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(News.com.au)   To stay safe while on the job, Australian spies are required to wear bright yellow hi-viz clothing while operating under cover. Yes, Mr Bond, I expect you to die. Soon (possible Not safe for work content in sidebar)   (news.com.au) divider line 65
    More: Stupid, Australian Defence Force, Australians, safety vests, James Bond  
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11051 clicks; posted to Main » on 20 Mar 2013 at 2:08 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-03-20 02:09:03 AM
The Man With the Golden Vest
 
2013-03-20 02:09:20 AM
In other news, the Australians have spies.
 
2013-03-20 02:10:15 AM

Yogimus: In other news, the Australians have spies.


Not for long.
 
2013-03-20 02:15:45 AM

Yogimus: In other news, the Australians have spies.


Actually, this could work out well.

Get some of your people to wear bright yellow vests and be very obvious like kids' movie spies. Send your real spy in with a fake kiwi passport and have him mock them to gain the trust of the mark.
 
2013-03-20 02:15:47 AM

Yogimus: In other news, the Australians have spies.


Blah blah Israeli Aussie spy in news recently now dead blah blah

/drunk
//go go late start Wednesday
 
2013-03-20 02:19:00 AM
i136.photobucket.com

ORLY?
 
2013-03-20 02:19:22 AM

Yogimus: In other news, the Australians have spies.


Shows what I know. I thought they were construction crews.
 
2013-03-20 02:20:16 AM
In before 1.8 million American forces begin complaining about their PT, hi-vis belts.
 
2013-03-20 02:21:06 AM
I'm totally getting a yellow vest that says Austrian Spy on it!


Sooooo meta!
 
2013-03-20 02:21:13 AM

Yogimus: In other news, the Australians have spies.


They must be pretty good at their jobs. I mean, you didn't have a clue, right?
 
2013-03-20 02:24:24 AM
I'm having trouble finding a way that this article could have been more vague.  Espionage is white-collar work, it's not like these guys are hauling lumber and pouring concrete.  Are all Australians required to wear safety vests while sitting at a computer and running photocopies?  Are they required to do a safety dance during their lunch breaks?
 
2013-03-20 02:26:55 AM
encrypted-tbn1.gstatic.com

So baby, I've got a full goon bag and the Crows are playing the Bombers.  Get the leg over and make me sing Advance Australia Fair
 
2013-03-20 02:34:21 AM
This is in the same category as EU regulations requiring trapeze artists to wear helmets, fishermen to wear hairnets, and that bannanananannanannas not be too bendy.

Lies printed by a joker in the media to incense people with a "too much bloody regulation" fervor.

More Euro Bluffs
 
2013-03-20 02:35:46 AM

HotWingAgenda: I'm having trouble finding a way that this article could have been more vague.  Espionage is white-collar work, it's not like these guys are hauling lumber and pouring concrete.  Are all Australians required to wear safety vests while sitting at a computer and running photocopies?  Are they required to do a safety dance during their lunch breaks?


Only if they want to. And they're no friends of mine.
 
2013-03-20 02:38:27 AM

doglover: Yogimus: In other news, the Australians have spies.

Actually, this could work out well.

Get some of your people to wear bright yellow vests and be very obvious like kids' movie spies. Send your real spy in with a fake kiwi passport and have him mock them to gain the trust of the mark.


Implying that real kiwis aren't already doing all of the work yet.
 
2013-03-20 02:39:20 AM
i47.photobucket.com
 
2013-03-20 02:46:58 AM

jimworm: doglover: Yogimus: In other news, the Australians have spies.

Actually, this could work out well.

Get some of your people to wear bright yellow vests and be very obvious like kids' movie spies. Send your real spy in with a fake kiwi passport and have him mock them to gain the trust of the mark.

Implying that real kiwis aren't already doing all of the work yet.


Who could pull them off the sheep long enough?
 
2013-03-20 02:48:47 AM

Farxist Marxist: Yogimus: In other news, the Australians have spies.

