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(Orlando Sentinel)   If you ask the 14-year-old girl you met on the internet if she's really a cop and she doesn't answer your question, you probably should not proceed with your plans to have sex with her   (orlandosentinel.com) divider line 93
    More: Florida, teachers, proceedings  
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10896 clicks; posted to Main » on 10 Mar 2013 at 5:16 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-03-10 01:17:31 PM
If you meet a 14 year old girl on the internet chances are she's a 32 year old cop.
 
2013-03-10 01:24:03 PM

teto85: If you meet a 14 year old girl on the internet chances are she's a 32 year old cop.


Well, where am I supposed to meet 14 year old girls then? Nobody goes to the mall anymore.

Things were so much simpler in the '80s.

/oblig (or should be anyway)
 
2013-03-10 02:05:39 PM
Oblig:

lawcomic.net
 
2013-03-10 02:06:34 PM
FTFA: The "girl" Brian Jansen, 36, was communicated with was a undercover detective...

Okay, goddammit. Seriously. The very FIRST sentence is a grammar clusterfark. What the fark happened to education in this country?
 
2013-03-10 02:22:07 PM

teto85: If you meet a 14 year old girl on the internet chances are she's a 32 year old cop.


where do you go to meet 32 year old cops
 
2013-03-10 02:23:15 PM
The "girl" Brian Jansen, 36, was communicated with was a undercover detective for the Daytona Beach Police Department.

In related news, pricipal caught sayof.
 
2013-03-10 02:32:21 PM
He also said if a 14-year-old girl had actually answered the door, he would never have had sexual relations with her.

So he was just showing up to warn her about people like him?
 
2013-03-10 02:37:08 PM
Why the hell would ANYONE at this point think a "hot 14 year old girl" on the internet wasn't a troll job, a cop, or perverted-justice.com (combination of troll job and cop)

Cripes.

c/s/b: 18 yrs ago I used to be on some of the same irc channels as these perverted justice guys, I watched them cut their teeth trolling what were known as "hngs" or horny net guys. It was great fun, all the regulars on irc did it.

Then these dorks went and made a career of it.
 
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2013-03-10 02:46:47 PM
where do you go to meet 32 year old cops

I met a semi-hot 32-ish female cop while I was walking down the street and she was waiting for a detail* job. We exchanged a few words and I resumed walking because my brain screams "bad idea!" when I contemplate getting involved with a cop.

* In Massachusetts police make a large fraction of their pay through work details. A city will pass an ordinance saying you can't do any work on the street or sidewalk without hiring a police officer to watch. Minimum 4 hour shift. There was probably some utility line work to be done later that morning.
 
2013-03-10 03:24:49 PM
Don't tell me how to run my life.
 
2013-03-10 04:27:12 PM
bbsimg.ngfiles.com

/Oblig
 
2013-03-10 04:27:58 PM
Ah the internet: where the women are actually men, the men are actually 14 year old kids, and the 14 year old kids are actually cops.
 
2013-03-10 05:20:28 PM

ZAZ: where do you go to meet 32 year old cops

I met a semi-hot 32-ish female cop while I was walking down the street and she was waiting for a detail* job. We exchanged a few words and I resumed walking because my brain screams "bad idea!" when I contemplate getting involved with a cop was rejected.


FTFY
 
2013-03-10 05:21:38 PM

Generation_D: Why the hell would ANYONE at this point think a "hot 14 year old girl" on the internet wasn't a troll job, a cop, or perverted-justice.com (combination of troll job and cop)

Cripes.

c/s/b: 18 yrs ago I used to be on some of the same irc channels as these perverted justice guys, I watched them cut their teeth trolling what were known as "hngs" or horny net guys. It was great fun, all the regulars on irc did it.

Then these dorks went and made a career of it.


As much as I hate hngs, perverted-justice does some pretty shiaty and borderline-legal things.
 
2013-03-10 05:21:52 PM

Spad31: FTFA: The "girl" Brian Jansen, 36, was communicated with was a undercover detective...

Okay, goddammit. Seriously. The very FIRST sentence is a grammar clusterfark. What the fark happened to education in this country?


Agreed. I read it three times to make sure my brain had not turned to whipped mashed potatoes.  On first reading, the girl's name is Brian, and the "with" blows it up a second time.

/Boiling my potatoes now.
 
