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(Metro)   Would you drink a cup of coffee that had 200% more caffeine than your normal cuppa? If so, here's your "Death Wish" just in case you want to overdose   (metro.co.uk) divider line 139
    More: Spiffy, Death Wish  
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10828 clicks; posted to Main » on 19 Mar 2013 at 1:33 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



139 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread
 
2013-03-19 12:53:32 PM  
200 times? 200 percent? 200%, that's the amount of the Federal Budget that goes to PBS, right?

Listen to your doctor:

www.cvs.com


Step 1: Take a Caffeine tab if you want some caffeine. You'll get a consistent, known quantity that doesn't change depending on how fine the beans were ground or how hot the water is today.

Step 2: go down the street and get a tastey cup of coffee from your neighborhood indie coffee bar. Not that one, the one around the corner that doesn't suck.
 
2013-03-19 12:57:37 PM  
Double the caffeine, 200 times the caffeine, it's all the same
 
2013-03-19 01:01:52 PM  
Subby should switch to decaf
 
2013-03-19 01:03:45 PM  
I want!  My favorite coffee shop near me closed and I've been DYING for a replacement...
 
2013-03-19 01:14:31 PM  
200 times more is not equal to 200% more.

Subby must work for Verizon.
 
2013-03-19 01:14:51 PM  
Apparently subby has been living by the mantra of "I was told there would be no math" since 3rd grade.
 
2013-03-19 01:15:57 PM  
Although, making coffee that is only "Triple Strength" but using "200%" to trick people bad at math sounds like a good marketing ploy.
 
2013-03-19 01:16:09 PM  
And the shuttle is coming in HOW many times faster than the speed of light, submitter?
 
2013-03-19 01:19:57 PM  
And I am pretty sure 200 TIMES the amount of caffeine of a coffee at once WOULD actually be a death wish.   Wasn't there a story of some guy who OD'ed on caffeine powder and died recently?
 
2013-03-19 01:22:49 PM  

dletter: And I am pretty sure 200 TIMES the amount of caffeine of a coffee at once WOULD actually be a death wish.   Wasn't there a story of some guy who OD'ed on caffeine powder and died recently?


Yeah, if you drank the same amount of coffee with 200 times more caffeine, you probably would die of a caffeine OD.

But 200% more caffeine...meh.  That's just getting into the caffeine level of most energy drinks.
 
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2013-03-19 01:24:32 PM  
In college I drank Jolt Cola, "all the sugar and twice the caffeine." I doubt it did me much good relative to normal soda.
 
2013-03-19 01:30:24 PM  
Subby fails at percentages.
 
2013-03-19 01:35:42 PM  
This week on a very special episode of Saved By The Bell
 
2013-03-19 01:36:21 PM  
24.media.tumblr.com
Not impressed.
 
2013-03-19 01:36:30 PM  
Subby should switch to Remedial Math
 
2013-03-19 01:36:49 PM  
The word "cuppa" makes me want to punch noses.
 
2013-03-19 01:38:12 PM  
In answer to the question though - yes.  I would lap at it once, as that's about the caffeine equivalent of my current dose.
 
2013-03-19 01:38:18 PM  
200% more = 3 times as much = still much less than an espresso if brewed as a normal pot.
 
2013-03-19 01:38:37 PM  
COME AT ME BROS.
store.bbcomcdn.com
 
2013-03-19 01:39:02 PM  
Bad math aside, the marketing is stupid.

Scenario A:
#1  I think I'll have a cup of regular coffee.
#2  I think I'll join ya!

Scenario B:
#1  I think I'll have two cups of regular coffee.
#2  Are you effing crazy?!?!
 
2013-03-19 01:40:22 PM  
Wait, what? Two hundred times the caffeine? That's 200 cups of coffee at once. That is death in a cup.

200% of the caffeine? That's like adding a shot of espresso. At most you'll get a little jittery if you're not used to it.

Little difference there, I'd say.
 
2013-03-19 01:40:51 PM  
Just hook it to my veins!
 
2013-03-19 01:41:28 PM  
I drank 24 oz of soda once. I was up for three days.
 
2013-03-19 01:41:40 PM  

Louisiana_Sitar_Club: Bad math aside, the marketing is stupid.

Scenario A:
#1  I think I'll have a cup of regular coffee.
#2  I think I'll join ya!

Scenario B:
#1  I think I'll have two three cups of regular coffee.
#2  Are you effing crazy?!?!


FTFY
 
2013-03-19 01:42:30 PM  
Makes my colon quiver just considering
 
2013-03-19 01:43:03 PM  
What is the LD50 for caffeine anyway?
 
2013-03-19 01:44:39 PM  

farkingismybusiness: I drank 24 oz of soda once. I was up for three days.


Mayor Bloomberg?
 
2013-03-19 01:45:24 PM  
Considering the size of a 'large' coffee at a run of the mill drive thru coffee shop this isn't even a new thing they just reduced the water content, somewhat similar to espresso.
 
2013-03-19 01:45:31 PM  
Math is hard!
 
2013-03-19 01:46:34 PM  

lostcat: The word "cuppa" makes me want to punch noses.

 
2013-03-19 01:47:41 PM  

Treygreen13: Louisiana_Sitar_Club: Bad math aside, the marketing is stupid.

Scenario A:
#1  I think I'll have a cup of regular coffee.
#2  I think I'll join ya!

Scenario B:
#1  I think I'll have two three cups of regular coffee.
#2  Are you effing crazy?!?!

