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(Slate)   "Dear Prudence: my girlfriend kisses and makes out with her cat and it really grosses me out. What should I do?"   (slate.com) divider line 112
    More: Silly, Prudi, Emily Yoffe, girlfriend  
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10040 clicks; posted to Main » on 19 Mar 2013 at 10:42 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-03-19 09:35:04 AM  
Dear girlfriend and cat,
You're a child and not ready to get married yet. Grow up.

sincerely, Voiceofreason01
 
2013-03-19 09:46:53 AM  
The sun is up, the sky is blue
It's beautiful and so are you
 
2013-03-19 09:48:29 AM  
Dear Prudence,
Why won't my parakeet eat my diarrhea?

Sincerely, GiantRex
 
2013-03-19 09:52:21 AM  
Dear girlfriend and cat,

Fark the cat. If she doesn't get the hint, stick it in her pooper.
 
2013-03-19 10:24:26 AM  
 
2013-03-19 10:27:43 AM  
Well, first, we'll need a bit more information. Can you describe this "making out"?

/In detail, please
 
2013-03-19 10:29:38 AM  
i236.photobucket.com
 
2013-03-19 10:32:52 AM  
Obvious meme hasn't been posted yet.
belieber.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-03-19 10:38:26 AM  
ftfa:

She thinks it is just fine to kiss it right on the nose, repeatedly. She basically kisses it, and makes this "om nom nom" noise while doing so.

ok, which farker wrote this?
 
2013-03-19 10:40:21 AM  
I just read further and ...

A: I understand your bafflement and distress. When kissing one's pets on the nose, the sound one makes should not be "om nom nom" but "num, num, nuu."

... is this for real?
 
2013-03-19 10:42:06 AM  

Eddie Adams from Torrance: [i236.photobucket.com image 250x343]


Just...why? Why would you do that?
 
2013-03-19 10:43:20 AM  
This sounds like a TFD thread
 
2013-03-19 10:44:58 AM  
notfncute.com
 
2013-03-19 10:44:58 AM  
No.

To easy.
 
2013-03-19 10:45:34 AM  
if a girl can kiss her kitty she should be in porn.
 
2013-03-19 10:45:40 AM  
It puts the lipstick on the cat's anus and checks the kitchen countertop for litttle "kisses."
 
2013-03-19 10:47:22 AM  
Dump Her!
I would.

Anyone who kisses any animal on the mouth is gross.

/it's the foreplay to beastality
 
2013-03-19 10:47:43 AM  
This too has me worked up.
 
zez
2013-03-19 10:47:51 AM  
He should be happy this isn't his girlfriend
 
2013-03-19 10:48:27 AM  
He should walk now. This is an easy divorce to avoid.
 
2013-03-19 10:48:31 AM  
The guy sounds like he may be a bit OCD. I bet he carries around a pocket container of Clorox Wipes. Me thinks the girl should tell him to fark off.
 
zez
2013-03-19 10:48:38 AM  
Let's try that again

t0.gstatic.com
 
2013-03-19 10:49:24 AM  
My cat will walk up behind me, jump on the back of my chair, and commence licking the top of my head.

Kissing a pet on the nose is, frankly, small potatoes.
 
2013-03-19 10:50:55 AM  
He should try a little experiment that can tell her where her cat's mouth has been. It involves lipstick.
 
2013-03-19 10:51:43 AM  
Let's review the situation from a different point of view.
His fiance is affectionate and she expresses her affection orally.

Okay, next problem.
 
2013-03-19 10:52:55 AM  
25.media.tumblr.com
 
2013-03-19 10:53:20 AM  
Dump her immediately.

/geez
//have to ask?
 
2013-03-19 10:54:53 AM  

SlothB77: I just read further and ...

A: I understand your bafflement and distress. When kissing one's pets on the nose, the sound one makes should not be "om nom nom" but "num, num, nuu."

... is this for real?


majidatmyworkplace.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-03-19 10:56:51 AM  

Ernie the Fork: It puts the lipstick on the cat's anus and checks the kitchen countertop for litttle "kisses."


Came in here to say something similar.  Lipstick on the cat's butt is the answer to all cat related questions.
 
2013-03-19 10:57:39 AM  
Dear Prudence,

Whenever I fall asleep on my back, my dog hunches over me, uses its paw to press its boner down into my mouth, and then rides my face to ejaculation.  If I wake up, he growls.  If I try to stop him, he bites me.  Do you have any tips on how to change your sleeping position?  No matter how hard I try, I always find myself on my back with a dog's dick halfway down my sore throat.  I need to fix this before our relationship sours!

spentmiles
 
2013-03-19 10:58:46 AM  
Lick the cat's ass then see if she's willing to kiss you.  If she is, dump her.  If not, she's a hypocrite.  Either way, ha-ha, you licked a cat's ass.
 
2013-03-19 10:59:22 AM  
To Prudence: You're completely correct. 'Num num nuu' is the proper sound to make when kissing a cat.

