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(Slate)   The time to end email signoffs is now   (slate.com) divider line 106
    More: Unlikely, pony express, Park Slope, Best Wishes  
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8193 clicks; posted to Main » on 13 Mar 2013 at 9:11 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-03-13 09:53:35 AM
One guy I knew used to sign off with "Pax."

/It's Latin, Dah'lin.  He's an educated man.

//Now I know I hate him
 
2013-03-13 09:58:27 AM
"Think about it. Email signoffs are holdovers from a bygone era when letter writing-the kind that required ink and paper-was a major means of communication.  people weren't all impolite, selfish pricks.  And even if they were, they tended not to advertise the fact in their correspondence."

EABOD, YOLO,
Thunderboy
 
2013-03-13 09:58:36 AM

Bartleby the Scrivener: If one is left wondering what one meant by the sign off:

1. the sender has done a very poor job communicating in the body of the text
2. the reader is a hypervigilant neurotic, most likely a chronic self doubter who reads between the lines of the minutiae of basic social interactions as a way of managing his or her existential loneliness and despair.

i'm thinking 2.

respectfully,
BtS


Your observation is spot on Chap.

Respectfully, gratefully, and everlastingly yours,
Jack
 
2013-03-13 09:58:42 AM
delathi:
Whatever happened to the good email signoffs?


I think they died out with BBSs...
 
2013-03-13 10:02:04 AM
I detest the post-name signoff

Thanks for your assistance in this matter,
MotBU

sent from my iPhone
 
2013-03-13 10:10:38 AM
They're called taglines you drooling savage.
 
2013-03-13 10:17:55 AM

swahnhennessy: A far more devious issue is people who use signatures on message boards.


Those are obnoxious. I can see your name at the top of your two line post. I don't need to see it again so sdoon .
 
2013-03-13 10:20:23 AM
Boring corespondent was boring!
 
2013-03-13 10:23:17 AM
The time to stop submitting Slate articles is now. Seriously, enough already!
 
2013-03-13 10:29:58 AM

MyKingdomForYourHorse: MightyPez: It makes me glad I don't have to do that anymore. At my previous employer we were required to keep 5 years of documents (including emails) per DHS, and 7 years of tax information per the IRS. Mailbox quotas were meaningless because people would constantly send messages to everyone in the company with attachments asking "Is this yours???" The gnashing of teeth was epic after the partners let me lock down the dist. groups.

I think I would go full blown alcoholic if we have that length of retention requirement. Thankfully here it's only three years, and we offload them to an archive at another location which gets stored in a SQL server. Then it's the SQL admins problem not mine.

Of course, I still get this on occasion

*phone rings
"Hello?"
"You know, you could at least warn me before you institute a new recipient policy"
"What, huh?"
"Ohh nothing, its just that our archive database just ballooned by 20% is all"
"Ohh shiat...sorry I forgot about that spat of reply alls last June"


Oh man, I could only dream about that. When it came to infrastucture costs that company was supremely cheap (What do you mean we have to PAY to license users to connect to servers???). Backups were delegated to LTO tapes and archives were non-existent. I spent many days off or all nighters trying to recover data and get the Exchange server back up and running after an update blew it up or a drive failed.
 
2013-03-13 10:31:36 AM
The internet has officially run out of things to write about.
 
2013-03-13 10:32:41 AM

Fano: swahnhennessy: A far more devious issue is people who use signatures on message boards.

Those are obnoxious. I can see your name at the top of your two line post. I don't need to see it again so sdoon .


who was that guy that used to do that here?
2horn
3horn
2pac?

something with a number and a word.
 
2013-03-13 10:36:42 AM

MightyPez: Backups were delegated to LTO tapes and archives were non-existent


A tip of the hat to you sir, you have earned those stripes you wear.

LTO?
*shudder
 
2013-03-13 10:37:49 AM
If I see a signoff or a signature block that consists of anything other than newline-dash-dash-space-newline followed by text no larger than 80x4, then that writer can get off my lawn.

/McQuary limit rules all
//except for slashies
///why the trailing space was in the delimiter, I never understood
 
2013-03-13 10:38:36 AM

MyKingdomForYourHorse: MightyPez: Backups were delegated to LTO tapes and archives were non-existent

A tip of the hat to you sir, you have earned those stripes you wear.

