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(New York Magazine)   Facts about Pope Francis: #26 Everyone calls him Psycho. #27 He don't like anyone touching his stuff. #28 If any of you homos touch him, he'll kill you. (Note: #28 is real)   (nymag.com) divider line 228
    More: Interesting, Pope Francis, Italian immigrants, gay adoption, free market capitalism, military dictatorship, Jesuits  
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22869 clicks; posted to Main » on 14 Mar 2013 at 10:13 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-03-14 01:31:11 AM
Shouldn't you find a link referencing #28 then?

Fail.

-1
 
2013-03-14 03:18:52 AM
FTFA:

4. He has taken the name Pope Francis. Not Francis I yet. "It will become Francis I after we have a Francis II," the Vatican said.) It's the first time a new pope has taken a name that hasn't already been used by a former pope since Pope Lando in 913.


I think we just found out which Pope had the coolest name.
 
2013-03-14 06:57:24 AM
francis asissy
 
2013-03-14 08:38:16 AM
Yeah, I think its safe to say that we've moved toward embracing Pope "Lighten Up, Francis" and Pope Breakin' 2: "Electric Bergoglio."
 
2013-03-14 08:43:17 AM
#29 Chicks dig him because he rarely wears underwear, and when he does it's usually something unusual.
 
2013-03-14 08:46:10 AM
Had a lung removed as a child?  That's pretty odd in itself.  That's usually associated with an older person either in the coal mining industry, asbestos or heavy smoker.  Must have been one doozy of an infection if it prompted them to remove a lung from a child.
 
2013-03-14 08:57:21 AM
Yes, Pope face, I'm sure God cares more about stopping consensual loving relationships then He does about institutionalized child rape.
 
2013-03-14 08:58:41 AM

nekom: Had a lung removed as a child?  That's pretty odd in itself.  That's usually associated with an older person either in the coal mining industry, asbestos or heavy smoker.  Must have been one doozy of an infection if it prompted them to remove a lung from a child.


He also used to tango a lot?  How do you tango with one lung?  You'd think intense physical activity would be pretty low on the list of things you can do.  But what do I know?
 
2013-03-14 09:00:27 AM

Rev. Skarekroe: nekom: Had a lung removed as a child?  That's pretty odd in itself.  That's usually associated with an older person either in the coal mining industry, asbestos or heavy smoker.  Must have been one doozy of an infection if it prompted them to remove a lung from a child.

He also used to tango a lot?  How do you tango with one lung?  You'd think intense physical activity would be pretty low on the list of things you can do.  But what do I know?


Well, that's miracle #1 then, right? So he only needs one more to become a saint. Or do they have to be posthumous miracles? My wife is vaguely Catholic but I admit I know little to nothing about it.
 
2013-03-14 09:05:01 AM


10. He called Argentina's legalization of gay marriage in 2010 a "destructive attack on God's plan."

11. He argued that gay adoption would "discriminate against children."


Hateful old sh*tbag.
 
2013-03-14 09:17:52 AM
Takes public transportation and lives in a modest home

what public transportation:
t2.gstatic.com
and a modest home
www.theglobalistreport.com
might look like
 
2013-03-14 09:28:09 AM

The_Sponge: FTFA:

4. He has taken the name Pope Francis. Not Francis I yet. "It will become Francis I after we have a Francis II," the Vatican said.) It's the first time a new pope has taken a name that hasn't already been used by a former pope since Pope Lando in 913.


I think we just found out which Pope had the coolest name.


What about friggin' John Paul? Granted, both names had been used individually before, but not in combination.
 
2013-03-14 09:36:47 AM

serial_crusher: Takes public transportation and lives in a modest home

what public transportation:
[t2.gstatic.com image 276x183]
and a modest home
[www.theglobalistreport.com image 781x550]
might look like


Those are perks of the job. Unless he orders all the walls to be trimmed in gold, I'm not gonna fault him for moving into the Catholic's version of the White House.

But I doubt that much will change with this pope and every other pope before him.
 
2013-03-14 09:40:09 AM
Demanded that an art exhibit that "depicted images of Catholic saints, Jesus Christ and the Virgin Mary in a blender, an electric toaster and a frying pan, among other unconventional settings" be shut down, calling it "blasphemous."

So it's blasphemous when someone makes an art exhibit about it, but every time you see Jesus in a tortilla it's a miracle?
 
2013-03-14 09:44:55 AM

The_Sponge: FTFA:

4. He has taken the name Pope Francis. Not Francis I yet. "It will become Francis I after we have a Francis II," the Vatican said.) It's the first time a new pope has taken a name that hasn't already been used by a former pope since Pope Lando in 913.


I think we just found out which Pope had the coolest name.


a4.ec-images.myspacecdn.com
 
2013-03-14 10:04:28 AM
Pope Lando

When I die and (hopefully) go to Heaven, I want Pope Lando to say to me:


"You look absolutely beautiful. You truly belong here with us among the clouds"
 
2013-03-14 10:16:44 AM
17. Refuses to grant interviews.

A Jesuit who refuses to talk? He must be the Anti-Christ!!1!
 
2013-03-14 10:17:51 AM

The_Sponge: FTFA:

4. He has taken the name Pope Francis. Not Francis I yet. "It will become Francis I after we have a Francis II," the Vatican said.) It's the first time a new pope has taken a name that hasn't already been used by a former pope since Pope Lando in 913.


I think we just found out which Pope had the coolest name.


I think they mean Pope John Paul in 1978
 
2013-03-14 10:18:40 AM
I'm not sure why there is all this surprise/discussion about how he doesn't support gay marraige. Did people actually think the pope of the freakin Catholic church actually would? Really?
 
2013-03-14 10:20:41 AM
img.geocaching.com
 
Xai
2013-03-14 10:21:33 AM
Pope lando calrisian
 
2013-03-14 10:22:33 AM
He's a very humble man, from what I've been hearing.

Like, from every single news outlet throughout most of the afternoon and evening yesterday, every two minutes or so, over and over and over and over and over. . . .

There were also a lot of priests and Catholic Church scholars on TV remarking on how humble he is.

Chris Matthews said on his show last night that he has high hopes for this pope, because the guy's really humble.

Apparently, the new pope is a very humble man.
 
2013-03-14 10:22:44 AM
Is Pope touching a sport in the gay community?
 
2013-03-14 10:22:44 AM

show me: The_Sponge: FTFA:

4. He has taken the name Pope Francis. Not Francis I yet. "It will become Francis I after we have a Francis II," the Vatican said.) It's the first time a new pope has taken a name that hasn't already been used by a former pope since Pope Lando in 913.


I think we just found out which Pope had the coolest name.

What about friggin' John Paul? Granted, both names had been used individually before, but not in combination.


nah if he'd gone all the way and added George Ringo we'd be talking
 
2013-03-14 10:22:56 AM
It's the first time a new pope has taken a name that hasn't already been used by a former pope since Pope Lando in 913.

Only a few popes took regnal names before the 11th century, and Lando wasn't one of them. Nor was anyone else without a roman numeral or now known as "the first." Lando was simply his own name.

So Francis is the first pope ever to take a name that wasn't used before (or second, if you count John Paul I). He is the first since Lando not to have a roman numeral (John Paul I did call himself John Paul the First).

He's also the first pope from outside of Europe since the 8th century.
 
2013-03-14 10:23:10 AM
Hmmmm... Pope's still a dick, but not as big a dick as the last one it seems.
 
2013-03-14 10:23:21 AM

Prank Monkey: I'm not sure why there is all this surprise/discussion about how he doesn't support gay marraige. Did people actually think the pope of the freakin Catholic church actually would? Really?


Could be worse.  He could be an ex-Nazi.
 
2013-03-14 10:23:27 AM
He used to tango? With only one lung? Everybody knows it takes two to tango. He must be special.
 
2013-03-14 10:23:40 AM

show me: What about friggin' John Paul? Granted, both names had been used individually before, but not in combination.


He was a huge Beatles fan. No one is denying that.
 
2013-03-14 10:24:18 AM
6. He's the son of Italian immigrants.

This is why he was elected. An Italian who is also Argentine. Argentina is the most European of the SA countries. Italians are the largest ethnic group, especially in Buenos Aires. In addition, SA is about the only continent in which the RCC is not in decline. If the Church really wanted to nod to SA, it would have elected a Mestizo pope, since Mestizos make up the majority or Latin Americans.
 
2013-03-14 10:24:20 AM

Prank Monkey: I'm not sure why there is all this surprise/discussion about how he doesn't support gay marraige. Did people actually think the pope of the freakin Catholic church actually would? Really?


I worked for the Jesuits for 15 years. It's the Gay wing of the Catholic church and they all about education and science.
 
2013-03-14 10:24:21 AM
A 76 year old with one lung, I guess we'll be seeing white smoke in the not too distant future.
 
2013-03-14 10:24:35 AM

The_Sponge: FTFA:

4. He has taken the name Pope Francis. Not Francis I yet. "It will become Francis I after we have a Francis II," the Vatican said.) It's the first time a new pope has taken a name that hasn't already been used by a former pope since Pope Lando in 913.


I think we just found out which Pope had the coolest name.


Nope.

i171.photobucket.com
 
2013-03-14 10:25:03 AM

bdub77: The_Sponge: FTFA:

4. He has taken the name Pope Francis. Not Francis I yet. "It will become Francis I after we have a Francis II," the Vatican said.) It's the first time a new pope has taken a name that hasn't already been used by a former pope since Pope Lando in 913.