To 'Girlfriend and cat': Though you may find cat kissing gross, I suspect there is at least one (and likely more than one) reason you're hesitating to marry this wench. Dig deeper and you'll find those reasons (which are likely pretty well-grounded and valid). Then ditch her and run for the hills - it's what any sensible man would do these days.

To the Fark community: Kissing cats is fine. In fact, it's awesome. Kissing dogs, however, is gut-wrenchingly disgusting and should be strictly barred by law.
 
2013-03-19 11:00:08 AM  
Dear Prudence, my Farkette girlfriend keeps going to the bedroom with my German Shepherd, Rex, for what she calls "their special time."  Meanwhile, Rex looks happier than he ever has.  Should I be concerned?
 
2013-03-19 11:01:23 AM  
Be glad your girlfriend likes to lick the pussy.  That's one experience many of us dudes will never get to see.
 
2013-03-19 11:03:48 AM  
Ricin in the cat bowl.  Then love her forever.
 
2013-03-19 11:04:18 AM  
Paint your penis to look like a cats nose.
 
2013-03-19 11:04:53 AM  

airsupport: Be glad your girlfriend likes to lick the pussy.  That's one experience many of us dudes will never get to see.


Over rated to be honest, I mean it sounds all fun and games until you realize that women can go all night while men are an hour, tops. By the end of the night you've been relegated to butler service as you fetch sandwiches and water for the entertainment.
 
2013-03-19 11:06:17 AM  

Galloping Galoshes: Dear Prudence, my Farkette girlfriend keeps going to the bedroom with my German Shepherd, Rex, for what she calls "their special time."  Meanwhile, Rex looks happier than he ever has.  Should I be concerned?



Dear Galloping,

Not unless his dick is bigger than yours.

Best wishes,

Prudence
 
2013-03-19 11:07:03 AM  

MyKingdomForYourHorse: airsupport: Be glad your girlfriend likes to lick the pussy.  That's one experience many of us dudes will never get to see.

Over rated to be honest, I mean it sounds all fun and games until you realize that women can go all night while men are an hour, tops. By the end of the night you've been relegated to butler service as you fetch sandwiches and water for the entertainment.


I was sad that I had no shoes until I met a man who had no feet.
 
2013-03-19 11:08:20 AM  

MyKingdomForYourHorse: airsupport: Be glad your girlfriend likes to lick the pussy.  That's one experience many of us dudes will never get to see.

Over rated to be honest, I mean it sounds all fun and games until you realize that women can go all night while men are an hour, tops. By the end of the night you've been relegated to butler service as you fetch sandwiches and water for the entertainment.


That's why you only pay for one hour.
 
2013-03-19 11:08:31 AM  
To quote the great intertubes: "Have you tried hitting her?"
 
2013-03-19 11:09:36 AM  

SlothB77: I just read further and ...

A: I understand your bafflement and distress. When kissing one's pets on the nose, the sound one makes should not be "om nom nom" but "num, num, nuu."

... is this for real?


I mean, as real as sarcastic jokes aimed at making fun of idiot people asking stupid questions are.
 
2013-03-19 11:09:53 AM  
Q.   "Dear Prudence: my girlfriend kisses and makes out with her cat and it really grosses me out.   What should I do?"

A.  "Acknowledge that she is a crazy cat lady and do not stick your dick in her."
 
2013-03-19 11:09:54 AM  
She regularly takes kitty nose juice into her mouth? This is sign of damaged goods and the train is about to leave the station. We hope to see you aboard.
 
2013-03-19 11:10:18 AM  
I find that disgusting conceptually. I'd rather not date someone who kisses animals, because they lick themselves to clean.

But in reality, I bet it's not full blown or disgusting as I imagine it and it would probably be more than livable.
 
2013-03-19 11:10:24 AM  
We have an old saying in the Province of New Brunswick (at least the lower classes do). When the sub-working classes, or lumpen proletariat, are doing what they do best (not working) they say they are "farking the dog and selling the pups".

It's beautifully expressive of the futility of a life ill-spent. Many New Brunswickers are poet laureates when it comes to colourful language. Expressivité,as my old French professor used to call it.

I suggest you get back at your wife's perverse attempt to make you jealous of the cat with passive resistance.

Fark the dog, weirdo schmuck.
 
2013-03-19 11:11:51 AM  

untaken_name: MyKingdomForYourHorse: airsupport: Be glad your girlfriend likes to lick the pussy.  That's one experience many of us dudes will never get to see.

Over rated to be honest, I mean it sounds all fun and games until you realize that women can go all night while men are an hour, tops. By the end of the night you've been relegated to butler service as you fetch sandwiches and water for the entertainment.

That's why you only pay for one hour.


I know this now
 
2013-03-19 11:13:46 AM  
Cats lick their ass, and any other cat's ass (LOL "cat's ass") that is nearby, not to mention their paws, which walk in a shiatty catbox.

Its the cat or him. Thats what he should tell her.

(I have two cats. Theyre gross.)
 
2013-03-19 11:17:00 AM  
www.ruthlessreviews.com
 
2013-03-19 11:18:17 AM  
is this her cat?

img195.imageshack.us

If so, can I watch?
 
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