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(Wired)   I went home with a waitress, the way I always do. How was I to know she was with the Chinese too?   (wired.com) divider line 81
    More: Dumbass, Chinese, United States, war plan, Anna Chapman, monitors, military contractor, student visa, People's Republic of China  
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16609 clicks; posted to Main » on 21 Mar 2013 at 5:44 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-03-21 12:08:15 AM
Man, somebody should send this guy a lawyer and some guns. And perhaps some money also, that would be genius!
 
2013-03-21 12:27:36 AM
What's the first lesson they teach you when you're a geek who handles sensitive government information?  Beautiful women aren't actually attracted to you.
 
2013-03-21 12:47:23 AM
Sounds like the sh*t has hit the fan
 
2013-03-21 12:50:50 AM
"Get me out of this one Dad!'
 
2013-03-21 12:58:21 AM
That's a fun URL
 
2013-03-21 02:56:32 AM
It's easy subby. Just leave a glass of coke on the side and watch to see if she pees in it.
 
2013-03-21 03:17:09 AM

Mentat: What's the first lesson they teach you when you're a geek who handles sensitive government information?  Beautiful women aren't actually attracted to you.


Heh, time to start hitting up defense conferences and pretending to be a nuclear geek.
 
2013-03-21 05:28:58 AM

ShawnDoc: Mentat: What's the first lesson they teach you when you're a geek who handles sensitive government information?  Beautiful women aren't actually attracted to you.

Heh, time to start hitting up defense conferences and pretending to be a nuclear geek.


It will be a shame when she kills you in your sleep for giving her false information and making her look bad to her superiors. I guess you can take some comfort in the fact that she too will soon be shot.
 
2013-03-21 05:32:44 AM

EvilEgg: ShawnDoc: Mentat: What's the first lesson they teach you when you're a geek who handles sensitive government information?  Beautiful women aren't actually attracted to you.

Heh, time to start hitting up defense conferences and pretending to be a nuclear geek.

It will be a shame when she kills you in your sleep for giving her false information and making her look bad to her superiors. I guess you can take some comfort in the fact that she too will soon be shot.


I have discovered Tom Clancy's Fark handle!

+1
 
2013-03-21 05:44:06 AM

DammitIForgotMyLogin: It's easy subby. Just leave a glass of coke on the side and watch to see if she pees in it.


Wha?
 
2013-03-21 05:46:20 AM
Sounds like an excitable boy...
 
2013-03-21 05:48:44 AM

ib_thinkin: DammitIForgotMyLogin: It's easy subby. Just leave a glass of coke on the side and watch to see if she pees in it.

Wha?


Me Chinese, me play joke!
 
2013-03-21 05:53:15 AM

ib_thinkin: DammitIForgotMyLogin: It's easy subby. Just leave a glass of coke on the side and watch to see if she pees in it.

Wha?


How have you NOT heard that joke at least 600 times here on fark?
 
2013-03-21 05:54:04 AM
If he's desperate he can hide in Honduras.
 
2013-03-21 05:55:23 AM
This guy knew exactly what he was doing. He went out of his way to get answers for her. I'm guessing that he's kind of a fat guy that had never gotten any, and the thought of her going away was scary to him. Poor girl had to had to just lay back and think of China.
 
2013-03-21 05:56:39 AM
FTFA: ... Person 1, a "27-year-old female citizen of the People's Republic of China" in the United States on a student visa ... Bishop supposedly e-mailed Person 1 classified information on "existing war plans, information regarding nuclear weapons, and relations with international partners." ...

The surveillance trap caught much more than just that one e-mail. Bishop is accused of blabbing to Person 1 about "planned deployment of U.S. strategic nuclear systems"; "the ability of the U.S. to detect low and medium range ballistic missiles of foreign governments"; and, on multiple occasions, "the deployment of U.S. early warning radar systems in the Pacific rim."

Person 1 allegedly used Bishop as her intern. While saying that she didn't want him telling her any secrets, she queried him on what Western powers "know about about the operation of a particular naval asset of the People's Republic of China."


Now, it might be that, as a (former, as of December) defense contractor married to a Chinese national who was in the U.S. on a student visa, that I'm a little bit sympathetic to this guy's plight for personal reasons. Or it might be that some of the accusations sound less than water-tight.