LTO?
*shudder


Well you're still in the trenches, so you get a full salute from me.

/Moved on to desktop support for a university
//Small pay cut, better benefits, no on call.
 
2013-03-13 10:38:54 AM

Bartleby the Scrivener: Fano: swahnhennessy: A far more devious issue is people who use signatures on message boards.

Those are obnoxious. I can see your name at the top of your two line post. I don't need to see it again so sdoon .

who was that guy that used to do that here?
2horn
3horn
2pac?

something with a number and a word.


It was 3horn. I remember one day when everyone decided to sign his name to every post they made that day, for the lulz.


/3horn
 
2013-03-13 10:43:43 AM

UberDave: delathi:
Whatever happened to the good email signoffs?

I think they died out with BBSs...


I'm bringin 'em back.

                 (O)
                 <M
     o          <M
    /| ........  /:M\------------------------------------------------,,,,,,
  (O)[]XXXXXX[]I:K+}=====<{H}>================================---------- -->
    \| ^^^^^^  \:W/------------------------------------------------''''''
     o          <W
                 <W
                 (O)
 
2013-03-13 10:43:48 AM

Bartleby the Scrivener: Fano: swahnhennessy: A far more devious issue is people who use signatures on message boards.

Those are obnoxious. I can see your name at the top of your two line post. I don't need to see it again so sdoon .

who was that guy that used to do that here?
2horn
3horn
2pac?

something with a number and a word.


-smidge-
 
2013-03-13 10:49:21 AM
Dear Mr. Matthew J. X. Malady,

Time to end gratuitous use of middle initials.

Regards,

BS
 
2013-03-13 10:53:50 AM
Signoffs are good.  Using a script font to "sign" your emails looks dumb. Including anything other than your name, organization, title and contact info in your signature is bad.
 
2013-03-13 10:53:54 AM
Cheers,
Hagar...
 
2013-03-13 10:56:30 AM

B.Stroganoff: Dear Mr. Matthew J. X. Malady,

Time to end gratuitous use of middle initials.


During my brief stint in academia, it was the rare case to talk to someone that didn't use two middle initials, a hyphenated last name, a generational suffix, and their degree alphabet soup.
 
2013-03-13 10:57:33 AM
Dear Douche (or Douchette)-

You sound like a whiner.

Ut prosim-

Tanukis Parachute
 
2013-03-13 10:59:30 AM
This is how this article came to be - boss tells writer to write an article. Writer can't come up with any ideas. Writer fancies himself a snarky fellow and decides to write about something that bothers him. Can't think of anything. Looks around desk. Pencils are cool, phones are handy, emails are useful... Waitaminute! I got it!
 
2013-03-13 11:03:11 AM
I like using (since I may mistype on a phone or tablet) "sent from my iphone with a compass in the stock and this thing that tells time"
 
2013-03-13 11:04:58 AM
Thanks. Priapic.

Here's to those that wish me well and all the rest can go to hell. Anon.
 
2013-03-13 11:11:05 AM

MyKingdomForYourHorse: If you want something to biatch about with regards to email, I think sign offs are at the lowest of the low for this ranty totem pole. No you want to rail on something how about idiots who use the reply all without actually looking to see who it might actually reply all to. Those people should have their thumbs crushed.

With warm regards


This.
 
2013-03-13 11:14:46 AM

MightyPez: Well you're still in the trenches, so you get a full salute from me.


relativelyrelatives.files.wordpress.com

It's not so bad, we get our rations at least.
 
2013-03-13 11:17:34 AM
I don't mind them.

--Smidge--
 
2013-03-13 11:25:15 AM
Dear Slate Millennial Columnist,

The word you were looking for was "valediction". Though not necessary for daily communication, its use shows respect. If you are not interested in that, please refrain from affixing a valediction to your messages. It seems you were personally uncomfortable with the one you chose to use for everything. The Internet does not know how this is somehow its problem. It would have been far more preferable to read an article about the awful habit of business people and other internet novices that has persisted over the last decade: including a valediction in your signature -- a behavior that is, at best, in poor taste.