FTFY


Convert a percent to a decimal by dividing by 100.

(200% / 100 = 2)

The amount of caffeine in one cup of coffee multiplied by 2 is the amount of caffeine in two cups of coffee.
 
2013-03-19 01:48:47 PM  

karmaceutical: What is the LD50 for caffeine anyway?


From Wikipedia:

Extreme overdose can result in death.[69][70] The 50) given orally, is 192 milligrams per kilogram in rats. The LD50 of caffeine in humans is dependent on individual sensitivity, but is estimated to be about 150 to 200 milligrams per kilogram of body mass or roughly 80 to 100 cups of coffee for an average adult.[4]
 
2013-03-19 01:49:05 PM  
If you want caffeine, stay away from dark roasted coffee beans.


Roasting vaporizes caffeine out of the beans, which is why lighter roasted beans like breakfast blends will have more kick, but a lighter flavor.

Rule of thumb:  The darker the bean, the less the caffeine.
 
2013-03-19 01:49:57 PM  
Actually, most energy drinks have less caffeine in them than a small Starbucks coffee.

jake_lex: dletter: And I am pretty sure 200 TIMES the amount of caffeine of a coffee at once WOULD actually be a death wish.   Wasn't there a story of some guy who OD'ed on caffeine powder and died recently?

Yeah, if you drank the same amount of coffee with 200 times more caffeine, you probably would die of a caffeine OD.

But 200% more caffeine...meh.  That's just getting into the caffeine level of most energy drinks.

 
2013-03-19 01:50:40 PM  

Louisiana_Sitar_Club: Treygreen13: Louisiana_Sitar_Club: Bad math aside, the marketing is stupid.

Scenario A:
#1  I think I'll have a cup of regular coffee.
#2  I think I'll join ya!

Scenario B:
#1  I think I'll have two three cups of regular coffee.
#2  Are you effing crazy?!?!

FTFY

Convert a percent to a decimal by dividing by 100.

(200% / 100 = 2)

The amount of caffeine in one cup of coffee multiplied by 2 is the amount of caffeine in two cups of coffee.


If something has '200% more' caffeine it has 300% of the original amount.
 
2013-03-19 01:51:07 PM  
I take caffeine pills with my coffee sometimes if I want to wake up without having to consume the amount of coffee required to reach wakefulness.
 
2013-03-19 01:51:08 PM  

Alphakronik: If you want caffeine, stay away from dark roasted coffee beans.


Roasting vaporizes caffeine out of the beans, which is why lighter roasted beans like breakfast blends will have more kick, but a lighter flavor.

Rule of thumb:  The darker the bean, the less the caffeine.


Has more to do with the steep time doesn't it?
 
2013-03-19 01:51:28 PM  

Louisiana_Sitar_Club: Treygreen13: Louisiana_Sitar_Club: Bad math aside, the marketing is stupid.

Scenario A:
#1  I think I'll have a cup of regular coffee.
#2  I think I'll join ya!

Scenario B:
#1  I think I'll have two three cups of regular coffee.
#2  Are you effing crazy?!?!

FTFY

Convert a percent to a decimal by dividing by 100.

(200% / 100 = 2)

The amount of caffeine in one cup of coffee multiplied by 2 is the amount of caffeine in two cups of coffee.


Not sure if serious
 
2013-03-19 01:52:44 PM  
HOW CAN I GET THIS ADMINISTERED RECTALLY?
 
2013-03-19 01:53:17 PM  
Nothing new. Most of the gas stations around here have a coffeemaker with a double-the-caffeine variety in it.

Tastes nasty.
 
2013-03-19 01:53:40 PM  
Pile-on subtard who cain't do no math.  200% caffeine = 200 x caffeine.  100% = 100 times.  My penis is 100% of the average penis size, therefore it is likely to be 100 times bigger than yours.
 
2013-03-19 01:54:14 PM  
My friend Keith was a coder in the early '90s.

He once drank three six packs of Jolt over a 36-hour period while banging out a "Schoolhouse Rock" game before deadline.  That's the equivalent of 36 Cokes at a rate of one per hour.

This is the same man who once ate a whole wheel of cheese and a Swiss Colony Beef Log for lunch.  Casually.  As in, it's just what he had in the kitchen to bring with him that day.

Amazingly, he's not dead.  He found a woman to clean him up, make him healthy, and have a couple equally ingenious kids.  I miss that guy.  He won at life.

At his parties he would just serve gigantic bowls of meat.  That's it, just meat.
 
2013-03-19 01:54:30 PM  

karmaceutical: What is the LD50 for caffeine anyway?


<a href="http://www.energyfiend.com/death-by-caffeine">this much</a>
 
2013-03-19 01:54:39 PM  

lostcat: The word "cuppa" makes me want to punch noses.


Yeah, not sure why, but reading that word pisses me off.
 
2013-03-19 01:56:25 PM  

GlobalStrategic MapleSyrup Reserve: HOW CAN I GET THIS ADMINISTERED RECTALLY?


You're welcome.
 
2013-03-19 01:56:33 PM  

Louisiana_Sitar_Club: Treygreen13: Louisiana_Sitar_Club: Bad math aside, the marketing is stupid.

Scenario A:
#1  I think I'll have a cup of regular coffee.
#2  I think I'll join ya!

Scenario B:
#1  I think I'll have two three cups of regular coffee.
#2  Are you effing crazy?!?!

