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(Slate)   "I'm sorry my autistic child is acting out. Let me tell you how you need to deal with it"   (slate.com) divider line 429
    More: Interesting, acting out, sensitivity training  
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18012 clicks; posted to Main » on 16 Mar 2013 at 4:03 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-03-16 06:27:22 PM

Lsherm: "that kid sounds like two elephants farking on top of a dying giraffe."


anongallery.org
 
2013-03-16 06:27:52 PM

This About That: Anybody remember back in the day, when the kid got loud, one of his parents would pick him up and carry him outside until he settled down? How is it that some kid's parents' rights instilled the obligation upon the rest of us to put up with his crap? What happened to our rights?


My mom would take me outside and lock me in the car so she could finish shopping.
 
2013-03-16 06:29:21 PM
This is why we should keep abortion legal. Post natal. Up to 50 years. Start with the parents.
 
2013-03-16 06:31:28 PM

Ennuipoet: To be fair, it's getting might difficult to distinguish between the developmentally disabled and the genuine assholes.    Numerically speaking, there are many more genuine assholes, so perhaps we could the assholes wear a special hat or something.  Or a t-shirt reading "I possess all my mental faculties, I am just a dick."


Conversely, the parents of the special needs kids should wear a t-shirt that says, "I should apologize for ruining your meal, but since I am a dick I really didn't give it any thought."
 
2013-03-16 06:34:35 PM

JRoo: This About That: Anybody remember back in the day, when the kid got loud, one of his parents would pick him up and carry him outside until he settled down? How is it that some kid's parents' rights instilled the obligation upon the rest of us to put up with his crap? What happened to our rights?

My mom would take me outside and lock me in the car so she could finish shopping.


Yep, mine too. Unfortunately, someone would call CPS now, because, um, kids shouldn't be alone...or something.

/THINK OF THE CHILDREN
 
2013-03-16 06:35:13 PM

L.D. Ablo: The problem is that every asshole behavior is being turned into some medical condition.  So then you have to "understand" the person while being treated like shiat.

I have a simple strategy for obnoxious children in restaurants.  I go up to the parents with a smile and tell them that the conditions of my parole say that I shouldn't be this close to children.


THIS.  Folks can marry their houseplant but bog forbid if I want to find my wife's ring in the grass with a metal detector.  A pet peeve of mine is all of the local idiots that bought some regentrified WW2 shoebox and park their car on the street.  Ya have that whole driveway and can't save all of the other users of the road the hassle of avoiding your car because you can't take an extra 15 seconds to back out of your driveway.  As my dad used to say, "the fleas come with the dog". I also appreciate the general 'tude of if I want to enjoy the one day I have off with the woman I love and buy her food and I am irked by someone's behavior, that I am some sort of caveperson.  Just get em a tshirt.  If their own behavior doesn't bother them at all, then why would a tshirt that explains their condition to the public?  We all want to know how special lil Suzy pink panties is also, so as not to offend thee.  Any dog under 25 pounds is not a service dog.  Just get a furby and feed them with your smartphone.  Also get the ADA tattooed on your forehead so we don't have to listen to the "You are NOT ALLOWED to ask me that question!" horseshiat in every airport, eatery, busline, sitcom, fruitbats, orangutans, and sitch.
 
2013-03-16 06:37:10 PM

kimmygibblershomework: L.D. Ablo: The problem is that every asshole behavior is being turned into some medical condition.  So then you have to "understand" the person while being treated like shiat.

I have a simple strategy for obnoxious children in restaurants.  I go up to the parents with a smile and tell them that the conditions of my parole say that I shouldn't be this close to children.

THIS.  Folks can marry their houseplant but bog forbid if I want to find my wife's ring in the grass with a metal detector.  A pet peeve of mine is all of the local idiots that bought some regentrified WW2 shoebox and park their car on the street.  Ya have that whole driveway and can't save all of the other users of the road the hassle of avoiding your car because you can't take an extra 15 seconds to back out of your driveway.  As my dad used to say, "the fleas come with the dog". I also appreciate the general 'tude of if I want to enjoy the one day I have off with the woman I love and buy her food and I am irked by someone's behavior, that I am some sort of caveperson.  Just get em a tshirt.  If their own behavior doesn't bother them at all, then why would a tshirt that explains their condition to the public?  We all want to know how special lil Suzy pink panties is also, so as not to offend thee.  Any dog under 25 pounds is not a service dog.  Just get a furby and feed them with your smartphone.  Also get the ADA tattooed on your forehead so we don't have to listen to the "You are NOT ALLOWED to ask me that question!" horseshiat in every airport, eatery, busline, sitcom, fruitbats, orangutans, and sitch.


