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(KAIT Jonesboro)   Police: Attack 'victim' admits whole thing was fabricated just to impress his date   (kait8.com) divider line 34
    More: Asinine, Siegels, Jonesboro, pavilions, CROWLEY, Detective Mike Branscum, TJ Lane  
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6271 clicks; posted to Main » on 20 Mar 2013 at 11:28 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



34 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-03-20 11:31:11 AM  
Yo ladiezzzz.  I juz gots my ayass whooped.  Y'all want deez nutz?  EIP, biatchiz.
 
2013-03-20 11:32:47 AM  
Best laid plans of an 8 year old....
 
2013-03-20 11:33:25 AM  
encrypted-tbn1.gstatic.com

NOT AMUSED
 
2013-03-20 11:34:08 AM  

Citrate1007: Best laid plans of an 8 year old....


I remember reading these plans in encyclopedia brown, ages ago.
 
2013-03-20 11:34:29 AM  
yeah, but did he get any?

/non-story w/out the deets.
 
2013-03-20 11:37:22 AM  
That read like a 'it's always sunny in philadelphia' story.
 
2013-03-20 11:37:43 AM  
Flight of the Conchords may not be the best place to look for dating advice.
 
2013-03-20 11:39:21 AM  
2.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-03-20 11:39:26 AM  

Coolfusis: Citrate1007: Best laid plans of an 8 year old....

I remember reading these plans in encyclopedia brown, ages ago.


WERE HIS GLASSES BROKEN.

This is important, people.
 
2013-03-20 11:42:29 AM  
Remember that 90's movie My Boyfriend's Back, where the kid gets his buddy to stage a robbery at the shop where some girl works so he can save the day and impress her?  Only a real robber shows up and kills the kid.  Then he comes back as a zombie and the girl falls in love with him.  I haven't thought about that shiat in forever, until I read this article.
 
2013-03-20 11:42:45 AM  

Elandriel: Coolfusis: Citrate1007: Best laid plans of an 8 year old....

I remember reading these plans in encyclopedia brown, ages ago.

WERE HIS GLASSES BROKEN.

This is important, people.


Ha, so a lot of people had that first thought besides me.

If only he hadn't put those glasses in his front pocket...
 
2013-03-20 11:44:44 AM  
"Nobody manipsmanates me" - Tawana Brawley
 
2013-03-20 11:45:08 AM  

Master Sphincter: [2.bp.blogspot.com image 600x320]


Hey you! Get your damned hands off of her!
 
2013-03-20 11:46:19 AM  
FTFA:

"She also said that what Siegel had done "was not very heroic.""

Well excuss me princess, next time he will make sure his life really is in danger. Geez.
 
2013-03-20 11:46:36 AM  

Farce-Side: [encrypted-tbn1.gstatic.com image 299x168]

NOT AMUSED


Fun fact, when the crew heard Allen's head smack against the pavement like a raw steak, and he didn't move, they thought "oh god, we killed Allen Covert"
 
2013-03-20 11:48:17 AM  

WhyKnot: FTFA:

"She also said that what Siegel had done "was not very heroic.""

Well excuss me princess, next time he will make sure his life really is in danger. Geez.


*excuse
 
2013-03-20 11:49:32 AM  

Crewmannumber6: Master Sphincter: [2.bp.blogspot.com image 600x320]

Hey you! Get your damned hands off of her!


I love how he let's an almost inaudible "ohh" as in "oh shiat" as soon as he realizes it's Biff
 
2013-03-20 11:50:19 AM  

Coolfusis: Citrate1007: Best laid plans of an 8 year old....

I remember reading these plans in encyclopedia brown, ages ago.


His glasses didn't break.

HIS GLASSES DIDN'T BREAK!!!
 
2013-03-20 11:50:24 AM  
apostrophes are hard to use
 
2013-03-20 11:50:42 AM  
Oh, great, now every time there's a story of some guy getting attacked on Fark we're going to have idiots coming out of the woodwork to point out that sometimes people lie so we shouldn't bother caring or discussing it, and really if it did happen he was probably asking for it anyway.

/Right?  That's how that works, right?
 
2013-03-20 11:52:33 AM  
<csb>
My wife did this...

When I started dating my wife I fell in love instantly but was acting all cool about it with our friends, in order not to sound completely desperate I started saying things like "yeah she is nice, but she is such a pushover...".  Word got back to her and she actually staged a fight with another girl in front of me and she actually got the other girl a bloody nose... Needless to say, I knew I would marry her one day.

Didn't find out the fight was staged until after we got married.
</csb>
 
2013-03-20 11:53:18 AM  

Master Sphincter: Crewmannumber6: Master Sphincter: [2.bp.blogspot.com image 600x320]

Hey you! Get your damned hands off of her!

I love how he let's an almost inaudible "ohh" as in "oh shiat" as soon as he realizes it's Biff


You need an actor who is truly as bizarre as Chrispin Glover to get a performance that nuanced.
 
2013-03-20 11:54:17 AM  

LowbrowDeluxe: That's how that works, right?


No, you're thinking of rape.
 
2013-03-20 11:56:02 AM  

Farce-Side: LowbrowDeluxe: That's how that works, right?

No, you're thinking of rape.


Rape is terrible, so are false allegations of rape.
 
2013-03-20 12:01:00 PM  

spicorama: <csb>
My wife did this...

When I started dating my wife I fell in love instantly but was acting all cool about it with our friends, in order not to sound completely desperate I started saying things like "yeah she is nice, but she is such a pushover...".  Word got back to her and she actually staged a fight with another girl in front of me and she actually got the other girl a bloody nose... Needless to say, I knew I would marry her one day.

Didn't find out the fight was staged until after we got married.
</csb>


Does it still work?  I love you dearly, it's just that...I never have an open beer placed into my hand when I need one...
 
2013-03-20 12:04:37 PM  

WhyKnot: Farce-Side: LowbrowDeluxe: That's how that works, right?

No, you're thinking of rape.

Rape is terrible, so are false allegations of rape.


I completely agree.  Someone should inform the rest of Fark.
 
2013-03-20 12:09:15 PM  

Farce-Side: WhyKnot: Farce-Side: LowbrowDeluxe: That's how that works, right?

No, you're thinking of rape.

Rape is terrible, so are false allegations of rape.

I completely agree.  Someone should inform the rest of Fark.


I think we just did.

*fist bump*
 
2013-03-20 12:33:54 PM  
Oh what a tangled web we weave,
Trying to impress some beave.
 
2013-03-20 12:43:43 PM  

mike_d85: Oh what a tangled web we weave,
Trying to impress some beave.


noice.  yours?  I wish to purloin it.
 
2013-03-20 02:39:26 PM  
s3.postimage.org
 
2013-03-20 02:40:28 PM  

LeroyBourne: That read like a 'it's always sunny in philadelphia' story.


"I thought if I faked a mugging and defended her it'd improve my chances with her, ya know, because of the implication."
 
2013-03-20 03:26:35 PM  
Someone watches too much Curb...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ro_6XGIjfkU
 
2013-03-20 03:27:07 PM  
Pretty sure this was a sketch on "Robot Chicken".    "That explains why Scarlett Johansen had a giant 'johansen'!!"
 
2013-03-20 03:50:57 PM  
This was an episode of Monk.
 
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