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(Ahram Online)   Good news: Saudi Arabia may stop beheading people. Not so much: Because there's a shortage of swordsmen   (english.ahram.org.eg) divider line 162
    More: Fail, Saudi Arabia, riyadh, Sri Lankan, death penalty  
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5367 clicks; posted to Main » on 11 Mar 2013 at 10:02 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-03-11 08:38:44 PM  
These 8th century goat herders that won the oil lotto need to be beheaded. Live by the sword and die by the sword. I'll rejoice the day the House of Saud is consigned to the history books.
 
2013-03-11 08:52:37 PM  
What are the retirement benefits for swordsmen?

/Hey, I might lose my job due to sequestration.
 
2013-03-11 08:56:10 PM  

AirForceVet: What are the retirement benefits for swordsmen?


What do you think?

*lop*
 
2013-03-11 09:02:43 PM  
Beheading people by sword in one blow is pretty hard to do.  It takes a lot of talent.
 
2013-03-11 09:06:22 PM  
And the training/practice sessions ain't that pretty at all.
 
2013-03-11 09:11:36 PM  

Generation_D: These 8th century goat herders that won the oil lotto need to be beheaded. Live by the sword and die by the sword. I'll rejoice the day the House of Saud is consigned to the history books.


It's not like it's a medieval beheading anyway. They draw off so much blood and dope them up so much they literally have to drag them to the block to begin with. They're literally in decompensated shock when the sword falls down.

If you ever watch any of the videos of them doing it, there's a reason you don't see fountains of blood.
 
2013-03-11 09:26:49 PM  

eyeq360: Beheading people by sword in one blow is pretty hard to do.  It takes a lot of talent.


Yep.  The talented ones are a cut above.
 
2013-03-11 09:31:48 PM  

hardinparamedic: Generation_D: These 8th century goat herders that won the oil lotto need to be beheaded. Live by the sword and die by the sword. I'll rejoice the day the House of Saud is consigned to the history books.

It's not like it's a medieval beheading anyway. They draw off so much blood and dope them up so much they literally have to drag them to the block to begin with. They're literally in decompensated shock when the sword falls down.

If you ever watch any of the videos of them doing it, there's a reason you don't see fountains of blood.


Ummmm...why are you watching videos of people getting beheaded in Saudi Arabia?
 
2013-03-11 09:55:10 PM  
1.bp.blogspot.com

When you hire the right guy for the job, you know there can be only one.

/This better turn into a Highlander thread pretty goddamn quick or you're all turning in your Fark cards.
 
2013-03-11 10:00:42 PM  

Generation_D: These 8th century goat herders that won the oil lotto need to be beheaded.


i.imgur.com

They've already started delaying mass crucifixions. What the fark more do you want?
 
2013-03-11 10:03:00 PM  

eyeq360: Beheading people by sword in one blow is pretty hard to do.  It takes a lot of talent.


A chainsaw would be FAR more efficient, but NOOO... That would be too barbaric...
 
2013-03-11 10:04:41 PM  

Generation_D: I'll rejoice the day the House of Saud is consigned to the history books.


So will most of the world, including most of the world's Muslims. Saudi Arabia.....treats objects like women, man.

Seriously, when Muslims worldwide go on Hajj, the Saudis issue them a special visa that says: you can briefly get into Mecca (and Medina if you want), do your few days and GTFO. And don't let them catch you going elsewhere or you're farked.
 
2013-03-11 10:04:50 PM  
You know what they say... no noose is good noose.
 
2013-03-11 10:04:54 PM  

Generation_D: These 8th century goat herders that won the oil lotto need to be beheaded. Live by the sword and die by the sword. I'll rejoice the day the House of Saud is consigned to the history books.


Wait until you meet their replacements.
 
2013-03-11 10:05:44 PM  
I am wondering if they are looking to see if there are some men from Calais that could do the job?
 
2013-03-11 10:05:51 PM  
Job security!

media.screened.com
 
2013-03-11 10:06:18 PM  
Well, they've teched up to Steel, so it would be best just to upgrade their existing warrior units.
 
2013-03-11 10:07:58 PM  

Somacandra: [1.bp.blogspot.com image 400x214]

When you hire the right guy for the job, you know there can be only one.

/This better turn into a Highlander thread pretty goddamn quick or you're all turning in your Fark cards.


I know his name.
 
2013-03-11 10:09:33 PM  
encrypted-tbn1.gstatic.com

They will always lose.
 
2013-03-11 10:11:07 PM  

eyeq360: Beheading people by sword in one blow is pretty hard to do.  It takes a lot of talent.


Depends on the sword.

A nice German longsword would do it easy.
 
2013-03-11 10:11:17 PM  

whistleridge: eyeq360: Beheading people by sword in one blow is pretty hard to do.  It takes a lot of talent.

