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(KHOU Houston)   All hell breaks loose when an overprotective helicopter mom spots a cleaning crew employee in the parking lot of her children's school and automatically assumes he's an armed lunatic hellbent on snuffing the life out of every student   (khou.com) divider line 38
    More: Silly, Harris County Sheriff's Office, lockdowns  
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14365 clicks; posted to Main » on 16 Mar 2013 at 10:20 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Archived thread
2013-03-16 10:32:30 AM
8 votes:
Giving birth to a helicopter is bound to make a woman cranky....
gja [TotalFark]
2013-03-16 10:45:08 AM
6 votes:

John the Magnificent: When I was young Americans were thought of as courageous.

WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO YOU PEOPLE?


Many of us still are. I don't cocoon my daughter this way.
CSB:
I went to a shop that I didn't want my daughter to come with me to, and since it was my day to have her there was no options.
Left her in the car, with the door locked. 3 minutes later some dumb blonde is in my grill blabbing about "..you left her in that car alone?... etc/soforth"
Finally got a word in edgewise, motioned for my kid to roll down her window and told her to tell the woman what I taught her.
My kid holds up my 5D-cell maglight and says "daddy told me if anyone messes with us I'm allowed to knock their brains out!".
Stupid blonde just stands there with her pie-hole hung open and walks slowly away.
I say "that's daddy's girl, wanna get Carvel?"
/CSB

Not all of us are pansies.
2013-03-16 10:26:23 AM
6 votes:
If she was armed, she could of taken him out, just in case.
2013-03-16 10:42:49 AM
3 votes:

mr_a: I can't imagine why it would take the cops 16 minutes to get there. Maybe they were off investigating some other wild-goose chase called in by a different hysterical mother?


Dispatcher:  911. What's your emergency?
Mom: I just dropped little Johnny off at school and there's a man in the parking lot who looks suspicious.
Dispatcher: In case we need to call you back, what's your number?
Mom: xxx-xxx-xxxx.
Dispatcher: Which school are you at?
Mom: blah blah
Dispatcher: Why does the man look suspicious?
Mom: He's pacing back and forth in the parking lot.
Dispatcher: Does he have any weapons?
Mom: I can't see any at the moment. But he looks dangerous.
Dispatcher: What exactly is he doing?
Mom: He's pacing back and forth in the parking lot and looks very anxious.  I'm very scared for my son's safety now.
Dispatcher: Is he moving towards you or your son?
Mom: No, he's just staying in the parking lot! PLEASE. DO SOMETHING!!
2013-03-16 10:39:59 AM
3 votes:
Someone thought of the children!
2013-03-16 11:49:41 AM
2 votes:

Secret Master of All Flatulence: superlawyergirl: rumpelstiltskin: It's Texas. I expect a law will be proposed allowing two year olds to bring guns to school.

I'm pretty sure they're considering something similar the next legislative session. Seems we can't get over not being the first state to allow teachers to arm themselves.

Right.  Obviously, we can't trust teachers with a gun.  In that case, if they're so untrustworthy, WHY ARE WE TRUSTING THEM WITH OUR CHILDREN in the first place???


People usually don't die when someone fires a child at them.
2013-03-16 11:01:23 AM
2 votes:
Primrose School at Barkers Cypress? I don't think I've ever seen a punchable school name before.

/except Duke
2013-03-16 10:35:18 AM
2 votes:
This reads like an Onion article.
2013-03-16 10:25:35 AM
2 votes:
When I was young Americans were thought of as courageous.

WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO YOU PEOPLE?
2013-03-16 09:55:48 AM
2 votes:
Atchison questioned the deputy. "I said I've been on the phone with you for 13 minutes and you're just now getting here? He said 'we've been kind of busy pulling a body out of a lake.' I left. I couldn't handle it anymore." Atchison said. No one likes to talk about the "what if," but Atchison believes she got a glimpse and it scares her even more.

Your overblown hysteria only wasted the time and effort of half the town, so naturally your response is to become even more paranoid.
2013-03-16 02:28:52 PM
1 votes:
i48.tinypic.com
2013-03-16 01:38:09 PM
1 votes:

Zelron: Because a car isn't designed to kill.  And we make laws about owning them, keeping them safely maintained, requiring insurance (not all states I suppose).  They're constantly improving safety.  My kids rode in legally required car seats and booster seats.

