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(Ahram Online)   Good news: Saudi Arabia may stop beheading people. Not so much: Because there's a shortage of swordsmen   (english.ahram.org.eg) divider line 32
    More: Fail, Saudi Arabia, riyadh, Sri Lankan, death penalty  
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5362 clicks; posted to Main » on 11 Mar 2013 at 10:02 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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Archived thread
2013-03-11 08:38:44 PM
7 votes:
These 8th century goat herders that won the oil lotto need to be beheaded. Live by the sword and die by the sword. I'll rejoice the day the House of Saud is consigned to the history books.
2013-03-11 10:43:50 PM
3 votes:

Generation_D: These 8th century goat herders that won the oil lotto need to be beheaded. Live by the sword and die by the sword. I'll rejoice the day the House of Saud is consigned to the history books.


"a hundred years ago you were living in tents out here in the desert chopping each other's heads off and that's where you'll be in another hundred years"
2013-03-11 10:37:54 PM
2 votes:
I guess I'll scrap my plans of waging war on god with sorcery while I visit.
2013-03-11 10:13:40 PM
2 votes:

AirForceVet: What are the retirement benefits for swordsmen?

/Hey, I might lose my job due to sequestration.


There's a great severance package...
2013-03-11 10:09:33 PM
2 votes:
encrypted-tbn1.gstatic.com

They will always lose.
2013-03-11 10:04:54 PM
2 votes:

Generation_D: These 8th century goat herders that won the oil lotto need to be beheaded. Live by the sword and die by the sword. I'll rejoice the day the House of Saud is consigned to the history books.


Wait until you meet their replacements.
2013-03-11 10:04:41 PM
2 votes:

Generation_D: I'll rejoice the day the House of Saud is consigned to the history books.


So will most of the world, including most of the world's Muslims. Saudi Arabia.....treats objects like women, man.

Seriously, when Muslims worldwide go on Hajj, the Saudis issue them a special visa that says: you can briefly get into Mecca (and Medina if you want), do your few days and GTFO. And don't let them catch you going elsewhere or you're farked.
2013-03-12 09:27:00 AM
1 votes:

thorthor: WTF? Give up you escalades and hummers you soccer moms!
But, but I have two young kids and I need the 2400 sq. Ft of luggage space. Besides it make my vajayjay tingle when I step on the gas pedal. Oooooooh!


I had a co-worker screeching hen tell me once, "I like how high my SUV is so I can look down on everyone else". I told her she had some serious issues for which she needs to see a therapist before she becomes a danger to herself and others. She gave me a vacant stare and never spoke to me again. So that's all it took?
2013-03-12 01:26:26 AM
1 votes:
And still we buy their oil. And still we buy their oil. And still we buy their oil. And still we buy their oil. And still we buy their oil.

WTF? Give up you escalades and hummers you soccer moms!
But, but I have two young kids and I need the 2400 sq. Ft of luggage space. Besides it make my vajayjay tingle when I step on the gas pedal. Oooooooh!
2013-03-12 01:00:25 AM
1 votes:
Came for professional headsman's advice by Severian and pictures of Terminus Est.  Leaving disappointed.

/if you're going to own an executioner's sword,
//make it one with a liquid mercury core and etched writing down
//the blade, reading this is the line of division
2013-03-12 12:58:11 AM
1 votes:

pion: JesusJuice: readbot42: I am curious what the "herp-derp" crowd thinks. On the one hand, they hate Mooslims, but love cheap gas and the death-penalty. Hmmm. A case study in cognitive dissonance perhaps?

I'm against the death penalty on the grounds that a penalty which is 100% irreversible should not be imposed when the legal system is not 100% accurate.  I think gas should be significantly more expensive than it is, necessity is the mother of invention and we need alternative fuels.  I voted for Obama, support gay rights, support unions, and advocate banning private ownership of firearms.

I also hate Muslims.  Not Arabs, Muslims.  It's a savage and disgusting cult of death and violence.  Their revered prophet is a slave-trading pedophile warlord, and they sincerely love him.  Don't let the cultural relativist Muslim apologists fool you, Islam is an enemy to everyone who values freedom, liberalism, and the ideals of western Enlightenment.  We have nothing to learn from Islam and everything to gain by eradicating it, at least in it's current form.

As someone who also opposes the death penalty and private gun ownership and supports renewable fuels, Obama, gay rights, unions, and feminism, and who has had the pleasure of knowing several Muslim friends over the years, I can say, you're a farking douchebag asshole moron.


who happens to be correct.
2013-03-12 12:55:33 AM
1 votes:
And still we buy their oil.  Their religious zealots murder thousands in New York and still we buy their oil.  Their religious figures travel to America to spread hate and incite division and still we buy their oil.

