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(io9)   ♫ Spider beard, spider beard, does whatever a spider beard does ♫   (io9.com) divider line 40
    More: Strange  
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9144 clicks; posted to Main » on 15 Mar 2013 at 9:01 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



40 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-03-15 08:30:50 PM
Forget the beard, that dude is RIPPED!
 
2013-03-15 09:02:43 PM

AdolfOliverPanties: Forget the beard, that dude is RIPPED!


For realz. His abs go all the way up his chest.
 
2013-03-15 09:05:53 PM
He makes my Hampton Wick very, very hard to ignore.
 
2013-03-15 09:05:56 PM
You call that a "spider beard"?

news.bbcimg.co.uk
 
2013-03-15 09:06:30 PM
i.imgur.com
 
2013-03-15 09:16:22 PM
Huh, I thought that was Tobey Maguire at first.
 
2013-03-15 09:24:18 PM
Spider beard? If this isn't a story about Kelly Preston I'm suing for false advertising.
 
2013-03-15 09:24:31 PM

Dwedit:


I did not need that
 
2013-03-15 09:28:45 PM
not a real spider beard until you hatch a brood out out of your everlovin pores.
 
2013-03-15 09:29:35 PM
I would totally smack him with a shoe.
 
2013-03-15 09:34:03 PM
At first, I thought this was going to be about spiders living on a man's face. Or gay spiders.

This is what Fark has done to me.
 
2013-03-15 09:37:30 PM
Is this a spider thread? I have an awesome spider story. You may have read it in another spider thread!

I was smoking and reading a book on the back porch late one night when I lived with my mom and it was well after midnight. I felt something brush my cheek and just wiped it away and didn't think anything of it. A few moments later it was back and I brushed again. After the third time I was getting suspicious, so I looked up to my left there, slowly falling towards me like like they're Easy Company and the rest of the 101st airborne parachuting into France, is a large cloud of black widow babies falling at me. I was pretty freaked out for the rest of the night and would randomly start brushing myself furiously when I felt anything.

/other than that I love spiders, they kill real bugs so I don't have to
//csb
 
2013-03-15 09:40:42 PM

ArtosRC: At first, I thought this was going to be about spiders living on a man's face. Or gay spiders.

This is what Fark has done to me.


actually I thought it said spider bread & was repulsed.
 
2013-03-15 09:45:25 PM
Which is what, exactly, subby?
 
2013-03-15 09:56:49 PM

CalamitousCrasher: Huh, I thought that was Tobey Maguire at first.


seconded.
 
2013-03-15 09:58:31 PM

Clock Spider Jerusalem: not a real spider beard until you hatch a brood out out of your everlovin pores.


The Believers (1987)
Does This Look Infected?


Oblig.
 
2013-03-15 09:59:01 PM
Nope.  Nope nope nope.

/Nope.
 
2013-03-15 10:00:35 PM

Dwedit: [i.imgur.com image 478x598]


Aren't those daddy longlegs? That's actually sort of cool. I would let them crawl all over me wherever they wanted and... Pardon me, I'll be in my bunk.
 
2013-03-15 10:01:51 PM
img.photobucket.com
 
2013-03-15 10:05:07 PM

sprag: [img.photobucket.com image 376x332]


that there is my spirit animal
 
2013-03-15 10:06:09 PM
Liza Minelli just married a gay spider.
 
2013-03-15 10:09:36 PM
teamrad.files.wordpress.com

My beard is a windmill; your argument is invalid.
 
2013-03-15 10:20:45 PM

Clock Spider Jerusalem: sprag: [img.photobucket.com image 376x332]

that there is my spirit animal


It doesn't get as much use as it used to, which is kind of a shame.
 
2013-03-15 10:37:17 PM
Meh.
 
2013-03-15 11:19:56 PM
Spider beard...I read this and thought "WTF?  Is this like a bee beard?  Is this a case where a boy spider and another boy spider love each other very, very much and one has a female mate solely for keeping up appearances?"

But no, just a guy with a very waxed beard that looks spidery.

I declare this spider thread and hope to see some jumping spiders, damnit :D

/actually saw the first black widow of the season today...wouldn't have minded except she was right by the door to get in, so she had to go
//My spider rules: Brown recluse spiders get to die in a fire.  Black widows are tolerated as long as they are far away from human habitation (i.e. can't walk in with us--backyards are OK, if it's not where humans will stick their hands in a web by accident) and are not welcome on toilet seats.  Other spiders are welcome outside but not inside (due to SO having an allergy to spider venom--were it not for this, they'd be allowed inside within reason)--they eat the bugs I really don't want indoors, and we do get the occasional orb-weaver who makes the occasional gift of Outdoor Spider Art Best Appreciated In Mornings.  Tiny adorable Tachikoma-esque jumping spiders are fully welcome and overtly encouraged because hey, Nature's tiny Tachikomas :D
 
2013-03-15 11:30:56 PM
Spider man meme headline,
spider man meme headline,
does whatever a spider man meme
headline does
 
2013-03-15 11:56:42 PM

SockMonkeyHolocaust: Liza Minelli just married a gay spider.


Again?
 
2013-03-15 11:59:09 PM
I know that dude.  Chad your Internet famous.
 
2013-03-16 01:06:33 AM
we_spiderman_now.jpg
 
2013-03-16 02:12:33 AM
Triangle man. Triangle man. Triangle man hates spider beard man. They have a fight. Triangle wins. Triangle man.
 
2013-03-16 04:59:55 AM

X_Raraavis: I know that dude.  Chad your Internet famous.


and he is a farker

rva beard league represent!
 
2013-03-16 09:20:01 AM
I admit.. I just woke up and read that as Spider Bread, which sounds way more interesting than spider beard.
 
2013-03-16 11:07:42 AM
Sprag:Thanks for the obligatory pic of the infamous 'spider clock' image. I expect nothing less from fellow farkers.

Now I await the subsequent, follicularly themed image of 'woman scaping' wherein her landing strip is similarly fashioned 'rancid halibut' formation. At least that'd be a valid, applicable visual that co-aligns with the actual encounter/interaction.
 
2013-03-16 03:36:29 PM
I thought it said, Spider Cider Has Canker Wanker in Bristol Pistol, so I was all like, WTF dude, but then I was all like, where are my glasses.

I was told there would be bread.
 
2013-03-16 11:03:19 PM
Thank god, I afraid it was going to be a beard made out of spiders.
 
2013-03-16 11:42:39 PM
1.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-03-17 01:34:49 AM
Whatever, scary spider people. These exist. Your argument is invalid.

lh5.ggpht.com
 
2013-03-17 01:39:52 AM
That was actually less impressive than the image the headline gave me, which was a beard woven into a basket with a live tarantula inside.
 
2013-03-17 02:07:45 AM

ArtosRC: At first, I thought this was going to be about spiders living on a man's face. Or gay spiders.


It's the gay spiders who need beards.
 
2013-03-17 10:04:16 AM

ciberido: ArtosRC: At first, I thought this was going to be about spiders living on a man's face. Or gay spiders.

It's the gay scientologist spiders who need beards.

 
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