My holiday bonus was a "temporary layoff".

For those of you not in the know: a "temporary layoff" means that the employer does NOT have to pay severance + vacation pay for up to 13 weeks after the layoff date. What's more, if I find another job during the 13 weeks, they consider that "quitting my job" and therefore won't pay my severance.

What jackasses.

I got nada, along with everyone else in the lower and middle ranks. My boss, however, got $250,000 for "meeting her goals".

smerfnablin
The last bonus I got (1990), was the same as your deal, minus the expired turkey coupon.

After the Silicon Valley implosion and 18 months of unemployment, I'm lucky to have a job that pays what I earned in 1997. Sorry for rambling...

/NOT bitter, not bitter at all

Posting again for voting goodness... mods, please delete my last post :P
--------
My holiday bonus was a "temporary layoff".

For those of you not in the know: a "temporary layoff" means that the employer does NOT have to pay severance + vacation pay for up to 13 weeks after the layoff date. What's more, if I find another job during the 13 weeks, they consider that "quitting my job" and therefore won't pay my severance.

What jackasses.

Christmas bonus? Working in Japan. Not only is there no holiday bonus, but yours truly will be working on Christmas Eve, Christmas Day, day after Christmas. First time posting, LONG time reader.

Peace.

I got a Christmas card with a CANDY-CANE attached!

My co-worker won an answering machine.

Last year, $50 gift certificate to Outback Steakhouse, this year $30 gift certificate to Applebees. Next year, probably $10 book of gift certificates to McDonalds before it's finally phased out in 2005.

My Xmas Bonus... work (regular hourly pay) 9pm December 24th to 6am December 25th. Oh yeah, that's outside, and with the risk of getting doused in jet fuel. Whee!

I work for a hot cocoa sampler box distributor and we sold a ton of the things to consulting firms this year, yet I didn't get any x-mas bonus whatsoever.

So I took a dump in each and every one of them.


/mods please kill earlier post - thanky/

A one year membership to the Jelly of the Month Club!

/oh Clark!

The last bonus I got was from Enron, which was for 2000 but not paid until February 2001. It was 2% of my salary after taxes. I haven't gotten one since.

Remember the Alamo, and God Bless Texas...

I actually got a nice bonus even though I've only worked for my employer for 3 months.

(ducking hail of rotten fruit and stolen office supplies)

However, last year a friend got a letter from the company she worked for that said, "Congratulations! You've been awarded a merit bonus of $0!" Evidently, some asshat forgot to remove her letter from the pile of bonus announcements.

I got a years membership to the Jelly of the Month Club

Well I have to start by saying that I am happy that I have a job. Anyone who is out there looking for one, I sympathize with you.

My Christmas bonus was having the 26th off as a holiday. (I'll take it, no complaints). However included with that is Herr Rumsfeld's restructuring plan to Govt. workers pay plan which will remove OT pay and union protections.

Therefore, for that day, I'll probably take a $30k a year pay cut from now on. Pretty steep price for an extra day off w/pay.

I work for myself.
No asshat boss, no time clock, no real office to speak of.
No real money, but no outstanding bills either.
I think I already have my bonus.

Merry Christmas /whatever .....

I got a prime rib and shrimp catered dinner and a frozen Butterball turkey to take home. They feed us well in the corrugated paper industry.

/I got nothin

/Seriously

My employer sent me to iraq for xmas.
bonus? whats that?

We get profit sharing, which is like 17 cents for every hour we worked this year. And I always get the shaft because I miss like 20 days a year... oh wait, thats my fault huh.. yep. I have a friend though who worked for a computer place (he was just a builder) and he had been there 6 months and his paycheck was usually right around 500.00 or so for 2 weeks and the day came to get his check and he looks at it and says wow! 500.00 even thats weird. they said. no dear thats your christmas bonus, your paycheck is 545.00 he was blown away!

bonus? ha. i am scheduled to work from 7pm - 1am on Christmas Eve. i was originally scheduled from 6pm - 1am on Christmas day, but now it's from 4:30pm - 1am. i key mail for the post office. what mail will there be???

Merry Effing Christmas!

Ummm... my boss rented a bus, bought a bunch of beer, and got the dance team from the local hockey franchise to ride with us to an out of town game.

Not as good as money, but hey, I got to drink beer and look at cheerleaders all day.

Swift kick in the nuts with a frozen boot

I'm new at the company, so I don't qualify for a bonus (understandable, and not complaining). I did, however, get to attend the Christmas party, which was pretty swanky.