I think we just found out which Pope had the coolest name.

[a4.ec-images.myspacecdn.com image 170x170]


interesting facts about pope lando:
-he was only pope for 6 months before dying
-lando was his real name and he apparently decided it was too badass to change upon ascension to the papacy
- he was one of the popes to rule during the period of the papacy known as the "pornocracy"
 
2013-03-14 10:25:26 AM

vernonFL: Pope Lando

When I die and (hopefully) go to Heaven, I want Pope Lando to say to me:


"You look absolutely beautiful. You truly belong here with us among the clouds"


win
 
2013-03-14 10:25:30 AM

Prank Monkey: I'm not sure why there is all this surprise/discussion about how he doesn't support gay marraige. Did people actually think the pope of the freakin Catholic church actually would? Really?


I think it's more the continued calling out of the church for their backwards thinking than it is surprise.
 
2013-03-14 10:26:39 AM
one lung and 76. Nice.

And God said unto the Pope "I would rather my children be sad and lonely in the care of orphanage then in a loving home with two dads or moms. And so it was."


I'm am so over religion.
 
2013-03-14 10:26:39 AM

stuhayes2010: A 76 year old with one lung, I guess we'll be seeing white smoke in the not too distant future.


This.  I'm trying to figure out the logic here.  Last pope steps down because he got too old for the job...at age 85.  So, they go with a younger one who is healthy, right?
 
2013-03-14 10:26:44 AM

taco flavored keeses: He used to tango? With only one lung? Everybody knows it takes two to tango. He must be special.


That joke is so frigging awful.  I mean that is probably the most horrid attempt at humor I've ever seen here.
Reported.
 
2013-03-14 10:27:13 AM

serial_crusher: Takes public transportation and lives in a modest home

what public transportation:
[t2.gstatic.com image 276x183]
and a modest home
[www.theglobalistreport.com image 781x550]
might look like


Well, the original was worded incorrectly.  As Archbishop of Buenos Aires, he took public transit and lived in a one bedroom apartment.
 
2013-03-14 10:27:45 AM

vernonFL: Pope Lando

When I die and (hopefully) go to Heaven, I want Pope Lando to say to me:


"You look absolutely beautiful. You truly belong here with us among the clouds"


You will reply, "You old smoothie"
 
2013-03-14 10:27:48 AM
I now know everything I need to know.
img57.imageshack.us
 
2013-03-14 10:27:51 AM

Phoenix_M: Prank Monkey: I'm not sure why there is all this surprise/discussion about how he doesn't support gay marraige. Did people actually think the pope of the freakin Catholic church actually would? Really?

I worked for the Jesuits for 15 years. It's the Gay wing of the Catholic church and they all about education and science.


I am going to admit my ignorance about the Catholic church but wouldn't that mean that this is a positive thing? Nothing changes overnight but could that mean that this pope could start things moving in a positive, more modern direction?
 
2013-03-14 10:28:19 AM
Nevermind all the unimportant stuff. Does the Pope smoke dope ?
 
2013-03-14 10:28:36 AM

stuhayes2010: A 76 year old with one lung, I guess we'll be seeing white smoke in the not too distant future.


He's had one lung for 50 years.
 
2013-03-14 10:28:51 AM

stuhayes2010: A 76 year old with one lung, I guess we'll be seeing white smoke in the not too distant future.


Although interestingly the other lung was removed when he was a kid, and it makes me wonder if his body was able to increase the efficiency and/or size of the existing lung as he grew into an adult.  I think if he had his lung removed a couple of years ago, he'd probably already be dead.
 
2013-03-14 10:29:10 AM
What a Pope tango might look like

www.marblesthebrainstore.com
 
2013-03-14 10:29:30 AM

The_Sponge: FTFA:

4. He has taken the name Pope Francis. Not Francis I yet. "It will become Francis I after we have a Francis II," the Vatican said.) It's the first time a new pope has taken a name that hasn't already been used by a former pope since Pope Lando in 913.


I think we just found out which Pope had the coolest name.


I could have sworn the Vatican called John Paul I despite the fact he was first of his name.  Of course he only made it 33 days in 1978.
 
2013-03-14 10:29:35 AM
"accusing fellow church officials of hypocrisy for forgetting that Jesus Christ bathed lepers and ate with prostitutes."

damn, and all this time i thought he bathed with prostitutes and ate lepers...
 
2013-03-14 10:30:00 AM

nekom: Rev. Skarekroe: nekom: Had a lung removed as a child?  That's pretty odd in itself.  That's usually associated with an older person either in the coal mining industry, asbestos or heavy smoker.  Must have been one doozy of an infection if it prompted them to remove a lung from a child.

He also used to tango a lot?  How do you tango with one lung?  You'd think intense physical activity would be pretty low on the list of things you can do.  But what do I know?

Well, that's miracle #1 then, right? So he only needs one more to become a saint. Or do they have to be posthumous miracles? My wife is vaguely Catholic but I admit I know little to nothing about it.


Aren't they all?
 
2013-03-14 10:30:37 AM

borg: I think they mean Pope John Paul in 1978


Both "John" and "Paul" had been used by previous Pope's before, just not in combination.  Francis has never been used, just like Lando before him.
 
m00
2013-03-14 10:30:40 AM
images3.wikia.nocookie.net
 
2013-03-14 10:30:42 AM
I'm not surprised that the new pope is a homophobe. What I've noticed, though, is how many articles are praising this guy as an advocate for the poor and, as number 14 in this article mentions, that he lived modestly and took public transportation while ignoring the fact that he had his own vacation home while he was in Agentina. How many people boast about being sincere advocates for the poor because the "live modestly" and yet at the same time have vacation homes?

Also note number 17, that he refuses to do interviews. Dick Cheney and Sarah Palin will LOVE this guy.
 
2013-03-14 10:30:47 AM

Mercutio74: stuhayes2010: A 76 year old with one lung, I guess we'll be seeing white smoke in the not too distant future.

Although interestingly the other lung was removed when he was a kid, and it makes me wonder if his body was able to increase the efficiency and/or size of the existing lung as he grew into an adult.  I think if he had his lung removed a couple of years ago, he'd probably already be dead.


There is more room for Jesus
 
2013-03-14 10:30:48 AM

borg: stuhayes2010: A 76 year old with one lung, I guess we'll be seeing white smoke in the not too distant future.

He's had one lung for 50 years.


He's 76, so he's had one lung for 76 years.
 
2013-03-14 10:31:00 AM
"21. Is a critic of the International Monetary Fund and free-market capitalism for contributing to poverty."

One out of twenty-five aint bad. Right?
 
2013-03-14 10:31:15 AM
Does it ever matter who they elect?
 
2013-03-14 10:31:17 AM

scottydoesntknow: Demanded that an art exhibit that "depicted images of Catholic saints, Jesus Christ and the Virgin Mary in a blender, an electric toaster and a frying pan, among other unconventional settings" be shut down, calling it "blasphemous."

So it's blasphemous when someone makes an art exhibit about it, but every time you see Jesus in a tortilla it's a miracle?



Mmmm, sacrilicious.
 
2013-03-14 10:31:57 AM

tuna fingers: taco flavored keeses: He used to tango? With only one lung? Everybody knows it takes two to tango. He must be special.

That joke is so frigging awful.  I mean that is probably the most horrid attempt at humor I've ever seen here.
Reported.


blog.lib.umn.edu

"What he said!"


/worst joke of my youth..."Yesterday was my birthday." "Oh, Happy Birthday! What did you get?" "My daddy's iron lung?" "Really? What did he have to say about it?" "Yuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhh..."
 
2013-03-14 10:32:26 AM
#29 He flogs the bishop.
 
2013-03-14 10:32:33 AM
was so hoping cardinal socola was named pope.

i'll bet all the jebbies are pounding each other on the back today.
 
2013-03-14 10:33:20 AM

I_C_Weener: Could be worse. He could be an ex-Nazi.


And suddenly the reason they picked an Argentinian becomes clear.
 
2013-03-14 10:33:31 AM

Phoenix_M: Prank Monkey: I'm not sure why there is all this surprise/discussion about how he doesn't support gay marraige. Did people actually think the pope of the freakin Catholic church actually would? Really?

I worked for the Jesuits for 15 years. It's the Gay wing of the Catholic church and they all about education and science.


Yep. In fact the new Pope has a degree in Chemistry. While he is on the Right side of the Jesuit movement, he is to the left of the existing power structure. I am actually quite surprised he was elected. He must know where a lot of sodomized alter boys are buried.
 
2013-03-14 10:33:44 AM
Little known fact. He is NOT named after Francis of Assisi.

shop.tcm.com
 
2013-03-14 10:34:12 AM

vernonFL: Pope Lando

When I die and (hopefully) go to Heaven, I want Pope Lando to say to me:


"You look absolutely beautiful. You truly belong here with us among the clouds"


Thanks for the spit-take!  That was awesome.
 
2013-03-14 10:34:29 AM

Barbecue Bob: [img.geocaching.com image 180x180]


Came for 'lighten up'.
Leaving happy.
 
2013-03-14 10:34:39 AM
12. Gave a speech in 2012 "accusing fellow church officials of hypocrisy for forgetting that Jesus Christ bathed lepers and ate with prostitutes."

Christianity would be a kickass religion if that was 'ate lepers and bathed with prostitutes'.
 
2013-03-14 10:35:15 AM

mikaloyd: Nevermind all the unimportant stuff. Does the Pope smoke dope ?


That's what did in his one lung.
/does he poop in the woods?
 