Uh...okay.
 
2013-03-16 06:39:10 PM

ThatGuyGreg: /she saves her meltdowns for home


What is that, like a type of hot sandwich or maybe a brown with ice cream on it or something?
 
2013-03-16 06:41:21 PM
So an individual can get a free pass to act however they want due to some misplaced genes?   Well hot damn.

There are certain social norms -- and when I'm paying $100 dollars for a meal, I expect it to be quiet or at a normal dinner level of noise. I'm pretty sure the parents of these "special kids" would get pissed if i showed up outside their house at 3am and started making all sorts of retarded noises.

parents that parade their sex trophies around and expect everyone to fall to their knees and love the kid is bad enough... doing the same thing with a mentally retarded child is even worse. yes, I said mentally retarded, you know one of the original words before some feel good wussy society made the term politically incorrect because it hurt their dumb feelings.

What's next? we aren't going to call cancer cancer anymore?   "oh mr johnson you don't have cancer you just have a 1lb mass of free thinking cells going rogue in your body"
 
2013-03-16 06:44:31 PM

BubbaJones: MeanJean: kxs401

This "everything is for everyone" attitude is ruining humanity.

Yes, lets lock the disabled up in institutions where they get treated like shiat or hide them in the attic instead of accommodating them to spare YOUR delicate feefees.

Sorry that my disabled friend is delaying your journey because it takes a little time for her wheelchair to be strapped into the college transport van. I'll have her personally apologize to you for not being able to farking walk.

The nerve of the disabled, wanting to participate in society. How dare they want to contribute and live their lives?

That is not the problem here. This is:

"even though we had specifically decided to eat out at 6 on a Thursday night in a casual eatery so we wouldn't have to hold any of the kids to impossible standards of behavior. "


IMPOSSIBLE?? I expect him to not kill any one either! There are standards of behavior and if they are impossible, then he needs to be put away somewhere and cared for.

Welcome to Society. That is how it works.

So if I decide to go out to dinner on a Thursday at 6 because that is my Anniversary, I have to allow your child to screech and holler about his burger because you think you have the right to not correct him.


Some of these movements/vocaliza

Persnickety Paladin: Cup_O_Jo:

Actually MS is invisible. If I don't have my cane. I don't look disabled. So what is your point? I think it is funny that people  took my comment to mean that physically disabled are better than mentally disabled.. BTW you are not mentally disabled you are mentally ill. AGAIN a third different thing. I am not saying one disability is better than another. What I am saying is do not lum ...

 I don't think it is fair to classify mental and physical disabilities as the same thing. But, I think the reason why people lump them together is to remind themselves that if something happens that they may deem inconvenient it is a result of something beyond the person's control. It doesn't always come from a disrespectful place. It comes from the desire to accommodate situations that we might not encounter by ourselves, and to adjust to diverse needs when possible.

I also wanted to state that visible physical disability gives people clearer direction in terms of what they can expect. You see a wheelchair, you know this person has mobility issues, and thus, if you are not a jerk, you don't roll your eyes when they have to be loaded on the train. In the case of some physical disabilities and mental issues, one cannot tell; which leads to more sticky situations.


They are also lumped together because the same laws protect their rights.

FYI Those with ASD sometimes get a handicapped parking placard due to the risk of elopement.
 
2013-03-16 06:44:46 PM

hardinparamedic: WTFdoesitmatter: Kids not having to think for themselves anymore, and being placed in front of a TV/game console/computer as a substitute for parental interaction is doing the real damage.

You do realize that the "frigid, neglectful parent" theory has been disproven since the 1970s, right? The "real damage" is the fact that their brains developed too much neuronal density in the frontal lobe.


There are two sides to that coin that you're conveniently neglecting.  Problematic Behavior =/= Problematic Brain

Many frigid and neglectful parents do indeed end up with kids that are, on the surface, indistinguishable from the mentally handicapped. Their symptoms can be mild to downright farked up.  Having been capable of learning, but having no adequate teacher can yield a person that's troubled for their entire life.

Add to that, many doctors diagnose based on symptomatic behavior alone, not on catscans/MRI or other means of testing structure and function.

Your "debunking" is hardly what you make it seem.  Yes, it does not cause actual autism.  It can cause some severe developmental problems that are decidedly similar that can be mistaken as.(and what the guy you were replying to was talking about).