She's a 27-year-old foreign student at a defense conference, which suggests to me that she's not in a technical field, and she's there as an intern, perhaps a law student with a defense company's contracting department. Or maybe she snuck in. Who knows? But then the article says that Bishop was her intern, which makes even less sense.

The characterizations of the leaks are both scary and vague. The fact that the guy's in trouble suggests that there might be something to the leaks, but the fact that it's such a vague accusation could mean that he's being made an example of. But it's that last part that bugs me: the Chinese naval asset they're referring to is most assuredly the new aircraft carrier, and there's any number of ways that can come up in conversation between these two people - for example, the fact that it's been widely publicized and is in the news is one way. It came up between my wife and I because the mother of a mutual friend (another Chinese national on a student visa) of ours was an engineer who worked on the design of the thing.

Clearly this guy lacked the good sense to avoid the questions about work that a loved one invariably asks you, no matter the industry you're in ("What's it like inside a submarine?" "Small."), but I think it's far from clear that he did anything wrong.
 
2013-03-21 05:57:18 AM
images.wikia.com
Okay, so she was North Korean - but the idea was the same.
And who would have said no?
 
2013-03-21 05:58:26 AM

Smoking GNU: How have you NOT heard that joke at least 600 times here on fark?


No idea, but I did, I guess.
 
2013-03-21 06:04:32 AM
Excitable subby, they all said.
 
2013-03-21 06:04:43 AM

ib_thinkin: Smoking GNU: How have you NOT heard that joke at least 600 times here on fark?

No idea, but I did, I guess.


I could have written that better: No idea how I missed it, but I guess I did.
 
2013-03-21 06:18:25 AM
Really? The guy's name is Benjamin Pierce and no one makes a M*A*S*H joke? I am disappointed.
 
2013-03-21 06:23:48 AM
You know, this whole Asian fetish that is so popularized in the geek subset could really come to the advantage of the Chinese. They could start pumping out Asian porn aimed at the geeks, and make an Asian girl the most desirable thing for a geeky teenager.

Then, when geeky teenagers grow and start working in defense and engineering, the Chinese send over thousands of oriental honey-pots to seduce secrets out of them.
 
2013-03-21 06:26:28 AM
I'd show her where my missile was deployed.
 
2013-03-21 06:31:28 AM

Teknowaffle: You know, this whole Asian fetish that is so popularized in the geek subset could really come to the advantage of the Chinese. They could start pumping out Asian porn aimed at the geeks, and make an Asian girl the most desirable thing for a geeky teenager.

Then, when geeky teenagers grow and start working in defense and engineering, the Chinese send over thousands of oriental honey-pots to seduce secrets out of them.


It'll never work.

/[insert some regressive bigoted speech here]
 
2013-03-21 06:43:08 AM

johnnygew: [images.wikia.com image 401x224]
Okay, so she was North Korean - but the idea was the same.
And who would have said no?


Just lay back and think of Dear Leader?

*shudder*  The thought of Kim Jong Chubby getting naked with a girl is a real boner kill...
 
2013-03-21 06:44:06 AM

mekkab: Teknowaffle: You know, this whole Asian fetish that is so popularized in the geek subset could really come to the advantage of the Chinese. They could start pumping out Asian porn aimed at the geeks, and make an Asian girl the most desirable thing for a geeky teenager.

Then, when geeky teenagers grow and start working in defense and engineering, the Chinese send over thousands of oriental honey-pots to seduce secrets out of them.

It'll never work.

/[insert some regressive bigoted speech here]


It could work.

Our government needs to start a counter chinese poon program to supply all our geeks with free chinese poon. This way their desires will be satiated and the chinese spies will have no effect.
 
2013-03-21 06:45:42 AM

Teknowaffle: You know, this whole Asian fetish that is so popularized in the geek subset could really come to the advantage of the Chinese. They could start pumping out Asian porn aimed at the geeks, and make an Asian girl the most desirable thing for a geeky teenager.

Then, when geeky teenagers grow and start working in defense and engineering, the Chinese send over thousands of oriental honey-pots to seduce secrets out of them.