2013-03-14 10:36:08 AM

Jaws75: I'm not surprised that the new pope is a homophobe. What I've noticed, though, is how many articles are praising this guy as an advocate for the poor and, as number 14 in this article mentions, that he lived modestly and took public transportation while ignoring the fact that he had his own vacation home while he was in Agentina. How many people boast about being sincere advocates for the poor because the "live modestly" and yet at the same time have vacation homes?


Well, they've got to say something positive about a new pope.  You can't simply say, "Yeah, this picked this guy because he played the political game the best". They had an even harder time with the last dude, as I recall they best thing they could say about him was that he had a conservative viewpoint on Catholicism and then they'd make up something beneficial that a conservative pope might do for the sect.  Of course, they didn't realize at the time that he was instrumental in protecting child diddlers which is probably a contributing factor to him emeritiring.

/Yup, I made up the word "emeritiring"
 
2013-03-14 10:37:27 AM
I read he likes to suck the filling out of the jelly donuts, puts them back and then sits back and waits for someone to grab one.   And then he laughs........and laughs
 
2013-03-14 10:38:12 AM
25. Used to http://www.ansa.it/web/notizie/rubriche/english/2013/03/13/Pope-liked- tango_8394775.html">tango with his girlfriend before he "discovered [his] religious vocation."

That's the forbidden dance!
 
2013-03-14 10:38:16 AM

I_C_Weener: stuhayes2010: A 76 year old with one lung, I guess we'll be seeing white smoke in the not too distant future.

This.  I'm trying to figure out the logic here.  Last pope steps down because he got too old for the job...at age 85.  So, they go with a younger one who is healthy, right?


He's warm and friendly, so he's a good PR man unlike the recently departed one.  The big question is if he can replace the Curia or not.  He personally does not come from a church with a large bureaucracy, so he can't just send everyone in Rome to some monastery and bring in his guys to replace them (whereas supposedly the Italian candidate had a massive power base and could have easily brought in his guys quickly).  However Francis is a Jesuit so he could clean house and bring Jesuits in en masse.  The question seems to be which one he's do, which in turns shows if entrenched scumbags won or not.
 
2013-03-14 10:38:47 AM

nekom: Had a lung removed as a child?  That's pretty odd in itself.  That's usually associated with an older person either in the coal mining industry, asbestos or heavy smoker.  Must have been one doozy of an infection if it prompted them to remove a lung from a child.


They had to make room for the upgrade to his Cultural Advancement Denial subsystems.
 
2013-03-14 10:38:52 AM

karnal: I read he likes to suck the filling out of the jelly donuts, puts them back and then sits back and waits for someone to grab one.   And then he laughs........and laughs


...and then turns it into a parable about expecting a reward for doing nothing.

/now THAT'S poping.
 
2013-03-14 10:39:30 AM

TheShavingofOccam123: tuna fingers: taco flavored keeses: He used to tango? With only one lung? Everybody knows it takes two to tango. He must be special.

That joke is so frigging awful.  I mean that is probably the most horrid attempt at humor I've ever seen here.
Reported.

[blog.lib.umn.edu image 432x363]

"What he said!"

/worst joke of my youth..."Yesterday was my birthday." "Oh, Happy Birthday! What did you get?" "My daddy's iron lung?" "Really? What did he have to say about it?" "Yuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhh..."


Looks like the kid on the bottom right is getting a little 'upskirt'...giggity
 
2013-03-14 10:40:08 AM
I want to learn more about Pope Lando.
 
2013-03-14 10:40:21 AM
I'm still waiting for Pope Lance I, who with the help of his consort, Steve, will fabulously redecorate the Vatican to include dreamy pastels, ficus trees and tract lighting.
 
2013-03-14 10:40:28 AM

nekom: Had a lung removed as a child?  That's pretty odd in itself.  That's usually associated with an older person either in the coal mining industry, asbestos or heavy smoker.  Must have been one doozy of an infection if it prompted them to remove a lung from a child.


He's 76; medicine's changed quite a bit in the last 70 years.  I know that they used to do pneumonectomies (and phrenic nerve transections, and other messed up stuff) for tuberculosis infections, so maybe he had the consumption at some point.
 
2013-03-14 10:40:42 AM

BalugaJoe: I want to learn more about Pope Lando.


I think he lost the Popemobile in a card game.
 
2013-03-14 10:42:38 AM

Mercutio74: karnal: I read he likes to suck the filling out of the jelly donuts, puts them back and then sits back and waits for someone to grab one.   And then he laughs........and laughs

...and then turns it into a parable about expecting a reward for doing nothing.

/now THAT'S pooping.



And a jelly poop at that
 
2013-03-14 10:44:05 AM
His full Pope name was Lando Cahristening
 
2013-03-14 10:44:59 AM
"visited a hospice to kiss and wash the feet of 12 AIDS patients"

I guess this is an impressive act when your ignorant minions believe AIDS can be transmitted by skin contact.
 
2013-03-14 10:46:31 AM
i220.photobucket.com
How did Ed Wynn become Pope? He's Jewish.....and dead.
 
2013-03-14 10:47:16 AM
Harold Ramis has never gotten more free advertising for his work in his life.
 
2013-03-14 10:47:49 AM

Jon iz teh kewl: francis asissy


Actually, he didn't take the Francis from asisi, he took it from xavier.

No pope will ever be the Francis asisi, he was too jesus like, and required poverty.

Xavier started an inquisition in india. Much more popey
 
2013-03-14 10:49:05 AM
His costume is like a flashier version of the KKK costume
 
2013-03-14 10:49:22 AM
You cannot be an homophobe if you like the dance of Uruguay.
 
2013-03-14 10:49:31 AM
Next pope will be Pope McLovin. Now that's cool!
 
2013-03-14 10:50:22 AM

Godscrack: "visited a hospice to kiss and wash the feet of 12 AIDS patients"

I guess this is an impressive act when your ignorant minions believe AIDS can be transmitted by skin contact.


What the foot of an AIDS patient might look like:
www.reversegangrene.com
 
2013-03-14 10:50:51 AM
img259.imageshack.us
 
2013-03-14 10:51:56 AM

BalugaJoe: I want to learn more about Pope Lando.

i25.photobucket.com
 
2013-03-14 10:53:37 AM

Prank Monkey: Phoenix_M: Prank Monkey: I'm not sure why there is all this surprise/discussion about how he doesn't support gay marraige. Did people actually think the pope of the freakin Catholic church actually would? Really?

I worked for the Jesuits for 15 years. It's the Gay wing of the Catholic church and they all about education and science.

I am going to admit my ignorance about the Catholic church but wouldn't that mean that this is a positive thing? Nothing changes overnight but could that mean that this pope could start things moving in a positive, more modern direction?



That's unlikely. From what I understand he's at odds with the Jesuits in South America on poverty and wealth. They support the church actually advocating for and pressuring governments for solutions to end poverty and change wealth disparity... and he opposes that. Basically, he thinks the church should just continue to use it as a marketing tool, rather then support actual fixes. He talks about pverty plenty, generally in the manner of, "You should be nicer to poor people when you talk to them."

The best we could hope for is that now that he's ostensibly the guy in charge of the church that maybe he might possibly have been suppressing his real feelings on poverty issues, and now feels like he could start actually advocating for changes to the problems he likes to opine about... but that seems unlikely since he opposed the fellow Jesuits who wanted just that.

He's apparently extremely socially conservative, which is probably why he was picked, and so the church joining the modern world on social issues is even less likely... as in - don't hold your breath because it just 'aint gonna happen. He's a staunch anti-gay bigot, and he opposes birth control.

So they picked a pope who previously has led a church that not only turned a blind eye to atrocities during his rule, but actually supported the regime commiting them, is still anachronistic about birth control, and is still bigoted against gays - but also has a carefully crafted image as someone who is against poverty, yet won't go so far as to say we should demand that something actually be done to fix it. So... not really a departure from the last pope whatsoever except he was born on another continent. Whoopty-freakin' doo...
 
2013-03-14 10:54:41 AM
Looks like the liberal demonization of this man is in full swing. After all, the usual liberal crackpots aren't going to do anything positive for this world. They're not going to dedicate their lives to a larger cause, and they're not capable of helping anyone but them selves. All they can do is label, attack, and criticize. That's all they're really capable of as you can see right here.
 
2013-03-14 10:55:01 AM
14. Takes public transportation and lives in a modest home.

The praise he's receiving for flying coach and using public transportation is driving me nuts. He works for a charity; you'd think the church would have a travel policy that bars people from flying business and first class. The less money being spent on premium travel is more money that can go to things like feeding the poor.
 
2013-03-14 10:56:29 AM

busy chillin': one lung and 76. Nice.

And God said unto the Pope "I would rather my children be sad and lonely in the care of orphanage then in a loving home with two dads or moms. And so it was."


Imam so over religion.


i see what you did there.
 
2013-03-14 10:57:11 AM

Mercutio74: BalugaJoe: I want to learn more about Pope Lando.

I think he lost the Popemobile in a card game.


But after one of his Conclave was kidnapped by Jabra the Hut(-dweller), he shows up in the Popemobile wearing the cardinal's clothes.

// it's a weird scene, man
 
2013-03-14 10:57:56 AM

scottydoesntknow: serial_crusher: Takes public transportation and lives in a modest home

what public transportation:
[t2.gstatic.com image 276x183]
and a modest home
[www.theglobalistreport.com image 781x550]
might look like

Those are perks of the job. Unless he orders all the walls to be trimmed in gold, I'm not gonna fault him for moving into the Catholic's version of the White House.

