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(NBC News) NewsFlash Cardinals hire new manager   (worldnews.nbcnews.com) divider line 1550
    More: NewsFlash, Sistine Chapel, white smoke, rises, Castel Gandolfo, basilica, papal elections, NBC News  
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26339 clicks; posted to Main » on 13 Mar 2013 at 2:13 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»


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2013-03-13 02:37:32 PM

Grand_Moff_Joseph: Edwardo17: durbnpoisn: Good.  Can we just get over this already?

Speaking as a non-Catholic, I find it completely absurd that the news media is portraying this as some sort of gigantic event for all of humanity.  My coffee will still taste the same tomorrow...  In other words, it means less than nothing to me.

Also speaking as a non-Catholic; the fact that you happen to think that it's not a big event says nothing about whether or not is actually is a major event. The Catholic Church is one of the largest, oldest, and most influential organizations in the history of civilization. Period. There are over 1.2 billion Catholics, and over 400,000 priests in the Church - not including the monastic orders, lay orders, and other affiliated organizations. The Pope has a remarkable amount of influence in the doctrinal decisions of the church, and church policy influences state policy in dozens of nations all over the world. The political and theological positions of the next pope will help to shape the church's stance on contraception, abortion, the status of women, and a host of other social and theological issues for the next several decades at least.

You can think it's absurd; you're free to feel that it means nothing to you. But let's be honest; the election of a new pope isa big deal.

Agreed.  The bad news is, the church seems intent on taking all of those issues back to the dark ages.


That's my concern as well; which is why the election of a new pope is so important. Can you imagine if the Church ended up selecting a moderate or even - gasp - a reformer?  What I'd really love to see is a new Vatican Council to address contemporary Church issues - the status of women, contraception, homosexuality and gay rights, the celibacy of priests, etc.
 
2013-03-13 02:37:40 PM
I wonder what his coronation song will be..."Home" WAS really good...
 
2013-03-13 02:37:46 PM
Actually, I think Antonin Scalia would be a great Pope. He's already used to wearing robes.
 
2013-03-13 02:37:46 PM
Actually, Ratzingers firing up the ol crematory for old times sake.
 
2013-03-13 02:37:48 PM
Battle of the papal bands!!
 
2013-03-13 02:37:55 PM

Weaver95: robsul82: Good news - the frontrunner for the Papacy said feminism is the reason for homosexual men.

didn't Rush Limbaugh say that?


Rush Limbaugh is the frontrunner for the Papacy?
 
2013-03-13 02:37:57 PM
The NEW Pope smokes Dope! and uses Soap on a Rope. What a Dope!

In more important news, bags of plastic peanuts have been dumped from a truck on our local interstate.

exhaling white smoke right now
 
2013-03-13 02:38:07 PM
i.imgur.com

Poperah!
 
2013-03-13 02:38:28 PM
What exactly is extraordinary about something that has been done for many hundreds of years?
 
2013-03-13 02:38:28 PM
Oh i see we'll have to wait until after the Battle of the Bands.
 
2013-03-13 02:38:28 PM
FFS, the Beeb says it will be another 20 minutes.
 
2013-03-13 02:38:31 PM

Uchiha_Cycliste: Clintoned in the Boobies...  can I say that in a pope thread?


Say 10 Hail Drews and you will be forgiven, my son.
 
2013-03-13 02:38:36 PM

Edwardo17: That's my concern as well; which is why the election of a new pope is so important. Can you imagine if the Church ended up selecting a moderate or even - gasp - a reformer?  What I'd really love to see is a new Vatican Council to address contemporary Church issues - the status of women, contraception, homosexuality and gay rights, the celibacy of priests, etc.


I'd be surprised if we don't see Vatican III within the next 10-15 years.
 
2013-03-13 02:38:37 PM
christwire.org
/habeo nullum
 
2013-03-13 02:38:38 PM

iheartscotch: Weaver95: Peter the Roman.  that's his name.  Peter the Roman.

or Pieter DeVries.  that would be better.

Yeaaaahhhh, the mind sees what it wants to see.

