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(Lehighton Times News)   "Asked why she was nude from the waist down, Hayes said it was because she was anticipating having sex"   (tnonline.com) divider line 93
    More: Amusing, Lansford  
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20644 clicks; posted to Main » on 14 Mar 2013 at 4:29 AM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



93 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-03-13 11:42:19 PM  
Who the fark are these farking people who do this farking stupid shiat?
 
2013-03-13 11:50:55 PM  
At least that dude had his priorities straight - finish that xbox game and tell that biatch she can wait...
 
2013-03-14 12:11:22 AM  
I'm gonna guess this is an article that is best without pics of any of those involved.
 
2013-03-14 12:19:28 AM  
Can't judge my level of outrage without pics.
 
2013-03-14 12:22:46 AM  
I read Hayes as Hayek and immediately came.


You know what Hayek I'm talkin about....

Ohhhhh yeah baby....
www.biography.com
 
2013-03-14 12:31:04 AM  
Without pics I don't know if this hot or gross.

To fap or not to fap...
 
2013-03-14 01:21:50 AM  

bronyaur1: Who the fark are these farking people who do this farking stupid shiat?


average IQ is 100 ... the 80s and 90s are let roam the street on their own
 
2013-03-14 01:44:38 AM  
I wonder how many dudes saw her address and that she was DTF and headed over.

She bit him on the left forearm, and grabbed his testicles and began to twist them.

Good times.

/don't put your dick in crazy.
 
2013-03-14 01:54:50 AM  
Seems reasonable...
 
2013-03-14 02:31:55 AM  
She's naked below the waist, and the guy goes 'I'll stick with my game, that I've been playing for 2 days".  Either she's a fat blob, he's gay, or it's the most addictive Xbox game ever.
 
2013-03-14 04:33:25 AM  

Alphax: She's naked below the waist, and the guy goes 'I'll stick with my game, that I've been playing for 2 days".  Either she's a fat blob, he's gay, or it's the most addictive Xbox game ever.


She's a fat blob, he's gay, and he's finishing off Halo 4?
 
2013-03-14 04:35:35 AM  
She sounds fat.
 
xcv
2013-03-14 04:36:45 AM  

bdub77: I read Hayes as Hayek and immediately came.


You know what Hayek I'm talkin about....

Ohhhhh yeah baby....
[www.biography.com image 402x402]


Less known for his hip hop career.
 
2013-03-14 04:38:31 AM  
This is why I never wear pants myself.
 
2013-03-14 04:39:47 AM  
FTA:
"the two were at his house and that Hayes became argumentative when he refused to have sex with her. He said the argument escalated, and that Hayes began to slap and punch him about the head and back. She bit him on the left forearm, and grabbed his testicles and began to twist them...

Asked why she was nude from the waist down, Hayes said it was because she was anticipating having sex, and that she didn't want to go upstairs and put on pants before following Zuber to the convenience store. "


She sounds like a keeper.

No, not really,   Run.  Run away screaming.  Now, young man.
 
2013-03-14 04:43:51 AM  
What's her fark handle? Are her knees sharp? Would I hit it?

/Came for pics, (going to sleep now), but hope I'm not disappointed...
 
2013-03-14 04:44:45 AM  
Devolving_Spud:

She sounds like a keeper.

No, not really,   Run.  Run away screaming.  Now, young man.


Sounds like he already did.
 
Skr
2013-03-14 04:46:35 AM  
web.mit.edu

I'll take my crazy in manageable amounts, please.
 
2013-03-14 04:53:30 AM  
Found her!

i1162.photobucket.com

You're welcome.
 
2013-03-14 04:56:42 AM  
They could try to make the satire of that fake article more obvious, but they would fail.
 
2013-03-14 04:59:21 AM  

"Asked why she was nude from the waist down, Hayes said it was because she was anticipating having sex"


4.bp.blogspot.com
SURVEY SAYS!

 
2013-03-14 05:00:58 AM  

Lionel Mandrake: Without pics I don't know if this hot or gross.

To fap or not to fap...


Given that the dude would rather play video games than fark her, I'd say the odds favor "gross".

/but you would fap anyway
 
2013-03-14 05:03:01 AM  
i found this. probably wrong person but at least i tried.

www.iukcougars.com

http://www.iukcougars.com/images/2012-13/HeatherHayes.jpg
 
2013-03-14 05:10:54 AM  
So, that answers one question.

Next question, if she was anticipating sex, did she bring the flour?

(sorry)
 
2013-03-14 05:13:24 AM  
How did they know she was naked?
 
2013-03-14 05:16:57 AM  

Lionel Mandrake: Without pics I don't know if this hot or gross.

To fap or not to fap...


From what I was able to find, go with 1) gross and 2) not to fap.
 
2013-03-14 05:21:15 AM  
No need for fat hate: the crazy eye is quite enough to be getting on with.
 
2013-03-14 05:21:29 AM  
She...grabbed his testicles and began to twist them.


Well good for her, that's exactly what you're supposed to do to a rapist.

Oh wait...she was the rapist. Never mind then.
 
2013-03-14 05:21:49 AM  
...he saw a female standing by the trash container, nude from the waist down.

Thousands of flies were observed fleeing the scene with tiny clothespins on their noses.
 
2013-03-14 05:31:39 AM  

Alphax: .  Either she's a fat blob,


ih3.redbubble.net
 
2013-03-14 05:47:36 AM  
Imagine the poor cop who had to see that. I'll bet he requested a transfer to homicide.
 
