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(Huffington Post)   Not this shiat again. Another Carnival cruise ship disaster maybe just around the poop deck. No, not that one. Or that one. This time it's the Legend   (huffingtonpost.com) divider line 136
    More: Dumbass, fairs, legends, St. Maarten  
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11133 clicks; posted to Main » on 15 Mar 2013 at 11:00 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-03-15 09:45:31 AM
soon Carnival will have to start paying the passengers to go on their cruises.
 
2013-03-15 09:51:09 AM
I'm no fan of Carnival, but this is starting to sound less like coincidence and more like deliberate sabotage.
 
2013-03-15 09:51:36 AM
Another other troubled ship, the Dream, was finishing a Caribbean cruise when it suffered a mechanical issue with a diesel generator. Power was not lost, but elevators and restrooms periodically lost electricity.

Rather than sail home to Cape Canaveral, Florida some 4,300 passengers will be flown home from St. Maarten, the company said.

Two ships actually.

I think I'm pretty much done with cruise ships for a while, especially Carnival. Cruises are totally overrated and not a great place to meet attractive people who aren't just married.

I went on the Dream a few years back, btw. Certain parts of the ship, like I dunno, the whole top of the ship where people go up to sunbathe and hang out, smelled like raw sewage all the time. Not a pleasant experience. Oh the ship was about 6 months old when I sailed it. This was, btw, a design flaw. Makes you wonder what other things they screwed up.
 
2013-03-15 09:53:51 AM

bdub77: Makes you wonder what other things they screwed up.


The more they break down, the less we'll have to wonder.
 
vpb [TotalFark]
2013-03-15 09:54:21 AM
I think it must be a design flaw in the generators,  There are six diesel generators and two electric motors.  I don't understand how a problem in a single "backup generator" could take out the entire propulsion system and cut hotel power.
 
2013-03-15 09:54:43 AM
This time a ship called Legend is having a problem with a unit that affects its sailing speed,

Was the accelerator pedal stuck?

Did they try shifting into neutral? Or pulling the key out of the ignition?

I've only been on one cruise in my life and it was Carnival. It was okay - no problems, but then again that was last century.
 
2013-03-15 10:06:45 AM
I know, lets build a hotel that floats, then put 4000 people in the middle of the ocean and hope the pumps keep working.
 
vpb [TotalFark]
2013-03-15 10:18:05 AM
Looking at the Wikipedia entry, this is normal for the Legend.
 
2013-03-15 10:20:48 AM
The Legend lives on from the East Coast on down
of the cruise line they call "Glitchy Pooey."
The line, it is said, makes you feel half dead
when the toilets back up every Tuesday.
With a gurgle and roar 4300 bums more
than the Carnival Legend weighed empty,
that good ship and true was great floating sewer
when the "Squirts of November" came early.
 
2013-03-15 10:23:24 AM
I was just on the Carnival Miracle out of New York recently and we didn't any problems at all, but this cruise line is having a lot of problems with their fleet as of late.

/ was parked next to the Dream (that's stuck in St. Maarten ) at Cape Canaveral. Quite a large ship compared to the Miracle
// usually a Holland American cruiser because old people are more fun than a bunch bratty kids running around everywhere
 
2013-03-15 10:24:37 AM

Snarfangel: The Legend lives on from the East Coast on down
of the cruise line they call "Glitchy Pooey."
The line, it is said, makes you feel half dead
when the toilets back up every Tuesday.
With a gurgle and roar 4300 bums more
than the Carnival Legend weighed empty,
that good ship and true was great floating sewer
when the "Squirts of November" came early.


*golf clap*
 
2013-03-15 10:27:19 AM

Snarfangel: The Legend lives on from the East Coast on down
of the cruise line they call "Glitchy Pooey."
The line, it is said, makes you feel half dead
when the toilets back up every Tuesday.
With a gurgle and roar 4300 bums more
than the Carnival Legend weighed empty,
that good ship and true was great floating sewer
when the "Squirts of November" came early.


Whar funny button? Whar?
 
2013-03-15 10:31:55 AM
i105.photobucket.com
What a Legend with pacing problems and a horrible ending might look like.
 
2013-03-15 10:34:25 AM

FloydA: [i105.photobucket.com image 600x314]
What a Legend with pacing problems and a horrible ending might look like.


Why do I have this urge to 'shop Leonardo DiCaprio into that picture?
 
2013-03-15 10:48:45 AM

Snarfangel: The Legend lives on from the East Coast on down
of the cruise line they call "Glitchy Pooey."
The line, it is said, makes you feel half dead
when the toilets back up every Tuesday.
With a gurgle and roar 4300 bums more
than the Carnival Legend weighed empty,
that good ship and true was great floating sewer
when the "Squirts of November" came early.


nothing like a nice folk ballad about poop.

+1 internets to you
 
2013-03-15 11:02:01 AM

SmackLT: I'm no fan of Carnival, but this is starting to sound less like coincidence and more like deliberate sabotage.

 constant neglect.
 
2013-03-15 11:02:53 AM
That's why I always recommend going on gay cruises. You NEVER hear about gay ones having problems getting stuck, or poop dripping, or things burning
 
2013-03-15 11:03:50 AM

SmackLT: I'm no fan of Carnival, but this is starting to sound less like coincidence and more like deliberate sabotage.


Nah.  Never ascribe to malice that which can be more easily attributed to incompetence.

Sounds to me like Carnival has been cutting corners on mechanical maintenance to save money.  I'm sure the doofus MBA who thought of the idea while still get a big bonus check though.
 
2013-03-15 11:05:10 AM

vpb: Looking at the Wikipedia entry, this is normal for the Legend.


It's interesting that the thing was built in Finland.  Getting that across the Atlantic can't have been a fun trip for the Captain.

/I assume they bring it across when the weather is good
 
2013-03-15 11:05:19 AM
Watch for a Carnival corporate rebranding effort in the next 6-8 months.
 
