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(The New York Times)   What's on your nightstand? A good book? A phone charger? Maybe your 3-hp electric vibrator?   (nytimes.com) divider line 217
    More: Interesting, National Sleep Foundation, Connecticut College, Good Vibrations, art collectors, sleep apnea, Pew Research  
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13536 clicks; posted to Main » on 15 Mar 2013 at 6:37 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-03-15 03:29:46 PM
Clock radio, light, 3' tall stuffed penguin.  At night add a book and cellphone.
 
2013-03-15 03:38:48 PM
A cpap and a clock radio. no room for anything else.
 
2013-03-15 03:42:55 PM
At 5 in the morning, each morning, my cat sits on the nightstand and knocks everything off until I get up and feed her.

Sometimes she gets way up on the dresser and knocks my money clip on the floor so the dogs can eat all my money:(
/happened twice in the last 2 months
//puts money in the drawer now
 
2013-03-15 04:07:49 PM
Lamp, clock, tissues (no, for my nose, Jesus), almost always a book, and my phone and glasses while I'm asleep.  Book sits on the clock.
 
2013-03-15 04:53:47 PM
I have two nightstands, one on the left side of my bed, the other on the right side. The one on the left side has a couple of stacks of books and my alarm clock. The one on the right has a lamp and a box of Kleenex on it, plus it has three drawers where I keep underwear, socks and miscellaneous personal papers. At night my phone is plugged into the charger & goes on the left hand night stand, my glasses on the right hand nightstand.
 
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2013-03-15 05:19:28 PM
Light, clock, water, non-Kleenex brand facial tissues, books I have not been reading. My phone does not come into my bedroom.

One "nightstand" has drawers with clothes and condoms if I'm feeling lucky.

/not that lucky
 
2013-03-15 05:23:33 PM
a smaller nightstand.
 
2013-03-15 05:23:59 PM
In before "Glock."
 
2013-03-15 05:25:32 PM

ZAZ: One "nightstand" has drawers with clothes and condoms if I'm feeling lucky.


PSA: Check the expiration date on the condoms, they're only good for 10 years or so.
 
2013-03-15 05:26:03 PM
A clock, a lamp and a big tube of anal lube.
 
2013-03-15 05:26:03 PM
a ton of shiat: Clock, phone, hand lotion, advil, tissues, nail file, books, lip balm, hair bands, birth control pills, vitamins, glasses that I haven't needed since I got my eyes fixed in October, the dead sea scrolls, and a pencil.
 
2013-03-15 05:40:31 PM
how exactly does one measure the horsepower of an electric vibrator?
 
2013-03-15 05:40:53 PM
A Justin Bieber action figure.
 
2013-03-15 05:41:16 PM
Your moms panties

\why did this take so long
\\ disappointed in the lot of you
\\\three slashies
 
2013-03-15 05:52:54 PM
When I left for work this morning, there was a lamp and a clock radio on my nightstand

/I'm sure those are now on the floor, having been replaced by a happily sleeping cat
 
2013-03-15 05:54:50 PM
Two empty bottles of Jameson, a crumpled pack of cigarettes and a bottle of Aspirin.
 
2013-03-15 06:02:02 PM
The wife and I have a nightstand on both sides of the bed too, but I don't know what's on her stand as I'm not invited over!
 
2013-03-15 06:02:17 PM

Timmy the Tumor: how exactly does one measure the horsepower of an electric vibrator?


You just gotta turn that sucker on and test it out. Believe me, us ladies know the power of vibrators.
 
2013-03-15 06:10:57 PM
That last comment was intended for Ms. Mapes.

/reply button is not working... stupid tablet
 
2013-03-15 06:12:12 PM
"Maybe your 3-hp electric vibrator?"

Guilty as charged.

/Has several vibes on her nightstand. :)
 
2013-03-15 06:17:14 PM
img841.imageshack.us

My clock blinking after a brief power outage.

/very funny people at the power company
 
2013-03-15 06:19:44 PM

sn82: Timmy the Tumor: how exactly does one measure the horsepower of an electric vibrator?

You just gotta turn that sucker on and test it out. Believe me, us ladies know the power of vibrators.


Laughing.  Although around here, you can tell most of the vibrator users/testers by the chipped teeth.
 
2013-03-15 06:28:00 PM

Timmy the Tumor: sn82: Timmy the Tumor: how exactly does one measure the horsepower of an electric vibrator?

You just gotta turn that sucker on and test it out. Believe me, us ladies know the power of vibrators.

Laughing.  Although around here, you can tell most of the vibrator users/testers by the chipped teeth.


Think... they're doing it really wrong.
 
2013-03-15 06:30:14 PM

AlwaysRightBoy: The wife and I have a nightstand on both sides of the bed too, but I don't know what's on her stand as I'm not invited over!


