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(ABC)   Yo dawg, I heard you like ballerinas so I put a brothel in your ballet so she can grand plié on your grand petard   (abcnews.go.com) divider line 34
    More: Unlikely, Yo Dawg, ballerinas, petard, Bolshoi, ballets, acid attacks, financiers  
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6473 clicks; posted to Main » on 20 Mar 2013 at 8:23 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



34 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-03-20 08:26:27 AM  
In Russia? I am shocked. Completely.
 
2013-03-20 08:26:43 AM  
Just be careful with the word "Nutcracker." And a "Swan Lake" will cost you extra.
 
2013-03-20 08:28:24 AM  
I could learn to love Ballet.
 
2013-03-20 08:29:09 AM  
I am Jack's complete lack of  surprise.
 
2013-03-20 08:30:35 AM  
That's nothing.

There used to be an Amish brothel about 20 minutes from where I work.  The reason it's gone is Fark worthy.  They all got pregnant.
 
2013-03-20 08:30:42 AM  
That explains their new motto, "We put the ball in ballet."
 
2013-03-20 08:32:57 AM  
Hold me closer tiny dancer.
 
2013-03-20 08:35:28 AM  
Yeah baby.. let me see you move into second position... a la seconde, ooooh I'd hit that croise derriere...
 
2013-03-20 08:42:43 AM  

The Muthaship: That's nothing.

There used to be an Amish brothel about 20 minutes from where I work.  The reason it's gone is Fark worthy.  They all got pregnant.


I was going to facepalm until I realized that was probably the point of the brothel in the first place.
 
2013-03-20 08:43:50 AM  
I've got an idea for black swan 2.
 
2013-03-20 08:45:54 AM  
citizenfable.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-03-20 08:52:50 AM  
i would be interested in seeing any photographic evidence for further bunk study.
 
2013-03-20 08:54:13 AM  
What? Too early for a ballerina/gymnast/contortionist/Russian hottie thread?

I didn't realize FARK had standards.

/they let me in after all
 
mhd
2013-03-20 08:54:16 AM  
From her Wikipedia Page:

After leaving the Bolshoi Theater she was involved in many media scandals on her private life and political activity. She is one of pro-Kremlin public figures called for a severe punishment for a severe punishment for Pussy Riot female punk band.

So why I wouldn't be surprised, some AW'ing might be involved too.

/sweet, NSFW scandal
 
2013-03-20 09:03:11 AM  
It's not like they were making any other contribution to the world.
 
2013-03-20 09:05:16 AM  
So that would explain why straight guys would go to ballets and use the binoculars, they were shopping.
 
2013-03-20 09:06:02 AM  
I thought it was fairly well known that brothels and ballet have gone hand in hand pretty much since always?
 
mhd
2013-03-20 09:27:40 AM  

lack of warmth: So that would explain why straight guys would go to ballets and use the binoculars, they were shopping.


I kinda liked Bunheads.
 
2013-03-20 09:39:47 AM  
Yeah....  I thought this was one of most commonly known "secrets" about the Bolshoi.
 
2013-03-20 09:58:29 AM  
grand plié, ffs.
 
2013-03-20 10:05:46 AM  

brimed03: What? Too early for a ballerina/gymnast/contortionist/Russian hottie thread?

I didn't realize FARK had standards.

/they let me in after all


Someone mentioned Black Swan but all the Natalie Portman pics from that movie sucked.  So I went with standard Portman.

images.askmen.com
 
2013-03-20 10:18:40 AM  
I could start with a billion dollars and go broke in a year with a Russian ballet brothel.

/dated a ballerina in high school
//ruined for other women forever
 
2013-03-20 10:53:11 AM  
In other news, Donations to Ballet companies up 4000%.
 
2013-03-20 11:11:15 AM  

starrion: In other news, Donations to Ballet companies up 4000%.


... sperm donations.
 
2013-03-20 11:29:25 AM  

Mr Guy: I thought it was fairly well known that brothels and ballet have gone hand in hand pretty much since always?


they were a favorite of the tzars. the bolshoi has been a brothel for its wealthy donors since its inception. but i would hesitate to say it was a brothel like say the las vegas places we typically thing of these days. it was more like a sugar daddy service for the russian elites.
 
2013-03-20 11:44:58 AM  

starrion: In other news, Donations to Ballet companies up 4000%.


Attendance as well.
 
2013-03-20 11:56:33 AM  
I am donating to the wrong ballet company.

There's nothing like a ballerina. They are so incredibly flexible you can try almost any position imaginable, and they are athletic enough to pound you to a very happy death.
 
2013-03-20 12:17:32 PM  
So, Russia... how is that capitalism thing working out for ya?
 
2013-03-20 01:31:20 PM  

mhd: From her Wikipedia Page:

After leaving the Bolshoi Theater she was involved in many media scandals on her private life and political activity. She is one of pro-Kremlin public figures called for a severe punishment for a severe punishment for Pussy Riot female punk band.

So why I wouldn't be surprised, some AW'ing might be involved too.

/sweet, NSFW scandal


Я бы ударил, что
 
2013-03-20 02:58:47 PM  
Ballet dancers - professional ballet dancers - are stupid, vain, self-obsessed to the point of egomania, biatchy and anorexic. They may well be good in bed, particularly if you like 'em crying, but they define the word "crazy" as in "don't stick your dick in".
 
2013-03-20 03:15:22 PM  
So, the Bolshoi is like a Russophonic Hollywood?
 
2013-03-20 03:16:19 PM  

the8re: Yeah baby.. let me see you move into second position... a la seconde, ooooh I'd hit that croise derriere...


---
LOL.

/Toumbe, pas de bourree, glissade assemble.....faille, assemble, faille assemble...
 
2013-03-20 04:40:22 PM  
Don't forget a set of funky looking feet from being on tip toes all the time while crammed into some weird set of shoes.
 
2013-03-20 04:55:35 PM  
...So I was with the headline until Petard. What do you think a petard is?
 
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