If guns were made so they couldn't shoot people then I'd have less of a problem with them.  Their sole purpose is to kill.

Cars are used for their intended purpose every day.  It's more likely to be used for its intended purpose than to have a fatal accident.

A gun in the house is more likely to injure someone in the house than to be used to protect someone in the house.

My father-in-law accidentally discharged his handgun in his house twice.  Once was within an hour have having taken a refresher safety class.
My mother-in-law left hers in a changing room in a store (which fortunately she retrieved before it was found by someone else).
I had a friend who blew his head off on purpose.  Perhaps if he hadn't had access to a gun he wouldn't have killed himself.
My father almost took out his eye with a .22 rifle when he shot a rock and a chip came back at him. (Yes, he shouldn't have been shooting at a rock).
A friend of mine almost killed his brother (fortunately the friend was paying attention).  He was loading a double barreled shotgun when his brother walked in front of him.  So my friend turned before closing the breech and both barrels went off.  The pins were too far down.
I have other relatives who own guns (as did my father).  I have friends who own guns.
With all of this, NONE of them have ever been in a situation where having a gun would have protected them.  One perhaps would still be alive.  My father received a minor injury, and my father-in-law had two (that I know of) opportunities to wound/kill someone.
I was shooting skeet once and my friend's friend was a police officer who handed me a shotgun with the safety off.

So, I don't think I'm paranoid when I agree with studies that show that you're more ...


Have you ever considered the possibility that your entire family are morons?
2013-03-16 01:23:40 PM
1 votes:

Mikey1969: gja: John the Magnificent: When I was young Americans were thought of as courageous.

WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO YOU PEOPLE?

Many of us still are. I don't cocoon my daughter this way.
CSB:
I went to a shop that I didn't want my daughter to come with me to, and since it was my day to have her there was no options.
Left her in the car, with the door locked. 3 minutes later some dumb blonde is in my grill blabbing about "..you left her in that car alone?... etc/soforth"
Finally got a word in edgewise, motioned for my kid to roll down her window and told her to tell the woman what I taught her.
My kid holds up my 5D-cell maglight and says "daddy told me if anyone messes with us I'm allowed to knock their brains out!".
Stupid blonde just stands there with her pie-hole hung open and walks slowly away.
I say "that's daddy's girl, wanna get Carvel?"
/CSB

Not all of us are pansies.

Nice, you took your kid to the porn shop... That's parenting right there.  ;-)


How do you take your kid to the internet?
2013-03-16 01:09:34 PM
1 votes:

mr_a: I can't imagine why it would take the cops 16 minutes to get there. Maybe they were off investigating some other wild-goose chase called in by a different hysterical mother?


FTFA:
"I said I've been on the phone with you for 13 minutes and you're just now getting here? He said 'we've been kind of busy pulling a body out of a lake.'

In other words, an actual goose...
2013-03-16 12:49:51 PM
1 votes:

offmymeds: FTA: He said 'we've been kind of busy pulling a body out of a lake.'

Sounds more interesting than a panicky parent.


"Wuhl, that person's already DEAD and MY CHILDREN are still ALIIIVE!"
2013-03-16 12:32:36 PM
1 votes:

Giltric: So you're saying that no new laws would prevent another Sandy Hook?

Good to know.


WTF?  Never said that.  NEVER.
2013-03-16 12:29:33 PM
1 votes:
Did he come to vipe zee vindows?
2013-03-16 12:28:48 PM
1 votes:

IronTom: Remove everybody's arms and legs.


img24.imageshack.us

Still a potential threat for biting.
2013-03-16 11:56:02 AM
1 votes:

Dazman51: Weeping Jesus on a cross....Ban all schools....Home school your kids till they are 18 then release them on the world...


Actually, most home schoolers have jobs as teens and spend a great deal of time around adults learning how to act like adults. Younger children are around older children and learn to socialize with a wide age range. ITs been my experience that your average home schooler is more mature than their public school peers.
2013-03-16 11:29:55 AM
1 votes:

Marcintosh: is the guy on death row yet?