Hmmm. I HAVE seen some Asian girl sites advertising on WoW sites..
 
2013-03-21 06:52:48 AM
It's worse than I originally thought, I expected Howard Wolowitz but a quick checked it turns out he's 59. At some point you'd really need to ask yourself why is this foreign national half my age asking me questions about my country's defences?

/Let's hope the sex was good.
 
2013-03-21 06:57:31 AM
"Things that don't make for appropriate pillow talk: Titan intercontinental ballistic missiles."

Actually, I think Titan ICBM's make perfectly appropriate pillow talk, since they were deactivated in the late 80's as an ICBM, and the space launch fleet was retired in 2005. And since, where ICBM's are concerned, it was one of the biggest, why not impress the ladies?

/least the author could do is spend a few seconds on Google to find some current examples to use...
 
2013-03-21 07:05:36 AM

Clash City Farker: mekkab: Teknowaffle: You know, this whole Asian fetish that is so popularized in the geek subset could really come to the advantage of the Chinese. They could start pumping out Asian porn aimed at the geeks, and make an Asian girl the most desirable thing for a geeky teenager.

Then, when geeky teenagers grow and start working in defense and engineering, the Chinese send over thousands of oriental honey-pots to seduce secrets out of them.

It'll never work.

/[insert some regressive bigoted speech here]

It could work.

Our government needs to start a counter chinese poon program to supply all our geeks with free chinese poon. This way their desires will be satiated and the chinese spies will have no effect.


So some manner of government funded Asian call girl company? Wonder what department that comes under?
 
2013-03-21 07:08:13 AM

voodoohotdog: Clash City Farker: mekkab: Teknowaffle: You know, this whole Asian fetish that is so popularized in the geek subset could really come to the advantage of the Chinese. They could start pumping out Asian porn aimed at the geeks, and make an Asian girl the most desirable thing for a geeky teenager.

Then, when geeky teenagers grow and start working in defense and engineering, the Chinese send over thousands of oriental honey-pots to seduce secrets out of them.

It'll never work.

/[insert some regressive bigoted speech here]

It could work.

Our government needs to start a counter chinese poon program to supply all our geeks with free chinese poon. This way their desires will be satiated and the chinese spies will have no effect.

So some manner of government funded Asian call girl company? Wonder what department that comes under?


The Counter Infiltrating Asians dept.
 
2013-03-21 07:09:14 AM
Hang him.  Shoot her.
 
2013-03-21 07:12:53 AM

The Muthaship: Hang him.  Shoot her.


Thank you, Judge Dredd.
 
2013-03-21 07:19:36 AM

The Muthaship: Hang him.  Shoot her.


Hang him. Have her bathed and brought to my chambers.
 
2013-03-21 07:21:19 AM
There's no possible way he didn't know what was going on.
 
2013-03-21 07:26:36 AM

Teknowaffle: You know, this whole Asian fetish that is so popularized in the geek subset could really come to the advantage of the Chinese. They could start pumping out Asian porn aimed at the geeks, and make an Asian girl the most desirable thing for a geeky teenager.

Then, when geeky teenagers grow and start working in defense and engineering, the Chinese send over thousands of oriental honey-pots to seduce secrets out of them.


But, won't they be totally confused when they find out that Asian women's genitals aren't really pixelated like in all the porn? Now, that'll be the only thing that turns them on, and the real unpixelated deal won't work on them!

/Seriously, what the hell is the point of producing porn only to censor out the important bits??
//It's like producing a slasher flick only to censor out any blood and gore...
 
2013-03-21 07:27:17 AM

Captain Swoop: "Things that don't make for appropriate pillow talk: Titan intercontinental ballistic missiles."

Actually, I think Titan ICBM's make perfectly appropriate pillow talk, since they were deactivated in the late 80's as an ICBM, and the space launch fleet was retired in 2005. And since, where ICBM's are concerned, it was one of the biggest, why not impress the ladies?

/least the author could do is spend a few seconds on Google to find some current examples to use...


Wasn't that a Northern Exposure episode?
 