St. Malachy might have been right; or he might have gotten into the holy hooch. But, I guarantee; the name, Peter the Roman, follows this next pope FOR-EV-ER, FOR-EV-ER, FOR-EV-ER


only if this Pope ends up being the last one and the Church implodes.
 
2013-03-13 02:38:44 PM

Weaver95: August11: What the hell is taking him so long? Put on the gown and get on the balcony! Sheesh.

they had to put the mind control parasite on first.


So, we're going to get a 15 year rein of this pope, he's going to die by the hands of G'kar and Vir will be the next pope?
 
2013-03-13 02:38:45 PM

what_now: Excellent job, Subby.

I have a feeling this is one of those headlines that was thought up in advance, like mine for when Dick Cheney dies.


My prepared comment for that will be an edit of the incredible hulk intro:"the world believes Dick Cheney to be dead, and he must let them think that, until he learns to control the raging spirit within him."
 
2013-03-13 02:38:58 PM
With the effect that the Catholic Church has on so many things - condom use in Africa that could stop a lot of the HIV issues in that part of the world, for example - I think that this is very big news whether or not one is Catholic.
 
2013-03-13 02:39:03 PM
Per NBC, name to be announced in about 10 minutes
 
2013-03-13 02:39:06 PM
I'm sealing the bunker door now. good luck to all.
 
2013-03-13 02:39:09 PM

Lt. Cheese Weasel: [media.riffraf.net image 232x233]
Doesn't seem very Popeish to me.....


What?!? He's doing "Here is the church, here is the steeple", so obviously he understands the rituals and dogma.
 
2013-03-13 02:39:10 PM

Lt. Cheese Weasel: iheartscotch: So, if the pope weighs the same as a duck; he's made of wood?

Who are you who is so wise in the ways of science?


I am Arthur, King of the Britians!
 
2013-03-13 02:39:12 PM

rev. dave: MNguy: rev. dave:   I would prefer someone who would allow women Bishops and Cardinals.  Women would have a better chance at fixing the messes they have gotten into.


Haha.  Oh, wait, are you serious?  Because that is not going to happen.

I'm serious.  It will happen.  Just when is the question.  It is needed.


Catholic dogma holds that it's literally impossible for women to become priests (though deacon is possible), so either bishop or cardinal is Right Out.
 
2013-03-13 02:39:14 PM

ImRonBurgundy: Weaver95: robsul82: Good news - the frontrunner for the Papacy said feminism is the reason for homosexual men.

didn't Rush Limbaugh say that?

Rush Limbaugh is the frontrunner for the Papacy?


well...he's certainly got the ego for it.
 
2013-03-13 02:39:18 PM
sandystrachan.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-03-13 02:39:19 PM
I'm hoping the Queen Spider took the job upon herself.
/If you need something done..
 
2013-03-13 02:39:29 PM
Actually is Pope Dolan?

i48.tinypic.com
 
2013-03-13 02:39:39 PM
I want to thank the Cardinals...all of the Bishops of the world...all of my fellow Catholics...
 
2013-03-13 02:39:39 PM

WiteBuddha: +1 to subby, I had a mini panic attack at first :o

/BIRDS!
//on the smoke stack.


No coffee yet, so here's what went through my head when I checked my email: "A news flash for a baseball manager? Seriously? Wait.... Spring Training has already started, this IS big news!"

*click*

Aw dammit
 
2013-03-13 02:39:41 PM
Are we sure the new Pope isn't just Ronaiah Tuiasosopo?
- Will McAvoy (@WillMcAvoyACN) March 13, 2013
 
2013-03-13 02:39:42 PM
He's getting fitted for his green jacket now.
 
2013-03-13 02:39:45 PM

CapeFearCadaver: Weaver95: robsul82: Good news - the frontrunner for the Papacy said feminism is the reason for homosexual men.

didn't Rush Limbaugh say that?

My grandmother suggested that domestic violence was a direct result of feminism. Like, it didn't even exist until the 60's. What was it she said... Oh: "It's like the emasculation of men through women's rights have made the men more violent in order to prove themselves."