It's humorous because you're attempting to pretend you're superior, but are evidently inferior.

JWideman: Fark no longer quotes only the highlighted text. Anyway...


It does sometimes, it did just now for me in quoting you.  The new default post thing is only sporadically reliable.  They need to add an option to use the html by default.  I'm not exactly sure why it got changed.  People using noscript maybe?  Whatever, it's now an unreliable pain in the ass.
 
2013-03-16 06:46:15 PM
True story- Our family with three kids was out a few years ago at restaurant, and across the aisle was another family, a mom with two kids. Those kids were all over the place, visiting other people's, crawling under them, screaming, squealing, shrieking, trying to trip the waitress, etc. Everyone knew those kids names because mom never bothered to get up and address the issues, she wanted to have grown up talk with her sister, so of course would stop every other sentence to repeat any or all of the kids names.

In the meantime, we picked our food. Dinner came and we ate our dinner. Made small talk, etc. Kids stayed in their seats, no screaming. You get the idea. This isn't to brag, I think it was just a lucky night for us. Anyhow we get the check and pay, and on the way out an old man, Marlon Brando Godfather looking literally grabs my arm from his table and pulls me toward him with an iron grip on my coat, surrounded by a few son looking types, temporarily worrying my husband. The old man whispered in my ear "Now you, YOU have nice behaved children". I thanked him and nodded to my husband all was okay.

What I didn't say was that two of my kids are high functioning autistics. Those other kids, though one could not be sure, were just under disciplined and their mom seemed to think she was entitled to her time. My kids have and occasionally still do act out with the right triggers, but as their mom, I don't expect the public to deal with it. One of us will take the kid outside, take a walk with them or a quick drive in the car. One can't predict all sudden panics, but we can at least know when situations are ripe to look for a better outlet. We do drive ins for movies and the occasional Mom's Movietime bit- where the lights are still on, volume is softer, babies are crying, and everyone is used to kids running about. We plan things out and talk about them with the kids, and our expectations of them so that there are no surprises as much as possible.

Not sure where I was going with this. Basically, that I can't just keep my kids at home all the time for the sake of other people being afraid they cannot have a good time. I also know that many kids who are 'neurotypical' are worse in public. Not all, just the ones where the parent or parents needs to socialize overtake the times where they need to be on the job teaching kids how to behave. It's less often that a parent of a special needs kid can honestly mentally clock out for a long period of time, whereas maybe the parents of non diagnosed with anything believe that their kids can raise themselves and learn manners on their own?

/kids are like little Star Trek Vulcans
//except the one who is not affected with Autism. That one wants to be Cinderella.
///All the bases covered?
 
2013-03-16 06:49:42 PM

SploogeTime: Hey guys! Get sterilized!


Or perhaps:

2.bp.blogspot.com

/your move
 
2013-03-16 06:50:39 PM
Don't eat at family restaurants if you don't want to be around families. Someone making noise at a movie and won't stop? I'm complaining to management and getting a refund whether they are retarded or not.
 
2013-03-16 06:51:03 PM

Day_Old_Dutchie: The problem seems to be that some parents desperately want their developmentally-challenged kids to be "normal" in the worst possible way. So they attempt to "socialize" them at every opportunity.

The problem is that these social situations the kids are dragged to are extremely uncomfortable for them to deal with  - think of the most boring things you have had to deal with, but, of course you have the self-control NOT to let it be known. (E.g. a Catholic Wedding with the high mass included - you have to be polite to those who invited you, but, damn! it's BORING and goes on-and-on!)

However, some of these poor kids look at these social engagements as pure torture. They just want to be left in their own little world, in their own thoughts, repetitively playing with their simple toys, but they have to be made to sit still, be quiet and go along with everyone else.  And they will act out.

And forcing them into these situations to make mommy think they are normal won't teach them anything and is just plain cruel.


Children with ASD can be conditioned at a young age to function in certain situations. You introduce the experience slowly and they gradually learn to tolerate and behave appropriately.  The boy in the restaurant was misbehaving by the way. He was experiencing joy and excitement. The most a mother can teach him is "shh" and hope that he does it.  She could also try to distract him with something.

It is important that all children have a variety of life experiences. My son does get bored at home and LOVES to go on "field trips." He flaps, runs and vocalizes with excitement and sometimes tantrums because he doesn't want the experience to end.
 
2013-03-16 06:52:05 PM

Popcorn Johnny: You don't get a free pass to disturb others in public places just because you have a disability.


Huh. Well, I guess it's not a free pass considering what that person has to deal with on a daily basis.
 