2013-03-15 11:05:27 AM
Look to the media to report every small out of the norm thing that happens on a carnival cruise for awhile.   No different after a plane "incident" where we get news stories about said airline having blown tires during landing or other very routine glitches.
 
2013-03-15 11:05:45 AM

Snarfangel: The Legend lives on from the East Coast on down
of the cruise line they call "Glitchy Pooey."
The line, it is said, makes you feel half dead
when the toilets back up every Tuesday.
With a gurgle and roar 4300 bums more
than the Carnival Legend weighed empty,
that good ship and true was great floating sewer
when the "Squirts of November" came early.


You win all the internets for the rest of the month.
 
2013-03-15 11:07:42 AM
They keep up and at this rate the company known as Carnival will be a Ledgend
 
2013-03-15 11:08:00 AM
Going on a Carnival cruise is still technically classified as "vacation", right?
 
2013-03-15 11:08:13 AM

SmackLT: I'm no fan of Carnival, but this is starting to sound less like coincidence and more like deliberate sabotage.


Sounds more like some executives decided to cut maintenance a few years back to increase profits.
 
2013-03-15 11:08:27 AM

ha-ha-guy: vpb: Looking at the Wikipedia entry, this is normal for the Legend.

It's interesting that the thing was built in Finland.  Getting that across the Atlantic can't have been a fun trip for the Captain.

/I assume they bring it across when the weather is good


? People sail much smaller vessels than that across the Atlantic all the time without issue. I'm not a marine expert, but can you expand on why crossing the Atlantic with a cruise ship would be difficult?
 
2013-03-15 11:09:45 AM

HMS_Blinkin: Sounds to me like Carnival has been cutting corners on mechanical maintenance to save money. I'm sure the doofus MBA who thought of the idea while still get a big bonus check though.


Yup.
 
2013-03-15 11:09:59 AM
Perhaps they could recover some of their losses by having the never season of Survivor on one of their ships?
 
2013-03-15 11:10:19 AM

Pants full of macaroni!!: Snarfangel: The Legend lives on from the East Coast on down
of the cruise line they call "Glitchy Pooey."
The line, it is said, makes you feel half dead
when the toilets back up every Tuesday.
With a gurgle and roar 4300 bums more
than the Carnival Legend weighed empty,
that good ship and true was great floating sewer
when the "Squirts of November" came early.

You win all the internets for the rest of the month.


Stop, guys, I'm flushing.

Blushing, I mean. Blushing.
 
2013-03-15 11:10:51 AM

FloydA: [i105.photobucket.com image 600x314]
What a Legend with pacing problems and a horrible ending might look like.


What a terrible, terrible movie =(
 
2013-03-15 11:11:26 AM

Cluckity: ? People sail much smaller vessels than that across the Atlantic all the time without issue. I'm not a marine expert, but can you expand on why crossing the Atlantic with a cruise ship would be difficult?


Quick answer:  http://misunderstoodmariner.blogspot.com/2009/07/ocean-liners-vs-crui s e-ships.html.  The wikipedia entry on cruise ships also gets it into in the introduction area.

/the Queen Mary 2 is the only ocean liner out there currently
 
2013-03-15 11:11:57 AM
Carnival Cruise Lines, from the same mentality that brought you Las Vegas and plastic stuffed titties.
 
2013-03-15 11:12:32 AM

hitlersbrain: Perhaps they could recover some of their losses by having the never season of Survivor on one of their ships?


lol

I'm stealing this joke.
 
2013-03-15 11:13:15 AM
jasonjeffrey.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-03-15 11:13:49 AM

hitlersbrain: Perhaps they could recover some of their losses by having the never next season of Survivor on one of their ships?


Thank you auto complete.
 
2013-03-15 11:14:24 AM
Are these things really just "suddenly" happening now and never happened before or is this the media reporting shiat that is actually common place and the new MSM outrage darling topic?
 
2013-03-15 11:15:20 AM

bdub77: I went on the Dream a few years back, btw. Certain parts of the ship, like I dunno, the whole top of the ship where people go up to sunbathe and hang out, smelled like raw sewage all the time. Not a pleasant experience. Oh the ship was about 6 months old when I sailed it. This was, btw, a design flaw. Makes you wonder what other things they screwed up.


So, design flaw = literal poop deck?
 
2013-03-15 11:16:47 AM

MaudlinMutantMollusk: FloydA: [i105.photobucket.com image 600x314]
What a Legend with pacing problems and a horrible ending might look like.

Why do I have this urge to 'shop Leonardo DiCaprio into that picture?


A film that taught me that even bridges can regenerate.
 
2013-03-15 11:17:36 AM

Snarfangel: Pants full of macaroni!!: Snarfangel: The Legend lives on from the East Coast on down
of the cruise line they call "Glitchy Pooey."
The line, it is said, makes you feel half dead
when the toilets back up every Tuesday.
With a gurgle and roar 4300 bums more
than the Carnival Legend weighed empty,
that good ship and true was great floating sewer
when the "Squirts of November" came early.

You win all the internets for the rest of the month.

Stop, guys, I'm flushing.

Blushing, I mean. Blushing.


Some yuk on the Straight Dope just reposted this, credit to you, under the title The Dreck on the Carnival Legend.
 
2013-03-15 11:17:48 AM
Never been on a cruise, pretty certain if I ever do, it WON'T be Carnival. Princess and Royal Caribbean haven't had 1/10th the problems Carnival has.

If I'm going to pay out the nose to sit on a deck and read overlooking the ocean, I'd better have working plumbing.
 
2013-03-15 11:18:38 AM

Master Sphincter: That's why I always recommend going on gay cruises. You NEVER hear about gay ones having problems getting stuck, or poop dripping, or things burning


But its a total sausage fest.
 
2013-03-15 11:19:41 AM
I told them Dr. Neville would make for a terrible ship but did they listen? Noooo they're too smart to make mistakes.

Morons
 
2013-03-15 11:20:02 AM
anyone holding stock in Carnival cruise lines may want to wipe their ass with it.
 