A LOT of American frontier women died from "her petticoats catching fire at the hearth".  Yeah, wool and cotton just explode into flames.

You get old, he lights you up and he finds a new younger woman
 
2013-03-13 02:39:46 PM
"Oh Frank. My father went the same way."
 
2013-03-13 02:40:02 PM
Man, with that much white smoke, those Cardinals are going to have some serious munchies.
 
2013-03-13 02:40:08 PM
www.billyjoel.com
 
2013-03-13 02:40:19 PM

henryhill: What exactly is extraordinary about something that has been done for many hundreds of years?


A lot of things have been done for many hundreds of years.  What's important about any of them?  What's important about anything at all?
 
2013-03-13 02:40:20 PM
I cry fowl.  They haven't even counted the absentee votes yet!  I feel disenfranchised.
 
2013-03-13 02:40:27 PM
Serious question: Why don't they just pick Jesus as Pope? Am I missing something?
 
2013-03-13 02:40:28 PM

Frozboz: The pope has his own marching band?  What is this?


He's a Head of State.  The Vatican is a country.
 
2013-03-13 02:40:30 PM
Gonna need a new movie.  Love the live video.

/cool
 
2013-03-13 02:40:33 PM
The dark horse candidate:

theblacksphere.net
 
2013-03-13 02:40:56 PM

bighairyguy: He's getting fitted for his green jacket now.


Gold jacket, green jacket, who gives a shiat.
 
2013-03-13 02:40:56 PM
surprised NBC isn't showing this on tape delay in primetime with commercials
 
2013-03-13 02:40:58 PM

WinoRhino: Worst. Halftime. Show. Ever.


Of course they go with the "safe acts"...god forbid we accidently see a nipple or too much cleavage...
 
2013-03-13 02:40:59 PM
why does the swiss guard marching around the vatican remind me of this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rjBrkfX_XHw
 
2013-03-13 02:41:00 PM
lh3.ggpht.com
 
2013-03-13 02:41:02 PM

drdank: Actually, Ratzingers firing up the ol crematory for old times sake.


Very nice.
 
2013-03-13 02:41:07 PM
Troll-pe.
 
2013-03-13 02:41:09 PM

MaudlinMutantMollusk: Bathia_Mapes: Endive Wombat: what do they use to make the smoke white?

yes, this is the most important question.

I don't know if things have changed over the years, but traditionally the white smoke was from the ballots being burned by themselves. The black smoke from damp straw added to the stove where the ballots are burned. However, someone told me the other day that nowadays they use some kind of chemical additive to make the black smoke.

I heard yesterday they have two stoves connected to the same stack. They burn the ballots in one and a colorant in the other so the smoke mixes

/sounds like papal bull to me


That's exactly it. They used to do it in the same stove and use wet straw to blacken the smoke, but they switched to chemicals in the 40s, and added the new stove last time around to burn the chemicals separately to make it more clear. There was confusion between the black and white smoke last time around, so they modified the chemical formula for this one.

The stoves get kept in storage and are hooked up for a conclave, they're not normally in the sistine chapel. Hence the jury rigged chimney.
 
2013-03-13 02:41:12 PM

NeoCortex42: digitalrain: As a Catholic, I'm very nervous about our new Pope, whoever he may be. Will he continue on with the status quo or will he really step up do what is needed for the Church. We need someone whose kneejerk reaction ISN'T "hide the skeletons as far back in the closet as humanly possible". I can't think of anything in recent times that has damaged the Church's credibility as much as the issue of child molestation and covering up for those clergy who preyed on the most innocent among their congregation.

People would have a lot more respect for the Church if the powers that be had just stepped up and said "we've uncovered monsters in our midst and are turning him over to the authorities".

If it's a European Pope, I'll be disappointed (but not surprised).  It would most likely mean a traditionalist who won't change much.

A Latin American or African Pope could be very interesting.


Agreed. I don't want a NoAm Pope though. Most of the child molestation coverups occurred over here. I don't
want that kind of complicity sitting on the Pope throne.
 
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