2013-03-16 06:53:57 PM
WOOHOO! ROTTEN CROTCH FRUIT FOOD FIGHT THREAD

/hey don't blame me, i didn't tell you to have kids
//let alone waterheads
///amirite
 
2013-03-16 06:55:58 PM

bborchar: My friend's brother-in-law seems to be a high-functioning sociopath- he's very smart (he's an engineer, and he works with my husband at the lab); but he's also extremely moronic when it comes to interacting with people.  He's a leper at work, and while you feel sorry for him, when you meet him, it's VERY hard to like him.  He makes inappropriate comments to my friend (he went into the private room where she was nursing her son and started talking about her breasts the other day), and he charged a lot of porn to the company card and turned in on his statement.  He's a grown man, and has no friends and can't get a girlfriend.  It really is sad...but no one can stand to be around him.  However, his mother still babies him and begs everyone to spend time with him.

It's a sad reality, but people who don't function well in our society are going to be outcasts...and society won't change for them.  It's hard to be friends with someone who doesn't understand boundaries.  As a mother, I completely understand wanting people to like your child and being heartbroken when they don't...but as a member of society, it's impossible to welcome everyone in when they are so difficult to deal with.  It's a very thin line, and there's not a lot of help for people who have to walk it.


I might be wrong, but I'd bet dollars to donuts that he isn't a sociopath.  Sociopaths can often have friends and be quite well liked because they are experts at hiding their true nature.  Equally they can often be successful with women.  And they don't usually make outrageous, socially inappropriate comments unless provoked because they are trying to blend in.  It's kind of like being very different and not feeling like you fit in at all but being hyper aware of this so that you are able to 'fake it' to seem normal.

I suspect that there is something wrong with him.  And I certainly agree that, as you say, sometimes people are not going to fit in, not because of their handicap but because of the way they are.  In my experience, the biggest factor is aggression   No matter the handicap, if a person isn't particularly aggressive then most people with show them a great deal of patience.  If the person is very aggressive then the tolerance from others drops rapidly.
 
2013-03-16 07:01:53 PM
Why do people with disabled placards on their cars drive like they're mentally disabled as well?
 
2013-03-16 07:08:41 PM

Hallows_Eve: Basically, that I can't just keep my kids at home all the time for the sake of other people being afraid they cannot have a good time.


No one expects you to, until it comes down to a damn good chance that your kids will be a problem for others.  Sure, if they do have an occasional fit but are generally well behaved, that's fine, shiat happens to everyone, "normal" kids or not, as your example shows.

The sentiment is towards all parents(all that recognize their kids are often problematic in public at any rate).  That chick with underdisciplined kids?  She's just as much at fault for taking uncontrollable kids into public.

It's not a normal people vs challenged people thing.  It's polite vs impolite.  It has nothing to do with why the kids are misbhaved, only that they are misbehaved.

For what it's worth, the people with kids that are not well disciplined, they are worse.  You can tell that it's a historical pattern, the kids know mom doesn't give a shiat and it shows.  That's not only impolite, but reprehensible because it's arguable that it's child abuse that allows the kids to act that way in the first place. "Spoil" and "rotten", as such, are used for a reason, that kind of up-bringing can have life-long adverse effects.

At least you care, and if you do have a problem in public, something tells me you may be embarrassed and apologize.  That woman with the little devil children, she never will be embarrassed, if she does apologize, it will be a token effort with no real meaning, symbolic of her whole apathetic situation.

It's all about consideration.  People that show none towards others, don't deserve the light of day, but often do deserve much of the negative attention they do get(though maybe an explanation as well).  But the odds of those fark-up/off parents actually reading or understanding what is being said is about nil anyhow.  In reality, they're the village idiot's.
 
2013-03-16 07:09:13 PM

whistleridge: This About That: Anybody remember back in the day, when the kid got loud, one of his parents would pick him up and carry him outside until he settled down? How is it that some kid's parents' rights instilled the obligation upon the rest of us to put up with his crap? What happened to our rights?

I got one warning, then I got hauled to the bathroom and got a firm spanking. One memorable time, the restaurant applauded as I and a friend were hauled away to our fates (it struck home...i never misbehaved in public again). 

I'm pretty sure any parents who did that today would have CPS called on them. I'm not advocating one way or the other, just noting that times, and perspectives, change.


May have been the whole room applauding your punishment that helped.
These days though guaranteed to have some ignorant helicopter parent supporting their childs behaviour and causing a bigger disturbance than controlling their crotchfruit.
 