That bites.
 
2013-03-15 06:33:54 PM

Godscrack: [img841.imageshack.us image 684x556]

My clock blinking after a brief power outage.

/very funny people at the power company


That's Latin! Honey, bring me the holy water!
 
2013-03-15 06:38:39 PM
Our surgeons did what they could, but it took them two hours just to get the smile off his face.
 
2013-03-15 06:39:29 PM
Wireless charger built into my desk
 
2013-03-15 06:40:55 PM
My nightstand is two upside down milk crates. All that I have on them is my alarm clock.
 
2013-03-15 06:43:17 PM
On my nightstand:  An eye-shade and a pair of reading glasses.

On her her nightstand:  A pile or dusty crap.


Don't ask what's inside it . . . I neither know nor want to know.

/ all the "dirty stuff" is in in mine for some reason.
 
2013-03-15 06:43:54 PM
3 HP? Do you have a VFD with it it to ramp it up? Or do you just ram rod it across the line?
 
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2013-03-15 06:44:10 PM
ZAZ: One "nightstand" has drawers with clothes and condoms if I'm feeling lucky.
Snotnose: PSA: Check the expiration date on the condoms, they're only good for 10 years or so.

I replace them when required. I once had a woman who asked if they were still good. She was just looking for any excuse not to go to bed with me and I was prepared to deny her that excuse.

She didn't go to bed with me, but she had no excuse.
 
Rat
2013-03-15 06:45:37 PM

BarkingUnicorn: In before "Glock."


Sig, iPhone, flashlight, boner pills

©
 
2013-03-15 06:46:28 PM
My vibrator is a diesel/pneumatic modified jack hammer.
 
2013-03-15 06:46:44 PM
How the hell can you see in my bedroom, creepersubby?
 
2013-03-15 06:50:04 PM

GAT_00: Lamp, clock, tissues (no, for my nose, Jesus), almost always a book, and my phone and glasses while I'm asleep.  Book sits on the clock.


You named your nose 'Jesus'?

/Jesus
 
2013-03-15 06:51:10 PM

Timmy the Tumor: how exactly does one measure the horsepower of an electric vibrator?


Is it as big as a horse?
 
2013-03-15 06:52:42 PM
You people have nightstands?!
 
2013-03-15 06:52:48 PM
.357 and a roofing hammer.

/lives in FL
 
2013-03-15 06:53:13 PM
Stack of stroke mags and some crusty socks...
 
2013-03-15 06:54:17 PM

WhippingBoy: Stack of stroke mags and some crusty socks...


You need a dog

/still lives in FL
 
2013-03-15 06:55:10 PM
actually dont have a night stand, never have
 
2013-03-15 06:55:20 PM

Satanic panic in the attic: 3 HP? Do you have a VFD with it it to ramp it up? Or do you just ram rod it across the line?


The more important question is what it cost to have a special outlet and breaker installed in the bedroom for the 3hp vibrator. That's like 23 amps worth of vibrating pleasure. Good for them!
 
2013-03-15 06:55:32 PM
Coaster, cat hair, empty cup, ass lube, athlete's foot cream, cat hair, bottle of wintergreen, wallet, cat hair, watch, spectacles, foot lotion, sunburn lotion, KY jelly, cat hair, cat, nail clippers, dagger, 3 books, cat hair, jewelry box, a lamp, Mrs. Smurf's panties on the lamp, 4 remotes and a couple ace bandages.

It's not a nightstand, it's a repurposed table.  With a cat bed under it.
 
2013-03-15 06:55:57 PM
Divorced for 2 years, no night stand, no furniture (unless you count lawn chairs), no mess, no money (well, no real money, farkin biatch), no headaches and I kept the big screen plasma. No worries, no hang ups, no issues and the half your age plus 7 years is an awesome code. Thank god for little blue pills.

/what was the question?
 
2013-03-15 06:56:16 PM

Timmy the Tumor: how exactly does one measure the horsepower of an electric vibrator?


its got a gear shift and a tachometer.
 
2013-03-15 06:56:54 PM
Your moms false teeth.
 
2013-03-15 06:57:50 PM
If you live in earthquake country and don't have a dependable flashlight on your nightstand you should get one.
 
2013-03-15 06:57:56 PM
Electric? Champs have the gas powered one like from eurotrip.
 
2013-03-15 06:59:08 PM
TinyFist:
The more important question is what it cost to have a special outlet and breaker installed in the bedroom for the 3hp vibrator. That's like 23 amps worth of vibrating pleasure. Good for them!

Mebe it came with its own genset?
 
2013-03-15 06:59:13 PM
Lamp, clock, water bottle, lint roller, nail clippers, tums, ibuprofen and a couple of books.
 
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