FARK.com: (7641034) How many screw drivers in the head does it take to incapacitate a Pollock? Just one. What are you, racist?

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		How many screw drivers in the head does it take to incapacitate a Pollock? Just one. What are you, racist? (sentinel-standard.com)		41
		More: Scary, screwdrivers

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3990 clicks; posted to Main » on 13 Mar 2013 at 10:03 AM | Favorite | share:

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sgnilward		2013-03-13 08:39:03 AM

Sounds fishy to me

MaudlinMutantMollusk		2013-03-13 08:44:27 AM

Straight or Phillips?

Sybarite		2013-03-13 08:44:51 AM

Heard to say "Get that damn screwdriver out of my head!"

DjangoStonereaver		2013-03-13 09:08:36 AM

"There is an old Polish proverb that says: don't get a screwdriver stuck in your head."

DammitIForgotMyLogin		2013-03-13 09:14:52 AM

Ctrl-Alt-Del		2013-03-13 10:06:32 AM

"Hey guys, what's going on in this thread?"

Gordon Bennett		2013-03-13 10:07:01 AM

DammitIForgotMyLogin: [upload.wikimedia.org image 280x570]

DammitIWasGoingToPostThat.

Slaves2Darkness		2013-03-13 10:10:10 AM

One? Dam he must be a lightweight, I usually have to drink five or six before I'm incapacitated.

Makh		2013-03-13 10:17:11 AM

Dude, just buy the fish bites, it's cheaper.

Pants full of macaroni!!		2013-03-13 10:21:57 AM

DammitIForgotMyLogin: [upload.wikimedia.org image 280x570]

Came here for that. Kudos good sir.

imbrial		2013-03-13 10:23:03 AM

So, did you screwdrive that Pollock?

Yeah. So?

What are you, a gay fish or something?

i.imgur.com

Devolving_Spud		2013-03-13 10:26:11 AM

ferretman		2013-03-13 10:29:05 AM

Q: Why do Pollacks have holes in their foreheads?

A: From learning to eat with a fork.

tnpir		2013-03-13 10:34:57 AM

Of COURSE it's just one. I mean, that's all you need to build a helicopter ejector seat or a submarine screen door.

Crewmannumber6		2013-03-13 10:40:14 AM

Was it a left handed screwdriver?

GungFu		2013-03-13 10:42:37 AM

DammitIForgotMyLogin: [upload.wikimedia.org image 280x570]

i45.tinypic.com

FTFY!

GungFu		2013-03-13 10:45:24 AM

http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/4832172/Man-skewers-head-during- D IY-venture.html

With blurred photos of what a screwdriver stuck in a pole looks like.

booger42		2013-03-13 10:46:12 AM

MaudlinMutantMollusk: Straight or Phillips?

Robertson FTW

Bung_Howdy		2013-03-13 10:48:06 AM

Fishy McBites, McBites... Fishy McBites, McBites.. Fishy Fishy!

cdn.uproxx.com

make it stop...

monoski		2013-03-13 10:59:29 AM

So will we be banning screwdrivers now or require background checks for them?
//You know millions of people are killed with hammers

maddogdelta		2013-03-13 11:00:52 AM

GungFu: i45.tinypic.com

That's upside down...

maddogdelta		2013-03-13 11:01:55 AM

TFA The screwdriver did not damage the man's eyes or brain.

Oh, the jokes one could make from this....

fickenchucker		2013-03-13 11:14:58 AM

First thing I thought was "why are Eastern Europeans stabbing fish in the head"?

Classic joke Wisconsinites tell:

Did you hear about the new game fish the Illinois Department of Natural Resources is trying to breed? They took a Coho and crossed it with a Walleye. They called it a Kowal. It had great taste, and fought like hell, but wasn't very large. So they crossed it with a Muskie, and called it a Kowalski. It has the best of everything: it fights hard, it tastes great, and it grows up to 50 inches. The only problem is they're having trouble teaching to swim!

GlobalStrategic MapleSyrup Reserve		2013-03-13 11:28:20 AM

"Well, I heard they sent a rocket to the sun once... at night. And there was that submarine, with the screen doors..."

Ctrl-Alt-Del		2013-03-13 11:28:21 AM

fickenchucker: Classic joke Wisconsinites tell:

Did you hear about the new game fish the Illinois Department of Natural Resources is trying to breed? They took a Coho and crossed it with a Walleye. They called it a Kowal. It had great taste, and fought like hell, but wasn't very large. So they crossed it with a Muskie, and called it a Kowalski. It has the best of everything: it fights hard, it tastes great, and it grows up to 50 inches. The only problem is they're having trouble teaching to swim!

Ah, Wisconsin... walking that fine line on the cutting edge of humor since Ralph told Potzie to "Sit on it"

jigger		2013-03-13 11:36:54 AM

In other news, Polish is a race now.

mdbuff12		2013-03-13 11:40:21 AM

Pray for Jackson.

fickenchucker		2013-03-13 11:48:22 AM

Ctrl-Alt-Del: fickenchucker: Classic joke Wisconsinites tell:

Did you hear about the new game fish the Illinois Department of Natural Resources is trying to breed? They took a Coho and crossed it with a Walleye. They called it a Kowal. It had great taste, and fought like hell, but wasn't very large. So they crossed it with a Muskie, and called it a Kowalski. It has the best of everything: it fights hard, it tastes great, and it grows up to 50 inches. The only problem is they're having trouble teaching to swim!

Ah, Wisconsin... walking that fine line on the cutting edge of humor since Ralph told Potzie to "Sit on it"

I said "classic" in the sense of an old one from my 1970s childhood--the same era as Happy Days, so what's your lame point?

Seriously--who even tells Polack jokes in real life anymore?

/douche

Arthurgoboom		2013-03-13 12:02:30 PM

You guys missed the point. It only takes one screwdriver to incapacitate a pollock, but it takes 4 pollocks to drive a screw.

sten		2013-03-13 12:50:43 PM

Polak?

ObscureNameHere		2013-03-13 01:06:55 PM

Don't suppose this could become a thread about Pole dancing?

offmymeds		2013-03-13 01:07:18 PM

As someone of Polish ancestry, I'm getting a real kick out of this thread. :)

Ctrl-Alt-Del		2013-03-13 01:26:29 PM

offmymeds: As someone of Polish ancestry, I'm getting a real kick out of this thread. :)

I guess you had someone explain the jokes to you?

/I keed, I keed

Cybernetic		2013-03-13 01:33:43 PM

sgnilward: Sounds fishy to me

Really, this thread was done in one.

But I should also mention that the 1/4 of me that is Polish was thoroughly offended by this headline. The other 3/4 thought it was hilarious.

Cybernetic		2013-03-13 01:34:55 PM

ObscureNameHere: Don't suppose this could become a thread about Pole dancing?

What Pole dancing might look like:

sytereitz.com

bratface		2013-03-13 03:11:19 PM

I preferred the original headline.

lack of warmth		2013-03-13 07:28:07 PM

MaudlinMutantMollusk: Straight or Phillips?

Nut driver. Of course he had to do it the hard way.

careet		2013-03-13 07:41:34 PM

Jackson Pollock? http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jackson_Pollack ?

I think OP wants "polak"

Bmorrison		2013-03-13 08:34:51 PM

came for the fish references, leaving satisfied

Eravior		2013-03-14 12:50:46 AM

Sounds to me like he had a screw loose.

dbrunker		2013-03-14 04:37:12 PM

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