2013-03-16 07:10:20 PM

kimmygibblershomework: L.D. Ablo: The problem is that every asshole behavior is being turned into some medical condition.  So then you have to "understand" the person while being treated like shiat.

I have a simple strategy for obnoxious children in restaurants.  I go up to the parents with a smile and tell them that the conditions of my parole say that I shouldn't be this close to children.

THIS.  Folks can marry their houseplant but bog forbid if I want to find my wife's ring in the grass with a metal detector.  A pet peeve of mine is all of the local idiots that bought some regentrified WW2 shoebox and park their car on the street.  Ya have that whole driveway and can't save all of the other users of the road the hassle of avoiding your car because you can't take an extra 15 seconds to back out of your driveway.  As my dad used to say, "the fleas come with the dog". I also appreciate the general 'tude of if I want to enjoy the one day I have off with the woman I love and buy her food and I am irked by someone's behavior, that I am some sort of caveperson.  Just get em a tshirt.  If their own behavior doesn't bother them at all, then why would a tshirt that explains their condition to the public?  We all want to know how special lil Suzy pink panties is also, so as not to offend thee.  Any dog under 25 pounds is not a service dog.  Just get a furby and feed them with your smartphone.  Also get the ADA tattooed on your forehead so we don't have to listen to the "You are NOT ALLOWED to ask me that question!" horseshiat in every airport, eatery, busline, sitcom, fruitbats, orangutans, and sitch.


oldmanyellsatcloud.jpg

I loled.
 
2013-03-16 07:11:22 PM
Is this the thread where people self-diagnose as having Aspergers? Apparently so ...
 
2013-03-16 07:14:22 PM

serial_crusher: Pocket Ninja: This was very good, subby, and you are going to be rewarded in the thread. And you avoided what would have been overkill in selecting the Hero tag, a common rookie mistake. My one suggestion would have been to redirect the apologetic element in the first half of the headline, which diminishes some of the overall punch. Instead of apologizing on behalf of the child, I would have had the woman apologizing for the person being bothered by the child, e.g., "I'm sorry that you are bothered by my autistic child acting out. Let me tell you how you need to deal with it." A minor tweak, to be sure, but it would have upped the rage at least a notch or two.

I disagree. The genius of subby's headline is that it starts out with a parent of an autistic child behaving reasonably for once. You get this false sense of hope, only to have it taken away.


This. The headline is farking brilliant as it is. One of the best I have ever read.
 
2013-03-16 07:14:42 PM
A waitress sat me in a dining room full of screaming kids this week. I got up and walked over to the bar and ate my meal there instead. Apparently that makes me an awful person according to this woman.

The one thing parents need to remember is that the infinite patience they have for their own children does not extend to other people. No one is telling you not to love your kid. We're just telling you that we don't.
 
2013-03-16 07:15:44 PM

omeganuepsilon: something tells me you may be embarrassed and apologize.


Or otherwise show that you are considerate of the other people around you.  Didn't mean to imply anything there.  Embarrassment itself is nothing to be shameful about, or used to deride people(shouldn't be at any rate).  It's a display of one who's typically agreeable and considerate, but that a mistake was made and recognized.  People that don't get embarrassed are typically the one's you have to watch out for, be they sociopaths or psychopaths or otherwise disturbed.

Vsauce did a youtube video about embarrassment recently, kinda a neat concept or two in there.
 
2013-03-16 07:19:03 PM

omeganuepsilon: The new default post thing is only sporadically reliable. They need to add an option to use the html by default. I'm not exactly sure why it got changed. People using noscript maybe? Whatever, it's now an unreliable pain in the ass.


THIS THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS...

Old buttons, plz. I am not getting over it.
 
2013-03-16 07:21:05 PM

The sound of one hand clapping: bborchar: My friend's brother-in-law seems to be a high-functioning sociopath- he's very smart (he's an engineer, and he works with my husband at the lab); but he's also extremely moronic when it comes to interacting with people.  He's a leper at work, and while you feel sorry for him, when you meet him, it's VERY hard to like him.  He makes inappropriate comments to my friend (he went into the private room where she was nursing her son and started talking about her breasts the other day), and he charged a lot of porn to the company card and turned in on his statement.  He's a grown man, and has no friends and can't get a girlfriend.  It really is sad...but no one can stand to be around him.  However, his mother still babies him and begs everyone to spend time with him.