This guy did an ok job. In a suit, no less.



Fore!!
 
2013-03-11 10:12:30 PM  

Somacandra: [1.bp.blogspot.com image 400x214]

When you hire the right guy for the job, you know there can be only one.

/This better turn into a Highlander thread pretty goddamn quick or you're all turning in your Fark cards.


Ah, the voice of Eugene Krabs on SpongeBob.
 
2013-03-11 10:12:49 PM  
The former incumbent:
2.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-03-11 10:13:28 PM  
www.wearysloth.com
 
2013-03-11 10:13:40 PM  

AirForceVet: What are the retirement benefits for swordsmen?

/Hey, I might lose my job due to sequestration.


There's a great severance package...
 
2013-03-11 10:14:49 PM  

Ambivalence: hardinparamedic: Generation_D: These 8th century goat herders that won the oil lotto need to be beheaded. Live by the sword and die by the sword. I'll rejoice the day the House of Saud is consigned to the history books.

It's not like it's a medieval beheading anyway. They draw off so much blood and dope them up so much they literally have to drag them to the block to begin with. They're literally in decompensated shock when the sword falls down.

If you ever watch any of the videos of them doing it, there's a reason you don't see fountains of blood.

Ummmm...why are you watching videos of people getting beheaded in Saudi Arabia?


Because that's where they behead people. If they did it in France, he'd be watching videos of Frenchmen being beheaded. Duh.
 
2013-03-11 10:15:00 PM  
This leads me to wonder: how many swordsmen do they actually need to fit current trends?
 
2013-03-11 10:16:21 PM  

doglover: eyeq360: Beheading people by sword in one blow is pretty hard to do.  It takes a lot of talent.
Depends on the sword.
A nice German longsword would do it easy.

And the executioner.  It takes a special type of person to execute people by beheading with a sword.
I was reading a book on the various methods of judicial execution that have been used throughout history.  Pretty fascinating.
 
2013-03-11 10:16:30 PM  

Molavian: Somacandra: [1.bp.blogspot.com image 400x214]

When you hire the right guy for the job, you know there can be only one.

/This better turn into a Highlander thread pretty goddamn quick or you're all turning in your Fark cards.

Ah, the voice of Eugene Krabs on SpongeBob.


tiff.net

He told you not to bring that up.
 
2013-03-11 10:17:38 PM  
And we're allied with these scumbags. Yeah, we don't get to biatch about Iran or Pakistan anymore.
 
2013-03-11 10:17:43 PM  

Somacandra: When you hire the right guy for the job, you know there can be only one.

/This better turn into a Highlander thread pretty goddamn quick or you're all turning in your Fark cards.


Hassan CHOP!
 
2013-03-11 10:18:45 PM  

AirForceVet: What are the retirement benefits for swordsmen?

/Hey, I might lose my job due to sequestration.


There's a nice severance package.
 
2013-03-11 10:20:15 PM  
Yea I watched the Saudis behead two towers in New York a decade or so back. I think it created many American jobs too, as per the Cheney initiative.

/Beheading is still better than the Christian's version of burning people at the stake.
//But the christians did it because people of science are icky grossy and all that and must be killed to purify the stupids.
 
2013-03-11 10:21:08 PM  
Boris!  I've got a special - when can you work him in?

www.morethings.com

"I couldn't possibly sneak him in until Monday, Sir.  I'm booked solid!"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oHSkMwUa2i4


/ a favorite movie
 
2013-03-11 10:22:14 PM  
Saudi law allows the death penalty for many crimes. For example:

Adultery (Unmarried adulterers can be sentenced to 100 lashes, married ones can be sentenced to stoning.)
Apostasy (Apostates are sentenced to beheading but are usually given three days to repent and return to Islam.)
Armed robbery
Blasphemy
Carjacking
Drug smuggling
Fornication
Home invasion
Homosexuality (If a person is sodomized by his or her own consent, then he/she might also be sentenced to death)
Idolatry
Murder
Prostitution
Rape
Sedition
Sexual misconduct
Sorcery
Terrorism
Theft (fourth conviction)
Treason
Waging war on God
Witchcraft

I don't care how good the cous cous is, I ain't goin' there.
 
2013-03-11 10:22:21 PM  

Somacandra: [1.bp.blogspot.com image 400x214]

When you hire the right guy for the job, you know there can be only one.

/This better turn into a Highlander thread pretty goddamn quick or you're all turning in your Fark cards.


2.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-03-11 10:24:45 PM  
hardinparamedic: If you ever watch any of the videos of them doing it, there's a reason you don't see fountains of blood.

Which is why I hate watching those videos. Such a letdown.
 