2013-03-10 05:22:12 PM
"the athletics instructor asked if the girl was actually a cop but didn't get a response and went to the meet-up location anyway "

media.tumblr.com
 
2013-03-10 05:22:26 PM

FloydA: Ah the internet: where the women are actually men, the men are actually 14 year old kids, and the 14 year old kids are actually cops.


* and everyone is a lawyer
 
2013-03-10 05:22:28 PM
I'm waiting for someone to predate on a catcher.

Probably already been a Law & Order episode. Pretty easy plot to draw up, Chris Hanson type is found shot dead in the street, reports of a hoody wearing person caught fleeing the scene, detectives interrogate string of men caught but not convicted, eventually turns out to have been the daughter of a person who committed suicide after being ruined by catcher.

And for any normal male the personality of the 14 year old girl is generally enough to deter them. When you have a 32 year old person saying they're 14 the personality isn't sufficient to send grown men screaming about the degeneracy of this generation.
 
2013-03-10 05:23:13 PM

Spad31: FTFA: The "girl" Brian Jansen, 36, was communicated with was a undercover detective...

Okay, goddammit. Seriously. The very FIRST sentence is a grammar clusterfark. What the fark happened to education in this country?


Their be nuttin wrong with that there grammer Mr. Fancy educashun.
 
2013-03-10 05:29:52 PM

teto85: If you meet a 14 year old girl on the internet chances are she's a 32 year old cop.


Oh the irony of a 33 y/o cop in my hometown being investigated for soliciting a 13 y/o girl for sex online.  He's suspended with pay,  of course.

/not florida
 
2013-03-10 05:33:13 PM
Hai Guyz!

I jus turn14 yeah. Yayy! So momma n pops r goin out 2 c a film.
Ne1 want 2 party wi me?

My name is Priscilla but every1 calls me Candy becos Im so sweeeeeeeeeeet. LOL!
Some friends call me Virgin. I think dats becos my middle name is Virginia.
Can u tell me what does Virgin mean?
 
2013-03-10 05:35:57 PM

Spad31: FTFA: The "girl" Brian Jansen, 36, was communicated with was a undercover detective...

Okay, goddammit. Seriously. The very FIRST sentence is a grammar clusterfark. What the fark happened to education in this country?


Yep. Sadly that happens in a lot of Orlando Sentinel and Sun Sentinel articles, especially the Sun Sentinel. Pretty sure they farm the work out to the local elementary school and fired all the editors.
 
2013-03-10 05:42:33 PM
Stories make it to fark all the time where teachers are banging students and moms are banging their kid's friends. Why aren't there any stings setup to catch female pedophiles?
 
2013-03-10 05:45:47 PM

louiedog: Stories make it to fark all the time where teachers are banging students and moms are banging their kid's friends. Why aren't there any stings setup to catch female pedophiles?


I'd say they're more likely to be opportunistic, such as those under their care, rather than sort out like male paedophiles.
 
2013-03-10 05:47:19 PM
Don't worry, I'm just a 13 year old boy pretending to be a 32 year old man to get 13 year old girls to talk to me on the internet. Who goes to jail when I send them naked pictures?
 
2013-03-10 05:47:27 PM

GungFu: Hai Guyz!

I jus turn14 yeah. Yayy! So momma n pops r goin out 2 c a film.
Ne1 want 2 party wi me?

My name is Priscilla but every1 calls me Candy becos Im so sweeeeeeeeeeet. LOL!
Some friends call me Virgin. I think dats becos my middle name is Virginia.
Can u tell me what does Virgin mean?


You tried too hard. A 14 y/o that doesn't know what a virgin is? On the internet?
 
2013-03-10 05:50:25 PM
Aboriginal societies commonly have such relationships.  Crazy how all of those kids grow up such an emotional wreck...oh wait.
 
2013-03-10 05:52:29 PM

Spad31: FTFA: The "girl" Brian Jansen, 36, was communicated with was a undercover detective...

Okay, goddammit. Seriously. The very FIRST sentence is a grammar clusterfark. What the fark happened to education in this country?


Second. As in, I agree with you.

Also like such as, it was the second sentence.
 
2013-03-10 05:53:51 PM

randomjsa: GungFu: Hai Guyz!

I jus turn14 yeah. Yayy! So momma n pops r goin out 2 c a film.
Ne1 want 2 party wi me?

My name is Priscilla but every1 calls me Candy becos Im so sweeeeeeeeeeet. LOL!
Some friends call me Virgin. I think dats becos my middle name is Virginia.
Can u tell me what does Virgin mean?