It's a sad reality, but people who don't function well in our society are going to be outcasts...and society won't change for them.  It's hard to be friends with someone who doesn't understand boundaries.  As a mother, I completely understand wanting people to like your child and being heartbroken when they don't...but as a member of society, it's impossible to welcome everyone in when they are so difficult to deal with.  It's a very thin line, and there's not a lot of help for people who have to walk it.

I might be wrong, but I'd bet dollars to donuts that he isn't a sociopath.  Sociopaths can often have friends and be quite well liked because they are experts at hiding their true nature.  Equally they can often be successful with women.  And they don't usually make outrageous, socially inappropriate comments unless provoked because they are trying to blend in.  It's kind of like being very different and not feeling like you fit in at all but being hyper aware of this so that you are able to 'fake it' to seem normal.

I suspect that there is something wrong with him.  And I certainly agree that, as you say, sometimes people are not going to fit in, not because of their handicap but because of the ...


LOL no, he isnt a sociopath. I think you're being trolled. He's no sociopath, he is...

wdca.images.worldnow.com
 
2013-03-16 07:22:07 PM

PsiChick:  I had undiagnosed Asperger's Syndrome


How do you know this, if it hasn't been diagnosed?
 
2013-03-16 07:22:46 PM

december: Is this the thread where people self-diagnose as having Aspergers? Apparently so ...


It seems as though people who are socially awkward, but think of themselves as intellectually superior will often claim they have Aspergers. Back in my day, we just used to call them "dorks" or "geeks".
 
2013-03-16 07:24:36 PM
"My son is autistic ... "
"Oh, sorry," he said.


At this point you have made your point. The other diner has accepted the reason for the child being noisy

"He's not trying to disturb you intentionally ... "

You followed up without noticing that your "opponent" had conceded

"I heard you the first time," he snapped.

He's irritated with your follow up not your kid. Read the conversation better next time it was not about your child it was you.
 
2013-03-16 07:26:45 PM
And yet they still want special treatment when it comes to parking and ramps and $60,000 a year aides in public schools.
 
2013-03-16 07:27:25 PM

namegoeshere: omeganuepsilon: The new default post thing is only sporadically reliable. They need to add an option to use the html by default. I'm not exactly sure why it got changed. People using noscript maybe? Whatever, it's now an unreliable pain in the ass.

THIS THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS...

Old buttons, plz. I am not getting over it.


^THIS
 
2013-03-16 07:34:45 PM

hundreddollarman: namegoeshere: omeganuepsilon: The new default post thing is only sporadically reliable. They need to add an option to use the html by default. I'm not exactly sure why it got changed. People using noscript maybe? Whatever, it's now an unreliable pain in the ass.

THIS THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS  THIS...

Old buttons, plz. I am not getting over it.

^THIS


Bears repeating.
/maybe the squeeky wheel gets the grease
 
2013-03-16 07:36:49 PM

Neums: I get that the headline says "special needs," but the thrust of the article (I didn't read it all, but scanned) was primarily about autistic people, right? So why use a pic of a kid with Downs?


How many different stock photos do you expect a journalist to keep in their /tard folder?

Being on Fark mine is quite well stocked of course, but let's face it, most of those don't work well in serious conversations (though GW Bush falling off a Segway would have still been a good choice for the pic)
 
2013-03-16 07:37:01 PM
For a group of people that are seemingly antisocial and never leave the basement, there sure are a lot of sensitive biatches on Fark.

Kid's autistic, he might get a little annoying., but at least he's got an excuse.  You don't.  Deal with it, don't whine and cry about how your serenity is being destroyed in public (which is idiotic to expect anyway).
 
2013-03-16 07:37:18 PM

december: A waitress sat me in a dining room full of screaming kids this week. I got up and walked over to the bar and ate my meal there instead. Apparently that makes me an awful person according to this woman.

The one thing parents need to remember is that the infinite patience they have for their own children does not extend to other people. No one is telling you not to love your kid. We're just telling you that we don't.


Point taken and noted.

hundreddollarman: Why do people with disabled placards on their cars drive like they're mentally disabled as well?


You noticed that too?  I thought they only gave those out to mentally handicapped people, until my fil got his.  His driving went to crap, and now I think the placard has mental disabling powers.  It starts with the self entitlement over their disability and then changes their hindsight from 20/20 to severe nearsightedness when discussing what they had done wrong.  My fil still insist the time he rear ended a woman that stopped for a r/r crossing was all her fault.
 
2013-03-16 07:42:30 PM

NaziKamikaze: For a group of people that are seemingly antisocial and never leave the basement, there sure are a lot of sensitive biatches on Fark.

