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(Cracked)   Five myths about the Revolutionary War everyone believes. Or why Texas will cry itself to sleep tonight   (cracked.com) divider line 23
    More: Interesting, Revolutionary War, Texas, Americans, Continental Army, Benedict Arnold, Call of Duty 2, loyalists, British Military  
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28515 clicks; posted to Main » on 17 Mar 2013 at 2:24 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
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Archived thread
2013-03-17 03:05:30 PM
6 votes:

alwaysjaded: vpb:

The girl named liberty was a myth?  What was her real name then?

Destiny


Many fist Destiny?
2013-03-17 01:39:31 PM
6 votes:
vpb:

The girl named liberty was a myth?  What was her real name then?

Destiny
2013-03-17 03:06:37 PM
5 votes:
It Must be a good thing I never paid attention in high school history class.

I've said the following for years now:
"If it wasn't for the French, we'd all be speaking English right now".

Amazing how much that pisses some people off.
2013-03-17 02:49:33 PM
3 votes:
I have it on good authoritah that Revere was "He who warned the British that they weren't going to be taking away our arms by ringing those bells and making sure as he's riding his horse through town to send those warning shots and bells that we were going to be secure and we were going to be free and we were going to be armed. "
2013-03-17 02:40:52 PM
3 votes:

iheartscotch: George Washington was 7 feet tall; with laserbeem eyes that never failed, to kill.

Nathaniel Greene was a mountain of a man, with a "born to kill" tattoo.

Between nailing all of the wives and mistresses of the British officers, Ben Franklin singlehandedly forced the French to admit he was awesome and help the US.

Thomas Jefferson once killed a British spy with a writing quill.

Sam Adams singlehandedly supplied all the beer for the colonists. His beer survives to this day.


And once again John Adams is ignored.

/Sit down, John!
2013-03-17 02:18:13 PM
3 votes:

Via Infinito: alwaysjaded: I've always enjoyed telling homophobes that one of the greatest Revolutionary war heroes was kicked out of the military for being gay.

Oh shiat that made me laugh. Freaking awesome.  Thanks for the link and welcome to my favs.


Spread the word. That nugget gave me endless amusement a while back when the hot button issue was gays in the military. Really rubbed the zealots the wrong way when they found out one of the fathers of our military was a sword enthusiast.
2013-03-17 01:49:21 PM
3 votes:

CPT Ethanolic: Here's another much believed myth - that Washington was some kind of super-general.  In reality, the guy bungled things over and over in the beginning and SHOULD have lost if Howe hadn't bungled things even worse at Boston and New York.  Early on, MANY surrounding Washington considered him incompetent and actively petitioned to have him removed from command.


Maybe that's why his monument is a huge phallic symbol
2013-03-17 02:32:18 PM
2 votes:
The north didn't actually "win".
2013-03-17 02:28:02 PM
2 votes:

alwaysjaded: vpb:

The girl named liberty was a myth?  What was her real name then?

Destiny


Actually, it was Destini.

You know, with an "i". She was the one with the live goldfish in her 7 inch pups.
vpb [TotalFark]
2013-03-17 01:35:30 PM
2 votes:

alwaysjaded: The best book I ever read about the Revolution was 1776 by David McCullogh. Really gave a good picture of just how much of a miracle it was that we won that war.

Also why I loved HBO's adaptation of John Adams. The second episode specifically. The portrayals of flawed people was much more refreshing than the "George Washington rides in on Jesus waves with a bald eagle on his shoulder and has TJ draft the Constitution in British blood while farking a girl named Liberty" myth.


The girl named liberty was a myth?  What was her real name then?
2013-03-17 07:10:19 PM
1 votes:

Kurmudgeon: brantgoose: What did the French ever do for Americans?

The problem was the French didn't fall inline with Bush Administration lies.
They got Dixie Chicked.
Nothing at all wrong with the French.


Neither did the Germans, but we still didn't call fermented cabbage "sour freedom".
2013-03-17 04:24:30 PM
1 votes:

Rent Party: Rochambeau told him to go fark himself


I would have expected Rochambeau to just kick him in the nuts.
2013-03-17 04:05:10 PM
1 votes:

iheartscotch: planes: Another Revolutionary War myth:

Wealthy George Washington continued to live a luxurious life during the winter at Valley Forge, all charged to his Continental Congress expense account. (new window)

George Washington once, singlehandedly, besieged Yorktown and forced the capitulation of England's forces. He also never told a lie and nailed King George's mistress every night.

/ George Washington is the greatest president we've ever had. He could have been king of the United States; but, he stuck to his principles and was generally awesome.

// he was also 7 ft tall and rode a T-Rex into battle.


Bang a gong.
2013-03-17 04:02:14 PM
1 votes:

Maxor: BokChoy: Texas wasn't even a state at the time so I don't know what they'd be sad about... they had about as much involvement in the revolutionary war as Korea did.

Actually it was it was part of the spanish colony of
Coahuila y Tejas they even succeeded from mexico together in the 1830s but the republic of the rio grande lost texas.


I'm glad they were secessful.
2013-03-17 03:16:02 PM
1 votes:
Also BS:

2.bp.blogspot.com
The most accurate part of the whole game is the fact that Paul Revere's house appears in Boston as part of it.
2013-03-17 03:02:16 PM
1 votes:
Why does Cracked hate America?
2013-03-17 02:59:14 PM
1 votes:

alwaysjaded: vpb:

The girl named liberty was a myth?  What was her real name then?

Destiny Sinutab


FTFY
2013-03-17 02:50:14 PM
1 votes:

SomeoneDumb: I have it on good authoritah that Revere was "He who warned the British that they weren't going to be taking away our arms by ringing those bells and making sure as he's riding his horse through town to send those warning shots and bells that we were going to be secure and we were going to be free and we were going to be armed. "


Thanks for the aneurism.
2013-03-17 02:29:41 PM
1 votes:
Pumps.

PUMPS

Goddammitsomuch I really need to learn how to type.
2013-03-17 01:53:18 PM
1 votes:

CPT Ethanolic: Here's another much believed myth - that Washington was some kind of super-general.  In reality, the guy bungled things over and over in the beginning and SHOULD have lost if Howe hadn't bungled things even worse at Boston and New York.  Early on, MANY surrounding Washington considered him incompetent and actively petitioned to have him removed from command.

I've always enjoyed telling homophobes that one of the greatest Revolutionary war heroes was kicked out of the military for being gay.

2013-03-17 11:43:55 AM
1 votes:
1. Subby should be kicked in the nads for linking page 2.
2. Cracked fails as usual for not including Paul Revere.  Warning people that the British were coming would have only confused people when they all thought of themselves as British.
2013-03-17 11:25:07 AM
1 votes:
True story.

The First Amendment as we now it, was really meant to be the 6th Amendment, but some moran farked up and submitted the 2nd page to Congress first after reading through it.

The right to a speedy trial and stuff was really supposed to be the First Amendment.
2013-03-17 11:15:30 AM
1 votes:
Obviously the author of this article is some kind of "turerist".
 
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