BUT

Hugo Chavez was a monster.  I can't find one instance of a Venezuelan extremist coming to bomb America or murder Americans but Hugo was a monster.  I have never seen a flag draped coffin come back from Venezuela but Hugo was a monster.

it's either willful ignorance or self interest or believing the lies of tainted journalism but it doesn't really matter anymore because Hugo the monster is dead and we'll still buy Saudi oil.
2013-03-12 12:52:31 AM
1 votes:

JesusJuice: readbot42: I am curious what the "herp-derp" crowd thinks. On the one hand, they hate Mooslims, but love cheap gas and the death-penalty. Hmmm. A case study in cognitive dissonance perhaps?

I'm against the death penalty on the grounds that a penalty which is 100% irreversible should not be imposed when the legal system is not 100% accurate. I think gas should be significantly more expensive than it is, necessity is the mother of invention and we need alternative fuels. I voted for Obama, support gay rights, support unions, and advocate banning private ownership of firearms.

I also hate Muslims. Not Arabs, Muslims. It's a savage and disgusting cult of death and violence. Their revered prophet is a slave-trading pedophile warlord, and they sincerely love him. Don't let the cultural relativist Muslim apologists fool you, Islam is an enemy to everyone who values freedom, liberalism, and the ideals of western Enlightenment. We have nothing to learn from Islam and everything to gain by eradicating it, at least in it's current form.


It's amazing how "liberals" who supposedly value freedom and tolerance can get away with saying shiat like this.
2013-03-12 12:23:37 AM
1 votes:

JesusJuice: readbot42: I am curious what the "herp-derp" crowd thinks. On the one hand, they hate Mooslims, but love cheap gas and the death-penalty. Hmmm. A case study in cognitive dissonance perhaps?

I'm against the death penalty on the grounds that a penalty which is 100% irreversible should not be imposed when the legal system is not 100% accurate.  I think gas should be significantly more expensive than it is, necessity is the mother of invention and we need alternative fuels.  I voted for Obama, support gay rights, support unions, and advocate banning private ownership of firearms.

I also hate Muslims.  Not Arabs, Muslims.  It's a savage and disgusting cult of death and violence.  Their revered prophet is a slave-trading pedophile warlord, and they sincerely love him.  Don't let the cultural relativist Muslim apologists fool you, Islam is an enemy to everyone who values freedom, liberalism, and the ideals of western Enlightenment.  We have nothing to learn from Islam and everything to gain by eradicating it, at least in it's current form.


As someone who also opposes the death penalty and private gun ownership and supports renewable fuels, Obama, gay rights, unions, and feminism, and who has had the pleasure of knowing several Muslim friends over the years, I can say, you're a farking douchebag asshole moron.
2013-03-12 12:21:02 AM
1 votes:

JesusJuice: readbot42: I am curious what the "herp-derp" crowd thinks. On the one hand, they hate Mooslims, but love cheap gas and the death-penalty. Hmmm. A case study in cognitive dissonance perhaps?

I'm against the death penalty on the grounds that a penalty which is 100% irreversible should not be imposed when the legal system is not 100% accurate.  I think gas should be significantly more expensive than it is, necessity is the mother of invention and we need alternative fuels.  I voted for Obama, support gay rights, support unions, and advocate banning private ownership of firearms.

I also hate Muslims.  Not Arabs, Muslims.  It's a savage and disgusting cult of death and violence.  Their revered prophet is a slave-trading pedophile warlord, and they sincerely love him.  Don't let the cultural relativist Muslim apologists fool you, Islam is an enemy to everyone who values freedom, liberalism, and the ideals of western Enlightenment.  We have nothing to learn from Islam and everything to gain by eradicating it, at least in it's current form.



Meh.

All of the Abrahamic religions are similarly farked.

But it was all the result of a simple mistake, really.

G-d said "CIRCUMCIZE" when (s)he really meant "CASTRATE".

/Just think of the HUGE difference a simple misinterpretation can make
2013-03-12 12:01:27 AM
1 votes:
No Eddard Stark admonishing the Saud family that the man who passes the sentence should be man enough to swing the sword?

I am disappoint
2013-03-11 11:28:56 PM
1 votes:

ciberido: If you want to decapitate, and for some reason you don't want to use a guillotine, the khukuri is the best tool for the job.