Kid's autistic, he might get a little annoying., but at least he's got an excuse.  You don't.  Deal with it, don't whine and cry about how your serenity is being destroyed in public (which is idiotic to expect anyway).


It's BECAUSE we never leave the basement we REALLY cherish those nights out. Also, a restaurant is not public, as in say, a park, or a street corner.
 
2013-03-16 07:42:41 PM
This article is a load of bullshiat.  I have autism.  This author is using autism as an excuse to avoid discipline and self-control.  If your kids can't behave in a socially-acceptable manner, YOU DON'T TAKE THEM OUT to places where it matters until they learn better.  And, yes, a lot of places matter.
 
2013-03-16 07:46:30 PM

omeganuepsilon: No one expects you to, until it comes down to a damn good chance that your kids will be a problem for others.  Sure, if they do have an occasional fit but are generally well behaved, that's fine, shiat happens to everyone, "normal" kids or not, as your example shows.

The sentiment is towards all parents(all that recognize their kids are often problematic in public at any rate).  That chick with underdisciplined kids?  She's just as much at fault for taking uncontrollable kids into public.

It's not a normal people vs challenged people thing.  It's polite vs impolite.  It has nothing to do with why the kids are misbhaved, only that they are misbehaved.

For what it's worth, the people with kids that are not well disciplined, they are worse.  You can tell that it's a historical pattern, the kids know mom doesn't give a shiat and it shows.  That's not only impolite, but reprehensible because it's arguable that it's child abuse that allows the kids to act that way in the first place. "Spoil" and "rotten", as such, are used for a reason, that kind of up-bringing can have life-long adverse effects.

At least you care, and if you do have a problem in public, something tells me you may be embarrassed and apologize.  That woman with the little devil children, she never will be embarrassed, if she does apologize, it will be a token effort with no real meaning, symbolic of her whole apathetic situation.

It's all about consideration.  People that show none towards others, don't deserve the light of day, but often do deserve much of the negative attention they do get(though maybe an explanation as well).  But the odds of those fark-up/off parents actually reading or understanding what is being said is about nil anyhow.  In reality, they're the village idiot's.


I should have mentioned that I don't volunteer to the general public (er, FARK not included?) that my kids run against the brain grain. Heck, I didn't even tell the kids their own 'official' diagnosis (which changes according to government and insurance stuff) until long after I was sure it wasn't going to be used as an excuse. I don't accept that my job is to raise snowflakes- so "Kid can't do this because of diagnosis x" stuff never get off the ground. I grew up with a couple of relatives who embodied the phrase 'self fulfilling prophecy' and was certain unless we nipped that early on the same would happen to this generation, learning to live realistically with both life's beauty and brutality.

You're right, though. I do worry that I come off as a t-shirt stating diagnosis braggart. And I have apologized for the occasional sudden frequency blasting freak out, as I have calmly removed the affected child away from the situation, but usually with a "Sorry, folks." on the way out, rather than a "Please forgive that my child has a fluid diagnosis on paper, but is otherwise supersensitive to hearing someone's piggy ringtone frequency at full blast."

That said, looking through the situation via TFA mom's eyes, I did find it rude of the mom to continue to explain to the old man about her son's diagnosis, as much as I did for the old man to snap back at her in response. So there its a matter of oversensitive mom vs grumpy old man likely of the men-don't-hug generation.
 
2013-03-16 07:47:05 PM
There are more people than I realized who think "autistic" means "some selfish asshole who doesn't realize that my enjoyment of my Chili's burger in total silence is more important than everything else combined."

I had my vacation last week disrupted twice by autistic kids. But being an adult not suffering from inflated delusions of my own importance, I took it in stride.
 
2013-03-16 07:48:11 PM

Dr. Goldshnoz: NaziKamikaze: For a group of people that are seemingly antisocial and never leave the basement, there sure are a lot of sensitive biatches on Fark.

Kid's autistic, he might get a little annoying., but at least he's got an excuse.  You don't.  Deal with it, don't whine and cry about how your serenity is being destroyed in public (which is idiotic to expect anyway).

It's BECAUSE we never leave the basement we REALLY cherish those nights out. Also, a restaurant is not public, as in say, a park, or a street corner.


LOL know how I know you don't know the legal definition of "Public place"

/I know
 
2013-03-16 07:50:08 PM

Kibbler: There are more people than I realized who think "autistic" means "some selfish asshole who doesn't realize that my enjoyment of my Chili's burger in total silence is more important than everything else combined."