2013-03-15 11:21:11 AM

Feel_the_velvet: Going on a Carnival cruise is still technically classified as "vacation", right?


A cruise ship vacation is the only vacation where I counted the hours until it was over.

The second best part of that whole week was the terrible English abilities of someone on board lead me to take double the amount of Dramamine I should have and I spent almost 24 hours asleep.

The first was getting off if the ship and knowing I would take the life of another man rather than get onto one of those things ever again.
 
2013-03-15 11:21:47 AM
i218.photobucket.com
 
2013-03-15 11:21:50 AM
HMS_Blinkin:

Sounds to me like Carnival has been cutting corners on mechanical maintenance to save money.


Preeeee-cisely. New CEO? New CFO? Boss's son turned 25 and made it to upper management? Somewhere is a algorithm comparing costs of flying motherfarkers back from St. Maarten vs. costs of changing the oil on the generators.

For their sake, I hope they find the bottom soon.
 
2013-03-15 11:22:09 AM

FloydA: [i105.photobucket.com image 600x314]
What a Legend with pacing problems and a horrible ending might look like.


Man, everything went to sh*t in that movie when that dog died.
 
2013-03-15 11:22:13 AM

ha-ha-guy: Cluckity: ? People sail much smaller vessels than that across the Atlantic all the time without issue. I'm not a marine expert, but can you expand on why crossing the Atlantic with a cruise ship would be difficult?

Quick answer:  http://misunderstoodmariner.blogspot.com/2009/07/ocean-liners-vs-crui s e-ships.html.  The wikipedia entry on cruise ships also gets it into in the introduction area.

/the Queen Mary 2 is the only ocean liner out there currently


Also as a bit of a metaphor:
Most lake freighters on the Great Lakes are just glorified motorized barges (al la the Edmund Fitzgerald).  They tended to sink left and right for awhile.  However assuming my grasp of history is correctly, only three ocean going vessels have sunk in the Great Lakes.  Two of those went down due to collisions, one went down because it grounded and was damaged by a storm because it could be re floated.  Other "salties" suffered damage that would sink a lake freighter and went right on chugging along because they were built to a higher spec.  Or they'd ram into lake freighter, suffer a bit of bow damage, while the lake freighter would split in half and end up on the bottom of the lake.   Cruise ships are built a higher standard than an lake freighter, but they'll still far short of the standard used by stuff designed to weather serious storms, which is why many dick around theCaribbean.

/this is the Celia II, a cruise ship with one engine out encountering 30 foot waves: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eDTbopUYg20
//no thank you
 
2013-03-15 11:24:51 AM
So... Has the Carnival serial killer gotten bored with raping and throwing crew mates overboard or is this a new form of malfeasance?
 
2013-03-15 11:25:00 AM

Cluckity: ha-ha-guy: vpb: Looking at the Wikipedia entry, this is normal for the Legend.

It's interesting that the thing was built in Finland.  Getting that across the Atlantic can't have been a fun trip for the Captain.

/I assume they bring it across when the weather is good

? People sail much smaller vessels than that across the Atlantic all the time without issue. I'm not a marine expert, but can you expand on why crossing the Atlantic with a cruise ship would be difficult?


They are built to sail the Carribean only as they are flat bottomed (think sled). A trans Atlantic liner has more of a round bottom to slice through the seas.
 
2013-03-15 11:25:01 AM
encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com
 
2013-03-15 11:25:50 AM

Snarfangel: The Legend lives on from the East Coast on down
of the cruise line they call "Glitchy Pooey."
The line, it is said, makes you feel half dead
when the toilets back up every Tuesday.
With a gurgle and roar 4300 bums more
than the Carnival Legend weighed empty,
that good ship and true was great floating sewer
when the "Squirts of November" came early.


You're a bad person and you should feel bad for making me lol like that and making Gordon Lightfoot jokes.
 
2013-03-15 11:27:31 AM

Cluckity: ha-ha-guy: vpb: Looking at the Wikipedia entry, this is normal for the Legend.

It's interesting that the thing was built in Finland.  Getting that across the Atlantic can't have been a fun trip for the Captain.

/I assume they bring it across when the weather is good

? People sail much smaller vessels than that across the Atlantic all the time without issue. I'm not a marine expert, but can you expand on why crossing the Atlantic with a cruise ship would be difficult?


Icebergs?
 
2013-03-15 11:28:08 AM

Insatiable Jesus: Carnival Cruise Lines, from the same mentality that brought you Las Vegas and plastic stuffed titties.


You shut your whore mouth and you shut it right now!!!!
 
2013-03-15 11:28:17 AM
what a Carnival Cruise Passenger might look like...

i.imgur.com
 
2013-03-15 11:29:18 AM
How can we ever expect the moral and health issues surrounding factory farming to be taken seriously and fixed when people are paying Carnival thousands of dollars to be treated the same way?
 
2013-03-15 11:43:21 AM

Mateorocks: FloydA: [i105.photobucket.com image 600x314]
What a Legend with pacing problems and a horrible ending might look like.

Man, everything went to sh*t in that movie when that dog died.


The alternate ending at least redeems the movie a little...only a little though
 
2013-03-15 11:47:35 AM

SmackLT: I'm no fan of Carnival, but this is starting to sound less like coincidence and more like deliberate sabotage.


yeah, i too am gonna go with a culture of neglect within the company.
 
2013-03-15 11:52:06 AM

ha-ha-guy: Cluckity: ? People sail much smaller vessels than that across the Atlantic all the time without issue. I'm not a marine expert, but can you expand on why crossing the Atlantic with a cruise ship would be difficult?

Quick answer:  http://misunderstoodmariner.blogspot.com/2009/07/ocean-liners-vs-crui s e-ships.html.  The wikipedia entry on cruise ships also gets it into in the introduction area.

/the Queen Mary 2 is the only ocean liner out there currently


Right, but that doesn't mean that Cruise Ships are particularly difficult to navigate across open water. It's more like driving a school bus down the interstate.  Cruise ships are routinely shuffled around with the changing of seasons to areas where demand is greater.