You take your little Himalayan training falx and you get the hell off my lawn, kiddo.
2013-03-11 11:25:59 PM
1 votes:

doglover: eyeq360: Beheading people by sword in one blow is pretty hard to do.  It takes a lot of talent.

Depends on the sword.

A nice German longsword would do it easy.


www.arhandicraftnepal.com
If you want to decapitate, and for some reason you don't want to use a guillotine, the khukuri is the best tool for the job.
2013-03-11 10:56:22 PM
1 votes:
But what do you need a financial advisor for? Twenty years ago you had the highest Gross National Product in the world, now you're tied with Albania. Your second largest export is secondhand goods, closely followed by dates which you're losing five cents a pound on... You know what the business community thinks of you? They think that a hundred years ago you were living in tents out here in the desert chopping each other's heads off and that's where you'll be in another hundred years, so, yes, on behalf of my firm I accept your money.
2013-03-11 10:49:18 PM
1 votes:

doglover: Waging war on God


Isn't it blasphemous to assume that God is so weak that you have to fight His wars for Him?
2013-03-11 10:34:21 PM
1 votes:

Millennium: This leads me to wonder: how many swordsmen do they actually need to fit current trends?


Yeah, seems like one would be enough for the entire country.  TFA said there were 76 beheadings all last year.

Do two a week for 38 weeks and kick it for the next 14.

It's a teacher-like workload.
2013-03-11 10:28:08 PM
1 votes:
too stupid to build a guillotine
2013-03-11 10:22:14 PM
1 votes:
Saudi law allows the death penalty for many crimes. For example:

Adultery (Unmarried adulterers can be sentenced to 100 lashes, married ones can be sentenced to stoning.)
Apostasy (Apostates are sentenced to beheading but are usually given three days to repent and return to Islam.)
Armed robbery
Blasphemy
Carjacking
Drug smuggling
Fornication
Home invasion
Homosexuality (If a person is sodomized by his or her own consent, then he/she might also be sentenced to death)
Idolatry
Murder
Prostitution
Rape
Sedition
Sexual misconduct
Sorcery
Terrorism
Theft (fourth conviction)
Treason
Waging war on God
Witchcraft

I don't care how good the cous cous is, I ain't goin' there.
2013-03-11 10:20:15 PM
1 votes:
Yea I watched the Saudis behead two towers in New York a decade or so back. I think it created many American jobs too, as per the Cheney initiative.

/Beheading is still better than the Christian's version of burning people at the stake.
//But the christians did it because people of science are icky grossy and all that and must be killed to purify the stupids.
2013-03-11 10:14:49 PM
1 votes:

Ambivalence: hardinparamedic: Generation_D: These 8th century goat herders that won the oil lotto need to be beheaded. Live by the sword and die by the sword. I'll rejoice the day the House of Saud is consigned to the history books.

It's not like it's a medieval beheading anyway. They draw off so much blood and dope them up so much they literally have to drag them to the block to begin with. They're literally in decompensated shock when the sword falls down.

If you ever watch any of the videos of them doing it, there's a reason you don't see fountains of blood.

Ummmm...why are you watching videos of people getting beheaded in Saudi Arabia?


Because that's where they behead people. If they did it in France, he'd be watching videos of Frenchmen being beheaded. Duh.
2013-03-11 10:13:28 PM
1 votes:
www.wearysloth.com
2013-03-11 10:12:49 PM
1 votes:
The former incumbent:
2.bp.blogspot.com
2013-03-11 10:05:51 PM
1 votes:
Job security!

media.screened.com
2013-03-11 10:00:42 PM
1 votes:

Generation_D: These 8th century goat herders that won the oil lotto need to be beheaded.


i.imgur.com

They've already started delaying mass crucifixions. What the fark more do you want?
2013-03-11 09:55:10 PM
1 votes:
1.bp.blogspot.com

When you hire the right guy for the job, you know there can be only one.

/This better turn into a Highlander thread pretty goddamn quick or you're all turning in your Fark cards.
2013-03-11 09:26:49 PM
1 votes:

eyeq360: Beheading people by sword in one blow is pretty hard to do.  It takes a lot of talent.


Yep.  The talented ones are a cut above.
2013-03-11 09:11:36 PM
1 votes:

Generation_D: These 8th century goat herders that won the oil lotto need to be beheaded. Live by the sword and die by the sword. I'll rejoice the day the House of Saud is consigned to the history books.


It's not like it's a medieval beheading anyway. They draw off so much blood and dope them up so much they literally have to drag them to the block to begin with. They're literally in decompensated shock when the sword falls down.

If you ever watch any of the videos of them doing it, there's a reason you don't see fountains of blood.
 
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