FTFY

Convert a percent to a decimal by dividing by 100.

(200% / 100 = 2)

The amount of caffeine in one cup of coffee multiplied by 2 is the amount of caffeine in two cups of coffee.


If the claim was "200% of your normal dose of caffeine" you'd be right. But it's not. It was "200% more than your normal dose of caffeine". So you start at 100% (one cup) then add another 200% (2 cups), for a total of 3 cups
 
2013-03-19 01:56:58 PM  
Good to know that my 3rd grader is smarter than a Fark subby.
 
2013-03-19 01:57:28 PM  

Parallax: At his parties he would just serve gigantic bowls of meat. That's it, just meat.


His name wouldn't happen to be Kowalski would it?
 
2013-03-19 01:58:12 PM  

FloridaAsshat: My penis is 100% of the average penis size, therefore it is likely to be 100 times bigger than yours.


This may be true no matter how bad subby's math is.
 
2013-03-19 02:00:30 PM  
I have a jar of pure, anhydrous caffeine in my kitchen. I use it to make old soda recipes.
It was really sobering to realize there was enough of it to quite literally kill a platoon of Marines.
 
2013-03-19 02:00:49 PM  

Parallax: My friend Keith was a coder in the early '90s.

He once drank three six packs of Jolt over a 36-hour period while banging out a "Schoolhouse Rock" game before deadline.  That's the equivalent of 36 Cokes at a rate of one per hour.

This is the same man who once ate a whole wheel of cheese and a Swiss Colony Beef Log for lunch.  Casually.  As in, it's just what he had in the kitchen to bring with him that day.

Amazingly, he's not dead.  He found a woman to clean him up, make him healthy, and have a couple equally ingenious kids.  I miss that guy.  He won at life.

At his parties he would just serve gigantic bowls of meat.  That's it, just meat.



Is this him?

encrypted-tbn1.gstatic.com
 
2013-03-19 02:01:22 PM  

karmaceutical: Alphakronik: If you want caffeine, stay away from dark roasted coffee beans.


Roasting vaporizes caffeine out of the beans, which is why lighter roasted beans like breakfast blends will have more kick, but a lighter flavor.

Rule of thumb:  The darker the bean, the less the caffeine.

Has more to do with the steep time doesn't it?


Most of the caffeine in tea is released in the first 30-45 seconds of brewing, so you can "decaf" tea by brewing for 30-45 seconds, pouring it out, and putting in fresh water. Caffeine being a volatile compound, I'd imagine similar to be true of coffee. My Google-fu in the two minutes I tried searching is not producing links to actual studies. But, I'll keep looking.
 
2013-03-19 02:01:55 PM  
 
2013-03-19 02:02:42 PM  
1.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-03-19 02:03:02 PM  

SteelCityKid: COME AT ME BROS.
[store.bbcomcdn.com image 358x450]


do you even mix?
 
2013-03-19 02:04:06 PM  

Egoy3k: Louisiana_Sitar_Club: Treygreen13: Louisiana_Sitar_Club: Bad math aside, the marketing is stupid.

Scenario A:
#1  I think I'll have a cup of regular coffee.
#2  I think I'll join ya!

Scenario B:
#1  I think I'll have two three cups of regular coffee.
#2  Are you effing crazy?!?!

FTFY

Convert a percent to a decimal by dividing by 100.

(200% / 100 = 2)

The amount of caffeine in one cup of coffee multiplied by 2 is the amount of caffeine in two cups of coffee.

If something has '200% more' caffeine it has 300% of the original amount.


Except that advertisers are notorious for ignoring mathematical conventions.  I guarantee it means 200% of the original amount.
 
2013-03-19 02:07:04 PM  
sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net
 
2013-03-19 02:07:32 PM  
In addition, if your coffee had 200 times more caffeine than your normal cup of coffee... (if I'm doing my math right) you'd be looking at about 8 grams of caffeine per cup. There is a story on PopSci about a kid eating 8g of caffeine and he didn't die - although he did have to be taken to the hospital.

That's also equivalent to 40 Maximum Strength No-Doz caplets. 40. Jesus christ. I took five of those once and I felt like I was going to fly off the face of the earth.
 
2013-03-19 02:08:36 PM  
Dumbitter must have failed elementary math. 200%  ≠ 200X rather 200% = 2X
 
2013-03-19 02:08:58 PM  
Holy shiat, subby ya blew it
 
2013-03-19 02:09:19 PM  

Rezurok: Egoy3k: Louisiana_Sitar_Club: Treygreen13: Louisiana_Sitar_Club: Bad math aside, the marketing is stupid.

Scenario A:
#1  I think I'll have a cup of regular coffee.
#2  I think I'll join ya!

Scenario B:
#1  I think I'll have two three cups of regular coffee.
#2  Are you effing crazy?!?!

FTFY

Convert a percent to a decimal by dividing by 100.

(200% / 100 = 2)

The amount of caffeine in one cup of coffee multiplied by 2 is the amount of caffeine in two cups of coffee.

If something has '200% more' caffeine it has 300% of the original amount.

Except that advertisers are notorious for ignoring mathematical conventions.  I guarantee it means 200% of the original amount.


Yes, I looked at the Death Wish Website after the reading article where I read this on their home page:

Here at Death Wish Coffee we have found a coffee bean with close to 200% the amount of caffeine as your typical coffee shop coffee.

