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(ABC 27)   After countless hours of research, the most dangerous driving distraction is.......kids   (abc27.com) divider line 21
    More: Obvious, Connie Seversen, WHTM, ABC World News  
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3001 clicks; posted to Main » on 20 Mar 2013 at 1:07 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Archived thread
2013-03-20 01:01:53 PM  
4 votes:

bdub77: Have I covered all the bases?


None of the snark changes the fact that kids just plain used to behave better in public, because their parents weren't indulgent hipster jagoffs who let the tiny assholes get away with bloody murder. Kids acting up and pitching tantrums in public used to be a shocking rarity.
2013-03-20 01:28:30 PM  
3 votes:

bdub77: OMG people have different parental styles.


Yes. And if your "parenting style" includes completely ignoring your filth-streaked spawn as it runs at full speed around restaurants, emitting a sound so loud and grating that it should incur an OSHA workplace-safety review for the staff, then your "parenting style" is known as "The Wrong One."
2013-03-20 12:43:10 PM  
3 votes:
Kid hating thread rules:

1) Whenever possible replace the word kid or child with 'crotchspawn'.
2) You were never a kid and your mother was never a whore for giving birth to you.
3) Relate story about one time a baby or toddler was bad on your flight because you f*cking paid $1000 to be crammed into a sardine can going 500mph and you can't be bothered to buy a nice $200 pair of noise cancelling headphones that will last you the rest of your life.
4) Alternate airplane horror story: some kid behind you kicked your seat, forcing you to relive memories of being in middle school.
5) Your relative has a child and they are fine - it's YOUR child that is the problem.
6) Kids should be beaten so they learn their lesson. You don't abuse your child that's why you fail as a parent.
7) Babies can't even eat by themselves or go to the bathroom without help what kind of bullsh*t is that?
8) Kids these days, all they do is listen to crappy pop music and Twitter sex messages. Why in my day...
9) Abortions are really cool and make an amazing sucking sound. I got one so should you and...hold on I have to cry for a few minutes...
10) My life is awesome because I don't have them.
11) Kids are horrible investments.
12) People with kids are less happy.
13) Stop sharing your life with your children with us.
14) Overpopulation blah blah blah and f*ck adoption.

Have I covered all the bases?
BHK
2013-03-20 10:34:33 PM  
2 votes:
Being a motorcyclist, my worst fear is a minivan driven by a soccer mom with multiple children. They are the most erratic drivers of all.
2013-03-20 02:04:44 PM  
2 votes:
i.imgur.com
2013-03-20 01:19:09 PM  
2 votes:

MaxxLarge: bdub77: Have I covered all the bases?

None of the snark changes the fact that kids just plain used to behave better in public, because their parents weren't indulgent hipster jagoffs who let the tiny assholes get away with bloody murder. Kids acting up and pitching tantrums in public used to be a shocking rarity.


No they didn't.  It's the same damn complaint every farking generation.  "Kids these days!!!"

Kids have always misbehaved in public.
2013-03-20 01:17:15 PM  
2 votes:
I put on the DVD to entertain them, give them snacks and drinks, and tell them to let me drive in peace unless they are puking, bleeding or choking.  Back in the 80s, my mom would just somehow dislocate her shoulder, swing her ninja arm into the back seat of our station wagon, and manage to smack all three of us upside the head without looking.
2013-03-21 01:32:59 AM  
1 votes:
And yet, your insurance rates go DOWN when you have kids.

WTF?
2013-03-20 05:18:18 PM  
1 votes:

MaxxLarge: bdub77: Have I covered all the bases?

None of the snark changes the fact that kids just plain used to behave better in public, because their parents weren't indulgent hipster jagoffs who let the tiny assholes get away with bloody murder. Kids acting up and pitching tantrums in public used to be a shocking rarity.


cant remember how many times i saw kids getting spanked on the cereal isle in the grocery. now the parents would be tazed and arrested and the kid made a ward of the state , for its own good.
2013-03-20 03:11:59 PM  
1 votes:

Carousel Beast: meat0918: MaxxLarge: bdub77: Have I covered all the bases?

None of the snark changes the fact that kids just plain used to behave better in public, because their parents weren't indulgent hipster jagoffs who let the tiny assholes get away with bloody murder. Kids acting up and pitching tantrums in public used to be a shocking rarity.

No they didn't.  It's the same damn complaint every farking generation.  "Kids these days!!!"

Kids have always misbehaved in public.

No they haven't.