2013-03-14 05:48:28 AM  
Fark delivers. She looks EXACTLY as I envisioned when I read the graphic description of her behavior in the article.
 
2013-03-14 05:53:51 AM  
If you happen to troll their FB pages, you'll notice the gap around the time of this story.  And then the message about hearing from his love who is "out of town."  Makes me feel a little better about myself.
 
2013-03-14 06:00:08 AM  
Am I the only one creeped out by the "half staff widget" on the right side of the page?
 
2013-03-14 06:32:00 AM  
That's a fat 24.
 
2013-03-14 06:34:15 AM  
Why is it that women get so angry when refused sex?
 
2013-03-14 06:36:41 AM  

JT82: If you happen to troll their FB pages, you'll notice the gap around the time of this story.  And then the message about hearing from his love who is "out of town."  Makes me feel a little better about myself.


Noticed that too (it amazes me that some people will still leave their entire profiles public), though I'm skeptical it's the right person. Honestly, who would write "I JUST GOT A CALL FROM MY HONEY!!! IT FEELS BETTER THAN FIRST LOVE TO HEAR FROM HER! ♥ " immediately after all this? Then again, maybe he digs the drama in some weird way.
 
2013-03-14 06:37:01 AM  
i21.photobucket.com
 
2013-03-14 06:41:32 AM  

Pick: Why is it that women get so angry when refused sex?


Dunno, but it's worth pausing to think about how radically differently it is perceived socially and culturally when a person gets angry and flips out violently upon being refused sex depending the sex of the person.
And yes, violence by men generally carries more danger with it, but still, the attitude as a whole ought to be condemned, and yet I don't see any kind of reaction at all to the "I own your body and have a right to it" mentality when it comes from a female.
 
2013-03-14 06:46:20 AM  

Lionel Mandrake: Without pics I don't know if this hot or gross.

To fap or not to fap...


rule 34?
 
2013-03-14 06:46:23 AM  

sudo give me more cowbell: JT82: If you happen to troll their FB pages, you'll notice the gap around the time of this story.  And then the message about hearing from his love who is "out of town."  Makes me feel a little better about myself.

Noticed that too (it amazes me that some people will still leave their entire profiles public), though I'm skeptical it's the right person. Honestly, who would write "I JUST GOT A CALL FROM MY HONEY!!! IT FEELS BETTER THAN FIRST LOVE TO HEAR FROM HER! ♥ " immediately after all this? Then again, maybe he digs the drama in some weird way.


Maybe he's planning his move to another state and doesn't want her to get suspicious. Or arranging his own faked death, etc.
 
2013-03-14 06:53:22 AM  
Anyone remember the 900 post "rape" thread from a couple of weeks ago where the feminists had to "educate" everyone on what "rape" is?  According to their definitions this was 89 frickin kinds of rape.

But when it happens to a man, it's simple assault.  Funny how that works.
 
2013-03-14 06:58:37 AM  
Don't stick your dick in crazy, son!

Ya done the right thing!
 
2013-03-14 07:02:45 AM  

sudo give me more cowbell: I don't see any kind of reaction at all to the "I own your body and have a right to it" mentality when it comes from a female.


Because most males WANT (or at least think they want) a woman with a masculine sex drive. They'd understand it. To the male psyche, sex is the third need right after air then water. Food and shelter are things you can do without as long as hot monkey sex is flowin'. If your partner needs sex, that makes total sense.

Women, on the the other hand, don't usually need sex as viscerally or as often. It's a plaything, an amusement, something you can take or leave. At the very least it's prioritized lower than food and probably shelter, too. Women mostly enjoy sex, but they can abstain a lot longer. They don't understand when their partner physically needs it. It doesn't make sense.

Not to mention that it's a lot harder for men to find a willing woman than it is for a woman to find a willing man, so on the rare day that a woman wants sex and her man is unwilling, it's quite possibly the very first time she's been refused, even if she's ahem less attractive than the local average. So you've got the novelty factor coming into play. You can make anyone flip the fark out if you take something away that they've grown used to being plentiful and available.

I mean how long would it take you to pitch a fit if you were really thirsty in a bar and they wouldn't bring you a drink? Ten minutes? Twenty? Probably not much more than that, right? So for this Hutt, she was in the VIP lounge at club le dick and the bartender wouldn't bring her the stiff one she normally got at will. It messed her circuitry all up and viola: insane tantrum.
 
2013-03-14 07:24:32 AM  
So I searched google with that address and noticed a result for a landmark page on Facebook, "Zube's House for Wayward Youth". I saw a status on the page that was liked by a Heather Hayes so I clicked her name and I was greeted with this face....

sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net
 
2013-03-14 07:33:09 AM  
is 'nearly nude' anything like 'never nude'?
www.blogcdn.com
 
2013-03-14 07:35:15 AM  

Tenatra: So I searched google with that address and noticed a result for a landmark page on Facebook, "Zube's House for Wayward Youth". I saw a status on the page that was liked by a Heather Hayes so I clicked her name and I was greeted with this face....

[sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net image 729x729]


i26.photobucket.com
 
2013-03-14 07:35:52 AM  
Oh, but she seems like such a nice, Jewish girl!
 
2013-03-14 07:40:02 AM  

Tenatra: So I searched google with that address and noticed a result for a landmark page on Facebook, "Zube's House for Wayward Youth". I saw a status on the page that was liked by a Heather Hayes so I clicked her name and I was greeted with this face....

[sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net image 729x729]


The plot thickens.
 
2013-03-14 07:43:26 AM  
The plot was already pretty thick.
 
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