Between the original article and my Boobies, I had forgotten that the author of the article flubbed the numbers.  I apologize to one and all for doing a little reading and getting tripped up by the facts of the product rather than relying on some interweb reporter.
 
2013-03-19 02:10:14 PM  
WTF is a Cuppa? Farking English yobs and their stupid, made-up language.
 
2013-03-19 02:15:09 PM  
If a normal cup of coffee is about 140mg of caffeine and this would be 200% that, this works out to about the caffeine content of a grande cup at Starbucks at approximately 340mg. This sounds more like clever marketing then actually a crazy deadly cup of coffee.
 
2013-03-19 02:15:37 PM  

Rezurok: Egoy3k: Louisiana_Sitar_Club: Treygreen13: Louisiana_Sitar_Club: Bad math aside, the marketing is stupid.

Scenario A:
#1  I think I'll have a cup of regular coffee.
#2  I think I'll join ya!

Scenario B:
#1  I think I'll have two three cups of regular coffee.
#2  Are you effing crazy?!?!

FTFY

Convert a percent to a decimal by dividing by 100.

(200% / 100 = 2)

The amount of caffeine in one cup of coffee multiplied by 2 is the amount of caffeine in two cups of coffee.

If something has '200% more' caffeine it has 300% of the original amount.

Except that advertisers are notorious for ignoring mathematical conventions.  I guarantee it means 200% of the original amount.


Death Wish Coffee's page on amazon also claims it is "200% more powerful". Oddity Central says "200% caffeine", which puts it at 2 cups. Their website says "Here at Death Wish Coffee we have found a coffee bean with close to 200% the amount of caffeine as your typical coffee shop coffee"

It appears that the info is being passed through several layers of people who either don't bother to read, or are bad at math.
 
2013-03-19 02:16:14 PM  

WhippingBoy: [24.media.tumblr.com image 500x377]
Not impressed.


When it hits 100 followed by the ding and heavenly choral sound is my favorite part of that episode.

Also...

200% is like twice as much right?

25.media.tumblr.com

/Lived on those and Snickers bars for a short time in the 80's
//Still a bit shaky
 
2013-03-19 02:16:29 PM  

ERNesbitt: karmaceutical: Alphakronik: If you want caffeine, stay away from dark roasted coffee beans.


Roasting vaporizes caffeine out of the beans, which is why lighter roasted beans like breakfast blends will have more kick, but a lighter flavor.

Rule of thumb:  The darker the bean, the less the caffeine.

Has more to do with the steep time doesn't it?

Most of the caffeine in tea is released in the first 30-45 seconds of brewing, so you can "decaf" tea by brewing for 30-45 seconds, pouring it out, and putting in fresh water. Caffeine being a volatile compound, I'd imagine similar to be true of coffee. My Google-fu in the two minutes I tried searching is not producing links to actual studies. But, I'll keep looking.


I think some beans may have more or less caffeine than others, based on a host of conditions and genetics etc.  I think caffeine has to be dissolved out, I don't think it vaporizes, though.  Steep time or extraction time certainly has a huge effect on caffeine, in addition to the flavors you get out of the grind in oil and other dissolved solids.
 
2013-03-19 02:17:21 PM  

Louisiana_Sitar_Club: Between the original article and my Boobies, I had forgotten that the author of the article flubbed the numbers.  I apologize to one and all for doing a little reading and getting tripped up by the facts of the product rather than relying on some interweb reporter.


Looks like we're all getting tripped up by (3) different caffeine claims. 200x more caffeine would require hospitalization. I can't even imagine the effects of the original claim. I'd probably be looking for a gun.
 
2013-03-19 02:22:40 PM  

SteelCityKid: COME AT ME BROS.
[store.bbcomcdn.com image 358x450]


this shiat makes me itch so bad.
 
2013-03-19 02:25:49 PM  
files.doobybrain.com
 
2013-03-19 02:28:40 PM  
I could use a shot of 200x of caffeine right about now.
 
2013-03-19 02:33:42 PM  
I want this technology applied to my whiskey.  2000 proof.  It'll take hair off a wooden leg at 5,000 yards
 
2013-03-19 02:36:00 PM  
200 times more caffeine ?  So like one cuban coffee ?
 
2013-03-19 02:36:03 PM  
The cutesy little word "cuppa" makes me really angry for no good reason.

That is all.
 
2013-03-19 02:43:52 PM  

ERNesbitt: karmaceutical: Alphakronik: If you want caffeine, stay away from dark roasted coffee beans.


Roasting vaporizes caffeine out of the beans, which is why lighter roasted beans like breakfast blends will have more kick, but a lighter flavor.

Rule of thumb:  The darker the bean, the less the caffeine.

Has more to do with the steep time doesn't it?

Most of the caffeine in tea is released in the first 30-45 seconds of brewing, so you can "decaf" tea by brewing for 30-45 seconds, pouring it out, and putting in fresh water. Caffeine being a volatile compound, I'd imagine similar to be true of coffee. My Google-fu in the two minutes I tried searching is not producing links to actual studies. But, I'll keep looking.


Coffee grounds tend to have a larger characteristic thickness than tea leaves, so the diffusion is probably a bit slower.  How much slower, I don't know.  I do know that when I find the office coffee pot empty and I don't want to wait for the entire pot to brew, putting my coffee mug under the basket for the first cup and then switching it for the pot produces a single cup of surprisingly tasty coffee with caffeine levels in the "high yield tactical" to "strategic" range.  It's pretty awesome.
 