Nah... his IQ test came back too high.
2013-03-16 11:22:00 AM
1 votes:

MikeSass: It took the cops 16 minuters to get there...now you know why having responsible citizens carry guns is a good idea.


Oh my little troll, how I've missed you so.
2013-03-16 11:17:14 AM
1 votes:

The_Gallant_Gallstone: John the Magnificent: WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO YOU PEOPLE?

Are you telling me that 9/11 didn't change everything?

9/11 changed everything...


Can it even dye my eyes to match my gown?
2013-03-16 11:16:47 AM
1 votes:

superlawyergirl: She's considered paranoid and annoying because she was wrong, but what if her suspicions were correct?

I don't support the spread of widespread paranoia, but, if a mother saw something suspicious at a school, didn't say anything out of fear of being called "paranoid", and tons of kids died from the subsequent rampage, she'd be crucified.


Crucified? Well, it is God's plan. Who are you to expect anything?
2013-03-16 11:00:47 AM
1 votes:

Broktun: Remember back in late 2001 when anyone who looked middle-eastern was a terrorist?


Good times.
2013-03-16 10:57:23 AM
1 votes:
Lemme guess, Mom was white and the guy who seemed "suspicious" was black.
2013-03-16 10:54:48 AM
1 votes:

ReapTheChaos: So it never occurred to anyone to walk out and ask the guy what he was doing there?


No, no, no! You just know he's going to shoot you as soon as you approach.
Haven't you learned anything?
Do not approach strangers! They are out to kill kill kill!
Better to curl up, hide and be afraid.
You obviously need to watch more television, so you know what's going on in the real world.
2013-03-16 10:48:38 AM
1 votes:
"Hey, you!  Where'd you get that saxophone?"

"...Sears."

"GET HIM!!!"
2013-03-16 10:42:58 AM
1 votes:
Other than being someone she didn't know, I don't see what the guy did that was suspicious.  I can just imagine what that 911 call sounded like.  "Someone has to get here quick!  My God now he's getting keys out of his pocket!!  We're all going to be killed!!"
2013-03-16 10:40:42 AM
1 votes:
No mention yet if the guy was hispanic, black, or asian.
2013-03-16 10:39:43 AM
1 votes:
Woman will eventually decide to run for office because nobody is bothering to protect our children.

She'll spend over 20 years in office making laws and regulations about having appointments with schools and submitting to body cavity searches before you enter school property.

She will be lauded as a hero. Will respond with "I"M NOT A 6th GRADER, I'VE SEEN SUSPICIOUS PEOPLE WAITING IN SCHOOL PARKING LOTS" when questioned about her goals and knowledge.
2013-03-16 10:37:05 AM
1 votes:

ReapTheChaos: So it never occurred to anyone to walk out and ask the guy what he was doing there?


That's crazy talk.
2013-03-16 10:33:04 AM
1 votes:
So it never occurred to anyone to walk out and ask the guy what he was doing there?
2013-03-16 10:27:02 AM
1 votes:

John the Magnificent: WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO YOU PEOPLE?


Are you telling me that 9/11 didn't change everything?

9/11 changed everything...
2013-03-16 10:22:22 AM
1 votes:
People see strange people at schools as a threat because that is what they expect.

They need to fulfill their preconceived notions.

It is humanity. We are paranoid by nature and the recent string of shootings have made it even worse. I cant really fault her much because that is what the parent is supposed to expect in this country now.
2013-03-16 10:21:58 AM
1 votes:
Remove everybody's arms and legs.
2013-03-16 09:53:38 AM
1 votes:
It's Texas. I expect a law will be proposed allowing two year olds to bring guns to school.
2013-03-16 09:35:45 AM
1 votes:
"The safety of the children is a major priority compared to having a vehicle stolen or a house broken into," said mother Krystal Turbeville.

Until it's *her* vehicle or house.
2013-03-16 09:21:10 AM
1 votes:
I can't imagine why it would take the cops 16 minutes to get there. Maybe they were off investigating some other wild-goose chase called in by a different hysterical mother?
 
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