A liner's got  a schedule to maintain, and can't deviate all that much for weather.  The cruise ship on a shuttle run can route around heavy seas.  "Back in the Day," weather predictions were much less accurate, where they existed at all.
 
2013-03-15 11:53:35 AM

SlothB77: SmackLT: I'm no fan of Carnival, but this is starting to sound less like coincidence and more like deliberate sabotage.

yeah, i too am gonna go with a culture of neglect within the company.


When you're paying people pennies and working them to death, it's not hard to imagine a disgruntled employee doing naughty things below decks...or even a whole conspiracy among many ships.
 
2013-03-15 11:55:10 AM

Deja_VooDoo: A liner's got  a schedule to maintain, and can't deviate all that much for weather.  The cruise ship on a shuttle run can route around heavy seas.


Five of them managed to get caught in Sandy IIRC.  One of the Disney ships was absolutely trashed.  It's all fun and games until someone farks up a weather report.
 
2013-03-15 11:55:53 AM
Could be worse
www.mysticjourneybookstore.com
 
2013-03-15 12:02:00 PM
ha-ha-guy:

It's interesting that the thing was built in Finland.  Getting that across the Atlantic can't have been a fun trip for the Captain.

/I assume they bring it across when the weather is good


Lot of them are built in Finland, although I think the other two Carnival ships that were in trouble were built in Italy. So you'd still need to sail across the Atlantic.

Actually, crossing the Danish straits might pose a bigger issue.

blogs.browardpalmbeach.com
 
2013-03-15 12:07:00 PM
There is a reason that in the Cruise business, Carnival is known ass the K Mart of the Caribbean
 
2013-03-15 12:09:07 PM

Snarfangel: The Legend lives on from the East Coast on down
of the cruise line they call "Glitchy Pooey."
The line, it is said, makes you feel half dead
when the toilets back up every Tuesday.
With a gurgle and roar 4300 bums more
than the Carnival Legend weighed empty,
that good ship and true was great floating sewer
when the "Squirts of November" came early.


Winner!!
 
2013-03-15 12:10:20 PM
Maybe (not holding my breath) Carnival will start paying attention to the check engine light on all of their ships.

www.alwayscourteouscarcare.com
 
2013-03-15 12:11:06 PM
I work for a rival cruise liner, and I am laughing my ass off right now.
 
2013-03-15 12:11:39 PM
This time a ship called Legend is having a problem with a unit that affects its sailing speed ...............

i.imgur.com
 
2013-03-15 12:11:50 PM
1.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-03-15 12:12:45 PM

Snarfangel: The Legend lives on from the East Coast on down
of the cruise line they call "Glitchy Pooey."
The line, it is said, makes you feel half dead
when the toilets back up every Tuesday.
With a gurgle and roar 4300 bums more
than the Carnival Legend weighed empty,
that good ship and true was great floating sewer
when the "Squirts of November" came early.


Great.  Now I'll have that stuck in my head all day.  Oh well.  At least it will get that damn thrift shop song out of there...
 
2013-03-15 12:13:00 PM
Another Carnival cruise ship disaster maybe just around the poop deck

There's no verb in this sentence.
 
2013-03-15 12:14:48 PM
It's funny the mechanical problems that make the news when journalists start looking for them (or for a story).  I'm pretty sure your perception of flying wouldn't be as safe as it is if maintenance logs of aircraft were posted as news stories.
 
2013-03-15 12:18:13 PM
You know what? GOOD. Let the wealthy snots who waste money on cruises enjoy the kind of conditions that poor people have to endure when they ride public transportation.
 
2013-03-15 12:25:06 PM
Captain of the ship, reporting for doody.

www.blogcdn.com
 
2013-03-15 12:29:19 PM

ZeroCorpse: You know what? GOOD. Let the wealthy snots who waste money on cruises enjoy the kind of conditions that poor people have to endure when they ride public transportation.


Ah yes, brings back the days when I lived in Chicago had some bum decided it would be fun to decorate the inside of one of the Red line trains with his vomit.  It was certainly an "interesting" smell, I'll give it that!
 
2013-03-15 12:31:58 PM
Their rebranding strategy will be the tagline "Carnival Cruises is people" and will emphasize that it is a social event. Totally not that their ship runs on shiat like it does.
 
2013-03-15 12:32:20 PM

kiwimoogle84: Never been on a cruise, pretty certain if I ever do, it WON'T be Carnival. Princess and Royal Caribbean haven't had 1/10th the problems Carnival has.

If I'm going to pay out the nose to sit on a deck and read overlooking the ocean, I'd better have working plumbing.


Insert gynocologist/proctologist joke here.
 
2013-03-15 12:36:54 PM

finnished: ha-ha-guy:

It's interesting that the thing was built in Finland.  Getting that across the Atlantic can't have been a fun trip for the Captain.

/I assume they bring it across when the weather is good

Lot of them are built in Finland, although I think the other two Carnival ships that were in trouble were built in Italy. So you'd still need to sail across the Atlantic.

Actually, crossing the Danish straits might pose a bigger issue.

[blogs.browardpalmbeach.com image 640x360]


The Legend out of Tampa is the Kvaernar Masa, the other two out of the same Italian yard as the Costa Concordia
 
2013-03-15 12:37:46 PM

Snarfangel: The Legend lives on from the East Coast on down
of the cruise line they call "Glitchy Pooey."
The line, it is said, makes you feel half dead
when the toilets back up every Tuesday.
With a gurgle and roar 4300 bums more
than the Carnival Legend weighed empty,
that good ship and true was great floating sewer
when the "Squirts of November" came early.


That was beautiful.
 
2013-03-15 12:43:21 PM

bdub77: I think I'm pretty much done with cruise ships for a while, especially Carnival. Cruises are totally overrated



Depends which cruise line you sail with. As with hotels, you get what you pay for. The lower-end ones like Carnival and Disney are overrated: bland food, mediocre service, long lines.

