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(The Courier UK)   There's all dead, there's mostly dead, and then there's only dead for 30 minutes and then not quite so dead, which results in the bank where you had your massive heart attack apologizing for offering your family condolences   (thecourier.co.uk) divider line 27
    More: Unlikely, Dundee, Santander, heart attacks, condolences  
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3318 clicks; posted to Main » on 16 Mar 2013 at 11:00 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



27 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-03-16 08:43:51 AM  
"family very upset"

Really? The branch handled this nicely. They were mistaken as to whether he died or not but did things extraordinarily considerate to family, branch users and workers. Calm down and understand that you're upset about your dad not the tasteful way the bank handled it, Francis.
 
2013-03-16 11:08:10 AM  
So the bank was like "Sorry we were sorry about your dad"?
 
2013-03-16 11:10:27 AM  
Alan Robertson said: "He had a massive heart attack. It took half an hour to resuscitate him, so he had half an hour with no oxygen to his brain. We don't know if he's going to pull through, but he is still alive."

Also technically still alive:
1.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-03-16 11:11:40 AM  
"My mum is particularly upset"

...Now THAT'S a wife...
 
2013-03-16 11:14:32 AM  
poemsprayersandponderings.files.wordpress.com

/ oblig
 
2013-03-16 11:15:02 AM  
"Sorry your dad died, but we are happy he got better?"
 
2013-03-16 11:18:25 AM  
www.gatheryourparty.com
 
2013-03-16 11:19:24 AM  

KaiserRoll: "Sorry your dad died, but we are happy he got better?"


Sorry your dad died but we'll gladly unfreeze his assets and allow him to access his account once he sends us documents (in triplicate) that shows he has been declared alive. We'll also need two witnesses that can confirm he is alive and testimony from the doctor. Once this is done then the bank will charge a 5% unfreezing fee and a 5% access fee.

If we don't hear from them within five days then his assets will be passed on to the next of kin (per his will) with the bank taking it's 15% transfer fee.
 
2013-03-16 11:19:25 AM  
www.thecourier.co.uk

"Death comes for us all, but Death doesn't mean you have to stop doing your banking. When Death comes calling, go to Nethergate Bank."
 
2013-03-16 11:26:19 AM  
So, you're saying there's an open PR position at your bank now?

Seriously. Who thinks this is a good idea?
 
2013-03-16 11:27:30 AM  
sounds like the bank just wanted an excuse to shut her down for the day....let's just assume he died.
 
2013-03-16 11:28:07 AM  

Ivo Shandor: Alan Robertson said: "He had a massive heart attack. It took half an hour to resuscitate him, so he had half an hour with no oxygen to his brain. We don't know if he's going to pull through, but he is still alive."

Also technically still alive:
[1.bp.blogspot.com image 400x598]


Yeah, half an hour with no blood to his brain... I'm thinking they weren't wrong to announce his death. Maybe they got the guy's body working, but I don't think their family member is really in there any more.

I'm a little confused as to the family's outrage at the bank. I guess they just are grieving and want SOMEONE to be angry at to make themselves feel better, so they picked the bank. Even though the bank didn't give the guy the heart attack or do anything wrong like impede rescue attempts or something... Who the hell can be mad at them for thinking someone was dead after he couldn't be revived for 30 minutes? Being pissy with the bank branch isn't going to bring the guy back, people.
 
2013-03-16 11:31:59 AM  
Have reached the age that "Drop Dead" said in anger really has some teeth.

That said, no blood, no foul.  Have a laugh and move on.  Bigger fish to fry at that age.

Everyone's so fargin' serious - nobody gets off this rock alive anyway so what's the big?
 
2013-03-16 11:33:52 AM  
Just wait until he really DOES die.  The bank will probably take months to confirm it, and refuse to do any transactions without him coming into the bank branch in person to sign for it.
 
2013-03-16 11:42:49 AM  

the801: "Death comes for us all, but Death doesn't mean you have to stop doing your banking. When Death comes calling, go to Nethergate Bank."


Thread over, you win.

/epic
 
2013-03-16 11:52:48 AM  
I thought you said he was dead?

2.bp.blogspot.com

quizilla.teennick.com

He got better!
 
2013-03-16 12:05:23 PM  
I died. It sucked. I don't plan to do it again. I figure that I don't have to since I already got it done and out of the way.
 
2013-03-16 01:04:44 PM  
Half an hour without oxygen? He's dead, let him go.
 
2013-03-16 01:12:38 PM  
Don't forget there's also the living dead.

scienceblogs.com

/they're all messed up
 
2013-03-16 01:19:33 PM  
If there were administering CPR during the 30 minutes, it is not accurate to say that his brain was without oxygen for thirty minutes.  It was deprived of oxygen, so there is still likely some damage.  But if your brain had no oxygen for thirty minutes, there would be nothing left to revive.
 
2013-03-16 01:30:27 PM  

Ivo Shandor: Alan Robertson said: "He had a massive heart attack. It took half an hour to resuscitate him, so he had half an hour with no oxygen to his brain. We don't know if he's going to pull through, but he is still alive."

Also technically still alive:
[1.bp.blogspot.com image 400x598]


"Call any vegetable, and the chances are good...."

"That the vegetable will respond to you."
 
2013-03-16 03:10:00 PM  
So he was only mostly dead?
 
2013-03-16 03:39:18 PM  
30 minutes... but CPR is so INNEFECTIVE! DNR!
 
2013-03-16 03:48:54 PM  
Sheesh...if I'm 78 and drop to the floor, just let me go, man, because man, I'm gone.
 
2013-03-16 04:08:41 PM  
Oi, not so fast, Jack Flash!
/Obscure?
 
2013-03-16 04:49:11 PM  
t.qkme.me
 
2013-03-16 11:20:53 PM  
Rufus Lee King:

I was actually dead for a minute. I didn't see a white tunnel, though; only a black one.

Racist?



Not at all. The reason the tunnel was black was they have to shut the furnaces down once a week for standard maintenance.
 
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