Yours etc,

The Internet
 
2013-03-13 11:32:15 AM
The only thing more obnoxious than the histrionic whining in that article was that the author expected me to click a link so I could read a second page of it.

Fano: -smidge-


I remember FlyNavy used to sign off with "Buzzy" before he was outed as a complete fraud and run out of town.
 
2013-03-13 11:38:43 AM

B.Stroganoff: Time to end gratuitous use of middle initials.


Holy crap, I live in the Philippines at the moment, and everyone here uses all 4 or 5 of their names on all official documents.  I try to get away with using just my middle initial, and people insist that I didn't fill out the form properly.

Plus, everyone seems to be named "Princess Cherie Amour Crucifixion Reyes".
 
2013-03-13 11:53:34 AM
I have a simple rule about email sign offs:

if it's business, I put Best, My Name
if it's a long drawn out business discussion (30 emails back and forth), I simply don't sign it
if it's friendly, I put my name
if it's super friend, I put my first initial
 
2013-03-13 11:54:14 AM
I don't know how so much sand got up this guy's vagina, what with his panties already being in such a wad.

For some reason top-posting has become the dominant paradigm of email conversations.  Having a signoff at the end of your newly contributed content is a good way to demarcate where people should stop paying attention.

Thanks,
Poot.
 
2013-03-13 11:58:26 AM

SoupJohnB: One guy I knew used to sign off with "Pax."

/It's Latin, Dah'lin.  He's an educated man.

//Now I know I hate him


1.bp.blogspot.com

careful johnny, i hear he's real fast
 
2013-03-13 12:06:13 PM

aesirx: I have a simple rule about email sign offs:

if it's business, I put Best, My Name
if it's a long drawn out business discussion (30 emails back and forth), I simply don't sign it
if it's friendly, I put my name
if it's super friend, I put my first initial


This.
 
2013-03-13 12:12:24 PM
But EABOD is still ok, right?
 
2013-03-13 12:13:53 PM

Demetrius: The internet has officially run out of things to write about.


Maybe someone can write about that?
 
2013-03-13 12:20:36 PM

MyKingdomForYourHorse: If you want something to biatch about with regards to email, I think sign offs are at the lowest of the low for this ranty totem pole. No you want to rail on something how about idiots who use the reply all without actually looking to see who it might actually reply all to. Those people should have their thumbs crushed.

With warm regards


My husband refers to the "Reply All" button as "Satan's icon" and never uses it. There were many, many times at his previous job where people using Reply All to demand that others stop replying to all for one specific email would bring the server to its knees.
 
2013-03-13 12:37:58 PM
I wonder when the kids will learn about email. Make it the hot new thing.
 
2013-03-13 01:10:21 PM

Bartleby the Scrivener: Fano: swahnhennessy: A far more devious issue is people who use signatures on message boards.

Those are obnoxious. I can see your name at the top of your two line post. I don't need to see it again so sdoon .

who was that guy that used to do that here?
2horn
3horn
2pac?

something with a number and a word.


Smidge still does it, and for some reason I always associate that word with "smirk" so it makes that person's comments very pretentious in my mind, no matter the context...

I hate Smidge.
 
2013-03-13 01:20:56 PM

Girion47: Bartleby the Scrivener: Fano: swahnhennessy: A far more devious issue is people who use signatures on message boards.

Those are obnoxious. I can see your name at the top of your two line post. I don't need to see it again so sdoon .

who was that guy that used to do that here?
2horn
3horn
2pac?

something with a number and a word.

Smidge still does it, and for some reason I always associate that word with "smirk" so it makes that person's comments very pretentious in my mind, no matter the context...

I hate Smidge.


There is someone on RCgroups.com that signs with "smidge."
 
2013-03-13 01:21:25 PM

the_rev: Bartleby the Scrivener: Fano: swahnhennessy: A far more devious issue is people who use signatures on message boards.

Those are obnoxious. I can see your name at the top of your two line post. I don't need to see it again so sdoon .

who was that guy that used to do that here?
2horn
3horn
2pac?

something with a number and a word.

It was 3horn. I remember one day when everyone decided to sign his name to every post they made that day, for the lulz.