2013-03-11 10:24:58 PM  

eyeq360: Beheading people by sword in one blow is pretty hard to do.  It takes a lot of talent.


Ok, so let's say it takes 2 or 3 hacks to get the head off, the heads still off. I fail to see a problem here.
 
2013-03-11 10:28:08 PM  
too stupid to build a guillotine
 
2013-03-11 10:29:34 PM  
i1.ytimg.com
you were supposed to fire up, we all fired up
 
2013-03-11 10:30:22 PM  
Came for HASAAAAAAAAN CHOP!, leaving satisfied.
 
2013-03-11 10:31:07 PM  

doglover: Saudi law allows the death penalty for many crimes. For example:

Adultery (Unmarried adulterers can be sentenced to 100 lashes, married ones can be sentenced to stoning.)
Apostasy (Apostates are sentenced to beheading but are usually given three days to repent and return to Islam.)
Armed robbery
Blasphemy
Carjacking
Drug smuggling
Fornication
Home invasion
Homosexuality (If a person is sodomized by his or her own consent, then he/she might also be sentenced to death)
Idolatry
Murder
Prostitution
Rape
Sedition
Sexual misconduct
Sorcery
Terrorism
Theft (fourth conviction)
Treason
Waging war on God
Witchcraft

I don't care how good the cous cous is, I ain't goin' there.


seriously.  i'm pretty much guilty of all of those things at one time or another in one form or another
(lol - 'cept i ain't no idolator)
 
2013-03-11 10:34:21 PM  

Millennium: This leads me to wonder: how many swordsmen do they actually need to fit current trends?


Yeah, seems like one would be enough for the entire country.  TFA said there were 76 beheadings all last year.

Do two a week for 38 weeks and kick it for the next 14.

It's a teacher-like workload.
 
2013-03-11 10:37:43 PM  

Magorn: The former incumbent:


A personal favorite cartoon of mine.

Applicable Quote: "Consequences, Schmonsequences, as long as I'm rich"
 
2013-03-11 10:37:54 PM  
I guess I'll scrap my plans of waging war on god with sorcery while I visit.
 
2013-03-11 10:39:15 PM  

Pathman: doglover: Saudi law allows the death penalty for many crimes. For example:

Adultery (Unmarried adulterers can be sentenced to 100 lashes, married ones can be sentenced to stoning.)
Apostasy (Apostates are sentenced to beheading but are usually given three days to repent and return to Islam.)
Armed robbery
Blasphemy
Carjacking
Drug smuggling
Fornication
Home invasion
Homosexuality (If a person is sodomized by his or her own consent, then he/she might also be sentenced to death)
Idolatry
Murder
Prostitution
Rape
Sedition
Sexual misconduct
Sorcery
Terrorism
Theft (fourth conviction)
Treason
Waging war on God
Witchcraft

I don't care how good the cous cous is, I ain't goin' there.

seriously.  i'm pretty much guilty of all of those things at one time or another in one form or another
(lol - 'cept i ain't no idolator)


Just about the only one on the list is apostasy. Not being Muslim I've never turned from Islam's teachings as I'm utter unawares of them and totally willing to talk about it with anyone if it means keeping my head on the neck it came with.

The rest? Yeah... I'm stayin' here.
 
2013-03-11 10:40:05 PM  
Anne Boylen called and mentioned her swordsman for a reliable reference.

Before la madame guillotine or whatever the French call it these days.
 
2013-03-11 10:40:09 PM  

doglover: Saudi law allows the death penalty for many crimes. For example:

Waging war on God
Witchcraft

I don't care how good the cous cous is, I ain't goin' there.


On my first reading, I misunderstood this to mean that they frowned deeply on MMOs.
 
2013-03-11 10:42:33 PM  

doglover: Saudi law allows the death penalty for many crimes. For example:

Adultery (Unmarried adulterers can be sentenced to 100 lashes, married ones can be sentenced to stoning.)
Apostasy (Apostates are sentenced to beheading but are usually given three days to repent and return to Islam.)
Armed robbery
Blasphemy
Carjacking
Drug smuggling
Fornication
Home invasion
Homosexuality (If a person is sodomized by his or her own consent, then he/she might also be sentenced to death)
Idolatry
Murder
Prostitution
Rape
Sedition
Sexual misconduct
Sorcery
Terrorism
Theft (fourth conviction)
Treason
Waging war on God
Witchcraft

I don't care how good the cous cous is, I ain't goin' there.


Sorcery and witchcraft?  So do they do the whole duck-weight-scale thing, or just say SHES A WITCH and off with her head?

/seriously though, never, ever EVER want to go to S.A. - its scary how easy one can get their head chopped off there
 
2013-03-11 10:43:27 PM  
So, they are switching to guns,  not SUVs?
 
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