2013-03-21 07:28:11 AM

rabidarmadillo24: This guy knew exactly what he was doing. He went out of his way to get answers for her. I'm guessing that he's kind of a fat guy that had never gotten any, and the thought of her going away was scary to him. Poor girl had to had to just lay back and think of China.


This.  Everyone gets a class on "if American women don't find you attractive, foreign women do not either.  If you are attractive to them, then it is probably because you have something they want." This guy knew exactly what he was doing, but he was thinking with the wrong head.

Teknowaffle: You know, this whole Asian fetish that is so popularized in the geek subset could really come to the advantage of the Chinese. They could start pumping out Asian porn aimed at the geeks, and make an Asian girl the most desirable thing for a geeky teenager.

Then, when geeky teenagers grow and start working in defense and engineering, the Chinese send over thousands of oriental honey-pots to seduce secrets out of them.


Duffle blog covered this already:   http://www.duffelblog.com/2012/06/chinese-hacker-complains-perverted- a merican-military/
 
2013-03-21 07:28:32 AM

RatMaster999: Sounds like an excitable boy...


I was getting Seger from that headline......maybe it's just the lack of caffeine.

"But your thoughts will soon be wandering
The way they always do
When you're ridin' sixteen hours
And there's nothin' much to do "
 
2013-03-21 07:30:47 AM
YELLOW FEVER!

And just in keeping with the musical theme Bowie's My Little China Girl would also work.
 
2013-03-21 07:31:19 AM

ChubbyTiger: The Muthaship: Hang him.  Shoot her.

Hang him. Have her bathed and brought to my chambers.


Too cruel.
 
2013-03-21 07:42:20 AM
Picture here.

Not fat, but aging. Hot Chinese ass half is age is a helluva drug.
 
2013-03-21 07:47:05 AM

HotWingConspiracy: Picture here.

Not fat, but aging. Hot Chinese ass half is age is a helluva drug.


I think that's an attorney in that pic.  No way that's a 27 year old.
 
2013-03-21 07:53:24 AM

Alphax: HotWingConspiracy: Picture here.

Not fat, but aging. Hot Chinese ass half is age is a helluva drug.

I think that's an attorney in that pic.  No way that's a 27 year old.


If you're referring to the woman in the 2nd pic, yes, that's a US Attorney. His picture is above that.
 
2013-03-21 07:54:42 AM
I see the BIG BANG THEORY has already been referenced, so here is are pictures of Kaley Cuoco & Asia Carerra as place  holders:

www.magxone.com <img data-cke-saved-src="http://www.peoples.r" alt="http://www.peoples.rwww.peoples.ru" alt="www.peoples.ru/art/cinema/actor/asia_carrera/carrera_2.jpg">">
 
2013-03-21 08:05:54 AM

Sonneillon: It's worse than I originally thought, I expected Howard Wolowitz but a quick checked it turns out he's 59. At some point you'd really need to ask yourself why is this foreign national half my age asking me questions about my country's defences?

/Let's hope the sex was good.


Boneheaded actions like this seem to happen with older, "seasoned" professionals way more than you'd expect. I can only conclude that at that age you may be perfectly aware of the risks but you just don't give a shiat. Even if you have a family, the kids are probably grown up, college and house are paid for, and the marriage died a long time ago. Not much time left, and not much left to protect.
 
2013-03-21 08:18:01 AM

HotWingConspiracy: Alphax: HotWingConspiracy: Picture here.

Not fat, but aging. Hot Chinese ass half is age is a helluva drug.

I think that's an attorney in that pic.  No way that's a 27 year old.

If you're referring to the woman in the 2nd pic, yes, that's a US Attorney. His picture is above that.


Ah, I thought you were referring to the woman.
 
2013-03-21 08:42:30 AM

johnnygew: [images.wikia.com image 401x224]
Okay, so she was North Korean - but the idea was the same.
And who would have said no?


Certainly not me, I have Yellow Fever.

/lawyers, guns, blah blah blah
 
2013-03-21 08:48:56 AM

Herr Morgenstern: Really? The guy's name is Benjamin Pierce and no one makes a M*A*S*H joke? I am disappointed.


You sound old.
 
2013-03-21 08:50:27 AM
I read in an article that she took him to Lee Ho Fook's.
 
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