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(Gawker)   "Axe body spray has the same effect as nerve gas"   (gawker.com) divider line 148
    More: Obvious, adverse effect, Unilever  
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14948 clicks; posted to Main » on 20 Mar 2013 at 10:44 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-03-20 08:27:20 PM
While I would not disagree with Axe being a cheap stench, some people are just highly sensitive to perfumes and colognes.
 
2013-03-20 08:42:09 PM
img825.imageshack.us
 
2013-03-20 09:26:59 PM
Axe of terror?
 
2013-03-20 09:33:05 PM
img.gawkerassets.com
AXE!  Cause if you have to look at me at least you don't have to smell me.
 
2013-03-20 09:36:56 PM

basemetal: While I would not disagree with Axe being a cheap stench, some people are just highly sensitive to perfumes and colognes.


My gf is. She can't walk by an Abercrombie and Finch or a fellow co-worker with perfume on without having an attack. Just farking take a shower, why do you have to smell like crazy shiat?
 
2013-03-20 09:59:13 PM
People who wear cologne should be shot.

I'm not particularly sensitive to it, it just all smells horrible.
 
2013-03-20 10:13:02 PM

basemetal: While I would not disagree with Axe being a cheap stench, some people are just highly sensitive to perfumes and colognes.


You're not supposed to cover yourself in it, anyway, regardless of what the directions say.

My 11 year old daughter bought me an Axe travel set for Xmas last year, so every time I see her, I'm expected to smell like it. ugh.
 
2013-03-20 10:17:16 PM
I tried it once, on myself and WOOOOOOAAAAAAHHHHH WOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!! I don't think it had any effect on me.  WOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!! BIG DOGS!!! BIG DOGS!!!! LANDING ON MY FACE!!!! WOOOOOOOAAAAAHHHHHH!!!! WHHHHEEEEEWWWWWW!!!! I don't really know what that means...
 
2013-03-20 10:48:19 PM
neither gets me laid?
 
2013-03-20 10:49:03 PM
Mmm, sexy sexy nerve gas.
 
2013-03-20 10:49:12 PM

ekdikeo4: basemetal: While I would not disagree with Axe being a cheap stench, some people are just highly sensitive to perfumes and colognes.

You're not supposed to cover yourself in it, anyway, regardless of what the directions say.

My 11 year old daughter bought me an Axe travel set for Xmas last year, so every time I see her, I'm expected to smell like it. ugh.


Father of the Year
 
2013-03-20 10:49:46 PM
That seems a little harsh.  Some nerve gas is odorless.
 
2013-03-20 10:53:02 PM
dilbert.com

dilbert.com

dilbert.com
 
2013-03-20 10:53:36 PM
Syria is at the local wal-mart with a cart full of that shiat.
 
2013-03-20 10:53:40 PM
Is this a joke about Israeli guys?
 
2013-03-20 10:55:14 PM
A little bit of that stuff goes a long way.  I just spray a bit on after lunch so I don't stink up the place with my gross hairy fat man glands.
 
2013-03-20 10:56:49 PM
Maybe the kids would stop spritzing it if you Axed nicely.
 
2013-03-20 10:58:04 PM
What does Axe smell like? High carbon steel? What next? Rake? Garden Hoe? Plow?
 
2013-03-20 10:59:14 PM
meh. I smell like an old ashtray mixed with desperation
 
2013-03-20 10:59:43 PM
The only thing as hideous is drakkar noir....By GUIDO LA ROACH
 
2013-03-20 11:00:31 PM

flamingboar: A little bit of that stuff goes a long way.  I just spray a bit on after lunch so I don't stink up the place with my gross hairy fat man glands.


I would rather smell a sweaty man than that god awful Ax Body Funk. It makes me start coughing and gagging. You may as well roll in excrement. It couldn't be more repellent to women.
 
2013-03-20 11:01:04 PM

ekdikeo4: You're not supposed to cover yourself in it, anyway, regardless of what the directions say.


We have a customer who must bathe in the shiat, my padawan was applying a spray on poly finish and I swear I could smell him over the poly even before he entered the room.
 
2013-03-20 11:01:22 PM
Oh stanky perfumed body odor.... I try to guess which skank or skunk a block ahead of me is the purveyor of the stink.

/Worse when you get in a elevator and then decide to take the stairs instead.

/Remember the phrase,,, , , , ,Skunkfume. Or start pondering very loudly, where the skunk smell is coming from.
//At the worst, I have fart to displace the perfume smell of the perfumy product
 
2013-03-20 11:01:27 PM
I dont care what anyone says, Axe Instinct was nice stuff.
 
2013-03-20 11:01:34 PM
The effect I was going for was chloroform not nerve gas
 
2013-03-20 11:01:48 PM
My friend's younger brother bought into the hype of those dumbass commercials where the entire girl's swim team comes running when you spray that stuff on. He emptied an entire bottle on himself before strutting into the room to try and impress us.

You should have seen the look on his face when we all gagged while telling him he smelled funkier than a high school gym locker in the middle of the semester.
 
2013-03-20 11:01:52 PM
My kid wore it when he was in high school.  I made him put it on in the garage.  CSB, but at least it was short.

The odor of Axe is heavier than this submission's merits.  Nice green light,  mods.
 
2013-03-20 11:02:31 PM
Careful with that Axe, Eugene.
 
2013-03-20 11:03:45 PM
sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net
 
2013-03-20 11:03:50 PM
I stayed at my sisters house a few weeks ago.My nephew had
AXE body wash.I couldnt get home fast enough.I gotta chat with
him and tell him he is the 4th stinkiest thing i have ever smelled.