But I doubt that much will change with this pope and every other pope before him.


That's quite a perk for an organization that is a nonprofit. It's not like he's the CEO of Goldman.
 
2013-03-14 10:58:02 AM

Rev. Skarekroe: How do you tango with one lung?  You'd think intense physical activity would be pretty low on the list of things you can do.  But what do I know?


Tango = walking.
 
2013-03-14 10:58:37 AM

stampylives: busy chillin': one lung and 76. Nice.

And God said unto the Pope "I would rather my children be sad and lonely in the care of orphanage then in a loving home with two dads or moms. And so it was."


Imam so over religion.

i see what you did there.


I didn't even see what I did there, so I googled it....that was seriously a typo...crazy how that worked out though.
 
2013-03-14 11:00:17 AM
Pope threads like these should have a Catholic primer for commenters.
 
2013-03-14 11:01:10 AM

weirdneighbour: TheShavingofOccam123: tuna fingers: taco flavored keeses: He used to tango? With only one lung? Everybody knows it takes two to tango. He must be special.

That joke is so frigging awful.  I mean that is probably the most horrid attempt at humor I've ever seen here.
Reported.

[blog.lib.umn.edu image 432x363]

"What he said!"

/worst joke of my youth..."Yesterday was my birthday." "Oh, Happy Birthday! What did you get?" "My daddy's iron lung?" "Really? What did he have to say about it?" "Yuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhh..."

Looks like the kid on the bottom right is getting a little 'upskirt'...giggity


(DINK!)

/Dink. Dink. Dink. Dink. Dink.....Ding
/I wish I didn't have to regularly turn off Family Guy after 15 seconds or so...It can be hilarious
 
2013-03-14 11:01:51 AM
So hes a South American of Italian descent who decided he would take the name of France.

Fascinating.
 
2013-03-14 11:02:05 AM
#29: Every time he handles a little boy's junk, an angel gets his wings.
 
2013-03-14 11:06:10 AM

JohnnyCanuck: 25. Used to http://www.ansa.it/web/notizie/rubriche/english/2013/03/13/Pope-liked- tango_8394775.html">tango with his girlfriend before he "discovered [his] religious vocation."

That's the forbidden dance!


you're thinking of the Tango De La Muerte
 
2013-03-14 11:06:26 AM
This from a man who wears a dress and works exclusively with men. In one of the most gay cities in the world, Vatican City.
 
2013-03-14 11:07:01 AM
Came here for the Phelps "He's Gay" photograph, and leaving much disappointed.
 
2013-03-14 11:07:17 AM
Well, I guess everyone is going to have to start learning Italian.

"Non conosgeve parliamente, signor devo me parlo sono Irallano di Napoil quando il habitare de Milano?"
 
2013-03-14 11:07:20 AM
Why is it a big deal that he used to tango with his girlfriend anyhow?  As opposed to what... tangoing by himself?  I think we're all very clear on the number of people required to tango.
 
2013-03-14 11:07:36 AM
vtesone.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-03-14 11:10:19 AM
I'm just glad we get to use the meme in context now...

Lighten up Francis
 
2013-03-14 11:11:16 AM

Prank Monkey: I'm not sure why there is all this surprise/discussion about how he doesn't support gay marraige. Did people actually think the pope of the freakin Catholic church actually would? Really?


We were expecting them to actually try to fix their image problem and appoint someone that presents at least a mildly nuanced viewpoint and a conciliatory tone, yes.  I mean, the church's primary point of fame for essentially all non-Catholics and a number of Catholics is "condones the gay rape of prepubescent children by clergymen".  So grabbing someone that goes all fire-and-brimstone on sexual issues is pretty much the single stupidest thing they could do here.

I mean, some combination of a resigned "well, render unto Caesar" and maybe a "we hate the sin, but don't hate the sinner, you can't [perform action x] in our churches but you can still confess and attend mass and so on because we don't wanna be dicks about it" is actually pretty par for the course for both Christianity in general and Catholicism in particular, and would cause a lot of criticism to die down.  The church didn't survive half a dozen schisms and a reformation by taking a firm stance and drawing a line in the sand, they've always bent with the wind... so I'm not sure why they're determined to take their faith down in flames with them like the protestants this time.
 
2013-03-14 11:13:19 AM

Prank Monkey: Phoenix_M: Prank Monkey: I'm not sure why there is all this surprise/discussion about how he doesn't support gay marraige. Did people actually think the pope of the freakin Catholic church actually would? Really?

I worked for the Jesuits for 15 years. It's the Gay wing of the Catholic church and they all about education and science.

I am going to admit my ignorance about the Catholic church but wouldn't that mean that this is a positive thing? Nothing changes overnight but could that mean that this pope could start things moving in a positive, more modern direction?



I agree, and there is this:
12. Gave a speech in 2012 "accusing fellow church officials of hypocrisy for forgetting that Jesus Christ bathed lepers and ate with prostitutes."

and

21. Is a critic of the International Monetary Fund and free-market capitalism for contributing to poverty.

Which are steps in the positive direction.
 
2013-03-14 11:13:19 AM

TheShavingofOccam123: Well, I guess everyone is going to have to start learning Italian.

"Non conosgeve parliamente, signor devo me parlo sono Irallano di Napoil quando il habitare de Milano?"


*translation* Hey all you wops, get off of my lawn"

/can't remember what album
 
2013-03-14 11:13:22 AM
#30. Saves on the water bill by following the dictum "Si flavescit, dimittes eam vieta" (if it's yellow, let it mellow). Also suspected of waffle-stomping in the shower.
 
2013-03-14 11:13:29 AM

mikaloyd: Is Pope touching a sport in the gay community?


It's like counting coup.
 
2013-03-14 11:14:05 AM

markfara: new pope


Eh, I prefer Pope Classic.
 
2013-03-14 11:16:15 AM
 
2013-03-14 11:16:36 AM

vernonFL: Pope Lando

When I die and (hopefully) go to Heaven, I want Pope Lando to say to me:


"You look absolutely beautiful. You truly belong here with us among the clouds"



*Applause*
 
2013-03-14 11:17:04 AM

serial_crusher: Takes public transportation and lives in a modest home

what public transportation:
[t2.gstatic.com image 276x183]
and a modest home
[www.theglobalistreport.com image 781x550]
might look like


Well, if you are in charge of a world wide ring of pederasts, you want to have a lot of doors for the cops to knock on, once we find one with enough balls to actually bring you in.
 
2013-03-14 11:17:12 AM

The_Sponge: FTFA:

4. He has taken the name Pope Francis. Not Francis I yet. "It will become Francis I after we have a Francis II," the Vatican said.) It's the first time a new pope has taken a name that hasn't already been used by a former pope since Pope Lando in 913.


I think we just found out which Pope had the coolest name.


L: Lando System?
H: Lando is not a system, he's a pope.
 
2013-03-14 11:18:08 AM
I don't think subby knows how to troll very well. No citation for Note 28 is a complete fail.
 
2013-03-14 11:18:17 AM
I have a feeling that this entire papacy will involve me using up lots of popcorn.
 
2013-03-14 11:18:19 AM

Prank Monkey: Phoenix_M: Prank Monkey: I'm not sure why there is all this surprise/discussion about how he doesn't support gay marraige. Did people actually think the pope of the freakin Catholic church actually would? Really?

I worked for the Jesuits for 15 years. It's the Gay wing of the Catholic church and they all about education and science.

I am going to admit my ignorance about the Catholic church but wouldn't that mean that this is a positive thing? Nothing changes overnight but could that mean that this pope could start things moving in a positive, more modern direction?


That's such a copout. The guy is the pope. He can more or less change whatever he wants by decree. the church isn't a democracy.

And views towards gay marriage have pretty much changed in the United States overnight.
 
2013-03-14 11:18:53 AM
FTFA:   21. Is a critic of the International Monetary Fund and free-market capitalism for contributing to poverty.

Yeah, Republicans will *love* this guy.
 
2013-03-14 11:20:16 AM

mikaloyd: Nevermind all the unimportant stuff. Does the Pope smoke dope ?


Every day.
 
2013-03-14 11:20:33 AM

TikiGawd: "21. Is a critic of the International Monetary Fund and free-market capitalism for contributing to poverty."

One out of twenty-five aint bad. Right?


And the RCC doesn't contribute to poverty with their sexism, anti-contraception, anti-abortion messages?
 
2013-03-14 11:21:22 AM

weirdneighbour: mikaloyd: Nevermind all the unimportant stuff. Does the Pope smoke dope ?

That's what did in his one lung.
/does he poop in the woods?


Where his holiness does his business is his business.
 
2013-03-14 11:23:06 AM
Good for him for serving aids patients, criticizing pastors who refuse to baptize the children of single mothers, and for recognizing that caring for the poor is the role of the church, not the government.
 
2013-03-14 11:24:56 AM

bloatboy: weirdneighbour: mikaloyd: Nevermind all the unimportant stuff. Does the Pope smoke dope ?

That's what did in his one lung.
/does he poop in the woods?

Where his holiness does his business is his business.


Well, I've been using the term 'holy shiat' all my life and I just thought it would be nice too actually see some.
 
2013-03-14 11:32:43 AM

STRYPERSWINE: Good for him for serving aids patients, criticizing pastors who refuse to baptize the children of single mothers, and for recognizing that caring for the poor is the role of the church, not the government.


i148.photobucket.com
 
2013-03-14 11:32:49 AM

LordOfThePings: borg: stuhayes2010: A 76 year old with one lung, I guess we'll be seeing white smoke in the not too distant future.