2013-03-19 02:44:44 PM  

Egoy3k: Louisiana_Sitar_Club: Treygreen13: Louisiana_Sitar_Club: Bad math aside, the marketing is stupid.

Scenario A:
#1  I think I'll have a cup of regular coffee.
#2  I think I'll join ya!

Scenario B:
#1  I think I'll have two three cups of regular coffee.
#2  Are you effing crazy?!?!

FTFY

Convert a percent to a decimal by dividing by 100.

(200% / 100 = 2)

The amount of caffeine in one cup of coffee multiplied by 2 is the amount of caffeine in two cups of coffee.

If something has '200% more' caffeine it has 300% of the original amount.


Right.  And the next think you'll tell us is that .99999999... = 1
 
2013-03-19 02:46:30 PM  
Not good with the maths eh?
Not your strong suit?
's okay ->

200% = two cups of java instead of one.
pffft
it's why everything is posted in percentages - looks more manly, far more american.

going back to work.  Call me when you decide to keep running coffee through new coffee instead of fresh water.
 
2013-03-19 02:50:29 PM  
I will bet you that the submitter is a product of the US public school system.

Or possibly a member of congress.
 
2013-03-19 02:51:48 PM  

Professor Science: ERNesbitt: karmaceutical: Alphakronik: If you want caffeine, stay away from dark roasted coffee beans.


Roasting vaporizes caffeine out of the beans, which is why lighter roasted beans like breakfast blends will have more kick, but a lighter flavor.

Rule of thumb:  The darker the bean, the less the caffeine.

Has more to do with the steep time doesn't it?

Most of the caffeine in tea is released in the first 30-45 seconds of brewing, so you can "decaf" tea by brewing for 30-45 seconds, pouring it out, and putting in fresh water. Caffeine being a volatile compound, I'd imagine similar to be true of coffee. My Google-fu in the two minutes I tried searching is not producing links to actual studies. But, I'll keep looking.

Coffee grounds tend to have a larger characteristic thickness than tea leaves, so the diffusion is probably a bit slower.  How much slower, I don't know.  I do know that when I find the office coffee pot empty and I don't want to wait for the entire pot to brew, putting my coffee mug under the basket for the first cup and then switching it for the pot produces a single cup of surprisingly tasty coffee with caffeine levels in the "high yield tactical" to "strategic" range.  It's pretty awesome.


As a guy who has often gazed longingly into the stream of coffee pour out of the office machine, waiting for the pot to be full; I can say that the coffee you get at the beginning of the drip brew is stronger/better than that at the end.
 
2013-03-19 02:55:54 PM  

ZAZ: In college I drank Jolt Cola, "all the sugar and twice the caffeine." I doubt it did me much good relative to normal soda.



That shiat tasted awesome.

Drink 3.

I wouldn't mind this coffee to mix with my La Naviera.
 
2013-03-19 02:59:24 PM  
This looks pretty cool, (stolen from the comments section of the article)

http://www.funraniumlabs.com/the-black-blood-of-the-earth/
 
2013-03-19 03:03:41 PM  
Sounds to me like Subby was having a little fun with us.  Niiiiice.  I see what you did there.  +1 intarnets for you, Subby.
 
2013-03-19 03:05:40 PM  
How long before Nanny Bloomberg tries to ban this?
 
2013-03-19 03:07:55 PM  

MyKingdomForYourHorse: Parallax: At his parties he would just serve gigantic bowls of meat. That's it, just meat.

His name wouldn't happen to be Kowalski would it?


Close, it's Braski!
 
2013-03-19 03:13:59 PM  

Marcintosh: Not good with the maths eh?
Not your strong suit?
's okay ->

200% = two cups of java instead of one.
pffft
it's why everything is posted in percentages - looks more manly, far more american.

going back to work.  Call me when you decide to keep running coffee through new coffee instead of fresh water.


Actually 200% more caffeine would equal 3 cups of coffee, not 2. 100% more = twice as much, 200% more = 3 times as much.
 
2013-03-19 03:16:11 PM  

Whiskey Dickens: MyKingdomForYourHorse: Parallax: At his parties he would just serve gigantic bowls of meat. That's it, just meat.

His name wouldn't happen to be Kowalski would it?

Close, it's Braski!


upload.wikimedia.org
 
2013-03-19 03:21:54 PM  
So what you're saying is that this coffee was traveling at 9 times the speed of light at the time of the explosion.
 
2013-03-19 03:24:33 PM  
Anhydrous? Why not just say "powdered"?
 
2013-03-19 03:27:57 PM  
I dont care much about caffeine. I'mean -- decaf tastes gross and i love really strong java, i just dont get the idea of drinking coffee just for the buzz.

Its so tasty and delicious - just make and drink more...
 
2013-03-19 03:34:18 PM  

MethylTryp: Anhydrous? Why not just say "powdered"?


"Powdered" is a term used for things that won't kill you if you eat a moderate quantity of it.

Cup of powdered sugar? Add milk & dip my donut in it.

Cup of anhydrous caffeine? Heart explodes.

Mmmmm.... caffeinated frosting...
 
2013-03-19 03:34:46 PM  
I suppose I could go into a lengthy and detailed warning about what too much caffeine does to your heart and blood pressure, which then affects your arteries, kidneys and stomach lining, not to mention the affect on your brain.

But, why bother? Idiots would guzzle it if it had 2000 times the amount and had to be handled with gloves.