/3horn


seriously scrolled down this whole thing looking for a 3horn.

Not disappointed.
-tb
 
2013-03-13 01:47:02 PM
A few days ago, I emailed this piece to my editor as an attachment. It felt good to write the corresponding message: "Here's the piece on how email signoffs are the worst and why we should get rid of them for good. I hope you like it." There was nothing more. No "Hello," no "Take care," or "Best," or, heaven forbid, "My very best." A few hours later, I received the following response: "Looks good. I think you're onto something here. More soon." And, for that moment at least, all was right with the world.


I have a feeling his article got published, because his editor wanted to publicly embarrass him for getting outraged over something so minor and stupid. I mean, most of the emails I get at work, have just pre-formated signoffs that auto-generate after you type up the email. Do I get upset over them? Uh, no. Never have, never will, it's not something to even get upset over, it's such a non-issue.
 
2013-03-13 01:48:48 PM
I use Thanks on all my internal emails and Best Regards on all my external emails.

Unless somebody really pisses me off and then I use Regards.

I am sick of those 'Be green and don't print this email!' things. Once someone at our company had one of those on their signature and sent it to a papermill- the papermill guy immediately called him and chewed him out about how trees are grown for paper and his company isn't logging in the rainforest and they plant more trees than they cut down, etc. etc.
 
2013-03-13 02:25:47 PM
The only signoff that truly annoys me is "Thanks in advance." The writer of the article and anyone using that signoff should get two blowjobs and bring me back one.

Dictated but not read,
MikeBoomshadow
 
2013-03-13 03:32:57 PM
....................../´¯/)
....................,/¯../
.................../..../
............./´¯/'...'/´¯¯`·¸
........../'/.../..../......./¨¯\
........('(...´...´.... ¯~/'...')
.........\.................'...../
..........''...\.......... _.·´
............\..............(
..............\.............\...
 
2013-03-13 03:40:30 PM
Dear Matt:

How about No and Fark off?!

Best,

jpo
 
2013-03-13 04:42:27 PM
I eschew formal greeting and closing lines in e-mail. My e-mail messages end with a signature which adheres to Usenet standards.

Usenet standards specify that a signature block should be displayed as plain text in a fixed-width font (no HTML, images, or other rich text), and should be delimited from the body of the message by a single line consisting of exactly two hyphens, followed by a space, followed by the end of line (i.e., "-- \n").[1] This latter prescription, which goes by many names, including "sig dashes", "signature cut line", "sig-marker", "sig separator" and "signature delimiter", allows software to automatically mark or remove the sig block as the receiver desires. The signature prefix chosen can be different for different people serving as a distinguishing feature of their signatures. A correct delimiter is required for a news posting program to receive the Good Netkeeping Seal of Approval. It is also recommended that a signature block should contain no more than four lines of less than eighty columns each; this keeps the overall size of the message down, conserving bandwidth as well as the time required to read the message, and ensures that eighty-column terminals can display the sig block properly. (from http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Signature_block#E-mail_and_Usenet)
 
2013-03-13 05:37:57 PM

curmudg3on: I eschew formal greeting and closing lines in e-mail. My e-mail messages end with a signature which adheres to Usenet standards.

Usenet standards specify that a signature block should be displayed as plain text in a fixed-width font (no HTML, images, or other rich text), and should be delimited from the body of the message by a single line consisting of exactly two hyphens, followed by a space, followed by the end of line (i.e., "-- \n").[1] This latter prescription, which goes by many names, including "sig dashes", "signature cut line", "sig-marker", "sig separator" and "signature delimiter", allows software to automatically mark or remove the sig block as the receiver desires. The signature prefix chosen can be different for different people serving as a distinguishing feature of their signatures. A correct delimiter is required for a news posting program to receive the Good Netkeeping Seal of Approval. It is also recommended that a signature block should contain no more than four lines of less than eighty columns each; this keeps the overall size of the message down, conserving bandwidth as well as the time required to read the message, and ensures that eighty-column terminals can display the sig block properly. (from http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Signature_block#E-mail_and_Usenet)




I delete the email and flag as spam when someone uses the word, "eschew."
 
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