He's had one lung for 50 years.

He's 76, so he's had one lung for 76 years.


slowclap.gif
 
2013-03-14 11:33:20 AM

The_Sponge: FTFA:

4. He has taken the name Pope Francis. Not Francis I yet. "It will become Francis I after we have a Francis II," the Vatican said.) It's the first time a new pope has taken a name that hasn't already been used by a former pope since Pope Lando in 913.


I think we just found out which Pope had the coolest name.


He is one smoove pope that works every time.
 
2013-03-14 11:34:51 AM

WTF Indeed: Pope threads like these should have a Catholic primer for commenters.


We also need a die-hard Catholic like the Jews have with Tatsuma.
 
2013-03-14 11:35:14 AM
 
2013-03-14 11:36:37 AM

Prank Monkey: I'm not sure why there is all this surprise/discussion about how he doesn't support gay marraige. Did people actually think the pope of the freakin Catholic church actually would? Really?


Are people surprised? No, of course not. I think most hoped he wouldn't be a flaming douchebag like the last Pope, all anti-gay and such.

Oh well, I'm still hoping the Space Pope will come down, eat this human wannabe and then preach the true religion of space and time.

/funny, I don't look drewish
 
2013-03-14 11:36:55 AM
heavymetal:


I agree, and there is this:
12. Gave a speech in 2012 "accusing fellow church officials of hypocrisy for forgetting that Jesus Christ bathed lepers and ate with prostitutes."

and

21. Is a critic of the International Monetary Fund and free-market capitalism for contributing to poverty.

Which are steps in the positive direction.


But he's not gay friendly and opposes abortion.  He is clearly the worst human being on Earth and is in charge of leading the most destructive church on the planet.

Worse than Hitler.
 
2013-03-14 11:37:27 AM

I_C_Weener: stuhayes2010: A 76 year old with one lung, I guess we'll be seeing white smoke in the not too distant future.

This.  I'm trying to figure out the logic here.  Last pope steps down because he got too old for the job...at age 85.  So, they go with a younger one who is healthy, right?


If that's the case then it's not too late to launch my own bid to become the next pope.

WHY YOU SHOULD VOTE FOR POPE GORDON

As pope, I will institute the folllowing changes:
To the Church:

- There will no longer be any problem with being gay or same-sex marriage.
- Premarital sex will be permitted provided that contraception is used.
- Clergy will no longer be required to be celibate. But if we catch any of them touching kids they'll be handed over to the civil authorities straight away along with all of the evidence we have against them.
- Communion wafers will be available in a variety of delicious flavours.

To the office of the Pope itself:

- The Popemobile will be thoroughly pimped out. Hydraulics will be installed.
- The Pope will no longer wear a dress. The pope will wear a custom-tailored zoot suit and dark sunglasses.
- Just to be sure about the clergy no longer being celibate. The Pope will no longer be celibate.
- A wide assortment of merchandise will be sold with all proceeds going to charity. Buy your Pope Gordon action figure today!
 
2013-03-14 11:38:06 AM

walkerhound: We also need a die-hard Catholic like the Jews have with Tatsuma.


There's really no such thing as a diehard Catholic since most "Goes to mass every day" Catholic have been exposed to Jesuits all their life. Jesuits are the hippies of the Catholic Church.
 
2013-03-14 11:38:54 AM
There was a Pope Lando?  Like Pope Lando Calrician?  He was the most awesome Pope ever!!!
 
2013-03-14 11:40:11 AM

show me: What about friggin' John Paul?


You mean, pope john paul george ringo?

/let it be.
 
2013-03-14 11:41:01 AM

Gordon Bennett: - A wide assortment of merchandise will be sold with all proceeds going to charity. Buy your Pope Gordon action figure today!


Same old same old.  I want Change!
 
2013-03-14 11:41:34 AM

borg: The_Sponge: FTFA:

4. He has taken the name Pope Francis. Not Francis I yet. "It will become Francis I after we have a Francis II," the Vatican said.) It's the first time a new pope has taken a name that hasn't already been used by a former pope since Pope Lando in 913.


I think we just found out which Pope had the coolest name.

I think they mean Pope John Paul in 1978


By whom you mean Pope John Paul II?
 
2013-03-14 11:41:42 AM
#29: Was an agitator for the Argentine invasion of the Falklands: "In the fight against the English "heathen" no Argentine churchman was more fanatical than Fr Jorge Piccinalli...."
http://www.thetablet.co.uk/article/4431
 
2013-03-14 11:41:47 AM

xanadian: FTFA:   21. Is a critic of the International Monetary Fund and free-market capitalism for contributing to poverty.

Yeah, Republicans will *love* this guy.


I've read opinions from conservatives where they blast this guy.

I've read opinions from liberals where they blast this guy.

He's doing it right.
 
2013-03-14 11:43:24 AM

bdub77: The_Sponge: FTFA:

4. He has taken the name Pope Francis. Not Francis I yet. "It will become Francis I after we have a Francis II," the Vatican said.) It's the first time a new pope has taken a name that hasn't already been used by a former pope since Pope Lando in 913.


I think we just found out which Pope had the coolest name.

[a4.ec-images.myspacecdn.com image 170x170]



You know why Christians should pray to pope Lando when they ask for anything?

well, because when they pray to pope Lando...

bfcgroup.com
 
2013-03-14 11:43:53 AM
cdn.glockforum.com
 
2013-03-14 11:44:38 AM
He looks like a Chester.
 
2013-03-14 11:46:55 AM

borg: stuhayes2010: A 76 year old with one lung, I guess we'll be seeing white smoke in the not too distant future.

He's had one lung for 50 years.


So he's 76, had a lung removed in his childhood, but was operating on no lungs at all until he was 26 at which point he had a single lung installed?
 
2013-03-14 11:48:24 AM
Da miracles uf da new Pope.

#29: He once cured a ham.
#30: He made a lame man blind.
#31: He walked underwater!
 
2013-03-14 11:49:45 AM

LordOfThePings: borg: stuhayes2010: A 76 year old with one lung, I guess we'll be seeing white smoke in the not too distant future.

He's had one lung for 50 years.

He's 76, so he's had one lung for 76 years.


We weren't talking about HIS lung.
 
2013-03-14 11:53:26 AM

Generation_D: 10. He called Argentina's legalization of gay marriage in 2010 a "destructive attack on God's plan."

11. He argued that gay adoption would "discriminate against children."


Hateful old sh*tbag.


You sound like the hateful one.
 
2013-03-14 11:53:57 AM

vernonFL: Pope Lando

When I die and (hopefully) go to Heaven, I want Pope Lando to say to me:


"You look absolutely beautiful. You truly belong here with us among the clouds"


This is amazing. Thank you.
 
2013-03-14 11:59:11 AM

BalugaJoe: I want to learn more about Pope Lando.


www.i400calci.com
 
2013-03-14 12:02:20 PM

serial_crusher: Gordon Bennett: - A wide assortment of merchandise will be sold with all proceeds going to charity. Buy your Pope Gordon action figure today!

Same old same old.  I want Change!


I'll bet that one isn't anatomically correct.

Plus I'll have Pope hat handbags, Pope T-shirts, Pope tea towels, Pope posters, mugs, clocks, energy drinks, Soda Pope, Pope Soap on a Rope and to bring the authentic scent of Mass home, Pope-pourri.
 
2013-03-14 12:03:28 PM

thornhill: 14. Takes public transportation and lives in a modest home.

The praise he's receiving for flying coach and using public transportation is driving me nuts. He works for a charity; you'd think the church would have a travel policy that bars people from flying business and first class. The less money being spent on premium travel is more money that can go to things like golden thrones feeding the poor.

 
2013-03-14 12:03:34 PM

markfara: He's a very humble man, from what I've been hearing.

Like, from every single news outlet throughout most of the afternoon and evening yesterday, every two minutes or so, over and over and over and over and over. . . .

There were also a lot of priests and Catholic Church scholars on TV remarking on how humble he is.

Chris Matthews said on his show last night that he has high hopes for this pope, because the guy's really humble.

Apparently, the new pope is a very humble man.


Yesterday when he appeared on the balcony I saw a spider web behind him that spelled out "SOME POPE".
 
2013-03-14 12:05:06 PM

Renart: Yesterday when he appeared on the balcony I saw a spider web behind him that spelled out "SOME POPE".


That's TERRIFIC.
 
2013-03-14 12:06:00 PM
10. He called Argentina's legalization of gay marriage in 2010 a "destructive attack on God's plan."
11. He argued that gay adoption would "discriminate against children."
12. Gave a speech in 2012 "accusing fellow church officials of hypocrisy for forgetting that Jesus Christ bathed lepers and ate with prostitutes."


One of these things is not like the other...
 
2013-03-14 12:07:57 PM

The_Sponge: FTFA:

4. He has taken the name Pope Francis. Not Francis I yet. "It will become Francis I after we have a Francis II," the Vatican said.) It's the first time a new pope has taken a name that hasn't already been used by a former pope since Pope Lando in 913.


I think we just found out which Pope had the coolest name.


24.media.tumblr.com

He also had fantastic hair and a very loyal assistant.
 
2013-03-14 12:08:21 PM
Off topic, but on topic for the tango sub-discussion in thread: Anyone remember the fictional dance (tango, maybe?) that is something like "so sexy that when the dance is done the woman is pregnant"?  I wanna say simpsons, but I can't find it.
 