/You sound like a child


I stand by my statement that kids have always misbehaved in public at times, and I say that because every older generation has the common complaint of "the kids today suck" and lamented that they are all horrible little shiats with bad parents.  It is as common as complaining about taxes.

Well, these new parents had parents of their own, so maybe some of the blame lies with grandma and grandpa too.

And I say this as a parent that has taken their kids out of a store before and made them sit in the car crying and pleading to go back in while mom finishes up shopping.  Now all I have to do is cite that as a reminder, and they rethink their behavior.
2013-03-20 02:59:54 PM  
1 votes:
Confucious say while children in backseat can cause accidents, accidents in back seat may also cause children.
2013-03-20 01:48:56 PM  
1 votes:

bdub77: Kid hating thread rules:

1) Whenever possible replace the word kid or child with 'crotchspawn'.
2) You were never a kid and your mother was never a whore for giving birth to you.
3) Relate story about one time a baby or toddler was bad on your flight because you f*cking paid $1000 to be crammed into a sardine can going 500mph and you can't be bothered to buy a nice $200 pair of noise cancelling headphones that will last you the rest of your life.
4) Alternate airplane horror story: some kid behind you kicked your seat, forcing you to relive memories of being in middle school.
5) Your relative has a child and they are fine - it's YOUR child that is the problem.
6) Kids should be beaten so they learn their lesson. You don't abuse your child that's why you fail as a parent.
7) Babies can't even eat by themselves or go to the bathroom without help what kind of bullsh*t is that?
8) Kids these days, all they do is listen to crappy pop music and Twitter sex messages. Why in my day...
9) Abortions are really cool and make an amazing sucking sound. I got one so should you and...hold on I have to cry for a few minutes...
10) My life is awesome because I don't have them.
11) Kids are horrible investments.
12) People with kids are less happy.
13) Stop sharing your life with your children with us.
14) Overpopulation blah blah blah and f*ck adoption.

Have I covered all the bases?


Nailed me perfect on #10
2013-03-20 01:46:14 PM  
1 votes:
Can we just get automated cars already. A lot of problems get solved by taking the human out of the equation

I long for the day I can jump in my car tell it where i want to go and just go to sleep or whatever. get out and tell it to go find a spot. Tell it to come pick you up when your ready etc

No more DUIs for folks to worry about, traffic tickets thing of the past etc etc, people going the wrong way down streets

Basically a couch with wheels and a brain
2013-03-20 01:34:03 PM  
1 votes:
1. High school girls at fundraiser car washes.

i.imgur.com

2. The Oscar Meyer Weinermobile.

i.imgur.com
2013-03-20 01:28:06 PM  
1 votes:

Phil Moskowitz: That's why you scream at them with a viciousness that makes them pee.


Works for me and I don't even have any.
2013-03-20 01:24:33 PM  
1 votes:
news.providencejournal.com
Worse than kids
2013-03-20 01:21:31 PM  
1 votes:
Obviously we need to ban Kids on the road...

/Or just ban kids, period..
2013-03-20 01:16:44 PM  
1 votes:

MaxxLarge: bdub77: Have I covered all the bases?

None of the snark changes the fact that kids just plain used to behave better in public, because their parents weren't indulgent hipster jagoffs who let the tiny assholes get away with bloody murder. Kids acting up and pitching tantrums in public used to be a shocking rarity.


Yep.  An extension of the "it's oppression to make anyone follow rules" attitude.
2013-03-20 01:15:06 PM  
1 votes:
See, Dad?? You're supposed to PULL THE CAR OVER before you turn all the way around to face the back seat, let go of the wheel, and start reaching around for a kid to whack.

/by the grace of God we survived childhood
//yeah, we usually deserved the whacking
///not me...
////definitely my brothers though
//brats, they were
2013-03-20 01:15:00 PM  
1 votes:

MaxxLarge: bdub77: Have I covered all the bases?

None of the snark changes the fact that kids just plain used to behave better in public, because their parents weren't indulgent hipster jagoffs who let the tiny assholes get away with bloody murder. Kids acting up and pitching tantrums in public used to be a shocking rarity.


or is it that now if you physically discipline a kid in public you are apt to be arrested for abuse?
2013-03-20 12:14:42 PM  
1 votes:
So, wait...let me get this straight: Having a sticky, shrieking, incontinent, Goldfish-cracker-dust-covered rug-ape bounding unescured around the back of a mini-van, obstructing your view, hearing and attention while you try to navigate dense traffic is regarded as "dangerous?"

Shet mah mouf.
 
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