus joined my band, and ended up being one of my very best friends (and still is).  We never once discussed anything remotely government related, unless it was him talking about life in his home country, or the fact that he almost had to go to Afghanistan in the early 80s.

A few years earlier and I would've been forbidden to even speak to him.

I'll repeat:

/I got laid off and discontinued that line of work 25yrs ago
//Oh thank you God, THANK YOU!!!
 
2013-03-21 01:24:22 PM

mongbiohazard: I suppose I'd just be a poor target for them then...

Time to start up the "US Women's Nerd Farking Corps" then, so brave, patriotic, American hotties can fark our engineers and scientists to keep our secrets safe! Don't you love freedom ladies? Fark a neckbeard with security clearance..... Do it now, do it for America!


Brilliant.
 
2013-03-21 02:02:19 PM

MontanaDave: RatMaster999: Sounds like an excitable boy...

Probably drank too many pina coladas at Trader Vic's.


To be fair, his hair WAS perfect
 
2013-03-21 03:34:09 PM

booger42: MontanaDave: RatMaster999: Sounds like an excitable boy...

Probably drank too many pina coladas at Trader Vic's.

To be fair, his hair WAS perfect


And he was looking for James Taylor!

/the live version is even better
 
2013-03-21 05:27:13 PM
Firing Squad. Change his name to Roland, and blow his head off.

There's no way he didn't know good and well what he was doing blabbing to ANYone, much less a Chinese national.
 
2013-03-21 06:21:59 PM

voodoohotdog: Clash City Farker: mekkab: Teknowaffle: You know, this whole Asian fetish that is so popularized in the geek subset could really come to the advantage of the Chinese. They could start pumping out Asian porn aimed at the geeks, and make an Asian girl the most desirable thing for a geeky teenager.

Then, when geeky teenagers grow and start working in defense and engineering, the Chinese send over thousands of oriental honey-pots to seduce secrets out of them.

It'll never work.

/[insert some regressive bigoted speech here]

It could work.

Our government needs to start a counter chinese poon program to supply all our geeks with free chinese poon. This way their desires will be satiated and the chinese spies will have no effect.

So some manner of government funded Asian call girl company? Wonder what department that comes under?


The CIA's Protocol Harem section.
 
2013-03-21 06:27:15 PM

mongbiohazard: The WindowLicker: Do you think you are the first person who has thought of this? They select their targets well, and they build up depedence.

I suppose I'd just be a poor target for them then...

Time to start up the "US Women's Nerd Farking Corps" then, so brave, patriotic, American hotties can fark our engineers and scientists to keep our secrets safe! Don't you love freedom ladies? Fark a neckbeard with security clearance..... Do it now, do it for America!


Wait...I thought our engineers and scientists ARE Chinese.
 
2013-03-21 08:03:54 PM

Mentat: What's the first lesson they teach you when you're a geek who handles sensitive government information?  Beautiful women aren't actually attracted to you.


We are required to tell security if we have relations with any foreign nationals where I work... ha.
 
2013-03-21 09:55:07 PM
Why is China even bothering with a honeypot?  Aren't a significant number of defense contractor employees Chinese?
 
2013-03-22 12:25:48 AM

Ecliptic: Mentat: What's the first lesson they teach you when you're a geek who handles sensitive government information?  Beautiful women aren't actually attracted to you.

We are required to tell security if we have relations with any foreign nationals where I work... ha.


Technically, a handjob isn't relations.
 
2013-03-22 05:38:59 AM
Talk nerdy to me.  ITs A TRAP

{If she is that smart, she should know better than to date most of us}

For any other government contractors out there, just tell them you work as a janitor or a mechanic.
 
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