2013-03-14 12:09:27 PM

SavageWombat: borg: The_Sponge: FTFA:

4. He has taken the name Pope Francis. Not Francis I yet. "It will become Francis I after we have a Francis II," the Vatican said.) It's the first time a new pope has taken a name that hasn't already been used by a former pope since Pope Lando in 913.


I think we just found out which Pope had the coolest name.

I think they mean Pope John Paul in 1978

By whom you mean Pope John Paul II?


There were three Popes in 1978, Two of which took the name John Paul.
 
2013-03-14 12:09:42 PM

Xyphoid: Off topic, but on topic for the tango sub-discussion in thread: Anyone remember the fictional dance (tango, maybe?) that is something like "so sexy that when the dance is done the woman is pregnant"?  I wanna say simpsons, but I can't find it.


The Tango De La Muerte.  Your welcome.  Now go sugar your own churro.
 
2013-03-14 12:12:59 PM
FTFA:  Used to tango with his girlfriend before he "discovered [his] religious vocation.

There's probably some poor Argentinian guy getting nagged tonight: "I could have danced away with Jorge instead and been Mrs. Pope instead of being married to a thieving options trader."
 
2013-03-14 12:13:27 PM

MNguy: xanadian: FTFA:   21. Is a critic of the International Monetary Fund and free-market capitalism for contributing to poverty.

Yeah, Republicans will *love* this guy.

I've read opinions from conservatives where they blast this guy.

I've read opinions from liberals where they blast this guy.

He's doing it right.


Or he has no clue what he's talking about on monetary policy.
 
2013-03-14 12:15:04 PM

weirdneighbour: Well, I've been using the term 'holy shiat' all my life and I just thought it would be nice too actually see some.


Where do you live?
We may be able to arrange that on your front doorstep for you.
/God spelled backwards = Dog. : )
 
2013-03-14 12:17:16 PM

thornhill: MNguy: xanadian: FTFA:   21. Is a critic of the International Monetary Fund and free-market capitalism for contributing to poverty.

Yeah, Republicans will *love* this guy.

I've read opinions from conservatives where they blast this guy.

I've read opinions from liberals where they blast this guy.

He's doing it right.

Or he has no clue what he's talking about on monetary policy.


But he's great on social policy amiright?
 
2013-03-14 12:27:03 PM

SDRR: nekom: Rev. Skarekroe: nekom: Had a lung removed as a child?  That's pretty odd in itself.  That's usually associated with an older person either in the coal mining industry, asbestos or heavy smoker.  Must have been one doozy of an infection if it prompted them to remove a lung from a child.

He also used to tango a lot?  How do you tango with one lung?  You'd think intense physical activity would be pretty low on the list of things you can do.  But what do I know?

Well, that's miracle #1 then, right? So he only needs one more to become a saint. Or do they have to be posthumous miracles? My wife is vaguely Catholic but I admit I know little to nothing about it.

Aren't they all?


Quite a few are. I've heard the term "Social Mormon" used to describe people who really don't believe any of the hooplah, but their parents and friends are Mormons so they go through the motions. In that sense, I suppose the term "Social Catholic" fits my wife best. I'm not Catholic, and our wedding was at a small United Methodist church. Living in sin and all that.
 
2013-03-14 12:28:33 PM

SavageWombat: borg: The_Sponge: FTFA:

4. He has taken the name Pope Francis. Not Francis I yet. "It will become Francis I after we have a Francis II," the Vatican said.) It's the first time a new pope has taken a name that hasn't already been used by a former pope since Pope Lando in 913.


I think we just found out which Pope had the coolest name.

I think they mean Pope John Paul in 1978

By whom you mean Pope John Paul II?


No, JP one served one month (33 days) and was found dead (he likely had help with that).  JP two took the name in his honor.
 
2013-03-14 12:29:24 PM

WhoopAssWayne: Looks like the liberal demonization of this man is in full swing. After all, the usual liberal crackpots aren't going to do anything positive for this world. They're not going to dedicate their lives to a larger cause, and they're not capable of helping anyone but them selves. All they can do is label, attack, and criticize. That's all they're really capable of as you can see right here.


Everything bad is caused by libs. Everything.

I've seen you write things that aren't batshiat insane, why do you always go back to the crazy?
 
2013-03-14 12:33:23 PM

No Such Agency: Hmm...


You never noticed the Trade Federation wore vaguely Catholic garb?  The hats and robes?

They were a racial stereotype wrapped in a religious stereotype wrapped in an epic ball of failure.
 
2013-03-14 12:36:10 PM
WhoopAssWayne: Looks like the liberal demonization of this man is in full swing. After all, the usual liberal crackpots aren't going to do anything positive for this world. They're not going to dedicate their lives to a larger cause, and they're not capable of helping anyone but them selves. All they can do is label, attack, and criticize. That's all they're really capable of as you can see right here.

You might want to look up the words "liberal" and "conservative".  One is, by definition, more likely to help others than the other, whoopass.  Everything you said sounds like what Jesus would do.  Jesus.  Not you.Also, not Jesus.
 
2013-03-14 12:36:49 PM

show me: The_Sponge: FTFA:

4. He has taken the name Pope Francis. Not Francis I yet. "It will become Francis I after we have a Francis II," the Vatican said.) It's the first time a new pope has taken a name that hasn't already been used by a former pope since Pope Lando in 913.


I think we just found out which Pope had the coolest name.

What about friggin' John Paul? Granted, both names had been used individually before, but not in combination.


What about Steve Dave?
 
2013-03-14 12:46:18 PM
Severe homophobia?  Guess he's also a closet-gay pope. Good for him.
 
2013-03-14 12:48:15 PM

thornhill: Those are perks of the job. Unless he orders all the walls to be trimmed in gold, I'm not gonna fault him for moving into the Catholic's version of the White House.

But I doubt that much will change with this pope and every other pope before him.

That's quite a perk for an organization that is a nonprofit. It's not like he's the CEO of Goldman.


But he is the leader of a sovereign nation.
 
2013-03-14 12:53:24 PM

The_Sponge: FTFA:

4. He has taken the name Pope Francis. Not Francis I yet. "It will become Francis I after we have a Francis II," the Vatican said.) It's the first time a new pope has taken a name that hasn't already been used by a former pope since Pope Lando in 913.


I think we just found out which Pope had the coolest name.


"Well, look at you, a Pope!"

"Somebody must have told them about my little maneuver at the Battle of Taanab."
 
2013-03-14 12:55:03 PM
i.imgur.com
 
2013-03-14 12:55:18 PM

Madame Ovary: And the RCC doesn't contribute to poverty with their sexism, anti-contraception, anti-abortion messages?


They do, but only if you consider genocide a legitimate anti-poverty strategy.
 
2013-03-14 01:00:53 PM
Dr. Whoof:
No Such Agency: Hmm...

You never noticed the Trade Federation wore vaguely Catholic garb?  The hats and robes?

They were a racial stereotype wrapped in a religious stereotype wrapped in an epic ball of failure.


Yeah, I kind of lost track of all the fail in that movie.  I don't know what making them look vaguely Catholic would be all about, except lazy art design. <- BINGO!...
 
2013-03-14 01:07:03 PM

thomps: - he was one of the popes to rule during the period of the papacy known as the "pornocracy"


I don't think so. That was 500 years later.
 
2013-03-14 01:20:25 PM

markfara: He's a very humble man, from what I've been hearing.

Like, from every single news outlet throughout most of the afternoon and evening yesterday, every two minutes or so, over and over and over and over and over. . . .

There were also a lot of priests and Catholic Church scholars on TV remarking on how humble he is.

Chris Matthews said on his show last night that he has high hopes for this pope, because the guy's really humble.

Apparently, the new pope is a very humble man.


Maybe he is Uriah Heep reborn!
 
2013-03-14 01:37:15 PM

Prank Call of Cthulhu: #30. Saves on the water bill by following the dictum "Si flavescit, dimittes eam vieta" (if it's yellow, let it mellow). Also suspected of waffle-stomping in the shower.


I don't know what this means... but I'm afraid to google it at work.
 
2013-03-14 01:37:57 PM

LordOfThePings: borg: stuhayes2010: A 76 year old with one lung, I guess we'll be seeing white smoke in the not too distant future.

He's had one lung for 50 years.

He's 76, so he's had one lung for 76 years.


You're not good at this whole reading and thinking thing, are you?
 
gja [TotalFark]
2013-03-14 01:38:54 PM

TheShavingofOccam123: tuna fingers: taco flavored keeses: He used to tango? With only one lung? Everybody knows it takes two to tango. He must be special.

That joke is so frigging awful.  I mean that is probably the most horrid attempt at humor I've ever seen here.
Reported.

[blog.lib.umn.edu image 432x363]

"What he said!"

/worst joke of my youth..."Yesterday was my birthday." "Oh, Happy Birthday! What did you get?" "My daddy's iron lung?" "Really? What did he have to say about it?" "Yuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhh..."


Oh shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiat. That's AWFUL!

/:::snort:::, i still laughed, "room for 1 more on the express to fire/brimstone?"
 
2013-03-14 01:44:01 PM

Darke: I don't know what this means... but I'm afraid to google it at work.


Here's a hint.

i.qkme.me
 
2013-03-14 01:47:01 PM

Prank Call of Cthulhu: Darke: I don't know what this means... but I'm afraid to google it at work.

Here's a hint.