You tried too hard. A 14 y/o that doesn't know what a virgin is? On the internet?


R U a Cop?
 
2013-03-10 06:00:58 PM
1. No means no  (for one side)
2. Just say no  (for the other)

If in doubt, wait it out.

one in the bush equals two in the slammer  (or is that the other way around?  does that work?)

/so many catchphrases to prevent stupidity...
 
2013-03-10 06:01:28 PM
"How do I get 12-year-old girls excited?"
 
2013-03-10 06:06:04 PM
This can only lead to one thing.

When pedophiles start chatting up 14 year olds on the internet they'll just have to be careful not to say anything that might incriminate them until they have a chance to stalk them first and make sure they really do go to junior high.

Or maybe not. I used to watch To Catch a Predator. Those guys were some seriously stupid (and creepy) people - especially that one who got busted by Chris Hansen twice.

I don't think they ever did it, but it would be interesting to hear some of their stats. How many people did they engage on the internet that seemed interested even after finding out they were talking to a minor but never followed through with a visit?
 
2013-03-10 06:07:20 PM
News flash:  undercover cops are allowed to lie when asked, "Are you a cop?"

http://www.snopes.com/risque/hookers/cop.asp

I really wish that stupid urban legend would die already.

On the other hand, by now, people should realize that if you're an adult, the 14 year old girl you're interacting with on the internet is probably a cop.  So maybe this is just an IQ test.  I mean, how long has Chris Hansen been on the air, and how many news stories are there like this?
 
2013-03-10 06:07:48 PM
So why did they arrest the cop?
 
2013-03-10 06:09:18 PM
"I knew it, I knew it. My life is over. I made a stupid decision," he said.

Enjoy your public defender.  No decent defense attorney is going to risk his record after that...
 
2013-03-10 06:11:10 PM
Bloodninja: Baby, I been havin a tough night so treat me nice aight?
BritneySpears14: Aight.
Bloodninja: Slip out of those pants baby, yeah.
BritneySpears14: I slip out of my pants, just for you, Bloodninja.
Bloodninja: Oh yeah, aight. Aight, I put on my robe and wizard hat.
BritneySpears14: Oh, I like to play dress up.
Bloodninja: Me too baby.
BritneySpears14: I kiss you softly on your chest.
Bloodninja: I cast Lvl 3 Eroticism. You turn into a real beautiful woman.
BritneySpears14: Hey...
Bloodninja: I meditate to regain my mana, before casting Lvl 8 Penis of the Infinite.
BritneySpears14: Funny I still don't see it.
Bloodninja: I spend my mana reserves to cast Mighty of the Beyondness.
BritneySpears14: You are the worst cyber partner ever. This is ridiculous.
Bloodninja: Don't f**k with me biznitch, I'm the mightiest sorcerer of the lands.
Bloodninja: I steal yo soul and cast Lightning Lvl 1,000,000 Your body explodes into a fine bloody mist, because you are only a Lvl 2 Druid.
BritneySpears14: Don't ever message me again you piece.
Bloodninja: Robots are trying to drill my brain but my lightning shield inflicts DOA attack, leaving the robots as flaming piles of metal.
Bloodninja: King Arthur congratulates me for destroying Dr. Robotnik's evil army of Robot Socialist Republics. The cold war ends. Reagan steals my accomplishments and makes like it was cause of him.
Bloodninja: You still there baby? I think it's getting hard now.
Bloodninja: Baby?
 
2013-03-10 06:12:38 PM

Happy Hours: This can only lead to one thing.

When pedophiles start chatting up 14 year olds on the internet they'll just have to be careful not to say anything that might incriminate them until they have a chance to stalk them first and make sure they really do go to junior high.

Or maybe not. I used to watch To Catch a Predator. Those guys were some seriously stupid (and creepy) people - especially that one who got busted by Chris Hansen twice.

I don't think they ever did it, but it would be interesting to hear some of their stats. How many people did they engage on the internet that seemed interested even after finding out they were talking to a minor but never followed through with a visit?


Ever spend time in a chat room? The guys that these stings catch are not pedophiles, but usually just desperate guys. They would be more likely to message a woman 20-30 than a 14 year old. These stings just make it so the DA looks like he is catching pedos, but in reality, pedos are more likely to be someone who actually knows the children.

Also, pedophiles are after children, not teenagers.
 