After all, folks have smoked banana peels, huffed cow shiat and sniffed glue. My own city banned and then rescinded the ban on the pretty but lethal Oleander bush, which is so deadly that even the smoke from burning the leafs can kill you. It blooms in pastel colors. The rich think it's pretty. So, they got the plant made legal again for their lawns. Now, it grows in the medians of the highway.

This is kind of like culling the herd.
 
2013-03-19 03:35:43 PM  

mikefinch: I dont care much about caffeine. I'mean -- decaf tastes gross and i love really strong java, i just dont get the idea of drinking coffee just for the buzz.

Its so tasty and delicious - just make and drink more...




Some people can't get Adderall and caffeine pills suck?

Loves me some coffee.
 
2013-03-19 03:36:31 PM  

karmaceutical: What is the LD50 for caffeine anyway?


Wikipedia, chum. That's what it's for.

QED:

Extreme overdose can result in death.[69][70] The 50) given orally, is 192 milligrams per kilogram in rats. The LD50 of caffeine in humans is dependent on individual sensitivity, but is estimated to be about 150 to 200 milligrams per kilogram of body mass or roughly 80 to 100 cups of coffee for an average adult.[4] Though achieving lethal dose with caffeine would be difficult with regular coffee, there have been reported deaths from overdosing on caffeine pills, with serious symptoms of overdose requiring hospitalization occurring from as little as 2 grams of caffeine.[citation needed]


In other words, it depends on how sensitive you are to caffeine, but you don't need 200 cups of coffee to off yourself unless you are grotesquely fat from eating and drinking nothing except Starbucks products for years.


I hate whatever it was that Wikipedia did that makes anything you cut and paste with a link in it turn into a link-style mess.


The famous lexicographer, writer and wit, Dr. Samuel Johnson was famous for the number of coffee houses he frequented, but was a enormous tea drinker (he was enormous and drank large amounts of tea). He had some quirks which have been explained by some as a form of Tourette's syndrome, and by others as the result of too damn much tea. However, Dr. Johnson himself was a stern and logical defender of tea against its critics (who had become numerous by his time as tea became a popular rather than aristocratic drink), pointing out that the idleness attributed to tea was more likely the cause rather than the effect of tea-drinking, and that tea was not nearly as unhealthy as the attackers claim.


It seems that everything comes under attack when it shifts from the classes to the masses. The rich man could drink half a dozen bottles of port and wine a day without blame, but alcoholism among the masses was a horror. Tea was OK when only the rich and middle classes could afford it but became a national shame when the working classes started to imbibe, even though they were substituting tea for beer.


And so on. Popularity breeds contempt, fear and snobbery.


I'm with Dr. Johnson. The old bear-like curmudgeon was right to attack the nay-sayers. Tea was not a luxury for the working classes. Like beer it was a necessity because the only safe water to drink that they got was boiled or sterilized by alcohol.


On the other hand, King James the First of England, Ireland, and Wales (IIRC, Sixth of Scotland) was right to excoriate tobacco. All in all, it was a useless and unhealthy habit, unlike tea and beer, which can be a part of a healthy diet in moderation but not in excess.


There is no safe level for the consumption of carcinogens, but it is hard to consume too much caffeine unless you are attempting suicide and know what you are doing.
 
2013-03-19 03:38:31 PM  
I remember for a short while there were a couple of companies that were making caffeinated bottled water. Krank2O (which still seems to be around) and Aquabuzz. All of the caffeine, none of the sugar.

Ah, those were the days.
 
2013-03-19 03:50:53 PM  
theinfosphere.org
 
2013-03-19 03:56:34 PM  
subbies today just can't do anything without a calculator.
 
2013-03-19 04:03:23 PM  

Insatiable Jesus: WTF is a Cuppa? Farking English yobs and their stupid, made-up language.


Hey, it's not just the British who like a cuppa.

They like a cuppakafee in Brooklyn also.

It's a shame that the Brooklyn accent seems to be dying from lack of neglect because it is comedy gold.
 
2013-03-19 04:04:20 PM  

xanadian: And the shuttle is coming in HOW many times faster than the speed of light, submitter?


It's coming in at 12 parsecs! Everybody evacuate the base!
 
2013-03-19 04:05:39 PM  
I hear that somebody once did the Kardassian Run in 12 bottles of Tylenol. Or maybe it was 12 condoms. I forget.
 
2013-03-19 04:08:16 PM  
DEA estimated street value $213,343,233.00.
 
2013-03-19 04:11:38 PM  

brantgoose: I hear that somebody once did the Kardassian Run in 12 bottles of Tylenol. Or maybe it was 12 condoms. I forget.


I once drank 12 carmel machiattos and had the Kardashian runs...
 
2013-03-19 04:12:38 PM  

anuran: I have a jar of pure, anhydrous caffeine in my kitchen. I use it to make old soda recipes.
It was really sobering to realize there was enough of it to quite literally kill a platoon of Marines.


It takes less pure powder caffine to od on than it takes cocaine to od.
 
2013-03-19 04:21:45 PM  

Alphakronik: If you want caffeine, stay away from dark roasted coffee beans.

Roasting vaporizes caffeine out of the beans, which is why lighter roasted beans like breakfast blends will have more kick, but a lighter flavor.

Rule of thumb:  The darker the bean, the less the caffeine.


Alpha is correct. If you want to enjoy a real coffee buzz, buy some green beans, roast them in an air popcorn popper until you hear the first "crack" then grind the roasted beans anyway you want. If you want to maximize the effect, add a glass of wine.
 