Carniva, Disneyl: Red Roof Inn, random Jersey Shore motels
Royal Caribbean, Princess: Courtyard by Marriott, DoubleTree, etc.
Celebrity, Holland America: JW Marriott, Hyatt Regency, etc.
Seven Seas: Ritz-Carlton

We did a 10-day on Celebrity and it was amazing.
 
2013-03-15 12:44:19 PM
Princess Cruise Lines and some of the others with big advertising budgets are applauding Carnival as we speek.

Princess Cruise Lines................................We're not Carnival...................... YAY!
 
2013-03-15 12:49:34 PM
I was on a Carnival Ship that they turned around because some guy had a heart attack.  Then a 16 year old kid fell over a railing (really dude?) and damn near died.  I did get to see one of the Mars rovers get launched over us, so that part was cool.

Cruises are nice for my wife because she gets away from her allergies for a while.  Plus work can't contact me.
 
db2
2013-03-15 12:51:45 PM
Another other troubled ship...

That's some crack editing.
 
2013-03-15 12:52:40 PM

SmackLT: I'm no fan of Carnival, but this is starting to sound less like coincidence and more like deliberate sabotage.


More like cost-cutting to shave a few pennies off expenses to make your balance sheet look good (in the short term).

Blame those short-term-thinking stockholders who reward this sort of behavior.
 
2013-03-15 12:53:56 PM

lelio: Their rebranding strategy will be the tagline "Carnival Cruises is people" and will emphasize that it is a social event. Totally not that their ship runs on shiat like it does.



i105.photobucket.com
 
2013-03-15 12:54:09 PM

SmackLT: I'm no fan of Carnival, but this is starting to sound less like coincidence and more like deliberate sabotage.


It's more likely that since they just had a massive issue recently so now news agencies are watching them closer and reporting to us all the stuff that usually happens but nobody (aside from those actually ON the cruises) gave a crap about before.

So basically, probably the same stuff going on as usual, only now it's newsworthy. Looking at the list of issues for the Legend (which is just one ship in their fleet) I'd say that my explanation is very plausible.
 
2013-03-15 12:56:32 PM

db2: Another other troubled ship...

That's some crack editing.


Nah, it's probably just booze.
 
2013-03-15 12:59:08 PM

EverybodyPanic!: bdub77: I think I'm pretty much done with cruise ships for a while, especially Carnival. Cruises are totally overrated


Depends which cruise line you sail with. As with hotels, you get what you pay for. The lower-end ones like Carnival and Disney are overrated: bland food, mediocre service, long lines.

Carniva, Disneyl: Red Roof Inn, random Jersey Shore motels
Royal Caribbean, Princess: Courtyard by Marriott, DoubleTree, etc.
Celebrity, Holland America: JW Marriott, Hyatt Regency, etc.
Seven Seas: Ritz-Carlton

We did a 10-day on Celebrity and it was amazing.


Another line to add to that list is Viking River Cruises I've done the Danube, the Yangtze, and St. Petersburg to Moscow.  Best trips I have ever taken
 
2013-03-15 12:59:38 PM

ZeroCorpse: You know what? GOOD. Let the wealthy snots who waste money on cruises enjoy the kind of conditions that poor people have to endure when they ride public transportation.


Wealthy snots do not sail on Carnival.
 
2013-03-15 01:00:42 PM

Vitamin Pb: kiwimoogle84: Never been on a cruise, pretty certain if I ever do, it WON'T be Carnival. Princess and Royal Caribbean haven't had 1/10th the problems Carnival has.

If I'm going to pay out the nose to sit on a deck and read overlooking the ocean, I'd better have working plumbing.

Insert gynocologist/proctologist joke here.


Wrong. So very wrong.
 
2013-03-15 01:02:44 PM
Before I went on my first cruise I was worried about being so far from land. But, come to find out, a cruise ship is never more than 2 or 3 miles from land. The more you know!
 
2013-03-15 01:04:18 PM
Went on a Carnival cruise, a couple of years ago. Re-heated Sysco food is sooooooo yummy. Loved the $6
Bud Lights. Did manage to sneak a whole suitcase of bottled water and beer on board, so that made things a little cheaper.
 
2013-03-15 01:09:44 PM
I know of another legend that was complete crap...
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Legend_%28film%29
upload.wikimedia.org
 
2013-03-15 01:21:36 PM
I went on my first cruise a few months back -- best vacation EVER. I live in Orlando, near the Canaveral port, we scored a last minute 3 day cruise, snuck on our own booze and had a blast. The room was cheaper than staying at a Marriott ... and it took me to the Bahamas! And it had a casino! And all you can eat food 24/7!

I'm hoping A) carnival fixes it shiat and B) carnival prices drop drastically. That would be awesome.
 
2013-03-15 01:21:39 PM

Ponzholio: SmackLT: I'm no fan of Carnival, but this is starting to sound less like coincidence and more like deliberate sabotage. constant neglect.


 I was grudgingly convinced to go on a Carnival ship a couple years back, and from talking (i.e drinking heavily) with some of the American and European musicians and other 'visible' employees you learn a lot of what goes on behind the scenes and below waterline with the third-world slaves.

 That company is from all accounts brutal about flouting every international law they can't loophole through, and for quite literal slave labor and sweatshop practices. If they can save a buck, they will, and half the equipment is apparently off-line at any given time.

 The reason that a single backup generator failing can cause havoc is because that may have been the only generator operational to -begin- the cruise. They don't like paying for repairs or refit on-season, or in letting people poke around in there in any country with safety or environmental standards, so they push things off until off-season when it can be done cheap and dirty.

 My advice, stick to reputable cruise lines.
 
2013-03-15 01:27:00 PM

finnished: ha-ha-guy:

It's interesting that the thing was built in Finland.  Getting that across the Atlantic can't have been a fun trip for the Captain.

/I assume they bring it across when the weather is good

Lot of them are built in Finland, although I think the other two Carnival ships that were in trouble were built in Italy. So you'd still need to sail across the Atlantic.