They must be pretty good at their jobs. I mean, you didn't have a clue, right?


VALID POINT
 
2013-03-20 02:50:19 AM

HotWingAgenda: Espionage is white-collar work, it's not like these guys are hauling lumber and pouring concrete.


Yeah, that would make them Mafia.
 
2013-03-20 02:58:28 AM
If I had a spy organization, I would require them to wear bright  yellow clothing, leak that to the "print anything anyone tells us" media, then have the spies dress however the hell they want.
 
2013-03-20 03:04:29 AM
Look at the spies
See how they spy on you
And all the things that you do
They were all yellow
 
2013-03-20 03:13:46 AM
There's a list of Other Top Stories on the right panel of the page. Every headline could pass for an Onion article.
 
2013-03-20 03:14:11 AM

Bill_Wick's_Friend: Look at the spies
See how they spy on you
And all the things that you do
They were all yellow


This is about Australia, not China.

/going to hell
 
2013-03-20 03:15:08 AM

HotWingAgenda: Bill_Wick's_Friend: Look at the spies
See how they spy on you
And all the things that you do
They were all yellow

This is about Australia, not China.

/going to hell


You've obviously never been to Australia.
 
2013-03-20 03:15:36 AM

Notabunny: Yogimus: In other news, the Australians have spies.

Shows what I know. I thought they were construction crews.


And I thought the Village People were in town.
 
2013-03-20 03:21:57 AM

jimworm: Implying that real kiwis aren't already doing all of the work yet.


I've never heard of a farkin' kiwi doing any honest work.
 
2013-03-20 03:28:51 AM

wildcardjack: This is in the same category as EU regulations requiring trapeze artists to wear helmets, fishermen to wear hairnets, and that bannanananannanannas not be too bendy.

Lies printed by a joker in the media to incense people with a "too much bloody regulation" fervor.


Glad I am not the only one who came to that conclusion. I wouldn't trust a Murdoch publication as far as I could throw it, even if it were printed on material mined from the core of a black hole.
 
2013-03-20 03:35:57 AM
Remember that time the Soviets infiltrated our foreign security service, and we lost our privileged access to American intelligence because of it?

Good times.
 
2013-03-20 03:38:29 AM
Crikey!

simage1.sportsmansguide.com

Talk about yer not even remotely cold war mate!

I suppose they will be trying to infiltrate the terrorist cell who hideout here...

m7.i.pbase.com
 
2013-03-20 04:08:55 AM

Danger Avoid Death: HotWingAgenda: I'm having trouble finding a way that this article could have been more vague.  Espionage is white-collar work, it's not like these guys are hauling lumber and pouring concrete.  Are all Australians required to wear safety vests while sitting at a computer and running photocopies?  Are they required to do a safety dance during their lunch breaks?

Only if they want to. And they're no friends of mine.


But the good news is, they can go where they want to, a place where they will never find, so they'll be safe.
 
2013-03-20 04:09:24 AM
Oh hey, News.com.au showing complete bloody ignorance and misreading of workplace safety laws, oh hey, American posters not knowing about ASIO, oh hey, my own burning suppressed rage at existing in the shadow of a hegemonic superpower, oh hey drinking.
 
2013-03-20 04:10:26 AM
None of me cobbers on Danger 5 wear yellow.  And remember "Kill Hitler!"
 
2013-03-20 04:38:23 AM

HotWingAgenda: I'm having trouble finding a way that this article could have been more vague.  Espionage is white-collar work, it's not like these guys are hauling lumber and pouring concrete.  Are all Australians required to wear safety vests while sitting at a computer and running photocopies?  Are they required to do a safety dance during their lunch breaks?


It's probably something along the lines of: if you're outside and working, then you have to wear safety gear.
 
2013-03-20 04:38:43 AM

spamdog: Remember that time the Soviets infiltrated our foreign security service, and we lost our privileged access to American intelligence because of it?