[i.qkme.me image 500x458]


Sighhh.... yep, glad i didn't GIS that.
/cringe
 
2013-03-14 01:49:59 PM

I_C_Weener: stuhayes2010: A 76 year old with one lung, I guess we'll be seeing white smoke in the not too distant future.

This.  I'm trying to figure out the logic here.  Last pope steps down because he got too old for the job...at age 85.  So, they go with a younger one who is healthy, right?


Look. The pool of possible papal hopefuls comes from the Cardinals themselves who are voting on it. Of course they're going to elect the oldest dude, so they can live to take a shot at the spot.
 
2013-03-14 01:58:52 PM

Jaws75: How many people boast about being sincere advocates for the poor because the "live modestly" and yet at the same time have vacation homes?


How many vacation homes? Just one. Modesty!
 
2013-03-14 02:05:05 PM
16. Goes to bed at 9:30 p.m. and wakes at 4:30 a.m.

One point that I have in common with the pontiff.
 
2013-03-14 02:05:46 PM
i.imgur.com
 
2013-03-14 02:12:26 PM

nekom: SDRR: nekom: Rev. Skarekroe: nekom: Had a lung removed as a child?  That's pretty odd in itself.  That's usually associated with an older person either in the coal mining industry, asbestos or heavy smoker.  Must have been one doozy of an infection if it prompted them to remove a lung from a child.

He also used to tango a lot?  How do you tango with one lung?  You'd think intense physical activity would be pretty low on the list of things you can do.  But what do I know?

Well, that's miracle #1 then, right? So he only needs one more to become a saint. Or do they have to be posthumous miracles? My wife is vaguely Catholic but I admit I know little to nothing about it.

Aren't they all?

Quite a few are. I've heard the term "Social Mormon" used to describe people who really don't believe any of the hooplah, but their parents and friends are Mormons so they go through the motions. In that sense, I suppose the term "Social Catholic" fits my wife best. I'm not Catholic, and our wedding was at a small United Methodist church. Living in sin and all that.


We call it "Cultural" - Jewish, Mormon, Catholic - where you live the lifestyle, but don't hold the beliefs.

I consider myself culturally Lutheran. I like cement basement potlucks with hot dish, dessert bars and Jell-O salad.
 
2013-03-14 02:14:27 PM

fartacus: Generation_D: 10. He called Argentina's legalization of gay marriage in 2010 a "destructive attack on God's plan."

11. He argued that gay adoption would "discriminate against children."


Hateful old sh*tbag.

You sound like the hateful one

     Its

fake outrage. He is just another brainwashed fool that thinks even if he doesn't believe homosexuality is normal he has to at least appear to agree with the overly vocal politically correct minority lest he be ridiculed by strangers on the internet and called horrible overused names like homophobe or intolerant.
 
2013-03-14 02:14:45 PM

vernonFL: Pope Lando

When I die and (hopefully) go to Heaven, I want Pope Lando to say to me:


"You look absolutely beautiful. You truly belong here with us among the clouds"


You've just won the internet.
 
2013-03-14 02:26:45 PM

Ohlookabutterfly: fartacus: Generation_D: 10. He called Argentina's legalization of gay marriage in 2010 a "destructive attack on God's plan."

11. He argued that gay adoption would "discriminate against children."


Hateful old sh*tbag.

You sound like the hateful one

     Its fake outrage. He is just another brainwashed fool that thinks even if he doesn't believe homosexuality is normal he has to at least appear to agree with the overly vocal politically correct minority lest he be ridiculed by strangers on the internet and called horrible overused names like homophobe or intolerant.


Or maybe he just doesn't approve of bigotry, you know, like a decent human being.
 
2013-03-14 02:26:45 PM

Ohlookabutterfly: Its fake outrage. He is just another brainwashed fool that thinks even if he doesn't believe homosexuality is normal he has to at least appear to agree with the overly vocal politically correct minority lest he be ridiculed by strangers on the internet and called horrible overused names like homophobe or intolerant.


Oh, look, a dumbshiat.
 
2013-03-14 02:30:21 PM
From what I heard he had _1_lobe_ removed from his lungs.
Human left lung has 2 lobes, and the right lung has 3 lobes.
So he'd still have approximately 80% lung function.

/I'm no papalatrician, but I play one on the internet...
 
2013-03-14 02:32:27 PM

Madame Ovary: And the RCC doesn't contribute to poverty with their sexism, anti-contraception, anti-abortion messages?


Ok, so scratch that one...
 
2013-03-14 02:35:32 PM

Magnus: LordOfThePings: borg: stuhayes2010: A 76 year old with one lung, I guess we'll be seeing white smoke in the not too distant future.

He's had one lung for 50 years.

He's 76, so he's had one lung for 76 years.

You're not good at this whole reading and thinking thing, are you?


Wooosh
 
2013-03-14 02:36:16 PM
hes also supposed to be the last pope .Apparently after him comes hell.
Im not a Catholic and really not sure which graven images to bow down before and which ones to simply pay respects to... so I could be wrong. But to be on the safe side I think ill go torture some 'heretics'.Ill  watch a few blockbuster movies to get some pointers on how to do that
 
2013-03-14 02:45:35 PM

The_Sponge: FTFA:

4. He has taken the name Pope Francis. Not Francis I yet. "It will become Francis I after we have a Francis II," the Vatican said.) It's the first time a new pope has taken a name that hasn't already been used by a former pope since Pope Lando in 913.


I think we just found out which Pope had the coolest name.

 
2013-03-14 02:56:53 PM

HighOnCraic: The_Sponge: FTFA:

4. He has taken the name Pope Francis. Not Francis I yet. "It will become Francis I after we have a Francis II," the Vatican said.) It's the first time a new pope has taken a name that hasn't already been used by a former pope since Pope Lando in 913.


I think we just found out which Pope had the coolest name.


newkidsonthenet.com
 
2013-03-14 03:14:03 PM

thornhill: The less money being spent on premium travel is more money that can go to things like feeding the poor.


If you feed them too much, they just breed more.
 
2013-03-14 03:27:34 PM

Ohlookabutterfly: fartacus: Generation_D: 10. He called Argentina's legalization of gay marriage in 2010 a "destructive attack on God's plan."

11. He argued that gay adoption would "discriminate against children."


Hateful old sh*tbag.

You sound like the hateful one


Corrected for 1950:

     Its fake outrage. He is just another brainwashed fool that thinks even if he doesn't believe homosexuality blacks and whites marrying is normal he has to at least appear to agree with the overly vocal politically correct minority lest he be ridiculed by strangers on the internet and called horrible overused names like homophobe racists or intolerant.

When you take it upon yourself to dictate what's normal and acceptable behavior, and believe that only certain laws should apply to people who meet your standards, you're intolerant.
 
2013-03-14 03:28:23 PM

WeenerGord: thornhill: The less money being spent on premium travel is more money that can go to things like feeding the poor.

If you feed them too much, they just breed more.


Isn't that what they want?
 
2013-03-14 03:42:28 PM

Darke: Prank Call of Cthulhu: #30. Saves on the water bill by following the dictum "Si flavescit, dimittes eam vieta" (if it's yellow, let it mellow). Also suspected of waffle-stomping in the shower.

I don't know what this means... but I'm afraid to google it at work.


It means to do that ridiculous stiff-legged stompy Nazi march thing that the Waffle SS liked to do.

algosandblues.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-03-14 03:46:48 PM

Gordon Bennett: Waffle SS


You vill yoos maple syrrrrup! VASS IS DAS? MARGARINE?!?! VEE ONLY YOOS BUTTER HERE, UNTERMENTSCH!
 
2013-03-14 03:56:53 PM

vernonFL: Pope Lando

When I die and (hopefully) go to Heaven, I want Pope Lando to say to me:


"You look absolutely beautiful. You truly belong here with us among the clouds"


There are no Catholics in heaven.
 
2013-03-14 03:57:30 PM
#36: was heard shouting across St. Peter's Square " YOU ATE MY SANDWICH? ...... MY SANDWICH!"
 
2013-03-14 03:58:09 PM

ImpatientlyUnsympathetic: nekom: SDRR: nekom: Rev. Skarekroe: nekom: Had a lung removed as a child?  That's pretty odd in itself.  That's usually associated with an older person either in the coal mining industry, asbestos or heavy smoker.  Must have been one doozy of an infection if it prompted them to remove a lung from a child.

He also used to tango a lot?  How do you tango with one lung?  You'd think intense physical activity would be pretty low on the list of things you can do.  But what do I know?

Well, that's miracle #1 then, right? So he only needs one more to become a saint. Or do they have to be posthumous miracles? My wife is vaguely Catholic but I admit I know little to nothing about it.

Aren't they all?

Quite a few are. I've heard the term "Social Mormon" used to describe people who really don't believe any of the hooplah, but their parents and friends are Mormons so they go through the motions. In that sense, I suppose the term "Social Catholic" fits my wife best. I'm not Catholic, and our wedding was at a small United Methodist church. Living in sin and all that.

We call it "Cultural" - Jewish, Mormon, Catholic - where you live the lifestyle, but don't hold the beliefs.

I consider myself culturally Lutheran. I like cement basement potlucks with hot dish, dessert bars and Jell-O salad.


Ditto. I use the term "culturally Mormon": we have enough food on hand for three days, make enough food during meals to feed an army, keep an open chair at the table during meals (I think that one has something to do with the prophet Elijah?); and big on family and spending time with family, "Family Night", and all that.

Do I go to church? Well, yeah, but not a Mormon one. I'm UU now. I'll be excommunicated from the Mormon church once my grandparents die.