Actually, crossing the Danish straits might pose a bigger issue.

[blogs.browardpalmbeach.com image 640x360]


Ya wanna talk about a tight fit.  NCL's new ship going down river in Germany after leaving the drydock it was built at.

sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net
 
2013-03-15 01:28:09 PM

SmackLT: I'm no fan of Carnival, but this is starting to sound less like coincidence and more like deliberate sabotage.


Otherwise known as a business plan.  See American banking, estate and financial industries.  Ha ha.  Everybody is busting the joint out.
 
2013-03-15 01:30:21 PM

EverybodyPanic!: Carniva, Disneyl: Red Roof Inn, random Jersey Shore motels
Royal Caribbean, Princess: Courtyard by Marriott, DoubleTree, etc.
Celebrity, Holland America: JW Marriott, Hyatt Regency, etc.
Seven Seas: Ritz-Carlton

We did a 10-day on Celebrity and it was amazing


So very THIS.

Never done Celebrity, but I love Holland America. Royal Caribbean is generally a perfectly acceptable alternative, too.
Did get a chance to do one cruise on Seven Seas. Now that was truly amazing, if quiet - service was insanely good, but the average passenger age seemed like it was somewhere between 90 and 150. So, peaceful and relaxing, but hard to get a groove on.
 
2013-03-15 01:36:04 PM

DreamWeaver: I went on my first cruise a few months back -- best vacation EVER. I live in Orlando, near the Canaveral port, we scored a last minute 3 day cruise, snuck on our own booze and had a blast. The room was cheaper than staying at a Marriott ... and it took me to the Bahamas! And it had a casino! And all you can eat food 24/7!

I'm hoping A) carnival fixes it shiat and B) carnival prices drop drastically. That would be awesome.


Yea that kind of situation would make me more likely to be on a cruise, because the last minute ones are so incredibly cheap. But for the price I'd pay to fly to the port and book everything in advance I would rather just fly to my destination and spend more time there.

All you can eat food is kind of a turn off for me.
 
2013-03-15 01:41:44 PM

Snarfangel: The Legend lives on from the East Coast on down
of the cruise line they call "Glitchy Pooey."
The line, it is said, makes you feel half dead
when the toilets back up every Tuesday.
With a gurgle and roar 4300 bums more
than the Carnival Legend weighed empty,
that good ship and true was great floating sewer
when the "Squirts of November" came early.


Goddamnit so much you beat me to filking regarding Cannibal Cruise Lines :D

(Though mine was more Zydeco flavoured:

"Don't mess with my Poop Cruise
Don't mess with my Poop Cruise
You can find another liner
But don't mess with my Poop Cruise...")
 
2013-03-15 01:42:35 PM

NightOwl2255: Before I went on my first cruise I was worried about being so far from land. But, come to find out, a cruise ship is never more than 2 or 3 miles from land. The more you know!


FALSE, if only you really did know more. While this may have been true for your particular experience, to say this is the case for all cruises is ridiculous. Do you know where cruise ships travel? Have you ever taken a Geography class? Inches on a map = miles!
 
2013-03-15 01:46:41 PM

Pow Wow: NightOwl2255: Before I went on my first cruise I was worried about being so far from land. But, come to find out, a cruise ship is never more than 2 or 3 miles from land. The more you know!

FALSE, if only you really did know more. While this may have been true for your particular experience, to say this is the case for all cruises is ridiculous. Do you know where cruise ships travel? Have you ever taken a Geography class? Inches on a map = miles!


Straight down. Didn't say dry land.
 
2013-03-15 01:52:42 PM

ZeroCorpse: You know what? GOOD. Let the wealthy snots who waste money on cruises enjoy the kind of conditions that poor people have to endure when they ride public transportation.


You honestly think wealthy people ride Carnival?
 
2013-03-15 01:55:41 PM

DSF6969: finnished: ha-ha-guy:

It's interesting that the thing was built in Finland.  Getting that across the Atlantic can't have been a fun trip for the Captain.

/I assume they bring it across when the weather is good

Lot of them are built in Finland, although I think the other two Carnival ships that were in trouble were built in Italy. So you'd still need to sail across the Atlantic.

Actually, crossing the Danish straits might pose a bigger issue.

[blogs.browardpalmbeach.com image 640x360]

Ya wanna talk about a tight fit.  NCL's new ship going down river in Germany after leaving the drydock it was built at.

[sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net image 850x567]


Question: Do you work for NCL? Good line back in the 80's, haven't been with them for a while.

Sailed three times on the SS Norway (formally the France).

/real sad to see her scrapped
 
2013-03-15 02:02:56 PM

lilbordr: I know of another legend that was complete crap...
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Legend_%28film%29
[upload.wikimedia.org image 281x437]


you shut your whore mouth!
 
2013-03-15 02:03:07 PM
It's amazing anyone on a Carnival ship (including the Captain) is ever sober enough to do any maintenance... During the handful of company cruises I've been on, I've never seen so much booze and never smelled so much vomit.

Currently, my wife and I only do Royal Carribean or Celebrity cruises.

One of the more strange things is that the picture of the ship stuck in St. Maartin shows freedom of the seas (RC) birthed right next to it... and I was on that ship 2 weeks ago in that port.

I will never ever ever do a Carnival Cruise again.
 
2013-03-15 02:03:30 PM
I went on a cruise to Bermuda when I was like 16 (1985).  It was actually quite awesome.  And this is why...
There is no drinking age once you're in international waters.  On top of this, my brother and I were in a cabin on our own.  No cerfew, as it were.  So we spent every night in the bar with all of the other underaged people on the ship.

It was awesome.  And not once were we stranded, covered in poop, or otherwise given inconvenience.

It was not a Carnival ship.
 
2013-03-15 02:05:07 PM

MyKingdomForYourHorse: Mateorocks: FloydA: [i105.photobucket.com image 600x314]
What a Legend with pacing problems and a horrible ending might look like.

Man, everything went to sh*t in that movie when that dog died.