JVD
2013-03-19 04:26:08 PM  
Complete and utter math failure and use of "cuppa" makes me want to punch babies.
 
2013-03-19 04:32:50 PM  
Has anyone yet commented on subby's inability to understand the difference between "200 times" and "200 percent"? Yes? Excellent.

And, yes, if you're consuming anything solely for caffeine content, skip the pretense and just take caffeine. It's a hell of a lot cheaper, and you can control the dosage far more safely.
 
2013-03-19 04:38:36 PM  

jake_lex: dletter: And I am pretty sure 200 TIMES the amount of caffeine of a coffee at once WOULD actually be a death wish.   Wasn't there a story of some guy who OD'ed on caffeine powder and died recently?

Yeah, if you drank the same amount of coffee with 200 times more caffeine, you probably would die of a caffeine OD.

But 200% more caffeine...meh.  That's just getting into the caffeine level of most energy drinks.


You might be surprised: . As 12-16 oz Starbucks or fast-food coffee has more caffeine in it than a 16 oz Rockstar, Amp, Monster, etc. My understanding is most those are also relying on something else, like guarana's other stimulant compounds or just ass-loads of sugar.
 
2013-03-19 04:39:14 PM  
Meant to put a link Link
 
2013-03-19 04:47:28 PM  
Maybe Subtard meant "200 times ONE" If not, I don't know. Must be coming down from crack. Them. not me. I'm still going strong.
 
2013-03-19 04:49:55 PM  

GlobalStrategic MapleSyrup Reserve: HOW CAN I GET THIS ADMINISTERED RECTALLY?


Apply directly to your forehead
 
2013-03-19 04:52:33 PM  

Eddie Ate Dynamite: The cutesy little word "cuppa" makes me really angry for no good reason.

That is all.


Cup of joe, cup o' joe, java, cuppa, they all piss me off.
 
2013-03-19 05:09:06 PM  

jake_lex: But 200% more caffeine...meh. That's just getting into the caffeine level of most energy drinks.


Or, two cups of coffee ;)
 
2013-03-19 05:16:39 PM  
What the eff is a "cuppa"?


/I'll take 12 bags please
 
2013-03-19 05:18:40 PM  
Hmm... considering the higher price of these beans, I don't see why someone wouldn't just make himself 3 cups of regular coffee.
 
2013-03-19 05:57:09 PM  
Per cent non equalat per unum

You suck, subby
 
2013-03-19 06:17:26 PM  

GlobalStrategic MapleSyrup Reserve: HOW CAN I GET THIS ADMINISTERED RECTALLY?


shove it up your ass
 
2013-03-19 06:30:18 PM  

karmaceutical: ERNesbitt: karmaceutical: Alphakronik: If you want caffeine, stay away from dark roasted coffee beans.


Roasting vaporizes caffeine out of the beans, which is why lighter roasted beans like breakfast blends will have more kick, but a lighter flavor.

Rule of thumb:  The darker the bean, the less the caffeine.

Has more to do with the steep time doesn't it?

Most of the caffeine in tea is released in the first 30-45 seconds of brewing, so you can "decaf" tea by brewing for 30-45 seconds, pouring it out, and putting in fresh water. Caffeine being a volatile compound, I'd imagine similar to be true of coffee. My Google-fu in the two minutes I tried searching is not producing links to actual studies. But, I'll keep looking.

I think some beans may have more or less caffeine than others, based on a host of conditions and genetics etc.  I think caffeine has to be dissolved out, I don't think it vaporizes, though.  Steep time or extraction time certainly has a huge effect on caffeine, in addition to the flavors you get out of the grind in oil and other dissolved solids.


Quadruple ristretto, please.
 
2013-03-19 07:24:56 PM  
Regular coffee has about 500mg caffeine per serving, so "200 times" that would be 100 grams.
A dose of pure caffeine about the size of two eggs. Good luck ingesting that.
 
2013-03-19 07:39:36 PM  
Call me when they make a caffeinated Snickers bar.
 
2013-03-19 07:54:59 PM  

GlobalStrategic MapleSyrup Reserve: HOW CAN I GET THIS ADMINISTERED RECTALLY?


SHOVE IT UP YOUR ARSE!

Maybe with a tube after it cools.
 
2013-03-19 07:56:28 PM  

E5bie: Regular coffee has about 500mg caffeine per serving, so "200 times" that would be 100 grams.
A dose of pure caffeine about the size of two eggs. Good luck ingesting that.


I think you are out by about a factor of 10 or so. It`s more like 50mg (40-70mg in espresso)
 
2013-03-19 07:58:36 PM  

Oldiron_79: anuran: I have a jar of pure, anhydrous caffeine in my kitchen. I use it to make old soda recipes.
It was really sobering to realize there was enough of it to quite literally kill a platoon of Marines.

It takes less pure powder caffine to od on than it takes cocaine to od.


Nicotine has a LD50 of 75mg per kilo of body weight. Cocaine is 1200mg. Not sure on caffeine.
 
2013-03-19 07:59:12 PM  

MemeSlave: Call me when they make a caffeinated Snickers bar.


Chocolate has caffeine in it.
 
2013-03-19 08:00:28 PM  
Rev up your mochaccino with caffeinated flavored syrup.

Hmmm. Delicious atrial fibrillation.

www.energyfiend.com
 
2013-03-19 08:08:40 PM  

dready zim: E5bie: Regular coffee has about 500mg caffeine per serving, so "200 times" that would be 100 grams.
A dose of pure caffeine about the size of two eggs. Good luck ingesting that.