At least Mormons don't have the guilt trips that Catholics do. You are allowed to enjoy sex (and for some reason, Mormons have a stereotype of being VERY kinky in bed).
 
2013-03-14 04:09:53 PM

Peki: Ditto. I use the term "culturally Mormon": we have enough food on hand for three days, make enough food during meals to feed an army, keep an open chair at the table during meals (I think that one has something to do with the prophet Elijah?); and big on family and spending time with family, "Family Night", and all that.


You're culturally Mormon, but don't know Mormon culture.

Right.
 
2013-03-14 04:11:30 PM

Magnus: LordOfThePings: He's 76, so he's had one lung for 76 years.

You're not good at this whole reading and thinking thing, are you?


Wuchoo mean? I reed gud. My brane gud.
 
2013-03-14 04:28:38 PM
Any of you HO-mos questions my views on Gay Marriage....I'll excommunicate ya.
 
2013-03-14 05:32:28 PM

mongbiohazard: STRYPERSWINE: Good for him for serving aids patients, criticizing pastors who refuse to baptize the children of single mothers, and for recognizing that caring for the poor is the role of the church, not the government.

[i148.photobucket.com image 108x120]


RTFA
 
2013-03-14 05:58:22 PM

STRYPERSWINE: mongbiohazard: STRYPERSWINE: Good for him for serving aids patients, criticizing pastors who refuse to baptize the children of single mothers, and for recognizing that caring for the poor is the role of the church, not the government.

[i148.photobucket.com image 108x120]

RTFA


I did. In fact, I just went and checked it again. Nothing in there that says that the government has no role in caring for the poor their own society creates...... which is an entirely idiotic thing to say.
 
2013-03-14 05:59:57 PM
At least now I won't be seeing pictures of emperor Palpatine Pope Benedict in the news
guy farkin' creeps me out.

// I have no desire to touch the pope
 
2013-03-14 06:30:01 PM

mongbiohazard: Ohlookabutterfly: fartacus: Generation_D: 10. He called Argentina's legalization of gay marriage in 2010 a "destructive attack on God's plan."

11. He argued that gay adoption would "discriminate against children."


Hateful old sh*tbag.

You sound like the hateful one

     Its fake outrage. He is just another brainwashed fool that thinks even if he doesn't believe homosexuality is normal he has to at least appear to agree with the overly vocal politically correct minority lest he be ridiculed by strangers on the internet and called horrible overused names like homophobe or intolerant.

Or maybe he just doesn't approve of bigotry, you know, like a decent human being.


His beliefs about marriage and family do not make him a bigot or an indecent human, regardless of what you may think about those beliefs. And lest you think I'm a Catholic apologist, I'm an atheist who supports full rights for gay partners. I'm not in favor of redefining words to satisfy politically correct liberal doublethink.
 
2013-03-14 06:39:50 PM

koder: Severe homophobia?  Guess he's also a closet-gay pope. Good for him.


closet GAY?  he's raped like 5 kids.  more like sexual offender!
 
2013-03-14 07:12:03 PM

TheOther: 12. Gave a speech in 2012 "accusing fellow church officials of hypocrisy for forgetting that Jesus Christ bathed lepers and ate with prostitutes."

Christianity would be a kickass religion if that was 'ate lepers and bathed with prostitutes'.


But what if she's a prostitute AND a leper?
 
2013-03-14 07:14:01 PM

karnal: I read he likes to suck the filling out of the jelly donuts, puts them back and then sits back and waits for someone to grab one.   And then he laughs........and laughs


"No, we're outta jelly donuts"
 
2013-03-14 07:22:09 PM

WhoopAssWayne: Looks like the liberal demonization of this man is in full swing. After all, the usual liberal crackpots aren't going to do anything positive for this world. They're not going to dedicate their lives to a larger cause, and they're not capable of helping anyone but them selves. All they can do is label, attack, and criticize. That's all they're really capable of as you can see right here.


I don't know.  You're doing a pretty good job of making liberals look good.
 
2013-03-14 07:32:24 PM

No Such Agency: serial_crusher:

[www.theglobalistreport.com image 389x274]

[www.bwafer.com image 392x202]

Hmm...


A communications disruption can mean only one thing ... invasion.
 
2013-03-14 09:16:07 PM
Remember folks.  The majority of cross-dressers are actually heterosexual, and many are also homophobic.
 
2013-03-14 09:19:19 PM

thornhill: Ohlookabutterfly: fartacus: Generation_D: 10. He called Argentina's legalization of gay marriage in 2010 a "destructive attack on God's plan."

11. He argued that gay adoption would "discriminate against children."


Hateful old sh*tbag.

You sound like the hateful one

Corrected for 1950:

     Its fake outrage. He is just another brainwashed fool that thinks even if he doesn't believe homosexuality blacks and whites marrying is normal he has to at least appear to agree with the overly vocal politically correct minority lest he be ridiculed by strangers on the internet and called horrible overused names like homophobe racists or intolerant.

When you take it upon yourself to dictate what's normal and acceptable behavior, and believe that only certain laws should apply to people who meet your standards, you're intolerant.


  Your oh so typical censoring of my point and putting words in my mouth is quite disgusting. You are so dumb you don't see that your last paragraph is exactly what I am saying. YOU liberal holier-than-though retards don't get to tell me or anyone else what is normal or acceptable. The pope is standing up for his beliefs and I am as well. I was raised to believe in the classic North American family which includes a mother, father, and children. I really don't give a flying fark what any other consensual adults choose to do in the privacy of their own home as it is none of my business but nobody can force me to believe it is acceptable to define yourself by your sexual preferences publicly nor minimize my view of what a normal family should be. I don't hate anyone as a group for their tastes or feelings for others, I just don't want to hear about it constantly nor do I feel it is ok to preach homosexuality being normal to my children in public schools any more than I find it acceptable for them to be taught a religion I don't believe in.
  I believe we are ALL born as equals on this earth. Go ahead, be gay, it doesn't affect my life one bit just shut the hell up about it already because I'm tired of you asshole thought police farkwads trying to tell me how to think and feel.
 
2013-03-14 09:31:09 PM

Ohlookabutterfly: thornhill: Ohlookabutterfly: fartacus: Generation_D: 10. He called Argentina's legalization of gay marriage in 2010 a "destructive attack on God's plan."

11. He argued that gay adoption would "discriminate against children."


Hateful old sh*tbag.

You sound like the hateful one

Corrected for 1950:

     Its fake outrage. He is just another brainwashed fool that thinks even if he doesn't believe homosexuality blacks and whites marrying is normal he has to at least appear to agree with the overly vocal politically correct minority lest he be ridiculed by strangers on the internet and called horrible overused names like homophobe racists or intolerant.

When you take it upon yourself to dictate what's normal and acceptable behavior, and believe that only certain laws should apply to people who meet your standards, you're intolerant.

  Your oh so typical censoring of my point and putting words in my mouth is quite disgusting. You are so dumb you don't see that your last paragraph is exactly what I am saying. YOU liberal holier-than-though retards don't get to tell me or anyone else what is normal or acceptable. The pope is standing up for his beliefs and I am as well. I was raised to believe in the classic North American family which includes a mother, father, and children. I really don't give a flying fark what any other consensual adults choose to do in the privacy of their own home as it is none of my business but nobody can force me to believe it is acceptable to define yourself by your sexual preferences publicly nor minimize my view of what a normal family should be. I don't hate anyone as a group for their tastes or feelings for others, I just don't want to hear about it constantly nor do I feel it is ok to preach homosexuality being normal to my children in public schools any more than I find it acceptable for them to be taught a religion I don't believe in.
  I believe we are ALL born as equals on this earth.
Go ahead, be gay, it doesn't affect my life one ...


You're contradicting yourself.

You say that being a homosexual is abnormal, but we're also all equals. So then are abnormal people the same as normal people? And if so, then why call anyone abnormal?
 
2013-03-14 10:51:21 PM

biyaaatci: Now go sugar your own churro.


Consider this stolen.
 
2013-03-14 11:50:03 PM

Arthen: [cdn.glockforum.com image 632x525]


I can't believe that took over 100 posts.
 
2013-03-15 12:36:41 AM

karnal: Godscrack: "visited a hospice to kiss and wash the feet of 12 AIDS patients"

I guess this is an impressive act when your ignorant minions believe AIDS can be transmitted by skin contact.

What the foot of an AIDS patient might look like:
[www.reversegangrene.com image 348x221]


Sure that's not Sgt. Hulka's big toe that he's gonna see how far he can shove up our arse....?
 
2013-03-15 01:18:40 AM

arethereanybeernamesleft: Peki: Ditto. I use the term "culturally Mormon": we have enough food on hand for three days, make enough food during meals to feed an army, keep an open chair at the table during meals (I think that one has something to do with the prophet Elijah?); and big on family and spending time with family, "Family Night", and all that.

You're culturally Mormon, but don't know Mormon culture.

Right.


My family is in California, not Utah, so lighten up, Francis. My grandfather has been installed as a high priest, and regularly does those posthumous baptisms that everyone gets in arms over (serve the purpose of "standing in" for the dead person to be baptized). There were things I didn't list, like always wearing dresses at church (when usually the women I see wear pants nowadays). I left the church when the bishop told me that if I ever had the choice between family and college, that I should always remember the first commandment in the bible: Be fruitful and multiply.

*sigh*
 
2013-03-15 02:01:28 AM
If any of you infidels touch him, he will lose his ability to foresee the future!
 
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