The alternate ending at least redeems the movie a little...only a little though


The original ending actualy. It was supposed to be the point of the whole movie, that they weren't mindless killing zombies. Some studio exec didn't like a movie that shoot Will Smith was actualy kinda the bad guy in this.
 
2013-03-15 02:09:30 PM

2chris2: Another Carnival cruise ship disaster maybe just around the poop deck

There's no verb in this sentence.


"poop" is a verb.
/just sayin...
//i gotta run, er, trot.
 
2013-03-15 02:29:18 PM

vpb: Looking at the Wikipedia entry, this is normal for the Legend.


I took a cruise on the Carnival Legend two years ago. Seems I was lucky nothing happened...
 
2013-03-15 02:37:33 PM

lilbordr: I know of another legend that was complete crap...
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Legend_%28film%29
[upload.wikimedia.org image 281x437]


No thumbs down, fark you, dislike button on here
 
2013-03-15 02:51:16 PM

ZeroCorpse: You know what? GOOD. Let the wealthy snots who waste money on cruises enjoy the kind of conditions that poor people have to endure when they ride public transportation.


Uh, you do realize they give those 3-day cruises away like popcorn to the inner-city minorities as payment for sales sessions.  Pro-tip: don't go on a 3 or a 5 day cruise ... ever ... it's like $350/person at normal rates and you can just imagine the kind of people that go ...

I prefer the clipper ships that can get into the smaller ports ... much more expensive, but you don't have to wade through a blog post of "People of Walmart" on the ship ...

thecruisepeople.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-03-15 02:58:54 PM

Snarfangel: The Legend lives on from the East Coast on down
of the cruise line they call "Glitchy Pooey."
The line, it is said, makes you feel half dead
when the toilets back up every Tuesday.
With a gurgle and roar 4300 bums more
than the Carnival Legend weighed empty,
that good ship and true was great floating sewer
when the "Squirts of November" came early.


Superb. I knight thee.
 
2013-03-15 03:05:54 PM
Oh, and:

Cold raw sewage is in my shoes
There's no point in flushing and the toilets ooze
So be my guest, the deck's covered with poos
Won't you let me take you on a Poop Cruise.

/Oo-ee
//Oo-ee baby.
 
2013-03-15 03:23:52 PM

CliChe Guevara: EverybodyPanic!: Carniva, Disneyl: Red Roof Inn, random Jersey Shore motels
Royal Caribbean, Princess: Courtyard by Marriott, DoubleTree, etc.
Celebrity, Holland America: JW Marriott, Hyatt Regency, etc.
Seven Seas: Ritz-Carlton

We did a 10-day on Celebrity and it was amazing

So very THIS.

Never done Celebrity, but I love Holland America. Royal Caribbean is generally a perfectly acceptable alternative, too.
Did get a chance to do one cruise on Seven Seas. Now that was truly amazing, if quiet - service was insanely good, but the average passenger age seemed like it was somewhere between 90 and 150. So, peaceful and relaxing, but hard to get a groove on.


Been on two Regent Seven Seas cruises.  One in French Polynesia and the other the Caribbean.  The reason for all the old folks is because they are all inclusive and quite expensive for that reason.  Free alcohol in your room if you'd like also.  No, I didn't pay.  Father-in-law is a neurologist....
 
2013-03-15 03:25:09 PM

bikerbob59: CliChe Guevara: EverybodyPanic!: Carniva, Disneyl: Red Roof Inn, random Jersey Shore motels
Royal Caribbean, Princess: Courtyard by Marriott, DoubleTree, etc.
Celebrity, Holland America: JW Marriott, Hyatt Regency, etc.
Seven Seas: Ritz-Carlton

We did a 10-day on Celebrity and it was amazing

So very THIS.

Never done Celebrity, but I love Holland America. Royal Caribbean is generally a perfectly acceptable alternative, too.
Did get a chance to do one cruise on Seven Seas. Now that was truly amazing, if quiet - service was insanely good, but the average passenger age seemed like it was somewhere between 90 and 150. So, peaceful and relaxing, but hard to get a groove on.

Been on two Regent Seven Seas cruises.  One in French Polynesia and the other the Caribbean.  The reason for all the old folks is because they are all inclusive and quite expensive for that reason.  Free alcohol in your room if you'd like also.  No, I didn't pay.  Father-in-law is a neurologist....


I meant to say that older people can afford the cost while the younger people can't.
 
2013-03-15 03:33:10 PM
zerocorpse:  I agree that rich snobs don't cruise with Carnival.  This rich snob cruises on Crystal Cruise, the very best. But wait , you hate us rich snobs----who cares BWAHAHAHAH
 
2013-03-15 03:37:39 PM
resource.mmgn.com
 
2013-03-15 04:23:50 PM

Lord Snoopy's G.P.E.H.: Oh, and:

Cold raw sewage is in my shoes
There's no point in flushing and the toilets ooze
So be my guest, the deck's covered with poos
Won't you let me take you on a Poop Cruise.

/Oo-ee
//Oo-ee baby.


Feel like dumpin', baby won't you join me please

We'll leave a crap slick all along the Florida Keys


My cabin's like a litterbox for fifty cats

The show tonight will feature "The Aristocrats"

So be my gue-HEY! THAT'S NOT APPLE JUICE!

Won't you let me take you on a Poop Cruise.
 
2013-03-15 04:25:12 PM
Oh Ship!
 
2013-03-15 04:40:35 PM
For all you cruise types, is Disney the best bet for one with young kids? That was my assumption, but I don't really know anything about them.
 
2013-03-15 04:47:43 PM
Just want to throw out this fun fact: All of you guys complimenting Holland America do realized it's owned by Carnival Corporation, right?

HAL, Princess, Seabourn, Costa, AIDA, Ibero, and Carnival Cruise Lines - all owned by Carnival Corporation.  All have the same shareholders.  So those cutbacks you see in Carnival Cruise Lines?  They're also likely happening in the other ships owned by Carnival Corp.

Sweet sailing to all!
 