I think you are out by about a factor of 10 or so. It`s more like 50mg (40-70mg in espresso)


What the hell kind of "servings" are you two talking about?  A typical 6 U.S. fluid ounce cup (small, but the standard serving size for most references) of drip-brewed coffee has about 80-150mg of caffeine.  A $7 Starbucks Ventinormous Monstrossiato might hit 500mg, and you'd have to order your espresso by the thimblefull to get 40mg.
 
2013-03-19 08:24:50 PM  
iconsoffright.com
 
2013-03-19 08:42:51 PM  
so is that more or less caffeine than when i wash my 5 hour energy down with a 2 liter of dew?
 
2013-03-19 09:17:02 PM  

slayer199: I want!  My favorite coffee shop near me closed and I've been DYING for a replacement...


There's no coffee shop in this bag of beans.
 
2013-03-19 11:12:12 PM  

Delay: If you want caffeine, stay away from dark roasted coffee beans.

Roasting vaporizes caffeine out of the beans, which is why lighter roasted beans like breakfast blends will have more kick, but a lighter flavor.

Rule of thumb: The darker the bean, the less the caffeine.

Alpha is correct. If you want to enjoy a real coffee buzz, buy some green beans, roast them in an air popcorn popper until you hear the first "crack" then grind the roasted beans anyway you want. If you want to maximize the effect, add a glass of wine.


I need to ask - what does the wine do? This sounds most interesting. I will subscribe to your newsletter.
 
2013-03-19 11:16:12 PM  

dready zim: E5bie: Regular coffee has about 500mg caffeine per serving, so "200 times" that would be 100 grams.
A dose of pure caffeine about the size of two eggs. Good luck ingesting that.

I think you are out by about a factor of 10 or so. It`s more like 50mg (40-70mg in espresso)


oops. my bad.
 
2013-03-20 12:05:23 AM  
One of our local radio station DJs must have gotten this story from Fark because he thought it had 200 times the caffeine too.
 
2013-03-20 12:54:34 AM  
Subby's girlfriend wants a word about scale; nearly woke up that one time.
 
2013-03-20 01:30:15 AM  

fusillade762: One of our local radio station DJs must have gotten this story from Fark because he thought it had 200 times the caffeine too.


i swear this is a thing. We had a crappy radio dj in our small town top 40 station that would do little comment bits really similar to fark headlines on the days they came out...

I went to HS with him. he was a jerk and got fired from more than a few jobs... hisu autistic identical twin brother was a really nice guy. Diagnosed actual autistic and his twin wasnt. they looked exactly alike... high functioning and i think he works as a personal trainer at world gym... really nice guy. His fark headline stealing brother with the working brain was a dick though. CSB i suppose...
 
2013-03-20 09:00:53 AM  

serial arseonist: GlobalStrategic MapleSyrup Reserve: HOW CAN I GET THIS ADMINISTERED RECTALLY?

Apply directly to your forehead


Available at Walgreens
 
2013-03-20 09:13:01 AM  
www.procook.co.uk

1) Make coffee in this.
2) Put coffee in reservoir and make another coffee using the first coffee instead of water.
3) Don't sleep for quite a while.
 
2013-03-20 10:02:28 AM  

fusillade762: One of our local radio station DJs must have gotten this story from Fark because he thought it had 200 times the caffeine too.


Well, morning zoo DJ's are so well known for their math skillz.
 
2013-03-20 12:04:43 PM  
Personally, I'm glad people din't give Subby a hard time over their terribly math error. Usually, people jump right on those things, but you guys and gals really stepped up to the plate today and showed some class. Way to go!
 
2013-03-20 12:25:54 PM  

RadicalEryn82: What the eff is a "cuppa"?


/I'll take 12 bags please


A word no more annoying than "vodak"
 
2013-03-20 05:47:19 PM  
Subby, mods, and admins suck greenlight dick
 
2013-03-21 02:00:12 PM  

Professor Science: dready zim: E5bie: Regular coffee has about 500mg caffeine per serving, so "200 times" that would be 100 grams.
A dose of pure caffeine about the size of two eggs. Good luck ingesting that.

I think you are out by about a factor of 10 or so. It`s more like 50mg (40-70mg in espresso)

What the hell kind of "servings" are you two talking about?  A typical 6 U.S. fluid ounce cup (small, but the standard serving size for most references) of drip-brewed coffee has about 80-150mg of caffeine.  A $7 Starbucks Ventinormous Monstrossiato might hit 500mg, and you'd have to order your espresso by the thimblefull to get 40mg.


The standard size, as in the size coffee gets served in, is a 1Oz shot of espresso which has, depending on type of coffee, 40-70mg of caffeine. Starbucks serve their coffee in units of espresso shots. A single shot is a standard `serving`. A standard 6Oz cup of americano has 2 shots (80-140mg) and water. Some form of monstrous giganto coffee, I`m sure you will agree, is not a standard serving. 40-70 compared to 500 is closer to different by a factor of ten than it is any other factor.
 
2013-03-21 07:36:00 PM  

dletter: fusillade762: One of our local radio station DJs must have gotten this story from Fark because he thought it had 200 times the caffeine too.

Well, morning zoo DJ's are so well known for their math skillz.


To be fair it was the Afternoon Buzz not the Morning Zoo.
 
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