I had my vacation last week disrupted twice by autistic kids. But being an adult not suffering from inflated delusions of my own importance, I took it in stride.


I'm sorry you aren't that important.

/i keed
 
2013-03-16 07:56:22 PM

Kibbler: There are more people than I realized who think "autistic" means "some selfish asshole who doesn't realize that my enjoyment of my Chili's burger in total silence is more important than everything else combined."

I had my vacation last week disrupted twice by autistic kids. But being an adult not suffering from inflated delusions of my own importance, I took it in stride.


Word, and if you get at least two strides in that's usually enough to put them through a window, works great.
 
2013-03-16 07:58:07 PM

Madbassist1: Dr. Goldshnoz: NaziKamikaze: For a group of people that are seemingly antisocial and never leave the basement, there sure are a lot of sensitive biatches on Fark.

Kid's autistic, he might get a little annoying., but at least he's got an excuse.  You don't.  Deal with it, don't whine and cry about how your serenity is being destroyed in public (which is idiotic to expect anyway).

It's BECAUSE we never leave the basement we REALLY cherish those nights out. Also, a restaurant is not public, as in say, a park, or a street corner.

LOL know how I know you don't know the legal definition of "Public place"

/I know


It seems you are conflating the idea of a public restaurant, which is actually a private business on a private property, with a true public space, such as the sidewalk and street outside said restaurant.
 
2013-03-16 08:03:38 PM

Dr. Goldshnoz: Madbassist1: Dr. Goldshnoz: NaziKamikaze: For a group of people that are seemingly antisocial and never leave the basement, there sure are a lot of sensitive biatches on Fark.

Kid's autistic, he might get a little annoying., but at least he's got an excuse.  You don't.  Deal with it, don't whine and cry about how your serenity is being destroyed in public (which is idiotic to expect anyway).

It's BECAUSE we never leave the basement we REALLY cherish those nights out. Also, a restaurant is not public, as in say, a park, or a street corner.

LOL know how I know you don't know the legal definition of "Public place"

/I know

It seems you are conflating the idea of a public restaurant, which is actually a private business on a private property, with a true public space, such as the sidewalk and street outside said restaurant.


A private business on private property that is open to the public is a public place, both legally and figuratively. Trust me dude, you're losing this one.
 
2013-03-16 08:06:02 PM

Hallows_Eve: That said,


Snipped only to save space.

You come off as an admirable person.  You don't belong on Fark, GTFO.

Seriously though, you're great.
 
2013-03-16 08:20:59 PM

Chinchillazilla: He has been scowled at on airplanes, in movie theaters, in restaurants, and in bookstores. And I get it-I prefer a quiet airplane ride as much as the next person.

The thing is, you probably don't prefer quiet as much as I do. I have Asperger's, and part of that is that I have a really low tolerance for loud, high-pitched, and/or irregularly spaced noises. A loud crowd? I can deal. A single shrieking person? My ears will single that out for special attention. I am not capable of distracting myself from it. It can cause me to have a panic attack if I can't escape the source of the noise.

So what do I do in situations like this? Am I just screwed because my disability conflicts with the more severe disabilities of others?


You should carry a gun.
 
2013-03-16 08:25:43 PM
My mom knew exactly what to do in these situations. She could settle down any rambunctious kid anywhere. Autistic or otherwise. She always carried around balloons in her purse. If she saw a kid getting jacked up, she'd whip out a balloon, blow it up and hand it to the kid. Saw it done many times and it never failed. Kids are mesmerized by a balloon that shows up out of nowhere. The frazzled moms always thanked my mom too.
 
2013-03-16 08:27:05 PM

Madbassist1: Dr. Goldshnoz: Madbassist1: Dr. Goldshnoz: NaziKamikaze: For a group of people that are seemingly antisocial and never leave the basement, there sure are a lot of sensitive biatches on Fark.

Kid's autistic, he might get a little annoying., but at least he's got an excuse.  You don't.  Deal with it, don't whine and cry about how your serenity is being destroyed in public (which is idiotic to expect anyway).

It's BECAUSE we never leave the basement we REALLY cherish those nights out. Also, a restaurant is not public, as in say, a park, or a street corner.

LOL know how I know you don't know the legal definition of "Public place"

/I know

It seems you are conflating the idea of a public restaurant, which is actually a private business on a private property, with a true public space, such as the sidewalk and street outside said restaurant.

A private business on private property that is open to the public is a public place, both legally and figuratively. Trust me dude, you're losing this one.


except in the restaurant i can tell you to shut the hell up because your kid is obnoxious.
 
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