2013-03-15 04:48:11 PM

Happy Hours: Was the accelerator pedal stuck?

Did they try shifting into neutral? Or pulling the key out of the ignition?


The captain let his wife drive, and she let her foot rest on the clutch pedal. That gawdawful smell isn't the sewer, just a smoked cruise ship-sized clutch.
 
2013-03-15 06:01:21 PM

ha-ha-guy: vpb: Looking at the Wikipedia entry, this is normal for the Legend.

It's interesting that the thing was built in Finland.  Getting that across the Atlantic can't have been a fun trip for the Captain.

/I assume they bring it across when the weather is good


I did some consulting work for Royal Caribbean (great place to work, BTW).  They build one ship a year, to bring it across they treat it as a shakedown cruise.  Full crew, right down to the spas. The IT geeks are on board to set up all of the systems, as well as people setting up stuff like PPV, casino, POS, etc. I'm told it can be a little hairy if the seas are rough, but otherwise it's a huge amount of fun.  Everyone works really long days, and then kicks back with huge meals and relaxes and has a good time.

They do an Atlantic cruise annually, during the summer when things are slow in Florida they send some of the ships to Europe. Pretty good price for a two week cruise that stops in Spain, France, and Italy, then you catch a flight back.  I've thought about doing it - you're basically in a luxury hotel/resort, plenty of stuff to do, and it's under a hundred bucks a day for lodging and food, a great deal.
 
2013-03-15 06:12:06 PM
Again, I must ask, how are any of these cruise companies still in business?
 
2013-03-15 06:22:24 PM

lafong: zerocorpse:  I agree that rich snobs don't cruise with Carnival.  This rich snob cruises on Crystal Cruise, the very best. But wait , you hate us rich snobs----who cares BWAHAHAHAH


I don't hate anybody. I'm pretty sure I'm happier than anyone, rich or poor. If you need to talk about your money to validate your own emotional state, that's your hang-up.

If you think floating around in a cheap hotel makes you better than other people, that's cool. Enjoy it. I'm sure it fills some hole in your life, somehow.
 
2013-03-15 06:27:51 PM
Maybe, and I'm just spitballing here, it's not a good idea to make a gigantic ship that holds 5,000 people. Maybe 5,000 people is more capacity than a ship's generators are able to handle.

I know cruise lines have a problem making money on cruises and feel they have to try and make money on volume, but I think it's beginning to turn people off on the idea of cruises. Or at least cruises on mega ships.

Even without the loss of electricity and ensuing filth, it doesn't sound fun to me. It sounds like being trapped in a mall in the middle of the ocean for a week. With old and/or fat people. And I don't mind old or fat people generally, but a week at sea with them ... no. Hell no.
 
2013-03-15 07:29:56 PM

bdub77: St. Maarten


Heh... I've been to that airport and on the beach at the airport. Fun drunken times, fun drunken times. There are probably YouTube videos of it. I didn't really like landing there but I'm not all that fond of flying to begin with.
 
2013-03-15 08:12:33 PM

Nick Nostril: Again, I must ask, how are any of these cruise companies still in business?


Well, you see, people give them money and they give them cruises in exchange. They use that money to pay for the ship, personnel, etc... They charge enough money to cover those expenses and have extra money left over - that's called profit.

S'not so tough to figure out. It is pretty much like any successful business.
 
2013-03-15 10:01:03 PM
DSF6969:

Ya wanna talk about a tight fit.  NCL's new ship going down river in Germany after leaving the drydock it was built at.

[sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net image 850x567]


One way I know that I am a bad person: that picture makes me want to be behind the stick of a Douglas Dauntless with a 1,000-lb bomb ready to go.....
 
2013-03-15 10:22:26 PM

EverybodyPanic!: bdub77: I think I'm pretty much done with cruise ships for a while, especially Carnival. Cruises are totally overrated


Depends which cruise line you sail with. As with hotels, you get what you pay for. The lower-end ones like Carnival and Disney are overrated: bland food, mediocre service, long lines.

Carniva, Disneyl: Red Roof Inn, random Jersey Shore motels
Royal Caribbean, Princess: Courtyard by Marriott, DoubleTree, etc.
Celebrity, Holland America: JW Marriott, Hyatt Regency, etc.
Seven Seas: Ritz-Carlton

We did a 10-day on Celebrity and it was amazing.


No, it really depends on the ship. I've been on Royal Caribbean's Allure of the Seas and it was pretty spectacular. My only complaint were the over-priced drinks, and the rule against bringing your own wine onboard. Came prepared with Rum Runner Flasks, so it was all good.

I've also been on the Ruby Princess for a two week cruise of the Mediterranean, and it was the best money I ever spent.

But you couldn't be more wrong about Disney cruise lines. The older ships in the fleet? Maybe. The newer ones are awesome. The downside to Disney is that they are expensive.
 
2013-03-16 01:27:16 AM
I'm impatient. I want full on, lost-our-GPS tracking, adrift for weeks, eatin' the weak ones drama, some real Lord of the Flies atrocities. None of this Oh we got no air conditioning or refrigeration and had to eat iffy tinned stew crap. Cannibalism! Rape! Offenders crucified on the climbing wall by hooting mobs dispensing cruise ship justice! Disembarking passengers with thousand-yard stares who've drunk their own piss! Nothing less than the complete surrender of any pretense of civilization. Otherwise don't waste my farking time. I want to be entertained, god dammit.
 
2013-03-16 02:05:03 AM
Who would pay to sail on a ship registered in some third world country with a marginally effect government?
 
2013-03-16 03:47:17 AM
As someone who got off a Norwegian Cruise about 30minutes ago, and is heading into Rome I'm getting a kick . . .

\that's cruise #24 for me
\\excited to do a thirty five day, double trans-atlantic in July
 
2013-03-16 09:38:44 AM
Is the standard operating procedure for Carnival to flood theirs ships with sewage whenever there is a generator malfunction?
 
2013-03-16 01:05:12 PM
Corn-ival Cruise Lines, more like.
 
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