Good times.


Oh comrade, you do drone on.

/U.S. forces give the nod.
 
2013-03-20 04:42:12 AM
As TalenLee points out, despite the stupid article it's not actually as if agents are wearing hi-viz, there's simply a bureaucratic fix being undertaken to make the existing situation comply with the letter of the legal requirements. It is hard to know whether Australia should be more embarrassed by its security agencies (the now-open files they kept on various left-wing artists, activists and celebrities in the 1960's make for hilarious and cringe-worthy reading) or the Murdoch media's News.com.au. I can tell you neither have much support over here.

In fact if you want a trifecta of Australian national embarrassment, ASIO, tabloids and Fosters are pretty much it, perhaps with Savage Garden bringing up a close forth.
 
2013-03-20 04:51:47 AM
It will come in handy if they get lost in the Alps.
 
2013-03-20 05:17:13 AM
With the way things are going, I'm wondering why I can't buy a bright yellow and orange tailored suit.  I sort of wonder why the uniforms in scifi shows aren't all high vis.
 
2013-03-20 05:18:09 AM

Aussie_As: whether Australia should be more embarrassed by its security agencies


Two ASIOnecdotes.

1. A friend of mine was trialled to work for ASIO as a cryptographer. They bounced him after the interview because his records and history matched his CV and interview too closely - they felt he was dangerously honest.

2. Another friend of mine wanted to check ASIO's history, so he looked them up in the phone book and called them. He was put through three people before they asked him how he had the phone number. It all culminated with a startled ASIO office worker saying, "Wait, we're in the farking phone book?"
 
2013-03-20 05:32:27 AM
We call them Moogly-dooglies.
 
2013-03-20 05:38:54 AM
I may be drunk, and I am, but if any honest Australian spies are actually conforming to this, then I'll be a monkey's farking uncle.
 
2013-03-20 06:01:31 AM
I think I will wear HI VIS yellow clothing around the New Zealand consulate...
 
2013-03-20 06:19:37 AM
Yeah because Intelligence Services are known for following the rules.
 
2013-03-20 06:39:17 AM

abhorrent1: Yeah because Intelligence Services are known for following the rules.


Umm, yeah, that's why the Government is uncontroversially tinkering with those same very rules so that the legislation will conform to the reality . It's actually a very unsexy story which a rubbish news site has tried to pretend is somehow interesting. If you read TFA, it actually never claims spooks are in fact wearing hi-viz, just that the rules as currently written don't exempt them. There is never any suggestion these rules are currently being enforced.

/or am I some sort of government agent and this is just what I want you to think?
 
2013-03-20 06:49:40 AM
www.global-air.com

Those movie spy plots aren't as far-fetched as you might think. (new window)
 
2013-03-20 07:16:48 AM
Finally.  Maybe now the numbskulls in Washington will realize that there are common-sense situations that require workplace safety laws to be ignored.  Overreaction should NOT play a role in governance.  But here we are in the year 2013 and we live in times where one seven-year old slips on the slaughterrhouse floor and the whole bloody thing gets shut down.  Where's the justice in that?!?

I say make em all wear yellow vests or repeal everything. NO MIDDLE GROUND!
 
2013-03-20 07:55:08 AM
What?  Was Fail tag being interrogated today?
 
2013-03-20 08:13:48 AM
Great, I've already got my Halloween costume for this year.
 
2013-03-20 08:16:00 AM
Another crazy useless law that will be impossible to enforce.  Well if they could enforce it with their spies, they should be fired anyway.
 
2013-03-20 08:20:55 AM
The US has done the same thing with Soldiers patroling in war zones.  High visibility vests over camoflage.
 
2013-03-20 08:41:08 AM

PanicMan: The US has done the same thing with Soldiers patroling in war zones.  High visibility vests over camoflage.


Have you ever looked at high vis yellow through a sniper scope?  Its like glare x1000.
 
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