/I was the the 3rd.
 
2013-03-20 11:04:00 PM

flamingboar: A little bit of that stuff goes a long way.  I just spray a bit on after lunch so I don't stink up the place with my gross hairy fat man glands.


I don't think you get how this works.
 
2013-03-20 11:04:10 PM

findthefish: The only thing as hideous is drakkar noir....By GUIDO LA ROACH


dayum, they still make that?
 
2013-03-20 11:06:06 PM
So axe body spray can kill Jews
 
2013-03-20 11:07:07 PM

Mija: flamingboar: A little bit of that stuff goes a long way.  I just spray a bit on after lunch so I don't stink up the place with my gross hairy fat man glands.

I would rather smell a sweaty man than that god awful Ax Body Funk. It makes me start coughing and gagging. You may as well roll in excrement. It couldn't be more repellent to women.


Actually...I clean toilets at work, so I'm caked in poo constantly.
 
2013-03-20 11:11:56 PM
Best Cologne Ever: Avatar by Coty
 
2013-03-20 11:13:45 PM
Some of the Axe shower gels smell kinda nice.  I found that if you make a 1:10 mix of Axe with the generic SoftSoap showergel knockoff from CVS it makes the Axe scent properly diluted, and it actually smells good.  ( I tried this with the one green lettering that had a piney-citrusy scent...I don't know if it would work with other varieties).

I think their main problem is the concentration of the scent...it's just too strong.

/I still think Polo smells like ass.
 
2013-03-20 11:14:19 PM

Lionel Mandrake: People who wear cologne should be shot.

I'm not particularly sensitive to it, it just all smells horrible.


It's people who wear cologne wrong.  I was never a cologne guy but a gal bought me some that I thought smelled pretty good.  Took some trial and error but I found that if I could smell it ten minutes after I put it on, then I'd put too much on.  Basically half a spritz was enough to not offend bystanders and still please the woman.  I think when you smell someone's cologne from a distance, they think if they can't smell it then they didn't put enough on.
 
2013-03-20 11:27:01 PM

Pointy Tail of Satan: What does Axe smell like? High carbon steel? What next? Rake? Garden Hoe? Plow?


It smells like douchebag.
 
2013-03-20 11:31:31 PM
Is Axe body wash okay?

Not that I use that or anything..

Okay, I do.. It smells good..
 
2013-03-20 11:32:02 PM
It exists so you can smell a douche far enough away to avoid him.
 
2013-03-20 11:33:42 PM
Having walked into a locker room after a bunch of middle-schoolers changed out, I'm inclined to agree. Made my eyes leak.
 
2013-03-20 11:34:12 PM

Bonzo_1116: Some of the Axe shower gels smell kinda nice.  I found that if you make a 1:10 mix of Axe with the generic SoftSoap showergel knockoff from CVS it makes the Axe scent properly diluted, and it actually smells good.  ( I tried this with the one green lettering that had a piney-citrusy scent...I don't know if it would work with other varieties).

I think their main problem is the concentration of the scent...it's just too strong.

/I still think Polo smells like ass.


I didn't think anybody older than 13 wore that crap. Sadly I am wrong.
 
2013-03-20 11:34:46 PM

mamoru: I tried it once, on myself and WOOOOOOAAAAAAHHHHH WOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!! I don't think it had any effect on me.  WOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!! BIG DOGS!!! BIG DOGS!!!! LANDING ON MY FACE!!!! WOOOOOOOAAAAAHHHHHH!!!! WHHHHEEEEEWWWWWW!!!! I don't really know what that means...


Still farking lol @ that Robin Williams bit. There is no proof that WHOOOOOOAAAAAA BIG DOG! BIG DOG!
 
2013-03-20 11:38:06 PM
I really used to hate people who would douse themselves in cheap spray deodorant in high school. What the fark is the matter with those people? Why don't you just have a shower for God's sake?
 
2013-03-20 11:39:21 PM
For me, it's not the fragrance, it's the propellant/carrier of the fragrance.  Something about the volatile part of the stuff gives me a bad reaction, until it evaporates.  When I do use any cologne myself, I use very,very little, or if it's a spray, a light spritz on my shirt, and leave it alone until I'm ready to put it on, so I don't get all wheezy in the meantime.
 
2013-03-20 11:40:16 PM
Well, if you can think of a better way for me to land hot girls with daddy issues, I'm listening.

/Prefer "Euphoria" by Calvin Klein myself.
 
2013-03-20 11:42:09 PM
60% of the time, it works every time.
 
2013-03-20 11:43:19 PM

flamingboar: Mija: flamingboar: A little bit of that stuff goes a long way.  I just spray a bit on after lunch so I don't stink up the place with my gross hairy fat man glands.

I would rather smell a sweaty man than that god awful Ax Body Funk. It makes me start coughing and gagging. You may as well roll in excrement. It couldn't be more repellent to women.

Actually...I clean toilets at work, so I'm caked in poo constantly.


Man you are farkin slayin' me. Bet you got the chicks dripping off you. Or is it poo?

Seriously that shiat was funny!
 
2013-03-20 11:43:39 PM

Bucky Katt: That seems a little harsh.  Some nerve gas is odorless.


Some nerve gas has antidotes.
 
2013-03-20 11:47:13 PM
I'm an Old Spice man myself, but I use the Axe sprays every once in a while because it's alcohol based and it does wonders for getting rid of that armpit smell that 20 minutes of scrubbing won't
 
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