2013-03-10 06:14:23 PM
I wanna be the first to pose as a 32 yr old guy and go after all the illegal 14 yr old girls trying to hook up with me.
 
2013-03-10 06:17:23 PM

Brakefornobody: "How do I get 12-year-old girls excited?"


Came for exactly that. That moment and the closing sequences were fantastic. (The library date was very Raj)
 
2013-03-10 06:22:21 PM

geekbikerskum: News flash:  undercover cops are allowed to lie when asked, "Are you a cop?"

http://www.snopes.com/risque/hookers/cop.asp

I really wish that stupid urban legend would die already.


Me too, I get tired of having to tell people (not hookers) that I'm not a cop.  I don't care what law you're about to break, and just because I have short hair and shave regularly doesn't mean I'm law enforcement.
 
2013-03-10 06:24:02 PM

wildcardjack: I'm waiting for someone to predate on a catcher.

Probably already been a Law & Order episode.


NCIS, season 3, episode 13.
 
2013-03-10 06:25:08 PM
Dumbass.  You don't ask, "Are you a cop?"  The cops are allowed to lie.

/You ask, "Hey, you were just roleplaying when you said you were 14, right?  You're really of legal age?"
 
2013-03-10 06:26:27 PM
I could totally take a 14 year old cop
 
2013-03-10 06:26:49 PM

rogue49: 1. No means no  (for one side)
2. Just say no  (for the other)

If in doubt, wait it out.

one in the bush equals two in the slammer  (or is that the other way around?  does that work?)

/so many catchphrases to prevent stupidity...


It's not the size of the grass on the field, but if there's motion on the ocean play ball.
 
2013-03-10 06:37:24 PM

Happy Hours: This can only lead to one thing.

When pedophiles start chatting up 14 year olds on the internet they'll just have to be careful not to say anything that might incriminate them until they have a chance to stalk them first and make sure they really do go to junior high.

Or maybe not. I used to watch To Catch a Predator. Those guys were some seriously stupid (and creepy) people - especially that one who got busted by Chris Hansen twice.

I don't think they ever did it, but it would be interesting to hear some of their stats. How many people did they engage on the internet that seemed interested even after finding out they were talking to a minor but never followed through with a visit?




How many people actually find minors on the Internet to molest?

Stats I have seen say 99% are known to the minor(e.g. relatives, priests, teachers, etc. ).
 
2013-03-10 06:39:49 PM
Perverted Justice must have come across an underage boy pretending to be an older guy trying to get with an underage girl..... All those people and that's never happened? ....Just want to see how pissed off he gets for wasting his time.

/I assume his mom would have dropped him off with condoms and wine coolers
 
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2013-03-10 06:40:59 PM
/You ask, "Hey, you were just roleplaying when you said you were 14, right? You're really of legal age?"

Some guys use the "I knew it was an adult all along" defense. You tend to hear about the cases where it didn't work. Prosecutors rarely put out press releases boasting that the jury returned a not guilty verdict in the case of People v. Studman.
 
2013-03-10 06:41:16 PM
How about not proceeding to have sex with any 14-year-old girl at all? Why is that too much to ask? Surely you can convince a woman of legal age to have sex with you, and if not, then you don't deserve to get laid, and should stay on good terms with your hand.
 
2013-03-10 06:50:16 PM

LarryDan43: Don't worry, I'm just a 13 year old boy pretending to be a 32 year old man to get 13 year old girls to talk to me on the internet. Who goes to jail when I send them naked pictures?


EVERYBODY!
 
2013-03-10 06:51:45 PM

geekbikerskum: News flash:  undercover cops are allowed to lie when asked, "Are you a cop?"

http://www.snopes.com/risque/hookers/cop.asp

I really wish that stupid urban legend would die already.

On the other hand, by now, people should realize that if you're an adult, the 14 year old girl you're interacting with on the internet is probably a cop.  So maybe this is just an IQ test.  I mean, how long has Chris Hansen been on the air, and how many news stories are there like this?


If watching documentaries are anything to go by, streetwalkers soon realised the 'Are you a cop' route was pointless and instead asked what they thought were johns to show them their cocks to be sure.

I suppose if a cop went around showing their cocks, it might not look too good or something.
Anyway, which leads me to think why they do something similiar online?

If some teen is open to be farked by some stranger, then they would be damn open to showing their openings on camera first. Now THAT's how you know she's not a cop!

/can I patent this idea?
 
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