Fsck, I'm just happy to have a job that doesn't suck ass. Bonus enough for me this year.

I got a bottle of Sola Nero. It retails at about $10 Canadian. I work at said liquor store.

No bonus for the tech support agents, but the asshat operations manager who lost the contract i was on previously got a 10% bonus, because HR believes in not assigning blame (while a guy *just* got fired for being late once)....mmm, c0n***gys is the land of the fair.

/rant
/bitterness

Also no boose at the non-existant c0n***gys xmas/holiday party :)

'tis the season

I got 2 weeks off with pay that didn't cut into my vacation time. Of course I worked like a farking slave beforehand so I won't come back to a huge amount of catchup work.

I work for a charity so time off works great for me. I wouldn't expect a bonus.

Got nothing, nothing nothing nothing and more nothing.

Pissy thing is the hospital I work for made 29.5 million in net profit last year.

Really pissy thing, they increased the base pay for clinical staff, but for administrative staff (me) they sent out this memo.

Due to the economy we will no longer be offering a top pay raise of 6% to your department, we are lowering it to 5%. fark you very much. - Management.

Now my wife got $400 and a nice dinner at a swanky place I was able to attend with her. Pretty damn sweet, goes to show you that working for a small business is sometimes so much better than a big farking heartless corporation.

I got 15k ...and a shizzy pen. 4 weeks ago I got a 10k quarterly dividend bonus on my shares of the company.


WTF is with the pen?

you guys need better jobs/employers

One of our co-workers got fired four days short of his one year anniversary. Right after the Department Christmas Party.

What's even worse is that we work for the government, and I work with at least one person who consistently sleeps at her desk. However, since she's been there so long, they can't do anything about her. Your tax dollars at work, people.

And yes, I'm pissed off about it as well.

Kinkos employess found out that our profit sharing plan was getting cut well over 50%. This following a year of profit for the corp. that has not been achieved in several years.

i got a form letter chrismas card combo that said happy holidays from "the Management" and all the managers names
this apparently was supposed to make us not notice the extra hours they pinned on any one who is in school. because there was a sign that said all employees who attend school you scheldules have been adjusted to compensate for the fact that you can now work more often (almost to the letter my memory is shiat though)
Merry Festivius

a good rule of thumb will always be "expect nothing"



a relative started working at sprawl-mart this year,
said you have to be working there for five years before xmas bonuses are even thought about ... 5 years...

The top 75 People in Canada got $200, The next 100 got $100... which meant 35 people in my call centre got stuff. My g/f got $200, but yeah.

My boss told me I get to come in to work while the other 175 some employee's get 2 weeks off for holidays... I work full time and go to school full time. Got a nice 21 hour/week semester starting January.

I thought I'd received the perfect gift this year, a hot cocoa sampler box to keep me warm on a cold winter night; but when I opened it to make a cup, all I found was a turd and some dude's skull.

Weird.

I got a crappy calendar of Nevada... in a white envelope with my name typed on it.

Swell. Bust my butt and I get pictures from the desert.

That's state work for you.

the turnd is mine, i dont know who's skull it is though.

I work for the Post Office. They just put a big tub of candy in the lunch room and said, "Happy Holidays, dig in!"

/no joke

I got a $1 scratch off lottery ticket.

What a job.

$25.00 is the standard Christmas bonus around here. We are a small company with approximately 125 employees. Believe it or not people, bonus's are a burden on small companies as are the paid time off. It adds up quickly.

The $8100.00 check I got this week was a bonus/sales commission for November sales for me, but that is something I earned.

... I got a rock.

I got laid off on the 8th.
:(

Our Co. went to a spiffy restaurant (the reservation for 22 ppl cost approx 2400$) got paid holiday for Thxgiving, will get paid for X-mas, dunno about bonus but at the party we got all the booze we could handle, nummie prime rib (others had pasta or salmon), and we did secret santa. I've only been with the Co. for 3 months, Half paid benifits at the end of the month, plus a dolla raise, full paid benifits after a year and what do I do for a living? Sit on my @$$, answer phones and (dynamite)monkey around on the internet.

-Former Floundering Fortuneless Fast Food Flinger Fumbling Frustrateldy From Friday to Friday.

P.S. Life CAN get better just dont give up.

It is amazing how much employers want out of us and how little they really give back anymore, less and less it seems....
well, as long as you all put up with it, it is ok I guess.

What a low level of expectation in relation to our human capital.

HA!